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oveliagirlhaditright · 5 years ago

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A Dark Angel AU, where it was actually Ben who died at the beginning of Pollo Loco, and Max agrees to having dinner with Logan to try and cheer up.

The Arms of Someone You Love

“Max… why don’t you come over and I’ll cook you dinner?" Logan asked Max over the phone, as he tried to cheer her up about Ben’s death. And, despite herself, it made Max's lips turn up the tiniest bit, even amidst her grief.

What was it that Logan had once told her? That in this short, brutal life, one needed to take every opportunity they could find to celebrate?

Well, that certainly sounded like a good idea to Max right now. She’d never been good with all of the sad feelings she should have been feeling, anyway. So she whispered somewhat brokenly into the receiver, "See you in an hour then, Meal Ticket." And as awful as it was, Max only somewhat regretted those last words. But she had had to say them, hadn’t she? Or risk breaking the careful illusion that she and Logan had meticulously created for their relationship.

...

Logan ended up making orange beef for Max... which was something she’d never even heard of before, since cows were especially hard to come by these days. And oranges could be, too, for anyone who didn’t live in Florida. But miracle of miracles, Logan had procured both things as only he could… and it was absolutely delicious. And absolutely what Max had needed on this shit day she was having.

"Thanks for making this, Logan,” the X5 said now, as she took a sip of the white wine he’d poured for her, because he was Logan and always had the best drinks for every meal. “… And for even using blood oranges to do so—it somewhat redeems red and blood to me after losing Ben. Y'know?"

And Logan, surprisingly, seemed... touched by Max's words, in a way she'd never seen him be before, as his face lit up with the slightest smile. And she had to wonder if she’d finally gotten through to him that he was worth something…. worth so much, really.

"To be honest... I didn't do it for that reason, Max. That thought about colors didn't hit me, even if it seems so obvious now. But I'm glad I was still able to somehow make you happy with it."

And the look he was giving her now was so similar to ones he’d worn when he’d been in the hospital—after his blood transfusion—before she’d taken their kiss in front of the cabin back. And Max wanted to run away... because the idea anyone could want her to feel positive emotions at all was too much for her. And it even reminded her of the feeling she'd had with Hannah, where she’d imagined she was safe and warm for the first time ever—that was scary in and of itself—and it was only in digging her fingernails into the armrest of the chair she was in, that Max kept herself from bolting.

"Logan... I gotta be honest here—and I don't know why; maybe because I'm actually looking for a reason to ruin this night, like everything always gets ruined for us—but today…I thought the body was Ben's victim at first and not him, okay? We were… taught to kill like that back at Manticore. And if it had been one of Ben’s victims instead of him... I would have called this whole dinner thing off, knowing you wouldn't want to be around someone who consorts with killers... but I'm glad it didn't go that way."

"Max..." Logan choked out after Max’s confession: a confession that had made her leave her seat at the table, and head towards the couch and large window behind it, that she’d stared at who knew how many times now? In her peripheral vision, Max could see Logan reach a hand towards her—and she only slightly flinched at it—which shocked her. Max had thought for sure that Logan would put on his Eyes Only persona here and wish to be judge, jury, and executioner, perhaps… but he wasn’t. Instead, tears seemed to sting at his eyes, and at had Max whirling around to face him again, completely taken aback.

"Max... while I'm glad that the situation didn't go that way, either, know that I would never judge you for that kind of stuff. …I know that Manticore made you do horrific things that you would never want to do... And I hope I've shown you how I will be by your side, no matter what."

Max supposed that Logan had shown that—and, in fact, all of the times that he’d saved her life recently began playing in her head—but she still wasn't sure that she trusted it. How many guys had told her that before, in just trying to ring the gong? But this was Logan.

"…Let's just eat," Max decided to simplify things, as she walked back to the dining room table—too enthusiastically, she knew—as she tried to stave off the awkwardness of this conversation. She didn’t quite know what to do with it.

And eat they did... quietly, like the night they had when she'd gone to save Zack from Manticore. And not wanting to go through that awful “date” again, Max finally found her voice again, as she complimented Logan on his cooking like usual. “Logan, this is great… And, God. I can’t even believe these words are about to come out of my mouth… but I don't just mean the food. Maybe- maybe we could try to be something together again... but I'd rather not do it in response to Ben's death."

And Logan wheeled over to Max and looked at her intently now… and it wasn’t unlike the expression he’d worn when he'd done that Eyes Only broadcast for her to save her sibs. Just why did he seem to care about her and them so much? What was in it for him? Max found herself pondering this, as she tried not to swoon in knowing the answer to all of these questions, even though she was still afraid to.

"And I would never ask you to, Max. I know science, and I know facts... and I know tragedy can sometimes push people into intimate settings with each other… and that when the dust settles, it isn’t real and never was.”

There wasn't any bitterness or self-loathing in Logan's voice as he told Max this, she noted. He really seemed to be all about her needs for the night... and it made Max love him all the more, even though she hated saying that word to herself, since Manticore had fucked her up good.

And just as it began to rain outside again—for the three-hundred-and-fifty-seventh time now, Max supposed—she looked over to Logan and told him without missing a beat, "And they also push you into the arms of someone you love."

And the couple watched the rain fall together, again, as the sun began to rise on Seattle. And this time, Max made a move as she laced her fingers with Logan’s and squeezed.

