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aishangotome · 4 months ago

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Main Story Chapter 18 Card: Sariel - Windswept (长风吹彻) | Light and Night 光與夜之戀

Episode 3

CW: War Violence, death, cannibalism.

♡———♡

3138 Years Ago. Spring.

West of the Great Wilderness lies Kunlun, and upon Kunlun, glaciers remain unthawed for millennia.

A white fox traversed the boundless expanse of white snow. Every scene was so similar, yet he could discern the subtle differences in each snowflake.

??: Woo--

The white fox heard the barely audible sound, lowered his head, and discovered a bent little flower, seemingly crushed by his accidental step.

Ordinary flowers couldn’t bloom on this lifeless mountaintop, nor could they emit such a sound.

White Fox: You're like me?

The unopened bud remained silent, but the aura flowing through it grew weaker. The white fox raised a tail tip.

He could heal it, but with great care, using neither too much nor too little strength.

In the distance, the shadow of a withered forest loomed.

Long ago, he had tried to coax the dormant flowers and trees to grow. But then, he let them grow too fast. The towering trees couldn’t endure the thin, frigid air at that height and gradually withered.

The leaf before him trembled slightly, as if trying to say something.

White Fox: Don't urge me, urging me will only kill you faster.

Yet, in the next second, the white fox realized it wasn’t urging him, but trembling.

The ground rumbled, the fierce wind whipped up the snow, and the white fox leaped back, dodging a tiger's claw.

Tiger claws, a sheep's body, a leopard's teeth—the massive beast opened its maw towards the flower on the ground. It wasn't hungry, but the few creatures here always pursued the scent of life.

White Fox: Go away. Even if you eat, this is my prey.

His form was already considerable, yet he appeared thin compared to the ferocious beast.

Why protect this flower? He didn’t know. Not from meddling curiosity, nor from pity, but because he had injured it.

The beast growled deeply, its forepaws pounding the ground, faster and louder. The white fox lowered his body, his nine tails gradually spreading out.

In an instant, the two figures clashed. The beast's sharp teeth grazed the white fox's taut back, but it couldn't bite down.

Golden eyes narrowed, the white fox turned, his teeth already deeply embedded in its neck. The beast struggled, howling and shrieking, as if to overturn heaven and earth.

The white fox didn't let go. The massive black form grew sluggish, then collapsed with a thud.

He still didn't release his grip. Warm blood covered his teeth, cheeks, claws, and the snow-covered earth. In the depths, where it couldn’t be seen, the flower's roots were spreading.

Until, a series of light footsteps approached, and a Tibetan antelope stopped before the white fox, observing the scene, a letter hanging from its horns.

Tibetan Antelope: A great victory, child of the Qi family. Your talent grows ever purer.

What did 'victory' mean? What was 'talent'? The white fox raised his head. His fur was stained red, making his pale golden eyes appear particularly clear.

White Fox: It’s not a victory. I just killed it. I live, it died.

The Tibetan antelope smiled—a sheep shouldn’t have a smile, but it was changing, morphing into a wrinkled, yet perfectly formed face.

Old Man: Your day of transformation must be near. Speak to me as a human.

Old Man: Your parents and elder sister await you at home, far away.

The white fox tilted his head slightly.

Parents, elder sister—these words were unfamiliar, like something beyond thick clouds, yet strangely familiar, as if someone had spoken them before he was born.

The wind picked up. In the swirling snow, his paws turned into five fingers, his silver fur longer than ever. He unfolded his unfamiliar shoulders and slowly stood.

In the process, he realized he hadn't been using the language the Tibetan antelope spoke, but a low rumble, no different from the beast's growls.

He tried to speak the same words as the Tibetan antelope.

White Fox: Home… I… how long?

Old Man: Two hundred and seventy-five years—that's how long you've been on Kunlun Mountain.

Old Man: Your talent is strong and chaotic. Only here can you control it.

White Fox: I am…

The old man looked at him kindly, unfolded the letter, punctured with a small hole. It only had three words.

Old Man: Sariel. That’s your name, Sariel. (Qi Sili)

The thirteen or fourteen-year-old boy stared at them, blood still clinging to his lips and brows. These three words brought a world that couldn’t be understood through biting.

??: Sariel? Sariel, oh dear, wake up!

The boy was gently nudged a few times, opened his eyes, and first saw the round moon fading in the slightly whitening sky—the same moon that hadn't changed during his thousand-mile journey back to this royal city.

The scent of the snowy plains dissipated. Sariel sat up from the narrow edge of the bronze cauldron, shaking off the fallen leaves and petals that covered him, causing his mother to chuckle.

Sariel's Mother: How did you fall asleep here?

Sariel: I don’t like the house. The bed is stuffy and hot.

Sariel spoke slowly. It was his fifteenth day in human form, and he was still not accustomed to speaking, nor to beds.

Sariel's Mother: Who asked about that? Your father told you to practice with the bronze chopsticks, and here you are.

Sariel: I already know how.

Sariel stretched out his long tail, curled it around the bronze chopsticks on the stone table beside him, and dipped them into the nearby container, accurately picking up a small pebble.

His tail was slapped by his mother, and the pebble fell back into the container.

Sariel's Mother: No using your tail, use your hands. You'll be meeting the king tomorrow. What if he asks you to dine with him?

Sariel: The Emperor likes to see people pick things up with bronze chopsticks?

Sariel Mother: Well… probably not.

Sariel: Then why can’t I scoop food with a leaf?

Sariel's Mother: Because he definitely doesn’t like to see people eating with leaves.

The lady of the Qi family was still smiling, but her face turned pale, then white. The fur on his tail sensed danger, reminding Sariel to quickly say "oh."

Sariel: Humans are so strange.

Sariel's Mother: Strange, but also quite interesting, isn’t it?

Interesting? Sariel pondered.

He recalled passing through the central market of the city when he first entered. He didn’t know what a market was then, only that the place was incredibly crowded.

But despite the crowd, their actions were strangely similar. Wherever he went, gazes followed. Then, it wasn't just gazes, but colorful fruits.

Sariel instinctively raised his hands to catch the first one, then the second, and the third. Someone nearby handed him a wicker basket.

Shopkeeper: Young master of General Qi, consider this basket my gift to you.

Sariel: What do I do with this?

Shopkeeper: Ahead is the fish market. If you go further, they'll be throwing fish, and they're quite slippery.

Sariel: Why would they throw fish at me?

The human before him, with black hair and black eyes, smiled brightly and spoke as if singing, in short, rhythmic bursts.

Shopkeeper: Because everyone loves to look at you, of course.

Because they looked at him, they wanted to give him food, so strange and yet so interesting.

The full basket was still in the courtyard. His mother had turned some of the fish into dried fish, to be given to his elder sister, who had married into the palace years ago.

Sariel: By the way, Mother, you told me to find my elder sister. How do I find her?

Sariel's Mother: You don’t need to find her, and you wouldn't easily find her anyway. She will find you.

Sariel: But I don’t remember what she looks like.

Sariel's Mother: It doesn’t matter. When you meet, you will know each other.

Sariel's Mother: Just like me and your father, even after many years, we could recognize our own child at a glance.

Sariel watched his mother lightly leap up, sitting on the edge of the large cauldron with agility comparable to his own, her golden eyes gazing gently into the distance.

He knew where she was looking. He opened his mouth.

Sariel: After transforming, I had ten days of dreams, each one the same.

Sariel's Mother: Still about Kunlun Mountain?

Sariel: Yes. Why are they always the same?

Sariel's Mother: Because they left the deepest impression on you, and perhaps they made you the happiest.

His mother let out a small sigh, as if with relief, or perhaps a hint of regret.

Sariel paused. It would be many years before he knew that what he was about to do was called "throwing a tantrum," but even now, the boy felt a little embarrassed.

Sariel: But having the same dream all the time is boring. I want… dreams of here too.

His mother was taken aback, then smiled, winking mysteriously.

Sariel's Mother: Then how about this: tomorrow, when you return from the palace, we’ll go to the market and buy malt candy for you.

Sariel: Malt candy?

Sariel's Mother: Yes, sweet and sticky, you can eat it slowly for a long time.

Sariel remembered seeing a few round little creatures, who couldn't even walk properly, being fed this sticky stuff by their parents and clapping their hands with joy.

Sariel: I'm not like those little creatures, I don’t need to eat that…

Sariel's Mother: Really? You don't want to eat it?

Sariel: No, it’s just sweet and sticky, no different from soft fruits.

Sariel's Mother: It’s different, the sweetness and stickiness are different from fruit. I guarantee you won’t expect it.

Sariel was silent. His tail, which had been exposed, was now joined by a pair of fluffy ear tips on his head.

Sariel's Mother: So, do you want to eat it?

The boy hesitated for a long time, finally nodding heavily, his face flushed.

That night, as Sariel wished, for the first time, he dreamed not only of Kunlun Mountain, but also of the audience with the Emperor.

