#messages from cardiff

[stochastique-blog]

Love me

Abandoned house, Lake Road West, Roath Park.

[the-winds-of-destiny-xxx]

.

[crescenthistory]

omg congratsss on 2k!!! could i request prompt 31 from the dialogue list with remus? i’m just thinking about oblivious rem… like she’d be flirting with him in EVERY possible opportunity and he’s just like oh she’s the sweetest to me we have such a nice friendship😭

thank you so much for participating, lovely! unfortunately i evidently don't know what a drabble is, so i hope you enjoy this one-shot lol<33

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i will ARGUE for prompt 31 "give me a kiss, you beautiful idiot" with remus lupin

carina's 2k celebration

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cw: gn!reader, oblivious!remus, uk university au, background prongsfoot, disabled!remus, remus is taller than you because he is taller than everyone, physical affection, remus pov, did i make rem a history student? yes i did, sue me

wc: 3.7k 

Remus was beginning to fear he might be slightly foolish.

This whole exam season he had existed solely by your side, attached at the hip with the strongest stitch a sewing needle could provide. This brand of existence had not come as too big of a surprise to either of you – nor to your respective friends from your hometowns that you updated over messages and the occasional video call.

When Remus made the decision to go to a university far away from all his friends and family, he had been silently cursing himself for it the whole while. This university in the middle of nowhere had an excellent arts and humanities faculty that specialised in the perfect niche intersection between history and literature that Remus had always been so infatuated with. After the confidence instilled in him by his best mates from boarding school and the reassuring kisses from his painfully aging parents, Remus knew he had to go.

It was now or never for him. Give it a few years, he would want to be back home with his Mam and Tad, taking care of the farm and visiting his mates as they established families and developed their lives. This was his chance.

Yet, it ached to step away, an innate fear that had been hibernating for years rearing its head once more. Before his mates came into his life, Remus had believed himself incapable of forming meaningful connections. With his limb difference and autoimmune disorder, he had alway thought himself too different. Everything about him was odd, as he had been promptly informed on the playground one day and never forgotten. His gait was slower, his interests were peculiar, his arm looked different; Remus Lupin was surely doomed.

When, despite all odds, he found mates that didn’t just like him despite his oddities, but because of them – how could he have been stupid enough to leave them? 

“Just you wait and see, cariad,” his Mam, Hope, had whispered softly and patted his cheek as he hesitated to submit his application. “Surely if the world can produce those three lovely boys of yours, there must be more out there.”

His mother, Remus had come to learn, was consistently correct.

Because on the very first day of freshers’ week at a new university in a new town, into his life came you; so beautifully kind, so kindly beautiful, filled to the brim with an understanding, empathy and pure humour that he got drunk off of. One freshers’ week was all it took before he was fully swept into your life and friendships.

Much like how James had kindly adopted him on the train to boarding school, you picked him up and seemingly skipped the traditional “oh where is your accommodation”, “wow, how many siblings do you have?” and “no way, I did A-Level history too!” that he had come to expect and fear.

“You look like a palm tree in a snowstorm,” you had giggled after bumping into him. “Where’re you off to?”

Remus was unsure where he had been off to. He held his phone with the Welcome app opened, yet found it wholly unnavigable. “Uh, well. I don’t really know.”

Your smile had widened as you took him in. “What do you know, stranger?”

He had been practising how to answer the go-to questions and almost responded with “Oh, I’m Remus from Cardiff” when you threw him off. A warm feeling began to spread in his chest as he saw you sizing him up with zero judgement and all interest.

“I reckon just about enough to get through term, but a bit too little to get through freshers’.” A small giggle-like rumble had spread in his chest as he spoke, red nerves climbing up his neck in case you had intended the question differently.

You luckily hadn’t. “Perfect!” you announced with a grin. “I know enough to know you don’t get through fresher’s, you just go with the flow. So you can tag along with me, pretty boy.”

Remus never did stop tagging along with you. Only later that day, when you introduced him to your friends, did you learn each other’s names, too caught up in talking about anything and everything else. It went from being a nerve-racking day to a freeing one.

Your little pack of quickly-found friends welcomed Remus with enthusiasm to match yours, and together you made your way through your first week and then your first year at your middle-of-nowhere university. Though he enjoyed your little pack – named Alice, Frank, Emmeline and Dorcas, all of which he wanted to introduce to his friends back home – you were the one who stood out to him through it all.

His sentiments must have been clear as he stayed in touch with his best mates online, because they kept asking about you and eventually for you. Remus answered the phone around you once and introduced you to James on speaker, and ever since then, they wanted him to rope you into any and all chats they had.

Remus didn’t really understand why they were so insistent, but he had a sneaking suspicion he didn’t want to know. 

Eventually, realisation was forced to dawn on him, as all your friends went home for a bit when classes ended for a long assessment season, while only you and Remus stayed behind on campus. Alice lived with Frank’s family, who were only a short drive away, while Emmeline’s parents were loaded enough to fly her in and out whenever she had a free weekend, and Dorcas took any opportunity to jump on her Harley and disappear for a while. Once it was just you and Remus, alone in your designated corner of the ancient library, Remus’ skin began to tingle in a way he couldn’t explain away.

And thus, the needle came out and stitched you together effortlessly and intrinsically. 

If one of you were at the library, so was the other. If one wanted to go grab a bite mid-study session, so did the other. And, if Remus was called up by his friends, so were inadvertently you.

“Moony? Sunshine? You there?” Sirius’ voice sounded through the speakers on Remus’ laptop as he hastily lowered the volume. You were the only ones in this corner of the library, but sound might travel, he thought. You snorted as you looked at his stress for a second before turning to Sirius.

“We’re right here, Pads,” you teased as you turned the camera on, which Remus had forgotten to do.

“Ah, there! My eyes have been blessed.” His best mate’s voice was a bit static-y through the microphone, but Remus had grown used to that over the months. “Are you lovebirds still nesting in that library of yours?”

Remus’ brows furrowed as he swallowed uncomfortably over the blush already creeping up his neck. You beat him to answering it.

“I don’t know, are you lovebirds still living the life of luxury in Potter Manor?” you quipped back, raising an eyebrow at Sirius’ pixelated form. Remus felt oddly pleased with how well you seemed to know his friends through only talking over the phone.

Sirius’ shared his sentiments but expressed them in a wholly different manner – through a gasp. “How dare you insinuate that my affections towards James Fleamont is anything beyond brotherly?”

At that, James’ curly hair appeared in the doorway behind Sirius as he threw a t-shirt at his head. “Shut up, Sirius.” He laughed heartily before crouching down enough to see you and Remus. “Hi nerds! How’re you? Coming home soon?”

“God forbid someone prepares for the exam they spent all their money and braincells on getting to take,” Remus joked, knowing that James wouldn’t point out that most of the money that had gone towards Remus’ degree was Potter money. 

“Don’t worry James, I’ll ship him off to you soon.” You elbowed Remus to emphasise your point, but then smoothly slipped your arm behind his back to rest your hand between his shoulder blades. Remus physically relaxed. 

“No, no, he’s yours now babes, you just keep him,” James spoke as he walked restlessly about the room behind Sirius, who was very obviously ogling him, “but both of you please come visit as soon as you’re done with exams, yeah?”

You just smiled warmly and nodded, while Remus felt his flush creep up further. He thought this was probably a good point to cut his friends off before they took it too far and made you uncomfortable.

“What are you doing now, then? Considering you don’t seem to be dedicated to your own exams?” He shifted the conversation, instead allowing his best mates to talk at the two of you as you settled into your seat beside Remus. His skin warmed beneath his clothes where you kept your arm around him and eventually rested your head on his shoulder – in a way that couldn’t be explained away by mere physical contact.

The hour ebbed out as the lot of you went back and forth, trading life updates and stories cheerfully, pleased to leave your reading lists be for a little while. Eventually, Sirius began telling a story from their old boarding school days that involved a certain infamous Marlene that made your grin widen.

“We really should introduce Marlene to our friend Dorcas at some point,” you said, looking at Remus to see his opinion even as you seemingly spoke to Sirius. “It seems they would be a good match.”

Remus grinned, looking down at his lap before meeting your eyes. “Been thinking the same thing as of late.”

“Where’s Dorcas now?” James asked intriguingly.

“Oh, she’s off riding her bike for a while.” You waved your hand as if to say she’s just like that.

Sirius whistled and patted James on the back. “Sounds right up Marls’ alley.”

“You would be the one to know, considering you’re the only one of us who’s been up Marls’ alley.” Even as James spoke, he began to shield his body, seemingly prepared for the way Sirius would begin swatting at him.

“Prongs, we snogged once in year four to figure things out – it’s really time you let this go.”

Remus couldn’t help but snicker, which made you laugh and made Sirius narrow his eyes at him all at the same time. 

“Seems like that university of yours is where everyone meets their soulmates, then,” Sirius said in a concerningly smug tone. “If Marlene’s other half has finally been found and yours, Moony, is–”

Remus cut him off with a nervous laugh, waving him off. “Speaking of soulmates, how’s Lily doing, James?” His voice was a bit too high-pitched as he pointedly stared only at Sirius and not at you, whose gaze he could feel caressing his cheek. He hoped the look he gave Sirius read as sorry, shut up, here’s some ammunition.

Luckily, his friend took the bait, albeit only after a wolfish grin sent his way and what looked like a wink aimed at… you. “Yes, how is little Red?” Sirius asked, jumping on Remus’ diversion as James groaned.

“Happily engaged to Mary, as you know, Sirius.” James had apparently been eager to dish out old embarrassing stories of childhood crushes but not receive them. “We’ll see her next week at Peter’s.”

Remus laughed lightly as he looked at the two boyfriends quarreling in a manner only the two of them could ever pull off, never once turning his head to meet your gaze that still didn’t feel aimed in the same direction as his.

James and Sirius’ voices kept bouncing off the aging stone walls that surrounded you, creeping in between the pages of the books on the shelves. Remus enjoyed it – until you yawned. It was quiet, understated, but at last made Remus’ gaze smoothly sweep over to you, skin around his eyes crinkling at what he found. The smile on your lips was genuine as you took in the conversation, but your eyes had a glassy look to them that Remus had come to know as a tell-tale sign that it’s time to resign for the night. You stretched your neck a little after your yawn, as if the muscles there were ailing you, and Remus had half a mind to reach out and massage any aches away, if that had not been wholly unhinged of him.

Instead, he cleared his throat slightly and looked over at James and Sirius’ images on the screen. It was a sound they were well used to from years of dorming together and made nostalgic – yet no less mischievous – grins break out on their faces.

“Want to get rid of us already, Moons?” Sirius teased, but even he was beginning to look a tad bit tired, in that way only his friends would be able to decipher. 

“Yes, I am beyond bored with you both.” Remus’ tone was sarcastically monotonous until he could no longer hold back his smile. “I want to go back to my blissful existence without your intervention.”

“Don’t be mean,” you faux chided as you swatted the shoulder you had been leaning against not long ago. 

James held one hand up in defense while the other seemed to point towards you. “You really should listen to your better half there, Rem.”

“We boring old friends won’t occupy your precious time together any longer,” Sirius added solemnly as he placed his hands placatingly on James’ shoulders to get him to drop his hands and look sideways with a grin. “Run off and do something wise with your time.”

Remus shook his head. “It was nice talking to you both.” He ignored the twinge in his heart at how much he meant it, all the while not being able to wish himself to be out of your company in favour of theirs. “We’ll see each other soon.”

“And speak sooner!” You added happily, seeming to have chirped up with renewed energy at the closing of the conversation. “I’ll bully him into calling you at least once more before exams.”

“What a blessing you are, darling.” Sirius held a thumbs up, which Remus felt was unnecessary. “Keep reining him in.”

“Okay, alright.” Remus fought back a chuckle and began waving to the camera. “Bye bye, guys. Goodnight.”

You echoed his sentiments, leaning into his side as you waved.

“Goodnight!” James called. “I’m sending you big goodnight kisses for when your lips aren’t occupied, Moon–”

Remus closed his laptop and cut off the connection before James – and, god forbid, Sirius – could make any further attempts at mocking him. He let out a sound that was a mix of a heavy sigh and a chuckle, letting his head fall forward to hit his laptop with a soft thud as he closed his eyes. “Good God.”

You just laughed quietly and patted his shoulder closest to you before getting out of your seat and, presumably, stretching. Remus decided to stay put with his eyes closed for that, to be on the safe side. “Your friends are a breed of their own. I really like them.”

“I’m glad you do.” Remus turned his head sideways to peak up at you as you leisurely began to collect your things. “Ready to go home and sleep?”

You quirked an eyebrow at him in a manner that made him flush beyond his understanding. “Are you?”

He pushed any and all thoughts down as he forced himself up from the table with a sigh. “I am. I fear I can’t read another sentence, especially not if this historian is going to keep referencing Freud.”

“Which he will.” 

“I know,” Remus groaned. “Thus; let’s head out.”

You packed in relative comfortable silence, digesting the conversation and the day side by side. You helped Remus pack his pencils back in his pencil case and zipping it shut wordlessly, as always refusing any thanks. The smile you gave him as you did so was enough to make him want to thank you again anyway.

As you walked to the lift together, chatting idly, Remus allowed himself to bask in how close you seemed to always walk to him and how lucky he was to have made a friend as good as you.

James and Sirius’ comments remained in his brain, though, sifting around in a pond of increasing nerves about how you might have received and interpreted them. The thought of you getting home to your dorm and feeling uncomfortable or wary was enough to make him want to abandon his own ego and address it.

Despite the incoming spring, British weather remained stubborn, and thus the library was basked in a beautiful dusk, not quite pitch black, but enough for the yellow light streaming out of the windows while you walked past to seem mystical and magical. You walked together to the gates, just outside of which, you would have to part ways, Remus taking the left-turn and you the right.

Remus let you get right outside the black gates, but still on library property when he stopped, prompting you to do the same and look back at him with a curious gaze.

“I–” he began, a bit uncertain about how to word this. “Before you go, I just wanted to say I’m sorry.” A breath. “About Sirius and James. If they ever make you uncomfortable in any way, please just say so and I’ll get them to stop it, I swear. I don’t know what they’re getting at.”

You furrowed your brows a little, but not in a way that voiced upset – rather on the contrary, it’s the same furrow Remus often observes appears on your face right before he makes you laugh.

“What, those little comments earlier?” you asked, confusion and mirth warring in your tone.

Remus’ stomach dropped a little at the thought that you also picked up on it, but remained relieved that you didn’t seem overly upset. “Yes, I– they’re twats sometimes, you know, so please just pay them no mind. Boarding school kids with bad humour. I don’t know what they’re getting at.”

The corners of your lips began to curl upward as you took a step closer to him. Remus’ breath lodged in his throat at the action, however small. The poetic side of his mind would immortalise the image of you, tired and beautiful in the grey night and yellow light, smiling at him like your heart harboured a secret, even though he was close enough to feel it beating. 

“I know what they’re getting at.” You said it so simply, all you were missing was a shrug as the cherry on top. “I don’t mind.”

Remus had never enjoyed being compared to an animal, but he did recognise how his mouth opened and closed, not much unlike a fish. He couldn’t decide whether to ask you do? or you don’t? Instead, he asked, “What?”

“Do you mind?” Your eyes grew a shade more serious then, scanning his kindly. You reached out a hand to rest on his upper arm, squeezing it through his jumper and corduroy jacket.

It was Remus’ turn to look confused. “Well, I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.”

Yet again, you looked to be fighting a smile. “Yes, but do you mind?”

Remus thought that maybe, just maybe, he might be understanding what you just asked. He hoped he was not mistaken when he let out his whisper. “No.”

“Then give me a kiss goodnight, you beautiful idiot.” 

You spoke with such an endearing tone and smile, one that reassured him that you meant it but you were also not issuing a demand; it was you inviting him and teasing him at the same time. Just like a friend would, except Remus truly did not want to only be friends anymore.

Though there was no real need, Remus took a step closer to you and slowly lowered his face to meet yours, amber eyes staying on yours for as long as possible before your lips met, both sets curled up into matching smiles. His fingers came up to gently cup your cheek, fingertips gliding past your ear and into your hair, while his residual limb snuck around your waist, holding you close to him.

Remus kissed you and he realised that this is what he should have been doing all along. Remus kissed you and was grateful that this was the first time because it meant immensely more now than it ever could have before. Remus kissed you and he knew for certain that if he was an idiot, he wanted to be yours.

When you parted, he couldn’t stand pulling too far away, and kept you close to him by leaning his forehead against yours, tightening his hold on you. He didn’t open his eyes right away, instead breathing you in, melting into the memory of the moment.

Then, a wicked grin took over and he opened his eyes to find yours already looking at him with an affection he should have recognised sooner. “You think I’m beautiful?” he asked, and it sounded like humour but it felt deeper. 

“Stunning,” you whispered, tracing his cheek with your fingertips. Remus knew you were genuine.

“But still an idiot?” This time it was just humour.

“Oh, absolutely.” You laughed. “At least you know enough to get through exams.” He caught your reference and savoured it in his heart.

“I better, because I intend to finish this degree with you.” Remus dared to kiss your cheek, which almost felt more intimate. “As your idiot, right?”

You just nodded, with an expression that spoke volumes beyond words. “Yeah. Mine.”

Remus accepted in that moment that he had been more than slightly foolish. He couldn’t find it in him to regret it, though, as he decided to follow you all the way home in the darkening night.