Author’s Note: This story was somewhat a doozy… because as much as I love Max and Logan, they’re always sort of hard to write. Because you want them to get together, of course, but you also want them to be in-character, and their in-character selves can be so bad at humaning with each other. So, it’s a tight line we fanfic writers for them walk, but hopefully this was decent and at least somewhat believable.

Also, I know in canon that Logan was horrified for a while about the murder Max was forced to do as a kid, but I feel the different situation in this AU could have made him respond differently here… and he did.

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oveliagirlhaditright · 6 years ago

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Summary: Logan convinces Max to get a new catsuit, figuring the Familiars and public know her look too well. What neither of them realized was that this outfit was a trap from the Breeding Cult, meant to get rid of Max's immunity to the comet. And when they storm White's base, this becomes apparent when the suit is triggered and Max nearly dies. But then Logan comes and absorbs the effects.

Author’s Note: This plot is... weird. I'm not even going to deny it. But I had another account where I wrote LoMax fanfiction, but have deleted it. And even though you don't see it on this account, I feel like I exhausted every LoMax idea I could think of on that one. Which means I sort of have to think out of the box now to get inspired for them. And I want to be inspired for them. But despite the weirdness, I hope you'll all find a pretty good tragic piece here.

Speaking of which... I didn't want to kill Logan (and yes, this fic kills Logan. Warning you now), because I love love love him and he and Max are the OTP to rule all OTPs. But this is what the muse hit me with. -shrugs- I blame it on me just watching Wesley's death in Illyria's arms on Angel the Series.

Anyway, happy Dark Angel year! Which was really why I wanted to finally post something for Lomax/the fandom again!

“I don’t wanna hear it, Alec. I don’t wanna hear how it was apparently always wrong for me to love Logan… Because he was just looking out for me again, in trying to find a way for me to stay off the Breeding Cult’s radar—…and for me to stay away from him, if that’s what I really wanted—and he died for it! So save your ‘I told you sos!’”

Max wasn’t sure if she was actually being fair with this. Because maybe in having lost Rachel, Alec would understand what she was going through and know not to go there. When she’d told him about Ben, he’d been silent… Hadn’t he?

Well, even if that was true, Max was too livid to give him the benefit of the doubt right now—or to give him with anything for that matter. She wished they weren’t friends, and that they’d never met. Because maybe if they hadn’t, none of this would have ever happened.

All Max wanted to do was curl up on Logan’s couch and die herself. And she did do the former.

Hours Earlier

“So… Why do you think I need a blue catsuit again?” Max asked, as she slid into said outfit in Logan’s bathroom: somewhat remining her of the night she met Mia. But Max refused to think on that now, since she and Logan had actually been good then—all things considered—and now they weren’t.

Logan sighed—Max could hear this with her cat-like ears—before he rolled closer to the door in his wheelchair, presumably so she could hear him even better.

“Because, Max… The Familiars know too much about you now. And what you look like. The public, too, for that matter. This way, you can hopefully change your look enough that people won’t necessarily notice you on missions. I also bet White and his crew think you’d be too arrogant to alter your suit at all. So they probably won’t even think it’s you in this blue suit for a long time.”

There were a lot of holes in this logic, Max knew. But she wasn’t willing to argue with Logan about it today: not when he was being nice and trying to do something to protect her.

But Max wondered if that was all it was. She got the sense, that—despite everything—he preferred the woman she’d been a year ago. And that by even moreso taking her away from that image, he’d be more okay with their breakup.

And if that was the case, Max wanted to kill him… It wasn’t his fault, of course. He still had no idea that she’d lied about wanting it to be over and being with Alec. But there was a selfish part of Max that had to know how he’d ever believed any of those things from her.

But none of this mattered right now, her inner-soldier chastised her. Breaking into White’s new facility was what was on the agenda… And keeping Logan far, far away from her as she did so.

But still… as Max came out of the bathroom and gave Logan a look, she found she couldn’t help poking fun at him like she’d used to.

“Next you’ll say that you expect me to wear red, white, and blue?”

Past Logan would have responded to that negatively, Max knew, in thinking that she was mocking his patriotism and desire to return America to its former glory… whatever that was. But the Logan who had been more chill this year than he had any right to be, just raised an eyebrow and asked, “What?”

Max laughed… and instantly hated herself for it, as she fell back into the bad routine of sitting on his computer desk while he typed away. “Nothing. You can mostly forget about it, Logan… It’s just that one of the few times I managed to go to school as a kid, we got quizzed about police officers. And one of the questions was if they wore red, white, and blue or not… for some reason. Wearing blue just makes me think of that now. Like, social justice warriors should wear some of our flag or somethin’.”

And while Logan didn’t quite chortle at this himself, he did smile at her as he looked at her the way he had when she’d first told him about OC and Diamond at Crash. “Becoming my field commander more and more, I see.”

Really, Max should have seen Logan bringing back that old joke from a mile away… but she hadn’t. And she was glad that she hadn’t, so she could again feel the kind of warmth she’d been craving ever since she left Hannah’s house.

“…Anyway, Logan… What can you tell me about this place that’s trying to manufacture the comet?” Max asked, once again reminding herself to get back to business. The fates of Logan, OC, Sketchy, Kendra, Herbal, Bling, and even Normal—God help her—depended on it.

And for that reason, Max figured there was a good chance she was going to die on this quest: for all that “a life for a life”, and “the universe needs to stay in balance” mentality. And since those muscle brutes wanted a world to themselves and were willing to die for it. But Max still wanted to be alive and kicking, damn it! There was still so much she wanted to do with her home girl, Joshua, her friends…even Alec, the transgenics, and Logan. Most of all Logan.

