#im so predictable it's the found family that gets me every time

[stargirl230]

thanks for the light

I was just trying to figure out how procreate works but then the op brainworms got to me and 35 hours later here we are! can you tell I miss home-cooked meals :')

(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)

[fanaticsnail]

Beautiful

Masterlist Here

Word Count: 1,400+

Synopsis: Big Mom has found her son, Charlotte Katakuri, a partner she deemed worthy enough for him to court for matrimony. While he is smitten immediately with you, he is determined to make a good impression on you by not revealing his face. Your curiosity gets the better of you.

Warnings: Katakuri x f!reader, talks of husband and wife, use of bride, massaging face, fluff, so fluffy.

Notes: wrote this half-dazed at 6:30am this morning because @gingernut1314 decided she needed the big man in her life and the brain-worm got me. Here he is, the big guy all for you, sweetheart. Art link

Tag List: @feral-artistry @i-am-vita @indydonuts @sordidmusings @since-im-already-here @writingmysanity @mfreedomstuff @daydreamer-in-training

Being courted by the Minister of Flour was not something you had ever pictured to be highlighted on your impressive resume. When you first received an invitation from the Charlotte family to venture to Komugi island, this was not an outcome you predicted for yourself. 

Charlotte Katakuri, the second son and third child of Big Mom, was told to find a bride. His orders were received, the date of his nuptials set, and his suit picked out for such an excitable occasion. The only thing that had not been set in stone was the partner joining him at his side after their soft march down the aisle. 

Your family was titled, strong, and one of the only families Big Mom had deemed worthy enough to usher in a new generation of pirates to join in taking the Charlotte name. Katakuri had no choice but to obey his mother, apprehensively accepting the terms of an arranged marriage against his own desires to simply live to protect his siblings, nieces, and nephews. While this was out of his control, what he could control was how his intended bride depicted him. 

He could continue to shield his face from you. His rationale was as such, “If they never view my face, they would never have reason to fear me.” And so he did as such, hiding his face beneath the fur shroud from the moment he met you, and every courtship session soon thereafter. As he laid his eyes on you for the first time, he was immediately smitten. Taken by your appearance alone, and your willingness to sign your name beside his on the registry to set your intentions to wed in stone, he could never be more proud to have a partner such as you. 

As his trust in you began to build, he slowly allowed you into his heart, and shared his burdens with you as Minister of Flour. He confided in you, relishing in your company as he openly courted you under the watchful chaperone of his younger sister, Charlotte Brûlée. 

One such occasion, he laid out a blanket for you and drew out a large wicker basket from behind his back. He presented you with an assortment of baked sweets and pastries with a soft blush dusting his cheeks beneath the fur shroud. While you accepted the treats with gratitude, you instead placed it beside you and knelt on the blanket, tapping your lap and asking him to lay on his back. 

“Tell me about your day, intended. I want to know every detail,” you smiled mischievously up at him. He cautiously stole a look at Brûlée, who emphatically ushered him to do as he was told with flailing hands. 

Lowering himself onto the mat beside you, he awkwardly shifted himself to attempt to do as you asked. Rolling your eyes, you reach your hands up to his shoulder and gently guide his larger form to lay his head in your lap. His entire head was the size of both of your thighs together, but you had no qualms or complaints about it. 

“Come on, I don't bite,” you reassured him with a soft laugh, “Let me hear about your journeys abroad. Tell me anything that you want, you have my complete attention.” He was a giant, but so incredibly gentle and sweet to those he deemed as family. 

Coaxing his head onto your lap, he immediately drew his hand up to his mask and secured it over his lips to keep his mouth and teeth hidden from your sight. You chose to ignore this, drawing your fingers up and settled him atop your thighs as he slowly, quietly spoke about his life to you. 

While Charlotte Katakuri was immediately taken by you in the registry office with your family and his, you were horrified by the sight that was met with you. You had heard stories about some of the Charlotte's being of unusual size and stature, but you had no idea exactly how tall your intended was. His form was almost three times your size, his intimidating appearance did nothing to stifle your nerves. 

Believing to have masked your concerns at the nuptuals well enough to be believable, your nerves all but melted away the moment his soft, soothing voice checked in with you afterwards. Charlotte Katakuri was a sweetheart, a 504cm tall sweetheart with such softness within his hardened exterior. 

Reclining his head on your lap, you rubbed at his plum-colored hair as he spoke about adventures away from Komugi. His hand gestures out in a flurry in front of his chest, pointing to the sky as he speaks so eloquently to you. Although he does not yet trust you enough for you to reveal his face, your curiosity begins to gnaw at the seams. 

You start to lower his inhibitions by massaging his scalp, scruff of his neck and forehead. His hair pricks your skin as your skillful touch chips away at his woes and worries. His voice quietens further as he closes his eyes as your hands firmly press against his forehead. You needed to see your soon to be husband’s face, you desperately craved to know what was going on beneath the furs. 

As he leans into your touch, he seemingly forgets about the shroud over his mouth hiding his sharpened teeth from you. He is in bliss beneath your hands, and he slips away into a world carved by your palms and fingertips. Your hands dip deeper, lower into his cheeks, your digits feeling his muscles relax their tension beneath your fingers. 

Smiling to yourself softly as he gasps at such sweetness befalling from you to him, he parts his lips gently. He arches his head further into your lap, the shroud finally lowering and revealing his sharp teeth and unnaturally widened mouth. His jaw falls slack as his brow becomes relaxed. 

You crave to coo at his vulnerability, truly enjoying empathetically how much he allowed himself to relax into your soft touch. This hardened general, this pirate minister, this older brother to so many siblings in the Charlotte family, was as malleable as rice flour mochi beneath your skilled digits. You took in his appearance, almost relieved at feeling the twin slits up his lips as you looked down at him with nothing but pure adoration. 

You were immediately in love with what you saw, your heart beating heavily against your ribcage as a warm flush rose to your cheeks. You loved him, all of him.

Brushing your hands over his cheeks, you silently and slowly commit his face to memory like reading a marble carving with a simple touch. He is gorgeous, and you remember to tell him so when he snaps out of his tranquility and looks at you with accusing eyes the moment he realized you slipped the shroud over his chin. 

“What are you doing?” he growls quietly, “Why did you do that? I don't want you to fear me-...” A soft gasp flees from your lips as you take him completely in. His lips split up his cheeks in an unnatural slit through symmetrical scars, his sharp fangs extend up on his lower jaw and over his lips. 

Although he feels slightly betrayed at the way you managed to easily reveal his face, his betrayal is eclipsed by shock and awe when he meets your eyes. 

“I-I just…” you trail off, your body cowering away in response to his anger, but your eyes still depict the emotion you so desperately desired to show him, “...-I just wanted to know. I wanted to see.” Charlotte Brûlée watched the interaction with interest, her own shock evident on her face. 

She witnessed the entire interaction with your hands on his face, almost calling out to warn her brother his face was going to be revealed, but quietly hoping you would fall in love with him further. She knew you loved him, knew you wanted to see him, and trusted you enough with her older brother that she knew you would love him more the moment his fangs and scars were brought into the light.

He was expecting fear, disgust, anguish and anger to be met in your curious gaze. But all you held in those calm and half-lidded orbs was pure trust, love, and pure adoration. His shock was adamant as he nervously floated his eyes between your gaze. His thumb and index finger circled around your much smaller hand, hovering it over his cheek as you felt your heart soar at the vulnerability.

“And now that you have?” his whisper came out more like a gasp, his voice breathy and craved to hear you say you weren’t afraid. He needed to know you did not fear his appearance, his wordless prayers spoken within his mind’s eye the longer your gaze soaked in his sight. 

You placed your unoccupied hand on his cheek, leaning in closer to his face and your lips curling into a soft, innocent and intimate smile. Caressing his cheek, you cocked your head to the side and finally uttered a single word he truly did not ever think he would hear. 

“Beautiful.”

[lokorum]

Hi, I have been following you for some time and just read you also have cats. Can we see them or can you tell us about them? I love seeing people's cats but can't have any since I'm allergic.

oh gosh, this is like the ultimate-nicest-ask any person could ever recieve and i still made you wait for the reply, im so so sorry!! classic case of unlucky timing happend - your ask came on the next day after one of our cats had to be put down through euthanasia. im only now feeling like talking about her, hope you'll understand <3

also warning: someone here is obsessed with their cats so prepare yourself for a lot of pictures!!!

