#man is RASH AF

[gingersnaptaff]

LADS THERE'S A FUCKIN MABINOGI/NABINOGION VIDEO GAME COMING OUT IN OCTOBER 2025 AND I SWEAR WHEN IT DROPS I WILL BE I N S U F F E R A B L E (more than I already am). By the sounds of it u play as Pryderi after Branch 3 has happened and I'm shsshshsjsjsj. It sounds like there's a Welsh language option also so like dhdhdhdjddj. I'm going crazy.

[littlegreendeathmachine]

Appreciation post for

Ryunosuke “Everybody’s Baby” Naruhodo

Short, scrawny young Japanese man with the appearance and demeanor of a frightened baby deer learning how to walk — mystifies and captivates all who fall victim to the charm of his doe eyed gaze and stumbling to maintain composure or any semblance of confidence.

He is cool without being cool. He’s awkward and clumsy but smart and brave, gentle and calm but rash and indecisive, good at a lot of things and bad at a lot of others. He’s sarcastic and snippy and kind of a bitch but fiercely dedicated to his friends and terrified of disappointing them. And, whether to his uncomfortable ire or his deep personal satisfaction (I like to think he’s maybe a bit of an accidental slut), probably a touch of both, most of these friends have effortlessly fallen in love with him. They desire him. They’re always looking at him like they want to eat him.

The man is an enigma, a paradox. He’s a good boy and a badass. He’s cocky and self deprecating. He’s strong and fearful. He’s cute and he’s punchable. He’s sweet and salty. He is a nobody and he is the GOAT.

Ryunosuke Naruhodo is one of the best written characters in the Ace Attorney franchise. We know so little about him, and yet we feel like we know him.

Everyone loves this weird little guy and he can try to feign ignorance but damn it, he KNOWS IT TOO.

He’s babygirl af. And I hope there’s other people who appreciate him as much as I do. 🖤

Update: someone said “Mr Naruwhoredo” and it made everything so much better

[honeyandruin]

Between the Shadows

Chapter Eight: When the Fever Breaks

“Not all disasters arrive screaming.  Some slip in quietly—   on bare feet,    with warm tea,     and the illusion of peace.”

Pairing: Joel Miller x Reader Rating: Mature Warnings: Emotional intimacy, injury recovery, sickness POV: Second person Status: Ongoing

 “You start to feel safe.  And that’s exactly when it happens.”

----

You’re already half-dressed when someone bangs on your door.

Not the kind of knock that waits for an answer—not polite. It shakes the frame, fast and desperate. Two fists, maybe. You’re on your feet before your mind even catches up, yanking the coat off the hook and stepping into your boots with your laces trailing.

It’s still dark out. Early enough that the frost hasn’t started to melt. You shove the door open and blink into the blur of dawn.

Jesse’s standing on your porch.

Hair damp. Breath clouding in front of him. Hands braced on his knees like he ran all the way across town.

“He collapsed at the gate,” he says, breath hitching. “Think he’s sick. Real bad. Maria said—she said get you.”

That’s all it takes.

You don’t ask if the man’s infected. You don’t ask why Jesse looks like he’s about to puke. You just grab your bag and run.

The air slices at your skin as you move, biting into every patch of exposed flesh. The trail between your house and the clinic isn’t long, but your lungs burn by the time you hit the steps. Someone’s already waiting on the porch—Tommy, arms crossed, jaw locked tight.

“In there,” he says, tilting his head toward the door. “Hasn’t woken up since we got him inside. Fever’s fuckin’ wild. Thought he was seizing.”

You nod once, tight, and shove through.

It’s warm in the clinic, but not in a comforting way.

Stifling. Still. Like the heat is trapped in the walls instead of rising from the little stove in the corner. The man on the table is stripped to his undershirt, soaked through with sweat. His lips are cracked. Fingers twitching, jaw locked tight like he’s grinding his teeth.

You set your bag down and don’t speak.

You’ve done this a hundred times. Pressure in the chest? You check the lungs. A rash? You trace the lines, check the color, make the connections. A broken bone? You steady your hands, brace the limb, ignore the screams.

But this is different.

You peel his eyelid back and his pupil is blown wide—only one. The other trembles. His breath is shallow, rattling.

“Has he said anything?” you ask, voice quiet.

Tommy shakes his head. “Didn’t even get a name. He just stumbled up, collapsed in front of the gate. Couldn’t get two words out.”

You look over the rest of him—no obvious wounds. No sign of infection. Nothing to explain this.

You press a cool cloth to his forehead. His skin hisses beneath it. Not literally, but it might as well. You’ve never felt someone burn like this and still breathe.

And then—

He seizes.

His whole body arches off the table, rigid and violent. A guttural sound tears from his throat like he’s drowning. You drop the cloth and pin him down with your forearm across his chest, fumbling for your bag with the other. Jesse rushes in, grabbing his shoulders.

“Hold him!” you snap.

And he does.

You find the old injectable Maria let you keep locked up—used it once for a broken leg that wouldn’t stop spasming. You jab it into the muscle and whisper something to no one as the convulsions start to slow.

His body slumps.

Silence crashes into the room like a wall.

You’re still shaking when you sit back. Hands slick. Heart racing.

“I need everyone out,” you say.

Tommy hesitates. Jesse swallows. But they both nod.

You scrub your hands clean in cold water and stay beside him for the next two hours. You monitor every breath, every twitch. He doesn’t wake.

And then he doesn’t breathe.

You try to bring him back.

God, you try.

CPR. More meds. You tear into your supplies like a wildfire—but you know it’s over the second his mouth falls open and his eyes stop tracking.

The fever wins.

You sit there beside his body long after his skin cools.

Not crying. Not shaking. Just sitting.

A quiet creak sounds behind you.

You don’t turn.

“Didn’t want to interrupt,” a voice says, low and rough.

Joel.

You exhale slow. “You already did.”

He doesn’t answer. Doesn’t move.

You finally glance back—and find him leaning in the doorway, arms crossed, that damn frown carved deep into his face. But his eyes are soft. Heavy. Like he knows exactly what just happened, even if no one told him.

You rise slowly, the motion stiff and hollow. Like your limbs forgot how to hold your weight.

There’s a pause, heavy and awful.

Then he speaks.

“You need anything?”

The words are simple. Quiet. But they crack something wide open in your chest.

You step toward him—once, twice—and then you’re against him before you can think better of it. Arms around his waist. Face pressed to his chest. You don’t sob. Don’t break. Just hold on.

Joel doesn’t flinch.

Doesn’t breathe, at first—but then one of his arms lifts. Hesitates. Settles at your back. A hand fisted gently in the fabric of your coat.

It’s not a long hug.

It’s not soft.

But it’s real.

And when you finally step back, eyes wet but not spilling, he doesn’t ask questions.

“What else do you need?” he says.

You wipe your face with the back of your hand.

“Water.”

Joel vanishes.

Returns a minute later with a chipped mug, filled halfway. You take it without thanking him. He doesn’t expect you to.

You sip it slow, and for a moment, neither of you speak.

The body is still on the table.

Joel doesn’t look at it. Only at you.

“You’ll tell Maria?” He asks.

You nod.

“She won’t like it,” Joel adds.

You know.

Because this man wasn’t registered. He wasn’t assigned housing. He had no ID, no schedule, no task. He shouldn’t have been in Jackson.

And he died here.

Which means someone let him in.

Or worse—someone brought him.

——

After Joel leaves, the silence stretches too wide.

