#natalies fuck ass headband >>>>

[27spoons]

Yellowjackets Official Season 3 Trailer

[thebearer]

SPOILERS FOR SEASON 3 AHEAD

just finished episode one of season three & have to share some thoughts.

spoilers below the cut, don’t read if you don’t want spoilers!!!

• first and foremost carmen in copenhagen made my heart soar

• secondly, i knew KNEW he lived with stephen and michelle when he was in new york and i’m so fucking glad they showed it

• richie and mikey after the christmas incident. everyone after the christmas (fishes) incident. made me want to sob

• chef david, personally i think should light himself on fire and die idc. fuck that weird ass mf.

• chef terry???? living breathing angel we love you bestie!!

• luca in a headband and that’s all i gotta say. great day for the luca babes.

•the ENTIRE scene where carmen was in copenhagen and sent mikey a photo of some dish. then mikey proceeds to proudly show it to tina??? and you expected my eyes not to water. for me not to shed tears???

• natalie is a fucking gem and i have never felt so represented as an older sister. forever the peace maker, forever the care taker. i wanted to sob for her already.

• sydney keeping carmen in check. mf really said “do you think she’d want to hear my voice rn?” BITCH??? sydney is the realest for being like “im not talking about her” RIGHT!!! bc why are we talking about clarie rn?? RICHIE IS PRIORITY RN!! carmen’s already pissing me off, in sydney we trust.

• realizing the funeral scene was about mikey made me want to scream and cry. all their acting tho??? too motherfuckin’ notch.

• i want to give marcus the biggest hug in the world and take his pain from him. the waiting room scene. that blank stare hit so fucking hard. felt so raw and so real it made my stomach ache.

• and the scene in his mom’s bed?? I haven’t stopped crying. i’m not usually a big crier but the way that grief and just complete shock and overwhelming feeling was captured and portrayed??

• and can we talk about the plot twist that was carmen serving sydney??? fennel allergy bc he knew chef david’s bland stupid dumb ignorant hateful useless waste of space ass was WRONG and the dish goes to sydney!!! symbolic as fuck and i hope that’s a foreshadow of the season. how they’ll bring the best out in each other.

• lastly, carmen’s neurotic notes. just losing his shit in the restaurant. out of control so now he’s got to get back in control by acting crazy. we’re in for a fucking ride guys, i feel it.

[elwenyere]

Call My Bluff

(Stony ficlet inspired by the prompt from @wired-heartbeats​, “Why are we the only two people relatively good at strip poker here damn it guess I gotta lose on purpose to get this rollin huh”)

“All right, chumps,” Clint said, flicking cards expertly across the table from his perch on the kitchen counter, “the little blind is a sock, and the big blind is an item of outerwear of your choice.”

Of course, since Clint hadn’t suggested they play strip poker until the team had already made a substantial dent in Bruce’s latest batch of home-brew IPAs, some of them didn’t have many choices left at this point. Bruce had managed to hold onto both socks but was otherwise down to just his boxers, a white tee shirt, and a watch. Natasha had discarded a jacket, a headband, and a boot. And Thor and Clint were both surrounded by piles of clothing, though Tony suspected they were actually stripping at a faster rate than they were losing.

Steve, on the other hand, had yet to shed a single item.

It was infuriating, really, because Tony had spent all day reviewing the World’s Most Soul-Deadening Slide Presentations ahead of the Board meeting tomorrow – a meeting for which he’d also promised Pepper that he would stay sober – and so the very least he deserved for so much good behavior was for the supersolider with whom he’d been hopelessly infatuated for the last two years to show a little skin, for Christ’s sake. Instead, the only consolation available was that Tony was playing about as well as Steve, having sacrificed only his tie and a pair of cufflinks to win a button-down shirt from Bruce on the previous hand.