[biancasaidstfu]

3 people who definitely will not miss each other's birthdays are CJ, NC and LN. Claudia correctly guessed Nic knew her birthday in the world tour interview last year, it wasn't a shock to her when the interviewer asked and she said of course Nic was the one who will know her birthday. Luke texted Nic 1st and gave her a gift, which he probably gave her before the actual birthday because 1) they had reshoots in Dec and 2) she also travelled to Cardiff to shoot Dr. Who. He knew he wasn't going to be with her on her day so he celebrated privately. Nic knows he likes peanut butter treats and they filmed on his birthday so she surprised him with that gift to make it special for him while they worked. This to me is more imPORNtant than a damn social media post or like. People don't need to touch grass alone they need to go and plant it too. The more time spent outside might do some good.

Social media has really fucked up the way people think how genuine relationships should be. I would hate if every private moment of mine and my friend groups is posted, it will take away from the true meaning and will seem performative. They're already performing for their jobs it's ok if they keep things private.

Social media posts and likes are for the public.

We are not meant to see what goes on behind closed doors.

So anyone tripping over no birthday post needs to go plant grass like anon said. If it's a desolate winter landscape like where I'm at, you can always buy a nice little indoor plant to touch on days where you feel like you're going nuts with no social media movement.

Nicola gave us a hint with her birthday message thanking people.

She made a point to tell us it was the 'loveliest' birthday and how 'lucky' she was.

[abyss-seer]

Where can you look for them?

PICK A CARD READING

Where all the boys at with emotional stability? Nice car, a CEO, and almost just as smart as me Where all the boys at with financial security? A doctor, a model, a man of possibilities They say, "Expectations are too high And you′ll never find a guy like that" It's driving you mad, honey They say, "That it′s just a waste of time Get your head out of the sky", but why? (Here we go) Oh, I, wish I could synthesize A picture perfect guy, oh, I, oh, I.....

Listen up, there's already saturation of lots of love reads on Tumblr, if this ain't for you, not for you, go away, walk away, find some other read, its not for you, let other people have their bit, pleeeeeeease.

Pile 1

Pile 2

Pile 3

This is going to be a mini read, about where the eff you will find your picture perfect guy/girl? They can be someone Karmic, Soulmate or Divine counterpart. Karmic doesn't mean I allow abusive energies, just fun people here to teach you your lessons. Now this can be your idealized person, doesn't mean the one you are supposed to have a happy ending with. But you know we have all wondered about him/her and their whereabouts. So Let's see what comes up

Pile 1

Girl I'll be honest I cleaned the space properly today, but the first hint that came for you is F.T. ISLAND, and when it came through I forgot where the eff F.T Island was but channeled Epstien's Island though I immediately dismissed it but after searching who F.T ISLAND was I was shocked to discover an involvement of it members in Burning Sun Scandal. I know this sounds crazy but he might be a memer or a troll of Pdfiles and grapists maybe because of his frustration that government does nothing. I clarified this message and got a message of a kind hearted or meek or very shy reserved yet confused and foolish soul that gets eaten by predators easily. They might have been a target or victim of many improper attacks against them by the people who have known them through and through and might have created rumours around them to succeed against them ,they had to leave their inner child or innocence behind unwillingly for it was forcefully taken away from them. They might have been a victim of such attacks, had abusive people like these in the workplace who might have made rumours about them. "If you gave me a chance I'll take it, its a shot in the dark but I'll make it". Oh my gosh this person understands the suffering of being in a miserable state so they help others through their disparity so they are a sort of a Vigilante maybe or may have been or they could be in the [process] a secret process of disproving these claims made against them. Woah girl, I feel you are gonna be that Mary Jane and other typical normal human girlfriend of some part time colleague, part time Avenger typa person. Good luck!

I am getting England or Gloucostershire or the town of Cheltenham, Churchdown, Newport, Cardiff or South England near the Bristol Channel. Places like Belgium, Netherlands, Luxemborg. Also I am getting Bay areas like South Carolina USA, and maybe Atlanta and Georgia, (USA). I feel like he might live in a native english speaking country, you might meet him around some bay area, shoreline or coastal area, bordered by huge bodies of water. You may hail from there, may work at these places or have a good shares, property or lands in these areas. I am also getting Western Yorkshire, and Manchester around the Bolton area. I was also getting an EFFBOY. Maybe you guys will meet when one of you isn't committed, also I am hearing a heartbroken sad song, so maybe one of you will get heartbroken or their trust is broken by the other person. I am also getting Brown eyed Girl by Van Morrison. So maybe they or you could have Brown or hazy brown eyes. You could be confident about meeting them only to remember this past pain or mistake in London, Boston especially for some of you. I feel like many of you can hail from Ireland, might or might not have seen this person before but you damn sure know about them. Maybe this a reconciliation for many of you choosing this pile. FKB or the German airport, Karlsruhe / Baden-Baden Airport could be significant. Maybe you will meet them or reconcile with them on grounded Kobe beef eating session. Coastal areas of Kuwait coming through.

Woah Pile 1, Bodak Yellow by Cardi B coming through, main character energy, easy going persona coming through

Pile 2

"Pittsburg is a city in Contra Costa County, California, United States." New Orleans, New Jersey. I also feel like you aren't going to find them far away from your hometown or homeland. You don't seem the type to move that much. They or you could work in CHP

California Highway Patrol (CHP):

The state law enforcement agency responsible for traffic safety and other duties on California highway

So I am literally getting an officer, maybe a fake officer for some of you. Idk but Iam also getting UMK Korea, Universal Music Group Korea, but I also channeled North Korea, so maybe some of you or they might be immigrants who have now settled and found work in South Korean Music Industry, or a part of movie industry. Doesn't mean one of those baseline jobs, seems something where they/you could be laying off people. They could be the one who built the foundations of their company, they could be lying to you about their job or the placeholding they might have in their company for a very very long time and might come off as a total stranger or fake police officer at the start maybe. Invasion of privacy? a threat? A very clean and hygienic energy, They do not like boundaries, are reckless, prone to accidents maybe, but are calm and collected about it, so yeah hard to connect with as they can be a Stray, like literally an orphan or someone who works with Stray Kids from JYP entertainment (just guessing cause UMK came through). So it can be hard to connect with them. Ok this is a very straightforward hyper independent person who doesn't likes being helped by others, their confidence or light literally dims when someone tries to help them, as they seem to associate it with their incapability. Their masculine energy is stronggggg!!!! Their socio-economic and cultural background might different than yours, maybe a little unpopular. I'm also hearing their previous person or relationship might have given them a draft or some public notice shaming them for their culture. "Culture vulture" might be term they were shamed with as a kid maybe. So someone who aren't that sure of their own abilities to hone in and master the skills of their ancestors and pass down this to the younger generations. Their biggest insecurity is their culture and their ancestory if so I may say that they aren't locked in to their culture and it hurts them to be like this. As a kid they used to be fat-shamed as Bao Bao, Dumplings, Samosa, Petu Raaj (Chubby King), Phatty. I think as a grown up it hurts them a lot. I think they might meet you while they are getting over their ex and might tempt you for becoming their rebound.

They might have a child from their prev marriage. While they might be onto that rebound, don't worry they will tell you the truth, it maybe a reunion to some of you, you might know them from before somewhere and might remember them. They might not know that though. And I think once communication starts its a rollercoaster ride for both of you.

Goodbye, this ain't Nasty 18+ read, you 2 dirty minds, at first this feels like a situationship which turns into something more, you will know when its official, like literally, you will sense a ring way before the proposal day comes. You might go on fishing trips with their child with chum buckets and what nots. Aquarius, 11th house and Uranus energy coming through. Best believe they might be an Alienic or ( have Alien-icks in bed )to your culture, religion, belief systems and what nots. "I just feel like going abroad and kissing someone's p*ssy" Ok pile 2 your person's dirty AF. Bye, to both of you

Pile 3

Unholy by Sam Smith coming through, Right off the bat lemme tell you, Body Shop or a club or a bar. Pick your poison. This pile gives off ick towards polyamorous relationship but maybe they are in a phase of dating one

France, Paris, Italy, Latin American coming through. London, Córdoba,Spain coming through as well.

This place in Spain especially coming through like clouds and the rain, I'll follow you everywhere

Dirt Bikers coming through, they could be the mountain biking type. The anime Idaten Jump comes through, just like sam's unholy opening you could meet them in a mechanics shop or something. They could be a mountaineer. Nick DiGiovanni and Italian Tiktok chef Fabrizio Pigliucci, the " bon appetito betch" guy comes to mind. He could a very sporty individual, cooking his own meals, very reserved and conservative in his mindset, someone's whose mind is rooted to their culture but also someone loud, sporty or atheletic. They can have Quinceanera in their tradition as well, they were the type to look for trad wife. I guess you have already met your picture perfect guy and are someone with a good set of future standards for men, after meeting them. This man roves on a KTM RC, trust me, this is a biker.

Another Channeled place : Fuente Obejuna,

This guy/girl of yours is somewhere around the Andalausian plains, Girl go and find him. Who is he? Even I am curious, dude's been moving me to all the places in Córdoba, Bro lives somewhere around here maybe, or somewhere around the southern Andalausian region, The place he could hail from could be south west of Corodba. For some (since this pile seems a bit like general read for me, beaches of California, or a place whose name could start with And______

but Spain coming through significantly).

He could be someone with Famas gun or Loves Famas guns in Online battle grounds, I'm also getting the word "sinking". You both might meet while online player based games, and some of you may find him sinking through a well, or something about "Famas Original" coming through. Idk who this dude is, but there are many people behind your person.

I had to literally hold a Tiger's eye stone to weed out excess energy. Also these people who could be chasing them aren't their type. I'm literally getting "I just wanna be yours" by Arctic Monkey's Wanna be yours. Babe you will know this person the moment he lays his eye on you, cause this dude's type to rush behind the highest or the trendiest stuff of the day. And you could be that! They might have a store filled with glamorous stuff, very high end as well. They like to maintain their collections and have very high and classy aura about them. They are someone who's very show off, and babe they love to show you off as well. This dude literally reminds me of Roland, Japan's richest Host and dang you are their person. This person loves you and keeps you like a little keepsake, according to them and their love language, you are an arduous reminder of something they struggled with in their life and have now succeeded and overcome it due to all the failures they face. You could have been there for them or will or might enter into this person's life in this little phase. Their love language can be a bit show offy but they will love you for who you are as well. They just love admiring and adoring you. The love they provide might not be so intense but its joyous and playful according to me and some of you might literally enjoy that.

I am kinda getting that they could be someone like Jennie Kim from Blackpink. Kinda Roar, Kinda Kinky, Kinda Slayy, Kinda Sassy all at the same time. 12:12 on the clock, they can appear a bit fishy, or suspicious but are a cutie patootie inside. This pile literally gives off Goth, Gangsta person yet a cutie pie when it comes to love.

Be careful of Public smex, PDA's and what not cutesie stuff. You might by mistakely walk in on them in Bathroom for some of you.

8th house air placements, 8th house mercury, they are good with their dirty talk, you might fluster over their words. I'm channeling "web of words". Dude this person's confusing though. They can have soul karmic ties with you. You might have to teach him a lesson gurl, cause this looks like a situation-ship or a hookup to me. His words are so much like Ranveer Allahbadia, like he might say that he is interested in something but is actually someone who makes fun of those very hobbies and creative expressions that they say they like. If this is 8th house mercury synastry let me telll you, people with these synastry placement, the mercury person might gossip about the house person's private life and that ain't right, usually 8th houser suffer a lot with their privacy being invaded by this synastry so be careful who you share your life with, let the cat get your tongue if possible, your instincts might be trying to protect you.

Though for some of you, this is a soulmate or a love mate, perfect partner right here, they'll be close to your family or other partner if this is Polyamorous relationship, maybe brown for some of you here, will have greater intellect and will help you through your family finances and property dealings, a lawyer for some of you. They are cutthroat and deep (might literally be so in a oral smex sense). Maybe you had met them in the past and grew something together only for them or you to get dissatisfied and bored out of it and leave this relationship or business dealing or many of you decided to open the relationship and let new options in and basically after a long while of thinking and wondering maybe you guys had let go of each other. But I think there's some future fated meeting awaiting you all. The next choice is yours babe

[doctorwhogirlie]

Every Bad Wolf Reference

The End of the World: The Moxx of Balhoon tells the Face of Boe that being trapped on the exploding Platform One is the classic Bad Wolf scenario

The Unquiet Dead: Gwyneth the parlour maid looks into Rose’s mind and sees The Big Bad Wolf

The Aliens of London: A child graffiti’s Bad Wolf onto the side of the TARDIS

Dalek: Eccentric billionaire Henry van Statten has the security call sign ‘Bad Wolf One’

The Long Game: In the year 200,000 there’s a TV channel called Bad Wolf TV

Fathers Day: ‘Bad Wolf’ is scrawled across a 1980s club poster

The Doctor Dances: The missile about to land on the Chula spaceship has ‘Schlechter Wolf’ written on it

Boom Town: The nuclear power station about to destroy Cardiff is called ‘Blaidd Drwg’.

Bad Wolf: The Doctor, Rose and Jack return to Satellite 5, this time known as the Game Station run by the Bad Wolf Corporation

The Parting of the Ways: The message is written around Rose’s council estate

The Parting of the Ways: Rose takes the words from the Bad Wolf logo and scatters them through time and space

Tooth and Claw: The werewolf mentions that Rose has seen the wolf too, and that there is something of the wolf about her

Love & Monsters: Evidence of Rose has been corrupted by a Bad Wolf virus

Doomsday: Rose says goodbye to the Doctor at Bad Wolf Bay

Gridlock: Japanese word Akuro, translates as bad wolf - Poster in one of the cars

Silence in the Library: A painting of a Wolf and Rose

Turn Left: Bad Wolf messages are left everywhere, a warning to the Doctor

The Day of the Doctor: The Moment refers to itself as Rose Tyler, the Bad Wolf

Source

[pandorasprongs]

INTERLUDE | are we still friends?

'it's nice to have a friend' fic masterlist + playlist | previous chapter

PAIRING: jamie tartt x fem!reader

WORD COUNT: 3.2k

SUMMARY: after months of ghosting, reader finally gets to talk to jamie again at the end of her second year.

WARNINGS: language

A/N: so we're going back in time to when reader's in uni and early in jamie's man city career :) hope u all enjoy! (also i know frats aren't a thing in the uk but i didn't find that out till after i published the prologue rip) i'd also suggest listening to 'are we still friends?' by tyler the creator for this chapter too just for the vibes — also!! thank you so much for 200 followers it's insane so many of you enjoy my fics :))

Age 19

"And that's it for this semester! Congrats everyone!" Your professor greets the room as the last person finishes their presentation. The room cheers, — albeit weakly given that most of the students there were coming down from their finals week caffeine addiction, — and everyone soon starts filing out.

You pass by your professor on the way out with Liv and hand her the trinket that the two of you planned on giving out to all of the professors you've had this semester. Some out of gratitude, some to make them feel guilty for the low marks they've given. This certain professor, a lady in her mid-40s who has been in the STEM area of research for years, had designated the two of you her favorites.

"Thank you so much, ladies. It was such a pleasure having the two of you in my class." You both give her a warm smile before heading into the hall. 

When you make it outside of the building, Liv lets out a cathartic scream of relief. "It's finally done!" You laugh at your friend's reaction. You were glad too, but not enough to yell in public.

As you headed back to your student hall, you pulled out your phone. It had become routine to message Jamie every time you were heading back to Manchester, which you were the next week when your parents picked you up.

Hey Jamie! How've you been? How's Man City? Saw the match with Cardiff, you did great.

You press send before adding on, If you're still here, maybe you want to meet up before you go back? I'm heading back to Manchester next week too if you want to meet up then instead. 

You send that too and type out I miss you, but after glancing at the rest of your unread messages, you delete it and sigh in defeat.

You don't even know why you're still trying. You haven't spoken to Jamie in months. No, it's almost been a year. The last time you did was when you went home for the summer holiday after your first year of uni, but even then, Jamie seemed distant and cold. He left the lunch early too after he got a call from his manager, much to your dismay. Even before that, his messages to you were getting less and less frequent till he finally stopped replying a few months into your second year.

Maybe it stung more knowing it was around the time you left that you realized how really felt about him. It wasn't just platonic love anymore; you might've actually been in love with your best friend then. But those feelings have since disappeared, at the same rate that Jamie disappeared from your life.

So now you were in a pub, supposedly celebrating the end of your second year in uni, but you couldn't stop staring at your phone, waiting for a reply. You've been re-reading your message to him and staring at that delivered in the corner until you finally broke out of the trance thanks to one of your friends calling out to you.

"Oi! You're not even tipsy. Are you playing or not?" Tina asks and you shut your phone before shifting your focus to the conversation. Right, you're playing Never Have I Ever.

"Shit, sorry," you apologize before lifting your hand. "I am now. What's the last one?"

"It was never have I ever slept with a footballer," Liv explains quickly, but the entire group had this knowing look on their faces that told you everything they thought of you.

Maybe it was fueled by the anger directed at said footballer or the fact that you knew they all thought you were a prude for not having hooked up with anyone the whole time in uni, — as far as they knew, — but you give them a knowing look that caused everyone's expressions to shift.

"No fucking way, you have?" Sam asks and you take a shot as confirmation.

"Technically yes," you explain but decide to hide which player it was. Because if they knew it was one of the up-and-comings of the Premier League, you'd never hear the end of it. Plus, one of them was bound to snitch to a newspaper for sure. "Back when I was 17 and before I left for uni, I slept with someone who ended up getting scouted." You neglect to mention that someone was your best friend, who agreed to be your first time because you were sure you'd make a bad decision the moment you stepped foot in a uni.