so this is her, our obachan that was somewhere around 16-17 yo at the moment of her death (no one knows how old she was for sure, and we called her a necromant bc doctors predicted her death like 10 times and she lived and lived and lived. our friend said that everytime death came for her she just stared at it with her unblinking eyes, forcing it to leave lskdjflkdsjf)

near the end of her life she had no teeth, progressing cancer, brain tumor that caused epilepsia but she still was the god's smallest gremlin, (and the most adorable too) creating havoc everywhere she went

the other cat that we adopted is this little goofball

she literally found us on the street near our home back in ulan ude and just followed us there asking food. she was our neighboors cat, but they left her behind after moving, saying some bullshit like they coudnt catch her (while she was activelly asking to be held when she came to us. she was pregnant too, and very, very anxious)

she is the most shy cat i ever met; text book wall-flower, but now after almost 5 years together she is much more brave!! tho she still scared of blankets and towels for the reasons that makes want to return back to uu and violently kill her previous family

also can anyone tell me what is this

and heres our first cat and the only one we havent adopted from the street but from a different family!! she is the youngest and the cheekiest little seagle that loves to terrorize everyone and since she is very very cute - she gets away with it every time

she also is notoriously hard to catch in a photo, and when we finally able to - she is just chilling in the most bizzare places like in the freezer

on the toilet cistern

on the computer box

on the bysicle seat

inside the drawer inside the box

on the bench

inside the cat bag

i found one (1) picture of her in the bed and it looks like this

like almost anyone who has cat family member - i could talk about their little habbits for hours but i think what i already said is too much so im putting myself on the leash here lkjsdflkjasjd thank you so much for listen to my rumblings!!! i cant deny it feels kinda healing to talk about all of them now and that happened thanks to you @dabenport so sending you a lot of hugs!! ٩(��ᗜˋ*)و ♡ also i have allergy on cats psldkf;sdkf;lkd;lf so i hope that maybe one day you'll be able to find less allergic cat friends to share your life with!!! im sneezing a lot but its worth it

[with-my-calamitous-love]

bnha ending spoilers! specifically for touya!

so. he’s alive but like barely 💔

touya todoroki is my favourite character from the entire series, one of them at least. i predicted for him to have an azula type ending, and in a way he did. he didn’t die, but he wasn’t redeemed. theres theories and guesses out there, but his fate is ultimately left unknown.

i think this is a good ending for him, and heres why.

i know a lot of people (myself included) wanted to see touya make amends with his family. and as much as it breaks my heart that the tdrk siblings didn’t necessarily get the happy ending they deserved, to me it seems more real that way.

as someone who grew up in a not-so-good household, and related to a lot of the struggles their family went through, i thought that the ending was comforting in a way. for me, it was reassurance that healing doesn’t have to be amends. sometimes, forgiveness isn’t always the ending. for touya, that wasn’t the case. he was mentally stuck as a traumatized child after being in a coma for three years. he went home to realize that his father didn’t forget about him, that he was just never impacted by him. that does something to a child.

and considering the abuse that every sibling in that family had to endure, it makes sense that forgiveness isn’t always how it ends. i actually agree with natsuo going no contact with endeavour- i found that relatable since i’m that way with my own. and i find ir even more gut-wrenching seeing how fuyumi had tried to hold the family together, since thats usually how oldest daughters operate.

and my heart just breaks just thinking about shouto. as a youngest child myself, i can’t imagine a world where i didn’t need my big siblings. youngest children often get a bad rap and for good reasons, but its also incredibly painful watching your older siblings go through things and feeling powerless.

if theres one thing i’ve learned, and one thing i think the bnha ending has taught us, life goes on. time moves fast. months melted into 8 years really quickly. im sure natsuo married his girlfriend. im sure rei is much happier and healthier than she was. im sure fuyumi is doing great. i hope that endeavour is a better person. i hope that shouto is healing from all that he’s gone through.

and though we don’t know what happened to touya in those 8 years, i hope he knows that at least, his family is healing. that they’re not the same family that broke him.

i am biased because again i relate to these characters and their struggles a lot! so know that you’re completely allowed to have a different opinion. i absolutely loved the bnha ending 🤍 thank you, thank you, THANK YOU HORIKOSHI!

[ganseyenthusiast]

anyways since the theme of post-TRK seems to be that every single character ignores any development they had and gets worse, I'm listing everything out here + with a rating of how likely I, the authority of everything ever, think it was. greywaren spoilers obviously

1. Declan: Decides Dad was good all along, disregards real actual emotional abuse and parentification as "misremembering" how great Niall was. 6/10. CDTHEU Declan is a very different character to TRK Declan, I still think he's been too self aware throughout to suddenly walk it back THIS severely. I predict a severe breakdown for him age 30 since I've never witnessed someone do Denial as their last stage of grief.. it’s gonna be explosive

2. Ronan: Disregards his family for the majority of his arc, is worse to them than in TRC. does not call gansey for months. finds a new FP instead of a therapist. emotionally worse off. does find himself via terrorism I guess? 9/10. pretty on brand for Ronan to go scorched earth and suffer zero consequences. I do wish he was made aware of his birth circumstances and displayed the same love/grief for aurora/niall that he's shown in every book except greywaren. are you telling me he can look at the New Fenian and be OKAY?????

3. Adam: ‘Reinvents’ himself, suffers, lies, suffers again. Does not call gansey. Suffers in the VoidSpace, apparently with no lasting consequences. becomes a narc. 7/10. I was hoping for a more self aware adam post TRK but him choosing to pull a Henry Cheng is also pretty on brand. wish he'd actually broken up with Ronan for at least a week. him becoming a narc is unfortunately pretty accurate to character but government jobs are not famously well paying so it really does feel random? the only thing he’s done that’s close to sleuthing is inventing pedo murder charges for his teacher/keeping with the bryde stuff. plus he's still not utilizing his magic skill so this just feels like a continuation of the Harvard arc for the rest of his life which is REALLY baffling when u compare how many times TRK insists he's a magician and will remain a magician/psychic despite everything. seems he's growing MORE disconnected with himself. i’m all for negative development but it’s really being framed as a happy ending which is baffling ngl

4. Gansey: has a sociology degree + is only associated with blue (and nobody else) in the 4-5 years since TRK. Completely reversed his stance on henrietta being home, on "I'd take all of you anywhere with me", on his dedication to history/archeology. does not seem too concerned about Ronan going insane, still odd despite the time he's had to get used to it. 5/10. horrible representation of gansey but I DO like that he's focusing on himself instead of raising pynch. as i say this i remember the ring thing and grit my teeth. complete ignorance of Henry AFTER his whole "friends forever and ewer" TRK thing gives me a good playground to make things worse so I like it but it's definitely weird. how did being a teenager specifically suck for you king because I think Being Dead trauma is unrelated to age

5. Matthew: nearly found independence + love in the abrasive way that lynches give it, then was disregarded emotionally and still not given an apology for the Everything from declan. 8/10. extremely on brand for the lynches to not hold each other accountable. Matthew seems to have improved somewhat + Declan is less overbearing about him, so I like it, I'll take it

6. Henry: went into Seondeok's black market low level mob business, got divorced?, does not speak to bluesey. 10/10. it’s so bad. absolutely off brand for the entire theme of him rejecting the Orders his mother who Literally Forced him to come to henrietta gave him (did not begin this game looking for a friend etc). refutes the entire "find your own something more" theme, refutes the "three of us" theme, refutes the "im going to make something great" motives. and I love it. TRULY my worst ending for Henry is becoming yet another fairy market nepotism casualty. he will Literally never escape and it’s FANTASTIC it is so much fun. Ha Ha You Have Become Your Mother

7. Fenian/Mor: live at the fucking barns now. 1/10. you are telling me a series whose entire THING is based on growing up/overcoming grief/moving on ends with THE FUCKING LYNCH FAMILY BACK AT THE BARNS?????????? WHAT THE HELL???? WHY IS EVERYONE OKAY WITH ANY OF THIS??????????????????????????????????????????????????

[blazethecheeto]

ATLAS PARADOX RAMBLING

dude this book. i need to talk. about it. im going insane.

everyone who hasn't read it, PLEASE DO!!! it's a dark academia book about a bunch of gay silly magic people that join a society and try to kill each other. there's time travel, a big ass polycule, aesthetic scenes, the prettiest writing style in the world, science, philosophy, and fucked family. (opposite of found family).

(extremely chaotic unorganized long rant below, with spoilers. click at your own risk)

FIRST OF ALL WHY WAS THIS SO MUCH BETTER THAN THE FIRST ONE?!!?!?

i had to power through the first one, it felt long, and unnecessary and like trekking through a JUNGLE with the thickest and most intricate ecosystem that i had to peel back and unravel for hours and hours. only to like move the plot by an inch.

BUT THIS. olivie blake found her footing because this was so good. i am aware the reviews hate on this book and some people don't like it, but personally i adore it and it's really well written.

CHARACTERS

bro they all had such wonderful voices, like they were distinct and unique from each other but not drastically, noticeably different I NEED TO LEARN FROM THIS. six of crows and the atlas six do multi povs so well <3 its like this book was made for me, each character was perfect and incredible and gay and silly and-

reina. love of my life. i look forward to all her povs because the plants are so silly and she's the best character. i said it. she's canon asexual now too YEES. i needed more of her because she was barely in the first one, and they DELIVERED. the juicy plot with her 'god complex' (ily callum) and her feelings getting hurt and learning she actually is lonely and wants friends? she's so wanda maximoff. next book better have her opening up and learning to love people or i riot (and also her killing people and being the badass she is)

parisa always my fave too, i do wish her character wasn't always talking about sex or romance, there were some great moments in this book where she showed off her telepathy powers (the prince in the tower!!) it was awesome. i'm glad they acknowledged that side of her with reina, (oh my god i ship them so much wait till i rant about them-) but dude i still HATE DALTON. SO MUCH. OH MY GOD. every time it's her pov i dread seeing dalton, i wish she could give that up. generic white men should die.

