#not me once again disappearing for over a month and returning with no explanation hehe

[sloedancing]

*kissis them*

[haokyeom]

last a lifetime | xu minghao

ミ★ synopsis: sometimes forgiveness doesn’t just mean forgiving another person, it’s forgiving yourself too. aka, in which the virtue of forgiveness helps you forgive yourself and open your heart again.

ミ★ genre: virtue of forgiveness!minghao, angst, some fluff

ミ★ warnings: minor character death, mentions of blood

ミ★ word count: 8,824

ミ★ pairings: minghao x female reader, joshua x female reader

ミ★ notes: hi guys ! it’s lila, aka, @viastro​. you know how it be. uh, this might be one of my favorite oneshots i’ve written? as well as my upcoming oneshot for this collab that’s coming next week hehe. i’m just incredibly proud of this piece even though it is incredibly long. i hope you guys enjoy it, make sure to give minghao lots of love <3

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“Are you seriously going to walk out on me? Without an explanation?” Juyeon asks from behind you, and you clutch the door handle in your hand. You don’t dare turn around, because you know that if you do, you’d fall back into the toxic cycle. 

“Yn, please?” You stare at the wooden door, wondering how the cycle first began. How Juyeon became someone you cared about too much, to the point that you’d die for him if necessary. It’s scary how fast you go to him when he needs you, how you’re the shoulder he cries on every time his newfound relationship didn’t work. What’s scarier is that he could never see how much it hurt you each time.

how could he not see that you loved him? You wonder to yourself. You feel his hand rest on your shoulder, causing your breath to hitch. 

“Please stay, yn.” Juyeon mumbles, staring at the back of your head with tears filling his eyes. He clutches the back of your t-shirt in his hand as a means to make you stay, and it almost works. 

almost.

“I can’t anymore. It hurts too much.” You state, biting the inside of your cheek once a tear falls from your left eye. “What hurts?” Juyeon asks quietly. 

The two of you stand in silence for a moment. With him wondering what he did wrong, and you questioning whether you should simply just risk it all. 

You decide on the latter.

“Loving you, but seeing you fall for everyone else.” You answer, before opening the door and stepping out of Juyeon’s apartment. You quickly run over to the elevator, pressing on the buttons before Juyeon can make it over to you. 

“Yn! Wait!” You hear him call, and you thank the heavens that the doors open just in time. You push the button that closes the elevator doors, and you scream internally at how slow it takes for them to shut. You hear Juyeon’s running feet, and you watch through the sliver of the door, catching his heartbroken expression before they finally close. 

You let out a breath, feeling a sense of pain when the elevator begins to go down. You wonder whether it was better to have talked out your feelings with him, if you should’ve stayed. What would’ve happened if you did? 

no, juyeon doesn’t love you back.

Your thoughts get cut off when the elevator doors open, and you step out into the main lobby. You head over to the entrance, only to freeze when you hear the call of your name. Turning your head, you see Juyeon standing where the stairs are, and your eyes widen. 

“Yn!” You run out the doors, sprinting over towards the crosswalk so that you can get farther away from him. The closer you are to the bus stop, the closer you are to getting away from Juyeon. 

“Yn, please! Hear me out!” Juyeon yells from behind, begging for you to slow down and talk to him. You continue to run, not even thinking twice when you step onto the crosswalk. Juyeon’s eyes widen when he sees that it’s not your turn to cross the street, and he turns to see a truck not making any means of slowing down. 

“YN!” Juyeon screams, running faster to get to you. You finally turn around at the desperate call of your name, a tone you’ve never heard from Juyeon before. Juyeon’s sprinting towards you, yelling words you can’t decipher. You see bright lights out of the corner of your eye, and you glance to your left to see a truck heading straight towards you. 

“Juyeo-” You get cut off when you get pushed out of the way, landing hard on your side. You hear the loud screech of the tires and the slam of the car, and you stare at the ground with wide eyes. The crosswalk light turns green and the signal begins to repeat itself like a mantra. Telling you to walk, walk, walk, as the blood drains from your face when you turn your head to look at what happened. 

The signal soon gets drowned out by the sound of your screams.

you never get to learn what Juyeon wanted to say to you, or why he wanted you to stay.

you still wonder what would’ve happened if you stayed.

three years later

“Yn, I need you to go to the coffee shop down the street and buy four iced americanos.” You glance up from your desk, shooting a glare at Joshua, who simply gives you a bright smile in return.

“Why would I do that?” You ask your peach haired coworker. At first glance he seems like an absolute angel, and could never do anything wrong. After working with him for a year though… you learned he’s the exact opposite. However, you have a lot of love for the guy. Even if he makes you do all his small jobs.

“Cause you love me.” Joshua says in a singsong voice, and you let out a sigh. You look back towards your computer, showing no means of getting up from your desk, and Joshua pouts. “Okay, I’ll treat you to pork belly at that new high-end restaurant when it opens next month if you do this for me.” 

