#jarson st. phillips

[jarsonstphillips]

Tender Tuesday Shelter by Hedley Jess (Future!Jarson) “You know, when we have our first kid-“ Carson turned on his side to face Jesse, eyebrow arched. “I’m sorry; did you just say ‘when we have our first kid’? Or am I experiencing an auditory hallucination?” Jesse lifted their folded hands, thumb moving in circles. “I mean, after I’ve established myself on Broadway and you’ve taken off in the newspaper business or whatever, I figured would be a good time for-“ “Jesse, please tell me you understand how babies are made. Please. Because we’ve had sex. You know what my anatomy is. And you’re certainly familiar with your own.” “Of course I do,” Jesse rolled his eyes. “But in this day and age there are other ways babe!” Carson stared at him for a long moment before sighing. “Okay, what were you saying?” “I think he should be named after one of us.” “He? We’re having a son now?” Carson deadpanned, and Jesse smirked. “Of course.” “Jesse, did you grow a vagina while I wasn’t looking or…?” “Come on, Carson,” Jesse groaned, leaning forward to touch their foreheads. Carson’s eyes closed with the intimacy for a moment then slowly opened again to meet Jesse’s. “You’re so beyond the realm of insane.” “We can name him Carson junior,” Jesse breathed, eyes alight, and Carson’s nose wrinkled, lips pursing with distaste. “Jesse, come on. Be real here.” Jesse smiled a little, shaking his head against Carson’s. “Cameron? It’s close. And gender neutral.” Carson sighed again. “Where is this even coming from?” “Can you imagine a Jesse junior?” “No, Jess” Carson moaned. “And the thought alone is terrifying. I have one of you already, and that’s more than enough.” Jesse licked his lips and swallowed. “Jess.” “What?” “My nickname.” Carson stared at him for a long moment, only barely breathing, then rolled his eyes and leaned the rest of the way in, lips coming to touch Jesse’s, resting there without movement, like they were his home. His hand flexed in Jesse’s. His eyes continued to stare into Jesse’s, gaze slowly melting. “Jess…isn’t the worst name…” Tune in tomorrow to find out more about Jess. ;)

[actualwizardbillykaplan]

Finally writing my own Jarson St. Phillips

Any one who is not interested in the pairing of Jesse St. James and Carson Hummel(Phillips), you are not required to read :-D

It's 3 am and Jesse's phone is ringing.

He grumbles a few obscenities but reaches for it anyway; it could be an emergency on stage, a role he might have to take over for the night. Or, maybe, a friend spotted yet another celebrity in the Big Apple that could get Jesse places.

"Hello?"

"Jesse? Jesse! Can-can you hear me? It's loooooud."

Jesse blinks. "Carson?"

"Yeah! It's Carson. It's loud here, Jesse. Can you hear me? I can talk louder."

"You're shouting into the phone, Carson," Jesse sits up and flicks the lamp on, a hand carding through his unruly hair, "Are you drunk?"

"Nooooooooooooo. You're drunk."

Jesse stands, looking for his shoes and keys and whatever items he'll need because he knows he'll be leaving soon. 

"Where are you?"

"I'm at the bar. Duh."

"What bar, Carson?"

Carson rattles off a title and a street and then Jesse hears him ask the bartender for another shot.

"Carson!" he shouts into the phone. "No, no more alcohol for you. You are not allowed to drink until I get there."

Carson pouts over the line and Jesse tells him he'll be there in a few.

Then he hangs up and all but bolts out the door.

XxX

He recognizes some of Carson's classmates when he gets to the bar; they're all crowded around him as he downs another shot. Jesse sighs. This is going to be fun.

"Alright, Carson," Jesse walks over, talking loudly and glaring at anyone who looks at him. He reaches Carson and tugs on his arm, "Let's go."

Carson wrenches his arm away. "No. Havin' fun."

"Yeah," some girl smarts at him. "He's having fun."

Jesse blinks. "He's also 18 and shouldn't be this smashed."

Two guys exchange worried looks, like there's actually something Jesse can do. It's not like Carson didn't know what he was getting into but Jesse likes making people feel like idiots. Especially when they don't seem to care how trashed his boyfriend-

Ex, he reminds himself. Ex-boyfriend.

