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x-loveletters-xox · 6 years ago

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Let it Snow Part 2

@ofbitchinisms @rivcrsrundeep @bxilmeout @niighttmares

December, Willow, Fletcher & Natalie

Natalie: Her brows raised as she watched the boys kiss and there was no stopping the smile coming to her lips. The game was getting pretty interesting now, but she was enjoying it. She let out a laugh as Willow downed the cup and she gave him an impressed glance. "Impressive." Leaning back into the couch, she smiled. "Dare."

Willow: “Do a body shot from Dee or fletcher, whoever’s more comfortable with it.” He added, not offering himself because he didn’t want to get sticky.

Natalie: Her eyes widened slightly at the dare and she looked between the two. "So... which one of you are more comfortable with it? Because either way I drink."

Fletcher: "Use my body, that's fine," Fletcher said, jokingly flopping himself to the floor. "Unless for some reason you'd prefer Dee's over mine but if you don't then you can go ahead and use me." There was little he wouldn't be down to do.

December-: December chuckled at the dare. “Fletcher seems like he really wants this so go for it.” December laughed watching

Natalie: "I mean, if you insist," Nat laughed as he went to the floor and reached over for the bottle of wine. As she opened it back up, she went down to the floor and rested on her knees on the side of him, lifting his shirt. She poured a small amount into his navel before putting the bottle to the side and leaned down, doing the shot. "Have fun?" She asked with a tiny grin before giggling and looking up at December. "Truth or dare?"

Fletcher: "I always have fun but yes, that was very enjoyable." Fletcher said and laughed, deciding to stay on the floor and just lean up with his elbows. He wtched as she moved back and then looked over at Dee to see what she would decide after the last time

December-: December was impressed by how crazy the night was slowly getting. It was cool she had never had a night like that before. “I’ll go with truth this time.” December spoke figuring it had been awhile since she had picked truth

Natalie: "Describe the most attractive thing about each person in this room," Natalie spoke as she moved back a little so she was able to lean against the table.

December-: “I feel like that is more of a dare.” December chucked. “But okay.” She looked at Fletcher with a smile. “I think the most attractive thing about you is your smile, you have this really soft smile that lights up your whole face.” She explained then turned to Willow. “Your eyes, you have this way of looking at people that feels like your looking into the soul and I’ve noticed it before passing in the hallways and have always thought that it was pretty hot.” She explained, and then turned to Natalie. “The most attractive thing about you is your heart. I think you just genuinely care about people. Yes it’s cheesy but it’s true.” December never really thought before she spoke she wasn’t sure if any of those things were too far for her to say but they were things she genuinely felt

Natalie: "I mean...yeah, kinda. You're right. But it's a cute kinda truthy, dare," She pointed out. Natalie relaxed into a more comfortable sitting position, knees going to her chest, as December began to list things off. Her gaze flickered to each boy as the other described the most attractive thing and a small smile hinted at her lips when December got to her. "That was really sweet, Dee." She paused before actually smiling. "And cute."

Fletcher: Fletcher just smiled genuinely as she rattled off the things about everyone and he nodded in response to Natalie's statement. "It was really sweet. Thanks. That meant a lot more than you probably thought it did."

Willow: Willow blushed deeply at the compliment, staying silent and just trying to give a nod of thanks in return. He never realized he might be noticed for more than just being the weird kid and a target for bullies.

December-: December smiled at the seemly all positive response to her truth. She was just saying how she truly felt. “Just saying the truth.” She spoke with a smile. “Okay uh Fletcher. Truth or dare?”

Fletcher: "Um...." he paused for a minute to really think. Dares were fun but would that be annoying if he picked dare for the third time in a row? "Truth, I guess." he said and smiled a little, leaning back up on his elbows

December-: December thought about it for a moment. “Hhm. Describe your type.” She spoke wondering what kind of person Fletcher liked.

Fletcher: "I don't..." Fletcher thought about for a moment before shaking his head again. "I don't have a type, really. I just like good people. People who want to do good and want to put good into the world. that's what attracts me the most."