The human called Emperor was sitting on a tall tree, with a fish head, and strings of malt candy hung from the branches.

Even many years later, when he became the formidable General Qi and knew the Emperor didn’t have a fish head, he would still think with regret about that dream—

Sariel: If it were truly like that, it would be much more interesting.

Tomorrow, which didn’t feel like a distant day, arrived faster than expected.

In the center of the grand hall stood a boy in splendid attire, his silver hair neatly tied back. Apart from quietly mumbling something to himself, he appeared to be a well-mannered young noble.

The stern-faced man beside him whispered a gentle reminder with a hint of helplessness.

Sariel’s Father: The Emperor is coming. Silence.

Sariel: But Father, you just said the Emperor was coming. How much longer must we wait?

Sariel’s Father: He is the Emperor; any wait is normal.

Another rule with no reason. Sariel wrinkled his nose slightly. Before coming here, his father had told him many such rules to remember.

For example, his father was called General Qi, and because he had accomplished much for the Emperor, the Emperor shared his food and estate with him.

Also, if the Emperor didn’t ask him a question, he shouldn’t speak at all, and if the Emperor didn’t tell him to move, he shouldn’t take a step.

Moreover, the Emperor's place was always the highest, living on the tallest terrace in the city, and appearing from the highest point of the stairs.

Thinking this way, it was no wonder he was told not to take a step. Although the palace was high, it wouldn’t be difficult for him to leap onto the rafters, and then the Emperor wouldn’t be the highest.

A dull sound, like wind carrying stones, scraping across dried animal hides, caused Sariel to look up. The Emperor, amid this strange sound, walked casually behind the low table.

Emperor: You are the young master of the Qi family?

Sariel: Yes.

Emperor: The high shaman has divined your future. The gods tell me you will be victorious like your father.

Victory, that word again.

Sariel: I haven’t been victorious. A beast bothered me, and I killed it. Is that considered victory?

His father seemed to want to say something but didn’t. The Emperorlaughed heartily.

Emperor: Why not? Countless tribes have bothered our kingdom. You killing them is a great victory.

Emperor: Bring it forth—

A palace attendant, waiting nearby, stepped forward with a wooden box. Inside was a gleaming bronze sword. Sariel grasped the hilt and drew the sword.

Emperor: What do you think?

Sariel recalled his own claws and teeth, and shook his head.

Sariel: I don’t need it.

Emperor: Whether you use it or not is up to you. But carrying this sword means you, like your father, are a divinely appointed warrior.

Who are the gods? What I do, no one has ever appointed me. Sariel wanted to say this, but he heard his father cough lightly and pulled him down to thank the Emperor for the reward.

Sariel: Father, why did the Emperor give me this sword?

Outside the hall, Sariel ignored his father's constant reminders and turned to look at the slowly closing hall doors. A shaft of sunlight on the palace floor was growing narrower.

Sariel’s Father: It represents our mission. Not all spiritual beings are like you, with such talent.

Sariel’s Father: Most are weak. The Qi family must take responsibility for our people to coexist with humans.

His father said no more, looking behind Sariel and sighing with relief.

Sariel’s Father: It doesn’t matter if you don’t understand now. Your elder sister has arrived. Go meet her.

Sariel turned around. Beside the blooming peonies in front of the hall stood a woman. Though her clothes were simple, they were layered and intricate.

His mother was right. At a glance, Sariel recognized her.

Sariel: Elder sister.

The woman smiled, responding.

Sister: Yes, it's me.

His father went to the training field, and his elder sister didn’t keep him either, only nodding lightly. She led Sariel past the towering pavilions to a splendid palace.

Sariel: This is where sister lives?

Sister: Yes, what do you think?

Sariel: It’s better than the Emperor's hall. Not so many stairs.

His sister’s eyes widened, and she raised a finger to her lips. She dismissed the servants before taking Sariel’s hand, unable to suppress a smile.

Sister: Quite right. Even the Emperor has tripped on his robes on those stairs.

Sister: Little Sariel, you’re finally back. This is wonderful.

His sister repeated, looking him up and down, her eyes moist.

His mother had also cried when she saw him. Sariel couldn’t tell if it was happiness or sadness, so he awkwardly flicked his tail.

After flicking it, he remembered his father’s most serious warning: when out and about, absolutely control your beast form. His sister seemed to see his momentary distraction, and smiled through her tears.

Sister: It's alright, you don’t have to worry here.

Her gaze lingered on his bundled nine tails, a hint of envy in her eyes.

Sister: I haven’t seen my own tail since before I came here, I’m afraid.

Sariel: Sister, there’s a large garden outside. Why don’t we go there?

On the way, Sariel had noticed the garden with its scattered flowers and trees, thriving like a real forest. His sister nodded.

Sister: Yes, this palace is rather dull. Let’s take a walk in the garden.

Sariel: Let’s run!

Sariel corrected, his fingertips revealing sharp claws, as if already touching damp soil.

Sariel: Let’s go in our true forms. Then sister can see her tail too.

His sister, with a face similar to his, looked surprised. She hesitated briefly, then agreed.

The exquisite garden was but a small square, nothing compared to a corner of Kunlun Mountain, yet it seemed sufficient for his sister.

She circled the tree-hidden walls, round and round, and when she grew tired, she nibbled on the dried fish her mother had made, lying down beside the rocks, chewing little by little.

Sariel sat on the rocks, a faint memory flashing through his mind: the person who should have been circling was himself. Back then, he was too young to see clearly, and he had his sister’s tail fur in his mouth.

Sariel: Sister, do you like running around outside like this?

Sister: I do.

Sariel: On the way from Kunlun Mountain, there are many forests and gardens even bigger than this. Some are inhabited, some aren’t.

His sister lowered her head, her ears twitching slightly. When she looked up, she had turned into her human form, back to being the beautiful, noble concubine.

Sister: I’d like to go, but I can’t.

Sariel: Why can’t you?

Sister: Those are not the Emperor's lands.

The Emperor's lands? Sariel didn’t understand. Wasn’t land something everlasting?

The Emperor was like a tree growing on this land. When a tree withered, others grew. Which tree would claim the land as its own?

His sister raised her hand, tiptoed, and patted his neck.

Sister: Don’t think so much.

Sister: Even the Emperor is confined within this space, ceaselessly waging wars to conquer more places.

Sariel: Is that what the Emperor wants me to do for him?

He looked around, puzzled. The royal chariot was passing through the garden, and the Emperor on the high seat glanced at his massive form before looking away.

His sister saw the look and smiled, seemingly unconcerned.

Sister: I think so, yes.

They want to own land, so they build high walls. They want to go to more places, so they continuously wage war. Once understood, humans aren’t difficult to comprehend.

Sariel sat on a corner of the city wall, biting off the last bit of malt candy on the wooden stick. The wind was strong today, but if it threatened to unbalance him, he had learned to use his hands, not his tail, to support himself.

Heavy smoke billowed on the horizon, tiny black figures, like ants, lined up in columns, marching toward it. Sariel tried to distinguish his father's silhouette among them.

Inside the city, lights flickered too, for the harvest festival, celebrating the people's possession of the most fertile land and the spirit race that could nurture crops.

Abundant produce brought the same festive scene inside and outside the city.

More than half a year had passed since his return from the palace audience, enough time to explore every street and alley of the royal city, to develop the good habit of carrying wisteria vines, to avoid wasting the carp thrown from the moat.

It was also enough time to memorize countless military treatises, to earn an invincible reputation in the soldiers' drills, and to find a few people worth befriending.

Like Chen Yang, who always sneaked out of the camp at midnight, passionate about catching fish in Yanbo Lake, and who always shared his grilled fish with Sariel—those carp that hadn’t been turned into dried fish had found a use.

Or like Tian Gui, who had challenged Sariel three hundred and eighty-one times, in everything from martial arts to drinking, from musical instruments to weaponry, never winning but never discouraged.

The three hundred and eighty-second challenge was rumored to be a fish-eating contest; Chen Yang, the self appointed referee, declared the outcome determined without even beginning.

They trained together, lived together, practiced swordsmanship on the city walls at dawn and dusk, and, of course, did the kinds of things that even young dogs would refuse.

??: Sariel, a once-in-a-lifetime good day, and you're just standing here daydreaming!

A voice louder than a broken gong echoed, and Sariel looked down, seeing two bright-eyed youths, each clad in black, with masked faces.

Sariel: Chen Yang, Tian Gui, what are you guys doing here?

Tian Gui: Today, everyone in the camp not going to war is at the celebration, having fun. No one is guarding the armory, what do you think?

Sariel: You're going to steal wine and meat again? How dull.

Sariel jumped down from the city wall. Tian Gui covered his eyes, peeking through his fingers as Sariel landed lightly. No matter how many times he saw it, he still thought it was easy to break a leg that way.

Tian Gui: Then suggest something more interesting?

Sariel extended a fingertip, where a wooden key dangled.