He tries again. "Let's go, Carson. You're going to have a hell of a hangover and there's no way you're gonna let yourself skip class."

Carson finally stumbles to his feet, almost crashing into Jesse, who holds him for just a moment, before winding an arm around his shoulders and guiding him out the door. He hears the classmates grumble something a tab behind him but fuck them. They can pay their own.

The next part is fun. Thankfully, Carson's apartment isn't too far from the bar and, while Jesse doesn't have a key, he isn't opposed to either trying to find Carson's or waking Kurt up because there's no way the more straight-laced Hummel isn't fast asleep right now. Probably with the boyfriend.

They get to the building and into the elevator; Carson hits all the buttons and laughs before slumping against Jesse again. He tries not to let himself enjoy this, Carson's body so close to his after so long.

Because he's Jesse St. James. His two greatest loves are himself and the stage. There's no way a snippy teenager from Lima, Ohio who likes to blackmail and work himself to death somehow weaseled his way in.

(A snippy teenager with gorgeous eyes, an adorable laugh (when he lets loose) and an extremely talented tongue.)

Finally, the elevator lets them off (seventh floor) and they stumble down the hallway to the last room on the left. 

"Give me your keys, Carson."

"Don't.....key...."

"Fuck," Jesse mumbles. Then he bangs on the door. A light flood through the crack at the bottom and he can hear Kurt clearly before the door flies open and he's treated, once again, to a standard Hummel glare.

Kurt's eyebrows rise in confusion. "St. James?"

"I have a delivery," Jesse says, and he motions to Carson, who is almost completely passed out against the door.

Kurt sighs and grabs for his twin but before he can get any leeway, Carson tears away and stumbles into Jesse, wrapping an arm around his waist and snuggling close. Kurt blinks.

"Well. You can bring him in."

He opens the door wider and Jesse curses everything before sheparding Carson into the apartment and, once again, down a hallway. He drops Carson (gently) on the bed and sighs, wiping at his forehead and turning around. But Carson grabs his arm and tugs and then Jesse is looking down at him and Carson is rising up and...

And then they're kissing. Again. For the first time since Jesse left last summer. He doesn't want to kiss back, not while he's drunk, but it's Carson and fuck it's always been Carson. 

When they pull back, Carson is smiling. Like, actually legit smiling. Not that cocky smirk or that fake smile he uses around everyone else. It's his real, true, happy smile.

Then he falls back onto the bed, snoring loud into the pillow. Jesse watches him for a moment before he stalks out, closing the door quietly behind him. Kurt is waiting by the front door and he gives Jesse a tight smile.

"Thank you. He's...he needs new friends, I'll say that."

"Agreed," Jesse says dryly. "Er, goodnight."

Kurt nods. It's not until Jesse is halfway out the door that Kurt speaks up again.

"Really, though," his voice is a lot warmer, "Thank you, Jesse. I'm glad he called you."

Jesse glances back; Kurt and Carson have the same eye color but not the same eyes; he should know, all the time he's spent looking into them, thinking about them, missing them.

"Yeah. Me too."

He honestly means it.

[ash-overthinking]

IN AN INSTANT- A Jarson St. Hummel story. Characterization spoilers for Struck By Lightning! Crossover. Pairing= Jarson St. Phillips/ Jesse St. James + Carson Phillips.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7299973/1/In_An_Instant

Every time this is read and/or reviewed Carson fondles Jesse for his recorder. Of course Jesse keeps stealing it...these boys...

[nichorello]

For some reason I really want to RP St. Phillips? I keep seeing stuff about them and now I'm kind of digging the idea of it. Sooo, if anybody wants a Jesse for a St. Phillips 1x1, or even perhaps a 2x2, etc. with more characters from Glee/Struck By Lightning, hit up my ask!