You smirk, turning off your PC and standing up from your desk at the mention of meat. Joshua lets out a sigh, knowing that paying you back in food always works. It’s a win/lose situation for the man. The pro, he doesn’t need to walk down the street to buy the coffee. The con, his wallet pays the price whenever he treats you to food for doing his job for him every time.

“Four iced americanos, correct?” You ask, and Joshua nods his head. You grin, reaching your hand out for him to give you the credit card. To which he carefully places into the palm your hand. 

“I’ll be back in a few.” Joshua gives you a thumbs up, letting out a sigh as he watches you leave the office.

“Maybe I should just buy the coffee from now on.” He mumbles to himself, turning around and walking back over to his own office. 

You step out of the hospital, walking down the sidewalk with your hands in your pocket. The weather is a bit breezy, with the slight winds tousling up your hair. You glance up when you reach the coffee shop, stepping inside as a warm burst of air hits you. 

Letting out a breath, you walk up to the register and order the four americanos. The whole interaction takes less than a minute, and the preparation of the drinks is rather quick as well considering that there’s not many customers at this time. Within fifteen minutes you’re back outside, the wind hitting you as you walk back towards the hospital. 

You’re close to the building when you hear the sound of tires screech, the sound of cars crashing following soon afterwards, and you fall to the ground immediately, the iced americanos spilling around you. You glance up towards the road, seeing a car crash right in the middle of the intersection. Those around you all begin to hurry over towards the site, pulling out their phones to call for emergency services, while you sit there, the memories flashing past your eyes. 

You reach up and cover your ears when the sound of those talking worriedly fills your senses, reminding you of the horrid night. You close your eyes, hoping that it’ll calm you down, but all you can hear is the sound of the crosswalk signal telling you to walk, walk, walk. 

You feel tears fall past your eyes when the sight of Juyeon floods your brain, and you rock back and forth as you try to calm down. Those passing by begin to look at you strangely, all except one. He walks over and kneels down in front of you. He reaches up and rests his hands over yours, startling you into looking up to see who is helping you cover your ears. 

His hair is pitch black, parted down the middle but you can still tell that it’s rather long. His eyes bore into yours, and you get distracted from the noise for a short moment. He mouths the words, it’ll be okay, and for some reason, you feel that he spoke the truth. 

The two of you stay like that for a moment, just staring into each other’s eyes until you feel your heartbeat slowly go back to normal. You close your eyes, lowering your head as you take deep breaths. Suddenly, the feeling of his hands over yours disappear, and you look up to see Joshua staring at you with concern written over his features. 

“Yn, let’s go inside.” He tells you, but you can’t hear him. Joshua lets out a sad smile, mouthing that he’s going to pick you up and that you should just close your eyes. One arm goes under your knees, and the other around your back as he lifts you up from the sidewalk, quickly taking you into the hospital, away from the chaos of outside.

You slowly remove your hands from your ears when the two of you are farther away from the entrance of the hospital, and you wipe away the tears on your cheeks. He steps into the elevator, pressing the button for the sixth floor. You pat his shoulder, signaling that it’s okay for him to let you down, but he just shakes his head. Once the elevator doors open, he brings you over to your office where you counsel your patients.

“I shouldn’t have let you go alone, I’m sorry.” Joshua says sadly, as he sets you down onto the small couch in your office. You shake your head, giving him a small, reassuring smile. 

“It’s not your fault Joshua. I’m sorry for the coffee.” You respond, and he scoffs, muttering how you guys will just order coffee for delivery from now on. Joshua sits down beside you on the couch, turning his head to glance at you, “Besides, that’s not what’s important, yn. What matters most is your mental health.” 

Your breath hitches and you turn away, staring at the childish painting on your wall that was painted as a joke by Juyeon. It’s the two of you as dinosaurs, him holding out a pink flower in your direction. You were never able to tell what the type of flower was, and Juyeon refused to tell you. You ended up keeping the painting though, and you don’t plan on ever taking it down. 

“Can I just be alone for now, Joshua? I’ll talk to you when I feel better.” Joshua lets out a breath, feeling slightly disappointed at the fact that you’re avoiding the topic once again. He hardly knows the story, no one really does. All he knows is that you’re terrified of car crashes, and the sound of the crosswalk signal is a trigger for you. However, he won’t force you to open up.

“Of course, yn. I promise to get you the best pork belly when that new place opens next month.” Joshua tells you, and you give him a soft grin, nodding your head. He gets up and steps out of your office after your response, and you immediately rest your head into your hands, feeling mentally exhausted.

The memory of the handsome stranger who helped you a few minutes prior lingers in your head, and you find yourself wondering who he is, and why he helped you. 