Sariel: No one is guarding the stables today, either. There are a few good horses that no one has ridden yet.

On the clear night, with the moon hidden, the stars shone brightly. The city gate guards, drunk, waved the young general Qi through.

The wind whipped Sariel's hair, whistling in his ears, mixed with the shouts of the two behind him.

Tian Gui: Sariel, those are the emperor’s chosen steeds! If we’re caught, you’ll be standing at the city gates with a sign!

Chen Yang: Those horses are good, but, ouch, no saddles!

After their warnings, they both laughed into the wind.

Tian Gui: I’ve always wanted to try drinking on horseback at full gallop, but too bad we didn’t bring any wine.

Chen Yang: You’ll try that when you’re tired of living!

Sariel: If you choke to death, we’ll have to fabricate a less ridiculous cause of death for you.

The untamed horses carried the young men, as if to leave the entire city behind, just as he had rushed to it, leaving the Kunlun Mountains far behind.

The horses stopped on a high hill. Sariel hadn't controlled their direction, but he couldn't deny it was the place he had envisioned.

Below, the marching army moved, the totems on the soldiers' dark armor becoming clear, but their heads were lowered, and the scattered torches didn't illuminate their faces.

Chen Yang and Tian Gui arrived, too. Tian Gui was still complaining that even on horseback, he couldn't keep up with Sariel. Chen Yang nudged him with his elbow, telling him to shut up.

They dismounted and stood beside Sariel.

Chen Yang: Is that General Qi's army below?

Sariel: This is the slowest my father's troops have moved in his three campaigns over the past two months.

A faint metallic scent hung in the air, the smell of armor and weapons. The soldiers had cleaned them thoroughly, but the odor was hard to dispel quickly.

Chen Yang: There's a severe drought everywhere this year, only we still have a good harvest, thanks to the spirit race. Others are bound to be envious.

Chen Yang: Plus, this is prime time for conquest. The number of battles has more than doubled.

Tian Gui: Indeed. Look at General Qi's warhorse, it's so tired it's staggering.

Sariel stared at the tall brown horse at the front of the column. As a warhorse, it was old and its gait was unsteady, but his father hadn't replaced it.

His father was also aging. The lifespan of a spirit race with meager talent was no different from an ordinary human, and those with strong talent aged more slowly, but whether it was hundreds of years or more, time would still catch up with him.

Almost everyone in the royal city recognized Sariel, calling him Young General Qi. When he heard this title, his father always smiled with relief but never mentioned taking him to the battlefield.

The bronze sword bestowed by the Emperor hung silently in the general's mansion hall, waiting for something, and that something was steadily approaching.

Sariel: We'll soon be ordered to march.

Chen Yang and Tian Gui were startled, looking down at their hands in unison. They had been holding weapons for half a year, developing thick calluses.

Tian Gui swallowed.

Tian Gui: That... is a bit sudden.

Sariel: Are you afraid?

Tian Gui: Afraid? What am I afraid of? I'm excited! Think of all the military merits waiting for me!

Tian Gui's face flushed. He stamped his foot and ran to the edge of the hill, tilted his head back, and cupped his hands around his mouth.

Tian Gui: Your son is going to make you proud! You'd better watch from up there!

After shouting, he sniffed loudly. Sariel vaguely remembered Chen Yang saying that Tian Gui's parents had died on the battlefield when he was very young.

Chen Yang: I'm a little scared, though. I'm not as skilled as you two, and I'm afraid of pain.

Chen Yang sat on the ground, smiling at Sariel.

Chen Yang: Do you remember when we sneaked out to catch fish at midnight and were caught by the centurion?

Chen Yang: You're the most capable, and you're General Qi's son, so he didn't make things difficult for you.

Chen Yang: I was supposed to be punished with Tian Gui, but standing in front of the camp with a sign was too embarrassing, so I ran away, leaving him.

Chen Yang: Not to mention life and death matters, what if I run away again...

Sariel: What if you run away again?

Sariel: Living is winning, dying is losing. Why would you choose to die?

Chen Yang looked up in surprise, realizing that his often sarcastic friend was serious this time.

Tian Gui: Exactly. We three brothers swore an oath, not asking to be born on the same day, but only asking to die on the same day.

Tian Gui: Chen Yang, if you're so worried about saving your own skin, don't drag us down with you.

Sariel frowned, as if Tian Gui had suddenly grown eight horns.

Sariel: Did you swear that in your dreams? I have no recollection, and I don't remember when I gained you as a brother.

Tian Gui: Heh, I don't remember either. Let's make an oath now, it's not too late.

Tian Gui sat beside Chen Yang, pulling Sariel down with him, breaking off three blades of grass and handing one to each of them.

Tian Gui: Who goes first?

Chen Yang: I'll go first.

Chen Yang raised the blade of grass, pressed it against his forehead, and said solemnly.

Chen Yang: I swear, I will never abandon Sariel and Tian Gui in battle, and will advance and retreat with them, sharing weal and woe.

Tian Gui: Good! It might not be the same day, but it sounds right.

Tian Gui: I have to say something good, too.

He thought hard for a moment, scratched his head, and coughed twice.

Tian Gui: I swear if Chen Yang and Sariel don't get any military merit, I'll share mine with them, no secrets.

Chen Yang: What kind of oath is that?

Tian Gui: You talked about all that profound stuff, can't I say something practical?

Two pairs of eyes turned to their silent companion. Sariel looked up as if daydreaming or watching the moon. When he came back to his senses, his eyes were exceptionally bright.

Sariel: I swear—

The wind swept the blades of grass from their hands, faintly flying down the hill and disappearing into the black, serpentine line of troops.

In the distance, the Kunlun Mountains were a small dot, and behind them, the royal city was blurred in the night.

Beasts, snow lotuses, his father, mother, sister, Chen Yang, Tian Gui, the fishmonger who gave him wisteria vines, and the Emperor sitting in the empty hall.

What vows had they made, what wishes did they have, and what did those wishes have to do with him?

Sariel pondered these questions, and for a moment, he felt like this land belonged to him.

So he opened his mouth, perhaps to say to his friends or to others—

Sariel: I swear, I will only win, and never lose.

As soon as he finished speaking, Tian Gui shouted that Sariel was indeed using that trick to charm all the girls in the city, and Chen Yang said that he was worthy of being a general's son to say such powerful words.

Young people's oaths were often unreliable. The wind didn't take them seriously, heaven didn't take them seriously, and after a while, even they themselves didn't take them seriously.

But years later, if one day, the old Chen Yang and Tian Gui remembered that starry night's laughter, remembered Sariel and all his wars.

They would know that it was the most solemn and costly oath a person could ever make.

3135 Years Ago. Early Autumn.

What is the purpose of war?

Chen Yang: Sari— General Qi, the banquet has just begun, why are you hiding here alone?

Chen Yang: Everyone is looking for you, look, your wine is already poured.

Sariel: If you want to drink, drink. Why bother me?

Chen Yang: But you're our general now. If you don't set an example, who dares to indulge?

Sariel: Annoying.

Chen Yang: Hey, don't let Tian Gui hear you say that. He dreams of leading the toast one day.

Sariel: Then let him do it before our next campaign.

Chen Yang: Would the Emperor allow that? Alright, alright, drink up.

Sariel: This wine is awful, I don't know how much water they've mixed in.

Chen Yang: I know, it's nowhere near as good as the plum wine from your home. But for us, any wine we can drink freely is good wine.

Chen Yang: Once we set off in two days, who knows when we'll be able to feast and drink like this again.

Sariel: Half a month.

Chen Yang: Huh?

Sariel: Didn't you ask when? Half a month at most, and Lu City will fall.

Chen Yang: I'm just surprised. This is a siege, different from a field battle.

Sariel: What's the difference? Stones aren't necessarily more troublesome than enemy armor.

Chen Yang: True, you spirit folk can climb walls and cliffs, city walls are nothing to you.

Tian Gui: Aha, both of you are hiding from the wine!

Chen Yang: You, on the other hand, never refuse a drink. Be careful not to get too drunk to wake up for departure.

Tian Gui: Heh heh, worst case, I'll get a splash of cold water from Sariel. It wouldn't be the first time.

Chen Yang: It's General Qi now, still not used to it?

Sariel: If you can't get used to it, then don't.

Sariel: I'd rather listen to carpenters sawing wood at the east gate than your affected tones.

Tian Gui: Hahahaha, truly my good brother. I heard it just now.

Tian Gui: The general said, in half a month, we'll be back to enjoy the victory feast!

Sariel: Who said anything about a feast? Don't put your words in my mouth.

Tian Gui: Even if you don't say it, everyone knows that as long as we go to battle with you, there's no way we won't achieve merit. Isn't that right?

Soldier A: Yes! The general is so fierce on the battlefield, he can stop babies from crying at night.

Soldier B: If you can't speak properly, don't speak. He's clearly handsome beyond compare, making babies smile.