[jarsonstphillips]

Thought Out Thursday High School Never Ends by Bowling For Soup Carson's Schedule

1st Period - AP US History 2nd Period - Algebra 2 AP 3rd Period - Journalism 4th Period - Lunch 5th Period - Physical Education 6th Period - Advanced Physics 7th Period - English 3 AP 8th Period - Latin I

[jarsonstphillips]

Morose Monday Good To You by Marianas Trench Lines “Valentine’s Day is magical,” Claire informed Carson, who didn’t bother to suppress his returning snicker. “Please tell me you’re not serious.” She rolled her eyes and darted a glance at the couple of students milling about them. “It’s a day guys are all more likely to get laid, so you should be sucking up to me, asshole. Or do you really not want to get any on our date tonight?” Carson arched his brow at her, but grabbed her hand anyway, pulling her to him. “Come on. Do you really need a day dedicated to love?” “Yes,” she muttered. “Besides, it has historical significance…” “Ah, okay,” he said nonchalantly, then, with a little more significance: “So is this you being interested in the holiday because it’s everywhere and it’s culturally pounded into us that-“ “Carson,” Claire whined, pressing herself to his chest. He simply smirked and kept going, even as his head jutted out over hers, his adams apple moving warmly against her forehead. “Or is it you being a nerd?” “Does it matter?” she asked after a moment, her voice muffled against his shirt. He snorted. “Yes.” Claire sighed. “Why does being your girlfriend have to be so complicated?” “You’re the one who kissed me first. You got yourself into it. Must have been for a reason.” “It’s because I love you,” she declared angrily even as she pressed in a little closer to his heartbeat. Carson gave another snort, unimpressed with the indignant announcement. “We’re not even eighteen Claire… And you’re still subtly checking every few minutes to see if anyone’s watching.” “No’m not,” she scowled into his shirt. “Carson, come on.” “What exactly do you want Claire?” he asked quietly after a moment, head turning to rest on hers, eyes closing with the intimacy despite himself. “I want to wake up,” she whispered finally, honestly. “Because none of this is real.” “What?” Claire pulled away from him finally, and tears were dripping quietly from her eyes. “You’re not mine. You could have been but you’re not. And this can never happen now, because I ruined it.” Carson took a deep breath, head shaking, eyes closed. “No.” They stood silently together a moment as devastation sank over, and then quietly still they faded from existence. Claire woke slowly, eyes and cheeks wet with the soft, insistent drip of her tears. She’d missed out.

[jarsonstphillips]

Jesse's Sexy Time Playlist Track of the Day: Black & Gold by Sam Sparro

[jarsonstphillips]