December-: “People who wants to do good is a good type.” December spoke with a smile.

Fletcher: Fletcher nodded and shrugged. "nothing simpler than that though." he admitted before turning to natalie. "truth or dare?" he asked curiously, seeing what she would say

Natalie: Truthfully, Natalie was comfortable in the spot she was in and didn't feel like moving any time soon so she decided against dare. "Truth."

Fletcher: "what made you do theater?" it was always interesting to see where people's passions laid and to see how they started. It told a lot about a person

Natalie: "My mom. When my dad left when I was younger it took a toll on me, I guess. So, she tried getting me into sports; soccer didn't work out. I hit myself in the face with a basketball and forget softball. So, I think she found a little theater club for kids and once she put me in it that was the end of that," she smiled fondly at the memories of her first joining theater. "My first role was a caroler in A Christmas Carol and I did fucking awful, but my mom was so proud of me." Her voice trailed off and she then cleared her throat. "But, uh, yeah. That's what made me do theater."

Fletcher: "That sounds really cool. Must be nice to have a supportive parent like that." Fletcher said and smiled before clearing his throat. "anyways your turn to ask." he said and laid back down to stare up at the ceiling as he waited to hear who was next

Natalie: "I'd be a mess without her." Nat admitted softly before looking to Willow. "Truth or dare, Willow?"

December-: December listened to her explanation, she didn’t know that her dad had left. “That’s cool that you were able to find a passion in it.” She spoke.

Willow: Hearing Natalie’s story was bittersweet but even if they had just met, he was happy for her that she had something that she had passion for. He also took note of Fletcher’s comment, theorizing that the boy’s sunny personality might be hiding a lot more than he let anyone at school see. “I feel the same about my mom —and I pick Truth,” he answered to go with the flow of the game.

Eventually, the gang fell asleep on the couch. The next morning the teacher rescued them from the cabin, and they all spent the rest of the trip hanging out.

#Let it snow #xDee

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pro-bee · 8 years ago

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- We've lost agents before, haven't we? And when we do, it's all hands on deck! - She's more than an agent to you. - She was a daughter to you. She was a sister to McGee and Abby, and— she was no more to me than anybody.

Oh my heart.

THIS ENTIRE SCENE.

As I said earlier, this is the scene of Michael Weatherly’s career, but let’s not jump ahead of ourselves just yet, because settle in boys and girls, this is going to be a bumpy ride.

The raw emotion spilling out of Tony is so incredibly painful to witness, because it’s one of the rare instances of pure, unadulterated grief anyone on this show is ever allowed to experience.

Everyone on this show is usually so controlled -- particularly Tony -- and to see him lose it, emotionally and physically -- is definitely jarring, but I suppose that’s exactly the point, because Tony has finally reached his breaking point.

We’ve never seen him like this before-- not after Kate, or Paula, or Jenny, or even Jeanne-- all of whom’s deaths or departures were sudden and traumatic and personally meaningful to him. But again, there’s a purpose to it, because Ziva, as Gibbs points out, isn’t like any of them, especially not to him.

But let’s back up.

I have many favorite parts of this scene (if you can call “getting my heart ripped out” a favorite thing), but it starts off early.

- What are you doing here? - What am I doing? What are you doing?! What are we doing? Is anybody here?!

Oh, DiNozzo.

This gets to me right away, not just because of Tony’s meltdown, but because of Gibbs’ immediate understanding of what is happening.

I can’t really explain why, but Mark Harmon’s delivery of that line gets to me and kind of spells everything out. Because yes, he initially sounds brusque, but it’s because he recognizes exactly what Tony is doing and going through, and it’s more like, “Work is the last place you should be right now because it’s not going to be pretty and we both know it.” Like, it’s so paternal (and dare I say even slightly tender) and sadly Gibbs is speaking from experience here, because he’s been there and he knows this is just the tip of the iceberg.

