#like ro is gone bc he doesnt have the time for the server and its conflicts

[mcytegg]

i miss s5 utopias so bad bro. like i will never Not think abt how planet was the only person in lalas to provide hearts to help revive ro & who was there to greet her when she came back. or how it was her and planet specifically that got berated by ash on multiple occasions for their attachment to their ex teammates (bacon and mapicc) bc it was seen as dumb and a weakness. or how it was just the two of them and minute who originally founded the foundation and started up the team created to stop the abyss. and and and how irritated planet got when arguing w jumper, minute, and ash on ro's behalf when they were all but directly calling her a traitor bc he thought they were being way too critical of ro bc for all that she'd made her love for mapicc clear— she was still loyal and by THEIR side (by PLANET'S side) up until that point in the season, as it was approaching the end. (ignore that ro had already betrayed the foundation and likely made the decision to leave lalas only earlier that same day 🥹)

[mcytegg]

i was gonna sleep but no i cant stop agonizing over how jumper's deep attachment and loyalty to her teammates makes complete sense when you consider everything she did and experienced in s5— especially in regards to vitalasy and the abyss. and how her wanting to be completely uninvolved in the conflicts of the server this season is also connected to this.

bc like okay so jumper is obviously incredibly attached to ro and rek. she has made it abundantly clear that they are her priority. they are the only people who matter to her at the end of the day; the people she will do anything for on the server. there is nobody in the server she would choose over them. no matter what rek does in his own time, or how inactive ro is, jumper ALWAYS considers both of them and has them in mind w everything she does.

which i find interesting bc at this point, rek almost exclusively refers to jumper and her alone as his teammate when his team is brought up simply bc ro is never here. they havent seen each other in months and i can count the amt of times rek and ro have been on the server together on one hand, so obviously rek doesnt seem to feel that same attachment to ro that jumper does.

which is very understandable but very interesting in how it contrasts to the way jumper seems to almost cling to that day 1 team up she had w ro. how she continues to include him in everything, and does her best to ensure he will be well taken care of should he choose to login at any point while shes offline.

and i...cannot help but feel that a very big part of jumpers fierce loyalty is her experience w vi. of him being gone. of her choice to not be alone, while he was gone. and her losing him in the end. like ro's absence almost feels like salt in the wound, but it also feels like its her getting a second chance to choose the other option— to wait for ro, to be loyal to him and rek, and to choose them and to continue to choose them no matter what happens.

which brings me to jumper's refusal to involve herself in conflict unless she NEEDS to be involved. i think her refusal to be loyal to anyone except ro and rek ties into this, actually!!! although part of her neutrality may be self interest, i dont actually agree w derap in saying its entirely out of pure selfishness. bc i actually think a large part of it is jumper continuing to choose ro and rek, and refusing to even consider putting herself into a position where she could ever be prioritizing anyone who isnt them. ally or enemy alike.

bc like yes. she is allies w minute. she considers (considered? idk anymore since chief tried to kill her LOL) the empire her allies, and once expressed that she would happily help them kill people and assist them w their schemes when it is requested of her, but i feel like that is as far as she is willing to toe the line of involving herself in conflict and any sort of loyalty to anyone who isnt her team bc shes already played that game before.

rek is always doing his own thing and ro is IA, but this time around jumper isnt looking for anyone else, another connection, or anybody to fight w. shes building a base for her team, supporting reks projects even if she doesnt understand, and she is waiting for ro. there was nothing she couldve done to ever not lose vi; he was always going to part ways w her no matter what decision she made, but she was never able to fully heal or come to terms w losing him in the way she did and mourn all of the time they never had so this time she is making the decision to hold onto rek and ro as tightly as she can, and to cherish every moment she is able to have them as long as she can in the hopes that she will never have to lose them like she lost vi. that she can have the memories w them that she was never able to have w vi.