Logan’s lips formed into a thin line at her question, and Max could tell he was just as concerned as she was—but she tried not to let it show: deciding to adopt Zack’s sense of phony sentimentality, for just a moment—and it told her that as much as he’d been talking with certainty earlier, about how she would be working for Eyes Only again after this… he wasn’t so sure.

“…What’s there to tell? It’s an abandoned airstrip again. And the articles they’re using to try and manufacture the meteor are nasty. Some of these items were used to try and destroy the world before—via water, of all things—and I really wish you didn’t have to be around them. Bring Alec, if you have to. Joshua too, maybe… and whoever else. You guys should probably enter through a weak spot in the roof, land on the scaffolding and jump down to the operation’s center… There will be a few Familiar guards there I’m sure, but hopefully you can take them. Then destroy everything and get the hell out of there.”

Max didn’t have to be told twice. She nodded once, taking it all in that fast, and walked out on the man she loved once again.

But somehow, Max found herself stopping at the threshold this time and turning around. She didn’t really know why she was saying this now, but she was speaking the words: “Not kissing you the night we took down Manticore was the biggest mistake of my life.”

And then she was riding away from Fogle Towers on her Ninja: Logan’s gasp of breath at her news still greatly on her mind, as she headed the way of his savior. The way of Joshua.

…

Everything went to Hell in record time once the transgenics got to their enemies’ lair: Max, Alec, and Joshua had barely made it down from the ceiling before the water of the device had somehow sprung free and been drawn to Max. And at once, it had her seizing in a way she never had before and made her completely useless.

She tried to fight on—and to ignore the pain and the fear—in focusing on the sort of grim determination Jondy had had during their live ordinance drills from back in the day, but it was mostly to no avail. Joshua and Alec ended up kicking a lot of ass for Max… but all the ass kicking was on normal guards, not Snake Cult. Which told Max that this was a setup from the get-go, but then them outing their location so easily couldn’t have been anything else.

Ames White—the only bastard they were looking for who actually was here—just laughed and scurried away, before any of the three of them could catch him. No doubt he thought she was dead and that they’d won: since no one had extracted her blood yet, and nothing could pass on that cure for the real meteor now.

And wasn’t it her end? Even though Max wanted to punch the sky and say “no”, she was starting to doubt that it wasn’t…

And that was why Alec—via Joshua’s command—called Logan over, so he could come say goodbye to her… Her brothers told Max that they were too afraid to try and move her, in case they made her suffer anymore or so that didn’t kill her if leaving her untouched for a moment meant she would have been fine.

When Logan got there, that was when the strangest and worst thing of all happened.

If Max had thought anything would kill Logan, that was from some sort of allergic reaction… it would have been through the Virus. Of course…

Not through his sucking out whatever was in her new outfit into himself.

If Max wouldn’t have been dyingherselfthis instance—while holding Logan in her arms, and not even caring about the damned Virus because now this illness had somehow been passed to him and he needed to know she loved him—she might have ribbed him, for the fact that it had been hisidea for her to get these clothes…

But Max wouldn’t blame Logan for his own death—she never would—and this ensemble would have possibly helped her in two ways, if things had been different, but that didn’t matter now.

Right now? The catsuit she was wearing was disappearing from Max more and more, and leaving her in some sort of red outfit as what was rest of the blue (that was becoming less and less) seemed to rest against Logan in Max’s eyes

One of the Familiars had gotten the idiotic notion, that if they couldn’t beat her then to join her, Max was realizing now: which was how they’d made this… hoping Max would buy the new uniform—and rather foolishly, she had—and that when she’d put it on, it would render her no longer immune to the comet and cripple her? Surely in looking at her genetic code, and the remains of the last time this harbinger had been on the Earth, they had finally figured out what made her immune to it… and how to change that. They’d just needed one chance to infect her, and they’d found it.

…But they hadn’t been counting on the fact that someone who couldn’tbe healed by her immunity would be right by her side, and touch her, and negate it: since the immunity negater thought that if this person couldn’t be saved—and they couldn’t be—it had already done its job.

The furious part of Max—who hated that the love of her life was dying—wanted to despise him for this: that even in his last moments, Logan was still somehow being too big a person and leaving her behind… almost choosing the world over her. Again. But she knew that was ridiculous and shoved the idea down.

Logan hadn’t consciously decided this, after all, and in his last moments he didn’t need to hear these kinds of thoughts.

No.

Max just focused her attention on kissing every available piece of skin on him that she could find—something that she should have done a long time ago—as she held Logan’s hand.

And she would have even been content to die with him—and maybe she still would—if she didn’t already hear Alec begging her to leave since the police were here, and the anti-transgenic cry was already loud enough… And if she knew Logan wouldn’t come back and haunt her, if she didn’t get away now so she could save everyone.

“Logan… I love you,” Max said, with a tingle tear that landed on his cheek: It reminded her of the one she’d cried at Bennett and Marianne’s wedding, that Logan had seen… how she should have married him even back then! And Max chose to believe that his red face right now wasn’t from the sickness, but in blushing in thinking the exact same thing.