And he’s right.

(More under the cut because this is going to be looooooooooooong)

[[more]]

- What do we know? What are the facts? 'Cause we don't assume, we verify. Do we know she's dead? 'Cause if we know she's dead, we're gonna get him. - Yeah, she's dead, and we will get Kort. Us. Not you. - Oh, yes, me! We've lost agents before, haven't we? And when we do, it's all hands on deck! - She's more than an agent to you. - She was a daughter to you. She was a sister to McGee and Abby, and— she was no more to me than anybody.

So Tony goes back into denial-- because he isn’t ready to face what this means and what he’s lost, so he tries to pretend that this isn’t real, that what they had wasn’t real, that he can handle this the same way he handled everyone else’s deaths. Which means they take action and seek justice and vengeance but meanwhile don’t think about what the loss really means to them.

Because he knows he won’t make it.

It’s really powerful watching him lose control -- banging on the desk, yelling, lashing out at anyone who crashes his path because nothing is enough -- and as I mentioned is uncharacteristic of both Tony and the show, but if ever there were a reason, this would be it.

Especially because you can see that he still doesn’t quite believe it. It’s why he has to ask Gibbs if he’s sure Ziva is dead, even though Abby and McGee would never (knowingly) steer him wrong, and he must know that Gibbs won’t tell him anything different. But at the same time, he also knows that Gibbs’ word is basically gospel in their world, and he’s the last word on what’s real. So he wants Gibbs to reassure him-- but he’s also searching for a way out, for a way this isn’t real and that there’s a possibility she’s still alive, like the last time this happened. Good call btw.

But again, you can see Gibbs looking out for him, even if he has to be harsh. “Us, not you.” This is for so many reasons. Firstly, because Tony is too directly involved and it would be wrong on so many levels for him to be involved in this, professionally and personally. I mean, let’s be real, it’s wrong for any of them to be on this case which is true for like 90% of this show, but in this instance in particular, Tony would only bring on a world of hurt.

Because as Gibbs points out, Ziva was never just anything to Tony, and especially not in the last few years. Gibbs knows what Ziva and Tony were to each other -- and is the only person Tony’s ever really discussed it with even tangentially -- and it’s important that he bring Tony back down to earth and remind him of that fact. That the grief he’s going through is a whole other kind of world of hurt, one that they share in a manner of speaking.

Tony is right, that Ziva was more than a co-worker to all of them, and I like that he points that out, particularly to Gibbs, because the show has emphasized over the years how close Ziva and Gibbs were, from the second she pulled that trigger against Ari to save his life, and eventually even confessed to him that he was the closest thing to a father she’d had in the later years she was on the team. So yeah, Gibbs’ reaction (or lack thereof) is curious, but I think the fact that Tony points it out is deliberate by the writers -- and I’m pretending it’s because once Gibbs realized Ziva had died (”died”), as painful as it was, he knew he had to keep it together to for all of the team’s sake, but especially for Tony’s. Because Gibbs has been there, and spiraled out of control himself, so he’s being for Tony what he didn’t have when Shannon and Kelly were killed.

(As an aside, not equating losing your wife and daughter with losing your on-again-off-again-whatever-the-hell-thing Ziva was to Tony, but it’s closer to that end of the spectrum to what the others would feel.)

So what they need right now isn’t a father or friend, it’s a leader, and he’s stepping up to the plate so that they can all do what needs to be done for Ziva’s sake. Let Tony grieve, and the rest of them will deal with the justice for both of them until it’s time for all of them to process this.

But let’s get back to Tony.

And Senior showing up just in time to bring home that this is not normal.

Because if there’s anything more irritating than having your surrogate father try to do what’s best for you when you’re tailspinning, it’s having your actual father join forces with him to do the same.

- She was no more to me than anybody. - Well, that's not true. - Yes it is! And why are you following me? - Come back home, Junior. - No! I can't. - You need time. - I need to know what happened. - You need to breathe. - I'll breathe when Trent Kort is dead.