You look through your notes on your last patient, pausing when you hear a knock on your door. Without looking up from your journal you say, “Come in!” 

You hear the door open, and you glance up to see Joshua standing there with a small smile, holding a matcha latte in his hand. He steps over to your desk, placing it beside your journal, settling down in the seat across from you. 

“This for me?” You ask with a smile, and Joshua rolls his eyes at you, knowing that you already know the answer. You mutter a quiet thank you, and he nods his head.

“How was your last patient?” Joshua asks, smiling at your reaction of you pursing your lips. You let out a sigh, taking the latte and taking a sip. You lean back into your seat, giving Joshua a tired look. 

“He told me about his sex life in great detail when I asked how his day was, so that was rather interesting.” Joshua frowns, before breaking out into a laugh that sounds like music to your ears. You find yourself giggling as well, the common effect of Joshua’s contagious laugh. 

“That sounds lovely.” Joshua jokes once the two of you finish laughing, and you stick your tongue out at him. You close your eyes for a moment, feeling tired from a long day, and Joshua lets out a small smile at the sight. 

“You want me to drive you home?” Joshua asks after a moment of the two of you just basking in each other’s company, and you open an eye to glance at him. He chuckles at the sight, and you grin, shaking your head at him.

“It’s okay Joshua, I need to stay a bit later tonight anyways.” You answer, and Joshua nods his head slowly. He stands up from the chair, running a hand through his wavy peach colored hair. You find yourself staring a bit longer than usual, and Joshua takes notice of this. He smiles, “Want me to stay with you?” 

Your breath hitches at the question, and you look down at your desk. Joshua bites the inside of his cheek, wondering if he asked the wrong thing based on your reaction. You let out a shaky breath, before glancing back up and shaking your head at him. “Nah, I know you’re tired too. I’ll see you tomorrow Joshua.” 

He nods his head, reaching out and giving you a soft pat on the head. You smile at the gesture, and he puts his hands in his pockets once he’s done. “Don’t stay too late working. I’ll see you tomorrow, yn.” 

“Night Joshua.” You call when he places his hand on your doorknob. His heart warms at your soft voice, and he opens the door, stepping out of your office. Once the door closes, you’re left alone once again. You let out a tired groan, leaning back into your seat and closing your eyes. 

The incident from last week still recurs in your head. You’ve done a decent job at suppressing the memory of Juyeon over the past three years, but ever since last week you’ve been having nightmares again. The sound of the crosswalk signal plays in your head once you wake up, reminding you of what you dreamt moments before. 

“When are you going to forgive-”

“WHAT THE FUCK!” You scream, standing up from your chair and staring directly at the black haired beauty standing in front of you. You notice that his black hair is a bit wavy this time, a bit curled around the back of his neck. His apparel is all black, and your breath hitches when you realize his black turtleneck is cropped, revealing his toned stomach. 

“You’re the guy from last week.” You mutter, and he nods his head. He glances around your office, hands stuffed into his pockets as he awkwardly stands there.

“How did you get in without making a sound? The door was closed. Wait. How did you disappear last time-”

“If you sit down then I can explain everything.” He states, and you frown slightly. The man lets out a sigh when he sees how apprehensive you look, and he does a quick spin for you. 

“I don’t have any weapons on me if you think I’m going to murder you.” The man tells you, and you purse your lips. He lets out a sigh, showing you his hands, and you take notice of his slender fingers.

“My hands are too pretty to try and choke someone to death as well.” He adds, and you finally sit down in your leather seat after a second of thinking. He sits down in the chair across from you, resting his chin on his hand as he tries to make you out. 

“Are you going to explain?” 

“In a second.”

You raise an eyebrow, and he gives you a small smile. He leans back into the seat and runs a hand through his hair. 

“Well yn, this is going to sound ridiculous, but I’m not human.” He begins, and you frown at him. 

“Yeah, and I’m a furry.” The pretty man pauses, glancing at you to see if you were serious. 

You squint, “I was joking.” 

He nods his head, muttering a quiet, thank god, before continuing. To which you glare, not appreciating the fact that he thought you were serious. 

“Anyways… you know the seven deadly sins I’m assuming, correct?” You nod your head at the pretty man. “How about the seven virtues?” You nod your head again, and he lets out a relieved smile.

“Okay great. That makes this easier. Well, I’m the virtue of forgiveness, Xu Minghao.” You stare at him in silence, and he stares back at you. You close your eyes, resting your head in your hands, and he tilts his head at you.

“Are you… okay?” You look up at him, seeing how he may not really be human even though he looks like it. There’s no way a man can be this pretty and be human at the same time. We humans are not worthy of living alongside a man who is as ethereal as Xu Minghao. 

“No.” You answer after a moment, and he purses his lips. 

“How do I know you’re not lying?” You ask, and he shrugs. 

“I could disappear for you or something.”