Soldier B: Also, I heard that the general can bring the dead back to life with a flick of his finger. Is...is that true?

Sariel: Never heard that. Why don't one of you die first and let me practice my technique?

Chen Yang: The general can heal injuries instantly, but not death. Watch your lives and don't lose them.

Soldier A: General, Lieutenant.

Tian Gui: It smells so good, what is it?

Soldier A: It's sweet wine, try it, see how it tastes.

Sariel: Too many fruits, too sweet. Less would make it smoother.

Soldier A: As expected of the general. This is my first time brewing it myself.

Sariel: It's much better than the wine at the banquet. You used peaches, plums, and dates. Is there a celebration at your home?

Soldier A: I'm getting married when we return this time.

Soldier A: My wife loves a good celebration. I want everyone to come on that day and make her happy.

Tian Gui: Great! That's wonderful news. Sariel, will you go?

Soldier A: The general has shown me great favor. It's alright if others don't come, but the general must come.

Sariel: How have I shown you favor? I don't recall.

Soldier A: Has the general forgotten? During the campaign against Peng, you charged alone, throwing their ranks into disarray.

Soldier A: I volunteered to cut off their supply line from the rear. You approved and said if I succeeded, you'd go with me. There was no need to ask.

Sariel: I remember now. But it was you who volunteered, you who cut off their supplies, and you who reported back.

Sariel: I haven't shown you any favor, let alone any special kindness.

Soldier A: General...

Sariel: It's my first time attending a wedding. I don't know what gift to give. Would jade be useful to you?

Soldier A: Ge— No, no need, thank you, General, thank you!

Chen Yang: Do you think he meant jade wasn't useful, or that there's no need for a gift?

Tian Gui: Ah, this makes me want to get married too. I'm decent-looking, with plenty of merits, why doesn't any girl fancy me?

Chen Yang: On your own, you might be considered good, but standing next to Sariel—

Tian Gui: What?

Chen Yang: The girls won't even look at you.

Tian Gui: Oh yeah, Chen Yang, you're the same as me. No one looks at you either!

Chen Yang: I'm in no rush to get married. I'm happy enough to sneak out with you for a midnight horse ride and steal the old general's wine.

Chen Yang: I plan to enjoy this kind of life for a while longer.

Tian Gui: Why don't you ask if we still want to hang out with you? Sariel, tell us, what do you want to do after this?

Sariel: Win the next battle.

Chen Yang: And after that?

Sariel: Win the next one.

Chen Yang: There has to be a reason for fighting, right? For merit and titles, for the glory of your ancestors... Why are you all shaking your heads?

Sariel: Tian Gui is learning the panpipes. He can't play at all, it sounds like a ghost crying every day, but he hasn't given up.

Sariel: I can fight, and I can win. Why shouldn't I?

Soldier B: Reporting. General Qi, the old general and his wife are waiting outside and request your presence.

Sariel: Understood. They come every time, never tiring of it.

Sariel's Mother: Little Sariel, over here.

Sariel: Father, Mother, what are you doing here?

Sariel's Mother: We brought you something. We were going to leave it and go, but we thought we should see you one last time.

Sariel's Mother: This is a war helmet your sister took from the Emperor's treasury. It's said to be made of black iron from the sacred mountain, able to withstand a fatal blow.

Sariel: I—

Sariel's Mother: I know you're invincible and prefer to fight unburdened, but you must wear this.

Sariel: ...Did the Emperor know when my sister took it?

Sariel's Mother: The Emperor has many treasures, he won't miss this one. At worst, you can have her return it when you're done.

Sariel: Father, do you agree with this?

Sariel's Father: This is thread I prayed for from the sun, moon, rivers, mountains, and the Great Shaman. Here, give me your hand.

Sariel's Mother: Tie half to your wrist, and tie the other half to our door, to ensure you return home safe and sound.

Sariel: There are so many threads here.

Sariel's Mother: We're afraid you might accidentally break it, so keep these spares with you.

Sariel's Father: But remember, armor and spiritual objects are secondary. Be careful in everything you do.

Sariel: Father.

Sariel: Someone asked me today, what is the purpose of war? Do you know?

Sariel's Father: The spirit race has a long life, you have plenty of time to think about it, no need to rush for my answer.

Sariel's Father: Curfew is approaching, you should go.

Sariel's Mother: I think the purpose of war is to return home.

Sariel: You're crying again.

Sariel's Mother: I... I dreamed last night that you and your sister turned into foxes and ran into the deep forest, never to be seen again.

Sariel: Why cry over that? When you call us, don't we come back?

Sariel's Mother: You really know how to ruin the mood.

Sariel's Mother: You're getting less and less lovable as you grow up. You were so much better before, clinging to your mother wherever you went.

Sariel: That's only because I was a blind fox cub who had to be carried around by you.

Tian Gui: Sariel, why are you only back now? The banquet is almost over.

Sariel: Do me a favor.

Chen Yang: This is... red thread?

Sariel: Any soldier in the army who has no parents and no home, give them a piece.

Sariel: Have them tie half and give me the other half.

Tian Gui: What's the use of this?

Sariel: Tomorrow morning, I'll go home and tie them to my door.

Sariel: Consider it giving them a place to return to.

Chen Yang: Alright, leave it to us!

Sariel: Chen Yang.

Chen Yang: Hmm? What else?

Sariel: Nothing, I'll go myself.

Soldier A: General Qi.

Soldier B: General Qi.

Sariel: All good things must come to an end.

Sariel: We'll just have to hold another banquet when we celebrate our victory.

Soldiers: Yes!

3135 Years Ago. Autumn.

Lu City marked Sariel's seventeenth victory. That number, Sariel didn't keep track of; it was Chen Yang who faithfully recorded it after each battle.

The enemy's armor was covered in bestial totems, their swords and spears shaped like sharpened claws and fangs. They sought his death, and he sought his survival.

Sariel's forces were always small; he never really needed anyone else, capable of cleaving through the vast enemy armies on his own.

When the battle was over, he returned. One territory after another fell to the Emperor, and the Emperor would dispatch others to claim them. His sister, accompanying the Emperor on a tour, paused for a long time at a place closest to Mount Kunlun.

Upon her return, she smiled and said, "Who would have thought, after expending so much effort, the place the king desired was our very origin? It's for the best; it's been too long since I felt the winds of Kunlun."

The previous sixteen campaigns had all been uniformly victorious. The seventeenth should have been no different.

The fall of Lu City was exceptionally swift, yet it was the first time he had breached a city, and the first time he had stepped into a conquered citadel.

The city's residents stood at their doorways, and what he saw was an array of the elderly and the vulnerable; they were the abandoned, incapable of fighting, with nowhere to flee.

Sariel reined in his horse; when the sound of hooves faded, an old man before him prostrated himself on the ground.

Old Man: I can groom horses, I can groom the soldiers' horses.

Sariel: I don't need you to groom horses. What are all of you doing here?

What he said was his genuine intent, yet the old man seemed deaf, muttering incessantly.

Old Man: Mercy, mercy, mercy...

A chorus of sobs erupted, a young child's eyes covered by his mother's hands. He cried out "Father," only to have his mouth muffled.

An armored soldier stepped forward, cupping his fist to Sariel in salute.

Soldier: General, the city holds one thousand two hundred souls. The count is complete, awaiting your command.

Sariel paused, taken aback.

Command? How was he to command these people? They held no weapons, they hadn't charged with menacing expressions, nor had they issued the roars of the enemy, only ceaseless weeping.

Soldier: Shall they be forced into servitude, or slain to instill fear?

Sariel's spear struck the ground, the soldier looking up in confusion, only to see the young general's retreating back.

Sariel: Let them return to what they were doing before.

That night, Sariel's forces made camp within the city. The residents, still seemingly fearful, voluntarily cleaned houses, groomed horses, and brought food and wine.

Little Girl: This, this is wine my family made, please... please, accept it...

Sariel and Chen Yang sat by the fire, the girl trembling as she held out a bowl of wine, barely managing to finish her words.

Sariel: I won't drink.

Little Girl: My family's wine is the best...

The girl's hands shook more violently, the wine spilling onto Sariel's leg armor.

Sariel frowned, reaching for the earthen bowl. The wine within was coarsely made, dregs settling on the bottom, the aroma sour.

A single glance from him was enough to make the girl feel something, and tears began to stream down her face.

Little Girl: Is it... is it not good? Please don't be angry, mercy...

Mercy. He had heard that word too many times today. An indescribable emotion swelled in Sariel's chest. Seeing this, Chen Yang smiled at the girl.

Chen Yang: It's fine, you can go, don't come here again.

The girl ran off without looking back, surprisingly swift and light-footed, as if a great weight had been lifted.

Sariel: I didn't say anything.

Chen Yang: When your life hangs by another's blade, you are naturally more cautious.

Chen Yang: Today, your presence saved them; tomorrow, another might arrive, and things could be different.

Chen Yang added wood to the fire, his expression indifferent, as if this was commonplace, making him seem like a stranger.