Tender Tuesday (Making up) Truly, Madly, Deeply by Savage Garden Disney (Part III) “Once upon a time, in a faraway land, a young prince lived in a shining castle. Although he had everything his heart desired, the prince was spoiled, selfish, and unkind. But then, one winter's night, an old beggar woman came to the castle and offered him a single rose in return for shelter from the bitter cold. Repulsed by her haggard appearance, the prince sneered at the gift and turned the old woman away, but she warned him not to be deceived by appearances, for beauty is found within. And when he dismissed her again, the old woman's ugliness melted away to reveal a beautiful enchantress. The prince tried to apologize, but it was too late, for she had seen that there was no love in his heart, and as punishment, she transformed him into a hideous beast, and placed a powerful spell on the castle, and all who lived there. Ashamed of his monstrous form, the beast concealed himself inside his castle, with a magic mirror as his only window to the outside world. The rose she had offered was truly an enchanted rose, which would bloom until his twenty-first year. If he could learn to love another, and earn her love in return by the time the last petal fell, then the spell would be broken. If not, he would be doomed to remain a beast for all time. As the years passed, he fell into despair, and lost all hope, for who could ever learn to love a beast?” The screen froze then, just as the town began coming into focus, and Jesse frowned, rubbing a thumb over the top of Carson’s hand in a slow circle. “This better be an emergency.” “It’s just pause, Jess,” Carson dismissed the complaint promptly, leaning back to place a kiss at the juncture of Jesse’s neck and jaw. “But is this how tripe I can expect the entire thing to be? Please say no.” “Tripe?” Jesse repeated, shaking his head. “Oh no. Romantic.” “Same thing, apparently,” Carson snorted, then sighed. “It’s so formulaic.” “That’s because Disney invented that formula,” Jesse sniffed indignantly, untangling their bodies a bit so their eyes could meet with greater ease. “They’re practically the founders. I’m rewinding!” “Why?” Carson asked, casting his boyfriend a look of disbelief. “Because you interrupted the story!” “You were mouthing every word with it,” Carson retorted, eyes narrowed. “How many times have you even seen this?” “That’s like asking how many times I’ve had sex or how many people’s minds my talent has blown.” “Right… Just hit play, Narcissus.” “Whatever you say, Casper.” Jesse hummed a little, leaning against him again and re-twining their hands, arms, and legs, kissing Carson hard a moment on the lips, then down over his tilted neck before he hit play. Carson just sighed, half with contentment, half with exasperation, and leaned into his boyfriend, attempting to watch the movie as best he could since it was apparently so freaking important. “Belle was my first crush,” Jesse murmured into his ear. “and then it was the beast. I always thought we’d all be a great couple. This movie was also my first introduction to the idea that smart is sexy. And threesomes.” Carson closed his eyes a moment. “Jesse, I really don’t know how to respond to that.” “You’re Belle.” “And you better be drunk if you’re making that comparison, Jess. Didn’t you want to watch this?” “We can always re-watch it like Mulan.” “Hell no.” Jesse just smirked and kissed him and leaned them together a little more firmly, his gaze tracking between Carson’s face and the movie, seeing straight through Carson’s poker face and ignoring of him. Slowly but surely, of course, much to Jesse’s satisfaction, Carson’s complaints gained distance and he began to watch with increasing focus, his expression the same one of study he had when he was absorbed in picking apart an article or meticulously picking his way over Jesse’s body, delving into various nooks and crannys, hitting every sweet spot as he steadily journeyed over his boyfriend’s body, concentrating explicitly on Jesse and the shockwaves of pleasure he could make spike in his bloodstream. He’d known Carson would like this one. “You’re such a Belle,” he accidentally mumbled aloud, and Carson’s eyes rolled instantly. “You’re the living embodiment of Gaston, so you’re not really one to talk, Jesse.” Jesse gaped at him. “Blasphemy.” “Vocabulary.” Carson quickly pressed him with a kiss, letting their tongues linger and rub together a moment before pulling back and returning his eyes to the screen. “Also, truth and you know it.” “I’m the Beast,” Jesse retorted after a beat, tone sullen. “You’re Belle and I’m the Beast.” “I am very much not Belle,” Carson dismissed the claim disdainfully. “And you are most definitely Gaston. Now, shut up so we can actually watch this please.” “Say it like you mean it,” Jesse mewled, giving Carson a grin and batting his eyes, flexing subtly. Carson snorted, not looking away from the movie. “You are so Gaston, Jess. Now shut your mouth.” “Make me.” When Carson didn’t bother to reply, Jesse sighed and leaned his head onto his shoulder. “You know you like my mouth better when it’s open, anyway.” “Keep your delusions,” Carson murmured, smiling a bit to offset the words. “I know how you need them.” “A hole just waiting to be filled,” Jesse sang and Carson groaned. “With duct tape maybe.” “Kinky.” “We both know you like it rough.” There were both silent a moment, watching the movie and watching each other in equal measure, shoulders nudging companionably, comfortable in the quiet as they were in the non. “The ending was lame.” “Carson,” Jesse yawned, “you’re lame. Happy endings are amazing.” “It made the entire theme seem pointless,” Carson retorted. “It was a cop-out.” “It was Disney, darling.” “Clearly,” Carson scoffed. “And crap.” “No,” Jesse crooned in his ear. “You liked it and you know it.” “Overwrought and sloppy and contrived and weak,” Carson argued back. “They completely undermined the validity of their premise!” “You liked it,” Jesse rebuked him, placing a smug kiss on his jawline. Carson glared at him, though it lacked real anger. “It’s no wonder our generations are as ridiculous as they are with the messages of this sort being pumped into their minds constantly from infancy.” “Don’t be bitter because you didn’t get to see these when you were a little Carson.” “I’m grateful,” Carson informed him pointedly. “Mary Poppins never gave you a spoonful of sugar to help the medicine go down, did she?” Jesse sighed and Carson stopped short, brow furrowing. “Mary Poppins is a classic of children’s films and Disney musicals,” he recited, fingers wiggling in Jesse’s as his mind searched. “But I haven’t seen it. So, I don’t really know if that’s a reference or not…Although I take it given your context-” Jesse’s look of horror made him interrupt himself with a sigh. “I need to stop telling you what I haven’t seen, don’t I?” “Adding it to the list,” Jesse exclaimed simultaneously, and Carson shook his head, hiding a smile. “As long as you��re ready to watch another documentary on the making of paper.” Jesse frowned. “That’s not fair.” “It completely is.” “I take it back; you’re not Belle. Belle was nice to the Beast.” Carson simply smiled openly in return and pulled him in for another kiss that quickly slid into more. One more Disney movie down. And, really, thinking on it, Carson was glad Jesse admitted he wasn’t Belle. Not because it was stupid and untrue, both of which it was, but because they didn’t need that. They didn’t need comparing to any of these trademark couples and true loves and all that crap. They weren’t a Disney romance. They were just them, and, frankly, Carson thought that was more than enough, and definitely better than being a Belle and the Beast or Mulan and what’s-his-face or what any other Disney couple could have a prayer of being. They were a trademark all their own: Jesse and Carson. Unintentionally, Jesse echoed this exactly two weeks later, if in his own way, while they watched Aladdin and Jasmine finally kiss (after far too much contrived and aggravated delaying that really hadn’t needed to go on as long as it had, according to Carson, who was pretty sure that it would have been better if they’d narrowed it down to content that was actually semi-decent and just made it a fifteen minute short film on class differences), saying with a smug look toward his boyfriend: “They’re all so perfect for each other… But of course they’d be dead jealous of us, you know.” Carson just smirked and snorted knowingly and pulled him in for another make-out session.