“Don’t ever doubt that for a minute… wherever you go, though I’m sure it’s Heaven. I- God, I never thought I’d say these words. It’s so embarrassing and cliché, but… I love you more than I thought it possible to love anything. And you’re the one who showed me how to love… I only pushed you away this last year because I was afraid of losing you. And I can’t believe it’s happening now!”

Logan squeezed Max’s hand here with a surprising strength. And even that took her aback, since she knew he didn’t have much of it left… as he was now turning purple. If only she knew what was even happening to him!

“I love you, too, Max,” Logan whispered, as tears streamed down his own face… that broke Max’s heart into a million pieces to see.

But at the same time… at least it meant he was taking this seriously. And he wouldn’t get to the Pearly Gates, knocking on God’s door, and only then stop to realize all he’d selflessly given up.

“I always have. Always will. And I’m sorry—But I’ll wait for you.”

And it was at this point that Max began openly sobbing like she had with Ben (because hadn’t the “I’m sorry” part been the exact words she’d said to Logan as she died? But unlike what had happened with her, she knew he wouldn’t come back). Logan reached out a hand to put on her face, but didn’t quite make it as he winced in pain.

“Little Fella, we need to go now!” Even Joshua was urging Max at this point, as he tried to pull her along—was Alec doing so too?—even as he stopped for a moment, stammered a few words, and let out a sad and lonely howl.

“…Max, I’m sorry. I really am. I liked the guy too, but I see White coming back now with a red version of his water thing. And if that’s the real comet they’ve manufactured, we’ve got to get plans to share your blood STAT, and-“

But Max paid the two of them no mind—fighting them both and breaking away just once, like she needed to.

“…Logan, if you—the great and powerful Eyes Only—are going to Heaven, then I don’t know how it will ever take me… But if I’ve ever believed in anything, it’s you. So I’ll have faith in you and wait for the moment we can be together again.”

And like she’d been wanting to do for solong—she leaned down and kissed his lips—enjoying it much more than she should have, since they’d been denied it for so long.

But the moment they’d come alive in this way, for the first time in a long time—perhaps even moreso than they ever had been before. And why did Max have visions of dancing behind her eyelids?—was exactly when life left Logan’s body.

And then all Max was aware of, was numbness.

…

The next thing Max knew after she slept—had she slept? When was the last time she’d ever done that?—was her laying around in Logan’s apartment like she owned the place, and really… she should have. God, why hadn’t she married him again?!—and Alec trying to reason with her… about something. But the subconscious part of her mind had blocked it from there, that was for sure.

That was when the conscious part of her mind snapped at Alec, and Max found herself heading back to Logan’s couch: the only place where comfortableness and truths lied.

And then Alec’s words in her ears from far away: “…I wouldn’t have said any of those things, Max.”

Then after Alec went away, Max heard the closing of the door to an Aztec and she cried.

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oveliagirlhaditright · 4 years ago

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The Angel

I wrote this for Christmas, but didn't get it up in time. A Dark Angel fanfic based on "It's a Wonderful Life", where Logan is essentially George Bailey.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29410614

Logan’s PoV

The couple’s original plan—after Logan and Max had went and finally found Max’s mother—was to go to L.A. and meet Max’s old mentor, Moody, as they were both done with the dreariness of Seattle for a lifetime.

But of course… with Logan being Logan, he found himself getting into Eyes Only shenanigans once again. And sometimes he would look over his shoulder and back at Max, and hate how he was disappointing her by doing this.

But the love of Logan’s life seemed to take it all in stride; maybe because she’d realized long ago that helping people was what she did best, too.

"We’ll just go another time, Logan," Max agreed with her husband, as she slipped into her catsuit for the mission tonight. And if Logan hadn’t been checking to make sure he had all of the security cameras down for this venture, he probably would have been staring. "But before we hit L.A., we have to stop this pope from being assassinated. He seems like he actually has a plan for saving this shitty world post-Pulse, and the last thing we need is for this to go down the way it did last time: when Zack's clone murdered that religious leader, who promised the same thing."

"Thank you, Max," Logan answered back, as he paused for a moment to hold Max’s hand in his own and then kiss it reverently. Behind Max, the sun was just beginning to come out; and Logan thought the way that it lit her up as if she was the sun herself, was very telling. "We might finally get to see some good in this world again... And I'll be right there to help you. I mean, I just bought a sniper rifle that I want to use, if I-Tech gets too trigger happy themselves. And I know Alec, Joshua, Jondy, and even OC will also have your back. Once this is taken care of, we'll move to L.A. and never come return."

And have Max's back, they did: something Logan would forever be indebted to his friends for. And the whole mission went off without a hitch...

But Logan and Max still didn't get to go to L.A. to meet Moody, because their actions—despite Logan’s best efforts—still wound up on the news. And while most of the country was warming up to the transgenics, California found it within themselves to warn everyone that the mayor of Terminal City, Max, was banned from visiting California, unless they wanted them to send their police to Terminal City and execute everyone they saw there.

And thus, the pair had to stay in rainy Seattle just a bit longer… but it was partly for another reason, too.

…

It actually took the two geniuses some time to realize it when Max became pregnant. They'd been being careful—and though they eventually wanted children, they hadn’t thought they were ready for it quite yet—as there were still the questions of if there could be issues in having a half-X5/half-human child. But by the time Max had thrown up the fiftieth time, the two could no longer deny what must have been happening with her body.