If they knew where you were from, they would've figured it out instantly. But you didn't have a Mancunian accent and none of them had ever bothered to ask where you were from over these two years — except Liv, who was no longer paying attention to the whole game and just scrolling on her phone, — so you were basically in the clear.

They moved on from your grand revelation quickly and continued with the game. At the end of it, you were probably the most sober out of all of them, so you ordered a Cosmopolitan. Maybe alcohol led to bad decisions, but at least it kept you off your phone.

You continued to talk with your friends till Tina gasped. You all turn to her to ask what happened when she exclaims, pretty loudly, "Looks like all of us have a chance at checking 'hooking up with a footballer' off our lists tonight." She giggles before leaning back into her seat.

You join the rest of them to look at what Tina had just seen and realize that not one, but two teams' worth of players had just walked into the pub. From Cardiff City and... Man City.

You already feel your heartbeat quickening and your eyes instantly start looking for Jamie in the crowd. The thoughts of 'he has to be here,' and 'he can't be here,' battle it out in your head, but when your eyes finally land on your former best friend, you don't know if the butterflies in your stomach are a good thing or not.

"Well, fuck it." You hear one of the girls you're with say as she downs another shot and gets up from the table. Some of the others join her in the group, but you're still frozen from nerves. Best way to heat up? More cocktails.

You watch with the other girls from a distance as the braver ones take their chances with the footballers on the other side of the bar. But for most of it, you can't take your eyes off Jamie. 

He looks really different, like bad different. He's loud and boisterous, but not in the way he was before. You watch how he talks to his teammates and you can almost see how his overconfidence masks the level of insecurity he has with much older players. Or maybe you're overthinking it. You haven't seen him in a while.

When your friends get back to the table along with some new drinks and stories, you try and listen intently. But you really couldn't stop looking behind them.

You don't think Jamie's felt your eyes on him, so you weren't worried he'd turn and see you staring. But if he did, you wondered how he'd react. Would he go wide-eyed and stare back or just look away as if he didn't just spot his best friend of a decade at a pub? You were about to find out.

After downing one of the drinks in front of you, — you weren't even sure if you were the one who ordered that one, to be honest — you excuse yourself from the table. When they saw where you were walking over to, they decided to start cheering. It did help your nerves, even though you were approaching them for different reasons.

"Jamie!" You get his attention and the moment his eyes land on yours, shock fills his face. You almost scoff at that. He goes to the place where you're studying and assumes that he wouldn't run into you?

You didn't even plan out what you were going to say, so instead you sarcastically greet, "Nice to see you here. In Cardiff. Where I go to uni."

Jamie doesn't say anything and just continues to stare at you. His cocky facade almost slips too, till one of the other Man City players rests his arms on Jamie's shoulders and he suddenly tenses. You've seen him before, probably in one of those tabloid articles, judging from his overall demeanor. He seemed like the type to get into those scandals.

"Ah fuck, I thought we got rid of you lot already. Don't you have enough drinks from your friends over there?" George, you finally remembered his name, states and you're taken aback. He must've seen you coming from that direction.

"No, I'm not here for that." You answer bluntly before turning back to Jamie, starting to get annoyed. "Are you seriously not going to say anything?" 

The Jamie you knew would be the first to defend you, even if it was just over someone knocking into you in the halls or stealing your pens. But it wasn't that you were after, honestly. You just wanted him to say something, anything at all.

"You know her, Tartt?" George scoffs and looks at Jamie. When Jamie continues to stay silent and just looks down at his feet, he chuckles and nudges the younger footballer. "A past hook-up, huh? Judging by your reaction. No need to be embarrassed, Jamie," he glances back at you and tries to whisper, "She's quite fit. Well, by your standards."

You roll your eyes, the anger starting to bubble. Now, Jamie had to say something right? But seeing no reaction, you correct him yourself. "Look, I'm not one of his bitter exes. I'm his..." You actually don't how to end that sentence.

George takes advantage of your pause and by now, some of the footballers around them had turned their attention to the scene. "Look woman, I don't care who you are to him, but take. the. fucking. hint."

You still don't remove your eyes from him. "Jamie," you whisper, almost pleading at that point.

Jamie looks up and seeing the multiple eyes on him at the moment, he finally speaks up, "You want an autograph or something? We're trying to enjoy our night, so I'll sign a napkin for you and you can be on your way."

The coldness in his response causes you to stumble and you take a step back. What did he just say to you? You try and search his face for any sign of remorse or guilt. Something that says, 'Please don't hate me, I didn’t mean it.' Nothing.

The sounds of the other footballers laughing don’t help either; it only contributes to the rising feeling of heat and embarrassment in you. You can feel the tears starting to form. There's no reason for you to break down in front of all of them, so you answer quickly, "Right. No need. Sorry for disturbing your night." 

You turn around quickly, but not without hearing George ask Jamie who you were. For a second, you almost thought he'd give him the truth.

"Dunno, probably some fan I met before." That breaks the dam and the first few tears drop to your cheeks. A crying girl isn't an irregular sight at a bar, but you really didn't feel like staying in the same place as Jamie anymore.

You approach the table to grab your things when you notice that most of your friends had already scattered across the pub. The only one left there was Liv, — who was the designated driver for tonight despite your university being a 5-minute walk away — who notices your tear-stained face and is quick to rush over to you. "What's wrong? What happened?"

You shake your head. "Don't worry. I just want to head back." Liv hadn't even known you for two years, but she knew that you weren't one to talk about your feelings. Instead, she nodded and offered to help you out of the pub, but you shook your head once again. You had a relatively high limit and partner it with what just happened with Jamie, you were practically sober. You grabbed your clutch and coat before rushing out of the place, furiously wiping the teams from your face.

Fuck Jamie Tartt. Fuck those Man City losers. Fuck everyone involved in turning your best friend into whoever that was. The boy you once knew was gone. Fully and completely gone. You had to accept that.

But even then, you thought you'd hear the door open behind you. You thought it would be Jamie. You thought he'd chase after you. You thought he'd pull you into a hug. You thought he'd apologize for what he did and for everything. You thought he'd cradle your face as he did so. You thought he'd plant a tender kiss on your lips as an apology too. You thought he'd re-enter your life as if nothing had changed.

But he did none of that. 

And you went home alone.

—

"(Y/N)? It's Liv, again!" You hear from the other side of your door, but make no attempt to move from your position in your bed. It was just too comfortable, perfect for wallowing in when you've officially ended the longest friendship you've ever had. Liv continues, "I'm heading home soon, but I asked Donna if she could keep bringing food for you to your door till you head home."

You were touched by the gesture but knew you weren't going to touch any of those bags till late at night when the hall was completely deserted. Till then, you'd be sleeping. Your parents had delayed picking you up till the last day and you've never been more glad about that.

"See you next semester! Love you!" were Liv's parting words and once you heard her footsteps recede, you fell back to sleep.

In all honestly, you've lost track of time at that point. Yeah, it was pathetic sitting in your room as if you were mourning the death of a loved one, but it's not like anyone cared. Well, Liv did, which is why she started bringing you food when she realized you weren't leaving your room, but she was heading home to London. Your parents had no idea what happened and you intended to keep it that way. The rest of your friends were off with their own lives, not even giving you a second thought. Jamie sure as hell didn't care what happened to you. He made that clear.

So for the rest of your time left in the hall, you just stayed in your room. Like a hermit. Jamie would've found it funny, you thought once, till it caused you to burst into tears once again. The more you tried to forget Jamie, the more you thought of him, which was the worst loop you could be in.

He's even in your dreams. One of them felt so real because you were in your exact position in reality when your phone rang. You saw his name as the caller, but 'dream you' just pressed decline. Even deleted the missed call notification. Good for her.

Then, you wake up to a missed call and a text from your mom. On route to Cardiff! Can't wait to see you, sweetie. 

Ah, fuck. Had that much time really passed? You jumped out of your bed and start fixing up. Technically, you had 3 and a half hours to do so, but counting showering, cleaning up your suitcases from your dusty closet, and shoving almost a years worth of items into said suitcases, then you were in a bind and never prayed for traffic more in your life.

And from the sheer fear of your parents giving you a sermon in front of the entire building, you almost forgot about your former state of wallowing in self-pity. Then you were faced with taking down the decorations on your wall. 

There was a mix of everything from school banners, even flyers, and pictures you'd taken with your friends and parents. You started with those first until the only ones left were the ones related to Jamie. You had pictures with him from multiple stages of your life. There was one from the first football match of his you ever attended and one from your graduation, too. 

You had kept the note he made you when you were 16 and you joined your first individual debate tournament. ‘Fucking smash it!’ was scrawled in his handwriting on a post-it note, which you've hung on your wall since your first year of uni. 

Even the rings he used to buy you for your birthday till his mom told him to find something new. You slowly pulled them from your desk drawer and realized there were only four. One missing. They were old anyway. You end up shrugging it off and placing them into your suitcase.

When you started inserting the rest of the items into an envelope, you continue to look at that picture with Jamie from when you were seven. Suddenly overcome by an emotion — rage, pity, nostalgia, you're not really sure, — you crumple it with your two hands and hold it like that for a few seconds. 

You finally let go and see the two distorted faces, you're suddenly overcome by feelings of guilt. 7-year-old Jamie didn't do anything wrong; what was the point of taking your frustrations on a picture of him? Maybe you can throw darts at a printed photo of the current Jamie when you get home instead.

You flatten the picture as best you can before putting it back into the pile in the envelope. You finish packing your desk and place all the items into one of your suitcases. You look around the room, satisfied. Sure, your sheets weren't made yet, but you were going to leave the place anyway and you needed to shower. It was 40 minutes till your parents would knock on your door, — as seen in the picture they sent of the GPS — so it was more than enough for you to get ready.

Time passed by quickly and soon, your dad was helping bring your bags down to the car while your mom talked about how much weight you've lost while you were away, like they always did. 

"Oh! Jamie, he had a game against Cardiff last week, right?" Your dad remembers as he starts the car. You almost freeze at the name, but turn to look out the window to avoid your parents catching whatever expression you had on your face. You were too tired to mask it properly.

"Yes, he was amazing!" Your mom exclaimed before asking. "Georgie said she told him to meet up with you here. Did he?"

"No," you answered quickly. You never lied to your parents, which is probably why they accepted your response so easily. You don't look back at them and continue to look at the passing trees. "Must've been busy."

A/N: yeah... and there you go! here's what happened that night in the pub and hopefully it makes me much more clear why reader still holds something against jamie! we're going back to the present day timeline for the next one so stay tuned!

TAGLIST: @moonflowersandsparkles @faith-alons26 @rexorangecouny @aiyaiy @thegirlthatwantedtowrite @giggling-sewer-ginger @katdahlali @higherthanheroes @guccilongboard @alipap3 @rockchickrebel @ellietartt @shineforever19 @skewedcherries @jamietarttdodo @meg-ro @deepdarkvelvet @taytaylala12 @scaramou @rae4725 @oxxolovemelikeyoudooxxo (couldn't tag you for some reason?)

[bakerstreethound]

To Another Year

Relationship: Sherlock x lestrade!sibling reader

Warnings: mentions of fireworks, alcohol, Molly makes the briefest appearance, slight hints of jealousy, and Sherlock is a little grumpy

Summary: When the party for the new year begins at 221B, you reflect upon your year and the many blessings it's given you - that one of a new family, both blood and chosen.

All writings belong to me @bakerstreethound​ (Do NOT copy, repost, claim, or translate my works to other sites. I only publish here and on A03 under the same username) 

Word Count: 1.09k+

A/N: Happy 2024 everyone! Let's hope it's a good one. University has had me in a whirlwind this past semester and up to this winter course I'm on the tail end of. I hope to continue writing and posting more stories about our beloved detective. I know this is a few days, almost a week short of the new year, but it is Sherlock's birthday, so this works as a two-for-one gift. I sincerely hope you enjoy it. As always comments & reblogs are greatly appreciated. Huge shoutout to @strangelockd for beta reading and helping with the title! Graphic by @firefly-graphics

Mrs. Hudson rushed into the room, a bottle of champagne in one hand, the other holding a tray of sweets balanced precariously on the platter. You smiled, making your way over to help before John shoved you aside, taking the platter from her in stride. 

“Let me get that for you, Mrs. Hudson, ah yes these look swell!” John grinned, and you rolled your eyes, joining him as he popped a brownie in his mouth. 

You chuckled, biting into one as well, letting the warmth coat your tongue and suddenly you felt like a child again. “Oh, Mrs. Hudson you’ve outdone yourself truly. These are fantastic!” 

She chuckled while pulling out the glasses, clearing the table in the kitchen from the remnants of Sherlock’s experiments you’d cleared away, but somehow mysteriously popped up again.

You groaned in exasperation. You couldn’t remember the last time the kitchen, or the table for that matter had been clear of experiments or Sherlock’s current fixations. 

“Say, where is Sherlock?” John asked, taking another brownie from the tray. 

You shrugged, taking a sip from the champagne Mrs. Hudson handed you. “I haven’t the faintest idea. If he had any plans he didn't tell me.”

“Since when does he ever have plans other than dragging us along on cases?” John nudged you playfully and you sighed. 

“Sherlock always likes to go off and run around without regard to us,” Mrs. Hudson pipped in, taking a sip from her glass.” But that doesn’t mean we can’t have fun without him. Surely he’s bound to show up.” 

“Oh, I’m sure he will, he’s been on a few holiday cases up in Cardiff, from what Greg has told me,” you smiled. Speaking of the devil your phone buzzed and you moved with John and Mrs. Hudson to the living room where you promptly seated yourself in Sherlock’s chair, John following suit in his own while Mrs. Hudson sat on the couch you’d pulled closer to the chairs. 

You pulled open the text from your brother, your smile widening. Greg’s message was a selfie of him hauling a grocery bag, likely offerings for the party accompanied by an “on my way!” and a profuse apology for being late as Scotland Yard refused to close at a decent hour.

Well, a decent hour for Greg would be five, so he could sleep earlier and be to work at an even earlier time. Between the both of you, you’re more the night owl.

You take another sip of your drink, watching as John set up festive music on the telly, and opening the curtains where you were met with a rich dark sky littered with stars, the moon glowing softly. You admire the sight and you can’t imagine anything better than this or anywhere you’d rather be. 

Your phone buzzed again, met with another text from Greg. Make sure to keep Sherlock in line. 

Thanks, Greg, you think. If you had any idea where he was you would be sure to do so as he was your significant other. Yet communication on large cases tended to hinder his whereabouts. 

Pretty sure John will do a fine job once we find out where the hell Sherlock went, you shot back. 

“What’s this Grantham wants?” Sherlock burst through the door in all his glory, his beautiful Belstaff billowing around him as he fiddled with his phone. Joh chuckled, rolling his eyes at the absurdity and you huffed in amusement. 

“Wonderful to see you too my dear. Welcome home!” You rise to greet Sherlock but he’s over next to you in an instant pulling you in for a hug.

You fall into him, sure that Mrs. Hudson is giggling in a corner sending a meaningful look to John. You don’t care in the slightest, not anymore. Sherlock was always yours and you are his, despite the doubts you had from time to time through the years. 

“Oi, come on you two lovebirds is this a party or what?” Greg beamed, patting John on the shoulder, raising a glass to Mrs. Hudson. It didn’t take him long to find the drinks, you chuckled to yourself, pecking Sherlock’s cheek. “Also, my brother's name is not Grantham. You should know this by now.”

“Smart girl that one is,” Greg said, “yet she gets herself involved with the likes of Sherlock. I’ll never understand it. The Lestrades like danger over stability it seems.” 

“Oh knock it off you all,” Mrs. Hudson admonished. “At least take a few more drinks and at least eat. I bet you all haven’t eaten since lunch, and likely skipped breakfast as well.” 

You cast her a look, for she knew you all too well. “Of course, Mrs. Hudson,” you pulled yourself from Sherlock’s embrace even though it was agony to do so, your mind screaming for you to pull yourself up against him and drown in his kisses and warmth.

You quickly give your brother a hug and Greg grinned good-naturedly as you squeezed him tight. It’d been weeks since you’d seen him given the business of the holidays.

It was nice to finally settle down without the impeding stress of work and other responsibilities, relinquishing yourself to the relaxation amongst friends and family. It was why you cherished moments such as these and when you hugged Sherlock again, ruffling his curls, as he grumped, but you knew deep down he enjoyed it. 

******

Soon enough you’re all full of champagne, a filling meal, and in generally good spirits. Molly made a chance to stop by, too, and you pulled her into a warm embrace. She blushed in the dim light, not expecting it from you. You couldn’t blame her for having a crush on Sherlock all those years, but your mutual jealousy between you had faded with time and you’d come to enjoy her company.

You hand her a glass, eyes shining in mirth and at that moment you know you’ll be alright. With your found family and kin in the room, all felt right. 

Perhaps the year would be a good one after all. 

You found Sherlock in his chair observing the quieter atmosphere as everyone settled, talking quietly. You noted the way his fingers tapped on the chair impatiently and you carefully situated yourself in his lap, setting your half-empty glass on the side table.

From the window, fireworks light the sky in all their glory and soft cheers ring through 221B. You brush your lips against Sherlock’s, and he welcomes you into the dawn of what hopefully will be one of the best years in your memory.

******

[jgroffdaily]

A new interview with Jonathan at the BBC:

How did the role come about?