The clinic feels emptier than it did a moment ago. Not just quiet—abandoned. Like something had been holding the room together, and now it’s gone.

No footsteps. No voices. Just the creak of old wood and the distant churn of wind through the trees. The stove crackles softly in the corner, but the warmth feels hollow. Like it’s heating an empty shell. Like it’s pretending to be comfort.

You scrub the blood from the table in slow circles.

It’s not much. Just a little smear on the edge of the mattress. Dried now. Flaked to rust. But your hands keep moving anyway, like they don’t know what else to do.

You’ve been here before. Different town. Different table. Same feeling. That low, heavy throb in the back of your skull—the one that says something’s wrong, but doesn’t know how to explain it yet.

The man’s body is already gone. Jesse and Tommy wrapped it up in silence, carried it out under the hush of falling snow. You didn’t ask where they were taking it. You didn’t want to know.

You toss the cloth into the basin and grab the shirt he’d been wearing. It’s soaked through—sweat, maybe something else. You check the pockets before burning it, like you always do. Habit. Protocol. Survival instinct.

There’s something folded tight in the chest pocket.

You pause.

Not a note. Not cloth. Thicker than paper. Rougher. Slightly damp at the edges.

You pull it free and unfold it slowly, smoothing the creases with your thumb.

A ration card.

But not one of Jackson’s.

The logo is wrong. The color’s off. It’s thinner than it should be, almost translucent near the folds. One corner is torn, and the printing is just slightly crooked—enough that you’d miss it if you weren’t looking.

You frown.

No name. No registry number. Just a date stamped across the top—expired. Months ago. Someone reused it. Tried to pass it off. Fake it.

You flip it over.

There’s handwriting on the back. Faint. Just one line.

A name.

Your breath stalls.

You’ve seen it before.

It takes a second to place it, but once you do, your gut drops like a stone. That name was on one of your clinic rosters a month ago. A team assignment. Supply run. It had been scribbled down in Maria’s hand, then scratched out in someone else’s—bold, hard lines that tore the page a little.

You remember asking Jesse about it at the time. He’d shrugged. “Guy backed out, I think. Got reassigned.”

Except now he’s dead on your table.

And someone gave him a forged ration card.

Your fingers tighten around the paper.

You try to tell yourself it could be nothing. That maybe this man found the card, maybe he didn’t know what it was. Maybe the name was someone else’s, just a coincidence.

But you’ve survived too long to believe in coincidence.

You’ve seen what happens when people try to disappear. You’ve seen what happens when they crawl back in through the cracks.

This wasn’t an accident.

Someone let him in.

You fold the card again, tuck it into your coat pocket, and try not to feel the sweat gathering at the back of your neck.

It’s not the fever anymore. It’s something else.

You lock the clinic door behind you.

And go find Maria.

—

The council building is quiet, but not empty. A few people linger in the hall outside the map room, whispering in low voices, glancing toward the windows like they’re waiting for something. You don’t stop to listen. You don’t have to—you already know the tension in the air.

Something is coming. They can all feel it.

You knock once on the office door and let yourself in.

Maria is standing beside her desk, flipping through a set of inventory logs. She looks tired. Eyes shadowed. There’s a half-empty mug of coffee on the windowsill behind her, and her coat is still on, like she never planned to stay long.

She takes one look at your face and straightens.

“What happened?”

You reach into your coat and pull out the ration card.

Her thumb runs over the crease, slow. Then she flips it.

“This name…” she murmurs. Not to you—almost like she’s talking to herself.

Her voice trails off, and for a moment she just stares at the writing like it might change if she waits long enough. When she sees the name, her face changes—but not in the way you expect.

Not alarm. Not confusion. Just a stillness.

A quiet, deliberate kind of still.

You know that look. You’ve seen it in soldiers. In lieutenants. In people who already know the thing you’re telling them, but are trying to decide what they can afford to admit.

“Where did you find this?” She asks.

“Shirt pocket. On the man who died.”

She’s silent again.

Then: “Did anyone else see it?”

The way she says it makes your stomach turn.

“No,” you answer, slower now. “Just me.”

She nods, as if that confirms something.

Then she folds the card sharply—one clean crease—and slides it into a folder beneath a stack of papers. The folder has no label. Just a blank, dark cover.

You wait.

Nothing.

“Do you know who he was?” You ask.

Maria lifts her eyes to yours. “You said the name looked familiar.”

“It was on one of your rosters. A month ago. But it got crossed out.”

“You remember that?”

“I remember everything that shows up in my clinic.”

Maria presses her mouth into a tight line.

Then, quietly: “Tell no one about this. Not yet.”

The room feels colder than it should.

“Why?” Youu ask.

“We don’t know anything for sure.”

“But you suspect something.”

Maria doesn’t answer.

Just turns her back and starts stacking papers again. Like you didn’t just hand her a piece of evidence. Like a man didn’t just die on your table with someone’s forged card in his pocket.

“I’ll take care of it,” she says.

You feel the weight of it settling behind your ribs.

The quiet. The evasion. The shape of the lie, even if it hasn’t been spoken yet.

You look at the folder. At her hands. At the little muscle twitching in her jaw.

“What do I tell Tommy?”

She exhales through her nose. “Tell him the man died. Tell him you did what you could.”

“And the rest?”

She looks at you for a long time. Not unkindly. But not like a friend, either.

“Leave the rest to me.”

You stare back. You could push. Could demand answers, names, context. But you don’t.

Because you already know what it feels like to be told nothing. You know what it means when people start hiding things. When they start folding lies into paper and tucking them away in drawers.

You recognize the shape of this silence., and you know it always ends the same way.

Outside, the air bites sharper than before. The sky is darkening by inches. The wind hums low against the eaves. Smoke drifts from chimneys all across town—harmless. Ordinary.

For now.

You walk back to your home with your hands shoved deep in your coat pockets and your jaw clenched tight. The ration card is gone, but the weight of it is still there. Sinking. Heavy.

You tell yourself you’re imagining it. That you’re being paranoid.

But deep in your gut—you know better.

You’ve survived too much to believe in safety.

And tonight… for the first time since Jackson let you in—

You don’t feel safe anymore.

The house feels colder than usual when you get back.

You don't know if it's the weather or your nerves, but the air inside clings to your skin like damp cloth. You light the little lantern on the counter, its glow stretching shadows against the walls. Soft. Familiar. Safe.

You toe off your boots at the door and peel off your coat, fingers stiff with exhaustion. Your hands still smell faintly of antiseptic and woodsmoke and something metallic underneath it all. You scrub them under the faucet for longer than necessary before reaching for the old tin mug you keep by the stove.

There’s still a little of the tea Maria gave you last week—dried pine needle and mint, bitter but soothing. You don’t bother boiling water properly, just heat enough to steep it and pretend that counts.

You change while it brews—shed your shirt, your thick pants, the layers that helped you survive the cold this morning but now just feel heavy. You pull on a long, soft shirt you sleep in—something faded and fraying at the hem—and thick socks over bare legs.

The weight of the day settles low in your spine.

You carry the mug to the window and lean against the wall beside it, watching your breath fog the glass. From here, Jackson looks like any small town. Quiet. Peaceful. Little points of light flickering behind curtains. Voices echoing faintly in the distance. You spot a group of kids walking toward one of the communal houses—laughing, shouting over each other.

It almost feels normal.

It almost feels earned.

You sip your tea slowly, letting it burn the inside of your throat. Your mind drifts back to the man on your table. The way his pupils had moved. The card. Maria’s face.