[jarsonstphillips]

Create your own Jarson AU! Long distance Jarson inspired by this. (I apologize I couldn't make the Jon gifs I really wanted to use work, so this is only eh.)

[jarsonstphillips]

Morose Monday Mr. Brightside by The Killers Mr. Brightside (Angst warning! Also slight spoilers.) Screw him. Screw him. Screw him. He was the one who’d gotten Carson into this all in the first place, and who was he to fucking leave, after everything? And who the hell was this Rachel Berry girl anyway? Probably a prissy little princess, just like Jesse. She certainly seemed that way. And wasn’t it just like him, too, finding someone to be with who was just like him. Jesse had always been Narcissus personified, hadn’t he? A Greek legend come to life. Well, Carson had seen it, hadn’t he? All along he had, but he’d been stupid- stupid and pathetic and weak to let himself get distracted and fall in love like a moron, like he was every other idiot teenager at his school- and now that stupidity, because that’s what it was, what it had to be, sheer fucking stupidity, had come back to bite him in the ass. He was getting exactly what he deserved for that. Maybe. He still wasn’t sure. But- Who cared that this didn’t feel even remotely fair, either way? Certainly not Jesse, who had so cavalierly walked away when Carson’s uses ran all dry, and gone right back to his precious Lima, and Rachel, who, he announced (on facebook, through song, because he was Jesse, and that was the way he did things), he’d loved unceasingly since their first meeting. That there’d never been anyone else. As if Carson had never existed. He might as well have not. Prince was crap, too. Especially that song. It was ridiculous. Predictable and cheesy, with too much sentiment and too little depth. An easy song, for an easy, superficial type of love. Carson nodded firmly, typing furiously. At least he was getting plenty of articles out of all this… He just needed to get this right, though. And get Jesse and the spoiled dwarf out of his head. He’d simply have to work harder, wouldn’t he? His phone, broken under his bed, gained another three voicemails, and Carson spent his third night in a row without sleep on an editorial that would be defaced and ruined for him before noon the next day. In Lima, Ohio, Jesse St. James gave Rachel Berry his biggest show smile, and tried to remember all the reasons he had to love her. Usually, it was enough to think of how brilliant he was, and how much alike they were. A true power couple, both destined for fame. The problem was that that only worked when you liked yourself completely, and, for the first time, Jesse was beginning not to. He excused himself to the bathroom before they headed off to Prom, and locked himself in a stall, his fingers dialing the number as they always did. And, as always, no-one picked up. Jesse unlocked the door, went to the mirror, and stared as hard as he could until he was able to create a big enough smile. His face reflecting back at him looked ludicrously old, and, one more time before he had to return to his sorta-girlfriend (fuck that was a weird thought after almost a year of his…), he dialed the number.

