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numerousbees1106 · 1 year ago

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Answering this in numerical order:

1. 70 works! (And more on the way, eventually)

2. 387K 😳

3. These days, I write exclusively Star Wars, mostly the prequel trilogy with a little bit of the original trilogy. I used to write a bunch of marvel stuff, too, but I’ve kinda edged out of that fandom.

4. Top five fics by kudos are, in order:

Shuri Squad Plus Like Everyone (Marvel, 2019, 837 kudos), Cracks in the Wall (Star Wars, 2020, 810 kudos), He Swam Through Black Foam (Star Wars, 2022, 806 kudos), On The Wings of Yesterday (Star Wars, 2021, 556 kudos), and finally Quote Midas, “The Past Comes Back To Haunt” (Star Wars, 2022, 556 kudos)

5. I always do my best to respond to comments, for a multitude of reasons. One, it feels amazing to interact with people who read and enjoyed your fic. Two, it’s good to answer questions or respond to predictions that readers have, as it makes the reader feel more connected to the work and more likely to enjoy it and return to it. Three, it boosts the reader’s perception of you as a writer, giving them the impression that you are an approachable member of the community who will gladly interact with anyone who wants to, which generally makes you more likable and more recognizable in your fandom/community. And finally, and a little selfishly, if you’re responding to every comment, that makes the number of comments go way up, driving engagement and making it more likely that someone new will stumble upon and read your fic.

6. Honestly, I don’t think I can answer this one. Angst is kinda like my bread and butter, my staple storymode. Almost all of them are really angsty in different ways. Some of the especially angsty ones are Wastelands, Falling so Slow and its partner piece Like Fragile, Tiny Shells, On The Wings of Yesterday, I Always Lose No Matter What and its sequel Rabbit Teeth, Claimed By The Greedy Jaws of Fate and Time, and pretty much the entirety of my Leaves From The Vine series.

7. It depends on ‘happiest’. If you’re speaking in the traditional sense, then probably AO3 Shitposting. If you’re speaking in the “NumerousBees’ idea of a happy story” I.e very bittersweet and leaving you in tears by the end of it, then I Cannot Give Anymore and I Fear What I See are the fics that immediately come to mind. I suppose He Swam Through Black Foam is also technically a happy ending, but honestly I wouldn’t call it ‘happy’.

8. No, I’ve found that the community on AO3 is very kind, welcoming, and supportive. Even when I was just starting out (all the way back in 2018! I’ve grown so much since then!) everyone was super nice and supported me as I progressed in my skill. I’m truly honored to be a part of this community, and I’m super lucky to have been able to take my baby steps on a site full of amazingly wonderful people who encouraged me to keep writing even when I was awful at it.

9. Yes, I do write smut, though recently I’ve started putting the more explicit stuff on my pseud, LavenderGhost.

10. If you’re talking about fandom crossovers, then no - I’ve never really been a fan of those. The one exception was the RotTMNT x AtLA crossover I read a few months ago, that was fucking baller. Hope it updates soon.

11. Not that I’m aware of, no.

12. No, unless I’m having a Moment and am forgetting, but I’m pretty positive that I’ve never had a fic translated.

13. No, I’ve never co-written a fic, though i had briefly negotiated with someone to see if that was something we wanted to do, but ultimately we realized we had our own ideas and went our separate ways.

14. Honestly, Vader x Piett snuck its way into my heart when I wasn’t looking. There’s so much POTENTIAL. There’s so much TENSION. It’s great :)

15. I should probably finish On The Wings of Yesterday at some point, but unfortunately I’ve kinda written myself into a corner with that one and might just end up abandoning it, but I might come back to it someday. My Leaves From The Vine series has been on the back-burner for a while now, and so has Lavender. I have a bunch of WIPs in my docs to work on, and I’m currently working on this one piece that I’ve been writing on and off since 2020. Hopefully that will be coming soon.

16. My biggest strength is probably my creativity, followed by my very stylistic approach to writing. One of my friends told me that I exemplify why writing is considered an artform and I’ve been riding that high since.

17. Actually finishing a story. I’ve found that if I plan too far ahead in my story I’ll lose the motivation to actually write it (because it already exists in my head, why would I write it down, or something like that). I have to let it come naturally and just let it write itself.

18. Fun in theory, stressful in practice.

19. Marvel, specifically Spider-Man

20. Hard to choose, and it varies depending on my mood. I’m very proud of how Wastelands turned out, and of my more recent works I Fear What I See is pretty good. Some of my other favorites are This Sick And Twisted Jealousy, Quote Cain, “I Didn’t Mean For This To Happen”, and It Will Never Be Worth It. My favorite work that never really got any traction was Follow Blind Determination, and my favorite Marvel work is probably In The Pines.

@husborth

If anyone wants the links to any of these works, just ask and you shall receive. I’m on mobile right now and it’s a pain in the ass to embed a link otherwise I’d just do it now.

20 Questions For Writers

Wow, thank you so much for the tag @fanfictasia !! I've wanted to participate in something like this forever!! 🎶✨️✨️

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Right now? 66.

"Yes, as a star wars writer, I am very proud of that. No, I do not intend to change it anytime soon."

I really need to focus on (and finish) some of my WIPs, and that mean trying not to disperse my energy amidst one shots (no matter how much i love monthly challenges and fic exchange events). Also I'm very proud of that 66 count and want to appreciate it xd.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

321k words!!

(More or less 100k / year 🎶 little me would never believe that 0.0

My school exam results sure don't, with how they are dropping 🤣)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Star wars mostly (Vaderkin or my OC Sinvulkt), then Marvel (Dr Strange), Dream SMP (Dream), Le Visiteur du Future (Renard) and more recently Batman (Bruce Wayne) as well as Avatar: the last airbender (Zuko).

Plus the original stories I am supposed to write but almost never end up doing xd (the engagement in fandom compared to original stories make the switch hard xd).

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

1. Dreamt of a Never Ending Sky (Dream SMP)

669 kudos

2. To Fly Free Under The Morning Sun (Star Wars)

480 kudos

3. On the Edge of Twilight (Star Wars)

380 kudos

4. Scales of Embers (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

353 kudos

5. Crash Landing on Space Australia (Star Wars)

319 kudos

I'll never know how my Dream SMP fic got so much engagement. Good timing at a moment the fandom was in effervescence, I guess. Scales of Embers scoring so high is also a surprise 0.0. I discovered it had that many kudos today. It’s a shame the Dr Strange fandom is small because I think my Dr Strange WIP What If Doctor Strange Lost His Humanity ? would have deserved a place here. It definitely does in my heart.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to! As a reader, I always feel super happy when the author shows that they’ve read and appreciated my comments. I know that personality an author who answers make me more likely to want to drop a comment.

As an author, I absolutely want to show how much I love every single comments, so I try to answer them all. But I get a little overwhelmed sometimes, bcs lots of other stuff going on irl or another reason. As such, it can happen that I don't feel the energy to answer a comment on the spot. And if I don't answer it on the spot (using the power of the wiggy dizzy nice happy feeling of getting a comment), I don't necessarily have the energy to answer later on. I currently have something like 60 unanswered comments I think? TT.TT

But rest assured that whether I answered or not, I absolutely adore and cherish every single ones!! Comments are amazing! ✨️.✨️

(This kind of engagement is one of the only reason I managed to settle into such an active rythm of writing after years of trying then dropping the hobby~)

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Glance at my fics.

Uhhh... This is a hard question here... Many of them have angsty endings XD

Mostly the ones at the beginning (the worst written ones xd). I wonder why~

Also a lot of them don' have endings yet XD

I'll say amidst the 'old' fics from 2021, Day 8 - Screaming (Star Wars) would be the angstier one (or most horrible one ig xd).

But as far as recent fic go... While I haven't finished writing it bcs its wordcount exploded in my face, I already plotted / drafted it a few months ago and I know the ending, so I'll choose:

Batman’s Downfall (To Stand Alone) (Batman)

I noticed my kind of angst doesn’t have much success around these parts 🫠🤣. Oh well. I cherish it all the same :3.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Sometimes I think I wrote too many fics. It's hard to select one.

Uhhh... My fluffiest works are one shots in Of Feathers and Freedom serie, but they are part of the series so it’s not really an 'ending'.

...

I'll answer for the crackiest story rather than the happiest ending bcs all my finished fics ending are ominous open ending at best xd.

The Blob Adventures Of Excentrics Jedi (Star Wars)

Because it's cute blob drawings of our crazy team of OC in taaoej, and I love them (although we are all angst lovers in taaoej, so it's more crack-angst, and we don't know the ending bcs there isn't really one. Not yet at least. Hopefully never).

8. Do you get hate on your fic?

Just my own innervoice as far as I'm aware. But then I've always been rather clueless when people tried to 'hate on me'. The message usually just got lost somewhere in dreamspace immensity, never computing.

I've found the fandoms communities really welcoming at the very least!!

9. Do you write smut?

No.

I don't really enjoy reading smut. Nor romance for the matter. I don't think I'd enjoy writing it.

But maybe I'll try one day, for the sake of experimenting all genres.

10. Do you write crossovers?

I never did. I don't know why. Maybe I just never felt the need to mix characters and universes. There are amazing crossovers out there though, so who knows, maybe one day I'll try one.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of. In all honesty, I don't think my works are nearly popular enough to get stolen xd.

My writing style isn’t that good yet, and my dislike of romance when the majority of the fandom community is ship-powered means I end up in a corner quite niche. (A corner I love, that being said. Yay Crack, Angst and Gen~)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but maybe I'll translate some of mine in french someday. Be it only so that I do write fiction in my native language from time to time.

Anyone that wanna translate my fics, feel free to!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Yes, To Fly Free Under The Morning Sun (Star Wars)!!

I’m still waiting for my co-author @purpleopossum to come back to me / get back in star wars mood to continue that one. 🫠

Can’t say my hopes are that high up after all this time, but it’s the redemption | healing part of the serie and I don’t really have fun writing alone redemption | healing part... i prefer doing the whole mayhem that create the injury in the first place. And with how long some of my fics hiatus are (and I got no excuse for those xd), it’s only fair for me to wait. (I did write more other works for the dragon Vader serie in the meantime xd).

I made an oath to myself to never leave a work unfinished though, so we’ll see. If in several years purple still doesn’t wish to continue it, or if she inform me she is dropping the story, I’ll try to make some kind of ending. It’s part of the game i guess.

Alternatively, the The Amazing Adventures Of Excentrics Jedi universe is a group of star wars OCs that we made together with @pat-the-togorian , @asteral-feileacan , @ct2002-rema and Xylian. I don’t know if that count as co-writing? We usually write our OCs pov.

But in all cases, co-writting is very fun and I’d definitely do it again if other opportunities arise in the future.

14. What‘s your all-time favourite ship?

The absence of ship is my all-time favorite ship. Otherwise, "main character / digging their own grave" would be my 'favorite ship' since I tend to synch with idiots snarky jerks disasters.

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

To Fly Free Under The Morning Sun (Star Wars) that I mentioned for question 13? 🤣

More seriously, I'll answer On the Edge of Twilight (Star Wars)

Because it's my vent fic. I know the main plot line, I vaguely know the current arc, but no one can predict where the next arc will go. It's all pure impulse and while I have a vague idea of 'ending', I refuse to plan a path towards it. This fic specifically, I want to keep pure impulse. So I'd love for it to become some kind of "The NeverEnding Story". :3

16. What’s your writing strengths?

I write.

No seriously, it's not something I did four years ago appart from vent poems here and there. Writing is in itself a huge writing strenght!

Otherwise I'm also a bottomless well of idea. It's pretty neat.

17. What’s your writing weaknesses?

... romance?

Or dialogues. Lastly I have a lot of frustration around the transition from dialogue / transition / dialogue. I feel like I'm crap at properly timing that.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

It's fun. I do it for games sometimes. Since apparently writing normally is not chllenging enough for my brain sometimes. It did teach me bits of mando'a.

Recently for Sēċan (Star Wars) I decided last minute to put the whole droid dialogue in morse, and I regret none of it.

I'm usually only doing it for one shots though, and never 'official existing' languages until now.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Star wars :p

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Now that's another hard question, how am I supposed to select one.

I'm gonna answer the whole Of Feathers And Freedom (Star Wars) serie. Bcs wings. :3

Tag time~ (if you wish to)

@purpleopossum @pat-the-togorian @cinderfeather @beguilewritesstuff @purple-iris @dreaminghour @ravenite-void @trickstress333 @bluntblade @doctorgeekery @stewardofningishzida @jenae-0 @trickstress333 @kittonafoxgirl @pastelcourage @salparadiselost @kefalion @charlottevader @ravenstakeflight @starr234 @aelaer @sarcasticfirefighter @mckiwi @linzerj @sonderwalker @exomal @tonhalszendvics @nephilimswitchlight @firejay112 @only-here-for-the-star-wars @ajedilikehisfather @makaronik @chickadeechickadoo @dirtkid123 @numerousbees1106 @akizumy @25centsoda @udekai @wendingways @silvereddaye @in-company-of-misery @wisechaosglitter @kuraiarcoiris @alright-anakin @wyvunn you're more than welcome to join on the interview fun!! (Or to ignore the tagging if not interested xd).

I know I tagged. I lot of people. Some of you may recognise my pseud, some may not. But I thought it would be interesting to hear the answer of the various authors with whom I interacted on ao3 over the years, so I went and digged up those with tumblr I could find from my inbox 🤣

(Hopefully I didn’t bother any of you >.< - otherwise I apologize. Same for if I accidentally tagged a non-writer.)

I'd love to hear your answers! 🎶

#ask game #tag game #tagging game #20 questions #20 questions for writers #ao3 #ao3 author

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paigeschapterbook · 3 years ago

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LTWT 2022 inspired works: Day #3

Day 1: Just Hold On ✔️

Day 2: Back to You ✔️

Day 3: Just Like You ✔️

Day 4: Miss You

Day 5: Kill My Mind

Day 6: Don’t Let It Break Your Heart

Day 7: Two of Us

Day 8: We Made It

Day 9: Too Young

Day 10: Walls

Day 11: Habit

Day 12: Always You

Day 13: Fearless

Day 14: Perfect Now

Day 15: Defenceless

Day 16: Only the Brave

Day 17: Copy of a Copy of a Copy

Day 18: Change

16 days to Louis Tomlinson’s first show for LTWT = 16/01/2022

Poems inspired by solo artist Louis Tomlinson’s 18 songs:

Day / Song #3:

Just Like You - released 12 October 2017

It comes for you, the same as it does for me

Can you see?

Do you see?

We are the same inside,

fragile with humanity

- search for our strength in that humanity,

we could both do that

(You won’t)

So why can you not see

- standing before you small and aching in that moment

but that moment does not define me -

why can you not see the

similarities?

Are the differences really all you

notice?

It waits for you, just as it waits for me

you cannot escape anymore than I can

You look at me

and see humanity’s frailty exemplified

You look at me

and think of all the ways you are stronger

You see weakness in me,

refuse to recognise the commonality

If you allowed yourself to look and see and recognise,

what would happen?