“Damn, deadass?”

“Yeah, I’ll do it right now if it’ll make you believe me.”

“Okay, bet.”

You watch as Minghao literally disappears from the seat for a moment, and you stare with a blank face when he appears back in the chair. He raises an eyebrow at how unimpressed you seem to be, opening his mouth to ask what you think, only for you to fall out of your seat.

“YN?!” 

You blink your eyes open, only to shut them with a loud groan as you roll over in bed. You quietly thank God that it was just a weird dream as your hand roams around the sheets, only to pause when you realize you’re not in your bed at all. You sharply inhale when you recognize the leather surface you’re laying on, and you open your eyes when you realize you’re on the couch in your office. You turn your head to see Minghao sitting in the seat across from you. He tilts his head and gives you a soft smile, “Morning.” 

“It’s morning?!”

“Nah, it’s only been about fifteen minutes. I ordered us chicken since you haven’t had dinner yet, and I assumed we’d be here for a while.” Minghao explains as he opens up the cardboard boxes holding the fried chicken. You find yourself unable to argue with the grumble of your stomach, so you sit up on the couch and reach out to grab the small paper plate Minghao set out for you. You place two pieces of chicken onto your plate and begin eating. 

The two of you eat your food in silence, but it’s not uncomfortable. It’s more of you slowly taking in the fact that Minghao is not at all human, while Minghao wonders whether or not he regrets not ordering soda with the food. 

As he takes another bite of chicken, he decides that he does regret it.

Once the two of you finish, you help clean up, placing the cleaned up chicken bones into the box that once held them. Minghao swipes the crumbs off the table and into the plastic bag. You hand him the box holding the bones, and he places it into the bag too. He ties it up, and leaves it by the door, telling you he’ll take it out later. 

Once you settle back down onto the couch, the silence soon becomes awkward. With Minghao staring at you, and you looking at anything but him. He lets out a breath, leaning back into the seat, “Do you know why I’m here?” 

You glance at him, shaking your head. He gives you a look that basically says, now i know you’re fucking lying. While you give him an expression that says, I’m absolutely lying. 

“Why do you blame yourself for Juyeon’s death?” Minghao asks, reaching forward and grabbing the water bottle you offered him. You freeze at the mention of his name, and Minghao takes a sip of water, gauging your reaction. 

“I don’t.” You mumble, looking down at the floor. Minghao shakes his head, “But you do.” 

“I don’t wanna talk about him.” You say, reaching forward and drinking from your water bottle. Minghao purses his lips, resting his chin on the palm of his hand. “If you don’t talk about him now, then when will you?” 

You don’t respond, instead standing up from your couch and walking over to your desk. Minghao spins the chair so that it faces your direction, continuing to stare directly at you as you begin packing up your stuff to head home. 

“Yn-”

“Can you just leave me alone? Please?” You plead, and Minghao lets out a sigh after a moment. He stands up from your chair, brushing off some crumbs on his black jeans with his hands. He runs a hand through his black hair, watching as you zip up your bag.

“Sometimes forgiveness doesn’t just mean forgiving another person.” Minghao begins, and you glance up at him from your bag. “It’s forgiving yourself too.”

You bite the inside of your cheek, looking away from the man. He walks over to your door, picking up the trash bag holding the food the two of you ate. He turns back towards you, giving you a small smile. 

“I’ll always be there when you need me yn, I’m sorry it took me so long to get to you in the first place.” Minghao says, before opening the door and stepping out. You fall into your seat, feeling tears fill your eyes from all the weight on your shoulders. You shake your head, resting it onto the cold surface of your desk as you close your eyes. 

“Why would he use the door when he can teleport.” You mutter quietly as tears fall down onto the carpeted floor, all alone in your office once again.

“Yn, you wanna get lunch with me?” You glance up from your pc, seeing Joshua standing at your door frame with a smile on his face. You look at the time, seeing that your next patient won’t be coming in for about half an hour. Turning back towards Joshua, you see him waiting expectantly for you to come with him. 

but you won’t.

“I’m sorry Joshua, I have to sort out of notes for my next patient.” You tell him, and you almost regret turning him down when you see his smile drop slightly. He gives you a nod, “That’s okay. Next time.” 

You smile, but don’t agree that there will be a next time. Joshua closes the door behind him, and you turn back towards your computer, letting out a sad sigh.

“Why didn’t you go with him?” You’re not shocked at the fact that Minghao is in your office again, considering that this is the fifth time you’ve seen him today. He has made it his mission to randomly appear at your workplace whenever you’re alone for the past week. The two of you have built a relationship of sorts, and you’ve grown rather fond of Minghao, as he feels the same towards you. While he may have made his appearance present whenever you’re at work, he hasn’t made any means of showing up at your apartment yet. 