Oh my god! I got a very exciting text message from Russell T Davies, and I'm a huge fan of his work, especially It’s A Sin - I still haven't recovered from it! So I was very excited to hear from him. He just wrote to me and told me that there was this role that was available on the show and asked me to play it.

Can you describe your character Rogue?

Rogue is an alien bounty hunter and a man of mystery. When we meet Rogue, and he first meets the Doctor, we're in a Regency Era. Rogue is not necessarily who he appears to be when you meet him.

Have you always known of Doctor Who or been a fan of it? Or was this your first experience with the show?

I had known of Doctor Who and how much of a big deal it was in the UK, but I had never seen an episode of it. But Russell sent me about five episodes of Doctor Who from throughout the years, including the first episode that ever aired in black and white. So, I had a very quick crash course before I started.

What was the most challenging or unexpected thing about playing Rogue and stepping into the Whoniverse?

I would say the biggest challenge would be trying to understand and fit into the tone of the show - when you're coming in as a guest star, jumping into a world, and Doctor Who is such a specific thing! In the episodes that Russell showed me, and in the experience of playing a role in it, Doctor Who has such a fascinating tone. It's big, and it's larger than life, but it's also quite real and even though it's fantasy, there is depth to the storytelling and to the relationships. I'd say the biggest challenge was coming in and trying to digest the tone as fast as possible, and to really articulate the character in the proper way in the world of the show.

What was it like acting alongside Ncuti and Millie?

Ncuti and Millie were both so warm and welcoming! Big smiles and full of laughs and embraces, they could not have been more warm. As an outsider, coming into the Whoniverse for the first time, they were the greatest hosts! They took such good care of me and everybody, truly everybody on the set, the crew, everyone!

I spent most of my time with Ncuti and I am obsessed with him. I think he is such a star. He's so unpredictable and thrilling to act with because you never see the same thing twice. He's so spontaneous, and yet so deeply connected to what he's doing. He really cares. He's really in it fully, and he's got this force and positivity that is completely unique to him. It's just phenomenal. I just adore him. I think he is one of the most exciting actors working today.

Did you have any unique experiences or memories from filming?

Well, one happened off set, it actually happened to be when Beyoncé was on her Renaissance Tour. I looked up her tour dates because I'm an obsessive Beyoncé fan. And I found that she was playing Cardiff. I asked that I was off by 4pm so I could make it to the stadium. And I brought Ncuti with me. So we got to see the Renaissance Tour together and it was so much fun. Amazing.

If you could travel anywhere in time and space, where would yon

This is less of a fantasy one. But my grandfather died on my 10th birthday. March 26, 1995. And I was really into I Love Lucy at the time. And one of my gifts for my birthday was this VHS with an episode of I Love Lucy. I went into the living room and I watched my VHS instead of hanging out with my family in the kitchen where my grandfather was. So if I had to go back in time, I would go back in time and I would hang out with him so I could ask him questions before he died.

[viric-dreams]

A timeline for Jones:

1862:

March 27: Robert Vaughn Jones is born in Cardiff, the fifth of what would eventually be six siblings, heirs to a prominent shipping company.

At some point he acquired the childhood nickname Robin from his family.

1869:

A bout of influenza kills his immediately older brother, and has a lasting impact on several family members’ health.

1875-1880:

Jones is sent to England to attend boarding school. Despite his background, he manages to blend in effectively and make himself well-liked amongst his peers. He would spend school holidays back in Wales with his family.

1880:

As he grew older, Jones fell in with a far more politically-aligned and revolutionary crowd. The aftershocks of the Fall shaped his childhood, as well as his time abroad and his family’s hand in sending resources to an Empire without a head. Why should they keep following this pattern? Jones became radicalised, and began to advocate for a Wales free of England, for Celtic unity and solidarity. He found that his talent for getting on with people made him a good mouthpiece for a movement—able to liaison between various groups, and to argue for a cause.

1883:

A protest Jones organised, at which he was speaking, turned into a riot at police provocation. In the ensuing chaos, he struck a constable, inadvertently killing him.

1884:

Jones was put on trial, and subsequently convicted for murder. He was a political nuisance to those in power, and an example would be made of him. During his trial, his family distanced himself from him to avoid scandal, and his friends, partner and allies all seemed to follow. He was sent to New Newgate to send a message: sedition would not be tolerated.

1884-1898:

Jones is in prison. He began this period of his life with the same rebellious fire that drove him through his political work. He tried to form relationships. Over time, those around him would always leave in some capacity and he learnt not to get attached. He slowly stopped seeing people as people, his convictions and that fire worn down to smoke. He started a riot once. Just to see what would happen. They could never pin it to him, but one guard seemed to have a suspicion. He had it out for Jones after that point.

All was not entirely bleak—in this period he got to know the prison’s priest and found religion, finding comfort in the rituals, a book he was finally able to read, and a kind person to talk to.

Towards the tail end of 1898 he’s approached by an agent of the Great Game, offering to make a deal for Jones’ early release, should he step onto the chessboard and serve their cause. Jones takes the deal.  

1898:

Jones moves to London, beginning his onboarding, playing for Red. It’s at this point he’s given a violant tattoo to better withstand irrigo as a part of his job as a letheologist. Shortly into his tenure, he discovered the truth of the matter: Red didn’t want him at all. He was an agent who looked good on paper, perfect to swap with far more useful agents held by Black. Black was not thrilled with the ruse, and Jones had to fight to desperately convince them not to send him back to prison or to take his life or memory. He was allowed to continue work for them, constantly aware that he was on thin ice.

Years in prison had eroded his ideals and his passion for a cause. His early allegiance switch did not help with this. His dedication to the Game was in contract only, doing the bare minimum to keep himself out of the line of sight. Whilst he did manage to remain a degree of apolitical, he found he genuinely enjoyed doing the Rites, having the sense that he’s able to help people by relieving them of that which troubles or burdens them.

At the same time, he relied heavily on his ties with the Church, having been connected with a vicar of a local Anglican congregation through the prison’s priest. This vicar helped him establish a foothold in London, found him a provisional place to stay, a supporting community, and helped him get in touch with and resume a letter-based relationship with his youngest sister, the only family member who will still speak to him.

1899 (Pt. 1) -1899 (Pt. 3):

Jones keeps his head down, doing the bare minimum to satisfy the Game, staying active within the church and social communities, and trying to put his life back together. He establishes a reputation for himself as a well-liked man, a voracious reader, a good conversationalist, though to keen eyes it simply stems from being a good listener.

1899 (Pt. 4):

Jones enters a relationship with a daring personality who’d caught his eye. Over the next several months, the two of them attempt the closest thing to normalcy either of them are able to. Neither of them quite realise what the other is.

Shortly before Christmas, the relationship goes sideways in a spectacular way. This sends Jones on a downward spiral in which he makes several questionable life choices.

Said spiral comes to a sudden and jarring end when he drunkenly mouths off to a constable on New Year’s Eve and is arrested. He spent the night utterly terrified of the possibility of returning to New Newgate. When he was released the next day after drying out without a word about it, Jones vowed to get his life back together. This would never happen again.

1899 (Pt. 4)

Several months down the line, a constable contacts him. The man who had arrested him on New Year’s Eve. The man had made the connection between him and his record, and did not take well to the idea of a cop-killer loose in London. He would, however, be willing to overlook it, in exchange for a favour. For months, he holds this over Jones’ head, seemingly solely intent on stringing him along for his own amusement. Jones is unsure if his work with the Game is compromised and his health deteriorates over months as he falls under suspicion from a fellow agent.

The situation only worsens, as Jones faces the pressure of trying to find a solution to his Constable problem, and the growing dread that his own side is trying to take him off of the board because of it. His surprise promotion to fieldwork during the Coilheart Games did not alleviate the paranoia nor the stress. During his time situated as a Koloman double agent he’d made some contacts with whom he’d kept in touch.

Just as it feels the walls are closing in, Jones comes to a breaking point. He will not be herded to his demise—he will meet it head on. Jones forces a confrontation with his own side, only to learn that the agent in question had learnt about his being blackmailed and was in the process of taking out the constable in question, as well as his dead man’s switch—the guard from New Newgate.

The resolution to his problem did nothing to help with Jones’ health. If anything, the fact that the problem was taken out of his hands has only worsened it. It’s only weeks after that he finally snaps at the vicar of his church and is told to leave. And leave he does—he pulls together an owed favour to get a posting on the Surface, in France, to follow up on a “Koloman” agent seeking to defect.

Upon his return, he’s much restored, taking up his old hobbies and non-work tasks with newfound vigour, trying to outrun the stress his service to the Game has put on his relationships and personal life, and a creature behind the mirror that seems intent on killing him and anyone else nearby whenever he crosses. This culminates in him taking a wrong turn in Parabola and landing in The Mind of a Long-Dead God, possessed by Storm, an expulsion ultimately ending in his death.

Storm does not, however, entirely leave him. Jones finds himself unable to continue work at the Shrine, the mental skills needed to guide the rites bumping up against the residual dragon in a dangerous way, as well as his mild resistance to irrigo. Jones decides to use this relationship to renegotiate the terms of his service, ultimately leaving their employ and becoming something far closer to a contractor.

1899 (Pt. 5)

Jones pivots his focus to a subsidised housing scheme—buying up buildings and offering them to new arrivals to London in need, looking for a way to help people on a tangible level, as well as minor other projects with the aim to help London’s downtrodden.  

Not too long into this venture, a name catches his eye—his sister, come to London with her children without telling him. Jones insists that they all move in with him, aching to rekindle that connection. He tries to balance his new life, managing the dissonance between the man he wants to be, the one from his sister’s memories, and the reality of the lasting impact the Neath has left on him. Memories in the Neath are not rose-tinted, after all.

[djarins-cyare]

So it’s been a year…

One year since Disney released episode 1 season 3 of The Mandalorian

One year since I published chapter 1 of Be-All And Endor

I don’t really remember much of the first 20 weeks of that year, just that it was a flurry of proofreading and finalising and uploading (the hard parts) and comment reading and new friend making and massively appreciating (the wonderful parts).

Proofing and publishing 2 chapters a week with average lengths of around 10k words was exhausting. But for the first 8 of those weeks I had Din Djarin on the screen (intermittently *ahem* but this isn’t a post about the quality of s3) and for the rest of the year I had my readers leaving comments and sending messages, and it was… overwhelmingly the best year of my life.

I mean that. The best year. Ever. Because of you. Any of you, all of you, if you’ve ever even just clicked on my fic and given it chance, you’ve raised the hits on it. Even seeing that metric tick up has made me so thankful.

Because I didn’t think I could write. I always wanted to be an author but never believed in myself.

I did an English degree with writing in mind, but told myself nobody ever does anything with an English degree. I took creative writing modules, and when the published author who ran the class gave me scathing feedback, my dream fully died. I got an okay grade, hardly anything to be proud of, and I graduated and went to work in another industry.

I suffered from clinical depression.

One day many years later, I found a favourite author online and messaged him to ask when his fourth novel in a series was being published, and (emboldened by the anonymity of being online) cheekily offered to proofread it for him. Except he took me seriously and sent me the prologue to see what I could do. Like, for a real book you can buy on Amazon. After feeling sick for two whole days I went all Autistic Obsession on it and sent him back the most thoroughly proofed bit of writing anyone had ever seen. And I got the job. (I say ‘job’, I’d volunteered for free in exchange for the privilege of reading it in advance, so I can only ever call it semi-professional since I didn’t earn from it).

This, amongst other things, lifted me from my depression. I came off the pills and felt happier, more creative. Once the proofing was completed, the author encouraged me to write my own stuff, but whilst I’d gained some confidence… my brain was empty. I had no clamouring stories to get down on the page, no gems ready to polish.

Then in summer 2021, a friend sat me down and showed me the first 3 episodes of the Mandalorian. And my brain chemistry was instantly altered. I binge-watched the first two seasons, by the end of which I was unequivocally in love with Din Djarin, and then I binge-watched them again.

Around that time, I moved to a different country. Well, Wales is still the UK, but it’s a different country to England, and I was now 170 miles away from my friends. I went because as a single woman on a middling salary, London is too expensive to live in and having rid myself of an overbearing long term relationship, I was NOT keen to get into another one just to pay the bills. The pandemic meant I could work remotely, so I upped sticks and moved to Cardiff, resolving to visit my office in London (and my friends) once a month. It’s 2 hours by train, totally doable.

So what to do with all the spare time I suddenly had?

By Easter 2022 I’d started writing. 9 months later (yes, it’s my actual baby), Be-All And Endor was complete and I began publishing alongside season 3’s release.

Now… it has over 62.k views and 1.2k kudos 🥹🤯

Did I think it would be this popular? No way. I can’t even believe it now. I still see SO much wrong with it, which is why I’m still proofreading and editing it.

A professional proofread/edit takes a long time, and if you’re wondering what I’m doing to it, it involves the following:

Checking for things like clichés, non-inclusive language

Checking all adverbs to see if a better word can be used (e.g. ‘bellows’ instead of ‘shouts loudly’… adverbs usually end in -ly and it’s not good to overuse them)

Rephrasing any passive sentences (simply put: ‘the ship is flown by Din’ is passive; ‘Din flies the ship’ is active)

Reducing average sentence length (shorter sentences are easier to read)

Going through every single damn polysyllabic word (e.g. anything that has more than 3-syllables) and seeing if a shorter synonym can be found (this helps the rhythm, as too many long words slows things down and can make readers stumble… and I use them a lot 😖)

Checking the 50 most frequently used words and seeing if I can find synonyms for those (helps give more variety in the language)

Ensuring Din’s name isn’t overused or underused, and adding epithets (e.g. ‘the hunter’ or ‘your Mandalorian’) where it’s overused but it’s too confusing to just say ‘he’/‘him’

These are the big things, but there’s more too - I’m streamlining decisions I made to use certain phrasings throughout; tweaking Din’s word choice here and there to ensure his voice is captured the best way possible; revamping some of the photos. And with all the tiny tweaks, it’s slowly padding things out too… when publishing was done it was 393k, now it’s 403k, although it’s not extra content as such, just better described.

I’m up to chapter 13 so far, and I’ll probably be doing this for another 2 years to get through all 40, because (a) I want to write other things too so that slows down the proofing, and (b) I so badly want to be proud of this project… everyone’s telling me I should be, and I am in a way… but it’s more gratitude to others than pride in myself… and I feel like if I get this proofing done and finally have a story I’m truly happy with, I can at last let myself be proud of what I achieved here.

I confess, I’m so envious of those who can post something without obsessing over it. I know it’s a facet of my autism, and I’ve long since accepted that my neurodivergent brain will not let me be cool about things other people are cool about. If I’ve learned anything, it’s that I should turn it to my advantage, so okay… I’m gonna make this fic the same quality as a published book on your bookshelf. And meanwhile I’m gonna enjoy and love all the fics that people can write and publish with far greater speed than I can, because the greatest thing about this fandom is that every contribution is worthy of appreciation, no matter the author’s experience or writing method. Quality fic isn’t synonymous with proofreading, and I hope it’s clear that I’m describing my obsession with perfecting my own writing, not other people’s. I’ve read so many amazing authors on here, and I want them all to know how much I love their work (any recs are from the bottom of my heart).

So anyway, this long and rambling post has turned into something unintended… I guess you now have some insight into my mind and the origins of Be-All And Endor and the future of it. Not what I meant to do, but I’ll leave it in for context.

Because the real reason I started writing this diatribe was because I wanted to express my true and undying gratitude to everyone who has ever read, commented, or left kudos on my fic over on AO3, and/or messaged me, followed me, interacted with me, or reblogged my masterlist here on tumblr 🧡💚

I know I am insanely lucky to have received the level of support I have, and I don’t take that for granted at all. I want to give back to this fandom, and I love reading and reccing other people’s fics, meeting new moots, and hopefully soon I’ll be publishing new fics for you all to read too. Fresh material is percolating, so it won’t be too long now.

So thank you to everyone who reads this post, you’re the absolute best and I love you more than I have the vocabulary to describe. Please accept a grateful forehead kiss instead 💋

[merrybloomwrites]

You Can Start a Family (Chapter 7)

Summary:

Reader joins Mitch and Sarah for Love on Tour! First stop, Slane.

Previous Chapters: One ; Two ; Three ; Four ; Five ; Six

TW for this chapter: Smut

AN: My original plan for this chapter was to cover the entire time reader joins them for Love on Tour (aka Slane, Wembley, Cardiff, Belguim) but I once again got carried away. It's the longest chapter yet but only covers Ireland haha

Hope you enjoy!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mitch and Sarah love touring, but it doesn’t mean they don’t miss you. They have what they consider the best job in the world, but they’re still counting down the days until they see you again.

They love getting to do video calls, taking you on walks through the countries they’re in. They get excited each time you send an audio message because you want to tell them more information than you have the patience to text.

On more than one occasion, they’ve called or FaceTimed after a show, both too wound up to sleep right away. In the past they would just burn off that extra energy together in bed, but now they want you to be involved as well. Because of the time difference you’re normally just finishing dinner when this happens, and you’ve learned to keep your phone well charged even at the end of the day for situations like this. You love watching them together, listening to them tell you what to do with your hands, what they would do to you if you were all together. You wish you could be with them, pleasing them, but you admit this is better than nothing.

On a more innocent note, Mitch and Sarah absolutely love the adorable videos of you and Ryan that Tammy sends. There are videos of you both running around the yard, swimming in the pool, and tending to the garden. Their favorite is sent to them one evening shortly before a show. It’s of you and Ryan listening to Satellite and dancing. You’re both spinning around and then you begin to do the Satellite Stomps as dramatically as possible, sending Ryan into a fit of belly laughs so contagious that you fall over laughing as well.