[jarsonstphillips]

Thought-Out Thursday Let's Talk About Sex by SaltN'Peppa    

Sexuality-Special Pt. 1

This is the first of our Thought-out Thursday Sexuality Special, which should run for four posts including this one. In this first, we hope to just give readers a vague sexual-inclination to attribute to each character; in those that follow, however, we will be getting more in depth with our information. Jesse and Carson will be explained in the final of this "special", as theirs are the most involved and crucial. Not to mention that they're our main characters. Here's hoping this helps you guys! It certainly helped us when we first started out...

Character Sexual Labels

 Carson : Pansexual

 Jesse : Bisexual

 Lucas : Heterosexual

 Clare : Heterosexual

 Naomi : Bisexual

 Tiffany : Homosexual

 Seth : Newly Closeted Heterosexual (in denial)

 Amy (will be appearing shortly) :  Heterosexual

 Andrew : Heterosexual

 Sarah : Heterosexual

 Chad (will be appearing shortly) : Homosexual

Hopefully this will help some of you in understanding where our characters are at in terms of sexual identity, since we'd seen a bit of confusion in a few, and that this works to tide everyone over until the next installment!

See you tomorrow with Fun Friday! It should be a blast! ;)

P.S. ...Is it just me, or can you just totally hear Jesse singing this in some cheesy karaoke bar???? :D

[jarsonstphillips]

Create your own Jarson AU! Here's some teacher!Jarson for you. :) Wanna take a guess at what Jesse's favorite class is? ;)

[jarsonstphillips]