You glance up at him, finding that he’s wearing an oversized maroon and cream colored cardigan, paired with a white turtleneck and cream colored pants to match. You wonder why he’s so stylish, but you hold back on asking the question as you remember what he just brought up.

“Cause I’m busy.” You mutter, reaching into your drawer to grab a granola bar to chew on. Minghao frowns, placing his hands on your desk and leaning close to your face. You look up into his eyes, and your breath hitches at the close proximity between the two of you. 

“Is it that? Or is it because you’re afraid?” Minghao asks, and the quick flutter of your heart soon disappears due to the question. You frown at him, reaching up and pushing his face away with your pointer finger. 

“No.”

“You need to be a bit more descriptive.” 

“Fuck you.”

“Rude, I’m the virtue of forgiveness you know. I could report you.” You give the black haired beauty a bored look, and he purses his lips. He quietly curses to himself at the fact that you’re now seemingly unaffected by his otherworldly status. 

You try to work again, but let out a sigh when you feel Minghao’s eyes still on you. You glance up at him, seeing that he’s giving you one of his looks that basically he means he’s seeing right through you. You lean back into your seat, taking a bite of the granola bar before beginning. 

“I just. I’m scared.” You mutter quietly, swallowing the chewed up granola. Minghao nods his head, feeling a bit happy that you’re finally beginning to open up. “Why?” 

You think back on Juyeon for a moment, remembering how beautiful your friendship was. You glance back down at your pc, letting out a sad smile at what could’ve been. You begin typing away on your computer again, promptly ending the conversation before it got anywhere. Minghao runs a hand through his hair, before reaching out and patting the top of your head softly.

“We’ll talk when you’re ready.” Minghao says, before disappearing from your office once again, leaving you alone.

“YN!” You hear Juyeon scream, and you turn around at the desperation in his voice. You watch him sprint towards you, and you see bright lights flash at you out of the corner of your eye. You glance to your left to see a truck heading straight towards you, and your heart practically stops. 

“Juyeo-” You’re shoved out of the way, landing hard on your side. You hear the loud screech of the tires and the slam of the car, and you stare down at the road with wide eyes. The sound of the crosswalk signal goes off, telling you to walk, walk, walk. The blood drains from your face, and you turn your head to see Juyeon laying on the ground, motionless.

You quickly stand up and stumble over. Your heart practically stops when you make it to him, and you fail to notice the tears falling from your eyes. You fall to your knees, and with shaky hands you reach out and touch his wrist, seeing if there’s a pulse. 

It’s incredibly faint, and you almost let out a breath of relief. You turn your head to see the driver standing in front of his truck in shock, and you hold back from screaming at him. Glancing around, you find people stopping around you, phones held close to their ears as they call emergency services. 

“Yn…” You turn your head immediately, seeing Juyeon giving you a tired smile. Your heart drops at the amount of blood beginning to surround the two of you. You try to rip off some of the fabric from your shirt to try and soak up the blood from his wounds, but Juyeon tiredly rests his hand over yours. 

“I’m sorry.” Juyeon mutters, and you shake your head, tears falling from your eyes as you give him a smile to try and reassure him that you’re okay. 

“No, it’s my fault. I’m sorry, it’ll be okay.” You ramble, sobs slowly building up in your chest as you do. Juyeon tries to raise his hand up towards your face, but he grimaces in pain, and you shake your head at him. “The ambulance will be here soon.” 

Juyeon doesn’t listen, instead attempting to reach up to cup your face again. His hand makes it to your cheek this time, and he slowly wipes away the tears with his thumb. He opens his mouth to say something, and your eyes widen in horror when his arm falls back to his side, eyes closing.

“Juyeon. Juyeon, please. No, no, no.” You try to feel his pulse, and your heart sinks when you don’t feel anything. You get pushed away by a fellow witness, and they begin to perform emergency CPR on Juyeon as you stare at his lifeless body in shock. 

The sound of the crosswalk signal goes off behind you, telling you to walk, walk, walk. The tears fall from your eyes at a rapid pace, and the sob builds up in your chest as more people begin to surround you and Juyeon. You shake your head, trying to reach out and hold him, but get held back by another witness who tries to calm you down. 

“Juyeon! JUYEON!” You scream, voice cracking as you continue to scream his name in agony. 

“Yn!” You ignore the call of your name, screaming loudly as tears fall from your eyes and onto the road. Your throat is hoarse as you sob, continuing to try and reach Juyeon but being held back by the arms of one of the witnesses.

“JUYEON!”

“Yn!!”

“YN!” You gasp awake, sitting up in bed and locking eyes with a worried Minghao. He reaches out and cups your face, attempting to wipe away the tears falling from your eyes as you stare at him in fear. He watches as your lip quivers, taking notice of the tight grip you have on his shirt.

“Leave.” You mumble after a moment of silence, dropping your hands and looking away from him. Minghao raises an eyebrow.