Sarah’s the first to see the video and walks over to share it with Mitch. She hands him the phone and they watch together multiple times, huge smiles on both of their faces.

“That’s your new friend Y/N, right?” Harry asks. They both quickly turn, surprised to see they aren’t alone in their corner of the band dressing room.  

“Yea, that’s her,” Sarah answers, handing over the phone to Harry who presses play on the video. He also breaks into a huge grin. He always loves to see people of all ages enjoying his music, and it’s easy to tell that you and Ryan are having an absolute blast listening to it.

“She’s cute,” he says. Mitch and Sarah both softly agree, eyes back on the video of you. Harry watches them, curious about their reactions. There’s a certain look on their faces, one that takes him a minute to place but when he does, he’s more confused. It was a look of love and adoration that Mitch and Sarah always reserved for one another.

Before he can ask about that he’s pulled away to finish getting ready for the show.

***********

After nearly 5 weeks apart, it’s finally time for you to take your first international flight to join them on tour.

You’re finishing up at work, ready to stop home, grab your bags, and head to the airport. As you leave, you thank Ryan’s mom again for agreeing to take care of your cats while you’re gone.

Meanwhile Mitch and Sarah are equal parts excited and nervous for the following day. They cannot wait to reunite with you, but it’s also Mitch’s first solo show and that comes with a lot of nerves. Sure, they’ve been touring forever, but this is different. It’s Mitch’s own music, his vibe very different from Harry’s, and he’s not sure what the fans will think. Not to mention it’s one of the largest crowds they’ve ever played for.

Once you get to your gate at the airport you call them, knowing that it’s around the time they’ll be getting into bed. One thing you’re excited about is being in the same time zone, tired of doing mental math every time you want to talk to them.

“Hi love!” Sarah says as she picks up. “Are you at the airport?”

“Yup! Just got to my gate. Wanted to check in before it got too late over there.”

“Well, you caught us at the perfect time then,” she replies. “I was just reading a little in bed, waiting for Mitch to join me.”

“How’s he doing?”

“Oh, he’s a bit nervous about tomorrow, I think he’s excited though. Harry’s been teaching him a lot of tricks to help with the nerves, so I think that has him feeling more confident.”

“That’s good! Do you think I’ll see you guys before he goes on?”

“You should. Mitch and I have to head over to the venue pretty early but everyone else isn't leaving until later in the day. You’ll be given all the details when you get to the hotel tomorrow, but I think the plan is for you to ride over with Elin and Ariza.”

“Oh, cool! I’m so excited! This is going to be amazing, and I cannot wait to see you both.”

“We can’t wait either. Oh, here’s Mitch, I’ll let you two talk a bit.”

There’s a pause on the other line before you hear Mitch’s soft voice. “Hey, babe,” he says.

“Hi, how are you feeling?”

“Good. I mean, nervous, but in a good way I think. It’s like, adrenaline maybe? Honestly, I’m just trying to focus on the fact that we’ll get to see you in a few hours.”

You melt a little at his words, and you can’t help but smile knowing that you’re going to see them so soon. It’s been hard going so long without them, and comments like this let you know you’re not the only one who’s been struggling with the separation.

You talk to Mitch and Sarah for a little longer, sharing stories to relax them so they can fall asleep and be ready for the following day. Once you hear that they’ve switched to their sleepy voices you wish them goodnight and hang up.

You’re too excited to read your book so you take a walk through the terminal while waiting to board. You’re unfortunately no less riled up on the plane, trying to sleep but managing only an hour or two.

Next thing you know, you’re landing in Ireland, finally in a country other than the United States for the first time in your life. You’re tired, and a tad anxious about all the unknown around you, but still thrumming with energy knowing that you’ll see Mitch and Sarah in just a couple hours.

You find the car that will take you to the hotel and the 30-minute drive passes quickly as you watch the scenery out the window. You arrive at the hotel, check in, and a minute later a young woman walks up to you asking, “Are you Y/N?”

“Yes, I am,” you reply.

“Perfect, you’re right on time! I’m Becca, one of the assistants for the tour.” You shake her hand, and she continues, “I have you leaving in 1 hour with Elin, Ariza, and Pauli to head over to the venue. Will you be ready then? If not, I could place you in a van leaving a bit later.”

“I will absolutely be ready in 1 hour,” you say with a smile. Sure, you’re tired and grimy from flying, but you don’t want to delay your reunion another minute.

“Wonderful, we’ll be meeting in the lounge on the 3rd floor.”

“Thank you so much!”

You head up to your room to shower and get ready. You’re glad your outfit hadn’t wrinkled in your bag, so that’s one less thing to worry about. You get dressed, put on your makeup, and style your hair. There are only a few minutes before you need to meet up with everyone, so you grab your bag and head over.

The past day has already been such a whirlwind, and it isn’t until you’re outside the door to the lounge that you remember how many new people you’ll be meeting that day. Not just new people, but musicians you’ve been admiring for months, some for years.

The nerves hit you as soon as you walk into the room and see Elin, Ariza, and Pauli sitting on the couches. They immediately look at you as you walk in, and you feel like the outsider walking into a Saloon in an Old Western movie.

The feeling only lasts for a second before all three of them break out into smiles and get up to introduce themselves. They’re all absolutely lovely and the drive over to Slane Castle is filled with wonderful conversation. You let Pauli know how much you love their new song Saucy, that you’d listened to it at least a dozen times since it was released the previous day.

In no time at all the van is pulling into the venue. You’re amazed at the size of it, at the beauty of the castle. For a moment you think of your grandfather, whose family had come from Ireland, and suddenly feel a moment of connection to him. You know he would’ve absolutely loved to see this place, even been excited just to know you were able to go there.

You’re broken from your reverie by the others getting out of the van, and you follow them to backstage area that’s been set up. Thoughts of your family are chased out by one single thought: Mitch and Sarah are here.

You try to be patient. After all you don’t actually know where they are or where to go, but it’s taking everything in you not to start running through the halls to find them. You continue to follow the other band members, assuming they’re heading to the band dressing room, and you’ll find Mitch and Sarah there, but you get stopped by another member of the crew.

There’s a moment where you’re scared that he’s going to question who you are and if you’re allowed there, but he just says, “You’re Mitch and Sarah’s friend? They have a Y/N on their list set to arrive at this time. Is that you?”

“Yes, I’m Y/N,” you say, amazed by the level of professionalism and coordination that goes into the tour.

“I’ll show you to their dressing room.”

You smile and nod, following him further down the hallway.

“They’re finishing soundcheck, but you can wait in there for them.”

“Great, thank you so much!” As soon as you finish your sentence he’s gone, onto his next task of this incredibly busy day.

It’s chillier than you expected it to be, and you look over to see Mitch’s bag in the corner. There are a couple sweatshirts inside, and you grab one to put on, hoping he won’t mind.

You sit on the couch that’s in the room, resting your eyes while waiting for them. It’s only a bit longer before you hear the door opening. You don’t even have time to get up before you have a lap full of Sarah. Her limbs wrap around you and your arms go around her waist, holding her as close as possible. She tucks her face into your neck, and you feel Mitch sit on the couch next to you both. He leans in, pressing kisses to the side of your head.

You look up at him with a smile before he checks the door is closed and firmly slots his lips against yours. It’s passionate, but quick. As soon as you break apart, Sarah pulls you in for a similar kiss of her own.

You blink at both of them, partially dazed by the intensity of the greeting you received, partially unable to believe that you’re really here with them. It’s been 5 weeks since you’ve seen them, and tears well up in your eyes at the overwhelming relief of being held by them.

“You’re here,” Sarah whispers as though she can’t believe it.

“I’m here,” you reply just as quietly. She moves off of your lap and Mitch pulls you onto his. You’re sitting sideways so your legs lay over Sarah’s, and Mitch’s arms hold you tight. You hold Sarah’s hand in yours, and just sit quietly.

No one knows how long you all sit in silence, simply enjoying being together again, but you’re interrupted by Mitch’s phone ringing. He’s only on the call a moment before hanging up with a polite “thank you”.

“There’s food set out for lunch,” he informs you both.

You and Sarah nod to acknowledge this but make no move to get up until your stomach starts to growl.

“Let’s get you something to eat,” Mitch says, and you finally force yourself off of his lap. They walk over to the door, and you take a deep breath before following.

“Are you alright, love?” Sarah asks.

“Yea, just nervous about meeting everyone else.”

“Well, you’ve got us, and you’ve already met half the band. How were they this morning?”

“Very welcoming. Pauli ended up in our van too, so we talked a lot about their new music.”

“See? Nothing to be nervous about.” She places her hand lightly on your back knowing that the touch along with her words would help ease your anxiety. You’re still slightly overwhelmed walking into the room where lunch was set up but find quickly that there’s no need to be worried.

You meet the rest of the band and enjoy some delicious food. After a little while Mitch gets up saying that he needs to start getting ready. Sarah stands as well, and you look at them, unsure if you’re supposed to follow. Mitch tilts his head slightly and you understand that he wants you to go with them.  

It’s while you’re walking back to the dressing room that you meet Harry Styles in person for the first time. You’re grateful for the few times you’ve spoken on the phone or FaceTime because you’re able to keep calm and not fangirl at all. He walks with you all back to the room, wanting to talk with Mitch before his first solo set.

While the boys are talking, you sit with Sarah and watch her do her hair and makeup. She asks about your flight and what you think of the Irish scenery so far; all the small talk you avoided before lunch.

After a couple minutes Harry stands, saying, “Alright well I’ll let you guys finish getting ready. Y/N, would you like me to help you find someone to show you where to watch from?”

Before you can answer Mitch replies, “Actually Pete’s supposed to come back in a little bit to show her.”

“Oh, okay. Sounds good then. Y/N it was lovely officially meeting you. I hope you enjoy the show.”

You smile and wave as he walks away, all of you unaware of how closely he was observing your trio. Harry knew Mitch likes his time away from everyone, and assumed he would want no one other than Sarah before getting on stage, but here he is insisting this new friend stays. Harry also noticed how comfortable you and Sarah were while she was getting ready, small touches shared between you. He figures it could just be friendly, you helping her make sure her hair is exactly in place, but for some reason it seemed more intimate than that. Add on the fact that you’re definitely wearing one of Mitch’s sweatshirts and Harry finds himself once again curious about your relationship with the couple.

After Harry’s gone, they quickly finish with their prep and get dressed. There are a few minutes left before they need to get their in-ears and head to the stage.

You watch as Mitch crosses to the door, locking it. He first walks over to Sarah, pulling her in for a deep, searing kiss. It’s short, but passionate. He turns to you and does the same. It’s a kiss with so much emotion that it fills your whole body with warmth.

As he goes to pull away you quietly tell him how wonderful he’s going to do, how proud you are of him. He tucks his face into your neck, seeing comfort from your words and touch. He starts nodding and you know that he’s listening, absorbing what you’re saying and gaining a burst of confidence.

He steps back and then there are once again lips against yours. This time they’re Sarah’s and they press gently against yours in a series of soft, chaste kisses. You give her a similar pep talk and then she pulls away.

Everyone takes a collective deep breath and Mitch unlocks the door. You make sure your hair is okay and you and Sarah check each other’s lipstick.

A minute later there’s a knock on the door, and the same guy from before, that you’ve now learned is Pete, stands on the other side. You give Mitch and Sarah each a quick friendly hug and follow him out to join the audience.

Once you walk outside, you’re met with an insane sight that takes your breath away. A sea of thousands of people full of excited energy. You’ve already been given a Johnny’s Place wristband and will mix in with the crowd there when Harry goes on, but you’re led to a spot close to the stage for Mitch’s set. You also have a special badge that will allow you backstage again throughout the day.

You’re looking around at the crowd when you start to hear loud cheering. You quickly turn back to the stage to see them walking out. Mitch’s face isn’t giving away much of what he’s feeling, but you know him well enough to see a slight bit of nerves. He grabs the first guitar he needs and scans the crowd. In no time at all his eyes meet yours, and you smile. His lips twitch ever so slightly and while he doesn’t smile back you see him visibly relax.

You love every second of watching him and Sarah. They do an amazing job and Mitch’s voice feels like home to you. The second he walks off stage you start to move.  Earlier in the day they had asked you to meet them back in their dressing room after the set, and that is exactly where you are headed.

The door is open, so you walk in to wait for them. It’s a few minutes later when they swiftly enter the room. Sarah closes and locks the door as Mitch runs over to you, picking you up and spinning you around before placing you back in front of him and crushing his lips to yours. You gasp and feel his tongue pressing against yours.

The kiss is over as quickly as it began, knowing you all will only have a minute or two of privacy before people come looking to congratulate Mitch.

You press your forehead against his, whispering, “You did amazing. I am so, so proud of you.” A huge smiles spreads across his face, and Sarah comes over to wrap an arm around each of you for a moment. You both turn to kiss her, then take another minute to bask in this wonderful moment together before breaking apart and opening the door.

It doesn’t take long for others to start filing in and out. You hang in the back, proudly watching as Mitch receives all the well-deserved praise.

After a while it quiets down, people heading back outside to watch the other opening acts. You peek out and watch a little bit of Annie Mac and Inhaler, but mostly want to stay close to Mitch and Sarah as much as you can.

Pete comes back partway through Wet Leg’s set to escort you to your spot for the show. You mix into the Jonny’s Place crowd and find a spot towards the side about halfway back. It may not be front and center, but you can tell you’ll be able to see Mitch and Sarah fairly well, plus you’re right next to the catwalk you know Sarah will walk down for Matilda.

You enjoy the rest of Wet Leg’s performance and spend the break watching the fans around you, feeling every bit as excited as them, until finally you’re all singing the end of Bohemian Rhapsody. The crowd is buzzing with energy and the cheering increases as the band takes the stage and the intro starts.

You’ve already made eye contact with both Mitch and Sarah, and you have a good feeling people are going to share the clip of the slight smile Mitch gives when he sees you.

Harry makes his entrance and you’re screaming with everyone else, before singing along to Daydreaming. After the first few songs Harry takes a moment to shout out the openers and you cheer especially loudly for Mitch.

You continue to enjoy the show, watching Mitch with laser focus during She, continually amazed by his skill and talent. As soon as the song ends you expect to see Sarah walk to join Harry, Madi, and Elin at the B stage but then Harry says, “We haven’t played this one in a little while so bear with me,” and you, along with everyone else, start to freak out about what song they’re going to do.

The first notes to Little Freak start to play and everyone screams before starting to sing too early, and you laugh remembering the same thing happened at the show you attended months ago. While everyone has turned around to watch Harry, you keep your eyes on the main stage, loving the calmness Mitch and Sarah exude as they play this slower, more gentle song.

After it’s over Sarah walks past, glancing at you quickly with a smirk. Mitch starts the into to Matilda and you take in the moment around you. The setting sun makes for a beautiful background, and you can’t help but be enamored by Sarah. Her gentle sway, her hands clasped behind her back, and her voice coming through as a perfect harmony to the others.

You’ve listened to this song plenty of times before, even heard it live, but it’s hitting differently now. The words “you can start a family” bring tears to your eyes as you realize that’s what you’ve done in the past months with Mitch and Sarah. They’ve accepted you fully into their relationship, and you’ve joined their family.

By the end of the song, you’re smiling and crying. Sarah gives you a genuinely warm smile as she walks back to the main stage, and you know that she understands just what you’re feeling at that moment.

It takes a minute for you to compose yourself but once Harry gets to the Satellite Stomps you’ve wiped away your tears and are focused back on Sarah; you can watch the stomps at another show.

You continue to have the time of your life, singing and dancing along to the music. Hearing Fine Line live is as magical as you thought it would be and you feel like you could continue to live in that moment forever. Harry gives a wonderful performance, and the instrumental at the end is perfection.

They take their short break before coming back and doing the last 4 songs of the night. You scream as you hear Sarah hit the drumsticks and Mitch starts the iconic intro to Medicine. Once Kiwi begins you start looking everywhere at once, trying to watch every extremely talented member of this band during the final song of the night.

The next thing you know Harry’s doing his signature whale move and the show comes to an end. You quickly make your way through the crowd, showing your badge to get backstage again. After following voices, you turn a corner and see the band walking in front of you towards the dressing rooms.

“You guys better meet us back here to hang out while we wait!” Pauli shouts as Mitch and Sarah break off to the other room. You slide in the room behind the couple and close the door before pulling them in for a group hug.

“That was amazing! Thank you so much for bringing me here!”  

“We’re so happy that you’re here with us, baby,” Mitch says, squeezing tighter as Sarah nods her head that’s resting on your neck.

After a minute you all break apart and they change out of their concert outfits.

“C’mon, we’d better join the others,” Sarah says and the three of you make your way back down the hall to where the rest of the band is hanging out.

“Welcome!” Ariza shouts. “Congrats everyone on another epic show! Sarah, Mitch, Y/N, drinks are over there. We’ve got some time to kill so might as well keep the party going!”

You all grab a drink and the next thing you know, you’re in the middle of a post-concert party with the love band. It’s nothing crazy, and you enjoy the opportunity to sit and chat with Madi, the newest band member. You learn she was also born in Connecticut but had moved to Pennsylvania very early and grew up there. You’re familiar with the area she was raised in, having visited there with your family on multiple occasions as a child and you two talk about places that you’ve both been.