Morose Monday The Mess I Made by Parachute Theory of Displacement (Slight crossover & future spoilers!) “Alright guys! With all the in-house fighting we’ve been having, Ms. Pilsbury and I had a talk about the ability to apologize and how much trouble you all seem to have with it. Jesse! You’re here to help me out, and we all know there’s been some trouble between you and New Directions in the past. You up for it?” Jesse smirked. “Of course.” His smirk faded slightly, but was swiftly replaced with a show-smile before it became too obvious. “I have the perfect song, actually.” Rachel straightened in her chair and Finn scowled at him. Jesse’s smile brightened, and he took to center stage. “This song is called The Mess I Made and it’s by a band called Parachute. It’s dedicated to Rachel.” There was a mass groan and some Spanish cursing he easily ignored, sliding into the star-zone as he began to sing. “Should've kissed you there; I should've held your face; I should've watched those eyes; Instead of run in place; I should've called you out; I should've said your name; I should've turned around; I should've looked again.” “Please tell me this is one of your stupid fucking inappropriate jokes,” Carson snapped, slamming himself into his desk chair and staring at Jesse, his arms sliding to cross tightly over his chest, head slightly bowing. Jesse closed the door behind himself and took a few more steps toward Carson, before turning away from him and fluidly falling back against the wall, crossing his ankles and fixing his gaze on Carson’s headboard. “Don’t make a scene,” he offered blandly, though it didn’t sound as if he cared much one way or another. Jesse allowed the emotions of the past month to surface and surge, allowing himself to uncage his feelings for the first time since he’d sat in the dean’s office with his parents on the other line, feeling his world, so high for so long, falling at the speed and ease with which the word “Fail” passed wholly through indifferent lips. “But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made; I'm staring at the mess I made; I'm staring at the mess I made; As you turn, you take your heart and walk away… Should've held my ground; I could've been redeemed,” his voice broke a little and Rachel’s eyes watered as he moved his gaze to her, no longer sure how much of this was acting, how much was him simply milking the audience and performance for all it was worth, and how much… “For every second chance; that changed its mind on me; I should've spoken up; I should've proudly claimed; That oh my head's to blame; For all my heart's mistakes.” Carson gave a derisive snort, straightening a little. “Fuck you, St. James. Since when am I the drama queen between the two of us, huh? And what the hell should I even do? You’re the one who came to your boyfriend and said that you had failed school and were moving back to Lima and by the way dumping me like it was the goddamn weather. I’ll give it to you though that you’re clearly a fucking good actor, and the biggest dick I’ve ever known, which is really something. I’ll be sure to send you a trophy.” “Just as long as it’s gold,” Jesse retorted indifferently. “I haven’t accepted a trophy that wasn’t gold since I was one month old. You should see my trophy room.” “Where do you get off,” Carson asked quietly, after a long beat, “doing this? I hate you so much right now. You’re just this complete fucking dick, Jesse, you know that? And you know what, I hate myself even more, because I knew it, but I was a stupid fucking idiot and fell for you anyway. You had no right.” He’d tasted failure and found he couldn’t handle it. He wasn’t made for that. He was made to succeed. So, that meant going where he knew for absolute sure that he could succeed. Lima. Jesse hadn’t wanted to go back. He hadn’t wanted to leave Naomi and even Lucas and Seth and… He licked his lips and threw himself into singing and into watching the reactions he was getting. Here he was beyond successful. He was even beyond just a star. “But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made; I'm staring at the mess I made; I'm staring at the mess I made; As you turn, you take your heart and walk away…” Honesty cut into his voice just a little more than he preferred, but he kept going. “And it's you, and it's you; And it's you, and it's you; And it's falling down, as you walk away; And it's on me now, as you go…” Jesse rolled his shoulder into an empty one-armed shrug against the wall. “You’re right. It was stupid. What was dumber was me letting you out of the deal. If you’d just kept helping me, like a good boyfriend-“ “Are you fucking shitting me?” Carson snarled. “You told me I could stop because you knew I was killing myself trying to help you. A good boyfriend would have done it far earlier. If it weren’t for me you’d have probably been kicked out sooner.” “And if it weren’t for you stopping, I wouldn’t have been kicked out at all.” “That was your choice,” Carson retorted, his eyes turning to ice even as he hugged himself tighter and they started to burn. “Whatever,” Jesse said throwing Carson his brightest smile. “Either way, while this is fun and all, and perfect fodder for my future biography, as well as my reality show ‘Jesse St. Starborn’, I really don’t have time to waste arguing with you anymore, Casper. And shouldn’t I get a vocabulary bonus for that? Kiss me goodbye?” Carson blinked and drew in a quick breath through his nose, nostrils flaring and throat tightening. Jesse licked his lips, letting his eyes flit back to Carson, and glance briefly at the ice, then back to the headboard. “But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made; I'm staring at the mess I made; I'm staring at the mess I made; As you turn, you take your heart and walk away; And it's falling down, as you walk away; And it's on me now, as you go.” “Are you actually going to cry? Because, Carson, really, this isn’t…” “Fuck off,” Carson interrupted sharply, his tone promising death, or worse: castration. “Get out of my house and fuck off. I hate you, St. James, and don’t for a second think that I would cry over you. You’re not worth it.” Jesse stared at him. “So. I’ll call you when I get to Lima, then.” “I said,” Carson’s voice was cold and certain, each note clearly punctuated. “Get out of my house. Leave, St. James. Now.” “We’re totally on the verge of hate-sex territory though,” Jesse smirked, waggling his brows, but Carson simply gave him a look of stone and turned away, pressing the button to start his computer, grabbing a book, a journal, and his cup of pens and highlighters. “But oh, I'm staring at the mess I made; I'm staring at the mess I made; I'm staring at the mess I made; As you turn, you take your heart and walk away.” Jesse waited for a moment, then turned and left, the door’s slam behind him reverberating through the room. Carson didn’t cry. Instead, he worked. Clapping brought Jesse back and he pretended it didn’t leave a bitter taste on his tongue. He’d always been really good at pretend.

[jarsonstphillips]