“What?”

“Leave, Minghao.” You repeat, the tears falling silently past your eyes as you stare blankly at your bed. Minghao shakes his head, resting his hand on your wrist. He opens his mouth to tell you that he’s not going to leave, but you snap.

“I said leave! Go!” You shout, looking up into his eyes and hitting his chest with your hands. The saltiness of your tears is all you can taste as you yell. Minghao stares at you with a pained expression, just standing there and letting you punch him. 

“Did you hear me? LEAVE! GO! GET OUT!” You scream, voice cracking as you cry out in pain.

“GO BEFORE YOU DIE TOO! LEAVE!” Minghao glances down at your hands now tightly clutching his shirt, and he lets out a shaky breath. You open your mouth to scream again, but get cut off when Minghao wraps his arms around you, pulling your head into his chest as you begin to sob. He rubs your back to try and calm you down as you wail into his shirt, and he bites his lip at how your sobs are filled with nothing but pain.

“I’ll stay. I’m not going anywhere.” Minghao mumbles, cradling your head softly in his hand as you cry loudly into his chest. He blinks when he realizes his vision is blurry, and he takes notice of the tears falling from his own eyes. Minghao’s crying. Something he’s never done for a human. 

Minghao bites his lip as an attempt to stop from hiccupping or showing any indications that he’s crying, and he rests his cheek on the top of your head. Closing his eyes, he holds you close until your sobs slow down. 

“I’m not going anywhere, yn.” Minghao whispers, and your eyelids flutter shut, the last of your tears falling past your eyes and landing over Minghao’s heart. 

“It was my fault.” You state as you and Minghao stare up at your ceiling, laying on your bed side by side. It’s long after you finally calmed down, and you’re left with swollen eyes and the inability to breathe through your nostrils. Minghao almost left when you calmed down, but you pulled him into bed with you, and now here the two of you are. At three in the morning. Staring at your off-white ceiling. 

Minghao turns his head to glance at you, seeing that you’re finally ready to open up. He rolls over onto his side, resting his head on his arm as you take in a deep breath. He chooses to be quiet now to let you express everything you’ve been suppressing for three years.

“Juyeon is- was. He was my best friend. We've known each other since we were kids.” You begin, letting out a small smile at the memory of a small Juyeon first introducing himself to a tiny you back in kindergarten. “We grew up together. We went to the same school all the way up to university.” 

Minghao watches as a tear escapes your eye, and you quickly raise your hand up to wipe it away. Letting out a wet laugh, the pain strikes your chest again. “They always said I’d fall for him, and I never believed it. Until he told me he met someone for the first time, and I felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest.” 

You suck in a shaky breath, and Minghao reaches his hand out towards yours, to which you gratefully intertwine your fingers with his. You bite the inside of your cheek before continuing. “After things didn’t work out with that person, I ran to his apartment as fast as I could. That’s how the cycle began. After every newfound relationship didn’t work, I’d run to him no matter what I was doing. But he could never see that it was hurting me in the process.” 

Minghao squeezes your hand, and you close your eyes. You take in deep breaths to try and control your breathing so that you can be able to finish. Minghao watches with sad eyes, but he knows that you opening up about what happened is important in the steps on finally letting you forgive yourself. 

“I loved him. He was everything I wanted my forever to be, but I wasn’t his. I knew that from the start, but I still had hope, you know? But it became too much for me. The day Juyeon died, I ran out of his apartment after telling him I couldn’t do it anymore.” More tears fall from your eyes, blurring the sight of your ceiling. Minghao props himself up in bed to get a good look at you. And you shake your head at him, motioning for him to lay back down, to which he slowly does.

“I was so fucking stupid, Minghao. I didn’t look at the road before going onto the crosswalk, so I couldn’t even see the truck coming my way.” Your voice cracks, and you let go of Minghao’s hand to cover your face with your hands. Minghao feels his own heart shatter at how much pain you’ve been harboring to yourself, wanting nothing more than to take it away from you. “Juyeon saved my life. If I would’ve just stayed then he wouldn’t have die-”

“Yn, it’s not your fault.” Minghao interrupts, and you shake your head as more tears spill from your eyes. “It was my fault.” Minghao rests his hand on your wrist, rubbing circles on the bone with his thumb as he shakes his head.

“Sometimes we can’t control our actions when we’re going through a lot emotionally, let alone think properly. You’re not the cause of Juyeon’s death, he saved you on his own accord. He knows you would’ve done the same for him.” Minghao explains softly, and your shoulders shake by how hard you’re crying. Minghao pulls you close to him again, nuzzling your head into his chest as he rubs your back. 

“Juyeon wouldn’t want you to blame yourself either, yn. He would want you to live.” Minghao whispers, and you quietly sob into Minghao’s chest at his words. His hand trails up and cradles your head, resting his cheek on the top of it. 