After a little while Pauli and Yaffra join your group, and you find yourself listening to their conversation while not adding much. Suddenly the fatigue starts to hit, and you realize that aside from the short nap you had on the plane, you’d been up for nearly 36 hours straight. Your eyelids start to grow heavy as you lean against the arm of the couch. You’re fighting to keep your eyes open and look over to Sarah. She immediately notices how sleepy you are and comes over to sit next to you on the arm and rests a hand lightly on your shoulder.

She leans down and quietly says, “Shouldn’t be much longer and we’ll be heading out, okay love?” You nod, and she starts to run her fingers through your hair, which does nothing to help you stay awake but is incredibly comforting. You’re grateful that Sarah is known to be a rather affectionate person, and you relax into the touch knowing that no one is going to question how close you two are.

You’ve nearly fallen asleep with your head resting against her side when a crew member comes in to bring everyone to the vans. The crowds of fans have finally cleared the roads and almost all of the buses have left.

Once you get to the van you climb into the backseat followed by Sarah then Mitch. Elin and Ariza sit in the middle row, and you all start your journey.

The drive back to the hotel isn’t very long, but at this point you’re absolutely exhausted and it’s only a minute before you’re asleep with your head on Sarah’s shoulder. She wakes you when you arrive at the hotel and keeps a firm arm around your waist all the way back to your room, seeing that you’re barely awake.

You hand her your key, too tired to get it to work, and she walks into your room with you while Mitch goes next door. Luckily you have adjoining rooms, and he opens the connecting door on their side while Sarah does the same on your side, so they can sneak you into their room with no one seeing.

Sarah helps you get changed, brush your teeth, and remove your make up before leading you to their bed where Mitch is already laying down. You curl up to him and pass out immediately.

You wake up the next morning with a person on either side of you. It’s familiar but also foreign after sleeping alone for over a month. You tuck yourself further into the neck of the person you’re facing, and the feeling of scruff against your cheek informs you that it’s Mitch.

Sarah presses closer to you from behind and you feel her start to kiss your throat as Mitch’s hands travel up and down your body. You may have been too tired for anything the previous night, but now you feel well rested, completely alert, and you don’t want to waste another minute before finally reconnecting.

You lift your head up and without even opening your eyes you start to kiss Mitch’s neck, moving up to blindly search for his lips. Once you hit your target you let out a sigh at the feeling of sharing this intimate kiss with him.

It starts slow and lazy, tongues casually sliding against each other. After a couple of minutes, you break apart and you turn to Sarah. You throw a leg between hers and lay on top of her. She pulls you in and you’re lost in making out with her, grinding down to bring pleasure to both of you.

She starts lifting your shirt off and the three of you remove your pajamas, glad you all slept in the bare minimum of clothes the night before. You climb back on top of her before trailing kisses down her body. Once you reach her center you swipe your tongue across the intimate area, and the sounds you pull from her is music to your ears.

As you add a finger to the mix, you feel Mitch stand at the end of the bed. He pulls up your hips so he can line up himself behind you. His hard length slides through your folds and your eyes roll back in your head at that contact alone.

“Are you sure you want to go bare?” Mitch asks, referring to a conversation you all had had over the phone a few weeks ago. Right after they left for tour you had a doctor’s appointment and went on birth control and were excited to finally feel Mitch without a barrier.

“Yes, yes, please, I want to feel you,” you reply. Mitch doesn’t hesitate another moment and slides into you in one slow thrust. When you feel him bottom out, you’re overwhelmed and pull back from Sarah for a moment. You rest your head against her thigh and take a few deep breaths. She gently pets your hair as Mitch runs his hands along your back. The combination of sensual and sweet at the same time nearly short circuits your brain.

After a moment you regain your composure and bring your mouth back to Sarah’s core and start moving your fingers again. The room is filled with the sounds of everyone’s pleasure, and it feels so right that the three of you are finally able to reconnect in this way and bring everyone to this state of pure bliss.

You know when Sarah is getting close and focus on helping her cross that finish line. You slide your free hand along her torso, hoping to ease her down after her intense high.

You’re so focused on Sarah it takes a moment to realize that Mitch has stopped moving. He pulls out and you whine at the loss.

“I just want to see you,” Mitch says as he gently manhandles you onto your back then slides inside you again. It only takes another minute before you feel the familiar pressure building, and you come, your nails scratching along Mitch’s back at the overwhelming pleasure.

After another few sloppy thrusts, Mitch is finishing inside of you and you think that you could black out at the feeling of him coming without a condom. You pull him in for a sloppy kiss as you both come down. He stays inside of you for a few minutes, having figured out early on that the continued connection after sex is something you crave.

Finally he pulls out and as always, gets up to grab cloths to clean everyone. Before he can get back Sarah is on top of you, sliding one leg in between yours. She leans down to kiss you, and after a minute you feel her start to grind against your leg. You shift until her leg is against your core as well, and the two of you work up a rhythm.

Mitch watches as you both come again at the same time, your open mouth kisses turning into practically panting into each other’s mouth.

After you’ve both caught your breath, Mitch helps you both clean up. You whine as the cloth touches your now hypersensitive core and you hear him murmur apologies.

Once you and Sarah are clean Mitch lays down next to you both, wrapping his arms around you and pressing light kisses to your heads.

You almost fall back asleep when Mitch asks, “What do you think about being a typical tourist in Ireland for the afternoon?” Your eyes light up and you nod vigorously.

“I think that sounds perfect!”

The three of you get up and move into the shower together. You all eat room service while getting ready and shortly before you plan to leave there’s a knock on the door.

Mitch goes over to answer and a minute later walks back in with Harry following behind.

“Good morning girls,” Harry says.

“Hey Harry!” you reply.

“What are you guys up to today?” he asks.

“We’re gonna head into Dublin for a few hours. Y/N’s never been so we want to walk around and explore a bit,” Sarah answers.

“That sounds fun!” he answers, looking between the three of you.

“You’re welcome to join us if you’d like,” Mitch adds. He’s known Harry long enough to tell that he was hoping for an invitation, though he’s not entirely sure why. It’s rare that Harry chooses to head into big cities when he’s touring, knowing the high likelihood of being stopped by fans.

“I mean, if you all don’t mind, I’d love too,” he replies.

You all head out and enjoy a wonderful afternoon sightseeing. Harry does get stopped a handful of times, but the fans are all lovely and polite. The last activity of the day is the Guinness Storehouse for a tour and dinner; after all the plan was to be a typical tourist in Dublin.

Harry sits next to you on the ride home and spends the trip asking you questions about yourself. You enjoy the conversation, but there’s a voice in the back of your mind that cannot believe this is reality, that you're just casually talking to Harry Styles.  

At the hotel Harry follows your trio up to your rooms, which you find curious since you know his room is on another floor. You all stand awkwardly in the hallway for a moment before Harry say, “Well, guess I should be heading back. It was lovely getting to know you more today, Y/N.” He leans in to give you a hug, which you don’t expect and you lift your arms somewhat ungracefully in return.

“Good-night everyone, see you all bright and early tomorrow,” he says as he waves and walks away.

You walk into your room while Mitch and Sarah walk into theirs. You immediately get changed into pajamas and do your bedtime routine. You walk back into the other room and sit on the bed, turning on the TV to wait while the others finish getting ready.

Mitch is the first to join you and the first words out of his mouth shock you. “I think Harry has a crush on you.”

While seconds ago you were verging on sleep, you’re suddenly wide awake. “What?” you ask, sitting up to stare at him, eyes practically bugging out of your head at what you view as an absurd statement. “Why in the world would you think that?”

“I’ve known Harry for years, I’ve seen how he is. He was definitely watching you today.”

“Okay, so say you’re right. What do I do if he tries to like, act on that crush? How do I turn him down without telling him about the three of us?”

At this point Sarah has joined the two of you on the bed and says, “What do you guys think about just telling him the truth?”

You turn to Mitch to get his response before sharing your own. “Well,” he starts. “I trust Harry. He’s my best friend. Honestly, I kind of want to tell him the truth soon no matter what. It feels weird keeping something this big from him.”

You nod as you listen to him, and pause for a moment before answering, “You know him best. If you trust him then I have no reason not to. I’m fine with him learning about us.”

Mitch grabs your hand and you both turn to Sarah who says, “I think we should tell him. Hopefully there’ll be a time this week we can all get together again and explain the story.”

Everyone feels a sense of happiness at the thought of finally letting someone in on the secret. The three of you have a wonderful relationship, but there’s something about someone on the outside knowing that makes it feel more real somehow.

You all cuddle under the covers, Mitch and Sarah wrapping their arms around you. It’s your favorite place to be, and you quickly fall asleep.

It’s an early morning the next day in order to get to the airport for the quick flight to London. You sit in the window seat with Sarah and Mitch next to you, and despite how early in the day it is you find yourself filled with excited energy. It’s only been a couple days since your trip away from home started and you’ve already had so much fun with your two favorite people. You cannot wait to see what the rest of the trip brings.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: Thanks you so much for reading this chapter! I hope you're enjoying it and would love to know what everyone's thinking so far!

Taglist: @akkatz @pandeebearstyles @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @theekyliepage @numafarawayglxy @booberry019-blog @hillzrry @ssareidbby @gem1712 @acesofspadess @houseofdilfs @shaquille-0atmeal-1 @kissitnhekitchen

[maxverstappensflatbrim]

Show Me Yours | Matty Healy [24]

chapter twenty-four, act three: so far (it's alright)

masterlist

February 27th 2015

Tommie sits at the bar of this random rooftop party, swirling her drink around in the glass. It’s just a coke, Caleb had mentioned in front of the bartender how she turned twenty one later on in the year, so now the guy refused to serve her anything of interest.

“I’ll have a gin and tonic, please.”

The guy behind the bar looks up at the new woman beside her and she smiles, “ID?”

“Oh, shoot, shoot, shoot. Seems I have forgotten it, um, I was here last week, you served me, remember?”

“No.” The guy says deadpan, “Kid, you look twelve, no ID, no drink.”

“You should try the coke, it’s divine.” Tommie says sarcastically to her.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what’s that accent?” The woman with bright hair asks.

“Welsh.” Tommie says, then gets ready for her usual speech. ‘England, London, you know, the Queen, Brits, yeah well the UK isn’t just one country, it’s three, well three and a bit, I guess. And no, I don’t live in a whale, Wales is a country-’

“Oh, cool, I’ve been there once, it was a total accident though. My drummer took a wrong turn and we ended up in some place called like Chepton or something.”

“Chepstow.”

She nods quickly, “Yeah, it was actually a cute, little town, you from near there?”

“Uh, not far, grew up like an hour out of Cardiff.”

“Cardiff’s your capital, right?”

She nods, “I’m Phoebe, by the way.”

“Tommie.”

“Nice to meet you.” She smiles, and purses her lips turning away to look around the party.

“You from LA? Visiting?”

Phoebe nods, “From here, yeah. Uh, this guy- do you know who's throwing the party, what was his name, Brad, Bret?”

She shrugs, “Some arsehole frat name like that, I’m not sure, my boyfriend dragged me here.”

She chuckles, “Mine too, well, the guys an old friend of his and he’s trying to get my music heard by pulling some strings apparently, Brad Bret, has friends high up in the industry.” Phoebe shrugs, “I don’t want to do it that way, I want to be founded, like in a dingy bar by a producer who’s right on the tipping point of their career, struggling with their partner, losing custody of their kids and I’m the big break that turns their life around again.”

Tommie smiles at that, “You have any music out?”

She nods, “Yeah, some stuff on youtube.”

“I’ll give it a listen.”

Phoebe's smile brightens a little bit and Tommie finds her own mirroring hers, “Sorry,” She apologies before speaking again, “You probably get this a lot, especially around here, and I feel like an inconsiderate asshole, but I just want you to know, I think you’re great.”

Tommie blushes slightly, “Thank you.”

“Honestly, your writing is just absolutely amazing. I mean your poem Trial Child, stuck with me for weeks.”

Tommie’s smile brightens just a little bit when she realises she’s recognised for her poetry and not her band.

“Thank you, it means a lot. I don't really get complimented on my writing often.”

“Really? Why not, it’s great. More than great.”

She thanks her again as they go back to people watching, “Which one’s your boyfriend?” Tommie asks.

She points to a blonde guy standing with a beer in hand across the bar, “He’s the one with sunglasses talking to the short guy with weird spiky hair. Where's yours?”

“The short guy with weird spiky hair.”

Phoebe laughs. The pair stick together the entire night, when Tommie goes for a smoke (around the back so Caleb won’t see) Phoebe goes with her, sharing her last three cigarettes as they talk music.

The door behind them opens and Tommie’s glad that Pheobes is holding the cigarette in her hand, “Hey, babe, you ready?”

She nods pushing herself up, “It was nice meeting you, Tommie.”

She smiles, “Text me next time you’re around.”

Phoebe nods, “I should say that to you, I live here.”

“Right, well, I’ll text you when I’m in LA again.”

Phoebe nods, “I await your message.”

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ

“Who was that girl you were with?” Caleb asks as he hangs his coat up.

Mitchell perks up from the dining room table as the door opens, “Hey.”

“Uh, Phoebe… didn't get her last name actually. She’s a singer, was really nice.”

“I recgonised her,” Caleb tells her, nodding to Mitchellvand then kicking at Shane’s foot to wake him up, “Think I’ve seen her perform before.”

“She any good? She gave me the vibe that she is. She was confident but not cocky, you know?”

Claeb shrugs, “Not for me, but she wasn’t bad.”

She nods watching as he pushes Shane towards his bedroom in the loft apartment. “Where’s James?”

“At his female’s apartment.”

Tommie’s nose curls as she walks over to the kitchen to grab herself a drink, “Wow, and you wonder why no ‘females’ want you.”

“What's that supposed to mean?”

She stands kicking the fridge door shut and leans on the counter, looking through the small little open window that looks into the living/ dining area.

“Don’t call women females if you want them to even look at your dick.”

Caleb smirks to himself, moving to pick at some of the grapes in the fruit bowl, arms tugging her towards him.

“Bridgers.”

“What?”

“Phoebe Bridgers, I remember now, I know her boyfriend Marshall.”

She lifts her head in acknowledgement, “You guys in the studio tomorrow?”

He nods, thumbs rubbing across her hip bones, “Yeah, I was hoping you could come in and give some pointers.”

“Different genres,” She shakes her hand as if to dismiss the idea, “I won’t be any good with country rock.”

“Your voice would better suit country. You have like this,” He pulls a weird face to try and make an example, “This sort of high pitched twinge, at the end of long or high notes. Sometimes you control it,” He sees the look on her face and quickly shakes his head, “No, no, it’s good. It’s what gives you that edge, that special sound that is only you.”

She shakes her head and reaches into her pocket for her phone, “I’m gonna give her a call, see if she wants to meet up.”

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ

February 28th 2015

“Hey.” Phoebe grins, holding the door open for her, “Come on in.”

She looks around the little studio, watching as some people play around with instruments, “You recording? EP?”

“No,” She shakes her head picking up her acoustic guitar, “Got one song on a Lost Ark album.”

“What’s it called?” 

“Waiting Room, wrote it a while back, wanna hear?”

She nods and moves over to sit in the chair by the mix board, Phoebe leans over her to hit play and she lifts the big bulky headphones up over her head to listen.

Phoebe watches intently, sitting beside her as she watches her nod her head up and down, miming the lyrics a little.

Of course she knows who Tommie is. She’s not stupid, everyone’s heard of the 1975 in her band so it was only a matter of time. She just didn;t want to seem like a psycho fan going up to her yesterday.

“Can I make a suggestion?”

Phoebe nods quickly, “Of course, you’re the expert.”

Tommie brushes the comment off before asking, “Is this saved? I don’t want to change anything if you don’t like it.”

“It’s saved, three different copies.” She nods then moves forward.

“The drums, I think they should come in a little later instead of straight away,” Phoebe watches as she moves the mouse on the screen to remove the drum beat, instead of cutting it she delays it, “And you have a great voice, don’t hide it behind layers of instruments, make it the focus point.”

She pushes up the volume of Phoebe’s voice, pulling down the guitar and backing drums, “The guitar is great, did you write that?”

She nods quickly, “I did.”

“It’s amazing, how long have you been playing for?”

Phoebe shrugs, “Uh, I’m not sure, a long time.”

“Can I make another suggestion?” She nods again, gesturing to the board but Tommie turns to her instead, “Write more songs like this. Caleb said you’re in a band, Sloppy Jane?” Phoebe nods again, “I listened to some of their stuff, they’re good, but I think you’re better.”

Phoebe lifts her shoulders at that, “So what leave them?”

Tommie shrugs, “I’m not telling you to do that, but I do think you’d be better as a solo act, or at least with other singers that compliment you, not try to outshine you. You have a beautiful voice, don’t let it be silenced.”

“What if I told you the same? Told you to leave the band would you?”

Tommie thinks it over then shrugs her shoulders, “I’m not a solo act. I like being in the background, and by the way you’re performing in those youtube videos, you like being up front.”

Phoebe smiles, “Would it be cheeky if I asked you to record it with me?”

“This song?” She nods and Tommie sinks back into her chair, the confident producer persona she just had fading, “It’s your song, Phoebe-”

“Please?” She asks, “I won’t put it anywhere, just for us?”

“Okay.”

Tommie was in the studio with Phoebe for hours, after the first two hours where Phoebe spent their time teaching her the guitar tune, the band had left.

They played around with different instruments, isolated vocals, harmonised together perfectly until the sun went down and it was nearing one in the morning.

Tommie leans back in her chair with a successful grin and Phoebe leans over to hug her back into her chest.