Tony folded early this time around, partially because Clint was squinting one eye in a way that meant he was going to bet big and partially because Tony wanted to watch Steve’s face as he checked the bet. Tony had learned more and more of Steve’s tells over the years: the furrow between his brows that meant he was worried, the crossed arms that meant he was remembering something he couldn’t talk about. The data set grew regularly these days, filling out with the little signs that let Tony predict how Steve was going to move and what he was going to need. But still, for the life of him, Tony could not read whatever it was that flashed across Steve’s face in moments like this one, when he glanced up at Tony as he thumbed the edge of his cards. The expression came and went, leaving a sensation like a hot coal in the center of Tony’s chest.

“It’s my deal,” Steve said finally, and Tony snapped out of his reverie in time to notice that Thor had won the last hand, and Clint was now heading to the pantry to grab potato chips wearing nothing but a pair of purple boxer-briefs.

Natasha, meanwhile, was taking much longer than seemed strictly necessary to relieve herself of a pullover sweater, and Tony suddenly froze in the act of picking up his cards: because how had Natasha given up a sweater? Tony had lost every bet he’d made with her since the days when Natalie Rushman was clearing his schedule for lunch at Carbone, and she had just abandoned her second-largest item of clothing to a pocket-nines bluff from Thor, God of Incurable Credulity? Not fucking likely.

Tony narrowed his eyes as he watched her twirl the discarded sweater in a few graceful circles with her wrist. Noticing his glare, she gave him the tiniest of smirks, her head inclining across the table. Tony followed its direction and saw that Bruce was staring openly, mouth hanging slightly ajar, cards lying untouched on the table.

Well that was an interesting development.

Tony felt a slow grin spreading across his face, and he looked instinctively back toward Steve to see if he had noticed Natasha’s adaptation to the game as well. But when he met Steve’s gaze, the grin stuck, only halfway formed. Because Steve was staring directly at him and wearing an expression that (as Tony had learned through painful experience) roughly translated to: “wearing a parachute would only slow me down.”

Steve dealt the river card without even glancing at it.

“I’d like to raise the bet,” he said. “Nothing shy of two yards of fabric.”

“A rousing challenge!” Thor yelled, slapping his cards down on the table. “I would hate to give way under any less brave an assault.”

“I’m out,” Natasha smiled. “I don’t think I have the kind of action this round calls for.”

Tony twirled his cards between his thumb and index finger, doing his best to pass off the sudden firing of his nerves as indecision over his hand. Steve had leaned back in his chair, but his eyes hadn’t left Tony’s, and whatever look Tony had caught a glimpse of earlier was fixed in place now, making Tony feel vaguely like the arc reactor was overheating.

“I’ll call,” Tony said, drumming his fingertips on the table. Steve finally broke eye contact to look down at the movement, and Tony watched in disbelief as his jaw somehow set even further: like concrete getting pressed into granite.

“I’m uhh – I’m out I think? Yeah, I’m going to fold,” Bruce said.

“Probably the right choice, Banner,” Clint nodded sagely, now back from the kitchen and tossing barbecue chips to himself in the air.

“Okay boys, show us the goods,” Natasha demanded.

“Full house,” Tony announced, laying down a king and a queen.

“Well, you’ve got me there, Tony,” Steve replied. Slowly and deliberately, he turned over his cards to reveal a king and a ten.

A pair of kings? But that was a garbage hand. That meant that Steve –

Steve was reaching down and peeling off his undershirt and sweater in one smooth motion.

“Bad luck, I guess,” he said. And then he gave a shrug that sent an absolutely criminal ripple of movement across his bare chest.

Oh. Oh: that smug, chiseled bastard.

“Deal the cards, Nat,” Tony said, taking care to wet the tips of his fingers with his tongue before he plucked his off the table.

One hand later, Tony was slipping the waist of his pants slowly over his hips. Two hands later, Steve was using more muscles to remove a pair of socks than Tony had known the human body to contain. When Tony retaliated by rolling up his sleeves before peeling off his own socks, Steve ripped his belt off with a speed that made Tony feel like the armor had taken a blow to the head. By the time Tony shimmied his way out of his dress shirt, Bruce had to pretend to bump into the table before Tony remembered there were other people in the room.

“I’m going to head to bed,” Steve said abruptly, tearing his eyes away from Tony’s forearms as he stood up. “Gotta know when your luck has turned.”