CALLUM. whatever turned him from complex, daunting, and a psychopath last book to janus from sanders sides this book- beautiful choice. he's literally the one sassy wine-sipping gay aunt that feels nothing and everything at once, also extremely mentally ill and depressed. he's SO FUNNY. his povs are fucking hilarious to read, and he quickly became one of my faves bc of how complex he is. i'm not smart enough to decipher and psychoanalyze him but god i LOVE CHARACTERS LIKE THIS.

i don't know what happened but nico is literally one of my faves now too, he's so silly and sweet and kind and i loved his relationships with everyone this book. like him trying to murder tristan in multiple different ways oml. he's my bbg. tristan was hit or miss for me, i did find him interesting but he's not my favourite. doesn't mean i hate him, he's so very british, i feel it radiating off the page. libby my queen my icon, her dream povs were so trippy i loved it- so so realistic to a real dream, that was the most surprising and unique part. also my bisexual queen seducing belen??

i did not like ezra and atlas was a little iffy here and there but tbh the cast was so well rounded and interesting and unique but paralleled each other so well?? THE RELATIONSHIPS. I DONT THINK ANY BOOK HAS THIS INTRICATE WEB-LIKE RELATIONSHIPS WITH EACH OTHER. they're one big polycule.

RELATIONSHIPS

nico and libby <3 i love them so much as siblings/queerplatonic partners. i don't ship them romantically, because i LOVE how they subverted the eye-rolling predictable ' YA academic rivals enemies to lovers' trope. when i started TAS, i immediately thought they were gonna get together and assumed the worst. but no, they still had the banter and importance in their relationship but without the romance? instead both of them were gay af. it's beautiful. i love subverting tropes so much. they're each other's 'other half' and they're hilarious together.

NICO AND TRISTAN. they were such a highlight this book, it was unexpected but so funny. nico trying to murder tristan and their little talks because 'they're not friends...just coworkers' yeah right, the best friendships start with creatively murdering each other. tristan being droll and chill af, and then nico bouncing off the walls my adhd king.

reina and nico broke me?? like that one chapter where they sparred and caught up with each other and reina was guarding her hurt feelings. DUDE THAT KILLED ME. made me stare at the ceiling for a good minute. their friendship is everything to me, they contrast each other so well. she deserves to be treated better- when they had that projection chapter and she saw that nico downplayed her skills...like she was good, but not good enough for him to care about her. AGGHGH.

REINA AND PARISA. NOW THIS. THIS HOOKED ME INTO THE BOOK. i ship them so bad guys. they parallel each other and are both hot and enemies to lovers and wlw slow burn and- look. reina is asexual, therefore the only person to truly see and understand parisa for who she is, and not be influenced by her body. like that one projection. she can help parisa understand HERSELF and who she is past her sexual desirability. how to love someone again. romantically. then, on the flip side, parisa can help reina see and understand OTHERS. reina only sees people as one trait, cut and dry- without any of the complex feelings. parisa is a telepath, she knows how to read others. THEY CAN BOTH HELP EACH OTHER AND LOVE EACH OTHER IN WAYS THEY NEVER COULD HAVE OMFDADJFLSKJADFL- also reina pinned her against a wall and they want to kill each other and every time they interact i scream into my pillow-

-

'You can't love anyone right?"

"I've met very few people worth loving."

-

*throws myself off a building*

now we just gotta play the familiar game "IS IT DELUSION OR IS IT JUST SLOW BURN" and find out whether their insane chemistry pays off in book 3.

the nico parisa scene was actually sweet ngl, even though i don't ship them. the whole callum and tristan thing was so bitter exes situationship coded and i ate every second up. especially that last conversation. AND OFC. GIDEON AND NICO?!!! AAAAA THEY WERE SO CUTE THEY'RE ENDGAME I SCREAMED WHEN THEY KISSED DUDE THEYRE SO-

PLOT

now for the actual plot. this book has so many interesting subjects and philosophies and debates i'm not smart enough for this. but past all the aesthetic glamour, it's science, time travel, dreams, multiverses, fate, reality, and the complexities of the human mind. and my god it's fascinating as fuck.

do i have any idea what they do in this society?? NO. am i entertained? YES. especially that whole explosion paradox to bring libby back to the future. the whole powering the connections via aurora borealis? the whole debate about being gods? i love it. i love it.

alright im so sorry for that rant, i gotta go now but DUDE I LOVE THIS BOOK NO MATTER HOW WEIRD IT WAS

[coyotesinew]

Gonna be frank for a minute, I’ve been a bit out of touch with my nonhumanity recently.

I’m not losing connections by any means, but recently I haven’t been able to engage in ways I usually do. Mental shifts are few and far between, phantom shifts come and go in short moments. The most I’ve felt recently has been triggered in quick reactions—like loud sounds making my ears swivel or glimpses of small animals outside my window making my prey drive kick in for a second—but I haven’t had the longer shifts I’m used to. Feeling wolf-brained for days, my predictable full body morning phantom shifts, all my usual comforts. It’s been unbelievably uncomfortable.

I’ve known for a bit that stress can cause me to unintentionally stifle shifts, and this year has so far proven to be one of the most stress-filled times of my life, so it makes sense that I’m feeling this way. I won’t go into heavy detail, but this past month and a half has broken me down in a way I’ve never experienced & I don’t know when/if I’ll be built back up. I’ve gotten covid for the first time and my body and brain still aren’t back to what they were before, I’m fatigued and hurting, I’m dealing with very tense close-familial strain, and a million other little issues that pile and pile. The days are hard to get through.

Though it’s unintentional, my nonhumanity has always brought a comfortable sense of escapism. Daydreams and fantasies of rainy beaches and packs, dark streets and urban forests, security and livestock, have all brought me peace when feeling the world heavy on my shoulders. It feels more right than all my thoughts of the world I have to deal with as a human, but the state of things has become increasingly hard to bear and hard to ignore without immense guilt. As such almost all of my brain power ends up going to these issues.

I want so badly to feel like myself again, like an animal. I’m working on it but it’s rough. I’m taking every little thing in my life slowly because it’s all my mind and body will allow currently, I’m hoping mind + body + animalistic experiences will come back slowly too. I’m glad to have found an alternate form of nonhuman expression through more introspection/writing and focus on community engagement and informing while my raw feelings are hindered. Im glad I still have an outlet but I’d love to feel like myself soon, I just don’t know how soon soon will be.

I appreciate those that engage with me and care for my perspectives on stuff though, thank you for sticking around! Being able to engage with this community and interacting with everyone makes the days go a little faster and the weight a little lighter. 🩶

[whatthefuckisasweep]

okay i’ll ask you, when did you first get into It? was it the novel or another adaption? what do you think it is about the story that you love so much?

omgg!!! thanks for the ask joeover!!!!!!!! this is very cool i feel like im being interrogated in a good way

this is actually a really interesting story. so it was october and me and my roommate and my friend were doing a study session, but we also wanted to watch something for the season. watch some spooky movies, as you do. and my roomie was like, "oh have you seen IT (2017)?" and i was like, 'no". and so she was like, "it's pretty good. the second one is weird though"... and put it on.

now, dear asker, i'm not one to be into horror movies at all. im also not one to like a media like IT that much - most of the stuff I'm really in love with is mostly meant to be a comedy. i wasn't even paying that much attention to it at first while it played (i even made a really mean joke about not knowing who stan was cause he had such little lines). but when im exposed to a new media, i can't NOT put my attention on it if it catches my eye and consume it and have thoughts about it. so i started paying attention and i really liked the movie.

more than that though, i could already feel the potential of a fixation coming on. it was at the tail end of my asssassins creed fixation, so it was almost perfectly timed. when i get these sensations, i can never predict like what it's going to be, and i can almost NEVER go into something knowing im going to fixate on it. it just happens at random. and i guess i can choose to indulge or not, and my brain was like - "you heard about richie tozier being gay. watch the second one". and i did. and that's when i launched into the full fixation.

after that, i bought the novel (and read the whole thing jesus christ) and got involved with the community. i joined a reddie server and met Angel and Sunny who are honestly some of my best friends and the most talented people ever... I mean, you guys probably know Angel's comic Out of the Blue - and Sunny writes for their ORIGINAL comic. and i also met River, Reb, Bear, and Moony - we formed our fake little "losers club". everything i talked about, they matched my energy. we were always on the same wavelength and they were always incredibly kind people, and we STILL talk everyday as part of our routines. i know so much about them now. i 've even seen their mug collections and know all their pets by name haha. I EVEN GOT TO GET A BEAR HUG FROM IRL BEAR!!! seriously got besties for life from this stupid movie.

to answer that last part of the question - i think what intrigues me about IT is simply the Losers dynamic. Usually a story is about dynamics where one relationship is more important than the others. Typically it's the romance. but in IT, you get 7 people deeply in love with each other with all different but ALL VERY INTEGRAL dynamics. bill and eddie, bev and richie, stan and bev, mike and bill, ben and eddie - like every dynamic is SO juicy and also EQUALLY as valued. that type of found family where nobody in the canon plays favorites is incredibly rare. I think that's why my love for reddie started to fade, honestly, because i felt like a lot of people valued their romance higher than all the other dynamics. and that's my FAVORITE part of the series and what generally fuels my art. : )

hope this was interesting to you! : D thanks for the ask and letting me talk about myself for a little bit. was very nice of you. <3

[kissingagrumpygiant]

heard you're the go-to for being mean about twc 😈

fwiw, I've done two playthroughs and enjoyed one (not a's, which was incredibly mid) cause like... it's twc. it was never good, it was always cringe, it's just fun sometimes! i will prob play through the other routes too for comparison.

i thought m's route was unexpectedly sweet, but even aside from the questionable characters, the issues with the series are more obvious than they've ever been (i assume bc sera is spending less time on the sequels than she did on the debut?)

so my mean takes!