“Thank you.”

“I had fun. Thank you.”

“Here,” Phoebe moves to download a copy onto one of the memory sticks before handing it over to her, “Who knows, maybe years in the future we’ll both be world class famous rockstars and they’ll dig this up from the archives.”

“Who knows.”

taglist

@thereisaplaceintheheart, @indierockgirrl, @sofaritsalrightt, @julezs-bl0g, @eaglestar31, @sophinthealpss, @noacfemcel, @if-my-heart-bleeds, @befrwime, @fallingforel, @sexorchocolateorpillowsorclouds, @3terna15unshin3, @1975sophie1975, @thesocraticjunkiewannabe

-let me know if you want to be added :)

[thefrontofmymind]

Might As Well 5; Is This Town Worth Living In?

matty healy x videographer!reader

WC: 5252

masterlist

You treated it like a job. An unpaid, harrowing job. Every gig you would act as roadie for the band; driving to the gig in Matty’s van–wordlessly–setting up all their equipment, cheering as loud as you could for every song, and then packing it all up and going home again. It broke your heart, this professional partnership with Matty. It wasn’t working, even with minimal words between you, so much was being said.

I love you.

I miss you.

Me too.

I know but it’d never work.

I don’t care.

You’d begun working on some new ideas for music videos with him. You needed something to talk about apart from yourselves. It was an alright distraction, it’d fill the time of the long drives to pubs in the city, one weekend you even made your way to Sheffield for a gig once. Months went by, and it felt like your life was passing you by, but the only real thing was those drives. Even with your skin itching and your heart breaking, Matty’s presence brought you comfort.

It was beginning to get warmer, the sun was staying up later and you didn’t mind the windows down as Matty drove. The rest of the guys had to take off early, all citing different excuses, though you knew they all thought it a bother to have to pack up all the equipment. George once told you he was just waiting for when they were famous and they could have a whole team sort it out for them.

You were trying to fit all of the equipment in the back of the van, always a game of tetris. You’d even taken off your signature high-tops, as much as you loved them, that weren’t exactly the most flexible of shoes. You had to talk to him, really talk to him. You couldn’t stand not talking to him for much longer.

“Hey,” you said to him as you were going back and forth with boxes and cables and cases, but it came out more like a question. Matty hummed in response, matching your cadence. “I…have news…”

“What? You’re pregnant or something?” He joked. You loved to see him laugh with you.

“No! God no!” You laughed. “Do you think you’ll ever get out of here?”

“Wilmslow?” He asked. You nodded. “I hope. One day. Why? You thinking about leaving?”

“I’ve got an offer for a film school in Brighton.”

“Oh my god!” He answered. “That’s amazing! You should go for it!”

“You think?”

“Of course! If you think this’ll be your ticket, you should go for it. And yeah, it’s far from home and all that, but there is nothing stopping you from visiting us all!”

“I guess…I’m going to Brighton!”

“It’d be nice, at the seaside…You could get a tan…”

“Yeah,” you answered. “It will be.”

It felt like a weight off your chest. Being alright with Matty. You’d found a spot somewhere between friends and nothing that was comfortable. You would engage in light chitchat, small talk, and anything regarding creative endeavours, but nothing else was on the table. If he wanted to know how Chris and the rest of your family was doing, he could ask them, and likewise.

You felt content. Happy, even. You were settled in what you called ‘your life for now’. You had friends, your health, and you were on the road to university in just a few months and you would live a life that you were proud of. You’d have no idea it would all come shattering down with a simple private message.

Justine McIntyre

hi! i have a question?

You were intrigued. You did a quick scan of this Justine’s profile. She just seemed like a normal girl your age from Cardiff. She probably knew Dylan or something, maybe a friend he went to school with or something.

hellooo wats goin on??

Immediately you a response. Almost faster than you think any person could type.

how do you know dylan?

You typed an answer.

hes my boyfriend. r u a mate of his?

Ping! An answer that shocked you to your core.

hes MY boyfriend!

omg that cheating cunt!

You didn’t answer. You couldn’t answer, your hands were shaking too much to make any sense. Your vision blurred and it felt like a vice was around your throat.

You closed your laptop and got under your bed sheets. And you just cried. You couldn’t fathom it, the first guy to ever like you and make an effort, and it was all an act. You let out silent sobs, tears flowing down your face and onto your pillow. You could’ve been just crying and staring at the ceiling for hours.

It was late by the time you’d gotten so dehydrated that the tears had no option but to stop. It was dark outside and the rest of the house sounded quiet; at least from what you could tell in your disconnected state.

You put on your shoes, grabbed your keys, and left your room. You needed fresh air, you needed to think.

You weren’t even thinking of being scared of walking alone in the dark. It was like your brain turned onto autopilot as you walked. You kept going over everything, every action, every sentence, every kiss and more, in your head. How much of it was real?

You knew after a while that if you stopped, your legs just wouldn’t start again, so you kept going. And going, and going.

A familiar house came into view. Surely Mr and Mrs Healy wouldn’t mind a case of light breaking and entering. You’d yet to meet them, but from what you heard they were lovely and understanding people. You quietly opened the gate into the back garden. And lo and behold, the light of the shed was on.

You knocked on the door, and after hearing a faint ‘what is it?’, you opened it. Though it was like something was stopping you from crossing the threshold, so you stood in the doorway. It took a couple seconds for Matty to react. He was lounging on the small sofa, guitar in hand and notebook and pen in front of him. 

He looked up at you, he knew something was wrong the second he laid eyes on you. He quickly stood up and approached, when you just crumbled into him, sobbing all the way through. And he simply held you while you cried, a comforting hand firmly rubbing your back.

“Tell me what’s happened,” he said as you began to calm down.

“He has another girlfriend…in Wales…he’s cheating on me…” You answered between sniffles. Matty didn’t say anything, just enveloping you in an even tighter hug–if that was possible. “How could I be such an idiot?”

“You’re not an idiot. He is,” he answered. “You did nothing wrong…”

You began to actually feel at ease in Matty’s hold. You could breathe again.

“Do you wanna…” He pointed behind his back. “Come inside?”

You nodded and he finally let go of you. You walked inside and settled on the sofa. You tried to take a peek at the notebook, but Matty closed it and put it off to the side before you could see. All you noticed was a very short title scribbled at the top of the page.

“Not finished yet…” was all he said before going back to fiddling with the guitar, random little riffs he was coming up with. “Do you…want to talk about it?”

You sighed. “A girl messaged me on MySpace, asking how I knew him, so I told her that he was my boyfriend, and then she was like ‘what? He’s my boyfriend’, and I just…” You put your head in your hands, trying to stop the tears from brimming again. “Then I walked here.”

“You walked?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, darling…” He put the guitar down again–gently–and pulled you into him. It felt like a new home for you there against his chest. “I’m so sorry…”

Somewhere in the cosmos, the fates were looking in on you; as you were pressed against his chest, looking up at his sorrowful face, you had a choice ahead of you. You couldn’t take it. You wouldn’t take it.

You quickly moved from his grasp, mentally kicking yourself for even thinking about leaning in, and finally kissing him–after a year of friendship you were so close to throwing it all away. It would’ve been a dumb, rash decision that you would regret once you calmed down. You thought long about it in the past, you knew Matty’s feelings on the matter. But it just wasn’t right, you couldn’t kiss someone else while you were in a relationship–no matter the worsening condition of it.

You sat a good foot away from Matty and told him everything. Really just unloading on him–though he was happy to be on the receiving end. You couldn’t help but go on a long spiel, explaining how hurt you were, how the first time you trusted someone enough to let them in, they just had to hurt you anyway. You told him about your childhood, growing up with separate parents, that you promised yourself you wouldn’t let yourself get into a position like your mum, alone raising two kids after their dad ran out on them for greener pastures. 

It was so cathartic, you’d never told anyone how you felt about it all–not even Chris, your one confidante who understood how you felt because he was feeling it too. After it all, you let out a big sigh, a weight was off your chest.

“Do you want some advice?” He asked.

“If you’re giving it out.”

“You can’t keep hurting,” he started. “You have to cut off this pain at the source.”

“Dylan?”

He nodded. “You need to tell him it’s over.”

“I know…”

You began to think, to plan. You decided it was best to do it in person. You wanted to look him in the eye and really talk to him. And you just couldn’t act before that, you had to treat your life like he hadn’t done what he did. You wouldn’t stoop to his level, you wouldn’t act on your urges, no matter how much it seemed like the universe was begging you to kiss the boy across from you.

You spend most of your time in hiding. Secluded to your room while you thought everything over. Dylan had still been texting you like normal, you answered in short, curt sentences but he didn’t seem to notice. 

You broke the news to Chris, to which he gave you a hug and called him a prick. You begged him not to tell your mum and stepdad why you two broke up, you didn’t want either of them to kick off. On the first evening of your solitude your baby brother, Luke, gently knocked on your door and shuffled inside your hole of a room.

“I want you to know I would never cheat on a girl,” he said.

“Thanks, mate,” you answered, not moving from your spot under your covers. He was a sweet kid, and he always knew what to say to make you feel better–as best he could.

You got a message from Ross, saying he hoped you were okay–he was quickly becoming a comfort to you, someone who you could rely on–indicating that either Matty or Chris had spilled the beans.

You didn’t speak to Matty. You couldn’t speak to Matty. There was so much running through your head, you couldn’t think straight. After an entire year of friendship, you were convinced you were happy with just that, but simply watching him, looking at the photos you’d taken at small gatherings and gigs, it made your heart flutter–more than Dylan had ever done. You just didn’t know what to say. You probably typed up a thousand messages explaining how you were feeling, what you were going to do. But in all honesty, you just couldn’t put a name on the pain running through you. You wished you could take a several-day long nap and you could wake up and all your problems would be solved for you. All you knew you had to break up with Dylan, that was obvious. 

Part of you was hoping it wasn’t real and she was just some weirdo who wanted some attention–even though this Justine was posting photo after photo with Dylan and his friends, and they all seemed very chummy with each other in the comments. You couldn’t help but read each and every one of them, each giving you another stab to your heart. You managed to get a train ticket down a couple weeks ahead. You just had to wait.

For now, you tried to keep yourself busy. Films, music, your own personal projects. It wasn’t working all that great, but you had no other option. You tried to immerse yourself in your favourite films, comfort movies you would save for rainy days or when you were sick.

You sunk further and further into your mattress on one particularly hard day, Dylan hadn’t answered any of your messages–something that you used to not bat an eye at, an often occurrence, but now you could only imagine what he was getting up to. You were under your covers, it was getting warmer outside but you didn’t mind the thin sheen of sweat over you if it meant you could be cosy. You were watching one of your favourite movies, Alice In Wonderland, you loved the colours, the needlessly nonsensical dialogue, and the all-over plot. It was the perfect movie to get lost in, you’d loved it since you were a kid.

There was a knock at the door. You figured it was someone in your household bringing you a cup of tea or just asking how you were going–normal procedure over that past couple days. You called out a small ‘come in’ and the door creaked open. The mop of hair you were desperately trying not to think of was standing at the precipice. 

“Hey, Healy,” you said, trying not to notice the jump in your chest.

“How are you, kid?” He asked, quickly walking to sit on the edge of your bed.

“I’ve had better days.”

He chuckled, turning to see what was playing on your small TV that sat on top of your chest of drawers. “Wow! Alice In Wonderland! I haven’t seen this since I was…little.”

You patted the mattress next to you–almost on instinct–and he got the idea, kicking his Vans off and shuffling to lay next to you, a position you had become quite familiar with on your occasional movie nights together.

You were trying to watch the movie, but you couldn’t with all your focus on Matty’s breath. In and out, in, laugh, and out. His arm rested on top of your duvet, your leg underneath it, your skin felt like it was tingling, almost like frostbite.

Eventually, you weren’t even watching the movie, just his face as he laughed at all the antics on the screen. You could see just a little bit of stubble in patches across his right cheek, his front teeth were just a little crooked, his eyes were the kind of brown that was so deep, you wanted to take a dive into them. You noticed things you hadn’t seen before. He was becoming more and more of a person in your mind, he was real.

A shock of terror ran down your spine as he locked eyes with you, a smirk at catching you staring. You didn’t say anything, just quickly whipped your gaze back to the film. You heard a small, breathy chuckle from beside you, drilling a hole into your mind.

Deep breaths. No tears. You’ll be okay. You told yourself over and over on the train ride. You could feel your entire body shaking with anxiety, including your internal organs…somehow.

You heard your phone ping, a text. It was your mum.

hi sweetie! sorry i couldnt get out of work to drive you. were all here for you xox

You smiled at the message. You didn’t exactly tell your family why you felt the urge to go see your dad for a random weekend only mere weeks before you would be on summer break, but they could infer. Your stepdad had given the biggest, most comforting hug you’d ever gotten from him at the train station, and a reassuring, “we all love you.”

As the train hauled to a slow stop, your heartbeat got faster. Some of the passengers on your carriage began to get up and get ready to go on with their lives outside of this metal tube–in the slow kind of way that hopefully by the time they were ready, the doors will have opened. But not you. You brain was going at a million miles a minute, going over all the things that could go wrong, including but not limited to accidentally punching him in the face, finding out a close family member of his had just died, and of course, finding out that he wasn’t cheating on you and it was all just a big misunderstanding. Though now you just wanted it over, you’d convinced yourself it was the best option. You were getting ready to go off to uni, you needed some time to grow and so on.

The doors opened and you knew there was no escape, you just had to face it. You grabbed your bag from the rack above your seat. 

You saw your dad standing not far beyond the entrance of the station. Without even thinking about it, you were bounding towards him, engulfing him in the biggest thing imaginable. You hadn’t told him much of what was happening, just that you really needed to come down to Llandough and quickly.

“Shall we head off then?” He asked, to which you nodded. “I thought we could get pizza for tea, we can pick it up on the way.”

You always loved visits with your dad. Now almost a year on from your first trip to see him, you’d fallen into a routine, and he always knew how to make each time you saw him special.

You spent the evening trying to distract yourself. Pizza and old movies with your dad. You quickly learnt that he was as much of a cinephile as you were. Boxes and boxes of DVDs and VHSs surrounded his office. Everything from the top action blockbusters, to obscure documentaries, he loved it all.

You settled into the sofa for the evening, pizza box on your lap and cheesy garlic bread on a plate on the coffee table in front of you. It was your dad’s turn to choose a film that night–you’d been taking turns picking, he went for a movie from when he was a kid, a murder-mystery, ‘Murder By Death’. You tried to savour the night as best you could, knowing there’d be suffering tomorrow.

With every step closer to the park, your breathing kept getting more and more shallow. In a dream world, you could turn right around and run back home. But you had to do this, it wouldn’t be fair to go on like how you were. 

You thought for sure that Dylan already knew, this girl must have told him. And if you heading down on such short notice wasn’t a clue that there was some kind of urgency, you didn’t know what was.

You saw him sitting under a tree. Your tree. Though now you supposed you could be content with just calling it his.

Once he saw you approaching him, he stood and met you in the middle. He gave you a half-hug and a kiss on the top of your head. It caught you by surprise at just how awkward and forced it all felt. Was it always like this? You sat down on the grass next to him. He was smiling at you, you almost felt like the bad guy here.

After some chit chat, how you were both doing and whatnot, you thought it best to get down to business.

“I…got a message on MySpace,” you started.

He hummed and nodded intently.

“It was from this girl…Justine.”

He sighed. “I know…”

“So what she told me was true? About you?”

“Well what did she tell you?” What kind of game was he playing here?

“She told me that you’re a cheating rat, that’s what.”

He didn’t reply, and kept avoiding eye contact by playing with the blades of grass between his fingers.

“What the fuck is your deal?” You didn’t realise how much anger was suddenly bubbling up. “Why did you do it?”

“What? Like you’re not fucking Matt back home?”

You scoffed. “I would never do that to-to someone I trusted! Someone I loved!”

“Don’t act like you never even thought about it, love, I’m not blind.”

“What if I thought about it? I have-had you! You were it for me.”

“Listen…” He shuffled and grabbed your shoulders, finally looking you in the face. “It was never gonna work out with us, you knew that.”

Tears began to form in your eyes, you were speechless.

“How could it? We’re hours apart from each other…we see each other like once a fortnight…And we’re about to go off to uni anyway, don’t you want to experiment and all that?” He continued.

“Why did you start this in the first place then? If it was going nowhere?”

“Because it…was fun? It’s not like we were gonna marry each other.”

“So you cheat on me.”

“I guess…”

“I would say it was nice knowing you but…this is the worst another person has ever made me feel.”

“Sorry,” he said quickly.

You got up to leave. You really had nothing else to say to him, you thought.

“Just one more thing,” you started. “Did she break up with you too? For cheating on her?”

“She did.”

“Good,” was all you could say. 

You walked as quickly as you could back home. It was the kind of walk where you felt like if your legs stopped moving, they wouldn’t start again, so you just kept going; inside the house, up the staircase, and to your “bedroom”, before collapsing onto the bed in a flurry of tears and sobs.

After a few moments, you managed to calm down. You thought it was probably just the shock of it all. The realisation that it was real. You were cheated on by your first boyfriend, and he broke your heart. 

You couldn’t help but replay that last conversation, everything you said to each other. You were surprised at just how well you held it together, and at an admission you made–something you hadn’t even thought about much.

You’d never quite confessed it, even to yourself, but it was the truth. At times, you’d fantasised about Matty. You’d heard the stories, you knew what kind of guy he was, and it intrigued you. 