“Oh someone’s getting lucky, for sure,” Clint smirked, and then he ducked — almost in time to avoid a projectile potato chip from Natasha.

“Yeah, so I’m just going to…go be over there now,” Tony said, in what he felt was an impressive display of self-possession for someone staring at the retreating ass of Steve Rogers.

“Don’t say I never did anything nice for you, Tony,” Natasha called after him as he scurried out of the room.

He barely made it around the corner and into the hallway before he was being swung around and held against the wall, one of Steve’s hands planted firmly against his chest.

“Took you long enough to get out of that shirt,” Steve growled.

“I could have gotten to the shirt faster if someone weren’t an unrepentant cheater who was dealing from the bottom of the deck – again,” Tony shot back, gripping the loops of Steve’s jeans and pulling their hips together.

“I must have misread your signals then, because I was pretty sure you were interested in what I might do from the bottom,” Steve whispered, his lips teasingly close.

“God, Rogers,” Tony groaned, “how can you be so corny and so hot at the same time? It drives me completely nuts.”

“It does?” Steve asked, the pressure against Tony’s chest lightening as Steve pulled back to search Tony’s face.

“No, Steve,” Tony said patiently, “I just wriggled my hips in front of Clint Fucking Barton because you fill me with incredibly casual, ordinary thoughts. Of course you drive me nuts, you idiot. I’ve been crazy about you for years.”

And that was probably more of a revelation than a race to lose at strip poker merited, but Tony couldn’t regret it, because a totally new expression had bloomed over Steve’s face. As Steve leaned down and pressed their foreheads together, one finger tracing the line of Tony’s jaw, Tony tried to memorize it. Tell: the smile that meant Steve Rogers was happy.

[fanficimagery]

Natalie’s Half-Sister [Part 3 of 3]

Summary: Imagine being surprised by your sister and landing an interview with a hospital all the way in LA. Looks like it's time to finally make a decision- stay in Texas or move out to LA.

Words: 2.9K Warnings: None really. The ending sucks. I started to run low on inspo.

David's trailing after Natalie and Jeff, the three of them walking through the Texas airport to grab their luggage.

"As you can see, guys, we're in Texas to surprise Y/N who we haven't seen in about two months." Natalie and Jeff turn around, flashing peace signs and smiles. "Natalie's here because it's her sister and Jeff is here because he's secretly in love with Y/N."

Jeff rolls his eyes. "Will you stop telling the internet I'm in love with Y/N! She's gonna see this and stop talking to me." His smile completely says otherwise and David laughs as he continues to record.

"That wasn't a denial. You heard it here first, folks. Jeff's got himself a crush."

"Don't be an idiot."

"Whatever. You literally worked your ass off to clear your schedule this week so you could make the trip out here with us."

"Will you two hurry up!" Natalie grumbles. "I wanna make it to Y/N's house before she leaves for the football game."

"What football game?" Jeff asks.

"It's a Friday night in Texas," she says. "High school football is a big thing around here, and Y/N has a nephew in band and another on the football team."

"Well I guess we're going to a football game." David smiles.

          - X - X - X - X - X -

Homecoming is tonight and while you have one nephew playing in the football game, your other nephew who's in band is also running for Homecoming King. You had your entire outfit planned out, but after an unexpected cold front pushed through earlier that morning, the night time temperatures are expected to plummet and you need to rethink a few things.

There's still a couple of hours before you need to leave, so you're relaxing while you can. But just as you've gotten comfortable watching some mind-numbing reality tv show, your doorbell rings. Then quietly groaning, you get up to go see who's there.

As soon as the door is opened, Natalie and Jeff pop confetti cannons and David shouts Surprise!, recording the entire thing. Your mouth drops open, but then you're quick to smile and laugh.

"Oh my god!" Immediately pulling Natalie into a hug, you hug her before switching out for David and then Jeff. "Not that I'm not happy to see you, but what are you guys doing here?"

"I missed you!" Natalie gushed. "And where I go, David goes."

You smile and then look at Jeff, raising an eyebrow at him. "What?" He chuckles. "I missed my best friend."