So, they had all the appropriate conversations, started having doctors’ appointments, and decorating for the upcoming infant: the whole nine yards. And one night, when Logan and Max were lying in bed together after Max had had a particularly trying day, Max whispered a secret to Logan: “I don't think I want our kid to be born in this rainy, depressing city. I know a lot of the world has now joined Cali’s claim, and say they'll kill me on sight if they see me, but I can take them."

And that got a laugh out of Logan, as he brought Max and their little girl closer into their embrace, even if the reason for it was certainly a sobering thought.

Truthfully? Even though Logan had always suspected that Max would feel this way if and when she became pregnant, he'd still somehow prayed differently (even though he felt the same, really. Seattle had as many bad memories as it did good ones). It was just as much as Logan would tell himself he was ready to leave it, he did still have work here. And perhaps he at least wanted to get some more of it done before they really made the jump.

Logan started to say Max’s name, to try and explain this all to her, but she stopped him with a hand placed atop his chest. "Don't get me wrong, Logan. Seattle will always my home. And I'll if course miss OC, and come back and visit her and the crew twenty-four/seven. But don't you think it's time?"

And it was, wasn’t it? Logan had dedicated his heart to Seattle, but did he really want to give his soul, too? Shouldn’t he have been done using Eyes Only as a way to hide and not deal with the less ideal parts of his life? And if that was the case… shouldn’t he have given his dear bride exactly what he wanted? Especially since she had sacrificed so much at such a young age?

"I understand, Max," Logan finally agreed, as he ran his hand through locks of her hair that were curling because of the rare humidity outside. And how he adored that they were. "So, we'll figure something else and raise our child elsewhere. I mean, we certainly want our daughter to get so much-need Vitamin D… ? Damn. This is crazy to think about... but I'm glad it’s finally happening."

This time, it was Max's turn to giggle as she sat up so she could see Logan’s face better. "…It's hard to believe we're finally going to be parents. I always wanted to be one, probably ‘cause of the genes, but for the longest time I thought it would be an impossibility for me, with my insane little life. This is a miracle, Logan. So, let's treat it as a miracle."

And though the two of them definitely intended to do just that… their dream wasn’t meant to be. And something would happen then, that would make them need to stay in Seattle like never before.

…

With how many times Logan had thought the terrorists’ plan to wipe out America’s technology with an electromagnetic pulse was evilly clever… he was honestly shocked that he’d never considered that releasing a pandemic could have had the same near effect, in reducing the place to a third world country. And wouldn’t you know, that just when the U.S.A. was finally starting to get on its feet again, that’s what would happen.

News of the pandemic—though at first wasn’t called that—was slow going. But eventually they realized that’s what it was, and that the WHO wouldn’t let them go anywhere because of it. And when that happened, the first ridiculous thought that entered Logan’s mind was that they weren’t going to be able to find a way to sneak into L.A. with Saia, after all. And he wondered if that was where Max’s mind had taken her, too.

"Do you think this whole thing is really an accident, as they’re saying? …Or was it engineered in a lab for warfare?” Max asked Logan, as she carefully made a baby-led-weaning dish for their newborn. And it was clear by the tone of her voice when she’d said the last words, just which option she thought was true. But as someone who’d been raised to be a genetically engineered killing machine, Logan certainly understood why Max would assume the worst of humanity.

"Honestly, Max? ...I don't know if I care if it was. Eyes Only is playing it safe this time and not getting involved with whoever might have done this... so he can keep his darling wife and daughter safe."

After Logan had said that, Max had apparently decided to not try strawberries with Saia again, after all. The general rule of thumb with infants seemed to be to actually try and introduce foods to them—because they’d have less a chance of being allergic to it when they got older—and if they were maybe allergic to something the first time, to try it again. Max had been debating back and forth on whether she wanted to give Saia strawberries again after her first allergic reaction. And somehow Logan having thrown her off must have made her decide not to.

“…Logan, that’s not like you at all. You can’t just leave this alone. There are bigger fish to fry here,” Max protested.

And suddenly, Logan was standing up—using his exo-skeleton for the one time he would allow himself to do so a day, since it was on its last legs—and embracing his wife. And Saia must have thought it was sweet or funny, because she cooed at it, which made both parents smile for a half-second. “I can and I will leave it alone, Max,” Logan said, moving a strand of curly hair out of the transgenic’s face and kissing her forehead. “You and Saia are too important for me to do anything different. And consider this me making up for times before, where I should have put you before Eyes Only and didn’t.”

And though Max was most definitely a saint these days—even more than he was now, Logan thought, if she wanted to investigate this and he didn’t—his saying this did seem to make her happy. She laughed ever so slightly, as she leaned closer to Logan so he could even kiss her lips. And she then said, “Yes, putting family first it how it should be, Mr. King of Seattle. Want to shield Saia and me first, if it comes down to it. But also don’t forget who you are.”

And while Logan was mostly pleased with how that conversation had gone—and it led to him and Max sitting on the couch, where Logan dipped Saia upside down a few times (being careful to hold her head as he did so) and making her laugh—but in the back of his mind, he couldn’t help worrying that Max might look into the pandemic behind his back, and get herself into trouble.

But that was ludicrous, because he could trust Max. Right? And would she really risk Saia like that? Logan couldn’t imagine it.

So, they put Saia to bed, and then Logan and Max fell asleep on the couch. And he dreamed of a world where their child could be human, X6, or a little of both—whatever she wanted to be—and free.

But of course, Logan’s worst fear came true in the end. Max couldn’t leave well enough alone, and she found out that I-Tech—Beka, rather—had been behind the whole pandemic, and swiftly became catatonic because of it.