You think about Joel, too.

The way he didn’t flinch when you touched him. The way he looked at you like he’d already seen the worst of this before.

You close your eyes for a second and exhale.

And that’s when you see it.

Not movement.

Not sound.

Just a color—reflected in the window glass.

Amber. Gold. Flickering.

At first, you think it’s the lantern.

You turn to look—just a glance toward the far side of town. Your stomach turns before your mind even catches up.

A glow.

Not a soft one. Not candlelight. Not a hearth through a window.

This is brighter. More violent. Stretching across the sky like fingers.

You drop the mug.

It shatters against the floor, the hot liquid scalding your ankle. You flinch, but only halfway—your body lurches before your brain can register the pain. The tea burns, your bare foot slips slightly in the puddle, but your instincts are louder.

You’re already moving.

Already grabbing your coat.

You forget the socks. The boots.

Something’s wrong. Worse than wrong.

And it’s already too late.

You don’t even feel the cold as you slam the door open and run barefoot into the night.

[strawberrymochin]

Springtime Fushiguros♪

Context-: exploring the memories of childhood of fushiguros, marking the spring time of you and satoru gojo.

Dropping Megumi at school :- you and gojo drop the fushiguro kids at school.

Megumi comes out of his shared room wearing his new school uniform. You and satoru both decided to admit them to a new elementary to change their surroundings and for better education.

'Megumi-chan, the uniform looks good on you!!' Tsumiki squealed with excitement as you tie her hair into a pony tail.

'Aww Megumi, you look so cute just like your sister.' you couldn't help but melt at this sight. The kids were looking so adorable, just like you imagined.

Gojo ruffles megumi's hair, earning grumbles from him. 'you seem all ready for your new school, make sure you study well. After that when I come home you have practice sessions with me.' Megumi mutters a low 'hm' fixing his hair.

'Come here, Megumi lemme fix your hair.' you say, 'And satoru, go get their scl bags.'

'where is it?'

'Ofcourse in their room. Go get it fast. Don't wanna be late on the first day of class.'

Megumi comes to you as gojo goes to fetch their bags. You fix his hair quickly and tell him to join Tsumiki at the table and have breakfast.

You were in the kitchen where gojo brings their little school bags. You've already prepared their bentos. Decorated with utmost love and affection. You've left the lunch open to let the hot steam evaporate a bit and now it's time to close the lids and stuff them into their school bags.

Gojo takes a bite out of megumi's lunch box, when you protest 'hey! No eating out of kid's lunches.'

'But I'm hungry, just one more please.'

'nope. I've already made pancakes for you. If you're hungry then have them.'

'But you didn't decorate it like these lunches.'

'are you a kid?'

'don't you love me? I want some of that too.' How can you forget the strongest sorcerer can be such a pain in the ass. He sulks as you question your life decisions.

'Gross!' a voice interrupts gojo's sulking. You both peek out of the door to see Megumi giving a disgusted look at his Sensei.

'What do you mean by gross?!' an offended gojo questions the black haired tetchy boy.

'By gross I mean your behaviour.' Megumi declares offending gojo even more. He storms off the kitchen to lecture the 6 year old on how to show respect to his elders, which the kid deliberately ignores.

You sigh realising what you got yourself into. You turn to the counter refilling the empty space of Megumi's lunch box, gojo ate. A smile appears on your lips unconsciously, you know you will see them bickering like this a million times and maybe that's a thing you would treasure.

Tsumiki watches gojo lecturing her brother, who doesn't even spares him a look and continues eating his breakfast as if the man shouting beside him doesn't exist.

'Enough! Finish your breakfast. Otherwise we are gonna be late.' you want, shutting gojo up.

'I'm done.' says Tsumiki, Megumi follows her next after finishing his breakfast. Gojo's the last one to finish, after stuffing the entire pancake into his mouth at once, earning a critical look from you three, to which he responds, 'whmff wff afe geffimg lffe?' (he chokes on his pancake)

Tsumiki couldn't suppress her laugh watching her guardian struggle choking on a pancake, 'what language on earth is he speaking?' asks Megumi, creeped out.

'nothing he's just telling we will get late, now you two get your bags while I deal with him.' you drag gojo to the bathroom, hitting him firmly on the back to help him vomit.

After dealing with gojo and his dumb decisions, you go quickly to fetch your camera.

'whats that for?' gojo asks after gulping water, coughing a bit.

'To take a group picture, now hurry!'

You set the camera on a tripod, setting a timer gathering the kids as gojo joins in. 'Come on kids, smile.' Tsumiki smiles for the picture, Megumi does too. You squat down to their height along with gojo.

1

2

3

Click

~♡~

After gojo's rash driving, you guys reach the school and you wish both of them good luck for their first day in school with a kiss.

Extras-:

You noticed gojo sulking while he drove you back to the apartment.

'hey what happened? Whats with the sullen face huh?'

'YOU DON'T KISS ME WHEN I LEAVE FOR WORK! This is partiality.'

[im-ovulating]

Gurll, i had this idea of my mind lately, so aro and reader where he choseses her to be his mate cus he find her quite intersthing and reader here is very afraid of him cus he is strong as af and is vampire but one day reader tells aro that she isnt his toy and aro gets mad , the rest is up to you bestie 💅😌

(A/n: Sorry, babe- I was in an angsty mood when writing this😅)

(A/n: Not proofread and written on mobile, so forgive any mistakes-)

Word Count: -

Summary- Choices have consequences. Though... some consequences can be dealt with if you're willing to make a new, darker choice. (Aka: Aro "Sulpicia's" the reader, ifykyk)

Warnings: None

Age Rating: None

Aro Volturi x Fem! Reader: Choices

-------------------

You hate him.

You give a tug to the window, but to no avail. It's one of the highest windows, so you don't know what you would do if it did open. You're not that desperate yet. Though, considering how Corin is probably just outside the door, you doubt you ever will be.

Who does he think he is? You're a person, not a goddamn animal he can cage.

Moving to sit on the bed, you glare at the locked door. Maybe if you stare long enough, you can bore a hole into it, you think pathetically.

You fucking hate him.

All you had wanted to do was go shopping. I mean, if you're going to be stuck here forever, you might as well get to know the good shops from the bad ones early on. But no~

That's what Aro said when you told -keyword: "told," not "asked"- him you were going out today.

-

"No." Aro doesn't cease his reading to even spare you a glance.

"I wasn't asking," you scoff, turning on your heel to exit the throne room.

One second, you're leaving the ornate room. The next, Aro is in front of you, blocking your path.

"Neither was I, dear." The nickname is sour, dripping with condescension. " You're not to leave the castle without the guard. Do you see the guard here today?"

Your jaw sets. "Does talking to me like a child make you feel like a big, strong man, Aro?" You are surely going to regret this later, but you are past the point of caring right now.

"You have got to know you're pathetic. That's why you keep me under 24/7 surveillance, isn't it? Can't keep a partner with free will - you've got to lock 'em up?-"

Before you can dig any deeper, Aro has your arm in a bruising grip, practically dragging you through the castle.

He ignores your protests and struggles.

Before long, you're standing in front of a heavy, oak door. There are two lower guards standing on either side and a woman waiting, poised to open the door upon instruction.

The grin Aro turns to you with sends a shiver down your back.

"Since you're so eager to throw around the phrase "locked up", I figured it is only fair to show what it is really like. Corin?"

The woman opens the door, revealing a massive bedroom.

Two and two click together at the sight. "You can't be serious! No! You can't do this!"