You coo and hug him again, David giggling. "I caught that on camera. I'm showing Todd."

"Shut up."

Ushering the trio into your house, you help them bring in their bags as Natalie casually mentions just how long they'll be here for. "Okay so I got two spare rooms and a couch. Or if someone wants to bunk together, that's fine too."

"I want the room." Natalie and David say simultaneously.

Everyone looks at Jeff and he shrugs. "I haven't had a good nap or night's rest since Y/N left. If you think I'm sleeping in any room other than hers, you're delusional."

You laugh. "That's good to hear because I was wondering how I was going to wrangle you into my bed without seeming clingy."

You quickly show David and Natalie to their rooms, and then lead Jeff to yours. He whistles as he walks in. "Now this is what I'm talking about," he muses. "Your place looks homey."

"Well I hoped it would. I've lived here for five years."

You meet Natalie and David in the hall, leading the way back towards your living room.

"What's up with this weather?" Your sister asks. "I was expecting heat and humidity like you're always complaining about."

"If you wanted that miserable Texas weather, you should have been here last night. Cold front pushed through this morning and it's only expected to get colder. Especially when the sun goes down."

"So we're going to be sitting in that tonight? Natalie said something about a football game," David wonders.

"Yeah. But not just any football game," you grin. "It's Homecoming which means the stands will be packed, and a King and Queen will be crowned before the game starts. Which speaking of," you then address Natalie. "Devon is running for King."

"Aw. Yay!" She muses.

"Yeah. So if you guys are gonna join, we have two hours to run to Walmart and find you guys hoodies if you didn't pack any."

"Well I guess we're going to Walmart!" David laughs.

          - X - X - X - X - X -

Natalie easily ends up finding an outfit from your closet to wear to the game while the boys opt for their regular jeans and shirts from their luggage, and a hoodie bought from Walmart.

You're finishing getting dressed when David and Jeff enter the room, relief evident in their features when they see you're pulling a high school themed t-shirt atop a black long sleeve rather than having caught you less dressed. Your hair is down and curled, and a sparkly headband drapes across your forehead. Natalie then exits the bathroom in a similar outfit to yours.

"What time does this game start?" Jeff finally asks.

"Seven thirty, but we'll need to get there about an hour or so earlier," you say. Glancing around, you asks, "Has anyone seen my garter?" Their expressions are rather confused, and your eyes roll. "Homecoming garter," you reiterate. "You wear it over your clothes, not under."

"Oh."

You snort at their simultaneous exclamation.

"Is this it?" Natalie picks it up from your bedside table. "Aw. Cute!"

You take it from her, bending down to step into it with your right leg and draw it halfway up your thigh. The artificial, white chrysanthemum has been sprayed with glitter and a small football player and musical notes have been glued on it. Ribbons, at least six inches long and in your old high school colors, hang down. Two ribbons bear the names of your nephews, two others bear the words HOCO 2019, and there are two miniature cow bells dangling.

Your sister and friends stare at it in confusion, and you huff a laugh. "Girls are typically supposed to wear mums that are pinned to their shirts and boys wear garters on their arms, but I don't like pinning something heavy to my shirt and bra strap, so garter it is."

"I've seen memes about mums," David says. "But the ones they show are usually bigger and being held up by a strap around the neck."

"Oh you'll see those," you tell him. "I personally think those are ridiculous, but the teenage girls love them. Just wait and see." Then after slipping your feet into a pair of boots, you make sure you and your guests have everything they need before leaving.

          - X - X - X - X - X -

You luck out and find one of the last parking spaces in the parking lot, and then pull out four small fuzzy blankets from your car trunk. Jeff, Natalie, and David seemed skeptical of you needing them, but after seeing several other people walking in with blankets, they agreed that maybe it was a good idea to have them close by.

You pay for four tickets, after convincing Jeff and David that they could buy dinner later, and then lead them towards the bleachers. They're surprised by how many people have shown up and David is far too amused when he sees just how crazy big the mums get. Then leading them towards your usual spot, close to the band and halfway up the bleachers, you all take a seat and watch as they look around to take in the hyped atmosphere.