You might have to face the reality of humanity

have to feel the ache of pain

know the struggle of striving and sometimes failing

You would be steadier for it,

testing resilience against the heaviness of life

We are the same inside, I can see it

We are the same inside, you won’t see it

But it will still come for you,

catch you unaware

leave you cowering in its wake

It will come for me too

but I will meet it head on

tested strength holding steady

We are the same inside,

fragile with humanity

- but fragile does not mean without strength

your misconception drives your rejection

and that is where your

weakness

truly lies

So, for Day 3 and song 3: Just Like You-inspired poetry.

Thanks for the support, Louies! I am really enjoying all the content from the talented Louies inspired by and excited for the beginning of LTWT 👍😊 It honestly does feel like a community, people who want the best for Louis and who want him to do what he obviously loves, people who find inspiration in his music and artistry. Louis’ humanity has always touched and inspired me and that is part of what I connected to with Just Like You: the humanity of human experience and emotion. I have met people who find that same humanity a weakness to be eradicated but I just don’t believe that, and this also inspired the poem.

#louis tomlinson #tracksintheam #mindofwalls #w4ltwt2022 #solo artist louis tomlinson #ltwt 2022 #day 3

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concerthopperblog · 3 years ago

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Favorite Americana Albums of 2022

Every year, trying to nail down my favorite Americana albums of the year is a chore. This year I didn't get a chance to listen to as many albums as I usually do, hence a Nigel Tufnel approved 11 instead of my usual 20, but that didn't make it any less difficult. Weeding down to 11 left out some stellar albums like River Whyless' 'Monoflora', Marcus King's 'Young Blood' and Erin Rae's 'Lighten Up.' They're all worthy, but just got pushed out by albums that just clicked for me slightly more.

This year's list is notable for the number of smaller acts on it. A lot of America's heavy hitters (Isbell, Yola, Giddens, Jarosz) didn't release albums in 2022, which let some artists who might have gotten pushed down the list to shine.

Like always, this isn't a list of the “best” albums, but just my favorite. The ones that spent the most time in my shuffle. Where I reviewed the album I've included a link to the full review. Where not, I've included a Youtube link to a standout song from the album.

11. Jake Blount- The New Faith The genius of Jake Blount's 'The New Faith' is that it's a concept album made up in large part of songs written by other people across a wide range of times. To tell a tale of a people navigating a world devastated by climate change, Blount found the apocalyptic potential of songs like Rosetta Tharpe's “Didn't It Rain” and made the most of them with just his vocal inflection. Bonus points for being the latest to incorporate a rapper into Americana music, an increasing trend that I am totally behind.

10. Leyla McCalla- Breaking the Thermometer The last of Our Native Daughters to knock it out of the park with a solo album, Leyla McCalla also went semi-concept with her Breaking the Thermometer. The result of a commission by Duke University involving Radio Haiti, the pirate radio station broadcasting messages and traditional music to a nation beset by oppressive regimes, McCalla uses clips from the station to set the tone for an album that traces her own Haitian roots. As would be expected from McCalla, the instrumental aspect is near perfection.

9. Aoife O'Donovan- Age of Apathy Aoife O'Donovan is as consistent as any artist in Americana music. The gentle fingerpicked melodies and almost fragile sounding voice match perfectly with the themes of Age of Apathy, an exploration of the devices and means we have to become more connected than ever, and how they took away the quiet spaces where contemplation and peace happen. A guest sit in from Allison Russell certainly doesn't hurt.

8. Keb' Mo'- Good to Be Keb' Mo's blues has been pulling tinges of Americana and folk music in for over a decade now. The mix fits Keb's style, which has always been much more bright and positive than your typical bluesman. On Good to Be, Keb' Mo' bounced between his current home of Nashville and his childhood home in Compton (literally. He bought his childhood home and turned it into a studio). The result is an album that touches on old-school blues (“All Dressed Up”, “Good Strong Woman”), breezy California soul (“62 Chevy, “Sunny and Warm”), and the album's highlight, “Louder”, Keb's channeling of David Bowie's “Changes” in which he assures his fellow boomers that the young are ready to assert themselves. “It's about to get louder. It's about to get real,” he croons, sounding like a proud papa.

7. Secret Emchy Society- Gold Country/Country Gold California's Secret Emchy Society is a leader in the increasingly public Queer Country movement. But SES doesn't rep Queer Country with preachy message songs. Instead, they endeavor to out-sing, out-booze, out-fight, and out-party the best of the outlaws and dare you to tell them they don't belong at the table they just drank you under. Take “I Murdered Your Bourbon” with its “Well they say ole Jesus turned water to wine. If he'd tried a bit harder, could have turned it to rye.” It's not subtle. It's not a gentle exploration of the human condition. It isn't supposed to be. This is a jumping honky tonk in CD format.

6. Colin Hay- The Now and the Evermore Former Man at Work Colin Hay has always been known for his comedic timing, enough so that he once played the comedy tent at Bonnaroo. So when he says he's releasing an album dealing with themes of mortality, my immediate thought was “this is Colin's pandemic album. It's going to be dark. But it's still going to be fun.” I was right. There is a melancholy that persists on The Now and the Evermore that is mitigated by Hay's gentle croon and eternal optimism. Throughout he faces mortality, both of friends and his own, with a sly sense of humor that seems willing to invite Death in for tea before chatting up the mysteries of the ever after.

5. Molly Tuttle and Golden Highway- Crooked Tree I've seen some people say that Molly Tuttle's new bluegrass band project, Golden Highway, is her true form. I'm not ready to go that far because I still love Molly's more Americana output but there's no doubt that Tuttle's having fun with the project and she shines here. It's not something you can feel on studio albums often but Tuttle's joy is in every note and her status as a monster of acoustic guitar remains. I've give the hot take here and say Molly is a better guitarist than Billy Strings.

4. Miko Marks and the Resurrectors- Feel Like Going Home Miko Marks was my find of Americanafest 2022, her performance just before her new album Feel Like Going Home was released. Lucky me. Like her performance, the album is impressive. Marks is the best since Yola at mixing country, gospel, Memphis blues, and Muscle Shoals soul sounds into one cohesive vision. Throughout, Marks' voice soars above gospel choirs while her band, the aptly named Resurrectors, throw rock and roll licks that could raise the dead.

3. Regina Spektor- Home, Before and After Nobody does a balance between wistful and playful like Regina Spektor. Both are prevalent throughout Home, Before and After, whether on the schoolroom rhyming “Loveology” or the epic journey that is her almost 9 minute “Spacetime Fairytale.” Her exploration of the nuances of relationships leaves no stone unturned, delving into obsession, devastating loss, and even love of convenience (the last delivered with chuckle-inducing frankness on album standout “Sugarman”).

2. John Moreland- Birds in the Ceiling John Moreland has always been an artist who mastered the art of the understatement. You won't find strident calls to action or snarling protest songs on Birds in the Ceiling (somewhat ironic considering Moreland came to Americana from the punk scene). As is his wont, Moreland takes on a divided nation, the loss of friends to cultish political demagoguery, and late stage capitalism (on the album's best song, “Cheap Idols Dressed in Expensive Garbage”) with an even and rough hewn voice that makes lines like “I told you the truth and you told me it was treason” all the more impactful. This is easily John Moreland's most mature, most cohesive, and most well-produced album of his career.

1. Tami Neilson- Kingmaker Most years I have a pretty solid idea of what my favorite album is, but the gap between it and #2 is rarely so wide. 2022 was the year of Tami Neilson and it wasn't even close. The New Zealander by way of Canada had an entire pandemic to process the #metoo movement that immediately preceded it and answered with Kingmaker, an album full of feminist ferocity. The adage may go “behind every good man is a good woman” but Neilson makes it clear that the women who populate the songs on Kingmaker are not interested in being behind anyone. From “Mama's Talkin'” with its “he cries cancel culture anytime anyone calls him out” to album standout “Careless Woman” which finds Neilson looking at the kind of woman warned against in all those '50s educational films and admiring her, noting that “I wanna care less.” But it's not all rockabilly feminism as Neilson and Willie Nelson duet on a touching tribute to family lost on “Beyond the Stars.” It's a particularly topical song in a time when tens of thousands lost loved ones to a pandemic. Taken as a whole, it's an album that would be a career album for most artists. Neilson shows no intention of slowing down, though, so who knows what's to come?

#2022 #best of 2022 #americana music #americana #album review #review #concerthopper #new music #music #classic country #bluegrass

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mostlycompetentwriter · 5 years ago

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Any

F/M pairing: Fem!Reader x Felix (SKZ)

Genre: Sugar Daddy AU! Established Relationship

Word Count: 5K

Warnings: mature content, aged-up characters, and alcohol use

Summary: Despite your feelings, you couldn’t help but think that Felix viewed your relationship as nothing but superficial - he wanted a travel companion, and you needed money for your college tuition. But maybe you want more than that, and convincing Felix proves to be harder than you thought...

You were exhausted - an unfortunate result of all those college courses catching up to you at once.

It was difficult for you to open your eyes, groaning because you didn’t feel like dealing with real life. And while you stretched out your limbs across the bed, you wrinkled your nose at the thought of leaving the warm sheets. But a gentle chuckle broke through your reverie, and you followed the sweet sound to an angelic face shadowed by the corner.

“Felix?” you whispered, glancing to the side where the older man was watching you from a comfortable futon. He held a cup of coffee in one hand while his other was preoccupied with a string attached to his pants.

“I didn’t want to wake you,” Felix said with a deep morning voice that you could never resist.

“What time is it?” you asked, squinting at the alarm clock on the nightstand.

“8:00 AM,” Felix replied. “Your body isn’t used to this time zone.”

“I guess not,” you said, but it was never easy flying around the world with Felix. There was always the risk of jet-lag, long lay-overs, and the difficult adjustment of jumping between morning and night as you traversed the continents.

“Are you comfortable?” Felix asked. “I can send for whatever you like.”

“I’m okay,” you assured him, and then you eyed the inviting expanse of his lap. “Can I sit with you?” you asked with a smile.

Felix tilted his head to the side as he considered your request. “Of course.”

His easy compliance energized you more than any amount of sleep ever could, and you walked over to where he was waiting. It was the perfect start to your day, and you sat on his lap with a smile, wrapping your arms around his neck as you connected your lips for a passionate kiss tinged with the faint taste of the coffee lingering on his tongue.

It had taken a long time for you to convince Felix that it was okay for him to kiss you. During the first few months of your arrangement, you were lucky enough to even hold his hand, but he gradually warmed up the idea. Even if your very first kiss with Felix was nothing but a chaste peck that ended with you chasing after his lips while he resisted.

But it was more comfortable in the present. He even seemed to enjoy kissing you, and that was enough for your fragile heart which beat exclusively for him. Yet, Felix was still an enigma - a Matryoshka doll with layer upon layer of interesting details. And you were determined to understand him while doing your best to convince Felix that you considered your relationship to be much more than its premise. Back when he found your profile on an online Sugar Daddy website (which was totally your friend’s idea), and he sent you a rather complex email listing out everything that he wanted in a potential arrangement:

- Travel companion

- Confidant

- Event partner

You were shocked that he hadn’t included anything about intimacy because every other person on the site had specifically propositioned you with very explicit things. But sure enough, Felix met you the very next day and reiterated his conditions, and you discovered for yourself that he respected the boundaries he had established - barely even touching you unless it was at a dinner party and he politely kept you away from his much less civil co-workers.

But over time, the arrangement had evolved for you into something meaningful, and you found yourself wanting more as you grew increasingly attracted to him. Unfortunately, everything was playing out at a rather slow pace, and it was always you who encouraged Felix along, but maybe you also weren’t the best choice because you certainly lacked patience. But it was hard to hold yourself together around him, especially when he took the initiative to plunge his tongue between your teeth.

In a rush of arousal, you reached down for the noticeable bugle in his suit-pants, pressing down using the heel of your hand - rubbing generous circles against his erection. Felix moaned at the friction, but a warning alarm at the back of your mind told you that you were moving way too fast considering that Felix still blushed whenever you let him touch your breasts.

And it wasn’t entirely surprising when he grabbed your wrist, breaking the kiss with a wet smack while his eyes stared into yours. “Uhhh...”

“Let’s go downstairs for breakfast,” Felix said, shifting you off his lap and ignoring your pout.

You watched Felix leave the room with a sigh. Because despite all this time that you’ve spent together, Felix still refused to sleep with you, and you can’t figure out why he keeps turning down your blatant offers. He was paying you after all, and he was paying you a lot, so why didn’t he ever want anything more than a comfortable conversation or a gentle kiss?

It seemed that your progress with him was at a standstill because anything past kissing or touching above the waist always ruined the mood. And at one point, you tried to encourage him to tell you about his interests and what he liked, but Felix never talked about himself. For example, whenever you asked him a question about his work or interests, he always offered you a vague answer before redirecting the questions back to you again.

But maybe there something wrong with you? Did he not find you attractive?

“Y/N,” Felix said to break your self-loathing thoughts. “Are you ready?”

“Give me a few minutes,” you said, and Felix nodded with a smile before closing the door and leaving you alone to consider what had just happened.

In between your travels with Felix, you tried to balance an active social life with a productive college course-load. It was really hard sometimes, especially when your instincts always led you to appease Felix above everything else. You had already lost count of the number of weekend parties and friendly get-togethers that you had missed to join him at the office or cancel plans when he mentioned another overseas business conference.

It was a little desperate on your part, but whenever Felix sent you a text message or called you on the phone, you always answered with a chipper smile and warm tone. You could be having the worst day of your life, but you would never let him know that.

“Can you meet me at the office?” Felix had asked you earlier, and you agreed quietly before dismissing yourself from a lunch date that you were having with some friends who all whined about you leaving them.

But Felix was your priority, and you were genuinely excited when he pulled you into a hug before escorting you inside his office. “There’s some things to discuss,” Felix said, and you groaned because that usually meant sitting in front of his desk while he insisted on a serious demeanor. “Your classes,” Felix said once he sat down, holding out a hand expectantly which meant you were forced to pull up the grade-book for your courses online.

Felix was incredibly adamant about your grades, and he always insisted on checking-in to ensure that you were performing well. “It’s not completely updated,” you said once he took your phone and examined the screen.

“What happened in your math class?” Felix asked with narrowed eyes. “You told me about this one when we traveled to Europe.”

“Right,” you said with an anxious clearing of your throat. Because on that trip, Felix had insisted that you stay in the hotel room to study while he went downstairs to entertain some business partners. But you only got through the second chapter of your notes before throwing on your swimsuit and sneaking out to enjoy the poolside amenities. “My overall grade is still a B,” you said. “And the professor agreed to give me an extra credit assignment.”

Felix grunted at your words before sliding the phone screen back across to you. “When is next month’s tuition due?”

“At the end of November,” you said quietly, watching as Felix opened his laptop to peruse the bright screen.

“Send me the bill,” he said. “I’ll have the money transferred.”

“Okay,” you said, wincing when he started frowning at something.

“Your checking account is low,” he remarked, and his fingers moved rapidly over the keys. “You’re supposed to tell me when its below $1,000.”

“Oh,” you mumbled. “I guess I forgot.”

“I’ll fix it,” Felix said, and it always amazed you that he could be so nonchalant with giving you his money. “I see that your rent was payed last week.”