"Oh but I can," Aro responds, pulling you inside.

"Until you learn to behave, this is where you will be staying. And don't think about doing anything rash - Corin will make sure you remain docile."

The woman -Corin- gives you a mock head bow, "At your service, M'lady~"

-end

[girl-named-matty]

House of Gaunt pt.2

This is basically just some lore dumping about Ominis family in my lore. I have so much its kinda ridiculous at this point but I feel the massive need to share it so here we go. This is just barely a fraction of it but it'd take me forever to explain it all.

Also just a disclaimer that my version of the Gaunts is decently different then the one you read about in the Harry Potter universe. the HL universe itself doesn't exactly align 100% with what is canon in the HP universe anyway so who cares LOL. Tw: We all already know the Gaunts are violence af but either way, mentions of violence, cruelty, suicide, etc... Nothing graphic at all however I just felt the need to mention that just in case.

Starting off with the old man. We have Cyrus Gaunt, the head of the family.

(obviously he looks older than he does here-- since he's old af but I'm just working with what I got lol) Cyrus is the father of the five children + the head of the Gaunt family. He's the oldest out of all of his own siblings, hence why he ended up as the head. To put it frankly, he's a psychopath and crazy. On top of all the crimes the Gaunt family commits against Muggles, Squibs, and other Witches/Wizards who don't share his ideologies, he also runs an underground smuggling organization alongside his brothers and two of his sons. That alone has racked up his crime record.

His marriage to his wife, Belladonna was 100% arranged but he found some sort of love in her eventually. Definitely not your stereotypical loving husband and wife. However she gave him children and is a pureblood supremacist so that was really all he was asking for.

In the simplest way possible, he is a cruel man who doesn't care if he harms others. Or even if he himself gets harmed in the process as long as he has fun doing it. His son, Marvolo, was actually the one to give him the massive scar. He and Marvolo had always had a rocky relationship ever since his sons birth and when Marvolo was fourteen, he had really pissed his father off.

Cyrus threatened to throw Marvolo out if he couldn't prove he was worth something. He challenged him to a duel and said if his son could even get one hit on him--he could stay. Marvolo, not really caring what happened, just wanted to take the opportunity to fight his father. One thing led to another and Cyrus ended up with that massive scar on his face. (smooth move bro).

So yeah he's miserable and a total pain but gotta give it to him for being so persistently annoying.

Moving onto the mama of the family: Belladonna Gaunt.

Belladonna Gaunt is the unfortunate woman to have married that stick in the mud up there. She holds strong pureblood ideologies however she's much less cruel than her husband. However that "less cruel" part really only applies to her family or close friends. She loves her children and that's pretty much it. Of course there is some kind of love between her and her husband but it feels more "professionally forced" if you know what I mean.

So needless to say she was quite upset anytime Cyrus did anything rash against their children since she didn't agree with it. However, that doesn't exempt her from the Gaunts regular hobbies of torturing muggles in their own living room. She hardly actively participated but she often watched and found enjoyment in it.

But things like the night Ominis' was crucio'ed for the first time, she left in tears before anything happened--clearly upset about her husbands choice to allow his older brothers to do that to him.

Despite this, her beliefs are still deep rooted in pureblood supremacy and she does believe in violence against others she doesn't see as equals to her. Sooo she definitely does have her flaws.

Onto the oldest: Aurelius Gaunt.

Ever heard of parents picking favorites? Well yeah, he is the perfect example of being the favored child. His name, Aurelius, can be translated to "The golden one" (lol the golden child) which pretty much speaks for itself. However, that's not it. His middle name is Avyaan/Avyan (however you prefer to spell it) which can literally be translated to "he who has no imperfections" so yeah.. you guys can pretty much guess how they feel about their son based on that.

In that time period it was very desired to have a son, specifically a firstborn who was a son. Someone who could carry on the family name and legacy and so the Gaunts got exactly what they wanted when their firstborn was a boy. Aurelius grew up as the golden child, basically being the perfect son his parents wanted him to be. Cruel, willing to do anything for them (even if it was illegal) and much, much more.

Aurelius' approach to acts of cruelty tend to be much different than how most of his family approaches it. He tends to analyze things before going straight into it. But sometimes he just doesn't care, it really depends on what he's feeling like. Aurelius helps his father run the underground smuggling organization and is his fathers successor to the Gaunt family name and fortune.

He's always had a bit of a rivalry with his younger brother, Marvolo, and that sprouted feelings of hate on both sides but he's more tolerant of Marvolo than Marvolo is of him. Aurelius married a pureblood girl from France and they have two children.

However following the events of Matty Ambrose's 7th year at Hogwarts while Aurelius was roped up in Leona Oswald's crimes, he was eventually put in Azkaban for his crimes , which was quite shocking seeming how often the Gaunts could weasel their way out of punishment for their actions. Although that was mostly due to the fact that Marvolo was persecuting him himself.

However years later, Aurelius ended up being released on a deal that he would no longer participate in acts of crime and would have no association with his family outside of his wife and his children. But he was eventually allowed to attend the funeral of his mother, father, and sister but nothing else other than that. And because of that deal, everything he would've gotten from his family instead went to Marvolo (which was the reason why Marvolo even attempted to put his brother in prison in the first place, even though he himself was arguably worse). Aurelius lived the rest of his life in rural area in France with his wife.

Next in line is the crazy one we all already know: Marvolo Gaunt.

Now you might be looking at him and be wondering: Why isn't he short, ugly, and look like a monkey??

As I mentioned earlier, this universe does differ from the HP universe. But don't worry, he gets what's coming to him and later on in life he gets cursed and that's when he becomes ugly and starts looking like a monkey as described in the books I promise LOL.

But now that we've got that out of the way, let's start talking about this git. Just as firstborn sons were desired so they could carry on the family name and legacy, second born sons were desired too... as backups.

Yup, that's basically why he exists to his parents. And they never even tried to hide that from him. Belladonna and Cyrus hoped to have a second son just in case something ever happened to Aurelius--and they did end up having a second son but since nothing ever happened to Aurelius till much later, they severely neglected Marvolo throughout his life. Marvolo was born crazy and violent, that just a fact. However his childhood did have an impact on him which led to him being even more inclined to commit crimes and do horrible acts.

He fought constantly with his siblings, his parents, and basically anybody around him. He misbehaved and was punished severely because of it and he got in trouble with the Ministry several times. Each and every time his father would have to pull some stupid strings to get him out of that situation. Marvolo saw the way they treated Aurelius and was massively jealous of his older brother, so he tried to get his parents to treat him the same way.

He had a better relationship with his mother than he did his father as at times Belladonna did show that she cared about him. But Cyrus put Marvolo in enough dangerous situations carelessly to make known that he didn't care that much at all.

But if there was one thing that he knew his parents liked, it was violence. So he was going to upstage his brother in any way possible to "make his parents proud". This led to him being driven to mass violence and deeper and deeper into madness. Eventually driving him to the point where he killed and tortured innocent people for his own fun and enjoyment. His parents did end up liking him a bit more for that, knowing that if there was anyone they didn't like and needed gone, that Marvolo would take care of it in a heartbeat (as long as there was something in it for him.)

To gain revenge on his older brother, he ended up black mailing Matty in her 7th year at Hogwarts in order to get her to gather information about Aurelius' hand in Leona's crime organization in order to put Aurelius away for good. Of course, this wasn't exactly easy because Matty was like "tf?? no??" but eventually he was able to force her into helping him after the Aranshire incident (ifykyk.)