Sariel: How do you know?

Chen Yang: I heard it from the other soldiers. City sieges are hard, but everyone wants to go, because there are many rewards.

Chen Yang: Kill if you want, take money if you want, no one will stop you, and you'll get the credit.

Chen Yang: Actually, I'm grateful to serve under you. You prefer fighting in the open, so I don't have to see scenes like today's.

Sariel was silent, gazing at the earthen bowl, taking a sip, the wine as bad as he imagined.

But if he spoke those words to the girl, as he normally would, what fear would it cause her?

The wine reflected his face, and he suddenly recalled the snow lotus he had unintentionally crushed on Mount Kunlun. Now, it seemed he had trampled several more.

A thin mist rose with the night, the moonlight dim, and everything was indistinct in the darkness.

Sariel didn't go to the house prepared for him in the city center, nor did he tell anyone. He simply sat on the city wall, as he did in the royal city.

The city's fires gradually died out, and because of his order against destruction, the tranquil city was likely no different from before they arrived.

The journey to Lu City took five days; he had endured longer treks, and fatigue was still far off.

But today, he longed to rest for a moment, perhaps to shake off some heavy burden within him.

Sariel was startled awake by a scream.

He stood up, and his eyes met a blood-red blaze.

The city's houses were ablaze, the clash of weapons and cries of agony echoing from all sides.

Human figures lay strewn across the streets, their inner garments charred black, only a piece of armor haphazardly strapped to their chests.

Two soldiers in enemy armor stood nearby, the old man who had earlier groveled on the ground stepping forward, hacking at a corpse with his firewood chopper.

They roared with laughter, about to cheer, when a warm sensation spread across their necks. Blood gushed out, and their last sight was of bestial eyes.

The knife fell from the old man's hands. His mouth gaped, but no sound emerged. The approaching shadow bore sharp claws, and something dripped from their tips.

Sariel: Who killed him? Was it you?

Old Man: No, not me! I only followed the soldiers' orders.

Old Man: It was them, they hid in the huts, told us to set fires in the night! Said reinforcements were coming!

The bestial eyes shifted to the chopper at his feet.

Sariel: He didn't kill you. Why did you want to kill him?

The stench of blood and the wind rushed closer, the old man screaming in terror, but the anticipated agony never came.

Sariel moved through the inferno, faster than any horse, leaving a trail of intense killing intent. He rescued one person, two, three...

More were trapped beneath fallen beams, stabbed through the chest by vengeful citizens. A dying soldier clutched at Sariel's trousers.

Soldier: General Sariel, I'm done for. Please, save this child--

A thin, unconscious girl lay beside him, the same girl who had offered Sariel wine, as timid as a frightened bird. Did she also set fires?

The soldier seemed to read his thoughts, his grip tightening, his hoarse voice fading.

Soldier: General, my daughter... she's also around her age...

Sariel's palm was scratched raw by sharp claws. As the house collapsed, he bent down, scooped up the girl, and leapt through an opening.

The dead garrison and the entire city were a trap, and he hadn't seen it, his mind held captive by those expressions of despair.

His soldiers seemed to finally regain their wits, gathering in small groups. He found Tian Gui, fighting desperately with a handful of men.

Tian Gui: Sariel! Are you alright?

Sariel: I'm fine. Take everyone who can still move and get out through the side gate.

Tian Gui: What about you?

Sariel paused, the buzzing of slaughter in his ears finally fading. He heard the steady, heavy footsteps of the enemy reinforcements.

Sariel: I'll meet you outside the ridge at dawn.

Marching all night was no easy feat. The commander in dark blue armor breathed a sigh of relief as the silhouette of Lu City finally appeared in the distance.

Black smoke billowed in the air, the city engulfed in flames. This rescue mission, with the advantage of timing and terrain, was hardly a challenge.

Then, something caught his eye. A tall, slender figure had appeared between him and Lu City, a man and a spear, almost as one.

For some reason, this soldier wore no armor, only patches of blood.

Commander: Who are you? Standing there, are you courting death!

Sariel: Sariel.

In an instant, the spear was at his face, and he realized that the other man had just answered his question.

The night had been too long. A sliver of dawn finally broke on the horizon, leaving a scattered troop on the wasteland, wondering if the attacker was man or phantom.

Sariel rode along the hills, his vision blurred. The stolen warhorse, exhausted, crashed to the ground.

He tried to use his gift to heal himself, but the warm power in his fingertips wouldn't coalesce.

His hands were claws, and his eyes revealed his fox nature. Sariel couldn't retract them; he needed the bestial form to keep moving.

Or perhaps, he could no longer move. Thousands of men, it was too many.

He saw a humble thatched hut by the roadside. An old woman, her face etched with worry, peered toward Lu City from behind the low earthen wall.

Her gaze met Sariel's bloodied form and ferocious eyes, and her face turned white.

Sariel looked away. He had killed too many tonight. His spear tip dragged on the ground, supporting his body, making a heavy scraping sound.

The old woman hesitated, then shakily opened the gate.

Old Woman: Your wounds are too severe, you need bandaging.

He shouldn’t trust words like this anymore.

Sariel met the old woman's eyes and saw a familiar look. The dying soldier who had spoken of his daughter had the same look.

This woman likely had children close to his age.

Old Woman: Child, wherever you're going, you need to bandage your wounds before you travel. Come in.

Sariel: ...Give me a basin of water.

Finally, he dragged his heavy steps into the dimly lit thatched hut.

The old woman lit an oil lamp, placed water and a set of hemp clothes before him, and then left. Through the single door, Sariel heard the crackling of firewood.

He took off his bloodied clothes and cleaned his wounds.

He had suffered many such wounds before, their rapid and complete healing due to his gift. Now, a backlash of pain accompanied by a high fever overwhelmed him.

He tilted his head back, leaning against the corner of the wall, his eyes tightly closed, his consciousness gradually fading. He heard footsteps, and it seemed his bloodied clothes were being taken away.

After a moment, the rim of a bowl touched his hand, the room filling with the light fragrance of rice soup.

Old Woman: This is all I have, have a little.

Sariel extended his fingers, touching the warm vessel. He wasn't hungry; this was enough.

As he completely lost consciousness, he had a dream.

It was when he inherited his father's title. The "little" before General Sariel's name was finally removed. His father looked at him with complex emotions, and his mother cried once more.

Sariel's Father: From now on, many will entrust their lives to you. You cannot fail them.

Sariel: I will lead them to victory, as before.

Sariel's Father: Even the greatest power has its limits. There is no one in this world who can truly win forever.

Sariel's Father: You will make many decisions. When you cannot decide, think like a beast.

At that time, he did not understand his father’s words. He had always been taught to maintain his human form, to suppress his fox nature, but now it was reversed.

But now—he opened his eyes, the bestial marks gone—he seemed to understand.

Indeed, he should not think like a beast. He should think like a blade, a spear, without compassion, without wavering.

Yet he had a father, a mother, countless comrades, and he understood their feelings.

Looking around, the hut was empty. The old woman had probably gone out.

He didn't know how much time had passed, but Sariel felt a faint flow of spiritual energy returning, and his wounds began to heal.

A few low whistles came from afar, like the call of a partridge. It was the signal Chen Yang used when they went out to fish at night with Tian Gui.

He thought for a moment, then struggled to his feet, removed the jade pendant hanging from his spear, and placed it by the basin, which now held fresh water.

In the forest behind the hut, Sariel found Tian Gui and Chen Yang, and the small group of soldiers they led.

Tian Gui: Sariel! We finally found you!

Chen Yang: We didn't see you at dawn, so we had to search back.

Both were covered in blood, but they smiled at the sight of Sariel. He felt a measure of relief.

Sariel: How are the others?

Chen Yang: Thanks to you holding off the reinforcements, many managed to escape.

Sariel nodded slightly and looked at his comrades. Their eyes asked, “General, where do we go next?”

Sariel: I'll heal your wounds first.

Chen Yang: Your wounds are severe too, save some spiritual energy. We can still manage since we made it this far.

Sariel: I'm fine, I know my limits. I treated my injuries at a nearby home.

Sariel gathered his spiritual energy, letting it flow through the soldiers’ wounds. He was not fully recovered, and could only provide pain relief, far from a complete cure.

But they were grateful. Sariel avoided their thankful gazes.

Sariel: Let’s move out. We'll camp outside the ridge until dark, you need rest.

Chen Yang: What about the people in the house?

Chen Yang suddenly spoke, his face pale. Sariel lowered his head, thought for a moment, then shook his head.

Sariel: Leave them be, she doesn't know my identity.

The group quietly moved through the forest, led by Sariel.

Tian Gui, who had only minor injuries, was in good spirits, either vowing to return with Sariel after resting, or telling jokes.

Unexpectedly, Sariel joined in. The soldiers, listening to their banter, finally began to shake off the shadow of death that had hung over them all night.