“Everything’s fine,” you said, hoping to cut this part of your conversation short because there was a part of you (growing bigger each day) that regretted the fact that Felix didn’t know your true feelings for him.

He meant a lot more to you than someone who gave you money like it was candy.

“Your meal plan carries over?” Felix asked. “Do you need me to upgrade it? Are you getting enough to eat? Because they have this unlimited plan...”

“Felix,” you interrupted. “It’s just right for me.”

“Well,” Felix said, sitting back further in his chair. “I do have something else to ask you.”

“About?”

“Your birthday,” Felix chuckled, and you were surprised that he remembered. “It’s next week, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” you said because you weren’t quite sure what to make of Felix’s impressive attention to detail.

“You’ll be turning 21,” Felix said. “I want to make it special for you.”

“We could just chill at my apartment,” you said, and Felix smiled at such a menial suggestion.

“Of course we’ll do that, but I’m sure there’s something else you want?” Felix asked, silencing an incoming call on his cellphone. “I’ll buy you anything.”

“I don’t know,” you trailed off sheepishly before fixing him with a warm smile. “I wouldn’t mind just spending time with you.”

“You don’t have to flatter me, Y/N,” Felix said. “Please let me buy you something.”

“Oh,” you said, caught off-guard by his insistence. “Maybe something that I need for school?”

“Y/N, that’s no good for a present,” Felix said. “Be honest with me. Do you need another computer? Is your apartment comfortable? What about your car, is it still in good shape?”

You hesitated at each of the ostentatious suggestions. “Uh, my phone is fi-”

“Done!” Felix said, and he immediately returned to his laptop screen. “The newest model has amazing storage space.”

“Does it?” you asked, but it was more rhetorical than anything. Because something was bothering you about the idea of Felix buying you such superficial things.

But it didn’t used to? What had changed?

“I know you have another class in an hour,” Felix said, and he stood from his desk with a smile. “My assistant can give you a ride back to your school.”

His hand was warm against you lower back as he led you closer to the door. “I’ll see you later,” Felix said, and he brushed his lips against yours before the office door was closing between you and the frustrating man who was completely oblivious.

For the most part, whenever Felix asked you to come over to his apartment, you often found yourself sitting on the edge of the counter while you watched him cook for you - a delightful combination of pasta dinners, brownies and cookies, and everything in between.

And even though you hadn’t quite turned 21, Felix never minded giving you some of his impressive collection of wine. He even insisted because certain wines complemented his dishes. “Try this with the chardonnay,” he said while pushing the glass closer to your pasta.

You nodded and brought the glass to your lips, watching as he returned to the oven to check on the brownies that he made for dessert. “Tell me about your music, Y/N,” Felix said while jabbing a toothpick into the gooey cake mixture.

“I have another composition in the works,” you said, and it was always really easy to talk about music with Felix. Because he was one of the only people you’d ever met who was so genuinely interested in hearing you talk about music - it’s what you talked about the most, especially in bed together.

Apparently, Felix had once wanted to study music when he was younger, but his father pressured him into studying business so that he could takeover their accounting firm in the future. It was one of the very few things you knew about Felix, other than his insane cooking talents and sweet personality.

But Felix loved to hear you discuss your music, and he adored your compositions when you played them for him over the impressive sound system in the living room. Oftentimes, Felix would make copies of your compositions for himself, despite your insistence that they weren’t very professional. He even had entire recordings on his computer that he listened to while he was working.

“It would sound better if I had a good microphone,” you said with a sigh, not really understanding the implications of your words until Felix spoke up again.

“Send me a description of what you need,” Felix said. “I’ll buy it for you.”

“Oh, Felix, it’s really not a big deal...”

“I insist,” Felix said while finishing off his wine. “I’ll have my assistant go out tomorrow and get it for you.”

You knew that it would be impossible to convince Felix otherwise, and there were more pressing things to worry about. Like when you noticed that he had only taken a few bites of his food before leaning in closer to you - chin propped against his hand as he listened to you speak. “Aren’t you hungry?” you asked, pointing to his discarded plate.

“Why? Would you like some more?” Felix asked, and you didn’t even get a chance to answer before he was pushing his plate in your direction. “Take as much as you want.”

“But it’s yours,” you said, even while Felix was already standing up from his chair to retrieve the brownies from the kitchen counter.

“I made these for you,” Felix said. “I noticed how much you liked them last time.”

“They’re amazing,” you said, and you were pleased when he lowered his head to connect your lips together.

“I also bought you something,” Felix said while pulling away from your kiss. “Check the bed.”

“What?” you laughed, and you accepted Felix’s outstretched hand as he led the two of you into his enormous bedroom. And sure enough there was a delicate package waiting on the center of the bed, wrapped neatly in purple wrapping paper with a cute bow on top. “You didn’t need to do this,” you said while reaching down for the gift.

“I thought of you when I saw it,” Felix said, and he lingered close to your side while you carefully discarded the paper and retrieved whatever was inside the velvety black box.

Unsurprisingly, the gift inside was gorgeous - a tiny set of earrings with a diamond center that probably cost him an atrocious amount of money. “They’re beautiful,” you told him, and you smiled when Felix insisted on putting them in himself.

“They complement your eyes,” he said once the earrings were in place.

“Thank you,” you said while holding back the overwhelming urge to kiss him again.

“I should also mention that I have a conference in Seattle this weekend,” Felix said, and he turned you from side to side with a pleased smile. “Are you available to come with me?”

“Of course,” you said, and you gave no thought to any prior engagements, holding out your hand when Felix dropped a ticket into your open palms.

“Let’s lie down for a little while,” Felix suggested, and you nodded your agreement while watching him drop down onto the edge of the bed to remove his watch.

It was a familiar scene, and you carefully folded your ticket inside your jacket, removing it from your shoulders before crawling onto the bed next to him. “What should we talk about?” you asked around a yawn, snuggling closer to Felix’s side as he wrapped an arm around your waist.

“Tell me about the internship you’re applying for,” Felix said. “I’m very proud of your ambitions.”

You heart gave a happy flutter at the idea of Felix being proud of you for anything, and there was a deep-rooted desire to move even closer to him despite the fact that it wasn’t possible considering your current position. But you talked about the internship with unrivaled enthusiasm - a spot for a local radio station - and Felix listened as usual while his fingers curled through your own.

It was incredibly warm and comfortable, and you loved being close enough to him to smell his cologne and connect the freckles beneath his eyes into fascinating constellations. There was nothing but affection in your heart, and maybe your feelings were even deeper than you anticipated, and you longed to go even further - to form a physical connection with him that was just as satisfying as the emotional one that often kept you up at night with dreams of the future.

“Felix,” you whispered, and he hummed in acknowledgement. “Can I kiss you?”

He shifted at your side, finding your gaze with a kind smile. “Of course you can.”

It was the only affirmation that you required to dig your fingers into the well-pressed collar of his shirt, keeping him close as you explored his lips with your tongue, tracing over the seam of his mouth as he opened up for you. And Felix moaned when your tongues met somewhere in the middle, forcing you to wonder if he tasted the chocolate from dinner with his penetrative exploration of your mouth.

But you were feeling so aroused by his deep moans, and you threw one leg over his hip before grabbing his hand and leading it beneath your skirt. Felix gasped into your kiss when he realized that you weren’t wearing anything underneath, and he quickly snatched his hand away so fast that you almost got whiplash from the jarring movement.

“Don’t do that,” Felix said, and he intertwined your fingers together before resuming your kiss like there was nothing wrong.

But you didn’t feel the same way, and you broke the kiss because you were suddenly feeling light-headed. Was there something wrong with you? Because his behavior had no other explanation, even as Felix simply continued to leave sweet kisses along your neck - gentle pecks that served more as a reminder of his presence rather than anything sensual.

You could feel your heart twisting inside your chest - a distant feeling of the earlier elation that had sent it palpating against your breastbone. There were also tears in your eyes when your mind instantly thought of a thousand different scenarios that all attempted to explain what had happened. Should you just keeping waiting? Maybe you needed to be more patient?

But you were done with having patience with a man who was almost ten years older than you! He should know how you feel, and he should’ve already recognized the signs you were giving off whenever you lingered in the same room. Instead, it almost felt like he was ignoring you, or choosing to remain in this strange limbo that was starting to become too much for your confused emotions.

“Y/N,” Felix whispered when he realized that you weren’t returning his affection. “Are you okay?”

“No,” you said in return, and it seemed to startle Felix who fumbled upwards into a sitting position.

“Did I hurt you?” Felix asked, and you could tell that he was worried when he examined you closely.

“I don’t think you’ve realized...” you tried, but the words slipped away because you no longer felt confident enough to say them. “Do you not want me?” you asked him instead, looking at Felix with tears clumping the massacre on your eyelashes.

“Y/N-”

“No!” You insisted firmly, surprising both Felix and yourself. “I’ve had enough, Felix. I’m going home.”

“Y/N!” Felix said, and his tone was much firmer as he grabbed your wrist and halted your attempts to leave the bed. “This is not how I’ll handle things with you. Tell me what I’ve done to upset you.”

You shook your head, seeing nothing but a hazy image of Felix from behind your tears. “You should already know,” you said while pulling your wrist away from him. “I thought I made my feelings clear, but you keep rejecting me!”

Felix’s eyes widened with the realization of what you meant. “Y/N, that was never apart of our arrangement.”

“Yeah.” You laughed, but it was mirthless. “Our arrangement.”

It was all the confirmation that you needed to understand that Felix would never see your relationship as anything but a man and a woman who met online and decided to try something that was never meant to last.

You had been hurt by men before, but you had also never cared as much about your past boyfriends as you did with Felix.

He had become everything to you, but the realization that your feelings weren’t mutual hurt your heart and spirit more than being left alone by a one-night stand or catching someone cheating on you. “It’s my fault, Y/N,” you friend said from your couch because you had called her on the way over to your apartment in tears. “I should’ve never encouraged you to sign up for that website.”

“Don’t blame yourself,” you said. “I should’ve never involved my feelings.”

“Well,” your friend said. “He’s still an ignorant asshole.”

You smiled at your friend’s defense of you, even if you didn’t agree. Despite everything that had happened that night with Felix, you couldn’t find it in yourself to hate him. And maybe that’s because the genuine feelings you had for him simply wouldn’t go away instantly.

It would take time to heal.

Closure.

Which is what you thought you were getting when you received a message from Felix later on:

FROM FELIX:

Y/N, I can’t express my thoughts in one or two sentences. Please pick-up when I call you. I feel it’s necessary to address these slights you’ve experienced, and you don’t even have to say a word to me.

You shivered at his request, clutching your phone tightly between your hands before it started ringing to penetrate the silence of your bedroom. “Hello?” you whispered into the other end, and there was a moment of quiet before Felix began to speak.

“This is not how I expected our night to end,” he said. “I’m deeply sorry for the pain that I caused you. I could see it in your eyes, and it hurt me more than you seem to think.”

You swallowed hard when he took a deep breath. “When I first found your profile, I hesitated to contact someone who, in my eyes, seemed like an untouchable slice of perfection. You loved music and dancing, and you had big dreams that you described with such elegant words. Although I was looking for a companion for my travels, I knew you would be so much more than my expectation, but it was hard to ignore how much I wanted to meet you.”

“I thought it would be best to establish boundaries because I initially imagined our relationship as nothing more than me helping out someone who needed the assistance that I could give. I couldn’t imagine you losing the chance to succeed because you weren’t able to afford tuition. When I was a student, I had the help of my father’s wealth, but he forced me to change my dreams because he wanted to mold me into an image of himself. And he was very successful because I used to be more carefree before I was told that I had to takeover our company. But I promised myself that I would help you because I wanted to be everything for you that my father was not.”

There was a shaky exhale, and you could hear the raw emotion in Felix’s tone. “You deserve better than me,” Felix whispered, and you could barely hold the phone as you felt the first tear fall. “I’m almost thirty-years-old, and I’m paying a student to spend time with me because I’m so bad at meeting people. I organized this whole thing to satisfy my own selfish desires to live vicariously through someone else and experience what my father never allowed me to have.”

You opened your mouth to speak, to reassure him that you had never felt like he was taking advantage of you, but the words were caught between your brain and tongue.

“As for your insinuation that I couldn’t possibly want you...” Felix paused, and you could easily imagine that the conversation had ended abruptly. “I chose not to have a physical relationship with you because I could never imagine in my wildest dreams that someone as young and beautiful as yourself could truly want a sexual relationship with an older man who spends most of his time balancing numbers. If we’re talking our truest desires, then there’s nothing more that I want in this world than your sweet touch, but I won’t allow myself to ruin someone as pure and good as you.”

He cleared his throat at that statement, and you wondered what your relationship might’ve looked like if you had been more honest with him from the beginning. “Perhaps I also grew too complacent with what we had because it was more than any scenario I could’ve came up with inside my head. I love our talks together, Y/N, and you can’t imagine how wonderful it is to travel the world with you - to sleep next to you at night and kiss you because I cherish every moment of your time with me.”

“So please don’t feel hurt by someone like me. Because you’re worth more than all the money I have, and you deserve a wonderful life where you become someone who recognizes the greatness that I see in her. But if this is meant to be goodbye, then know that I love you so much, and I will never forget the artist who changed my world.”

There was a click following his passionate declaration, and then you were greeted by the dial tone.

You thought about Felix for the entire week following his unexpected phone call. His words haunted you during your classes, and you could barely focus when you were working on your schoolwork or hanging out with friends. The confession of his love weighed heavily on your conscious, and you knew that you needed to see him again

It was incredibly risky, but there was an even bigger part of yourself that didn’t care about the consequences. And you found yourself taking a taxi to the airport where Felix was set to depart for Seattle, ticket tucked into the back of your jeans pocket while your suitcase rolled along next to you. Of course, there was a small part of you that worried you might not be able to find Felix, or maybe he wouldn’t want to see you.

But you were tired of being cautious, and Felix was worth the extra effort to hand over your ticket to the flight attendant who encouraged you to wait in the first-class lobby. You thanked her quietly, and your hand was shaking when you reached out for the door handle, pushing it open before scanning your eyes across the customers waiting inside.

It was mostly people in expensive suits, looking through their cellphone or reading the newspaper. But it was impossible to miss a familiar mop of blonde-hair, and your eyes met Felix’s from across the room - a moment in time when it felt like you were the only two people left in the room.

And you could tell that Felix was surprised, but he didn’t protest when you sat next to him. “Hi,” you said in a shy voice, fixing your suitcase against the wall while your hands curled together in your lap.

“Y/N,” Felix said with a gentle tone. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

“I thought you wanted me to come,” you reminded him, and you held up your ticket with a smile.

Felix visibly swallowed as he stared at you. “I figured you wouldn’t want to see me anymore.”

“Why?” you asked him. “After those things you said to me...Felix, I only want to see you more.”

He was silent then, contemplative as he took a deep breath. “I hurt you, Y/N. I don’t deserve to be with you.”

“That’s not true,” you said. “Well, maybe I felt hurt, but I think we’re both to blame.”

“You should know that I’ll continue to help you with your schooling,” Felix said. “But the other part of the arrangement...”

