#kempol ♡ 𓈒 𓈒 𓈒

[edensvessel]

by the way, everything is going to be ok

[edensvessel]

Hello! I'm someone that experiences psychosis and actively take medication for it. The specific type of delusions I experience are delusions of grandeur, and the whole "spiritual psychosis" thing really, really grinds my gears.

You can disagree with someone without demonising people like me and adding to the stigma surrounding psychosis. Because of how often that term gets thrown around, people like me are infinitely more afraid of speaking about our experiences because we're so used to questioning every bit of our realities to begin with. I'm lucky enough to have it easier, considering I'm on medication and can access help whenever I need it. Someone else may not be able to.

Learn how to disagree with people without discrediting their mental state and throwing the burden on the shoulders of the mentally ill while you're at it. Polytheist/pagan spaces always preach about being mental health/neurodivergent safe and then turn around and throw around these terms, and I'm so sick of it.

People really heard the term religious psychosis and ran with it. Not everyone who disagrees with you has psychosis. People have different practices and that's perfectly fine also you as a random person on tumblr or tiktok have no right or authority to say that someome else has psychosis. You can certainly recommend seeing a professional but to label someone with a severe mental illness is ridiculous

[edensvessel]

By the way, lessons from the gods aren't always big borderline traumatic lifechanging events that alter your brain chemistry. Sometimes a lesson can be a small bad feeling in your gut after you said something you later realise you don't agree with. Sometimes a lesson can be a small energy surge, enough to get you out of bed for the day. Sometimes a lesson can be a dip in energy, making you unable to do anything but sleep. It's not always something big, and in thinking that, you run the risk of missing some things.

[edensvessel]

low / no empathy polytheists i love you

[edensvessel]

all of this could be solved if people just started clarifying whenever they're speaking about their own UPGs by the way. it is that simple

i feel like a lot of the takes on greek mythology i'm seeing are seriously lacking in contextual awareness?

[edensvessel]

　　﹒　external signs vs internal signs . . .

note: this is all my own upg !!! whether or not you decide to follow this is up to you !!! if it makes your worship easier and makes sense with your beliefs, then by all means, feel free to adopt it.

in my practice, what makes most sense to me is the concept of internal signs and external signs. most deities have their own style of signs, and it usually falls into either of them. sometimes even both.

　౨ৎ　external signs

these are the more difficult ones to discern, for me at least. these are signs exhibited in the external world. for example, seeing a number associated with your deity or seeing your deity's domain more often if it's uncommon, or seeing your deity's associations more often. usually, i find these somewhat unreliable unless they're super obvious, mainly because as humans, we have a tendency for pattern recognition and confirmation bias. for these kinds of signs, it's very important to consider the mundane before the magical. a rule of thumb many like to apply when it comes to external signs is: if it happens three times or more, it's more likely that it's a sign. otherwise, don't bother.

　౨ৎ　internal signs

these are much easier for me to personally discern! these are signs exhibited within yourself. for example, dreams, meditations, information obtained through clairs, channelling, etc. for these kinds of signs, it is CRUCIAL to recognise your own thought patterns beforehand. for example, i tend to think in words. one word after the other. when i get an internal message from a deity, depending on the deity, it's either a full message that i have to translate to words or a full message in words that's not a consistent stream of words rather like a whole paragraph dropped in my brain. i also observe the speech patterns and vocabulary used, both my own and any potential messages. as far as dreams go, i confirm if a dream is from a deity through divination.

　౨ৎ　extra

there is a third kind, which combines both of them, but i find the only thing that falls under that intersection is divination. it relies both on an external component (a physical tool) and an internal component (the reader's interpretation).

　౨ৎ　how do i know which one xyz deity falls under?

usually, that would correspond with the deity's particular domains. for example, hermes usually uses external signs while apollon primarily uses internal signs or a mixture. it may differ based on your experiences, but i find that's usually how it works.

i hope this helps!

[edensvessel]

being your best self is not about being able to constantly perform your highest capacity, or about physically looking the best, or about constantly being love and light. it's about healing. that's something that i've come to realise lately. i don't have to always be kind and happy and sociable in order to be my best self, because the self differs from person to person. i need to nurture the self that i have, and to do that, i must first recognise my self. not myself—my self. there is the "i" and there is the "self". in order for "me" to integrate with my best "self", "i" must heal and my "self" must be nurtured. then they need to integrate. i still have to discover what my self desires and how it needs to be nurtured. what exactly my "self" is, i don't know. it's different from "i", and it's different from a soul. maybe it's a grey area between; or maybe it's a personification of everything i wish to ignore. maybe it's the other side of a soul, like the other side of the moon. all i know is it exists, and i cannot progress forward without tending to it.

[edensvessel]

making a playlist of songs i want to be played at my funeral and dedicating it to anpu btw

[edensvessel]

i also think om from om shanti om's speech applies here very well.

“…that life is like the movies. always a happy ending. and if the ending isn't happy, then…the film isn't over yet, friends. the film isn't over yet.”

by the way, everything is going to be ok