Oh, man.

This is when everything begins crashing down.

And you can see it all over Tony’s face.

The “I can’t” just hits me right in the feels.

Because that’s the moment he breaks. And so do we along with him.

It’s the reason why he isn’t home right now: he can’t be there, because being home means facing up to the truth (or truthiness), and that’s the last thing he wants to do right now.

So when Senior asks him to come home, it’s not just because he wants to be at work to go after who did this, but it’s because he can’t handle being home, where everything will remind him of her, and what happened, and he can’t handle it.

Because he couldn’t live without her then, and he really, really can’t now.

And it’s just the way it’s delivered: how he chokes on the words, how he can’t stop the tears coming now, how his face just crumples when his father and his mentor both stress that yes, this is happening, and he has to deal.

It’s just an interesting reversal, because most of the time on this show, the characters really aren’t allowed to process, anything. After every blow to the team, it’s gear up and time to go after the bad guys. Being allowed the luxury of breathing is one they are rarely afforded, and maybe with good reason. Which is why he pivots onto focusing back on getting Kort, even if he is in no shape, physical or emotional, to actually go through with it. Somewhere deep down he knows it, and Senior and Gibbs definitely do, because again, they’ve both been there in their own way losing their own loves of their lives.

- But not like this. Just for tonight, get your bearings, son. - Listen to him. He's right. Go. Or go for good. - What?! - I’m not asking. We got this.

Again, I like this, even though it’s incredibly painful. For one of the few times on the show, a character is allowed to be fully human, and absorb the impact of such a loss. (I understand why they have to go at a breakneck speed on TV, but it’s comforting, in a terrible way, for Tony to be able to be a man, for once, and not an agent. I suppose that was the whole point of the last year or two, but that is a whole other post.)

So yes, the last thing Tony probably wants is to be stuck alone in his apartment with his father and his thoughts and replaying his what ifs over and over again until he goes crazy. But by the same token, he’d probably do the same at work, too, to much more disastrous results all around. So I like that Gibbs and Senior are working in tandem, here, to look out for Tony the man, not Tony the Agent.

Obviously, Gibbs threatening to fire him is extreme, but we all know he’d never follow through with it, right? How many times has he played that card over the years? (How many times has he played it himself?!) But even if it momentarily angers Tony, it does the trick -- to snap him out of his meltdown long enough to see reason and go home. To get Tony to trust in his team, who has always had his back, who always had Ziva’s, to reassure him that they will get this done. They are as invested in this as he is, and he has to know deep down that they will give everything they have to find Kort, as if he were there with them.

So Tony can nurse his broken heart and broken spirit enough for all of them, and they will take care of justice for Ziva and for Tony and all of them, and for what was taken.

I’m no good at writing endings to anything, but the short version of all of this is that this is a tour de force by all of the actors, but not surprisingly, most notably Michael Weatherly. I think Tony runs through about five different stages of grief in two minutes, and he’s allowed to play every one of them all over his face. In some ways, it even makes me wish we’d gotten to see even more of these acting chops over the years, because he really shines with the material. Again, it comes at the expense of all of our hearts because it really shouldn’t have necessitated killing off a beloved character, but I guess we’re not allowed to have nice things, ever.

On the other hand, I love how Senior and Gibbs take care of Tony in their own way, from Senior’s more traditional fatherly approach, to Gibbs taking the practical route in order to make sure they do what they all need to do, but is no less important or ultimately comforting.

There’s just so much happening in so little time, often going unsaid -- everyone acknowledging the impact of Tiva, and by the same token Ziva’s death, Tony realizing this is actually happening and how little he’d moved on from it in the first place, Gibbs trying to take care of his NCIS family the only way he knows how, and Senior fully embracing his role in this time, perhaps in a way he wasn’t able to for Tony when his own wife died decades earlier. There’s a whole lot of subtext happening behind the amazing acting at the forefront.

Also, in case it bears repeating, #zivaisnotdead2017

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