But they gradually realized that one voice was missing from their usual banter.

Sariel: Where’s Chen Yang?

Tian Gui: Crap, he must have gotten lost in the woods. I'll go find him!

A sense of dread washed over Sariel, and he stopped Tian Gui.

Sariel: I'm faster, you take the others and keep going.

Chen Yang: No need, I'm back.

Chen Yang's voice came from the rear. Tian Gui paused, then stamped his foot.

Tian Gui: You idiot, glad you found your way back. Why didn't you stick with us?

Chen Yang: Because I wasn't lost.

The soldiers in the back stopped, looking surprised as Chen Yang slowly approached.

The light filtering through the leaves illuminated Chen Yang’s ashen face. He was covered in blood and held his sword, his fingers trembling as if he feared it.

Chen Yang: General.

He knelt before Sariel, an action none of them had ever taken before. The premonition became reality.

Sariel: What did you do?

Chen Yang: Lu City’s pursuers were still searching nearby. I wanted to erase our tracks.

Tian Gui: Did you kill more enemies? Why are you like this? You've killed before.

Tian Gui: Our General Qi won't blame you for leaving the group.

Chen Yang seemed to ignore Tian Gui, who was trying to pull him up.

Chen Yang: I met the old woman and her son. He found out you were at their home and was going to report to the enemy.

Chen Yang: I... killed him.

The old woman did have a son who hadn't returned. Sariel's breath hitched.

Sariel: And then?

Chen Yang’s head sank lower, and he gritted his teeth, his voice a wail.

Chen Yang: ...The old woman saw, she attacked me, and died by my blade.

Tian Gui: What?!

Tian Gui shouted, his face turning crimson.

Tian Gui: Chen Yang, where's your common sense? She was the general’s benefactor!

Chen Yang: I was afraid... afraid they’d bring the enemy...

Tian Gui: So what if they came? We can handle a few bandits!

Tian Gui: If they don’t ambush us, a hundred of them aren't my match!

Tears streamed down Chen Yang’s face, landing on the ground before him. He finally sobbed.

Chen Yang: What if we couldn't win... What if they brought them...

Chen Yang: So many brothers died in Lu City.

Chen Yang: If you all die too, I'm scared... Tian Gui, General... I’m so scared...

Chen Yang: I don’t know how, I don't know how I killed her...

Tian Gui ripped off his helmet and threw it to the ground.

Tian Gui: You think you're the only one scared? I'm scared too... and I'm angry, I want to avenge our brothers!

Tian Gui: I want those people to scream worse than our brothers did!

The cheerful Tian Gui was gone. Tian Gui also wept, his face streaked with mud, looking comical.

The sobbing among the ranks grew louder.

A strange pain struck Sariel, forcing him to close his eyes.

He remembered Chen Yang saying he couldn't stand the sight of civilians pleading for mercy.

He remembered Tian Gui always joking, the camp's yellow dog biting him every time, yet he always brought it meat jerky he couldn't afford himself.

How could such people kill helpless civilians? When did they learn to hide their pain with laughter?

The battlefield had changed them all.

Chen Yang: General, I know I've made a terrible mistake. I accept my punishment. Please, decide my fate.

Chen Yang had stopped crying, his voice hoarse but calm.

Sariel opened his eyes, picked up Chen Yang’s sword, and placed it across his shoulders. Tian Gui knelt beside Chen Yang.

Tian Gui: Sari-... General Qi, please, be lenient with Chen Yang.

Tian Gui: Make him do hard labor, banish him from the capital... we've lost so many, we can't lose any more...

Sariel: I won't punish him. He didn’t do wrong.

Sariel lowered the sword.

Sariel: I am the one who is wrong.

He had wavered, failing to anticipate the enemy's counterattack. He had accepted the old woman's help, despite knowing the situation was critical.

He had failed to see Chen Yang's fear when he asked that question.

He had underestimated the war, and now he tasted the bitter fruit.

When he first took human form, Sariel thought the royal city was much more interesting than Mount Kunlun.

People cried when they were happy, cried when they were sad, laughed when a new life arrived, and drank and made merry when someone departed.

How strange. Once he understood them, he would feel these emotions too, he thought. He learned quickly. It wouldn't be long.

Sariel didn't know that when that day came, he would wish he was still an ignorant fox.

It was too late. A beast turned human could never go back.

He saw the fear on his soldiers’ faces. Others’ children, parents, and lovers died on the battlefield, and they were hated for it.

When they died, their families would hate too, endlessly.

Soldier: General! It’s not your fault. From now on, we will never…

Never what? Show mercy? Show compassion?

Before their fear turned to bloodlust, Sariel spoke again.

Sariel: We will continue as before. After entering a city, our troops will not harm the innocent.

Sariel: But if they attack, I will ensure none return.

Sariel: The events of last night will not be repeated.

His eyes held an aura of ruthless determination, and the soldiers cupped their fists and knelt, responding in unison.

Was this choice right or wrong? Sariel couldn't foresee. He only wished that these men wouldn't lose all traces of themselves.

If someone had to kill, he would be that person. If someone had to die because of it, he would be that person too.

He would bear the weight of those sins, one by one, throughout his long life, until he was no longer himself.

Staying still would offer no answers; he had to move forward, until fate led him to his end.

3135 Years Ago. Late Autumn.

I am your general.

Sariel: How is the army faring?

Tian Gui: We lost twenty percent of our soldiers, half of whom are missing. Given the situation that day, they’re probably either captured or...

Sariel: I see. And Chen Yang?

Tian Gui: He... well, you know his temperament. He’s been sitting by the river. I’m afraid he’s losing hope.

Sariel: Keep an eye on him.

Tian Gui: I will. Sariel, maybe I shouldn’t say this, but you don't have to be so disheartened.

Tian Gui: After all, we won the battle at Lu City.

Sariel: It should have been an easier victory. Twenty percent is too high a price.

Tian Gui: Are you aware how many armies, like ours, have only suffered a few casualties in each battle?

Sariel: None. Are you saying that a twenty percent loss is considered normal?

Tian Gui: How... how did you know?

Sariel: What others do, whether it's common or not, has nothing to do with me. I know in my heart that they shouldn’t have died.

Tian Gui: I just wanted you to stop blaming yourself.

Tian Gui: If you had been leading then, my parents would probably still be alive, watching me grow up.

Sariel: ...Thank you.

Tian Gui: This is the first time you’ve thanked me. It makes it all worthwhile.

Sariel: Since it’s worthwhile, I suppose I don’t need you to distribute these things.

Tian Gui: Food and wine? Where did so much come from?

Sariel: For the Emperor, Lu City was also a victory. These are the rewards that arrived this morning.

Tian Gui: You said distribute... Does that mean we’re having a feast tonight?!

Sariel: What’s so surprising?

Tian Gui: I thought you wouldn’t allow us to celebrate.

Sariel: I promised you that the wine we drank before setting out would be drunk again. That won't change.

Sariel: Besides, now that we have these things, why wouldn't we eat and drink?

Tian Gui: I feel relieved seeing you like this.

Sariel: I wasn't disheartened in the first place. I don’t know what you were worried about.

Tian Gui: Then why haven't you said a word for days?

Sariel: I was thinking.

Tian Gui: Thinking—?

Sariel: Thinking that I am your general.

Tian Gui: Ah, what does that mean?

Sariel: I'm leaving the camp tonight. If I’m not back by dawn, take the soldiers and leave first.

Sariel: Don’t delay your return.

Soldier: General Qi.

Sariel: Your leg's alright now? You shouldn't drink before it's completely healed.

Soldier: The general healed me, it has to be alright.

Sariel: That wine cup next to you…

Soldier: It’s my brother’s. If I don’t pour him some, he'll cause trouble in the afterlife.

Sariel: I see. I'll have a drink with you all.

Soldier: Haha, he’ll be overjoyed.

Young Soldier: G-General Qi.

Sariel: What is it?

Young Soldier: I... this is my first battle. I... I want to ask the supply officer to take a letter back to my mother.

Young Soldier: But I... I can't write, and I can’t find Vice-General Chen Yang...

Sariel: Don't speak so timidly.

Sariel: Go get a piece of bamboo.

Sariel: What do you want to write?

Young Soldier: I want to tell my mother that we won the battle, and we won’t be home for a while, but I'm safe.

Young Soldier: General, your handwriting is beautiful, even if I don’t recognize the characters.

Sariel: Didn’t your mother teach you?

Young Soldier: She doesn’t know how either. But if we send the letter, she’ll ask someone to read it to her.

Sariel: In that case, why not draw pictures of what you want to say? That way, she can look at them anytime.

Young Soldier: That... that's a city gate, and there’s a person on the tower, holding a flag...

Young Soldier: I get it! It’s the scene when we captured the city yesterday.

Sariel: What’s your name?

Young Soldier: I’m Ding Yi.

Sariel: Easy to write and remember. I’ll mark this person with your name, so your mother will know you were victorious.