"This is crazy!" David laughs, looking around at the packed stands. "I can record. Right?"

"I don't see why not. Just bleep out last names."

"Of course."

Both football teams take the field to warm-up and music blares from the scoreboard speaker.

"Not to be a downer," Jeff says, leaning towards you so you can hear him, "but is your old high school football team even good?"

"Well right now they're five and one," you say. "Tonight should be a good game."

The band soon marches out and takes their place in the stands, as well as the dance team. You clap and cheer for them all, waving at several familiar faces that have made an appearance or three with your nephews at your house. Girls in beautiful dresses start making their way towards the field and Natalie coos at them.

Then just before you can cave and wrap yourself in a blanket, one of the cheerleaders rushes up to you. "Y/N!"

"Hey, Dee. What's up?"

"Devon needs an escort. His mom is not going to make it."

Your eyes widen. "What?"

"Devon really wants you to walk him on the field. He nearly started crying when his mom called."

"Fuck," you curse softly. "Is he sure? I mean, his other aunts are here too. Is he sure he-"

"Yes," Dee assures you, smiling. "So are you in or out? I need to go make the change up in the press box if you agree."

"Do it! Do it!" David gleefully urges you.

Natalie is eagerly nodding and Jeff nudges you. "Go on. I'll keep your spot warm."

"Fine. I'll do it."

As you take off with Dee, Jeff, Natalie, and David remain in the bleachers.

"So what are the odds of Y/N's nephew getting king?" Jeff wonders.

"If I remember correctly, Devon's been in band all four years of highschool."

"So he's a band nerd."

"He's not a band nerd," Natalie chuckles, swatting at David. "He's pretty popular, but I'm not sure he's as popular as the football players running for king as well."

"Okay and what about the football player nephew?" Jeff wonders. "What's his number?"

"Uhh.. fifty-six. Right there." Natalie points him out and the boys hum.

"Geez he's tall," David laughs. "Hopefully he hits hard."

Jeff grins. "Yeah. I wanna see some hard hits."

Time winds down and soon enough the Homecoming court takes the field. Boys are escorted by a female family member and girls a male family member. One by one they're called forward, their extracurriculars listed off and what their future plans after graduation are. Then when Y/N and her nephew Devon are called, Jeff, Natalie, and David join the small group of Devon's family to cheer the loudest.

A prince and princess are named first, the crowd cheering and screaming in delight. Then when it's time for the king, David turns his camera on and zooms in on Y/N and Devon. The crowd seems to hold their breath and then.. Devon's name is called. He's won king.

Natalie jumps up, screaming, and David and Jeff laugh as they join the crowd in cheering Devon on. Pictures are taken, congratulations are given, and soon Y/N joins her guests in the stands.

"Holy shit," you breathe in awe, laughing in disbelief still. "He did it. He really won."

"That's so cool!" Natalie gushes. "I'm so happy he won."

"You and me both."

You take your seat and then ten minutes later the National Anthem is being played, followed by the school songs. You clap along when appropriate and cheer for the football team when they run on the field, yelling for your other nephew Ivan.

The game soon starts, the high school bands do their job of keeping the crowds hyped, and you're constantly jumping to your feet to cheer on your nephew's team. It doesn't take much for Natalie and David to join in with the excitement, and while Jeff is a little more subdued you can still see he's having fun.

Just before halftime, your nephews team is leading by only three points. The visiting band is supposed to perform first, so you, your sister, David and Jeff take the moment to leave your blankets behind while getting in line at the concession stand for some hot chocolate and snacks.

This time when you're seated, you and Natalie take a seat one bleacher lower so the boys are at your backs. You and Natalie cheer on Devon who's performing in the band, and then settle back down for the third quarter. And just as the game gets underway, a small family in front of you starts to have trouble with the cold. Well the parents don't, but their children do. And feeling guilty, you unwrap your blanket from around your shoulders and tap the mother on her shoulder. She refuses the blanket at first, but after pushing it on her she accepts and wraps her children in it. They visibly sigh in content and you go back to watching the game, ignoring your sister's beaming smile directed at you.