“Felix, I insist,” you said while grabbing his hand. “I like spending time with you, Felix,” you said. “You’re a literal angel.”

“I don’t know about that,” Felix said. “There’s a lot about me that you still don’t know.”

“And that’s okay,” you reassured him. “Because I’d really like to find out more about you and everything that you enjoy.”

“I’m still sorry,” Felix insisted. “I’m sorry that I let you get so involved while pushing you away at the same time.”

“I’ll just have to show you that I care more than you think,” you said. “Let me start helping you as well.”

“But you’ve already helped me,” Felix said. “You’ve done so much for me, and you can’t even imagine how grateful I am.”

“Well, I might since the feeling is mutual,” you said. “I don’t want you to question whether or not you deserve me because I love being with you, and this stopped being just a sporadic arrangement for me a long time ago.”

Felix nodded, even if there was still a touch of hesitation. “And how do you feel about...intimacy? I know that’s something you want.”

“I only want it if you’re interested,” I said.

“What if I wasn’t?”

“Then I would respect that,” you said. “It still wouldn’t send me away.”

“That means a lot to me,” Felix said. “I would be interested as long as you’re okay with me touching you,” Felix said, and he was clearly blushing at the idea.

But you found it to be endearing, prodding at the reddening skin of his face with your finger. “Let’s try a normal relationship,” you said. “Like a couple.”

Felix smiled, and he was much more suited for brightness as opposed to the despondency that you discovered when you first arrived. “I like that idea.”

“It seems better for us,” you said before expectantly turning your head in his direction. “Does that mean I can have a kiss?”

Felix laughed at your brazenness, and you were still smiling even while your lips smoothed across his in a passionate display of the secret feelings and affections that had finally been exposed for him to return with equal amounts of love and adoration.

#stayverse #skzwriternnet #stray kids fanfic #skz fanfic #skz imagines #skz scenarios #skz oneshots #stray kids oneshot #stray kids fluff #skz angst #skz felix #stray kids felix fanfic #lee felix fanfic #felix fanfic #skz felix fanfic #felix fluff #mostlycompetent #requested

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evakuality · 4 years ago

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Mia, episode seven

Sorry, don’t read this if you like Mia. I am not a fan of hers in this episode.

1. Ugh. I do not like that there is no recognition here of the conversation with Kiki. I don’t get it - if you’re going to have that conversation and make it feel like a wrench for Mia to ‘give up’ Alex, why not address it properly? Even if this comes up again later, I dislike that when she arrived there was no discussion about the Kiki thing, and now it’s all about sex with no recognition that she is now literally lying and going behind Kiki’s back. Worse, it was Mia who told Kiki she would do whatever it took to keep her friendship, so she lied about that too. I’m really disappointed in where this went. She didn’t have to tell Kiki she would give Alex up - they were having a really honest conversation and she could just have said ‘I fell for him even though I know I shouldn’t’ and I don’t understand why they made that choice. I don’t remember the og on this at all so I don’t know if they got it from there, but even if it is in there, they could have chosen to not have Mia deliberately and specifically lie to Kiki’s face and then act like she has no compunction about it at all.

2. Okay so they’re finally talking about Kiki, but Mia dismisses that with ‘it’s not about Kiki’ and ‘I already talked to her’? When that conversation literally ended differently, and now she’s lying to both Alex and Kiki? Yeah, this isn’t doing it for me at all. And to think, I actually did like Mia before this. But the end of the last episode and the start of this one has really revised my feelings on her. It’s not just Alex who’s being a dick in this situation. I also don’t like that we’re supposed to be feeling sorry for Alex here because he has ‘problems with his parents’. I know, assuming this is like the og, that there is a deeper thing here with the sister, but even so. How on earth can they have a relationship when it’s based on lies and hating each other’s family circumstances? I still don’t understand what they see in each other. If it’s only sex, then there are SO many more people out there and nothing so far has sold me that either of them genuinely likes the other as a person.

3. And yet another clip with Mia knowing she’s being an asshole and choosing not to address it. I know she has this need to be in control and I know she’s doing something that’s for her for once and that’s probably both exhilarating and scary, but ugh. The amount of lies is really building up. Most of the other couples in our little world have communication issues etc, and many are hiding things, but actually lying on purpose like this isn’t as common and Mia is just casually throwing them out there like it’s easy. Also ‘why me?’ ‘because you know who I am’ - ummmm, no she doesn’t Alex. You’re literally hiding stuff from her as well!! Unless you mean, she knows you’re an asshole and gives you the time of day anyway? Plus, it’s not believable - Alex clearly started stalking/pursuing/gaslighting her well before she showed that she ‘knew’ him. Like it’s nice that they’re trying to ‘communicate’ here, but if they’re just going to keep lying it’s not actually going to help.

4. I get what they’re going for with this little bubble the two of them are in. But Mia literally is avoiding her life and the more time she spends not connecting with her friends, the more likely they are to be concerned. This bubble can’t last and I dislike that this whole thing is built on such a fragile and unbelievable base for them as they pretend the rest of the world doesn’t exist. It’s strange that I’m okay with it with Matteo and David and their fake vs real thing, but I think it’s because the issues are different and there were no specific promises to other people not to connect. Keeping things private is different from lying outright. Plus, neither Matteo nor David was an actual asshole and I still don’t believe that Alex isn’t the guy he showed through 1.5 seasons, and the one who was so awful to Kiki.

5. And of course, as expected, Kiki finds out when she’s trying to do something nice for Mia. And of course she’s now more hurt than she was before. So, now Mia thinks ‘I can’t do this to Kiki’? Not a few days ago when Kiki was vulnerable and open with her? No, it has to be now after she made things 500% worse. It’s funny - I don’t usually find myself in a situation where I dislike the PoV character in these shows. But here I am. I actually dislike Mia in this episode. I can usually get where a character is coming from even when I can see them totally stuffing up, but here she’s made conscious and deliberate choices and I don’t have any sympathy that they’ve come back to bite her. I usually have some sympathy for the struggles, but not today.

6. I know, from things that I’ve seen around, what this bunch of all-caps texts from Alex are about. But again, Mia has no reason to know and respond the way she does. It might have helped if we knew ahead of time what is going on with him, even if it was mentioned casually before maybe. But instead, we have her jumping to her feet and rushing off to him for no real reason. This is, again, the big problem Druck always has - pacing and making the story beats believable as an entirety rather than as discrete clips. Even looking at the time for this episode - we had the entire build up and destruction of their relationship within the space of half an episode and now less than a minute later it’s all back on because of this panic attack. It’s too fast, no time to breathe. Skam and its offshoots always work best when things are allowed to develop organically and at a pace that isn’t this rushed. The clip format is half to blame for this, but even with that it should be possible to develop this whole thing at an easier pace that builds tension and makes sense.

7. Pacing, pacing, pacing. Ugh. Just this episode Mia explained why she’s not ready for sex, and now when Alex is or has been in a vulnerable state, she’s all ‘hey you know what would be a great idea? Sex’ Why does all this stuff all have to be in one episode? Why did we need so much of Alex being an asshole at the start of the season only to cram so much of the important relationship development stuff into one short episode? I know they had to cut it down from the og (thank goodness, that one was far too long), but there are ways they could have done it while letting all these plotpoints breathe a bit. It’s too crammed into one episode when it didn’t have to be.

8. Yes Hanna, express this stuff for me: ‘all this happened in the last 3 days?’ Exactly. Also this scene proves once again why Mia and Hanna should be a thing. They have real, genuine conversations in which no-one ends up feeling belittled. And they have great chemistry. Seriously, Mia should have looked in this direction. But honestly, in terms of pacing, Kiki finding out at the end of this episode and then this whole part being the focus of the next one would work better. This whole business with Carlos is cute and all, and his advice is actually pretty decent, but again it’s all so rushed. Again, I know this was released clip by clip and so the format is a bit different, but it should probably also work in an episodic format. I feel like I’ve lived 3 episodes all in one go and now we have the other girls showing up and being disapproving as well; it’s too much.

9. I don’t like that two episodes in a row (and after such a LOT in this one) we have a ‘Mia trying to be open with Kiki’ scene. This excuse ‘I wanted to protect you’ is unkind and we already saw on more than one occasion how Mia protecting Kiki was a bad thing for Mia. Also ‘I didn’t understand that it’s something serious between Alex and me’ is such a huge problem for me. She literally lied to Kiki’s face and then went to Alex immediately afterwards. So either she did know how serious it was or she didn’t really care that much and didn’t need to go back to him at all. This is so frustrating because we’re supposed to accept all of this at face value when actually on any sort of consideration it doesn’t hold up. So even though Kiki’s little speech is really good and does highlight all the issues I have with Mia, unfortunately a) I already disliked her because of it and b) because it’s all so rushed, I don’t care about any of it. Except Kiki. Which, considering how awful and racist etc she has been is a huge feat. And effectively, Kiki has moved herself aside and allowed Mia to have Alex if she wants. All of this in one episode!

Basically I did not enjoy this episode, there was too much crammed into it (I have this same issue with some of Nora’s in s5, and it is one of the biggest issues I often have with Druck compared to the og) and so while Kiki’s speech should have been a turning point allowing us to see a way into Mia’s future, I am actually left disliking our main character and not all that inclined to watch the rest of the season.

#mia- episode 7 #update on feelings about Alex - still not a fan #but surprising rn I like him more than I do Mia #so there's a warning - don't read if you like her #I don't have much nice to say about her

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anatrik · 5 years ago

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folklore and evermore sister songs list

1. the 1- champagne problems.

Common themes:

Failed relationship with unresolved feelings on both sides.

No satisfactory closure.

Recurring devices:

Champagne ( Rosè, Dom Perignon)

Toasts with friends (rosè flowing with your chosen family// no crowd of friends applauded)

Overall reminiscent tone

2. cardigan- willow.

Common themes:

A strong undercurrent of Possessiveness that seems to imply that no one could ever know or love him like she does. (I knew you dancing in your Levis, drunk under the street light, heart beat on the highline...// That's my man)

A certain sense of inevitability born of the long shared history of the two protagonists.

All is fair in this love. (I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired...I knew you'd come back to me// there's one prize I'd cheat to win)

Recurring devices:

Infidelity and forgiveness (I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired...I knew you'd come back to me// wherever you stray I'll follow)

Scars (you drew stars around my scars// show me the places where the others gave you scars)

Trains (heartbeat on the highline, stepping off the last train//you know that my train could take you home)

Linked music videos

Similar instrumentals

3. exile- coney island.

Common theme:

Contemplating the death of a relationship and the role each side played in hastening it

Recurring devices:

Male- Female duet,

Call and response ( you never gave a warning sign, I gave so many signs// did I leave you hanging every single day? did I paint your bluest skies the darkest grey?)

References to fragility ( did I close my fist around something delicate// balancing on breaking branches, we always walked a very thin line)

4. my tears ricochet- closure.

Common theme:

Scathing indictment of a much loathed ex

Recurring devices:

The ex who wants to be the good guy/hero and everything to be neatly tied up with no loose ends ( don't treat me like some situation that needs to be handled//you're the hero flying around saving face)

Reaching out after its too late ( if I'm dead to you why are you at the wake cursing my name//reaching out across the sea that you put between you and me)

5. mirrorball- tolerate it.

Common themes:

Power imbalance

Going above and beyond for someone who doesn't appreciate it (or atleast doesn't let the singer know that they do)

Recurring devices:

Constantly giving one's best (still on that tightrope still trying everything//use my best colors for your portrait)

Insecurity and a pathological need to be palatable ( I can change everything about me to fit in, shining just for you// I take your indiscretions all in good fun, I sit and listen)

Self deprecating self awareness in the outro (I want you to know I'm a mirrorball// I sit and watch you)

6. seven- dorothea.

Common themes:

Friendship

Innocence

Blurring the line between a best friend and a first love

Strong Homoerotic undertones

Recurring devices:

Quintessential American Towns™ (Reading, Pennsylvania// Tupelo, Mississippi)

The trustworthy friend™ (cross my heart won't tell no other// if you're ever tired for being known for you know, you know you'll always know me, I still got love for you// and I've got nothing but well wishes for ya)

Shared Memories (sweet tea in the summer, your braids like a pattern// skipping the prom, the soul I met under the bleachers)

7. august- gold rush.

Common themes:

Summer romance

Forbidden fruit

Other woman perspective

Recurring devices:

The beach (salt air, your back beneath the sun// costal town we wandered around, ships on water)

Sex (twisted in bedsheets// my eagles tshirt hanging from your door)

Yearning and jealousy (your back beneath the sun, wishing I could write my name on it// I don't like that anyone would die to feel your touch everybody wants you)

Knowing he belongs to another (you weren't mine to lose// I cant dare to dream about you)

8. illicit affairs- tis the damn season.

Common theme:

"Driving a new Maserati down a dead end street"

Longing for things to be different

Recurring devices:

Time limit ( a drug that only works the first few hundred times//you could call me babe for the weekend)

Roads (take the road less travelled by// road not taken looks real good now)

Perfume (leave the perfume on the shelf...don't even exist//the holidays linger like a bad perfume)

Sneaking around (clandestine meetings//I parked between the Methodist and the school that used to be ours)

A once in a lifetime connection (you showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else// the only soul who knows which smiles I'm faking)

9. invisible string- ivy.

Common theme:

The unbreakable bond between soul mates

Recurring devices:

Color (green grass// ivy, single thread of gold //tarnished glow, teal shirt//opal eyes)

Physical allegory of their connection (invisible string tying you to me// your ivy grows and now I'm covered)

10. mad woman- no body no crime.

Common theme:

Murderous Female Rage™

Recurring devices:

Boats (my canons all firing at your yatch// good thing my daddy made me get a boating licence),

Infidelity (the master of spin has a couple side flings// her husband's acting different and it smells like infidelity)

Mad women.

11. epiphany- marjorie.

Common theme:

Taylor's grandparents

Death

Recurring devices:

The number 13

Dreams (dream of some epiphany// your closets of backlogged dreams)

12. peace- happiness.

Common theme:

Title subversion (would it be enough if I could never give you peace// therell be happiness after you)

13. hoax- evermore.

Common theme:

Extremely sad songs with ultimately hopeful messages

Recurring devices:

Melancholia (stood on a cliffside screaming give me a reason// I was catching my breath barefoot in the wildest winter catching my death)

Distrust (your faithless love// I couldn't be sure I had a feeling so peculiar that this pain would be for evermore)

Self loathing (barren land, I am ash from your fire// motion capture put me in a bad light)

Turmoil (sleepless nights, winless fight// I've been feeling unmoored I'm on waves out being tossed)

Hope (your faithless love's the only hoax// this pain wouldn't be for evermore)

- Anatrik ©

FINALLLY did it

Best 5 hrs of my life that I've "wasted"

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pinkhairedlily · 4 years ago

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Breathing is a foreign task

Chapter 8 of The Spring He Came Back | 8 of 12

“Shirou!” Her voice was drowned out by the squeal of racing wheels against the rail and the loud whistle of its departure. Catching her breath, she hesitated for a few seconds but regained her composure and sprinted to the end of the platform, her bun coming undone with the icy wind. He was just standing at the door. He could still see her. “Shirou!”