Young Soldier: A horse, carrying a person, who looks like me... That means I’m on my way home!

Young Soldier: I see the city gates of the capital, General, you drew them so well!

Sariel: What kind of clothes does your mother like to wear?

Young Soldier: Just plain hemp. But she likes to put a flower behind her head.

Sariel: I see.

Young Soldier: This is me and my mother standing at the door...

Young Soldier: Just like this... When I used to come home late after playing outside, she would wipe the dust off my face like this...

Sariel: Why are you crying?

Young Soldier: I miss home... I miss my mother... I want to eat millet dumplings... I want to go to Chen Da-ge’s wedding…

Young Soldier: But Chen Da-ge... Chen Da-ge won't be coming back…

Sariel: Did you see him die?

Young Soldier: No, the house caught fire that day, and Chen Da-ge told me to go first. I haven’t seen him since.

Sariel: Then why do you say he won't be coming back?

Young Soldier: Everyone says he's probably dead... They might not even find his body...

Sariel: Ding Yi, do you want to make a bet?

Young Soldier: Bet...

Sariel: Your Chen Da-ge, and everyone else who isn't here, will all come back.

Young Soldier: I-I'll bet! But General, what do I wager?

Sariel: The wager... If I win, you’ll eat a few more millet dumplings when you get home.

Chen Yang: Sariel.

Sariel: Tian Gui was right for once, you were at the river. There's a feast in the camp tonight, you should come.

Chen Yang: I... where are you going on horseback?

Sariel: To find those who haven't returned.

Chen Yang: Some of them probably died outside the ridge... Some were captured by the defeated soldiers of Lu City...

Chen Yang: And some were likely taken as forced labor by the enemy after that night, and we don't know where they are now. How are you going to find them?

Sariel: I'll search every place you mentioned.

Chen Yang: What if you can't find them—

Sariel: I will find them. They have families waiting for them, or red threads of fate tying them back. They have to return.

Chen Yang: If only I were as certain as you.

Sariel: What’s the difference? You’ve kept your promise too. Chen Yang.

Chen Yang: What promise...

Sariel: To advance and retreat together, to share joys and sorrows. Everyone knows you don't like killing.

Chen Yang: That was a long time ago.

Sariel: I still remember, and I’m sure Tian Gui does too.

Chen Yang: I’ll get the horse, I'll go with you.

Sariel: You stay, we need someone to arrange camp guards.

Chen Yang: …Alright.

Sariel: And there’s a bunch of people waiting for you to help them write letters home, it’s noisy there now.

Sariel: Giddyup!

Three months of heavy snow, and people eat each other.

In the northern wilderness, a saying goes: "One day of snow, the dogs laugh; one month of snow, frostbite cries; three months of snow, no millet remains; five months of snow, the city is empty."

When the royal army stepped onto this land, they brought the saying back to the capital. Tian Gui heard it and asked me if the snow in Kunlun was greater than that in the northern territories. I told him that it never stopped snowing in Kunlun. He broke off a piece of sweet potato he'd snuck from the warehouse and handed it to me, saying it was lucky it hadn't starved our General Qi to death there.

I've forgotten if I told him then that no one starves in Kunlun. It’s a perilous terrain that strikes fear into living things, completely uninhabited, unlike the twelve cities of the north, which have a brief spring and where the Emperor uses barren soil to feed hundreds of thousands of people.

On the forty-second day of Yongzhou's siege, I stood on the city wall, watching the enemy's iron armor. A hundred times our forces, severed supply lines, threats of massacre, years of war—they had learned how to trap me, how to force me to look after both ends at once.

Flying snow landed on the endless armor, melting with the heat from the gaps, only thick white accumulating underfoot. In a letter my mother sent long ago, she said she'd found a kitten with fur like "black clouds treading on snow." I was thousands of miles from home, yet I saw its likeness here.

When we first arrived in the north, the soldiers often gathered, talking of family and homeland. I rarely joined them. They asked more than once, "General Qi, don't you miss home?" Now, I could almost answer that question, but there was no one left to hear.

It was the forty-second day of Yongzhou's siege and the fifteenth day since the granary ran out. Everyone thought only of survival. I used my gift to force every edible plant to grow until their life force was spent and they withered completely, but it was still not enough, far from enough.

The people and soldiers devoured a fine, dust-like soil. I grabbed one of them, stuffed rotten leaves into his mouth, and forced him to vomit.

I told the others to do the same, or they'd die quickly. Most listened, but some didn't. Those who died wore smiles of satiation.

The enemy attacked again and again, and each time we repelled them, more were wounded than before. I couldn't heal them; my spiritual energy could no longer draw sustenance in their bodies.

In a grass hut, a young soldier couldn’t open his eyes. He grasped my spear tassel, calling "General," saying he wanted to see his hometown one last time. I recognized him. He was Ding Yi, who loved millet dumplings and had a flower-loving mother.

I described to him the winter in the capital, the icicles hanging from the eaves, the sugared water by the door that would stick to your tongue, the plum blossoms by the wall, the millet vendor’s bell, and the hooves of returning soldiers, striking the stone pavement, echoing through the city.

Listening, he smiled, saying he was a spirit race, did I know? I had known from the start. His spiritual power was weak, almost human, but he was still a spirit.

He choked, his face purple, pleading, saying he hadn't told anyone, people wouldn’t eat people, but deer, deer were edible. That breath left him, and he died. On the grass mat, there was no human form, only a skeletal deer.

That night, long-unused cooking utensils were scrubbed clean, the wounded and whole sat by the hearth, holding earthen bowls. They thought it was a dead beast buried in a snowdrift, a blessing from heaven.

A soldier brought me soup, his steps unsteady, barely holding the bowl. I ordered him to drink it himself. He drank, bit on something hard, and spat out a boiled, rotten wooden tag.

He looked around, saying there seemed to be the character "one" on it and reminded him that little Ding Yi was still lying inside and that he should bring some to him. I said, “No need.” After Ding Yi, more people in the city died. Their bodies were neither buried nor burned, and did not pile up, as white smoke rose from the windows of several grass huts.

I remembered that the northern saying had been altered when it reached the royal city. Ding Yi had been deceived. The original sentence was: “Three months of heavy snow, and people eat each other.” The wooden tag with the character “one” was hung in the center of the training field, and when the flags swayed, it slapped the flagpole like hooves on cobblestones.

Gradually, more things were hung there—red ropes, broken armor, lucky knots, and embroidered shoes. The flags were weighed down and could no longer fly. A bald eagle landed, but didn't look down. Everyone here had become eagles, leaving nothing for it.

During those days, I developed a cough, or perhaps it was vomiting, but since my stomach was empty, it seemed like coughing.

A few days later, the second spirit race died. He was my father’s former deputy, who had taught me human language in Kunlun. He was eaten alive by humans.

My officers and I found the dying embers in the city’s darkest corner, bones scattered everywhere, and a broken antelope horn. Following the scent, I found the man. He was writhing on the ground, a large, strong antelope, he had eaten it whole, rupturing his stomach.

He recognized me, begging me to save him. I asked why he had eaten my soldier. He wept, saying he was starving and thought it was an ordinary sheep. I asked if the antelope hadn’t told him who he was.

The man groaned, saying the sheep had just bleated, he knew nothing. I told him he was lying, my spirit soldiers had been with humans too long, they had forgotten the differences, unable to speak in animal tongues. He couldn't hear me, rolling, crying, cursing, shouting the sheep was going to die anyway.

He spoke the truth. The antelope was going to die, and he soon would too. I had only lived longer. The people I led my soldiers to protect were his killers. The city won through countless sacrifices was where people died like insects. Would more die if this city belonged to the enemy outside?

That night, in my memory, I rode a swift horse, breaking out of the city through the side gate. I didn't know whom to protect, or what to fight for. When I reached the nameless barren mountain outside Yongzhou, the two-month snow finally stopped, the vast ground blinding in its brilliance.

The enemy soldiers watched me. Their blades were meant for slaughter, but they had been outside too long, their fingers frozen to the hilts, tearing off skin when separated. Many had frozen legs, falling in the snow with each step, likely to freeze to death if left alone.

The people inside the city watched me too. They saw fruits and wild grass outside. They didn’t see the more fertile lands, warmer waters, and richer cities to the south. If there was no city, could everyone go anywhere freely?

Yet, that same night, reinforcements from the capital finally arrived, silently approaching from behind, and a chaotic battle began. An enemy soldier charged me. I didn't know if he had the same thoughts as me, and I only raised my spear to meet him. I won, he lost, nothing different from before.

3098 Years Ago. Spring.

Humans cannot feel victory through defeat, but they can feel life through death.

That spring, the Emperor personally inscribed a divination, asking the deities if he should expand southward. While waiting for the diviner to light the fire, he asked me what kind of answer I expected. I told him it would surely be negative. The Emperor laughed, asking how General Qi knew the deities’ intentions.