Arms wrap around you from behind, Jeff using his blanket and body heat to keep you warm. "That was the nicest goddamn thing I've ever seen."

"I felt really bad," you mumble.

"Hashtag couple goals." Natalie laughs at David's remark, and you and Jeff roll your eyes at the camera now directed at you.

Your nephew Ivan ends up making a touchdown in the fourth quarter and his team barely pulls off the win in the end. And by the time the game is over, you're more than ready put your car heater on full blast and drive to the nearest Whataburger before going back home.

Then sitting around a table at Whataburger and fiddling with your half eaten food, you say, "I know this place isn't what you're used to, so I hope you have at least a bit of fun during your stay."

"Trust me, this is perfect," David says. "The partying kind of caught up to me and I've been meaning to take a break from it all." Natalie nods along with his assessment.

"I like a good party," Jeff then says, "but sometimes a person just needs some down time. And their best friend." He nudges you with his shoulder and you huff a laugh. "Don't think too much. We'll be happy to do whatever you want to do."

"I have a couple of interviews lined up this week, but afterwards I'm all yours."

The reunion between your dad and Natalie is a tearful one, and then a regretful one when David and Jeff hit it off a little too well with your dad and brother. David and Jeff thought their friends were bad with the sex jokes, but more often than not you and Natalie were left blushing as the boys died of laughter whenever your dad and brother did their best to embarrass you.

Your job interviews also went fairly well, but you just weren't feeling those particular hospitals. Natalie guessed you were still holding out for something in LA, but you just didn't know. You thought any hospital would do, but apparently you were picky.

The cold weather then proceeded to go away after day three, and your sister and friends regretted taking the cold for granted. Texas heat and humidity were no joke, and they finally got to experience it firsthand. Especially when a severe thunderstorm took everyone by surprise and a bolt of lightning struck a tower nearby, triggering the tornado siren. You'd never seen your sister or David look so terrified, but after a phone call from your dad that the siren was a false alarm, everyone calmed and stayed awake until the storm passed.

Natalie, David, and Jeff only have one more day with you, so they're taking full advantage of being lazy before they have to get back to work.

David and Natalie are laid back in your recliners, dozing off after a fulfilling lunch, whereas Jeff has laid out on the couch with his head in your lap as you scroll through your phone. Your phone dings with a new email and you click over to see whether it's important or spam.

Important. It's important.

"Up, up, up." You tap the top of Jeff's head until he moves, you then standing up. All three occupants of the room glance at you. "I, uh, I need to make a Skype call so please steer clear of my bedroom until I come back out."

Natalie, David, and Jeff watch you go.

"What do you think that's about?" David wonders.

Natalie shrugs. "Dunno. She'll tell us when she's done."

Nearly an hour later, the trio are anxiously waiting. They'd tried eavesdropping through the door, but unfortunately couldn't hear anything.

You finally return to the living room, expression neutral and feeling like there's been a weight lifted off your shoulders. "So," you start, startling them. "I got an email earlier. From a hospital in LA." That seems to pique their interest. "The board of directors wanted an interview with me, but since we're states apart, they had to settle for an interview over Skype."

Natalie slowly grins. "And?"

"They like me." You huff a laugh, your body relaxing as Natalie squeals. "They were impressed with my resumé, and most of that Skype call were the other nurses who'd taken over and gave me a tour of the hospital, as well as introducing me to other members on staff."

"Wait, so you got the job?" David asks, beaming.

You nod, laughing. "I got the job!" Natalie, David, and Jeff all cheer, jumping to their feet and hugging you in congratulations. "The girl whose position I'm taking over still has to finish out her contract, so I won't be starting until mid-January."

"That's awesome," David muses.

"Yeah. So I'll be spending Thanksgiving in Texas and then fly out afterward since the family is all doing something different for Christmas. I don't wanna be pulled in three different directions, and anyways I rather spend Christmas with my sister."

"Yesss! I'm so happy!" Natalie gushes.

"You and me both." You sigh. "I'm so ready to start this next chapter of my life, especially with you guys by my side."