…

"Max, it isn't your fault," Logan tried to tell Max for what felt like the millionth time, whilst she rattled off even more numbers that she thought had died because of her.

"Beka is your twin, yes, but she isn't you. So, her creating this agent doesn’t mean you caused the pandemic."

Logan feared that their loud voices would awaken Saia, who had finally fallen asleep even with her bad cold. But Logan knew he also needed to take care of Max here, because she hadn’t eaten in days—which wasn’t like her—and she was even looking inside the fridge now, with no reaction to it whatsoever. Logan was seriously afraid she was even thinking of trying to kill herself in it somehow.

"It's just... as stupid as this is to say, Logan—because I know how far-reaching I-Tech, that was Manticore’s sister, was—I thought this pandemic would moreso be tied to the Eyes Only side of things we do. And while the pandemic's thankfully almost over, with a vaccine coming out—and we can hopefully finally go to L.A. —…it's all too much. And it feels like I did kill all those people.

"Deep down, Logan... I know what you said is true, and that it isn’t my fault. But I just can't just do this right now. The Saia and the Beka stuff... it's too much."

"Max, wait!" Logan called after his wife, having guessed by her words and the tone of her voice that she was going to leave—as that used to always be what she did when things got hard, and old habits were hard to break—but it was too late. She'd already blurred away.

And it was at this point, that Logan started regretting his life choices. Something that was, perhaps, even selfish of him, because this last thing had been Max’s issue. Not his. But if he hadn't pushed her to be a better person so much, would he have possibly just lost his wife right now?

…

After Max was gone for six hours, Logan did something he promised himself he'd never do again, after he’d treated Max so horribly when she’d wanted to break up that time: he started drowning his sorrows again.

And maybe there even came a point where Logan thought he was trying to kill himself with alcohol poisoning. He really wasn't sure... though he still might have drunkenly called his friends and told him he was suicidal, anyway.

Just… what was the point of all of this? Of life, even? Especially if he was going to lose Max, and Saia might now grow up without a mother?

Sure, Logan supposed he had done things that would allow America to shape up into being a great country again. But it was a big “if”, that it even would.

And after his fifth glass of red wine, Logan began hallucinating. Or he was almost certain that he was. Because standing right beside him now, was none other than Max. But it wasn't his current Max. No. It was her as he had first met her: with her short and curly hair, super youthful appearance, and tough girl attitude... Logan could tell the latter, by Max slapping him upside the head the second she stepped closer to him. And Logan in reaction to that, winced and rubbed his head. He felt hurt in more ways than one here.

"What are you doing, Logan?!" the angel asked with fury evident in her tone, and it somehow made his heart swell. "Things suddenly get hard for you, and you just want to die?! Get it together, already!"

Logan sighed resigned, because really? Max was right. Of course she was. But Logan found that he was suddenly so tired... and maybe he was tired enough that he just wanted to rest.

And for the first time in a long time, Logan found himself missing his parents, and wishing they could be here to take care of him and supply him with all the answers he’d ever need.

"I'm just tired, Max," Logan explained to this girl that he would always love. He then tried to wheel towards her and take her hand, but Max wouldn’t have it. And of course she wouldn’t, because if he’d tried to touch her hand, his own would have gone right through and he would have realized this was a dream he needed to wake up from. And apparently Logan’s subconscious mind wasn’t quite ready for that yet. "We always fight the good fight, but what do we get out of it? Do we ever get a reward?"

If Logan had thought that Max would tell him that they fought because it was the right thing to do, or because others would someday take up the fight so that it wouldn’t be meaningless, he would've been sadly disappointed. Instead, she spun him around and somehow showed him a grueling scene. "Let me show you why we fight, Logan. Do you see Alina over there?"

"Alina? What does she have to do with anyth- Oh, God. What’s she doing? She's setting up bombs and blowing up a large portion of the city?! Max, why?!"

"You know what she would do for money, Logan. But in this scenario, where there was no Eyes Only to continue her father's struggle, she grew bolder."

Logan watched everyone around Alina burn. And he'd seen things like this before, of course. He thought—in some ways, perhaps—it wasn't too different from when he got shot. Or moreover, when Max did. Because death was all the same in the end, wasn't it? And yet nothing could prepare you to see people disintegrate before your very eyes. It made bile swim up in his throat.

"...Show me something else, Max. Anything else. Show me a future where we met another way, without all the heroism, and we’re happy! Why don’t you show me something like that?"

"It doesn't exist, Logan. And I’ll tell you why. If you’d never been Eyes Only, the two of us never would’ve met,” Max said in what could be perceived as a bored tone as she examined her nails. And naturally, this caught Logan by surprise as he hadn’t seen Max be like this in a long time. And he blinked at her, feeling angry. But then he saw it: the look of a lie in her eyes, and Logan felt his heart warming instead of growing cold—the only warmth he’d be sure to see through all this coming horror—and he remembered that this version of Max always said the opposite of what she meant.

“Do you really mean that, Max?” Logan asked curiously. And he made sure to slowly wheel even closer to her, since this was the version of the girl, he loved who spooked easily. “Wouldn’t you have still gone after the Statue of Bast?”

And there was that self-assured smirk on Max, that Logan loved so much. “I don’t know what to tell you, Logan. You’d think I would have gone after it when you weren’t Eyes Only, but I didn’t. I guess the red string of fate only connected us when it wanted to make me a better person,” Max guessed.