“I don’t know what to do anymore.” You say, and Minghao bites the inside of his cheek. He rubs your back, quietly muttering that it’ll be okay. 

“We can’t change the past, but we can take charge of our future. You just have to forgive yourself for any change to happen.” Minghao responds in a soft voice, and you let out a shaky breath, closing your eyes. 

“I miss him so much.” You mumble tiredly, the sobbing having taken a lot of energy out of you. His breath hitches when your arm wraps around his middle, having not expected you to hold him. He rubs your back slowly, trying to regulate his heartbeat so that you can’t hear it. Through the last tears falling from your eyes you add, “I don’t care if he didn’t love me back, I just wish he was here.” 

“He’s always here.” Minghao mutters after a moment, fatigue taking over as you find it hard to keep your eyes open. However, you fight your exhaustion to hear Minghao’s words.

“So live for him.” Is the last thing you hear before you succumb to sleep. Minghao follows soon after, hand stilling on your back as the stars shine brightly in the sky. 

You type away on your computer, quite a bit of weight lifted off your shoulders since the heart-to-heart you had with Minghao a week ago. Your heart is warm, and you feel a bit airy as you turn to glance out the window of your office, seeing the birds flying high in the blue sky. 

While you may still be fearful of crosswalks and trucks in general, you’ve felt better since you let out all the pain you’ve been feeling. As well as remembering Minghao’s words to you, because deep down, you know that Juyeon wouldn’t want you blaming yourself. So you’ve taken the steps into looking into therapists, even though you’re one yourself. Minghao’s helping as well, knowing that this will be good for you in the long run. 

There are still moments where you feel the weight back on your shoulders, and you want to hide from the world. However, it’s understandable. You can’t forget the trauma and internal self-conflict you’ve dealt with for years based on one heart-to-heart talk. It’s helped push you into taking the proper steps to fully heal though.

Hearing a knock on your door, you glance up to see Joshua poking his head in with a big smile on his face. You find yourself smiling back, as both his laughter and the sight of his smile are contagious to you. 

“Hi Joshua.” You greet, and he steps into your office, two bobas in hand, causing you to clap your hands excitedly. He places it before you, sitting down in the seat in front of your desk. You smile, glancing up into his eyes. “You spoil me.” 

“It was a two for one deal, couldn’t resist getting one for you. It was basically a sign from the heavens telling me to get you boba.” Joshua jokes, and you roll your eyes, shoving your straw through the plastic seal after shaking up the drink. You take a sip, letting out a content sigh at the sweet taste of milk tea. 

“How was your last patient?” You ask, and Joshua grins. “He’s opening up a bit more each time, it makes me feel happy to know that he’s slowly trusting me.” 

You nod your head with a smile, understanding the feeling. The two of you converse for a moment, occasionally taking a sip of boba mid-speech as the drink just seems to be too addictive. You glance down at your keyboard when Joshua clears his throat, causing you to look up at him. 

“So you know how I said I’d treat you to pork belly once that new place opens?” You nod your head, taking another sip of boba and chewing on the tapioca pearls. Joshua lets out a shy smile, running a hand through his peach hair. 

“Well, it opened, and I was wondering if you wanted to go next Friday?” You pause for a moment. Something in Joshua’s invitation seems different this time around, from the slight blush rising to his cheeks, as well as the nervous smile he has on right now. Your heart pounds against your chest when you realize, and you bite the inside of your cheek.

After a second you nod your head, and Joshua visibly relaxes. “Yes, I’d love to go with you.” 

“Nice! I’ll text you the details, okay?” Joshua says as he stands up from his seat, and you glance at your watch, seeing that his next patient will be coming soon. You give him a thumbs up, and he lets out a breath, sending you another smile. 

“It’s a date!” Joshua calls, and you nod your head, giggling when he shoots you finger guns before closing the door behind him. You let out a sigh, glancing down at your keyboard when you feel a presence right in front of your computer. 

You look up to find Minghao leaning against your desk, a peaceful look on his face as he stares down at you. His hair is straight this time around, still parted down the middle. He’s wearing a burberry plaid shirt with ripped black jeans, showing off a bit of his thighs. 

“Hi.” 

“Hey.” 

The two of you stare at each other in silence for a moment. Minghao takes in the slight glow to your aura, showing that you’re healing. While you stare into his eyes that hold so much depth to them, but you never know what he’s truly thinking. 

“Going on a date, huh?” Minghao teases, and you glare at the virtue. He chuckles at the furrow to your brow, reaching over and smoothing it out with the pad of his thumb. Your heart leaps in your chest at the contact, but you stay unimpressed until he places his hand back on the table. 

“It’s not a date.”

“You sure?” 

“... no.” 