1. the writing style is hilariously bad. every single sentence is like obnoxiously detailed imagery. jarring hyperbole. sensory detail that makes no sense. let me imitate: "rain begins to crash down as if the sky was collapsing over us. the freezing cold of the water combined with its dizzying scent makes me almost fall over and throw up. ava's eyes are the precise colour of fresh grass but also the ocean but also the northern lights and change tone depending on her mood. my knees give out and i crumple like a handful of tinfoil." once you notice it you can't stop noticing it

2. the dialogue is so predictable. i get the vibe she uses any opportunity to stick in a behaviour she thinks each character would exhibit but it comes across sooo stilted like ok f makes a joke m makes an innuendo a says something really cringe or really mean n is polite but judgemental. wow this is so found family.

3. all situations seem to resolve in the most contrived ways possible? like she wants to cater to all the skill sets or whatever but it's like wow im being attacked. the bad guys will approach in slow motion while i deduce (sick of that word) a way to beat them 🤓 let me throw a pebble to hit the off button on their weapon.... invisibly create a tripping hazard... guess a fact about them which will scare them so much i can hit them over the head.... I'm such a good cop! like girl this makes no sense...

4. this is nitpicky but there were SO many pronoun/coding issues in this book. come on.

anyway whatever it's a cringe trying-to-be-apolitical fantasy romance story so it was never going to be good... but still!

oh my god the 'deduce' options were so fucking cringe im sorry u mean THINK? IM GONNA T H I N K ABOUT MY ACTION? or are we having bbc sherlock mind palace sequences is that the vibe

[movies-i-watched-this-week]

(Epic!!!) Winnie the Pooh Movies Ranking !!! (HELL YEAH! )

been meaning to make it for some time now, and i am happy to announce a ranking of winnie the pooh theatrical releases (6 movies in total, not much sadly). theres no lore behind it, no epic origin story of this idea, this took lots of time, just lets get this nostalgia bread guys!!!

the one movie i’d like to get off the way right now is the newest Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey , which is such an awful abomination of a motion picture, it might just be one of the worst movies of the year. but we are here to judge pooh movies by their pooh-iness (heh), so when a movie is not having any of that, or entirely misses the point of what winnie the pooh is supposed to be, im skipping it in this ranking. and even if this waste of time of a movie were listed on wikipedia for pooh films, it would be ranked right here, on the last place.

if you know me, youd know im fascinated by the childish joy of life winnie the pooh represents, as well as this little worlds’ iconic characters, and even after few decades it has its distinctive charm. saying that, i wanted to point out that i dont consider any of the movies on this list any bad (accept the one above), and if you know anything about these movies, theyre really hard to dislike. youd have to have lots of talent to fuck up a winnie the pooh movie. i also wont be talking a lot about the characters since... come on, its winnie the pooh, you know them. plus they are very similar in every movie, theyre great, i know theyre great, you know theyre great, we all love them.

starting with The Tigger Movie (2000) on place 6th, its just a fine little movie. with lovely performance from Jim Cummings it has probably the best music sequence in the whole frenchise  (round the family tree i think). its a movie full of energy which is reflected in the animation style as well, since the characters are animated using multiple rough lines, similar to old disney movies. only two winnie the pooh films are animated this way and its a joy to look at. though with story simple and predictible, i feel like some children from foster families would resonate with the message.

i felt unfair putting Pooh’s Heffalump Movie (2005) this low, but the competition is severe and it wins over the tigger movie by a long shot anyways. first of  i like how this film directly contradicts the tigger movie in the very first scene, where a portrait of tiggers family is shown. yeah that was funny. anyway, the whole movie is beautiful to look at, the background colors fit scenes perfectly depending on the mood, and you can feel the locations (fe. the big forest) towering over characters, especially with roo (who the movie focuses on), where everything around him is big and scary, which also ties up to his conflict of wanting to be a grown-up. it was also welcomed to get a little insight at kangas and roo’s relationship, which might just be the first movie that did that. with one of the best songs out of all movies and its childish happiness, its a proud solid 5th place

Winnie the Pooh (2011) was a hard one to place. i have all the respect for this movie for being the last 2d animated movie from disney, and i cant believe i just watched it first time few weeks ago. its animation is the best from all the movies (not counting Christopher Robin, as 2d > 3d imo), its colorful and bouncy, worth watching for that alone. for some reason its comforting the last 2d movie is a pooh one heh. i found this ones story most fun to follow, and it felt the closest to the original book/movie. it was great seeing all the characters interacting (some never seen before) and having a role, none of them is forgotten, their screentime well balanced out. it might also just be second funniest outta the bunch! its incredible, great to show to kids movie.

i know it might be controversial to put this movie this high, especially since winnie the pooh 2011 might objectively be a better movie, but i have such a soft spot for Piglet's Big Movie (2003) and its fun and clever storytelling. its structured with multiple short stories that reference the main simple plot (in contrast with the original book), and each segment has a charming musical number. its songs might just be the best out of all the movies, and the lyrics can get stuck in your head for some time heh. the story flows perfectly, its sweet and fun, beside some moments when other characters (like surprisingly pooh) are just such assholes to piglet for no reason. huh, weird. anyway, super likable film, some might dissagree but an easy 3th place.

now i have no idea if this is controversial or not, but i remember i fell in love with Christopher Robin (2018) as soon as i saw it in cinema. the cinematography is outstanding, every scene (especially in the hundred-acer woods) looks like a masterpiece, and just like the animated pooh movies advantage from being animated, this movie takes full advantage from being a live-action - with some shots even looking like animation brought to life. the cgi on main characters looks sweet and soft, like you would like to hug them. its similar to how the plushies the characters were originally based on look if anything. i loved the movies choice to have a grown up christopher robin and its adorable story of him finding his childish joy. christopher robin's story in pooh movies was always about getting to terms with growing up, but not losing the child-like happiness and imagination you made up your little world with, and im glad this movie kept to that. poohs character is also great, with what we didnt see before - his questions are dumbly thought-provoking and work incredibly well with christopher robins character. overall a great movie which, despite being a live-action, does just what every pooh movie - makes you smile the whole time youre watching it.

and the winner is (dramatic pause). the good ol' Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (1977). if im being honest i was not looking forward to watching this one, since i was somehow convinced it would be the most boring outta the bunch. but big surprise, its a super funny and adorable flick. the score is an iconic masterpiece which gets stuck in your head and its lovely to hear it referenced in later pooh movies. its such an imaginative movie and overall very fun, all characters have their moments and are just so lovable. its also really funny! im telling you its a great comedy! if you never seen it, highly recommend this one! animated perfection. timeless masterpiece

it might sound cheesy but its great a frenchise like this exists. its good to have a couple of movies about little things and silly shenanigans. i feel like we all need to come back to this little child’s world from time to time.

see you

[fairycosmos]

Yup, been facing a ghost problem for awhile now. It started when my aunt first relayed a story of someone in our family who practices black magic: one day, as she was making tomato sauce for my family, my grandfather heard her chanting something under her breath. They later packaged the sauce into jars. Weeks later, when they opened them, EVERY SINGLE JAR had needles sitting atop the sauce.

Some smaller stuff happened too. For instance, my aunts and all their friends regularly visited this "shrink"/psychic, and I can tell you all the things she accurately predicted/knew (including deaths).

This was what made me go from an atheist to a believer. That's when my encounters started. Anytime I would go to sleep without saying a prayer for protection, I was attacked. When it ended up giving me sleep paralysis, I woke up fuming, because I was so over it. I began to curse out whatever it was. Went into the kitchen. My mom was there, and only the stove light was on. She was on the counter opposite to the stove, as was I. Suddenly, I heard a loud "click", and everything went dark. My mom went, "Hey, why'd you turn it off? I'm still in here." NEITHER OF US WERE NEAR THE STOVE.

For a long time, nothing else happened, until recently. A new activity I've undertaken is going near the woods at night. However, my mom ended up having sleep paralysis the last two nights that I went. Whenever this happens, she starts wailing and crying in her sleep and someone has to wake her up.

Before I found out what she'd seen, I was getting ready to back out to the woods. However, a tweet caught my eye. Someone tweeted about driving through the forest at night and seeing people with their faces upside down running through a field. Under it was that famous reddit thread about a forest rescuer's paranormal encounters: https://www.reddit.com/r/nosleep/comments/3iex1h/im_a_search_and_rescue_officer_for_the_us_forest/

A story I remembered reading in it was from someone who went up the stairs, whose grandfather told them that they used to appear as doors, and never to go up them if you see any. Once I was done reading, I asked my mom what she saw.

Both nights, she saw a door. And behind that door was a faceless figure in a black cloak. Later, I find out the place I'd ventured to on those two nights was once a mass grave where the Chinese used to bury their dead, and their bodies had at one point been exhumed. Moreover, there's a rowing club I was sitting right across from that's listed as one of the most haunted places in my city.

The last time this occurred was a week ago when I finished watching the one of the most disturbing, demonic movies I've ever seen. And lastly, last night, my cat saw a ghost. I was watching videos of someone's haunted apartment (from this dude's profile, which has some insanely creepy videos). In one of his videos, their bar stool started moving by itself, and as I was watching it, my cat suddenly shot up from his sleep with wide eyes that started following something around the room. He was clearly seeing something I wasn't, and following its movements. Like clockwork, there was a sudden noise from the place his eyes were glued to, one that I'd heard before. Took awhile to get it out, judging by my cat's darting eyes.