Or when it wanted to make me a more fulfilled one, Logan thought, but didn’t say—because he’d gotten sucked back into the version of himself that couldn’t express himself to Max. At least here and now. And while before that would have made him sad… now knowing that he had won Max’s heart in the end (even if she had now left?) made it sort of fun, to remember who they once had been.

"What will you show me next, Max? What other awful things happened because I chose not to be awful myself, when everyone else around us is?”

And now Max was looking at Logan furiously—with tears shining in her eyes—and Logan hated himself for having over-reached his bounds here. Because did he know anything of what this different angel had suffered here?

“Just the death of most of my siblings,” Max said nonchalantly, as if none of it really mattered at all. But in knowing just how much Max’s family meant to her, Logan wondered how much it was costing this girl from an alternate universe to act the perfect soldier, that Donald Lydecker had wanted “his kids” to be… which was exactly the thing that had destroyed them in the end.

“Max… if it’s too painful for you, you don’t have to show m-”

But Max was already cutting the former “king” of Seattle off, as she got into his face closer than she had ever dared to back when they’d danced around each other. “Of course I do, Logan. You have it in your head now that it isn’t better being bigger than the system—and no longer think that if you accept things as they are, that you’re part of the problem—so I have to steer you right. I gave you crap about it all when we first met… but don’t you know how much I believed in and admired all that you said? Through it, you helped me figure out who I am. I wouldn’t have stayed with you, if that wasn’t the case. But since you don’t believe it, witness my tragedy.”

And Logan did.

While Brin had actually survived the blast at Manticore before, and Max had later found and rehabilitated her… the Brin of this timeline exploded into a million tiny pieces, when Max and her siblings decided that the best thing they could do for Tinga was avenge her, even at the cost of countless lives.

And then there was Zack… in Logan’s universe—the one he would now start to admit that he loved—Zack, even as a new farmhand, had eventually gotten his memories back and had joined them in the fight for the transgenics’ freedom, but as a changed man: a changed man that Logan would gladly even call his friend now. But where this Max was from… Zack apparently hadn’t been able to handle Max having lied to him about who he was to save Logan, and had killed himself.

And Jondy… Jondy was someone that Logan had waited to meet with bated breath, with how Max had always talked about her. He had wanted to meet Max’s favorite sister nearly as desperately as she had. But when he had actually met her, the two of them had butted heads a lot. Jondy had thought that Logan was using Max for his “greater calling”, and he had thought she was a brat for “always poking her head in places where it didn’t belong” and talking badly about him to Max. But eventually, they’d found a way to be friends. So, seeing her like this now—torn apart as a science project, as Sanderman desperately tried to recreate the cure with her, that had been in Max—was almost too much for him to bear… if the fact that Max must have died in this universe wasn’t enough to already do that.

And Logan somehow pulled this Max into his arms, as the greatest pain he’d ever known (and had felt this twice before, as Max had been shot twice) came back to him. “…Max, without me being there to help… you died taking down Manticore, didn’t you?”

And if Logan had expected Max to express depression at her own death, he would have been mistaken. But he felt she should have been feeling something here, because Max had always valued her freedom so much… But even then, she’d always been selfless, hadn’t she? So maybe she wouldn’t care in the end…

“Max… I don’t want to see or hear anymore. Please, just let me go back to my good life. To you.”

Max’s resolve to give him a clip show lessened then; Logan could see it on her expressive face. But she still allowed him to see a few more things, so his own resolve wouldn’t slip away. Logan saw his dear friends Alec, Joshua, and Original Cindy getting shot at, when they tried to walk out of Terminal City in a Rosa Parks moment.

And then the pandemic that Beka had started took out most of the world, because Max didn’t go to get answers out of her sister.

“Max…” Logan said, as he took her face between his hands now and leaned his forehead against hers (and was it him, or was the sun finally coming up again?). “You were right. And you always are. You should have gone. So, I’m telling you to go now and deal with Beka, and your own conflicted feelings about what happened… be my dark angel, and I’ll be right behind you, always. And I know you’ll always have my back, like you promised.”

And Logan thought he, perhaps, felt this Max’s lips on his own before he woke up. But it was only a “perhaps”, because that Max and him had always been kept at arms-length, hadn’t they?

When Logan came to, the first person he saw before him was Max—even though he’d just let her go—but it was his current Max (the one he loved with all his heart). He could tell by her hair, that was somewhere between the short and curly it had once been, and the long and straight she’d worn it as when she first came back from Manticore.

“Logan!” Max exclaimed—running over to him as fast as she had another time, years ago—as she threw her arms around him and kissed his cheek. “I-I’m sorry! What I said and did… it was wrong. Even if I got Beka to tell me the real antidote… If I knew I was leaving you in such a state, I never would’ve! Promise me you’ll never try to kill yourself again! Promise!”

“Yeah, seriously. Don’t,” Alec echoed, coming out from behind the partition that blocked the computer room from the living area. And there was kindness in his voice. A kindness that Logan had always recognized, which was why he’d told Max that she’d done the right thing in saving Alec’s life. “Max had us all come over here when she saw you—and has had Mia trying to bring you out of your coma—because she thought being surrounded by friends might convince you to live. Logan, don’t throw your life away, man. You did so much for us… so if it ever gets too much for you, you let us know and we’ll be there for you. And I swear I’ll find a way for you, Max, and Saia to get to L.A.”