He looked up at that moment, his eyes immediately locking with hers, and both mirrored confusing expressions of guilt, desperation, and relief. What a million words longing to be said. What a million thoughts needed to be shared. What a million things. She finally reached the end of the station where she could no longer run after him. She stared at the receding figure of the dreams that would take him away again.

Hinamori was grief-stricken. Apart from being kicked out of the academy, her grandmother suffered an infection which she thought Baba would never recover from. But she gained consciousness and her immune system ramped up – a miracle of miracles. For days, she never left Baba’s side, and for days, she didn’t think of anything else but Baba and Baba only. Because ever since she was orphaned, she only had Baba and herself and that was all that mattered.

A week after Baba’s discharge, Hinamori went to the academy. It was nothing short of public shunning. She told a guard to give her letter to Dr. Aizen, but the professor was no longer there.

“Who are you sad for?” Baba asked one afternoon, her frail hands cupping a warm cup of oolong tea. “I think so much had happened while I was asleep, but I only saw that face during your parents’ funeral.”

“I’m sorry Baba.” She still couldn’t forgive herself for doing this to Baba. She was irresponsible, insensitive, uncaring.

Baba reached out to softly pat her head. “My dear, you’re tired.”

She was. She was tired of denying, deconstructing, and reconstructing Dr. Aizen in her head. She was tired of making up excuses for his unreasonable workload, for his weird request to avoid seeing friends so she could be more productive, for seeing through her admiration and taking advantage of it, for using her naivete in the academic field. It was true, after all, that she was not like them. She was a peasant. She didn’t know better. She only had herself to blame.

She was tired. She was tired of pretending she was angry at Hitsugaya, of pretending not to see his pained looks from across the room during the trial, of the defeat on his face when it was decided she would be expelled. She was not angry, but she was confused. She was confused – ever since that afternoon in the yellow daffodil meadow.

Baba pulled her in for a hug, Hinamori’s arms still scared to hold the fragile vessel of her dearest person. But she allowed herself to sob, to let go of all these feelings at once.

“So have you found which bonds to treasure?”

Hinamori never got around to answer Baba’s question as urgent knocks suddenly interrupted their conversation. From the window, she saw that it was Rangiku, Renji, and Rukia, but she didn’t open her door, partly because she was angry for being un-like them and partly because she was afraid of what they thought of her.

“We’re your friends too, Momo.” Rangiku’s voice drifted across the door.

Hinamori was afraid because they were, first and foremost, Hitsugaya’s friends, and they would inevitably take his side. She didn’t think of them as her own.

“We’re your friends, no matter what.” Renji echoed. His voice was still full of energy but also full of indignation. “I don’t care what the academy thinks.”

“You must know,” Rukia started. Out of all three, she may be the most level-headed, so similar with her brother, but Hinamori knew her long enough that Rukia also treasured people close to her. “we know you didn’t do any of the things you confessed to.”

“Hitsugaya wasn’t the informant.” Renji’s voice was cracking. “But you should have already known by now, haven’t you?”

She thought she dried up all her tears. Of course, she knew. Hitsugaya would never do that to her, but she projected all of her fears to him, the fear that it was Dr. Aizen’s doing.

“But you must know he’s leaving.” Rangiku said. “We’re not privy to the details, but he’s leaving tomorrow morning. If you want to clear up all misunderstandings and say your goodbyes, you should come meet him.”

“We’re here for you, Momo. Come and meet us whenever you’re ready.” Rukia never used her nickname until now. “We’ll just have to revise that stupid hierarchy rule of course.”

When she heard the incoming rumble of the train, she dashed out of the compound on her bike and raced to reach Hitsugaya. She was tired of pretending she didn’t care. In fact, she was angry, afraid, and confused. Angry of being left in the dark, afraid of what he thought of her after the trial, confused on his departure. What will she say? Does he hate her? Why was he leaving? When will he come back? She needed answers. She needed to hear his voice. To feel that warm hug one last time.

She heard their collective sighs and their receding footsteps. At the very last minute, she opened her door but were only left with departing shadows. On the ground was a box full of her favorite tea packets. It was pathetic, the way she cried again, the fact that she was still indecisive.

The next morning, she was still unsure of what to do.

But in the middle of winter, Hitsugaya Toushirou disappeared from her life.

----------------------------

It was difficult starting over. Baba regained some of her strength but never returned to its full normality. So Hinamori found a reason to move, to get up in the morning and make breakfast, clean the compound, gather firewood. The routine was a safe space.

But the nights were not. She was sleepless, haunted by vivid nightmares of always giving a hundred percent of herself and getting none of them back. She was floating, untethered, and uncertain.

The trips downtown didn’t help at all, even after months of isolation. While the academy was bounded by a non-disclosure agreement of what went down in the trial, gossip was still bound to leak. After all, they were the Soul Society. So she went in, went out, enduring the stares and the snickers behind her back. The worst that happened was when someone on the second floor of a building threw a box of ripe tomatoes on her head. When she returned the following week, she learned that a red-haired guy, a short girl, and a booby one threatened the streets. For a short while, Hinamori allowed herself to smile.

Seasons came and went. She never heard from Hitsugaya, and there was sparse information from the erratic closed door visits she had with the three Rs. On the fifth spring season, large developments occurred. A science museum was to be built on the meadow of daffodils. Full bloom and shining in their yellow glory, the daffodils gave way to the large wheels of trucks and mechanized backhoe. She stood there, tears lodged on her throat, helpless to see memories being taken away.

It was learning how to breathe again. Like how Baba adjusted to her new set of lungs, Hinamori coped with her new life. Breathing has become a foreign task, like any other else – sleeping, eating watermelon, drinking coffee. And when she had them all down, she progressed to contacting friends. She prepared bouquets for the three Rs during their graduation. For some reason, her excommunication with the academy got lifted, and she was allowed to see them. She never made it past the gate, however, and thought it best to leave them with the guard, but they saw her anyway. They smothered her in a flurry of robes and sniffles, her carefully wrapped bouquets in danger of deforming but all for a good reason.

Then, she made even bigger steps. She mailed all the remaining files of her projects with Aizen to Unohana with a self-written testimony of her true experience. It may not hold weight, but she spoke her truth at the very least. It was time to let go of him, or rather the idea of him.

Baba sat her down one day and gave her a bank passbook.

“Baba?” A familiar feeling clutched at her heart. How come she didn’t see it coming again? “Let’s go to the hospital right now!”

“You silly girl. I am fine.” Baba calmed her down and offered her a cup of tea, her favorite brew. “It’s Hitsugaya’s.”

“What?” She was openly dumbstruck. He didn’t send any form of communication, but he continued sending money?

“He probably thought I needed some for maintenance.” Baba’s eyes were twinkling. She was so fond of the measly boy she took from the streets. She didn’t mind his unruly behavior and would have accepted him if he stayed that way. But her genuine act of acceptance returned a lifetime of favor which Hinamori was grateful for. Hitsugaya never broke his promises.

“I still have some extra. He must be a millionaire or something!” Chuckling, Baba held her hands. “But this, you need to have.”

“What do you mean, Baba? I’m not leaving you.”

“Of course, you won’t. But you need to pursue something that you want, for yourself.”

And that was how she managed to acquire the rundown building near her favorite café. Building on Baba’s connections with farmers and a couple of lessons with senior florists, she opened her flower shop. It was expected that revenues would be down initially, given her prior reputation, but this was a shot she needed to take.

Eventually, sales picked up because of her unique arrangements and how they were preserved longer than most flowers. It was thanks to the spray she concocted from her basic knowledge when she was at the academy. She set aside some of her sales – returning what she owed to Hitsugaya who by then became popular in the academic world.

Unreachable by the day, Hinamori thought to herself. But she still found herself waiting. Each time the winter came, she waited patiently for the snow to melt and give way to the budding blossoms of spring. During summer, she and Baba would prepare lots of watermelons, stocking up on jams for the next cycle of winter. And again, and again, and again. And while she was comfortable in her routine, she found herself still waiting.

----------------------------

This was the spring he came back. He. The youngest postdoctorate professor of the town. The most sought-after scientist in major journals and magazines. The prodigy of the physics world. Nobel Prize just might do a piece on his work on physics. And yet to her he was still her childhood best friend who disappeared during winter ten years ago.

“Toushirou.”

Hitsugaya gave a small smile and took a few steps closer to the counter. “Rangiku said this place is the best flower shop. I didn’t know you’re the owner.”

Probably because you went off the deep end? “I..didn’t know you’re back.”

“You….cut your hair.” Ah, the first thing he noticed.

“It was heavy.” Hinamori’s hands tried to grab scissors and some ribbons, trying to act as if she was busy, but they all fumbled from her grasp. “So what flowers do you need?”

He stood there awkwardly with this strange silence that hang over the both of them. He was a few inches taller than her, his silver hair growing into a mullet, and his face more angled than what she remembered He also wore glasses….which was weird because she knew he had a 20/20 eyesight. But more than that, he was harder to reach than before and yet he was already in front of her.

There was nothing she wanted more than to rush into his arms and welcome her best friend home. Welcome back.

NEXT CHAPTER | 9 OF 12 | THE SPRING HE CAME BACK

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thehereticaldeserthermit · 5 years ago

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𝕆𝕦𝕥 𝕆𝕗 ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕖𝕣 ℚ𝕦𝕖𝕤𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟𝕤

ROLE PLAYER GET TO KNOW YOU PROMPT

Alright TDC Community It’s time for a task,

and this time we’re all going to get to know each other a little better.

Under the cut, you’ll find forty out of character questions split into two parts: OOC about your muses, and OOC about yourself! Answer what you’d like, add more if you’d like.

When you’re done TAG some of your writing partners and keep FUN going.

-there is no pressure to participate

-IF You Are Reading This And You’d Like To Participate Consider Yourself Tagged My Friend!

Much Love,

TheJesseWhoLurks

I tag @lyr-taxidermist @theghostofharar @hurdygurdyskeksis @urskekyagvi @skekmal-the-hunter @skekso-the-emperor @gourdplayer @hedonistschambers @ulvanmaudra @littlebluezoologist @the-wandering-urru @queenofthetides @juliejewel24 @thecastleurru

OOC About Your Character(s)

1. What do you want to get out of playing this character(s)?

The reason I wanted to write for Gra was to meet fellow fans that loved the world of TDC as much as I do, I wanted to find fellow writers. I wanted to steep myself in the fandom. You can easily consider me skeKSis obsessed but I am growing a fondness for their counterparts -slowly ❤

2. Describe your character(s) with three words.

Passionate | Erratic | Trustworthy

3. What made you decide to write this muse?

Originally I was going to pick up The Ritual Master, he’d been my OG fav from the movie BUT Gra kept ... poking me with his scepter? Like; I live in the desert, you live in the desert, Ima recluse, you’re a recluse =we are simpatico. I think The Heretic picked me because he simply would not leave my mind when I considered him as a possibility.

4. If you could change one event in your muse’s life (in their main or canon verse), what would you change?

Canon. I mean they left us kinda hanging there. We really do not know what happened do we? They are simply, just not there anymore. I do not want them to perish, I want them to make it to the finish line and become urSkek. It breaks my heart to think they did not make it.

5. If you could tell your muse one thing, what would you tell them?

I would not say anything, just hug him REALLY tightly and probably not let go until he gives me a chitter-laugh.

6. If you could give your muse one gift, what would you give them?

I would like to give them...ME.

7. If you had to take one positive thing away from your muse, what would you take away?

I do not want to take a positive thing from the fibers that make up Gra. I feel they are very interwoven in his tale. Removing one would make another untether. If I could take away or diminish a bad trait Id have him not be so stubborn and or impatient but then again he would not be Gra now would he?

8. If you could “borrow” one aspect of your muse and apply it to yourself or your own life, what would you borrow?

His determination, passion. Damn son. You get things done.

9. Do you genuinely want your muse to be happy? What do you think would make them most happy in life?

Yes. He’s gotten his ass handed to him, I think he might be owed a slice of peace and happiness. What makes him most happy? He’s already showed me; his relationships whether its friendship, extended family or a lover those are treasures he holds near and dear to his heart.

10. Do you enjoy putting your muse through angst? What do you think would break their heart the most?

Usually I prefer to plot out angst rather then let it completely run a-muck because you never know what your partner is comfortable with, what might trigger them in a detrimental way and simply set fire to a plot unintentionally.

I already know; it literally is ... break his heart.

11. What do you love about your muse?

His dynamic energy, the wild fire, the mystical chaos, the creativity is off the charts. His sharp distinguished features, the way he looks shamanistically feral as compared to his brethren and their Garthic garb. His use of the color red. His scratchy rasp of a voice. His laugh.

12. What do you hate about your muse?

He is a high maintenance muse, he is demanding and screeches loudly for what he wants.

13. What about your muse amuses you?

The fact that he is a skeKSis. This brings a whole slew of challenges to the table for a writer. Case in point, I was writing a reply one day and I went to put something in along the lines of ‘he arched his brow and blah blah’ THEN he hit me! He has no eyebrows to arch, ahhh! I have to stop and think about how to write out expressive traits or reactions that are not of the usual human reaction tone.

14. What about your muse makes you sad?

How fragile his heart really is after all the shit he’s endeared.

15. How would you describe your muse to someone about to meet them, in person, for the first time?

Get Ready For A Wild SURPRISE!

16. Would you like your muse as a person if you met them in real life?

Yes, I like creative souls. I cherish them.

17. In what ways are you better than your muse? In what ways are they better than you?

I do not think I am or he is better than the other.

But I will say he is a handsome devil, for a skeKSis.

18. Why do you think you connect to your muse?

Creative. Outcast.

19. What aspect of your muse’s personality is most important to you? What aspect of your muse’s personality do you think is most important to them? Is it the same? Why or why not?

His passion and drive. I’d say its the same answer for us both. All of the accomplishments he tackled probably had their stacks of obstacles with each to-do. You’d have to have an unending supply of passion and drive to keep going, to complete all. He really is a work-a-holic and a busy body skek.

20. Has your character(s) changed over the time that you have been playing them? How have they changed?

Not yet but I am sure he will, creative liberties will be taken since I only have a a episode or two to work with -am I right?

About You!

1. What is your name?

Jesse.

2. What is your profession?

secret shit.

3. What do you do to relax?

I write. Play video games. Naps are divine. Hot coffee and watch YT videos. DOodle. Desert combing walks. Long hot baths. Organize things xD

4. What is your favorite treat (desert)?

All kinds, I’m not picky. I love me some chocolate lately.

5. Favorite movie

Too many to list. Its October right now. All I want is Hocus Pocus, some Harry Potter and Practical Magick at the moment. Tis the season.

6. Favorite book

I do not think I have a favorite. BUT I will admit that I have a copy of The Dark Crystal that I STOLE FROM A LIBRARY YEARS AGO! I have kept it all this time, its falling apart and its aged with beauty and I adore it ❤ I also have a Jim Henson book about puppetry and his works, there is a page from TDC and if my memory serves me right it has the concept art of skekGra in it sooo sooo I was looking at skekGra YEARS AGO AND HAD NO CLUE the conjunction that would line up in the future! I really neeed to go find this book but its in a storage shed that will be a fresh hell to get to =[ *

7. Favorite vacation spot

Anywhere where its either very green and or by some body of water. Ocean, river, lake. Yes, good. -not very many humans around save for present company reading thiiiis.