Eventually this plan worked and Marvolo ended up with all of Aurelius' inheritance and would later on become the head of the family after Cyrus' death.

Later in his life, Marvolo was forced to marry a pureblood girl he didn't care much for. He had two children, Morfin and Merope (we all know them) but didn't care much after his wife died. It did send him spiraling a bit but not because he was sad but because that meant he had to deal with the children alone.

His sister-in-law was extremely angry due to his carelessness regarding his wife and her sisters death. So she was the one that ended up cursing him, leading him to look like how he's described in the books. (deserved lolol)

Moving onto the middle child and first daughter: Selene Gaunt.

Out of all the Gaunts besides Ominis, Selene is one of the more moral ones. Tbh she's kinda a girlboss and I love her for that. Selene is the oldest and first daughter in the Gaunt family, so naturally she was doted on a little bit more than her other siblings growing up. She is pretty much along the lines of the stereotypical oldest daughter. She takes care of her siblings, makes sure things runs smoothly, but finds her siblings extremely annoying LOL.

She does have favorites and it's Ominis, simply because she doesn't find him as annoying. Her ideologies aren't nearly as deep rooted as her family but she kept that a secret. Truly, she didn't care that much about pureblood supremacy and didn't exactly agree with the torture of innocent people. Out of all of them (except Ominis), she has the cleanest record.

However she fell in line just to please her family. She did what she was told and that's how she stayed out of trouble. She dislikes Marvolo and Lyssa the most since she thinks they're annoying. Especially since Lyssa basically became a "mini-Marvolo". Now THAT annoyed her.

She'll be the first to tell them to shut up and start acting civilized and is definitely the more sensible one. Like Ominis, she was quite close to her late Aunt Noctua, which is the reason why she is the way she is. But she keeps the fact that she's not as dedicated to her families ideologies as they are a secret.

Per request of her family, she married a pureblood man, settled down and had children. Unfortunately her death came rather early in life but she was remembered well by her brother Ominis. She was the only family member he really ever stayed in contact with after leaving.

(and we all know who Ominis' is so we're just going to skip down to Lyssa lol)

This is Lyssa Gaunt, she is the youngest out of the family and the craziest outside of Marvolo. Lyssa, like Marvolo, was born with mental issues that effected her life from her first breath. And growing up it never got any better. When she was first born, her parents couldn't think of a name for her. They did take note of how quickly she'd get so angry even at a very young age, so like the horrible parents they are they decided to name her after the Greek Goddess Lyssa, who represented rage and fury (and rabies in animals, if you wanna go that far lol.) So the name unfortunately fit.

Lyssa grew up doing cruel things from the get-go, whether it was torturing small animals or pulling harmful pranks to her nannies and the help around the house. But since her parents were older and busier by the time she was born, she was hardly punished for any of this.

Marvolo had tried to get Selene and Ominis to follow in his footsteps of madness however he knew that wasn't going to work out. So he turned his attention to his youngest sister. He enabled and encouraged every bad thing she did, which caused him to quickly become her favorite sibling. They were really the only two who ever got along outside of Ominis and Selene.

Lyssa was also very naturally talented at legilimency from a very young age as well. (It's a trait I HC most of the Gaunts have, however think of her like Queenie Goldstein from Fantastic Beasts). This made it so she could easily see inside people's heads, invading their privacy and finding out personal information about them. She was later used to find out information about the Aranshire incident and anything Matty had to do with it (which enabled Marvolo to use that information to blackmail her.)

Lyssa's only friends at school were the rats she found scurrying around. She'd use the unforgivable imperio to make them do anything she wanted.

Unfortunately for her, Lyssa's life ended much sooner than the others and she was never quite sure if she ever experienced true happiness. She really only felt exhilaration and "glee" from cruelty but never true happiness. In quick attempts to get their last child married off, Cyrus and Belladonna forced Lyssa into an unhealthy marriage.

However, unlike her siblings who complied. Lyssa refused and it did not go well for her, unfortunately. Lyssa took her own life within the first couple of months of the marriage, believing it was the only way to escape. She was only nineteen when this happened.

Her death only threw the Gaunts down a more slippery slope as it was the beginning to their massive downfall that would eventually render the Gaunts irrelevant, powerless, poor, and reduced to nothing but shameful criminals.

Well if you read through all of that--dang, im proud of you LOL. It's pretty grim however that's exactly how the Gaunts are so I'd say unfortunately it's pretty accurate. But thank you for reading anyway and I appreciate it! ❤️

[quietautoportrait]

Random thoughts I had while reading the Book of Bill [spoilers ahead]

Yeahhh, I’m not doing that.

First of all this book costed me $25 (twenty five) dollars, I am not writing anything on it.

Second, I am black!! So no! :D

Yup, this is creepy.

OH ? 😀

I am not turning that page again 😀

Wrong. I will never die as long as memories of me live on, so we’re even. You should have watched Coco, loser.

McGucket catching a stray, oh my god ?

You!!! Cannot trick me ! ! ! Compliments will get you nowhere! I am LOVED and CARED for !!!

The pages don’t have numbers, why would you do this to me ?

Silly Straws®, teehee. Serious Straws™, nuh huh.

Jokes on you, I live in Canada and I already have chronic depression. Sucl on taht looser.

Okayyyy, I guess I’ll try ONE demonic pact just to know how it goes.

Laws are made up!

(Please what’s the password)

The puns, good lord.

What is it with you and licking stuff ?

I don’t think you can advise anyone on fashion style really. Monopoly man looking ass triangle.

I don’t have it in me to decipher (haha) the secret messages today, please.

I wonder if the barcodes work.

Maybe he stole one of TS’s Grammies.

This book is hilarious

The book reading me :

Optimus prime most perfect being in the universe now canon.

I’ve never wanted to read the Great Gatsby.

Hi Stanford :D

Going from “trust no one” to “you have to trust me” is insane, near death experiences really do change a man.

Of course I have free will, I’m reading this book 🤨

Iron deficient people all hate Dennis.

So far I’ve learned nothing from this book, Bill literally scammed me wth ?

That’s not how you write creeticsm.

Bill polyamorous officially canon.

That is indeed a tall hat.

Cause of death : Devoured by hummingbirds.

Being “too annoying for hell” is crazy, yet fair.

Will somebody ever match my freak? </3

Scrimbles last wish was for me to see the next page, I simply obliged.

All I’m hearing is that there ARE places where other Bills WON weirdmageddon except YOU 🫵

Are you ashamed ? I would be ashamed. This is shameful.

They do have big heads tho, it’s true…</3

You’re so obsessed with the kids it’s getting weird, stay your creepy ass inside!!

Possessed Mabel is my new obsession.

Is that a pair of scissors??

Dripper Pines is not following up to his name; outfit’s whack af. Sad, disappointing.

Bill you are not that popular, please stop.

She dumped your ass, huh

I AM A REPULSIVE BEAST OF UNFATHOMABLE WRETCHEDNESS, GROTESQUE BEYOND MEASURE! I FEED ON YOUR DISGUST! I AM REPUGNANCE INCARNATE, AND SHAME CANNOT CLAIM ME.

He’s so real

Stanford aromantic officially canon.

Oh my lord, Dipper what did you hear baby :(

I love Soos so much please stop playing with me.

Oh no, Pacifica honey :(

You’re so obsessed with Dipper, please get a JOB.

I wonder what’s the name of the group chat.

I had to google “sascrotch”.

I love Dipper so much please hold on.

The search history…oh I would have kms.