(sorry for the length — i have more stories from others if you're interested tho lmao)

Both nights, she saw a door. And behind that door was a faceless figure in a black cloak. Later, I find out the place I'd ventured to on those two nights was once a mass grave where the Chinese used to bury their dead, and their bodies had at one point been exhumed. Moreover, there's a rowing club I was sitting right across from that's listed as one of the most haunted places in my city.

omg these are all so hyper-specific i wanna cry. i need you to be messing with me soooo bad like im serious lmfao 😭 the needles?? the stove?? the consistent sleep paralysis?? i would have never recovered. girl why would you start walking near the woods at night after that shit hello lmfao braver than i could literally ever be and im not even that much of a believer for real. over grounds where people are buried too, that is fucking crazy. also an upside down face is horrible imagery, jesus lmfao. this was really cool to read though, thank you for sharing <3 please keep yourself protected and stay away from listening to tales about family members who do black magic in the future LOL.

[imnotpayingforurtherapy]

EYYYYYY THE HALLUCINATIONS ARE BACK 🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️

I HAVE A 103.2° F FEVER AND CANT SLEEP

STORY TIME/RANT/BRAIN VOMMIT SOUP UNDER CUT

So i havent been able to sleep in able three weeks, my scedule pretty much being wake up at 7am, get read for school, be at school till 5pm, get home at 6pm, maybe make food if i have the energy, if not bed rot and try to sleep until 6:45am when exhaustion finally takes over, sleep till alarm goes off at 7am, attempt to get up and black out till around my dad comes in my room to scream at me to get up, force my body to move and repeat.

My head hurts constantly which isn't new (I don't want to say they're migraines because they're undiagnosed because i live in the us and the health care is shitty but apparently your head hurting so badly everyday you involuntarily sob when you wake up until you run out of tears and learn to manage the pain isn't normal... ive been dealing with these off and on since 2nd grade and all the doctors have to say is 'Dehydration' IM NOT FUCKING DEHYDRATED)

BUT BASICALLY HEAD HURTS WORSE THAN USUAL LIKE IF MY TYPICAL PAIN IS AROUND A 7/10 AND ON PAR WITH GETTING HIT REALLY REALLY HARD WITH A BASEBALL AND BASKET BALL SIMULASULY WHICH SOMEONE POKES MY SOINE WITH A PENCIL MY CURRENT EVERY DAY PAIN IS AROUND A 15/10 AND IS IMPOSSIBLE TO DECRIVE BUT KINDA FEELS LIKE THERES A 50 POUND WEIGHT ON MY HEAD AND THE BASKET BALL GOT SWAPPED WITH A IRON SKILLET AND THE PENICL WITH A RED HOT STAKE

so... not fun... AND ON TOP OF THAT IM SO TIRED I CAN BARELY FUNCTION BUT IM USED TO IT SO I JUST HAVE TO KEEP GOING LIKE PHONE YOUVE HAD FOR OVER 10 YEARS RUNNING ON 5% WITH NO STORAGE SPACE, ONLY ABLE TO CHARGE IT FOR ABOUT 5 MINS BEFORE HAVING TO DEAK WITH AND PREDICT THE GLICTHES

Anyways~ the hallucinations✨✨

So since i share a room i cant have the lights on even if im suffering through really bad isomnia episodes and im so tired i've started to hallucinate this weird figure in the corner if my room

I've named him Jamal but homie just stares at me, can't make out his face to well just that blank stare, crooked smile and broken neck.... He just watches so not a threat, jusst makes my skin crawl OH AND HE KEEPS FUCKING WITH ME LIKE JUST STANDING OVER ME AND STROBING MY VISION OR GRABBING MY FEET UNDER THE COVERS

He's the closest thing i've had to a sleep paralysis demon but the problem is he's always there... every where i go I see him...

I think he used to be in a different form, he looks the same as a nice man I used to halluicate back in 8th grade but hells thats just my subconscious

but it is funny to think that maybe that nice man died and is mad now, still watching over me but just severly flawed now

I also keep hallucinating dead people and spirts... they might not be real but they feel so real... so full of grief and hatred for the world...

I hate cemeteries

I recently found out not all people felt this way but whenever i go to cemeteries i can feel them

same at church

same at a lot of places i go to

idk im rambling now but whatever

Im so tired i just want to sleep but i cant

im genuinely so numb all i can feel is panic and uselessness

the depression's getting bad again...

Theres mold everywhere, bugs flying all around, it smells fucking awful, I smell awful, haven't showered in like 2 weeks?? been too week to

My family doesn't give a shit unless it involves me not doing the chores even tho i have finals and they're all off work/school

I genuinely told them i was going to kill myself a few years ago, none of them cared, calling me dramatic

I ODed and passed out for two days, all my dad had to say when i woke up and couldn't move was 'to get my ass up because not 'daughter' of his was going to miss church'

I also have passed out from exhaustion in front of them multiple times, they just walk over me like im a vacuum in the middle of the floor

I want to hate them so much but my need to love them just rips me apart so im just and at them constantly which is really just me being mad at myself so im stuck in this constant state of grief

I hate being so disgustingly human

I hate all other people but at the same time i was someone in bed with me rn, someone to wrap their arms around me and just fall asleep with, nothing else

Someone thats gone in the morning

Someone to be vulnerable infront of and feel so incredibly comfortable its like my clone yet doesn't remember me when we cross paths again

I want a lover just so they can die a tragic death so i have something, someone to blame my sorrow upon

Hallucinations aren't scary

The images themselves are fine, dismembered bodies, dead people, things that aren't quite human, things that want me dead... images are just that... images

and even if they came to life, i wouldn't mind, like okay they're here now... so what? I die or escape, easy.

What makes the hallucinations scary is the fact that they aren't real... its like you're conscientiousness slipping out, something you've tried so hard to keep locked down deep within your soul

slipping out

escaping

breaking free

for the souk purpose of reminding you

You aren't sane :]

You never have been

[prettybard]

So I’ve watched a ton of reactions to ofmd (indulging the ones mentioned in your post) because I was really curious to see how people responded to a show like this and I’ve observed some THINGS

• People generally don’t like/aren’t sold by ep 1 (crazy to me since it’s one of my faves and I was hooked instantly but it). Even people that liked it don’t seem to get the tone just from one ep.

• People always end up having a favorite crew member. Very fun to see who they end up gravitating towards

• Most people believe Black Pete’s stories at first/think they will be proven right later

•Most people don’t pay attention to Jim’s pronouns unless they are already aware that they are nb/are told by commenter that they are nb

• A lot of the little jokes and clever moments and line deliveries kinda go over a lot of peoples heads

• Queer people love Stede, straight people have to warm up to him

• Most people credit Taika for this show/most straight people heard about it because of his connection to it

• I’ve only seen one person previously unfamiliar with the foot touch in ep 8 notice it

• Everyone loves Lucius

• Hardly anyone notices how romantic the moonlight scene in ep 5 is (and of course the ones who pick up on it are the gays)

• This show reads much better for gay people. Like of course, but it’s interesting to actually watch the differences in reaction to a lot of moments. I mostly like to watch people who aren’t familiar with the show at all and I like to keep the mix of people (straight, queer, poc, white etc.) diverse so that I can see how people with different backgrounds respond. Queer people 100% of the time are feeling those themes and narratives.

• Everyone always loses their shit when Karl dies

• No one ever talks about how fun Geraldo is and that’s wild to me. Loved his character so much.

• End of ep 3/ep 4 is what usually hooks people

• Most people, including the straights, actually do see the kiss coming but there are a few who are still shocked

• People want to fuck Blackbeard and Jim but what else is new

• A surprising amount of people “predict” that Ed isn’t going to kill Stede because they’re going to end up friends. Like…..yeah. He’s the main character. Idk. They kinda set that up for you.

• A lot of Ed’s vulnerable moments go overlooked

• Most people can’t believe Ed leaves the dock and freak the hell out when he goes back to being Blackbeard. Very fun reactions to those things.

• Not many people point out Izzy’s attraction to Blackbeard

All this information may be completely useless but it’s really fun to observe how people respond to this show. OFMD is UNDOUBTEDLY a show for the gays but I love that by the end most straight people also highly praise and recommend the show.

omg anon i love you and im gonna try to respond to most of the points bc im v happy i got this message.

it genuinely made me so sad when ppl weren't that into the first episode, its so perfect and very easily shows the found family shit thats about to happen.

ik a lot of new people dont know about jims pronouns but by fucking god does it make me uncomfortable when ppl immediately use she/her pronouns for them,, but im glad that ppl start using it when commenters tell them abt jim.