8. Favorite Disney movie

Are you kidding me? Too many to list, although I will say The Sword In The Stone did play a part in Gra’s Crystal Skimmer named Archimedes after the grouchy old owl.

9. How did you first get into role playing?

Years ago. I started writing on face book. I wrote for a pirate believe it or not, he was my first muse and he holds special place in my black heart and probably always will. But I am disinclined to acquiesce the gift of further details about this scurvy cursed muse, Ha!

10. What was your first platform? If it was something other than Tumblr, what made you get into Tumblr?

It was face book, before they got all crazy about accounts and security. I moved over to tumblr because writers were incredibly rude and rapid fire RP-ers. One liner sentences and I’m like NOPE I need a novel length.

11. What’s a grammar rule you find yourself breaking or ignoring a lot?

Sometimes I have a touch of dyslexia, sometimes I typo, sometimes I am too tired to proof read, sometimes I make blunders. But I tend to focus on my mistakes rather then other peoples. I just go with the flow, I just write no matter what their level of ‘proper grammar’ IS because I’d like to think that maybe they are just starting out, maybe they will fall in love with writing and maybe they will be the next author who creates a world we all fall in love with and want to immerse ourselves in.

12. Are there any languages besides English in which you think you could comfortably roleplay?

I do not RP in other languages. However I did have a muse at one time who was French, I would throw in little phrases but it was never entirely done in French and I do have a British muse at the moment, so again I will use slang and little sayings to make them well rounded as best as I can. Those are just little details I like to include that many others might skip on but I thrive for deets.

I do however have role play writing partners that are from ALL over the world which is amazing to me.

13. Do you listen to music while your write?

ALOT. I have tracks specifically for skekGra, that take me to his frame of mind. Even TDC soundtrack at times, the puppet show song and the blue flame part 2 are on replay a lot.

14. Are you a morning, day, evening, or night writer?

I am all over the place. My life is very hectic. I’d like to say its usually in the afternoon of evening for me, the house is settled down and things are silent but thats not always how it works out. Oftentimes I will sit down and write a reply or two, then dip to do mundane human things that adults do, then return back for a few more replies.

15. How does tiredness affect your writing?

Kills it. The weekends I work long hours therefor my brain is like WHAAAT.

16. What is your biggest obstacle to writing every day, if time doesn’t count?

It is always TIME. Sometimes stress levels can be an obstacle too, no lie. If something major is going on, I just throw my hands up like ‘I got nothin’’ and thats that.

17. How many drafts is a paralyzing amount?

Oh damn. Been there done that. I am much more picky about it nowadays. I try to limit skekGra to a certain number of replies because he also has to allow room for other muses.

Currently: Gra has ten replies on tumblr -no actually 11 &&& 4 on discord. I am two shakes away from cutting HIM OFF! lol.

18. Is there anything character-wise or writing style-wise that you can’t stand?

I’m open to different characters, I have written with a lot. I love a writer who has style, I appreciate the effort.

Etiquette, manners and consideration are oftentimes LACKING as of late.

19. What kind of anonymous questions are your favorite?

ANYTHING as long as it is not anon HATE.

20. What is your weakest point in writing? Angst, fluff, dialogue, etc.?

T I M E not having enough time to write the angst fluff and dialogue, smut too lets be real. It really is a bummer to me when I do not have the time, I work, I have a a lotta responsibilities, my life is like a hurricane a lot of the time so TIME is my weakness, oftentimes I am super J E L L O of people who are online all day, every day, always there I’m envious and I get writers FOMO which makes me laugh but its so damn true I could ugly laugh cry about it.

#OOC: Post Is Out Of Character #||| Just a lil get to know me thingy |||#the dark crystal #tdc age of resistance #skeksis #skekgra #skekgra the conqueror #skekgra the heretic

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cherryamoureuse · 5 years ago

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paper rings | peter parker (soulmate au)

Tomorrow was your seventeenth birthday. You were finally going to be linked to your soulmate. Everyone’s connection was different. Some saw specific colors, others shared emotions. Your parents had been the latter. The bond does not show itself until both soulmates are seventeen. You will admit that your heart was yearning and hoping that it would be one specific person. Peter Parker. You were in the same chemistry class as the honey-eyed brunette. The pair of you have never exchanged more than a few words to each other in the two years that you had been classmates, much to your dismay. From the second that you had laid your eyes on him freshman year, you had been his. Today, walking into school had been anxiety ridden for you. While on the train to school, your head was taken up with the thought of soulmates.

Would your infatuation with Peter suddenly disappear? What if it didn’t? Wouldn’t your soulmate eventually find out your affection was so focused on someone else? What if Peter was your soulmate?

No, that is just wishful thinking on your part. Walking up the stone steps, you reached the entrance of Midtown High. As cliche as it sounds, you felt your heart skip a few beats as you walked through the double doors. Peter was standing by his locker, shifting through stacks of paper, with a pen loosely hanging between his lips. Feeling your stare, he looked up and gave you a lopsided smile that wrapped your heart in warmth. Quickly, your eyes flutter towards the grounds as you feel your cheeks heat up at being caught. Walking past him, you flash him a smile as you go to find MJ, who would surely be waiting for you by your locker. You greet her with a flustered smile and she eyes you suspiciously.

“What’s up with you? Your cheeks are the color of strawberries.” She lifts a finger and pokes at your left cheek.

“It’s nothing.” You assure her as you hide your face behind your locker door.

“Mhm, this wouldn't have anything to do with a certain nerd named Peter Parker, now would it? She says with a smirk lighting up her features. “You know, if you just talked to him you could already be his girlfriend.”

“As if, MJ.” You scoff at her. You and Peter are barely acquaintances at this point in time. He would smile at you when you make eye contact and make small talk at the science tables, but that was the extent of it. You were his chemistry seat partner, that’s all.

“What do you mean? Never forget that you’re the one that’s out of his league.”

“Sure,” You sigh. MJ had always seen the best in people, even if she was a tad guarded. “Tomorrow is my birthday anyways. I’m gonna find my soulmate.” You do smile a little at the thought. It is important to be independent, but it would be nice to find a forever with someone.

The two of you walk to English and take your seats.

The day passes by, and you are finally on your way home. Your apartment was empty, there was a note on the counter from your parents saying they wouldn’t be home for dinner and that there was money on the table for pizza. They were rarely ever home, due to their busy work schedules, but you were used to it. Kicking off your shoes, you make your way to your bedroom to start your homework. As the time goes by, you try not to stress about your soulmate situation. The closer it got to 12, the more anxious you became. Finally, the moment had come as your clock switched from pm to am. You let out a breath and waited. Nothing happened. You didn’t feel any different. Furrowing your brows, you go to the mirror to search for some marking, which was the most common form of soulmate matching. There was nothing to be found. You sat on your bed hoping to feel anything from your soulmate’s end. All you could feel and hear was silence. Maybe your soulmate hadn’t turned seventeen yet. Then a terrible thought had occurred to you. What if you had no soulmate? It was rare but there had been a few cases of people who had no bond. You were reaching all kinds of scenarios in your head when you heard your parents walk through the front door. You rush under the covers and pretend to be asleep, so they don’t ask you questions that would make you cry in your fragile state. You hear the door open and hushed whispers are shared, before it is closed once again. Falling asleep, you try not to focus on the worst case scenarios.

You are woken up by a loud voice. Startled, you glance over at your clock to see that it is 3am. There are two voices speaking about salicylic acid? Confusion and alarm are at the forefront of your emotions. There was no radio on, yet the voices continue to converse about science. Opening your window, you stick your head out and try to find the source, but the voices seemed to be directly in your head. An epiphany strikes you. It has to be your soulmate bond. A smile lights up your features as you finally understand. It was a rare connection to have. Music. You and your soulmate could hear whatever music- or in your case, podcast- the other was listening to. An excited giggle forces it way out of your throat as you listen to scientific procedures. Why your soulmate would be up at 3am and listening to a science podcast was beyond you, but you were relieved to know that you were not without a soulmate. You thought about putting on your own music to let them know that you were there, but you didn’t want to disturb your other half. Your eyelids grow heavy and you are once again drifting back to sleep with thoughts of the periodic table.

Waking up at 6 am on a Saturday with just 4 hours of sleep under your belt was not difficult to do when you were excited for the prospect of hearing whatever your soulmate heard. There had been no new sounds in your mind since this morning, but you knew that if you began listening to a song, they would hear it and be as surprised as you had been. You had spent the morning racking your brain for the perfect song to play your soulmate. Nothing too heavy, you wanted a soft introduction. Searching your Spotify playlist, you found the perfect song. Holding your breath, you press play on Taylor Swift’s Invisible String. The intro starts and you wait. The song plays and finishes without interruption. You don’t play anything, hoping for some sort of response. Your heart is beating out of your chest as the same opening intro is played back before stopping. It worked, they had heard you! Excitement coursed through your veins. Freaking out, you look for another song to play for your soulmate. After half an hour, there had been no response. You were disappointed, but you brushed it off as your soulmate just getting busy. Around 8, you decided to take a quick shower. Normally, you would be playing music and singing in the shower, but you didn’t want to bother or annoy your soulmate. The silence was awkward for you. Brushing your hair, you decided to throw caution to the wind and play your everyday playlist. The soft sound of Clairo’s Bags fills the room. You keep the volume low as you hum and sing along. Then, Paper Rings starts playing and you can’t help but turn it up a little and sing into your hairbrush. You finish your nightly routine and head to bed. The weekend went by with no sounds on your soulmate’s end. It was frustrating to say the least, but you tried not to get worked up about it. Lover had been your album of choice for the weekend. Paper Rings had been on repeat for almost 2 days straight. You couldn’t help it. The song just elevated your mood. And with the mountain of assignments you had to do, you needed the boost. You popped your headphones in and started your walk to school. Taylor Swift accompanies you through your subway stops. Walking through the doors, your eyes immediately go to Peter’s locker. He’s standing and talking to Ned. He looks up when you enter and waves at you. You take out your headphones and pause your music to wave back at him. His hand stops its movement as soon as you begin waving back. He seems to be frozen in place as his mouth parts in disbelief. You drop your hand and your smile, thinking that you had done something wrong and cringe internally. Wrapping up your headphones, you walk past Peter, whose eyes are following you. His expression stays the same. Turning the corner, you run to MJ, telling her about your soulmate and your bizarre interaction with Peter.

“Wait,” she interrupts your rambling about how Peter reacted to your wave. “You waved at Peter? That’s so unlike you. Maybe that’s why he freaked.”

Thinking about it, Peter doesn’t usually wave at you when you walk in. Normally the two of you would exchange only a smile in the mornings.

Sliding into your seat in Chemistry, your leg bounces as you psych yourself up to talk to Peter. You wanted to get past the shy responses you always gave him. Having a soulmate had built up your confidence and you were ready to try and be Peter’s friend. You catch his eyes as he walks through the door frame and into the classroom. Your heart flutters, but you will the feeling away. You had a soulmate out there and it was not Peter Parker. This time it is him who averts his gaze and blushes. He walks down the aisle to his normal seat next to you. For some reason, you are hyper aware of his proximity today and you want nothing more than to melt into his side. You shake the thought from your head. What is up with you today? You turn to him.

“Hi, Peter.” Your voice sounds small amongst the loudness of the room, but his head perks up to look at you.

“Hi, Y/N. Wow, you’ve never been the one to talk first.” He laughs, but stops as he sees your face fall. You hadn’t wanted to seem standoffish, you were just painfully shy around him.

“I’m sorry, I-I” You blush a scarlet red as you stumble over your words.

“N-No, don’t apologize. It was just surprising. I’m glad you’re talking to me,” He assures you with a gentle, close-lipped smile and a hand on your arm. Warmth spreads around the area where his palm meets your cardigan. You could sigh at the feeling. “Happy Birthday, by the way. Big seventeen.” He rubs his neck.

“Yeah, thank you. I didn’t know you knew about my birthday.”

“MJ told me.” You nod at his rushed explanation and a comfortable silence washes over. Peter breaks it by asking you a question. “Sorry if it’s personal, but did you find out what your soulmate bond was? Y-you don’t have to answer, I’m just curious.”

Before you could answer, the teacher began explaining the assignment for today. You and Peter finished the paper just as the bell rang, signalling the end of the class period. Peter offers to walk with you to your locker. You nod in acceptance. You break the silence once you reach your locker.

“Um I did get my soulmate bond by the way, it’s bizarre. Mine is a music connection, but my soulmate has only listened to one science podcast so far. It was at 3 in the morning too.” You laugh and look over to see Peter looking at you with the same expression from this morning. You see him duck down to pull his phone out of his backpack and frantically untangle his headphones.

His movements were startling and you reached a hand out to his shoulder. “Are you okay, Peter?”

He doesn’t respond. His tongue pokes out of the side of his mouth, as he concentrates on his task. He finally untangles the knots and plugs in the wire, with the headphones situated in his ear. He taps away at the screen. All of a sudden, you hear the all too familiar opening of Paper Rings, your song of choice this past weekend. You gasp as Peter looks up at you and turns his phone around showing you the cover art to none other than Taylor Swift’s Lover album. You reach down and pause the song. Silence falls between the two of you as you try and process what had just happened.

“Y-You.. You’re m-my soulmate?” You know you must look insane, but there is so much happening in your mind that it’s a miracle you can even form the words.

Peter watches you carefully as he stands up. “Y-yeah, I mean, I had a suspicion from the weekend and this morning, but yeah. I h-hoped it was you.” He admits shyly.

Your heart could burst. Here was Peter Parker, the boy you had been hoping was your soulmate, admitting that he had hoped the same thing. Here was Peter Parker, your soulmate. Before you can even process the words, they are coming out of your mouth in quick succession, “Can I kiss you?”

He seems a bit startled but recovers and gives a small nod. You reach up to wrap your arms around his neck and delicately press your lips to his. He is hesitant at first, but soon leans into the kiss and places his arms around your waist, bringing you closer to him. You pull away from lack of air, but press your foreheads together. Peter laughs.

You look up at him and smile. “What?”

“You really like Taylor Swift, don’t you? I’m tired of hearing that song bouncing around in my head. I don’t know how someone could listen to the same song for so long.”

“Shut up. You didn’t even listen to any music at all.”

“I didn’t want to disturb you. Plus, you listen to enough music for the both of us.”

He leans down again to place another kiss on your lips. His arms are still wrapped tightly around you. You were perfectly happy to stay in his embrace forever. Thanking the heaven’s for whoever was responsible for making him the perfect match for you, you kiss him back.

I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with paper rings

I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this

darling, you're the one I want

In paper rings in picture frames in all my dreams

You're the one I want

#peter parker x reader #peter parker imagine #peter parker #tom holland #tom holland imagine #spiderman imagine #spiderman x reader #peter parker x y/n #spiderman x y/n #peter parker x you #tom holland x reader

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markwatkinsconsumerguide · 4 years ago

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Consumer Guide / No.110 / Howzat?! Cricket broadcaster and magazine editor, Annie Chave, batting the questions from Mark Watkins.