“Saia! Oh my God, Max! We’re horrible parents! Where is she? Is she okay?!” Thankfully, their little flower was fine. It seemed she had slept through Max’s leaving and Logan’s despair. And now Original Cindy had her in hand, none the wiser to what had gone on with her parents, as she Original Cindy entertained her by showing her how to shake her head “no”.

“We kind of were awful parents here, Logan… despite us always having wanted to be parents—and, yeah: we could probably work on that—but we’re good people. And we’ll get through this. Promise me we’ll get through this.”

“We will, Max. We will.” And the cyber-journalist locked eyes with Max and had a silent conversation with her, like they’d used to all the time. “Starting with seeing if your blood can be a cure for this virus, too. And I know our friends will be there to help us… Thank you, Alec, OC, Sketchy, Asha, Alec, Joshua, Brin, Jondy, and Mia… and thank you, Max.”

And while Logan’s current Max looked at Logan somewhat baffled by his statement, and replied “of course”, the other Max—who really hadbeen there—got that Logan had thanked her, and smiled.

And then she disappeared, going back to heaven like the angel she was.

Her work here was done; one version of her family had gotten to live happily ever after with her. And that was really all that mattered, wasn’t it?

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oveliagirlhaditright · 5 years ago

Text

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26055913

Max and Logan from Dark Angel fluff and pillow talk following the books. Nothing more, nothing less. Fluff. Oneshot. The kind of happiness these two had earned and deserved. Post-the books.

The Right People

Max and Logan were taking a break from having wrung the gong for a number of hours.

Neither of them were really sleepy yet—instead, Logan had been reading beside Max, while she’d been going over the best ways to supe up her baby in her head—so they were just sitting in bed, like the kind of normal couple Max used to dread the idea of becoming… at least if she had to do it with any of the boys she’d slept with while she was in heat.

But how glad Max was, that she now understood the draws of being domestic with someone you loved, as she wouldn’t have traded this life with Logan for the world.

At some point, the two of them ended up back in each other’s arms—they did this sometimes: the being drawn to each other like magnets thing, as the Virus had certainly left them touch starved for each other—not in a sexual way, or even in a kissing way, but in a gently and reverently touching one.

Logan was just running his hands through Max’s long hair—that he must have liked—as she looked at him lovingly: partly wondering what had happened to the old Max, to leave her this way, but mostly not caring because this was pure bliss: the kind of bliss she was used to other people having, like Bennett and Marianne but not herself… which got her thinking.

“…Logan, why didn’t you tell me that Bennett wanted you dead? I thought he was one of your few relatives who actually liked you, but nah. That was only your uncle… who I’m still so sorry is dead, by the way.”

And that drastic change in mood in conversation had Logan pulling away from Max—but not in a way to shut her out; she could tell these things in him now—as he sat up on the bed again, and tried to collect his thoughts.

“And ruin one of the best memories we had together, that way? No. I wasn’t going to do that, Max… Even if he was a moron for wanting me dead not because I ruined the family business, but because he didn’t want to share any inheritance with me.”

Yeah, that—to be honest—made Max want to beat the crap out of him. Bennett didn’t even care that his father had died when the truth about their hover-drones had come out, and rather had just been afraid of Logan making him lose any other payout he might get in the future (from their rich uncle). And Max was reminded of how… betrayed she’d felt when she’d bought Allina’s story about wanting to reunited with her believed-to-be-dead estranged father, only to purposefully get him out of hiding. so she could finish the job and collect the money for the hit.

People who didn’t appreciate their family were beyond Max, and she didn’t want to understand them.

“Honestly, Logan… if you knew he was like that, why’d you ever even bother with writing the toast for his wedding and all that? I would’ve just let the whole ceremony burn.”

And here, Logan rolled over so he could hold Max again… and she had to resist the urge to sigh in contentment, because she still had some pride to her, damnit. “Because I wanted people in my life, Max. And I was looking in all the wrong places. But I’m glad to say I finally found the good ones.”

Max definitely knew what Logan was talking about here. Before she’d met him, her girl Original Cindy, Sketchy, Joshua, and even Alec, she’d dated that asshole Darren—and trusted Justine to not try and steal her boyfriend—and even before that… while Max had maybe made some decent friends elsewhere, she hadn’t been able to let them in and had left them when she needed to without a care in the world.

And surely Logan had met similarly wrong people in Daphne, Valerie, and his entire family. But he’d finally found some people there for him, in Detective Sung, Bling, Sebastian, Asha, some of Max’s own friends… and Max herself, of course.

And to know that you felt perfectly in someone else’s life—to even make it better than what it was—was something Max had never believed in or cherished before, but was certainly beginning to. It made her feel like she had some higher purpose, besides Sanderman’s faulty one, and made her believe that maybe she was more than some kid’s lab experiment that had wandered away from their school.

“Yes, Logan. Aren’t you glad you met me, so I can bring to you all the friends you would have been too lame to find yourself? Like OC, Joshua, Sketchy, and even fucking Alec? I’m also glad you and Jondy are finally starting to hit it o-”

“I love you, Max,” Logan interrupted her, as he leaned down and placed a chaste kiss to her lips—not being deterred by her having tried to play off the moment at all, since he knew that was just her.

And Max giggled—honest to Blue Lady giggled—as she threw a sheet up over them, like they were children in their perfectly created fort. And maybe that’s exactly what they were.

“I love you, too.”

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