OMG YEAH SO MANY LITTLE JOKES GO OVER PPLS HEADS AND IM JUST SCREAMING AT MY SCREEN TELLING THEM TO APPRECIATE IT ASKFJS,,, the scene where stedes like "no this is it,, thats it." THE FUCJING LINE DELIVERY ON THAT IS PERFECT BUT LIKE NO ONE MENTIONED IT

stede is for the gays,, only we can fully understand that little fucker

no bc it made me so mad that not many people credited david jenkins properly,, like its his show?!?!?!

everyone should love lucius,, hes perfect in every way

GOD I WOULD GET SO SAD WHEN MOST PPL JUST SKIMMED BY THE MOONLIGHT SCENE,, AND I DON'T THINK ILL EVER FORGET "nice , theyre friends now" HUH?!??!??!?!

i think alot of straight people just dont care, like most of the youtubers ive seen react to the show, mostly just care about the comedy and if its entertaining. it kinda shocking to me seeing ppl just act normally about the show and not completely dissect it and every single theme they can find

ahhh omg yeah idk how ppl can look at the bathtub scene with ed and just go "aww thats sad" and just dismiss it?!?! that scene changed my brain chemistry and ruined me,, ed vulnerable moments were my favorite and i really wanted more people to talk about that

oh man i feel like i can go on a whole ass rant about ed becoming the kraken,, like people say it doesn't make sense but if you just think about it for 2 fucking seconds you can see that it v much makes complete sense to his character,, hes just trying to protect himself

i like pointing out izzy's atrraction for blackbeard bc its fucking hilarious how pathetic he is for a man that barely even cared abt him and doesn't even exist (hes in love with the idea of blackbeard and but not ed)

anyways this was incredibly fun to respond to, anon!! pls send me more shit if you want <33

[castlesbyrs]

OKAY HERE ARE MY THOUGHTS I KNOW IM BIASED AND IM NOT LOOKING AT THE BIG PICTURE BUT BEAR WITH ME (heads up for spoilers obviously):

-I expected for one hour and forty five minutes to get one Cali gang scene at ep7. What a wasted opportunity aldjajdksjdudsjfhsj they could have done so many more things that were relevant to the plot I just really hope will fucking byers gets what he deserves in vol 2 because he literally knows the upside down and survived to it? Everybody names him all the time and yet he’s been reduced to a lovesick baby boy and that is not even well developed alcjakfkjsjdksbd I’m angry

-For me the season was VERY good tho, glad to see they’re back in shape after the disaster that was s3, but also as a byers family fan ofc I’m not fucking happy.

-Clearly as a Jancy shipper I’m not either akdjskfksj this was so FORCED I hated it so much it didn’t make sense at all and I don’t think people are truly going to enjoy it because it truly feels like the writers needed a last minute resort to add adolescent drama and they found no one else and were like HEY let’s bring stancy back that clearly makes sense doesn’t it? I’m scared af for Jancy tho and honestly to me it doesn’t look good for vol 2 because how are they even going to meet again if Jonathan is still like on the other side of the country, help

-BUT I do have to say this and perhaps I’m crazy but I don’t care: I actually loved every single scene Jonathan had. I KNOW it could have been a hundred more scenes instead of wasting time on the fucking basketball players and their stupid plot???? But I think Charlie did a wonderful job with every scene he got and I actually felt incredibly relieved in the sense that Jonathan’s worries about his family and university and his relationship were actually addressed and he openly confronted them (yeah his conversation with Argyle was by far my favorite scene in the season, sue me) I loved that we got once again to see his personal struggles and god we hadn’t gotten that since s1 so I have to say i enjoyed it very much.

-I wish I could say the same thing about Will. I can’t even begin to unwrap everything that’s wrong and all the wasted opportunities about the way this perfect and beautiful character is treated but… yeah, I’m angry about that.

-I very much ship byler lol and I fucking need one honest scene where I can have Jonathan and will talking about it.

-um excuse me? That dinner scene and the next day Joyce is just gone???????????????????? Are you fucking kidding me? We didn’t even get the goodbye???????????????? I’m so angry aldjdjskfjsfjiscjjdkx FUCK

-I don’t think Jonathan only got the role of comedy relief and I’m incredibly relieved about that.

-I don’t GIVE A SHIT about Stancy kajfakcjsj that will not end well just stop it I’m begging you it was weird

-I LOVE the fact Nancy will play a major role in vol 2. I need it and hopefully that will clear her brain and we’ll get some very desired Jancy angst???? Give it to me now

-Argyle was another wasted opportunity Jesus I’m so angry akgjsjfks

-I won’t talk about Russia but I did cry a lot when Hop and Joyce reunited ❤️ at least there’s hope somewhere. Also that scene of hop in prison? His monologue? I loved it and I’m so glad they learned from that awful treatment of his character in s3

-I literally don’t care about anything else I just need the byers and mike of course to play an important role in vol 2 but there’s only two episodes left so I think it won’t happen and I’m like so tired???????

-anyway aside from that I TRULY enjoyed this season and I think it was a huge leap forward from s3. I enjoyed the overall plot, I think it was better thought out for certain that s3, it will never top the iconicness of s2 and s1 for me but it comes close in a sense.

-i truly don’t have predictions nor theories for vol 2 and honestly I’m done predicting because I’m always wrong. I just expect something… anything… for the Byers.

Anyway… had to put my thoughts somewhere.

[someonestolemyshoes]

Hi! Have u done any pregnant Hanji and overprotective daddy Levi already?? Yep i think im craving for more domestic levihan family, im sorry 😭

Im a bit new here in the community, and when i read ur works, i fell in love with it already, thank you for existing!!! 💖💖💖

Hello anon! Thank you so much, I’m so glad you enjoyed my other fics :3 Sorry for the very long wait for this one, I've been struggling to find the time/motivation to write lately, but I'm feeling a little better and I figured I'd get to work on some of my prompts. Starting here!!

It ended up a little less domestic and a touch more angsty than I had originally planned, but only for a moment--happy endings all round! 

Warning: this does start off with non-graphic depictions of nausea/vomiting, I hope that doesn't bother you!

Hange had been feeling unwell for days.

It wasn't an uncommon occurrence—Hange tended to wake up feeling nauseous some days, most often when she'd neglected to eat a decent meal the evening before—but this was the fourth morning in a row now, that Hange found herself bent over the toilet bowl in the early hours of the morning, heaving up nothing but acid and empty air. 

She retched until her stomach ached. There was nothing left to bring up, but her gut still rolled unpleasantly and there was a telling tremor under her tongue that warned her it might be best to stay in the bathroom a little while longer. She settled heavily against the wall to catch her breath.

It didn't make any sense. For most of the day, Hange felt fine. A little tired, maybe, but that was only to be expected after spending half the night every night on the bathroom floor. Tonight, no doubt, would follow the uncomfortably familiar routine: Hange would dry-heave a little longer, until the queasiness abated enough for Levi to convince her to come back to bed, and then she would toss and turn, too warm beneath the bed clothes, until she could fall into a restless sleep. She'd wake up feeling a little groggy, a little bleary, unreasonably hungry, but after a coffee and some breakfast she would feel well again. Perfectly normal.

Like clockwork, Levi appeared in the doorway just as Hange had flopped herself back over the toilet. She felt his palm, cool and soft, press against the back of her neck. Hange gathered her hair back from her face with both hands, braced her elbows on the toilet bowl, letting out a groan of discomfort as her stomach twisted, threatened to revolt again. Levi's thumb rubbed soothingly against her neck.

Sure enough, she brought up nothing more, but she gagged plenty, and found herself gasping for breath by the time she leaned back against Levi, aching and exhausted. His lips pressed into her damp hair.

Levi was as silent as always. His touch was pleasant, his presence welcome. Hange needed the hand he offered to pull her to her feet, needed his reassuring grip at her hips as she brushed her teeth and rinsed her mouth out. Her quaking knees felt unstable beneath her. 

He lay facing her after they got into bed. Hange was sprawled out atop the covers, shifting restlessly to find the coolest patches on the bed. Levi watched her for a moment, then said, "This isn't normal."

Hange only grumbled.

"You said you'd book an appointment with the doctor."

Hange grumbled again. Levi ticked his tongue and rolled to lie on his back, staring at the ceiling.

"Call tomorrow."

"If I didn't know better," Hange said sluggishly, "I'd say you were worried about me."

He scowled and rolled onto his other side, his back to her now.

"No, just sick of waking up at half four every morning to drag you back to bed."

Hange managed a small, wicked snicker, but shuffled across the space between them and pressed an apologetic kiss to the back of his neck.

"Must be dreadful," she said. Her voice sounded raw, hoarse. She buried her nose into his hair and took a long, deep breath. Levi grunted, but reached back and pulled her arm loosely over his hip. He knotted their fingers together loosely.

"Call them, Hange."

Hange gave his fingers a gentle, reassuring squeeze.

"I will."

**

Hange prided herself on being a reasonably intelligent person. She had two degrees, was working towards her doctorate, and already had her name on a small handful of peer-reviewed research papers. She spoke multiple languages, read dissertations for fun, kept a (in Levi’s words) disgustingly realistic human skeleton in a box under the bed for study purposes, and had spent the better part of the last 26 years of her life studying human biology and physiology.  

How she had not predicted that she might be pregnant was almost unfathomable. 

She left the doctors office in a daze with an appointment card and several pamphlets in hand. She had been referred hastily to a midwife and the hospital would soon be sending out a date for an ultrasound—“As soon as possible,” the doctor had said, “since you’re not sure how far along you are.” 

The thing is, Hange had been on the same birth control pill for years now. Forgetful as she may be about many, many things (like eating, and bathing, and washing the dishes and taking out the garbage and and and), Hange was religious in taking that damn pill at the same time every single day. She had never missed it, not even once. Without a regular cycle, Hange had no way of predicting when they had conceived, and the doctor was eager to make sure no essential landmarks in her antenatal care were missed, if they could possibly help it.