MW : Describe your favourite room in your house...

AC : My new office. It is small with a daybed and a desk. It includes a shelf with my County Cricket Matters magazines & envelopes for posting, a bookshelf of cricket books, several photos of the Taunton pitch and one of Marcus Trescothick. It also has a really precious photo of me with my dad watching cricket when I’m about 8 years old.

From my window, I can see the hills outside Exeter. I’ve painted the room a light grey and it is usually bathed in sunlight. I love the sense of calm I feel when I shut myself in my office.

MW : When setting out to watch County Cricket, what essentials do you usually carry in your bag?

AC : I always have the current book I’m reading, my binoculars and a warm layer. More recently I have my phone and I have a recording device so that I can interview people. I will now always have backdated & current copies of County Cricket Matters but I’m yet to go to a county match since I’ve been doing my magazine so I don’t know how many to take.

MW : What other essentials are usually provided at the ground?

AC: Cricket is the main essential. Tea, cake and beer a close second and familiar faces a third. But a sense of calm, of solace and of healing is also right up there.

MW : What is the most picturesque ground you've visited?

AC : Without a doubt Lynton & Lynmouth. It is a valley in North Devon that is right by the sea with steep hillsides surrounding the pitch where goats precariously balance at incongruous angles. It is a stunning and timeless setting.

MW : Which ground has the best surface?

AC : Taunton, of course, because it is unique and rarely produces a dull game!

MW : When summer is over, what is your cricket substitute?

AC: Nothing substitutes cricket. There is little to compare with the sense of joy as March turns into April and I find myself anticipating the season ahead. Since I have begun editing County Cricket Matters I have been able to maintain a connection with cricket over the winter and I value that hugely. I also do a lot of reading and writing to fill in the time.

MW : Just before a new cricket season begins how do you usually prepare?

AC : I buy my Playfair Cricket Annual and Wisden and I love The Cricketer round up of the counties. I also choose a county fantasy cricket team at CricketXI.com and I’ll do a lot of reading up about county signings and retirements so that I am prepared for my new County Cricket Natters podcast, which is a “Match Of The Day” type show that rounds up the week’s championship games.

MW : How useful are you with bat & ball?

AC : Well, I’m worse than useless with the bat. I try to hit everything to the boundary and I can’t get bat on ball. But I have been known to bowl a bit and I’ve upset a few men’s fragile ego by knocking their stumps over with my straight medium pace. My claim to fame is that when I briefly played women’s cricket for Gunnersbury Women’s Cricket Club, I fluked the wicket of Charlotte Edwards, when she was brilliantly caught off my long-hop. She was only 14 at the time.

MW : ...and how about the rest of your family?

AC: Well now, that’s a question. My father played cricket and kept wicket until he was 76. Nimble and fast behind the stumps right up until he retired. He was a decent bat and when he was younger was a useful seam-up bowler who took a lot of wickets.

My two brothers still play. The younger a decent left-handed bat and very good keeper – the elder a slow bowler who has claimed many wickets and is a good man in to bat for the draw.

My husband is a very useful opener who could have played at a higher level than he did. He began his bowling life as a fast bowler but in later years he became a useful off-break bowler and one hell of a slip fielder. Now in his late fifties he still opens the batting and often with our son.

My son is a left-handed bat who plays the long game, starting steadily and able to accelerate at an alarming pace. He is also a nifty right-arm, off-break bowler who varies his pace and gets a good bit of bounce.

So yes, a fair amount of cricket in our family.

MW : Who is your current cricket heartthrob?

AC : I don’t really go in for heartthrobs but out of current players then I’d go for Jofra Archer. Past players - Viv Richards. Such brazen talent.

MW : Which cricketer gives you the most heartache?!

AC : Toss-up between Moeen Ali and Jos Buttler because I feel they both have to always justify their test place and yet they are so hugely talented.

MW : You are Test selector for the day, what would be your (current) England eleven?

AC : This is a really hard question because it depends if we’re playing in England or against a team of left-handers or at a particular ground etc. I think I’ll make it a team to play in England and I’ll imagine that the team :

Rory Burns

Dom Sibley (don’t like watching him bat though!)

Zak Crawley (a classy bat.)

Joe Root

Ben Stokes (after Headingly in 2019 there is no explanation.)

Jos Buttler (I think a test side with Jos in is a strong Test side but I recognise he’s not the best keeper – that would definitely be Ben Foakes – however, in England conditions I think Jos is good enough and the impetus in the batting is important.)

Chris Woakes (under used and underrated.)

Jack Leach/Moeen Ali (I literally cannot choose between them so dependent on if we need to strengthen the batting.)

Jofra Archer

Stuart Broad

Jimmy Anderson

MW : How would you sell County Cricket to the uninitiated?

AC : I think anything that has such a rich history behind it is worth experiencing. Each ground has its own multi-layered past where momentous games have taken place and iconic players have broken records. The setting of each and every one of the 18 county grounds is unique and full of promise. I love that sense of past glories that help to define its character and I’m aware that each match I attend could bring a moment of magic or history at any point.

But County Cricket is unique because of its relaxed and friendly atmosphere. You have the ceremony, the classy players, the thrill of the contest, the changing conditions, the double innings, the sense of camaraderie in the crowd but you also have a quieter more respectful experience. You are able to wander around, change seats, chat with friends and with strangers, go to the bar without fighting your way to an endless queue and you have time to daydream, time to read your paper and have a break for lunch.

There is also a great rapport between player and spectator because the pace is slower and the drama comes in short bursts so the player is more relaxed; the spectator better able to engage. There is nothing more life affirming than time alone at a county match.

MW : What radio do you listen to in the car?

AC : BBC Radio 4 for Drama, BBC 5 Live for Sport & BBC 6 Music for my musical requirements and always cricket, or football, if it’s on ; Exeter City is my football team, but I’m partial to Arsenal too.

MW : What was the last good DVD. movie and TV show you particularly enjoyed watching?

AC : As with my reading matter I tend to enjoy science fiction and detective thrillers.

I think the last good DVD I watched was 1917.

It feels like forever since I’ve been to the cinema and I can’t really remember what I enjoyed there last, but it would have been a Star Wars film I suspect.

The last TV series I really enjoyed was Firefly.

MW : Where can we keep in touch?

AC : County Cricket Matters has a website https://www.countycricketmatters.com/ where you can also purchase magazines at the shop

It also has a Facebook group County Cricket Matters and a Twitter Account @matterscounty

I’m on Twitter @anniechave and on LinkedIn and Facebook.

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seasaltmemories · 5 years ago

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Toilet-bound Hanako-kun Review/Analysis

Wow I can’t believe I am actually talking about a piece of media that is actually still new and relevant. I’m in the grand scheme of things tackling this really early considering the last episode didn’t air all that long ago, but for a weeks now I’ve had a lot to say about this show. And considering the number of mutuals who have slowly jumped on board to watch this, I’m going to lean heavily on the analysis part of this format. So beware of spoilers.

That said let’s get into that summary:

The famous "Seven Wonders" that every school seems to have are a staple of Japanese urban legends. One of the most well-known of these tales is that of Hanako-san: the ghost of a young girl who haunts the school's bathrooms.

Kamome Academy has its own version of Hanako-san's legend. Rumors claim that if one successfully manages to summon Hanako-san, she will grant her summoner any wish. Lured by the gossip, many people have tried to call upon her, yet every attempt has failed. However, when Nene Yashiro, a girl hoping for romantic fortune, dares to summon Hanako-san, she discovers that the rumored "girl" is actually a boy!

After a series of unfortunate events involving Nene's romantic desires, she is unwillingly entangled in the world of the supernatural, becoming Hanako-kun's assistant. Soon, she finds out about Hanako-kun's lesser-known duty: maintaining the fragile balance between mortals and apparitions.

So honestly just going off of plot itself, I doubt Hanako-kun caught many people’s eye. However aside from the beautiful artstyle which everyone and their mother has praised, what gets me is the amount of charm it has. Almost every character is immensely likeable, and much of the early setting up period is centered around letting them just all interact in cute manners with each other. There is a clear romantic thread between Hanako and Yashiro from the start, and there is little fear about showcasing their physical affection for one another, so I could have been find with the show doing nothing if I just got to see them hold hands and solve mysteries together.

However around Episode 5 was when I really began to love the show for its character writing. And to fully understand give me a moment to wax about my girl Yashiro.

Considering whose name is in the title, it could be easy to see Yashiro as simple a normal viewpoint character to act as the outsider who slowly learns about the supernatural world. A typical shounen female lead who is nice and caring and wins over people by just being such a cinnamon roll

Yashiro is not that type of girl. Yashiro at any given time is a walking disaster falling apart at any given moment, and honestly really earns her place as the protagonist of the show. She is insecure, in love with the idea of love, honestly doesn’t even have many friends, and definitely jumps to conclusions way too quickly. Yet she is also reflective, curious, genuinely invested in her relationships, She’s probably one of the most realistic teenage weird girl I’ve encountered in a long time, and the show definitely has fun letting her be the comedic relief at times yet also will take time to actually explore her inner life.

By the 3/4th point of the first episode she begins to understand a lot of hopeless romantic tendencies come from a terribly low self-esteem, and while over the series she even calls out that tendency a few times when she sees it in others, in episode 5, after getting a surprise kiss from Hanako, she tries and unravel her feelings. And while at first she doesn’t consider herself that attracted to Hanako as it seems more and more like he has a crush on her, she talks herself into having a crush on him.

And while predictably everything turns out to be a misunderstanding (including that kiss) the show lets Yashiro actually sit in her disappointment and embarrassment. That entire episode I was worried that she was going to get her heart broken and teasing Hanako would just twist the knife further, after all the only person to blame was her own over-active imagination, but instead he comforts her.

That was the first time I realize the show could really pull out some great emotions. And while up to around episode 8 it continues to deliver the emotions (Mitsuba and Kou in general also have that careful touch to their writing) the world and plot blows up so quickly that I feel the second half of the show does start to show some cracks.

This might be controversial, but I find the weakest part of the show to be Tsukasa, Hanako’s crazy evil twin he murdered back when they were both alive. He reminds me a lot of Yuri from Arc V, a chaotic villain who mugs it up for the camera and usually ends up as a fan favorite of sorts. While I can be enjoy and even like those characters, when they hog the spotlight in fanon and sometimes even canon, they overstay their welcome for me. Not much is known about him or his relationship with Hanako beyond what I’ve already stated, and I think there is a lot of interesting stuff that could be learned from exploring him, as is he mostly shows up to stir up shit and disappears without much answers. While I get the mystery will probably be a series long thing and this is a 12 episode anime of a much longer-running manga, part of what made the first half so good was the tight focus on Yashiro. As the stakes ramped up I worried that her normal mundane problems would get pushed to the side.

I hear some of this might be due to the anime playing around with the order of arcs in the source material, which might also explain that much faster pacing, and while I was still enjoying my time, I worried those character-focused beats were going to be farther in between. Especially as Hanako and Yashiro previous easiness around each other had started to fade away in light of recent plot seriousness

But this finale kinda reminded me again of what I loved about the show so much, in that after a huge bittersweet event we get Yashiro reevaluating her relationship with Hanako once more and while accepting she doesn’t understand every thing about him, wanting to do the best she can.

Again it isn’t the most conclusive ending bc it is an unfinished adaptation, but while not the most thematically rich piece of media I’ve fallen in love with, that last bit really ended things on a high note. Rather that rec something for how deep and fascinating I find it, I love this show for how it makes me smile and just oozes this unrefined yet oh so eagerness for connection. More than ever before have I wanted to follow up on the source material of something, and while I can’t quite predict where it will go or if it will keep up its momentum, what the series has delivered already will be worth it.

#seasalt talks #hanako kun #my reviews #there is a lot of stuff I didn't get to #but if it isn't obvious i love yashiro a lot #Everyone else is wonderful too and I can give more specific thoughts later #but yeah this is me dealing with my weekly dose of serotonin ending

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nationalparkposters · 5 years ago

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Visiting Dry Tortugas National Park

