#like. bro you cant even commit to finishing a side project let alone a dissertation lmao
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girl help i'm romanticizing academia and doing research again
#kcat talks#[through gritted teeth] i do not have the mental fortitude to do a phd. i will burn out with the slightest roadblock.#[fighting back tears] i will never know everything there is to know about multiple different academic fields pertaining to my interests...#being an expert in one is unrealistic enough let alone everything you think is cool...#but part of my brain is like. oooo you want to know every neuron in the body personally and solve the hard problem of consciousness and#make cool technology and be a memorable name in your field soooooo bad#like. bro you cant even commit to finishing a side project let alone a dissertation lmao#sighhhhh. at least i can be a dr in my daydreams#(or night dreams considering i had a dream about going back to school last night lol)#or maybe at least try to finish a side project relating to my interests instead. theres a dream research coding scale i could do something w#oh yeah i was also thinking of applying for a sleep or lucid dream study but idk if i could sleep in the lab well enough lol#can you tell im rambling instead of doing work again
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