The thought had never even crossed her mind. It seemed ridiculous now, in hindsight. The sickness was one thing, but now that she thought about it, there were a whole host of small oddities that Hange could easily attribute to pregnancy. Lethargy, and bloating, heartburn, and she had been peeing more than usual—Hange groaned, and scrubbed her hands over her face. She should have suspected, at least. Should have put the pieces together sooner. 

But, stupid and naive as it may be, she hadn’t thought it possible. Why worry about it, when Hange had taken consistent precautions to avoid it? 

She felt queasy the entire bus ride home. 

It wasn’t that she was against the idea of having children. One day, maybe. When she had finished her doctorate, got herself a steady, well-paid job. When she and Levi had moved out of their tiny, cramped apartment into somewhere bigger, somewhere more suited for a family. 

And god. Levi. 

This was something they’d never really talked about. For his part, Levi never seemed all that interested. He was good with Hange’s nieces and nephews, and Erwin’s son adored him, and he hadn’t showed any express dislike for children, but—well, tolerating other peoples little brats and raising your own are two very different things. 

What if Levi didn’t want the baby? What if he did? Hange wasn’t even sure herself what she wanted to do about the whole situation—what if she didn’t want it? What if, after some reflection, Hange decided now wasn’t a good time? Could they even afford a baby right now? Hange’s money was tied up in her education, while Levi was just making ends meet at the office. They got by well enough with just the two of them, but add in a baby? A whole other person, entirely dependant on them for support? Hange could barely feed and bathe herself, some days, never mind responsibly care for a child. 

By the time the bus pulled up near the house, Hange felt more distressed than ever. Levi, at least, was at work until the evening, so she had a few more hours to herself to mull everything over, but the entire situation made her stomach clench and churn unpleasantly with every new thought. 

The prospect of having a child was terrifying. The prospect of not having this child was nauseating. 

Levi had left the flat in pristine condition when he had left for work, but Hange barely had the energy to feel even a little guilty as she shrugged off her coat and kicked off her shoes, leaving both strewn about the floor. She dumped her bag and made her way sluggishly through to the bedroom. 

Levi had made the bed. The sheet was stretched flat over the mattress, the pillows perfectly fluffed and set against the headboard. Hange’s nightshirt, one of Levi’s old, baggy shirts, too stretched and threadbare for him to wear, had been folded neatly and left on her side of the bed, her slippers lined up smartly with the bed frame. For some reason—hormones, she told herself—her eyes watered, and a lump swelled in her throat. She sniffled pitifully as she stripped off her clothes and pulled on the shirt, clambering into the bed and tugging the sheets until the cocooned around her. 

Hange passed the rest of the day tossing and turning in bed. She tried to nap, but her mind was too restless, occupied with thoughts of the baby, with the concept of having to tell Levi when he came home. She could try to lie, say the doctors had done some blood work, that she was waiting on the results of some test or other, but Levi knew her too well. She could never lie to him, and her despondent state would give her away before she had the chance to say anything. 

The sun was beginning to set by the time she heard Levi’s keys in the door. She felt exhausted, head aching with all the thinking, considering, weighing up her options; with running over every possible outcome she could imagine. Keeping the baby, getting rid of the baby, Levi not wanting the baby, Levi leaving over the baby—every scenario she could imagine was worse than the last. There was only one idea that she had hardly dared entertain, in fear of disappointment if things didn’t work out. 

She heard Levi call out for her, but gave no answer. She listened, curled up in a ball on her side, as he shuffled around, no doubt picking up her coat and shoes from where she had abandoned them. And then he made his way towards the bedroom, steps soft on the plush carpet. The bedroom door creaked open. 

“Hange?” 

She made a small, warbled noise under the bedclothes. Levi came to sit on the bed, the mattress dipping beneath his weight. His hand found the curve of Hange’s hip. 

“How was it?” 

Hange made another noncommittal sound. She wiped her nose and eyes on the sheets, but didn’t dare show her face just yet. She wasn’t ready. She had never prepared for this conversation, never even imagined it before today. It was too soon. Not enough time to rehearse. 

Levi’s hand moved to her back, rubbing lightly up and down her spine, before dropping to the mattress behind her. He leaned over her, and she felt his lips press warm and gentle to the point of her shoulder. A fresh wave of tears poured over the bridge of her nose and down the side of her face. 

She tried to be quiet, but something—the shake of her shoulder, perhaps, or the shudder of air as she tried to take a steadying breath in—gave way to her crying. Levi moved off the bed, but Hange felt his fingers prying lightly at the sheets, pulling them down until he could get a good look at her face. He was kneeling by the bed now, face level with her, and he looked at her with worry pinching deep creases between his brows. 

“Oi, what’d they say?” 

Hange bit the inside of her lip and rubbed her damp cheek on the pillow. If Levi was bothered by her using their bedding as a tissue, he didn’t show it. He simply looked at her, eyes darting over her face, searching. It occurred to Hange then how this must look to him. She had gone to the doctors due to unexplained, violent sickness, and now she is in bed, hours later, still crying about whatever news she had received. 

“I’m fine,” she said. Levi’s tense shoulders relaxed a fraction, but his face remained pinched, frowning and concerned. Hange wanted to tell him quickly, simply, like ripping off a plaster, but the words would not come. She opened her mouth, but her throat constricted painfully. 

Eventually, she said, “my bag. There’s some stuff in my bag. Have a look.” 

Levi gave her a somewhat quizzical look, but stood, dropping a quick kiss to her temple before going to fetch the bag, and dipping his hand in to fish out the contents inside. 

Hange watched with her breath held and her stomach clenched as Levi pulled out the handful of leaflets and turned them over, looking at each one in turn. His eyes widened fractionally as comprehension dawned on him. His lips pressed into a thin line. Leaden weight settled in Hange’s gut. She curled into a tighter ball, pressing the bedsheets over her mouth and nose, waiting for him to gather himself enough to say something. 

After a moment, he spoke. 

“That’s all?” 

Huh? “Huh?!” 

Hange disentangled her arms from the sheets and sat up, staring at him. Levi moved to sit on the edge of the bed again, a scowl back on his face, though there was an intriguing flush high on his cheeks as he whacked her lightly on the top of the head with the leaflets. 

“Stupid four-eyes,” he said, exasperated. “Crying like that. I thought you were dying.”  

“I’m pregnant.” Hange said the word slowly, carefully, in case Levi had somehow misunderstood. He had the audacity to look at her like she was stupid.

“I can see that.” 

“And you have nothing more to say about it? That’s all?” 

Levi shrugged a little at her. Aside from the small patches of colour in his cheeks, Levi seemed wholly unfazed by the revelation. 

“It’s just a baby. We can handle a baby.” 

“That doesn’t terrify you?” 

Levi scrutinised her for a moment, before he said, “are you scared?” 

“Yes? Yes! How are you so calm? We can’t afford a baby—we don’t have the time for a baby? Where will they going to sleep? We don’t have a spare room. Can we get time off work to take care of a baby? How will we pay for childcare when we can’t be around?” 

“Hange,” Levi said, putting a stop to her rambling. He watched her with a pinched stare. “Do you not want it?” 

Hange had spent the majority of the day mulling over this same question. Staring a family was a huge, life-changing commitment, something that required  careful forethought and planning. They had not had that luxury. Hange was pregnant now. She had doubts and fears, more than she could ever express, but the idea of simply having a baby—of having this baby—wasn’t upsetting. In the small, brief moments she had allowed herself to imagine a future where she and Levi were parents, where they weren’t wanting for money or time, where things were well, she felt happy. Giddy. The prospect was almost exciting. 

“It’s not that,” Hange said earnestly. “I do—I’ve been thinking about it all day, and I—I do want it. But I just—we had no time to prepare. We have no savings, we have no space, I’m a mess. How are we supposed to take care of a tiny person? Babies are hard work, Levi.”

“You’re already hard work.” 

Hange laughed weakly, and wiped at her face again. Levi pressed a kiss to her raw cheek. 

“We’ll figure it out,” he said.

Hange leaned into him, sighing quietly. 

“Is this the kind of thing we can just figure out?” 

Levi hummed, shrugging his shoulder. His fingers skimmed up beneath Hange’s shirt, splaying over the small of her back and pulling her closer. 

“Why not? We’ve done a good job bullshitting our way through everything else.”  

Hange laughed lightly and bumped the side of her head against Levi’s.  

“This is different, Levi. This is a person. A tiny little person who is going to need me and you to do everything for them. What if we can’t do it? What if we mess up?” 

“Hange.” Levi pulled back a little and his hands came up to grip either side of her face, forcing her to look at him. “Stop. I know all that. But if you want the brat, and I want the brat, we’ve got no choice but to get on with it.” 

“I know, I know, but—wait, you want the baby?” 

Levi maintained eye contact with her, but it seemed to take a concentrated effort to do so. The flush of his cheeks deepened a little and his lips quirked at the corners. No doubt to compensate for the show of emotion, he pulled his face into his customary frown. 

“It’s fine,” he said. Hange fought the urge to roll her eyes and caught his hands as he lowered them from her face, pulling them into her lap. 

“Are you saying that because it’s already too late, or do you want to keep it?” 

Levi’s face took on a look of constipated strain. He curled his lip as though in distaste, then hooked a hand around the back of Hange’s neck and pulled her face to his abruptly, smacking a kiss to her lips. He let his forehead settle against hers and stroked his thumb over the hinge of her jaw. 