Visiting Dry Tortugas National Park: Some 70 miles west of Key West Florida, in the Gulf of Mexico, lies one of North America's most inaccessible national parks. Renowned for pirate legends, shipwrecks, and sheer unspoiled beauty, Dry Tortugas National Park harbors unrivaled coral reefs and marine life, an annual birding spectacle, and majestic Fort Jefferson, the largest masonry stronghold in the Western Hemisphere. Getting There Accessible only by boat or seaplane, just 60,000 visitors make it to Dry Tortugas National Park each year. Compare that to the more than 330 million people who visited America's national parks last year. But it's really no surprise when you consider what's involved just getting there. The jumping off point is Key West, Florida, and from there, you can choose between an all-day boat ride, and half- or full-day seaplane trips, assuming you don't have your own vessel. Pre-Flight When I visited Dry Tortugas National Park, I opted for the seaplane flight and checked in at the Key West Seaplane Adventures office at 7:30 for an 8:00 am flight. Even though it was late March, the sun was just rising, and filtered by wisps of pink and orange clouds. When the remaining nine passengers arrived, we received our briefing, were introduced to our pilot, and then walked out on to the tarmac together to board the DHC-3 DeHavilland Turbine Otter Amphibian. The plane can carry 10 passengers plus the pilot…and when the co-pilot seat was offered up, I literally jumped at the opportunity! Our pilot has been flying to and from Dry Tortugas for years. He would make five trips to and from Dry Tortugas that day…and after dropping us off, his early morning return flight to Key West would be a solo one. Ready for Takeoff Once we had our seat belts fastened, and perhaps more importantly, our headphones on, the pilot began to narrate our early morning adventure as we taxied out on to the runway. I fired up my video camera…and before I knew it we were airborne heading due east into the morning sun, and just as quickly banking south, then west for a bird's eye view of Key West. It was only then that I had the exhilarating realization I would be setting down in a place I'd only been able to conjure in my imagination — turquoise waters, green sea turtles, bright coral, frigate birds, shipwrecks, and a coastal fortress some 170 years old. The co-pilot's seat offered the perfect view of Key West, its hotels, Duvall Street and Mallory Square, which quickly faded from view. The pilot pumped some music into our headphones…though I wasn't quite sure what to make of his first selection: Tom Petty's “Free Fallin'”! Flying at at 130 knots, we were quickly over an area called the “Flats,” a body of shallow water just 3–5 feet deep extending almost 20 miles to the west. Flying at just 500 feet above the water, these shallows are teeming with Loggerhead turtles and you could clearly see dozens of them swimming about as we cruised overhead. 25 miles out, we flew directly over Marquesas Islands, a coral atoll…and then over an area called the “Quicksands.” Here the water is 30 feet deep with a sea bed of constantly shifting sand dunes. This is where treasure hunter Mel Fisher found the Spanish Galleons Antocha and Margarita — and more than a half a billion dollars of gold and silver strewn across an eight mile area. They continue to work the site, and even today, there are regular finds of huge Spanish Emeralds. But it wasn't long from my vantage point in the cockpit before I could begin to make out Fort Jefferson on Garden Key, and further west, the lighthouse on Loggerhead Key. Fort Jefferson, a massive but unfinished coastal fortress, is the largest brick masonry structure in the Americas. Composed of over 16 million bricks, the building covers 16 acres. Florida was acquired from Spain (1819–1821) by the United States, which considered the 75 mile stretch connecting the Gulf Coast and Atlantic Ocean important to protect, since anyone who occupied the area could seize control of the trade routes along the Gulf Coast. Construction of Fort Jefferson began on Garden Key in 1847, and although more than $250,000 had been spent by 1860, the fort was never finished. As the largest 19th century American masonry coastal fort, it also served as a remote prison facility during the Civil War. The most famous inmate was Dr. Samuel Mudd, who set the leg of John Wilkes Booth following the assassination of President Lincoln. Mudd was convicted of conspiracy and was imprisoned on the Dry Tortugas from 1865 to 1869. The fort continued to serve as a military prison until 1874. Almost There… Our pilot banked the De Havilland to the right, providing a spectacular view of the islands and Fort Jefferson, heading the seaplane into the wind for the smoothest landing I've ever experienced — on land or sea — gently skimming the surface, and we glided effortlessly across the turquoise waters and headed towards shore. One more roar of the engines, a quick turn, and we were up on the beach ready to disembark. We arrived about 8:30 AM…and aside from the 10 passengers on board, a half dozen campers at one end of the Garden Key, and a few National Park Service employees, we had the island to ourselves. As I watched the seaplane take off, heading back to Key West, it struck me just how isolated we were in this remote ocean wilderness. I imagined the islands didn't look much different to Spanish explorer Juan Ponce de León, credited for discovering the islands in 1531. He named them Las Tortugas, or “The Turtles,” as the islands and surrounding waters were aswarm with loggerhead , hawksbill, leatherback, and green turtles. For nearly three hundred years, pirates raided not only passing ships, but relied on turtles for meat and eggs and also pilfered the nests of roosting sooty and noddy terns. Nautical charts began to show that The Tortugas were dry — due to the lack of fresh water — and eventually the islands were renamed as The Dry Tortugas. Taking advantage of the early morning light, I headed inside the fort, making my way up the spiral staircase, and stepped out of the old Garden Key lighthouse built in 1825. The lighthouse is no longer in use, since the “new” 167 foot tall lighthouse on Loggerhead Key, completed in 1858, continues to flash its beacon to mariners, warning of the shallow waters. The view from atop of Fort Jefferson provided a spectacular 360 degree panorama. And besides the few spits of land that make up the park, there was nothing but sky and sea in every direction. About the Park Dry Tortugas National Park, situated at the farthest end of the Florida Keys, is closer to Cuba than to the American mainland. A cluster of seven islands, composed mostly of sand and coral reefs, just 93 of the park's 64,000 acres are above water. The three easternmost keys are simply spits of white coral sand, while 49-acre Loggerhead Key, three miles out, marks the western edge of the island chain. The park's sandy keys are in a constant state of flux — shaped by tides and currents, weather and climate. In fact, four islands completely disappeared between 1875 and 1935, a testament to the fragility of the ecosystem. The Dry Tortugas are recognized for their near-pristine natural resources including seagrass beds, fisheries, and sea turtle and bird nesting habitat. The surrounding coral reefs make up the third-largest barrier reef system outside of Australia and Belize. President Franklin D. Roosevelt established Fort Jefferson National Monument under the Antiquities Act on January 4, 1935. It was expanded to it's current size in 1983, when the monument was re-designated by an act of Congress as Dry Tortugas National Park on October 26, 1992. Its charter: to protect the island and marine environment, to preserve Fort Jefferson and submerged cultural resources such as shipwrecks. Just 100 yards or so from Fort Jefferson is Bush Key. Home to a diverse collection of birds that frequent the islands, it features a mix of mangrove, sea oats, bay cedar, sea grape and prickly pear cactus, reflecting the original character of the islands. A great wildlife spectacle occurs each year between February and September, when as many as 100,000 sooty terns travel from the Caribbean Sea and west-central Atlantic Ocean to nest on the islands of the Dry Tortugas. Brown noddies, roseate terns, double-crested cormorants, brown pelicans and the Magnificent frigatebird, with its 7-foot wingspan, breed here as well. Although Bush Key was closed to visitors when I visited, hundreds, if not thousands of birds filled the skies and the sounds of their screeches and calls filled the otherwise tranquil surroundings. There is no water, food, bathing facilities, supplies, or public lodging (other than camping on Garden Key) in the park. All visitors, campers, and boaters are required to pack out whatever they pack in, so the National Park Service created a wi-fi hotspot — only at the dock — where you can scan a QR code and download a variety of PDFs to your phone or tablet. It's an idea that's bound to catch on with so many mobile devices, reducing the need to print (and throw away) paper brochures. Inside Fort Jefferson, a small visitor's center has a few exhibits and shows a short video. I stepped across the entranceway, and found an equally small office that houses the National Park Service employees who maintain and manage the park. Some of the best snorkeling in North America Although I was only on the half-day seaplane trip, I still had enough time for a quick swim and snorkel on the west side of Garden Key. In the late 1800s, the US Navy built piers and coaling warehouses for refueling, but strong storms destroyed them, leaving only their underpinnings. These pilings, and the deeper water of the dredged channel, now offer an excellent opportunity to see larger fish like tarpon, grouper, barracuda…as well as the occasional shark. Multi-colored sea fans swayed in the gentle current. Colorful reef fish — with their vivid and boldly patterned reds, yellows, greens and blues — were camouflaged amongst the bright coral and sea grasses. Today, turtle populations have diminished, but you may still be able to see green, loggerhead, hawksbill, and leatherback sea turtles. As I walked back to the changing rooms at the dock, the seaplane for my return flight was just landing and I realized my time at Dry Tortugas was coming to an end. If I ever have a chance to get back, I would definitely opt for the full day trip. A week later, after returning home to Colorado and was shoveling snow off of the driveway, a small plane passed overhead and I suddenly thought of my flight to Dry Tortugas : the bright sun, the crystal clear waters, the abundant life — above and below the water's surface — a surreal landscape so captivating, so remote, that even having seen it with my own eyes, I still somehow could barely imagine it. About the Author Rob Decker is a photographer and graphic artist who is currently on a quest to photograph and create iconic WPA-style posters for all 61 National Parks. Rob visited his first national park at age five and began photographing them at age seven on a 10,000 cross-country trip with his family. He would spend the next decade working on his own, building a wet darkroom with his grandfather in the garage and serving as head photographer for the high school yearbook. But Rob's professional training really started at age 19, when he had the rare opportunity to study under Ansel Adams in Yosemite National Park during the summer of 1979, less than five years before Mr. Adams passed away. Since then, he has visited and photographed 50 of the national parks in the US, including those in Alaska, Hawaii, and the Virgin Islands. Click here to see the current collection of posters. https://national-park-posters.com/blogs/national-park-posters/visiting-dry-tortugas-national-park?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=Sendible&utm_campaign=RSS

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prettywordsyouleft · 6 years ago

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The Right Choice - Part 2

Summary: You had hoped going to Korea to look after your estranged grandmother would allow you to connect in some way to your mother’s culture. However, being half-Korean and a single mother meant you would face the stigma of a narrow-minded society instead. Had you really made the right choice to come here?

Pairing: Mark Tuan x reader

Genre: single mother au / strangers to lovers au / self-growth / angst / romance

Warnings: open prejudice and stigma over solo parenting

A/N; Although the warnings seem rather negative, this story is one I hope a lot of you will enjoy! I’ve wanted to write this for over eight months now, and I’m glad I finally sat down to do so. It isn’t as dark as it sounds, and nor is it intentionally a dig at Korean culture as a whole.

The Right Choice will be posted daily at 10am NZST.

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8

You hadn’t slept a wink overnight.

As soon as you had stepped inside the gate, your grandmother had started listing off the reasons why she had requested your help. You could see from the fragile gait she maintained that her legs had worsened since your mother had last visited her, and her breathing was a bit haggard too. All the same, the older woman had an air about her that didn’t want you to pity or fuss over her.

You were simply here to assist her daily needs, that was very clear.

“Can you cook?”

“Yes.”

“Korean meals?”

“My mother taught me as much as she knew.”

“That doesn’t leave me with much hope. Are you a good learner?”

“Yes, Grandmother I am.”

She turned then, eyes small and dark. “You look like him.”

“Uh, I do?” you replied awkwardly, smiling lightly. “A lot of people say I look a lot more like my mother. Just with different eyes.”

“I hated his eyes.”

“Oh.”

She spun around then, ambling into the homestead again. You could tell she was house proud. The place was clean and everything had its place. You made a mental note to spend more time the following day looking at all the memories around the house but for now, you travelled behind her, rocking Emerson whenever she stopped to catch her breath. Eventually, your grandmother showed you into the room for your stay.

“I don’t have anything for the baby set up. I didn’t know you were married.”

“I’m not.” The judgement was instant and you avoided eye contact. “It’s just Emerson and I.”

“I suppose the way of life over there allows for such sin then.”

You refrained from telling her that Emerson was created with a purpose and not from a natural conception either.

“Well, I’ll let you settle in. Tomorrow I have an appointment at two-fifteen. Can you remember that?”

“Two-fifteen, of course.”

Another grunt left her and when she shut the door behind her departure, you slumped down onto the bed, your tears slipping down your cheeks silently.

And then your phone went off. Recomposing yourself, you connected to the call. “Hey, Dad!”

“That bad, huh?”

“She’s a little rough around the edges,” you admitted, rubbing Emerson’s back slowly as you sniffled back the remnants of your emotions. “I’m sure she’s just used to being on her own and doesn’t like that she’s had to reach out for my help.”

“If you begin to feel too uncomfortable, we’ll make other arrangements.”

“We can’t just do that, it’s not our place to, Dad. I’m sure with some time, it’ll be fine.”

He sighed into the receiver. “You just hold on to that hope kiddo. She will try to squash it.”

Emerson had started to fuss when you had pulled out the travel bed you had packed for her, and you had heard the clearing of a throat from outside of the door loudly soon after. You were frazzled enough about being here, and that only made you feel rushed to silence your child. As you rocked her back and forth gently, you tried your best to hold it together. Chanting over and over to yourself that things would be okay.

You were up searching for the kitchen as soon as the morning shone through the windows, a bottle in one hand. With the stress of travelling, feeding Emerson naturally wasn’t working nearly as well as you hoped it would overnight. So you aimed to ensure she had enough in her system for breakfast, smiling to yourself when you finally found the right room.

You set about heating the milk for Emerson quietly when your grandmother walked in. “You’re an early riser.”

“Most mornings, yes.”

“Because of the child?”

You smiled forcibly. “Yes, because of Emerson.”

“What does that mean?”

“What does what mean?” you questioned and the elder shot you a look.

“The name.”

“Uh, I think it’s a German name.”

“You’re not German though, why use a foreign name?” she retorted and you attempted to laugh to ease the mood. It wasn’t appreciated by the woman and you ceased the gesture.

“I happened to like the name.”

“Another weird habit of you Americans, huh?”

“All the same, it is her name,” you replied, somewhat defensively. The woman stared back at you, an indescribable look within her eyes. You found your confidence and smiled again. “It is my child’s name and I’d appreciate you respect that.”

“We name our children with dreams and goals we have for them here in Korea. In hopes they live up to their names,” she mentioned before leaving the kitchen with her cup of tea in hand.

You slumped down into the chair in the bakery an hour later, letting out a heavy breath. Not even the smell of freshly baked bread could perk you up, though you did smile when Mark approached you.

“Did you even sleep?”

“I want to say that I got maybe an hour’s worth,” you replied and he sat down across from you, pouting softly. It made your mood improve being in his company. You then glanced around the bustling store. “Is it okay to vent?”

“None of the ladies are here,” he confirmed and you groaned loudly. “Y/N, you’re doing better than most. You lasted the night.”

“Barely.” You then shot him a disgruntled look. “I thought she would be happy to meet me. Especially since you mentioned I had been a topic to discuss.”

“Well, she did seem rather excited about it when she was talking with her friends. It’s rare to see Mrs Kim smile, but she did.”

“I guess I didn’t live up to her expectations.”

He reached out for your hand gently. “It’s only been a day, give it some time.”

“Speaking of time, I don’t think I have too much time for myself this morning, so I should make my purchase.”

“No way, it’s on me today, remember?”

You grinned at him and after being told to wait there, you glanced down at Emerson sleeping against your chest and sighed. At least after all that fussing, she was finally catching up on her rest. You hoped you would be able to get an early night’s rest tonight.

Mark then returned with a tray brimming of baked goods. You glanced up at him in surprise. “All of this?”

“You haven’t been to Korea, that’s what I was told. So I’m guessing you’ve never tried Korean bread before either.”

“Not authentically,” you agreed with a smile and picked up one, taking a bite of the sweet bun. You melted into your chair. “Oh my god, this is so good! Did you make this?”

“Ha-ha, no. I just work here to discount my rent. You can find me here every morning from seven to midday.”

“And then do you disappear?”

Mark chuckled. “Into the world of study, sure.”

“You’re a student?” you questioned, your cheeks growing pink. “Oh, I didn’t expect you to be so young.”

“I’m a teacher’s assistant at the local university,” he answered, smirking lightly. “I teach math.”

“The one subject that I’m weak with.”

He grinned again. “Maybe you’ll need some lessons.”

“I’m a bit old for school, I graduated many years ago.”

“You don’t look too old to me, Y/N.”

“I’m older than you think.”

“Does age matter?”

You sighed softly. “In this country, it seems a lot of things matter.”

You didn’t mean to unload your frustrations onto Mark, yet he was an easy listener. You told him how much you had doubted who you were in the past twelve hours more than you had in your entire life. You forgot he was a stranger you had only met last night, though you didn’t spill everything about your life either.

When you were done and pulling apart another pastry with your frustrations, Mark finally responded. “You’re not a bad person for being a single mother, Y/N. You’re right; there is a lot of stigma around children and parenting in this country. It’s a narrow-minded viewpoint. But she should be grateful you’re here. You could have said no because you’re a mother to such a young child. You didn’t though.”

“I guess I didn’t want to let her down.”

“She’s not exactly offering you something positive in exchange though.”

“My Mum married my Dad, who is obviously not Korean,” you announced, pointing to your eyes to prove it. “I think she is still bitter over it, and since I look like both of them, maybe I’m a sore spot for her to look at.”

“You’re still her granddaughter, and I remain convinced that she was boastful about your achievements here the other day. Old people tend to be more traditional. Give her some time to open up.”

You nodded, smiling at him lightly. And then it dawned on you just how much time you had spent here, and further, how much you had said. Before you could say anything, Mark raised his hand to dismiss your thoughts. “I told you where to find me for a reason, Y/N. You’re more than welcome to come and seek me out. I’ll listen. It’s the least I can do.”

“You’re a good person.”

“Not as good as you are. But you’re right; she’s probably convinced you’re using this trip as a vacation and off sightseeing by now.”

“I should go!”

“We’ll do the sightseeing later in the week then,” he commented with a grin and you mirrored it, nodding before dashing out the door.

At least you had someone rooting for your success here.

_________________

Part 3

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