I didn't need to know the deities’ intentions, only to look at him. He was old, unable to hold his customary copper chopsticks steadily. If the far south could not be conquered, he might die. Why undertake something he was destined not to witness?

I heard the firewood crackling on the altar behind the Emperor and the diviner’s knife carefully scraping the animal bones, crafting markings according to the Emperor's wishes, indicating divine disapproval—a stark contrast to what he had done before numerous previous campaigns.

And so it was. The Emperor recalled his armies, sending messages to the tribes that had submitted. He would hold the grandest ritual to heaven in history. My sister and I stood before the palace, watching skilled artisans inscribe characters onto bronze tripods. During the ceremony, the Emperor would unveil the silk covering the tripods, displaying the achievements and glories of the inscriptions. But Chen Yang, Tian Gui, and Ding Yi were not among them.

Reading military texts, my mother told me that human lives were too short, so they used writing and pictures to replace memories, creating something called history. Yet, it still seemed unreliable, a few hundred words summarizing a century, like a poorly made sieve, letting pass what should have been kept, and keeping what should have been lost.

But it didn’t matter. I would always remember them, even witness their lives. As long as someone witnessed them, they could become history.

I seemed to have spoken aloud, and my sister turned to smile at me. She said that what was inscribed there would become the glory of generations, different from what I remembered. I didn't see any difference. Was what the Emperor ordered to be recorded nobler than others' memories?

My sister looked at me for a long time, saying I hadn’t changed at all. As she spoke and smiled, the fine lines at the corners of her mouth moved. Spirit races’ appearances changed with time, but not so noticeably. It was only that the humans around them aged, so they had to make some adjustments, to prevent feelings of injustice.

Such as her using spiritual energy to change her appearance, or me wearing a mask since a certain year. Perhaps when she said “unchanged,” she meant my appearance, or perhaps not.

Leaving the palace, I met Chen Yang. One of his eyes was damaged by an arrow. I recognized him only when he came close. He held a trembling wine jug, saying he had just returned from drinking with Tian Gui, and saw a forsythia in full bloom, assuming I had visited there recently.

Tian Gui died on the battlefield. A few years after the battle of Lu City, the Emperor ordered him to lead troops independently. Each time he achieved military merit, he used the reward money to buy fine wine for the three of us.

The flames and blood of the battlefield sounded exhilarating from his lips. He had suffered many fatal wounds, and when he recovered, he drank even more heartily, saying that this was living. That was the first time I understood the difference between victory and defeat, life and death. Humans could not feel victory through defeat, but they could feel life through death.

Chen Yang and I exchanged few words. Soon, he could barely stand. A young man, who resembled him, ran to take him home. Chen Yang asked if I could take off my mask for a moment. I hesitated, but complied. He stared at me for a long time. At first, I didn't understand what he was looking at, or what he wanted to see.

Then, a light appeared in his cloudy eyes, his trembling hands steadied, and a gust of wind blew, rustling the grass. I realized he saw the camp’s ever-burning bonfire, the wine bowls emptied and refilled under the moon, and the figure galloping on the hills. He saw his own past on my face.

As he left, he pulled the young man beside him, telling me it was his son, who had loved swords and staves since childhood, and would soon enlist. The young man seemed displeased, saying he should have gone years ago, now that the war was over.

Chen Yang replied that was precisely why he should go, or his mother would never let him. They walked away, talking. I put my mask back on.

That was the last time I saw Chen Yang. He died peacefully, believing the war was over. He didn't know that ten days later, at the ceremony, an envoy from the western tribes brought a fine bronze sword. The Emperor was delighted, allowing him to present it.

At the last step, the envoy drew the sword, rushing towards the Emperor on the throne. The guards cut off his head, blood flowing down the high steps. The Emperor was uninjured, but shocked, and fell ill. A new Emperor sat on the same high steps, inscribing a bone plate. Before him were countless young soldiers, waiting for heaven’s answer.

I didn't listen, nor did I need to. I sat on the city wall, looking west. At the foot of the vast mountains, new settlements had sprung up. A new city was built, its walls seemingly expanding, one day reaching the royal capital.

The young soldiers would see the victories inscribed on the bronze tripods, but they wouldn’t have seen the fires of Lu City or the snow of Yongzhou. They would, like Chen Yang and Tian Gui once did, make youthful vows, step onto the battlefield, and years later, leave with broken bodies or be buried with rusted swords. They too would believe the war had ended.

They were not wrong. Their war would end. They would leave the war, or the war would leave them. There was no difference. And I would repeat this cycle until the name of war, and everything similar, no longer existed in humans’ short memories. Then, my war would cease.

PHONE CALL

Note: Jokes in this phone call are based off Chinese homophones, so it will not make sense in English!

Sariel: Off work?

You: On my way home, did you get the picture I sent you?

Sariel: Yes, I did. What is this? A children’s educational quiz?

You: It’s an entertainment event at work… if you answer the daily corny joke correctly, you get a small gift!

Sariel: Didn't you used to work overtime every day at the office? How come you’re so free now?

You: Actually, sometimes I worked purposely slow to keep you company while you worked late…

Sariel: It seems I shouldn’t have reduced your workload.

You: Occasionally! I said occasionally!

You: Besides, participating in entertainment activities helps improve efficiency—it’s a proven fact.

Sariel: ……Of course, from the expert in kindergarten games.

You: But the expert is facing a challenge now and needs emergency help from the sidelines!

You: Teacher Qi wouldn’t have the heart to refuse my little request, would you?

Sariel: Alright, let me see the questions first.

Sariel: "How much money should you take with you when it rains?"

You: Isn't it hard? Is the answer the cost of an umbrella?

Sariel: For someone who often forgets to bring an umbrella, that would be the correct answer.

Sariel: Fill in the blank with thirty million.

You: How did you get that right away? Why thirty million?

Sariel: Because "When it rains, if you don't bring an umbrella,千万别出门 (qiān wàn bié chū mén)" which sounds similar to "千万 (qiān wàn)" which means ten million. You add the 三 (three) and it creates Thirty Million.

You: Oh, it’s a pun!

You: Submitting the answer… Teacher Qi, there’s another question!

Sariel: “What animal can provide voice navigation”…. Are you doing this on purpose?

You: Of course not! Ah! Is the answer...

Sariel: A fox.

You: Why?

You: Just so you know, I really don’t know. I’m not pretending. I swear on the mung bean cake you made for me last week.

Sariel: Nonsense. (胡hú 说huō 八bā 道dào)

You: I’m not! Teacher Qi, you have to believe me, or I’ll cry right now!

Sariel: Idiot… I’m talking about the question.

You: Huh? Oh, I get it! Because the “fox (狐hú)” “says (说shuō)” “eight (八bā)” “roads (道dào)”! So, it’s voice navigation!

You: You’re amazing!

Sariel: Just a coincidence.

You: No need to be modest. Maybe you’re really good at these corny jokes!

Sariel: Do you think everyone is like you, taking pride in this kind of thing?

Sariel: I think I’ve been spending too much time with you; that’s why I have these strange inspirations.

You: Then why can’t I think of them...

You: I know, this is called complementarity, right?

Sariel: Complementarity?

You: Yeah, I’ve learned a lot of design-related knowledge and skills from you!

You: Correspondingly, you’ve also absorbed the skills of corny jokes from me.

Sariel: So, should I thank you, and call you teacher?

You: I can still tell when you’re being sarcastic!

You: But it seems you’ve been quite successful in absorbing skills from me, while I haven’t fully digested the ones from you…

Sariel: Maybe if you didn’t focus on this kindergarten-level stuff, you could digest a little more.

You: You seem to be enjoying it too…

Sariel: What did you say?

You: Nothing, nothing. I said, Teacher Qi, I’ll study hard!

Sariel: That’s good to know. This weekend, same time as usual. You can also bring your drafts to the studio to revise.

TEXT MESSAGE

Sariel: Your hair tie fell into my car. You: No, it's your hair tie~ Sariel: .......... Sariel: What's this new trick? You: No trick, I'm telling the truth. When I was out shopping, I saw this strawberry hair tie and it caught my eye, so I bought it for you. Sariel: If it caught your eye, why give it to me? Sariel: I put it in the glove compartment, as a spare for someone who's always forgetting things. You: Actually, this is a popular internet thing lately. If a guy wears his girlfriend's hair tie on his wrist, it proves he's "taken!" Sariel: You… never mind. Sariel: You can just say what you're thinking next time. You: Then let's go to the mall this weekend to pick out a pair! Sariel (Voice MSG): Going to the mall specifically to buy matching hair ties does sound like something you'd do. Sariel (Voice MSG): Since we're going out anyway, we might as well stop by that restaurant you've been pestering me about.

TIMELINE POST

Sariel: Getting to sleep early is more effective than any skincare product.

You: I’ll definitely go to bed early tomorrow!

Sariel: Isn’t your “tomorrow” already scheduled out for the next month?

S2 Chapter 1-01

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