Sure, anytime you’d made any kind of physical contact with him it sent a shiver up your spine, and yeah, you’d felt a pang of jealousy when he’d talk about any other girl. But you would never act on it, you’re in a relationship–were, you were in a relationship.

And last you knew, he liked you, and you knew that you liked him, and there was nothing in the way of stopping you from…acting on it.

Suddenly you couldn’t wait to get back to Wilmslow.

You got back on Monday morning–you were pretty much finished with all of your college projects so you knew it was fine to miss a day. Chris was gracious enough to drive all the way to the station to pick you up. You two made light smalltalk on the way home, fighting over the radio station and pointing out the paddock of horses on your way home–you felt normal and actually mentally alright for the first time over that weekend.

You spent the day in your room, surrounded by your creature comforts. Slowly you could feel your heart come back together, piece by piece.

There was still one issue, glaring you from the corner of your vision. You tried not to focus on it. Him.

You needed…to get your head straight, you needed some time to not think with so much pressure. You called the first person who came to mind with the thought of ‘no pressure’.

“What?” He picked up within two rings.

“George! Are you busy?”

“Um…Not really.”

“Would you wanna…” How do you phrase this? “Go somewhere and get high?”

“Yeah,” he answered, very nonchalantly. “I’m supplying?”

“Please, I’ll pay you back.”

“I’ll be right over.” And he hung up.

Very soon, you could hear the sound of a clanky, old engine outside the front of your house. Then your phone rang.

“Hello?”

“I’m here,” he said. You could feel his apprehensiveness through the phone.

“I’ll come down in a second, we can go to the park or something?”

“Okay, yeah, sounds good.”

With a loud announcement to the rest of the house of your departure, you were out the door and into George’s car–a small Toyota that had an overwhelming smell of weed and was in desperate need of a vacuum.

After some quick directions on how to get to the small paved area in the park that you’d sat at, getting high with Matty. Matty.

George lit a joint he got from the glovebox, taking a couple puffs before handing it to you–now getting comfortable, sitting cross-legged in the passenger seat.

“So…” He started. “What’s up?”

“Well-” You exhaled. “I broke up with Dylan.”

“Good. He was a dick!” He laughed.

“He was a bit, wasn’t he?” You joined in on the laughter. 

“We-uh-all got bad vibes from him.”

“Like what?” You couldn’t get over how cathartic it felt to speak to someone the way you were, a real friend who you could actually be honest with.

“Take it from a guy-” He gestured to himself. “He didn’t seem…invested. In you.”

“Yeah…” You had to agree, given the circumstance that led to the end of the relationship.

You spend so long just chatting back and forth, even when the weed ran out, the conversation didn’t. It felt good to find…an equal, a friend without any pretences; you barely felt any anxiety in talking to him, it all just came so naturally to you.

It was beginning to get late, you had to get home for dinner. So George drove you back home with a friendly farewell, and you went to sleep that night just a little easier with the relief of getting a lot that was weighing on you finally off of your chest.

You exchanged cordial texts with Matty over the next couple weeks, but you didn’t see him–the band hadn’t had a gig all that while so you weren’t quite forced to see him. He knew your position–now single–and it would only be a matter of time before you would be in the same room again. You were curious on how he would react, how he did react.

You wouldn’t have to wait much longer, Ross was having a little get together for his twentieth birthday, just the guys, you and some other close friends.

It felt good to get all dolled up and ready for a party again, living in seclusion had its drawbacks at times, you were yearning for some social interaction. Chris drove you both there, but not before a comment from him about how it was good to see you up and about.

Ross’ house was thumping with bass inside, you could see some familiar faces around the living room, as well as some of his family that you politely greeted and told your name with a firm handshake. It wasn’t long before you settled in the back garden in a circle of the “kids” your age, passing round fags and light chatter.

Somehow, at some point of the night, Matty ended up next to you. You said a polite “hi” to him, causing butterflies to erupt in your stomach. You’d never felt like this before, this anticipation.

As the evening ticked onwards, the drinks flowed more and more. Without thinking much on it, you found yourself leaning onto Matty’s shoulder. Eventually he put an arm around you to steady you, but you only used it as an opportunity to lean even further.

“You alright?” He asked in a whisper, not audible to anyone else in the group over the music and admittedly loud, drunken discussions in front of you.

“Yeah, tired,” you answered.

“D’you want me to take you home? Not had a drink in a while.” He pointed to the empty beer bottle on the floor next to him, it had been sitting there for a couple hours at least.

“Can we go back to your house?”

“You wanna do that?”

“Yeah. I know I do.”

In a flash, you’d said goodbye to the rest of the party, in his van, and back to his house. At some point in the short drive you’d gotten the giggles, and now Matty was desperately trying to shush you to keep you from waking the entire house up.

After stealthily–as stealthily as you could–making it up to his room, you took off your trusty boots and practically launched yourself onto his bed. It was soft and smelt like him, you were in heaven.

“Do you want some toast?” He whispered. You fervently nodded. “Okay, just be quiet and stay up here.”

You did as you were told. Sitting on his bed and just taking in the room, you’d never been in his bedroom, let alone his house, before. You smiled at his bookshelf, mostly full of books you’d never heard of before, and then a small stack of DVDs to one side of it, all recommendations you’d given him. You saw not one, but two guitars sitting proudly in one corner–an acoustic and a dark red electric. Soon enough, the door let out a miniscule squeak, notifying you of Matty’s re-entry.

“I made you two slices, one with butter and one with jam, I didn’t know what you wanted.”

“Thank you,” you answered, taking the plate and resting it in your lap.

Matty sat down next to you and just watched you eat, though you were a little too preoccupied in trying to figure out if the jam was strawberry or raspberry flavoured to notice.

“Could I…” He started, a cautious hand out in front of him. “Pinch a piece?”

You let out an enthusiastic hum and held out the plate to him, he opted for a butter-y piece. You were surprised at how relaxed you were, it all felt natural, just eating toast in silence.

You finished the plate and placed it onto his nightstand.

“Good?” He asked.

“Yeah,” you answered. “I feel more…sober now.”

He laughed. “Good.”

“I never actually properly told you…” He looked confused. “I broke up with him.”

“Yeah…”

“And I’m single now.”

“I figured.” He was acting so nonchalant.

“So if something were to happen with someone else, it would be okay.”

“Do you want something to happen?”

Maybe you weren’t as sober as you thought, because the next words out of your mouth would never happen without some kind of liquid courage.

“I wouldn’t have asked to come back to his place if I didn’t.”

With that, he launched towards you and then his lips were on yours.

[invisibleicewands]

Michael Sheen says 'it fills my heart' in passionate message about Wales that will give you goosebumps

Michael Sheen has been reflecting on what it is he loves about Wales ahead of his debut as Aneurin Bevan in new stage drama Nye - and his passionate message is enough to give you goosebumps.

Speaking to WalesOnline ahead of the play’s Cardiff run, Sheen opened up about why he keeps coming back to Wales and indeed now lives here again, even though his work takes him all over the world. “It’s my home,” he says. “It's where my family are, where my friends are, where I grew up. It's the country whose history is closest to my heart, whose people I care about the most, the communities that I care about the most. It is what shaped me, informed me, and what continues to shape and form me.

“Aside from anything to do with the natural beauty of the country, the warmth of the people, the history of the communities, how we grew up here, the challenges that we've had in the past and that we still face and that have shaped who we are now and why we are the way we are now and what our aspirations are, all of those things. [Wales is] what fills my head and fills my heart.”

The Newport-born, Port Talbot raised actor is recognised for his ability to transform into his characters, notably real life people like former Prime Minister Tony Blair, broadcaster David Frost, and controversial football manager Brian Clough.

Sheen, 55, who has more recently played Chris Tarrant in ITV drama Quiz and the angel Aziraphale in Good Omens opposite David Tennant, is now looking forward to starring in the title role of Nye, a co-production between the Wales Millennium Centre and the National Theatre, which sees the actor portray the founder of the National Health Service.

Interestingly, Nye will be the first time that Sheen performs on stage in his home country. Despite his groundbreaking performance as Jesus Christ in National Theatre Wales' The Passion which was staged on location across Port Talbot during Easter weekend in 2011, the actor revealed he's never actually fronted a show at the Wales Millennium Centre in Cardiff.

“To be able to do this play and tell this story about this man on that stage is really exciting,” Sheen commented. “When we got there to start doing the tech and just stepped out onto the stage, it was really exciting. You could feel the whole company getting really excited and just looking out into that beautiful auditorium and just thinking about it being full of people coming to watch this play.

“The fact that we're telling this story, which is such a Welsh story about a Welsh legend, has been exciting from the very beginning. When we first started rehearsing, knowing that we'd be coming to Wales at the end of it, everyone was incredibly excited about that. To now actually be here and be just days away from starting the performance is quite thrilling.”

Sheen said that, perhaps for the first time in his career, he knew ‘everything’ about the man he was playing. A new play written by Tim Price, a synopsis for Nye reads: “Confronted with death, Nye's deepest memories lead him on a mind-bending journey back through his life; from childhood to mining underground, parliament and fights with Churchill in an epic Welsh fantasia.”

Sheen said of playing Bevan: “In the last 10 years I've come to really appreciate who [Aneurin Bevan] was and what he did and what he achieved. This was an opportunity to be able to put everything I knew and felt about him into a piece on stage.

“It’s a very particular challenge playing a real person who is very well known by the audience. That brings all kinds of unique challenges that you wouldn't normally get if you're playing a fictional character, obviously, or a real life person that people don't really know that well. And with playing Nye as well, it feels like a huge responsibility. I mean, it's a privilege to play him and to tell his story, but it's also a massive responsibility because there have been very few things out there about him, and it's such an important story.

“I already had such a strong feeling about him, a strong relationship to him and what he achieved. I know people who feel incredibly passionate about him and what he did. That brings an even greater level of responsibility to it. It was a great relief to know that once we started performing the play, people were accepting of me playing the part and were enjoying it and felt that it portrayed Bevan in a way that did him justice.”

Sheen added that the NHS itself has “always” been there for him throughout his life, citing moments in which he has lost family members and friends, as well as caring for his two children with Swedish actress partner Anna Lundberg, Lyra and Mabli. “It's not just one moment, it's a lifetime, lifelong relationship.”

Another relationship that Sheen has developed in recent years is with Doctor Who star David Tennant. The pair have been firm friends since appearing in both Staged and Good Omens with each other – both of which were hugely successful. Of his friendship with Tennant, Sheen jokes: “David and I will keep working together as long as we don't fall out!” While he ruled out more episodes of Staged, Sheen will reunite with Tennant when the third and final series of Good Omens enters production next year. When asked whether he knows what the future holds for his character, the actor said: “I know what's going to happen in the entire story but I'm not going to tell anyone.”

Before then Sheen will take on another real life role, playing Prince Andrew in a new series about the infamous Newsnight interview the royal did with Emily Maitlis. The story was adapted into Netflix film Scoop earlier this year: “I thought Rufus was fantastic,” Sheen said of Rufus Sewell’s performance as Prince Andrew in Scoop. “I thought he was brilliant as Andrew, he was much better than me. He was more a supporting character in that though. Our story is about Prince Andrew and Emily, it's much more they are the lead characters. It's a different focus and requires a different approach to the character. I was having to look at, as I'm sure Rufus did, the interview in particular. When we were working on it I was listening and watching the interview multiple times a day, every day for months.”

Reflecting on playing the divisive member of the Royal Family, Sheen said: “The level of controversy in that story brings an extra layer as well. The fact that for whatever all our personal opinions might be about what did or didn't happen, or what he did or didn't do, we don't know for definite. There's been no actual court case. We don't know exactly what happened.

"That requires a real level of sensitivity in how you deal with the story, apart from anything else because of legalities and that stuff, but when I read the script I thought that was handled really well. I thought it was a very clever way of allowing the audience to have a satisfying dramatic experience, but still keeping a level of ambiguity, which I thought was done very well on the script. Playing that character was challenging in all kinds of ways, as it is with every real-life character, but I also had to make certain choices and decisions about what was going on for him in my version.”

2024 has already been a busy year for Sheen as a few months ago, his directing debut The Way was released on BBC One – to mixed reviews. Reflecting on the project, which was shot in Wales, he said: “It was quite extraordinary to be attacked by Conservative ministers in the press on the day that it came out, and then to have right-wing newspapers having a concerted plan to try and smear it.

"We didn't expect that just before it came out the news would come out from the steelworks. It was a huge shock and obviously affected the way people perceive the story of the drama. It was never intended to be a socio-documentary about what was going on at the steelworks. It was my first time directing something and to be able to tell that story and film it around south Wales with an amazing Welsh cast was such a brilliant experience.”

[seeminglyranch87]

Taylor & Travis Timeline

June 2024 - Part 2

June 13 - The Eras Tour, Anfield Stadium, Liverpool, UK N1 - 100th show (x) During the ATW speech, Taylor says that the tour will end in December.

I Can See You x Mine (guitar) & Cornelia Street x Maroon (piano)

Travis at Chiefs Training camp meeting kids sponsored by the Make a Wish Foundation. The little girl is wearing a "Go Taylor's boyfriend" t-shirt that Travis signs.

The Chiefs Super Bowl LVIII Ring ceremony is held in Kansas City. Travis attends with his team and receives his 3rd Super Bowl ring.

Travis below with Quarter Back Patrick Mohomes. The boys are chasing a three-peat!

Taylor is in Liverpool, UK and after her show watches and comments on Chariah Gordon's livestream. I think Taylor really wanted to be there. Travis is pictured below with Chariah Gordon and Mecole Hardman (x)

Travis came up with the winning play of the Super Bowl (x) called the "Tom & Jerry"

Travis likes an IG post from the Pat McAfee Show talking about Travis' future with the Chiefs and his contract extension, while finishing with

"I bet he's inspired as hell by Taylor Swift and what she does. She does all this s***" (x)

June 14 - The Eras Tour, Anfield Stadium, Liverpool, UK, N2

This is What You Came For x Gold Rush (guitar), The Great War x You're Losing Me (piano)

Taylor sings "I survived the Great War" (instead of "we")

ET article about making long distance work for Tay & Trav (x)

The source adds, "They prioritize each other and do anything and everything to make each other happy. Their relationship is genuine and they both want to make it work, so it does."

"Taylor and Travis definitely see a long-term future together and things are continuing to move in that direction," the source tells ET. "Their shared values and love of family keeps them connected."

June 15 - The Eras Tour, Anfield Stadium, Liverpool, UK N3

Carolina x No Body No Crime (guitar) … the murder mashup 😜 & The Manuscript x Red (piano)

June 17, 18, 19 - Tight End University (x)

Travis is given a Taylor Swift inspired rubber duck (x)

June 18 - The Eras Tour, Principality Stadium, Cardiff, UK

I Forgot That You Existed x This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things (guitar) a message for a certain ex (YB) who has been crying boo hoo to the media perhaps ?? & I Hate It Here x The Lakes (piano)

Travis liked this IG post of Taylor's ; )

June 20 - Travis and Jason Kelce attend 2024 Cannes Lions International Festival of Creativity in Cannes, France.

Travis and Jason promote their New Heights podcast with a panel. The Kelce Effect: Exploring New Heights with Travis and Jason Kelce 

Gracie Abrams releases "Us" written with and featuring Taylor Swift. Gracie shares how Taylor had put out a fire in her kitchen the night they wrote this song see footage (x)

June 21 - The Eras Tour, Wembley Stadium, London UK N1

Travis, Jason & Kylie Kelce, Andrea & Scott Swift, Ross Travis, Liam Hemsworth, Erin Andrews, Charissa Thompson and other friends attend. Prince William, Prince George and Princess Charlotte are in attendance.

This is the first photo Taylor has posted of Travis on IG!!! (x)

Travis captured singing along to Lover looking smitten. Taylor playing it up with Travis in attendance and looking over at him throughout the show (x). She appears to be having a brilliant night and leaves back of stage arm in arm with Travis.

Hits Different x Death By A Thousand Cuts (guitar) & The Black Dog x Come Back Be Here x Maroon (piano)

June 22 - The Eras Tour, Wembley Stadium, London UK N2

The VIP tent is packed - Travis, Jason & Kylie Kelce (Jason wearing TS t-shirt) Tom Cruise, Greta Gerwig, Ashton Kutcher, Mila Kunis, David Foster.

ThanK you aIMee x Mean (guitar) & Castles Crumbling feat. Hayley Williams (piano)

June 23 - The Eras Tour, Wembley Stadium, London UK N3

Travis Kelce makes a surprise appearance on stage at Wembley night 3 (x)

Is this real? Did Travis really come out on stage in the intro to "I Can Do It With A Broken Heart"???? I need 13 business days to recover!

Out of the Woods x Is it Over Now x Clean (guitar) & Us with Gracie Abrams (guitar & piano)

Travis and Taylor head out after the show with friends to London's Chiltern Firehouse (x). They are seen leaving at 4am

June 24 - ET online (x). Referring to Travis' Eras Tour stage debut, a source tells ET ...

"Taylor and Travis have recently discussed Travis making an appearance onstage at the Eras Tour, when timing was right, and they finally made it happen, Travis was so excited to support Taylor onstage, and Taylor couldn't be happier to feature him, especially during such a fun, pivotal scene in the show. Travis only had one night of rehearsal, the evening before he performed onstage, and didn't miss a beat. Taylor was beaming from ear to ear as Travis took on the dapper role. The two are hoping he can make a cameo again in the future."

Go to previous update -> June part 1

Go to next update -> June part 3

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