#drankcoffeeheartfeelweirddying?

No, but does killing a ghost make a double-ghost tho?

I feel like a need a whole section for the search history, Dipper wtf

A hot glue scented candle :((

Big ass head

Why would there be a freaky Friday support group online Dipper…come on now..

Grow extra finger impress uncle :(((

I hated that, thanks for showing it to me.

Mabel chaotic lawful now confirmed.

“Fantasy” by Mariah Carey, she’s so real

Emphasis on “Rash” and “Out of character” cause some of y’all freaks decided to get super mad at a 12yo girl 🤨

Huh…McGucket’s mind definitely feels different to him. Good to know 🙂

We thank him everyday for his memory-erasing gun

Didn’t you say you’re not dead ?

“I looked up and saw the stars. And I was ready to be one” okay you ate that one little thing, I’ll give you that.

Bill…did you unexpectedly cause a genocide..?

That’s a lot of things that I will not unpack.

I am getting wayy too much information about his love life than I wish to.

Please enough.

Well, Time Baby didn’t destroy his dimension now, did he ? Your only similarity with him is that you’re the last one of your kind 🤨

That man had his first encounter with Bill on Feb 3rd 1901, yet the inventioneers’ fair news paper was out in Jan 22, 1901…?

I too have had enough of the French.

This is the blood of a killer Bella.

Bill is such a boyfailure (tri-failure?), he’s been trying to get on earth since the dinosaurs!! Just give up! Do something else!

How can a broken science experiment lead to so much drama. Please kids, don’t go to school.

That waitress was so lame, it was funny!

You set a what on fire ? 🧍‍♀️

You didn’t go no-contact, you killed everybody 💀

Boy, oh boy am I excited to read the fandom’s theory about this >:)

The getting along sweater ™

McGucket turning into the third Pines brother.

He already had trust issues Bill, did you really have to give him a slogan ?

I love them so much, if I ever catch teen Stanford it will be on sight.

“He may be a god, but I am a scientist.” Coldest bar in GF’s existence. Speak your truth bestie.

Oh ok, this is creepy 😀

Your hate of grammar mistakes doomed us all Stanford </3

Well, this is terrifying.

It’s so extremely sad how if any of the twin had died during that period, no one would have ever known about it…

It upsets me so hard how fast he jumped to the conclusion that Stanley broke his machine on purpose. Even then, I would simply not let my twin get thrown out the house with NOTHING to survive. Did he even graduate high school?

“Too cool for the FDA” is insane, someone had to beat him up, this is crazy.

You didn’t “abandon” your family. Your dad is a piece of poo and doesn’t deserve your time nor your support. He can go choke tbh. Also, Stanley’s definitely gonna make fun of you, he’s your brother dude 🤨

Is Ford a Taurus ? No reason for him to be that stubborn.

I admire his dedication to be a menace.

Ngl, that was a weird break up story.

Why is it always a handshake with you? Why can’t we make a pinky promise?

He misses Ford so bad.

If Stanley isn’t an irredeemable screwup then neither are you Stanford.

Oooh, being called a needy theater kid…I would have shot him not gonna lie.

He’s been talking it out this whole book Mabel, I don’t think he’s ready to move on.

Dipper is talking to all the Mabel haters reading right now btw, he told me all about it.

Are you really a con master if you got caught every single time ? :(

Oh now you’re obsessed with Stanley? Damn that’s crazy, you really need to talk to someone about it.

Ugh, now I feel bad for him. Deserved tho, seek therapy dude.

LMAOO???

The henchmaniacs didn’t call? They suck so hard, what the heck

I love these nerds so much.

[yakool-foolio]

Ayyy Maria's here! Oh god, now Gregson's claim of evidence fabrication is in hot water. AYAYAY STRONGHART DON'T PULL THAT SHIT! I BELIEVE KAZUMA IS TRUE TO HIS WORD! Gregson doesn't seem like the type to lie either, even with a sword to his throat, especially if it was to help out Kazuma in chasing down the truth.

Mikotoba coming in clutch! Everyone's working together to solve this case! Klint ate a ring?! Phoenix's role model right there! Wait- retract that, cause this ring might actually be the fabricated evidence we were searching for!

This is the first time Kazuma's ever hearing about Genshin protecting Van Zieks, mere days before his arrest as the supposed Professor. Oh he's not happy in the slightest brace yourselves. He wants Van Zieks to be guilty so bad, he can't even comprehend any other possibility. He believes he's staring Death in the face, unable to fathom that the scythe brought down upon his father did not belong to this caricature of undeserving fate he's crafted in his mind.

A change of heart! But not without Kazuma still bashing Van Zieks. It's a step in the right direction. We'll sentence them to a day stuck together in the 'get along' shirt after this trial's over.

WOAH Sholmes wired the prison?! This man is everywhere all at once! Are there secretly clones of him running around doing errands?

They let Genshin have Karuma in his cell?! He may be bringing a sword to a gun fight, but this is a potential serial killer we're talking about! I guess his true weapon is his word. HEY NOW whaddaya mean Klint wrote the fake will? WAIT this will was not of Genshin's, but of Klint's own final words?! KLINT CHOSE DEATH?! VAN ZIEKS IS NOOOOOOOT OKAY!

UHHHHHHHH CHAT I DUNNO WHAT THE SECRET IS I'M AFRAID I'M VERY AFAID

KLINT WAS THE PROFESSOR?!

Now the suffering that Kazuma bore for all those agonizing years is passed onto Van Zieks in this horrid revelation. Two families drenched in blood.

Baskerville mention after all this time! So it's the maiden name of Klint's wife's family, huh. Not surprising that Sholmes wanted Iris' story naming them to be left unpublished, as they're connected to the Professor case with Klint. Genshin killed Klint to end it all on his own terms, because no one else would listen.

"I did what I had to do" YOU GOT KAZUMA'S DAD KILLED YOU FUCK OHHHHHHH AND YOU USED KAZUMA TO MANIPULATE HIM INTO ACCEPTING THE JAILBREAK PLAN RRRRRRRRRRRRRRR HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE-

AHHHHHHH NOOOOOO AND NOW KAZUMA'S UPSET

Damn Stronghart this horse you refuse to get off of is really tall. He thinks he's such a smartass for confessing to being the Reaper in a closed trial. I'm gonna take so much satisfaction in wiping that smirk off his damn face.

AWW RYUNOSUKE N KAZUMA MIRRORED EACH OTHER! Caiden you better give that message to Kazuma RIGHT NOW! Let him hear his father's last words! 'Twist thy head' ooooo wait has Karuma held a secret this whole time?! IT KEPT KLINT'S WILL THIS WHOLE TIME! YOU CAN'T RUN NOW STRONGHART!

Oh shit Genshin and Klint dueled?! That's one cool way to go out. Yoooooo this art slaps! Stronghart ordered Klint to kill these people, including the former Chief Justice that he then took the title from! Klint's final words were metal af.

By the rash orders of Stronghart, Jigoku shot down his friend... You manipulative son of a bitch! GET HIM KAZUMA, TEAR HIM APART! FINISH WHAT YOUR FATHER STARTED!

OH GOD HE'S BECOMING AN EVEN WORSE GANT AND HE'S STILL NOT QUITING UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHUT UP I BEG YOU NOOOOOOOO WHY IS THE GALLERY ON HIS SIDE

OHHHHHHH SHOOOOOOOOLMES! SHUT THIS FUCKER UP PLEASE! AYYYYY HE'S DANCING! BRO WHAT'RE YOU DOING AT BUCKINGHAM PALACE?! YOU'VE GOT CONNECTIONS TO THE QUEEN DUDE?! This just in: Sholmes invented livestreaming.