Tender Tuesday Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol Disney (Part II) “Are you ready?” Jesse’s voice was husky, his breath hot on Carson’s ear. Carson sighed, licking his lips, closing his eyes. “I’m really not sure about this…” “Babe, it’s a bit late to back out. I mean, if you really want to, I’m sure there are other things we can do, but...” Carson gave him a look of annoyance. “You’re obsessed, Jesse. Whatever. Just…put it in.” Jesse grinned and gave his earlobe a tantalizing lick, then kissed over his cheek, pulling him into a deep kiss from behind. “This will be amazing, Carson, believe me.” “Yeah, yeah,” Carson murmured, a bit breathless. “What are you waiting for, St. James?” “…You’re on the remote.” Carson rolled his eyes but rolled to the side and Jesse gave him another kiss, this one quick as he grabbed the remote. “Don’t you have to put it in?” Carson grumbled, settling back against Jesse’s pillows and Jesse smirked, waggling his eyebrows. “Already did.” He hit play and the menu popped up, then again and the Disney logo shone across the screen. Carson grimaced. “Lights are going off,” Jesse informed him, promptly hitting the lightswitch before Carson could get a chance to reply, and bounding back to his bed. “No messing around,” Carson sighed after a moment, even as he settled close to Jesse and twined their fingers between them; Jesse smirked softly. “Well, you know, it’s our seventh date. There are some expectations, Casper…” “Shut up,” Carson mumbled, but leaned over to kiss him anyway a moment later. He managed to get them wrapped into a makeout session pretty quickly, and was slowly gaining a smug sense of triumph in his successful evasion of the movie, when: “It’s starting!” Carson pulled back, brow furrowed, tongue tracing vaguely over his already slightly swollen lips. “It hadn’t already?” “No,” Jesse said, looking smug himself. “It is now, though, so no more.” Carson scowled a little, looking oddly truculent, essentially pouting at the dismissal, though he’d rip Jesse a new one if he heard as much. Not that that had ever stopped Jesse, who smirked and kissed his cheek again, then collar, chin, nose, forehead, and finally stopped to rest his cheek against Carson’s hair. Carson just snorted, the blue of his irises gleaming with his bemusement. “I thought you wanted to watch this, Jess.” “Stop pouting first. It’s cute, but it doesn’t become you.” Carson pulled away, eyebrows up. “I’m not sure if I should leave because you just referred to me as pouting and cute, as if I were some toddler that didn’t get their way…Or give you a vocabulary…” Jesse laughed, kissed him, and grinned, stretching to reach the remote. “And see now I have to rewind! That’s what you get for pouting.” Carson snorted again and shook his head, muttering something about “ridiculous”, but reached to twine their hands again anyway, adjusting himself slightly and inhaling deeply. “What’s the name of this again then?” “Mulan,” Jesse retorted distractedly. “You ready?” “Yeah, yeah, Jesse. Would you stop taking away your hand for fuck’s sake?” Jesse looked at him a moment then smiled, eyes crinkling pleasantly. “As you wish, Buttercup.” Carson gave him a look of disconcertion. “Excuse me? I’ll accept ‘babe’, but ‘buttercup’ is not happening.” Jesse gaped at him. “Princess Bride,” he exclaimed in outrage. “You seriously grew up under a rock, didn’t you?” Carson’s eyes narrowed. “Are you going to get back here and watch this cartoon with me or not?” And Jesse might like to press his luck a lot of the time, but this was both Disney and a chance to lay down with his boyfriend, so he wasn’t risking it. “Fine,” he sighed, hitting play and moving back to Carson, folding their hands together when Carson made no move to. “I’m adding it to the list of movies we have to watch after Disney, though.” “It’ll cost you a documentary on the newspaper making process,” Carson retorted evenly, and Jesse wrinkled his nose. “Fine, deal.” He moved to kiss him gently, then pulled back and grinned. “Now will you watch?” Carson’s response was to pull him closer and sigh against his hair. “If you’d stop interrupting me, yeah.” It didn’t take long for Carson to start railing against perceived historical inaccuracies, severely criticizing the “talking animal” nonsense that had apparently only been used well in a book called Charlotte’s Web, and pointing out inconsistencies of continuity in both the story and animation, Jesse retaliating by singing along loudly and dancing (as best he could seeing as he was still lying down) to every number. Still, they didn’t let go of each other’s hands again for the next eighty eight minutes, and when Jesse noticed that Carson had fallen asleep in the last ten or so minutes, blasphemy though it was, he still did his best to tug the comforter a little more securely around his boyfriend, and fell asleep himself, content that their date had been actually better than he’d expected. Being with Carson in reality always did end up better than anticipated, after all. He almost wondered if he’d ever stop being surprised by this, since Jesse’s fantasies had always been better than reality, even while his reality was unfalteringly awesome, but Carson’s steady breathing lulled him to sleep before he could pursue the thought further. Still, he managed to decide before he was completely gone, they were definitely going to have to watch Mulan again, since Carson hadn’t seen all of it. He wasn’t getting out of this. Which was funny because when they both awoke a few hours later and Jesse told him as much, he didn’t even try, and they ended up just falling asleep again, and yeah, this was definitely happening again. Their hands, as much as was possible, stayed tangled together through it all.