He fought to keep his tone neutral, but Hange could hear the happy tremor in his voice as he said again, “It’s fine.”

For the first time since hearing the news that day, Hange allowed herself to feel excited. To accept the idea that she and Levi were about to start their own bizarre little family. That Levi was still with her felt incredible enough, but to know that he was pleased—it was more than she could ever have hoped for. Hange gave a wet laugh and kissed him again. 

“Are you allergic to looking happy?” Hange asked as they broke apart. Levi clicked his tongue and pulled back to flick her square between the eyebrows. She laughed a little louder and leaned to wipe her runny nose on his shoulder. Levi muttered under his breath, but didn’t push her away.  

“Okay,” Hange said, after a moment. She sat back and pushed her hair back from her face. “Okay. We’re having a baby, then.” 

Levi’s rubbed the smile from his lips with the back of his hand, nodding. “We’re having a baby.” 

Hange sunk down to flop back over the pillows. Levi looked down at her, head tilted, chewing the inside of his lip. Hange reached up to brush his fringe off his forehead, warmth spilling in her chest when he held her hand close and turned to kiss her palm. 

She smiled a little playfully, and freed a leg from the sheets to dig her toes into his ribs. 

“If I’d known you wanted kids I would have been significantly less stressed, you know.” 

Levi quirked a brow at her. 

“I’ve told you that before.” 

“No, you haven’t.” 

“I have. At your sisters wedding.” 

Hange racked her brain, searching for the conversation. She remembered the occasion, and she remembered that she and Levi had somehow ended up babysitting Hange’s family brood. She remembered Levi, wrestling to keep her youngest nephew on his lap while the eldest, still only five or six at the time, was clambering up the back of his chair, sticky hands tugging at Levi’s collar. Hange fought hard to recall more of what was said, but could remember nothing at all of Levi announcing that he had wanted one of his own. 

“You said these brats aren’t so bad,” Hange said slowly. 

Levi nodded at her. Hange waited for him to elaborate, but he didn’t, only looked at her like there was nothing more he needed to say. 

“That’s it? That’s your idea of telling me you want kids?” 

“The hell else could I have meant?” 

Hange dug her toe at him again but Levi caught her foot this time, pushing it firmly down onto the mattress. Hange reached for him with both arms instead, curling them around the back of his neck and tugging him down quickly. He toppled over her with a quiet oof, and Hange rolled them quickly, straddling his waist and dropping her weight down onto him. 

“That is the kind of thing you say clearly, Levi! These brats aren’t so bad—you’re ridiculous!” 

Levi wrestled with her arms a little longer before giving up and bringing his hands instead to rest low on her hips. He watched her with a curious expression on his face, something open and soft, and then his eyes roved down to her abdomen and his thumbs brushed inwards, beneath the hem of her shirt, stroking over her lower belly. 

This time, he didn’t fight his smile. 

He reached up and pulled her down by the neck, and kissed her soundly. Hange melted against him, welcomed the press of his tongue between her lips, shuddered pleasantly when he nipped at her bottom lip. She went with him willingly as he rolled them both over, nudging a knee between her legs and settling his weight against her. 

She was spreading her legs to make space for him, when he paused suddenly, and pulled back, leaning over the bed and scooping through the discarded back of leaflets. Hange, winded and dishevelled, watched him incredulously as he flicked through the contents of one, then tossed it aside and opened another. 

“What are you doing?” 

Without looking up, Levi replied, “Checking.” 

“Checking what?” 

“I wanna know if we can still—” he waved a hand between them, and went back to searching. 

“We’ve been—” Hange mimicked his gesture, “—up until now anyway.” 

Levi looked up at her, looking mildly horrified. He held up one his open leaflet and said, “You’ve been drinking alcohol, too. You’re not supposed to do that. And look, here—you’re not supposed to overwork. You’ll have to take on less hours at the university. And you’ll eat. Proper damn meals. Every day.” 

Hange flopped back against the pillows, eyes rolling, watching as Levi picked up each new leaflet in turn, pointing out every little adjustment that Hange would have to make. 

“This one says you should get eight to ten hours sleep per night. Every night. And not so much coffee, the caffeine’s bad for the baby.” 

The baby. It sounded surreal. It sounded ridiculous. Levi shifted to sit against the headboard beside her after opening the chunky little What to Expect While Expecting volume Hange had been handed while leaving the doctors. He seemed thoroughly engrossed, and seemingly unaware when one of his hands reached out to pull Hange’s hair free of its ponytail and sink into her hair. She hummed happily as his nails scraped over her scalp. 

Things were still scary, and Hange was still uncertain about how this whole adventure might turn out. But Levi was still with her, and Levi was happy, and that—

—Well, that was good enough. 

[souichioneshots]

Souichi x Spanish!Reader

Disclaimer: SPANISH and English Mixed

I love the idea of Souichi picking up on the Spanish words i use daily, so i decided to write a super self-indulging fic on what that might be like if we were actually dating. 

I purposely wrote his lines really weird in Spanish for 1 specific reason. 

⊛Japanese people have a tough time pronouncing L’s because its not in their vocabulary! Instead all L’s are pronounced as R’s! ⊛

I wrote this super fast after class, so im sure there's a lot of misspells. probs both in english and spanish lol. 

I also had a tough time trying to write in a way that showed that Souichi was unfamiliar with Spanish. But i tried my best. Hope its understandable. 

(btw the Spanish used is specifically from latin american slang, so i apologize if it means something else in the Spanish you know)

Dating a foreigner is tough. That’s what Souichi parents told him when they found out you 2 were dating.

They tried to warn him that food you ate might not be his taste, or that the way the people of your country greet one another might be a bit too much intense for an antisocial like Souichi. But since you were more interested in assimilating into Souichi’s culture, you 2 never really seemed to have a problem with any of these things.  

However, truth be told, during the time he’s been with you, there was one problem that never seemed to go away. The language barrier.

Although you both were able to have a normal conversation in the same language, there were times when you would switch back to your mother-tongue.

For example, whenever you would get angry and curse. Instead of using words Souichi would understand, your mind would suddenly switch back into Spanish, making you use words like ‘Coño’ or ‘Puta’.

Souichi had literally no idea what any of those words meant, but they sounded kind of funny, and since these words could be easily pronounced in Japanese, Souichi would often practice saying them in his free time.

Like when he had gotten caught mid-curse by his older brother. Instead of cursing at him in Japanese like always, he used the word ‘puta’ to confuse him. Ultimately giving Souichi a sense of pride for being able to speak in a language no one in his family understood. 

Of course, there were times when you would use clean-words from your mother tongue as well. Specially whenever you were feeling very affectionate.

Souichi quickly understood the meaning of ‘Hola’ and ‘Gracias’, but there was one phrase that he couldn’t figure out for the life of him.

‘Bebé lindo’.

Every time you 2 would meet up, you would yell this at him.

He’s asked you to explain it multiple times, but you insisted that it would be better if he didn’t understand. However, Souichi would not accept that kind of answer. If you were going to speak in a language that almost no one around you understood, then he wanted to be apart of it as well. 

That’s why he decided that today he would greet you the exact same way you did to him. This way, if it was something offensive, he would be able to tell immediately by your body language. 

Souichi listened carefully as a pair familiar sounding footsteps approached his room. As soon as the door slide open, you put your hand high up in the air and exclaimed “Hola, mi bebé lindo~!”

That was his cue.

“Ola, me bebe rindo!”

A quizzical expression formed on your face as Souichi responded back in a language other than English.

Finally piecing the puzzle together, you laughed through your nose.  

“What’s so funny?” Souichi asked, now feeling even more confused as to what that phrase might actually mean.

“You got masculine and feminine mixed up. I’m a girl, so you would need to call me ‘Linda’ not ‘Lindo’.”

“Oh, I see. So, I’m ‘me bebe rindo’ and you’re ‘me bebe rinda’”?

“Yes.” Your cheeks suddenly turned rosy-pink as you realized what he had just called you.

“I mean no! Hehe... D-Don’t call me that.” You put your arms in an X-formation, trying to express how much you didn’t want Souichi to use that phrase. 

“So, it does mean something nasty!” Souichi said with confidence. 

“No, no. It doesn’t mean anything nasty. It actually means... ‘cute’...‘baby’.” You put your face in your hands, trying to hide how embarrassed you were feeling right now. “It’s a phrase commonly used by people who are dating...”

Souichi brought his hand up to his chin. It all made sense now. If this were any other case, he wouldn’t appreciate being called something as defenseless and pathetic as a baby, but at least it was better than the other bad words he had previously predicted it might mean.

“Well, now I see why you only say in Spanish. If I were to call you ‘my cute baby’ in English, I’m pretty sure my grandpa would come back from the grave just to cringe. Haha.” A evil grin spread across Souchi’s face as he looked upon your still extremely-flushed demeanor.

“But since I do wanna try using Spanish more, from now on, I think I’ll call you ‘me bebe rinda’~.”

“Ahh!! No no no!! No nicknames!! No more Spanish!!”

Souichi laughed as covered your ears, trying your hardest to block out his half-joking utterances. Even though you were used to speaking in an affectionate way, you were still super shy when it came to receiving it back.

It seemed like this little language problem you 2 had would now become a new weapon Souichi could torture you with.