TRIAL BY FIRE! LITERALLY! HIS GOOSE IS OFFICIALLY COOKED!

(To Whom It May Concern - @raymondshields)

[sunmontuewrites]

TMI below the cut - discussing my first time having sex with a guy. Nothing explicit at all, just general musings.

My first time with a guy, I was a few weeks shy of my 19th birthday.

I was going to a friend's 21st birthday a 6-hour bus ride away, and his family knew my family and my mum (being her VERY liberal self) just told me to have a good time.

Now - I was quite over being a 'virgin' - keep in mind this was back in the 90s and I was then a product of my time and upbringing. I had had a sexual encounter with a female when I lived in Sweden, but didn't count it (I count it as my first time with a woman now though). ANYWAY, I digress.

I wanted to get this pesky virginity thing over and done with, and this weekend (to me) was the perfect opportunity to find someone and get rid of it. 

Now, birthday boy was an out gay man, and his 21st birthday party was held at a gay night club. Awesome. (Keep in mind the drinking age in New Zealand was 20 at the time, and it was a 21st birthday, but I'm there as a friend of the birthday boy). So - it's safe to assume that people in attendance thought that I was at least over the age of 20, if not actually closer to 21 (probably assuming I went to high school with him or something, I don't know).

Anyway, I see this man, he's very good looking okay? 6'6", broad AF, STRONG looking. We spend the night dancing together (filthy hands all over dancing, we're in a night club). He asks if I want to go home with him. I definitely do.

We have sex THREE TIMES, and one of those times was in the shower. He was freaking attentive and generous and I loved every fucking minute and still think back on that night VERY fondly. (He was strong enough to pick me up, which was a treat).

Next morning he drives me back to my friends' place and drops me off, makes out with me in the car and then says bye. All good with me, that's what I signed up for (he knew I lived 6 hours away - we did manage to talk a bit between grinding on the dance floor). 

HOWEVER - it was NOT safe sex. (And this was the first time I learnt that I get a skin rash with latex, so it was a good thing that only the first time we used a condom). But my friend took me off to the medical centre to get the emergency contraceptive pill. When I got back to my hometown I talked with my mum and organised to get checked for all the STD/STIs. (My mum admitted she was very envious of my first time, because having a guy who knows what he's doing your first time is apparently a good thing, unlike her first time.)

Now, I learnt after, that this guy was 28 and my friend's helicopter instructor (he was doing a Bachelor of Aviation). So it was understandable that he knew what he was doing. 

So... I was thinking about the warnings that would have to be slapped on this if it were a fic on AO3. Age difference? Unsafe Sex? Dubcon? (We were both drinking, but not to the point where I didn't know what I was doing or agreeing to at all times). 

[ddelline]

ch83—136 | a shibuya OST

what | 49 quintessentially shibuya sounding tracks from every which genre (except the overused nu-metal the fandom wants) blurb | encountered one too many threads about the forthcoming (incredible sounding) shibuya OST filled w "it’s not hard/aggressive-sounding enough to fit the arc"-discourse, which gave me a rash, bc music w/o screaming can also sound (&go) hard af. so that forced me to assemble all my finest genre finds under the category “aggressive/raw/claustrophobic/menacing sounding tracks”, ranging from electro/ebm/breaks/idm → art pop/electronica/triphop → psychedelic rock & more. tldr here it is: the result of me being Affronted By Someone’s Musical Opinion On The Internet playlist → spotify (cont updated) tracklist | under cut

1. Identified Patient — Low Kust instr

2. Tricky & Martina Topley-Bird — Hell Is Round The Corner distant drums bring the news of a kill tonight  the kill which I share with my passengers  we take our fill, take our fill, take our fill

3. COUCOU CHLOE — WIZZ high—not the first time (shh)  high—not your last time (shh)

4. Tzusing — Gait instr

5. Martina Topley-Bird — Too Tough To Die derision’s a cold wind against my skin  you keep a-flayin’ til there’s no skin at all  what’s to hold it together when you stumble  and you fall

6. Labrinth — Nate Growing Up player, player put the money on it

7. Smoke City — Devil Mood I feel in a devil of a mood being instilled by the devil  wicked hot, brings me so much pain  and pleasure I can’t keep away

8. Massive Attack — Risingson now you’re lost and you’re lethal  and now’s about the time you gotta leave all  these good people; dream on

9. Portishead — Wandering Star those who have seen the needle’s eye now tread like a husk from which all that was now has fled  and the masks that the monsters wear  to feed upon their prey

10. The Herbaliser — The Sensual Woman instr

11. Vessel — Red Sex instr

12. Björk — Hunter I’m not stopping: I’m going hunting  I’m the hunter—I’ll bring back the goods 

13. Sofa Surfers — Hardwire psychic shrapnel  the ruin in me  I don’t want no heroes  cause someday you see the wire

14. Dollkraut — Rollercoaster instr

15. Nearly God, Terry Hall & Martina Topley-Bird — Poems forget the punk, I pack the funk  I’m gonna take a piece of you

16. Tristesse Contemporaine — Daytime Nighttime I just keep crashing, living on my rations the bullets and the roses, devil and the poses  don’t know where my ghost is; don’t know where my home is  guess we never chose this

17. Tzusing — 日出東方 唯我不敗 instr

18. Björk — Army of Me you’ll meet an army of me  army of me

19. Erik Lundin — Gold my sight aims on the horizon  through my pulse  and my temperature rising

20. Amnesia Scanner & Freeka Tet — Ledge instr

21. Tzusing — Residual Stress instr

22. The Prodigy — Breathe breathe the pressure come play my game, I’ll test ya psychosomatic, addict, insane

23. Caterina Barbieri — Memory Leak instr

24. Radiohead — The National Anthem everyone is so near  everyone has got the fear  it’s holding on

25. UNKLE & Thom Yorke — Rabbit In Your Headlights fat bloody fingers  are suckin’ your soul  away, away, away

26. Queens of the Stone Age — “You Got A Killer Scene There, Man…” what’s the fuckin’ difference, we all gonna die  you gonna do something killer?  c’mon, give it a try

27. Paul Kalkbrenner — Gebrünn Gebrünn instr

28. Underworld — and the colour red dark charge  no, no, no dark  charge  no, no, no

29. Tricky & Martina Topley-Bird — Black Steel I’m not a fugitive on the run  but a brother like me began to be another one  public enemy servin’ time, they drew the line y’all  they criticize me for some crime 30. Justice — Genesis instr 31. Alice In Chains — Would? am I wrong? have I run too far to get home?  have I gone? and left you here alone? 32. Mother Love Bone — This Is Shangrila so don’t you die on me, babe  don’t you die on me  ‘cause love is all good people need

33. Linkin Park — Faint I can’t feel the way I did before  don’t turn your back on me, I won’t be ignored  time won’t heal this damage anymore 

34. Labrinth — Mount Everest I burn down my house and build it up again  (tell ‘em)  I burn it down twice just for the fun of it (tell ‘em)

35. Vince Staples & Snoh Aalegra — Jump Off The Roof highway to hell and I’m speeding one way to tell if I’m breathing  on three let’s jump off the roof

36. Blawan — Body Ramen instr

37. David Holmes presents The Free Association — Le Baggage rise (rise, rise) rise above ground

38. Nearly God & Björk — Keep Your Mouth Shut better keep your mouth shut, babe  next to your chest  better keep your mouth closed, baby  and keep it close to your chest

39. The Dead Weather — 60 Feet Tall I know it ain’t easy  I must tap your evil well  boy, you come roaring like a bat out of hell

40. Giant Swan — Boasting instr

41. Screaming Trees — Shadow of the Season the hour is ending, can’t you see  there is no way now to get free  in the shadow of the season without a reason to carry on

42. Underworld — Bruce Lee bullet got the wrong bloke but he don’t die anyway  it’s nothing mortal but he don’t move

43. Amon Tobin & MC Decimal R. — Verbal instr

44. Massive Attack & Young Fathers — Voodoo In My Blood voodoo in my blood is livid  blood take, I’m chillin’, chill me  got the soul of a mimic  sign of the wars is my grinning

45. Blawan — Under Belly instr

46. Massive Attack & Roots Manuva — Dead Editors ‘cause to live or to die for  we all search for some kind of truth

47. Gonjasufi — Your Maker (Daddy G Remix) is anyone else tired from working on a spaceship?  from walking on a wire?

48. Labrinth — Gangster instr

49. Tzusing — 戴綠帽 (Wear Green Hat) instr

[contemplativewomaniya]

I was writing exam.. the invigilator ( a man) was standing beside my desk pulling up his pants again and again and fixing something near crotch :/, repeatedly! Weird af... Apparently he did it just near girls?

Idk if he genuinely was struggling with some rash or his new undergarments or whatever ORRR he was trying to be an arse? I mean, if you have uneasiness down there ask for some substitute during exam for a few mins so you can go to washroom to fix it? Better to ignore..

[a-cosmic-mess]

15/12/23

I'm so relieved. The bookshop just "fired me" and I'm overjoyed! I need to listen to my gut man. Oh, and a new life rule: Don't ever make a rash decision again! Ever since I almost lost this opportunity once (about a month or so ago) and practically grovelled to get it back, I've carried this weight with me. I never knew it until now, until being freed from it. I'm stoned af, and this is the most successful high I've had in a few weeks - apparently there is a mental block in my head that prevents me from getting high, or horny, actually. I havent been interested in weeks too. But like I said, I'm stoned, I'm so high and I just had an awesome orgasm....and suddenly the fog cleared lol.

I've never felt so free and clear, its genuinely like I've entered a new plane, I've had an epiphany ...a breakthrough. Its insane how one wrong decision influences evrthing. Like, I can get high, I can have orgasms and I feel like I can actually DO something, you know? Drawing, reading whatever. I don't feel like I'm in decision paralysis.

Its no wonder science reckons the stomach is like an intuitive second brain. I've felt intuition before, but I've never had it so blantly and intensely. I dread to think what would have happened to me if I'd actually stayed there. I was gonna have a nap today, but I feel great! I havent been sleeping great recently - guess I know why now. I hope I sleep better, and I hope this feeling sticks around. Cuz it would be great if the reason I'm a shitty human being was because of that lol

Fantastic - Blame my Youth

[444namesplus]

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[andromedaexists]

🩸🔦 Have some more horror asks for Icarus, because why not?

welcome back bitch <3 (affectionate)

🔦 - would your character go investigate that spooky noise? the local ghost story? cryptid? that rash of murders in town?

I fully believe Icarus would just roll over and ignore spooky noises. Like, he's got chronic sleeby the mans isn't even gonna think twice before ignoring a spooky noise. However, he's also impulsive as fuck and a nerd and would go running to chase down local folk tales and cryptids

🩸 - if confronted with a monster, would they romance them, befriend them, fight them, run away, kill them? something else?

I think Icarus' first instinct would be torn between wanting to kill a monster and wanting to seduce it. Like, Icarus is all for monster fucking and would absolutely go head first into flirting with a monster but also he has voices in his head that are bloodthirsty af and those would tell him to kill it

however the real truth comes in there: Icarus would seduce them through fighting. He just would lmao he'd be delivering the killing blow and going to [redacted] the monster and would [redacted]

[lanomin]

Extremely long vent about skill drain in my field and also just gushing about small parrots, because that really is my whole life these days

idk man the skill drain at work is so real and it really sucks ass that I'm going to be a part of that and leave (probably) before the other keepers have worked here more than a year, other than my supervisor. I've been here for 4 years and haven't had a consistent team for more than 1 year. Like it kills me to be a part of that now, and I know it's not my fault that we're skeleton crewed to hell and underpaid and tired af and my boyfriend has gone through hell out here for pretty much 4 years and we need to leave for his physical/mental health...but I'm trying as hard as I can to show my coworkers every little bit of information before I go, but I know it won't be enough. I've seen it enough times and I remember what it was like being new, there's things I just wouldn't have known/had the confidence to do if I hadn't just physically been here for 4 years, and that's not something I can really teach. Like just being able to keep an eye on birds being off/knowing random specific repairs and cleaning techniques/keeping an eye out for blood in random spots/hearing stories from other keepers to be applied later. Like if I hadn't heard a random story from my old coworker 3 years ago about birds losing their voice being a sign of aspergillosis I wouldn't have known to even look out for that! And now it's happened I'm like fuck there's so many random small things that just don't come up, until they do. It's one thing to you know tell new employees all these things, but they just don't fully click until you've been around and seen it happen. And it's the worst on the animal care side of things because things are going to get missed, things are going to drop in quality and probably not pick back up for a while. I hate that the zoo field does this to people, because even though I also despise Nashville/Tennessee in general the zoo is a really lovely haven in the middle of this gray concrete nightmare, and the people here are really cool and unique and so passionate about biology. And the birds, oh my birds. Fuck man these birds really have me considering staying in goddamn tennessee bc I love them so much. I've 100% literally put my blood sweat and tears into taking care of them. I've seen them hatch I've seen them die in my hands I've seen them grow from the size of a quarter looking like a piece of chewed up gum into a real bird that's so beautiful with so much personality. Being able to hold a bird in your hand is like one of my favorite feelings ever, the lorikeets are so soft and funny and they love to wrestle so much. And having that trust, seeing that these smart small parrots will let you play with them (and even want you to play with them!) and trust you won't hurt them is unbeatable. But to get here I've really been through hell. At this point I've worked more 12-14 hour no break days than I can count, I've worked through -14° nights and 114°+ days. My hands are scarred and cracked year round, my legs are covered in bug bites and heat rash and bruises. I've truly grown numb to being shit on by birds. But I love how much I've grown here. I love feeling confident in my skills, remembering how nervous I was in 2019 and wondering if the birds would ever warm up to me like with my older coworkers. Now having handraised the last 2 gens of babies it feels so good to have these birds that know me, and I know them, and they come to greet me in the morning and wrestle in my hair and on my shirt. Leaving them is going to be gut wrenching for so many reasons, but I can't live out here seeing my bf so miserable. He's sacrificed so much coming out here, and we have to start our lives together but it's hard seeing your favorite place fuck you and your coworkers over so hard in the name of profit for admin paychecks and endless expansion.

Also being what feels like the last person in TN taking covid seriously is not fun, and does help lessen the pain of leaving.

Idk the summer is flying by and the plan is to potentially at least leave the job in December/January, and the clock is ticking faster than I want it too. But I also want it to get here soon so my bf can finally start his career path too, and start to be happy. And I'll have to cope with leaving with just trying to share as much info as I can, pass along every scrap of knowledge/skill I've picked up in the last 4 years as the best thing I can do for the birds now