Minghao giggles at your response, causing you to softly laugh as well. He rolls his eyes, standing up from your desk and raising his arms above his head. You lean back into your seat, taking a long sip of boba as you wait for him to speak. 

“Well, I hope you have fun.” Minghao tells you, and you let out a small smile. Nodding your head, you give him a thumbs up. “I’ll make sure to tell you all the details after it happens. However, I have to pee so I’ll be right back.” 

Minghao watches with a fond smile as you get up from your leather seat and scurry out of your office. It slowly drops from his face once the door closes, and he bites the inside of his cheek. He lets out a sad laugh, resting a hand over his heart, clutching the fabric of his shirt with a tight fist. 

“I’m so happy, but why am I so sad too?” Minghao mutters to himself after a moment, only to quickly switch back to his happy persona once he hears your door open again. You give him a smile, walking to your desk and sitting back down in your seat.

“Wanna play among us?” You ask, and Minghao smirks. He sits down into the seat in front of your desk, wiggling his pretty fingers towards you. “I hope you know that I’ll win, sweetheart.” 

You begin cursing at the man, and Minghao just laughs at your reaction. He lets you ramble, promptly ignoring the dull pain in his heart as he chooses to instead watch the way your eyes sparkle at him. 

Minghao finds you beautiful when you’re happy.

and that’s all that matters.

“I’ll see you next week Doc.” You nod your head with a smile, glancing down at your notes, only to pause when you realize your door hasn’t shut yet. You look up to see Jacob staring at the dinosaur painting Juyeon created years ago. 

“Is there something else you wanted to speak about, Jacob?” You ask, effectively startling the boy out of his thoughts. He turns and gives you a smile, shaking his head. 

“It’s just that I noticed the flower. I don’t see it painted that much.” Jacob answers, and you raise an eyebrow. You walk over and stand beside your patient, staring at the familiar pink flower that Juyeon refused to tell you the name of. “Oh yeah? My best friend never told me the name of it for whatever reason. Guess he just wanted to be more knowledgeable than me.” 

Jacob chuckles, turning to glance at you. You look back at him, and he gives you a knowing smile, causing you to raise an eyebrow. “What?”

He points at the flower dinosaur Juyeon is holding towards dinosaur you, “That’s an arbutus flower.” 

You purse your lips at the unfamiliar name, turning and glancing back towards the painting. You tilt your head to the side, wondering where Juyeon learned of such a flower. Jacob giggles, resting his hand on the doorknob of your door to open it, before turning back to you. 

“It means that you’re the only one he loves. It’s basically a promise that the love he has for you is not only warm, but will last a lifetime.” Jacob says, before stepping out of your office, the door closing behind him. You stare at the painting in pure shock, your heart already dropped into your stomach as you stare at the pink flower dinosaur Juyeon is holding out to you. 

“He. He loved me?” You mutter to yourself, resting your hand over your heart as you stare at the painting. The tears fall from your eyes before you know it, and you slowly fall to your knees, laughing quietly at the ridiculous way Juyeon confessed his love for you. 

Minghao appears beside you in an instant, and you immediately turn to him, resting your head in his chest as he wraps his arms around you. After a moment of the two of you staying like this as you silently cry, you mutter, “He loved me, Minghao.” 

Minghao nods his head, running a hand through your hair he softly whispers, “I don’t see how anyone couldn’t fall in love with you, yn.” 

You close your eyes, wrapping your arms around his middle as you quietly cry into his chest. Minghao rubs your back, letting out a soft smile when he recognizes this as being the last stage of closure you needed. He hopes in another life that you and Juyeon ended up together, but he’s grateful that he was given the opportunity to see you forgive yourself and open up to someone you liked again.

“I can’t believe he’d confess through painting us as dinosaurs.” You mutter, letting out a laugh and Minghao chuckles in response. 

“I expect nothing less from him though.” You whisper, closing your eyes with a soft smile gracing your features. Minghao glances down at you, and he grins, “Has he done something like this before?” 

“Are you kidding me? Of course he has.”

Minghao watches as you slowly light up, explaining the different things Juyeon has done, as well as the weird quirks he had. A stark contrast to the pain and sadness that would be etched across your features when anyone would so much as mention his name. Minghao lets out a soft smile, feeling his heart warm knowing that his mission is done. 

“You ready for your date?” Minghao asks, and you let out a nervous breath at the thought of Joshua about to pop up in front of your apartment building any second now. Minghao’s waiting with you outside of your building as you wait for Joshua, considering the fact that you didn’t want to wait alone. 

A small squabble ensued where Minghao was like what if he sees me doofus?! To which you replied, just disappear before he can tinkerbell!

“I think I’m gonna shit myself.” 

“Well, don’t do that.” Minghao states, and you shoot him a glare. He rolls his eyes at you, reaching out and patting your head. “It was a joke.” 

“I know what jokes are.” You bite back, and Minghao purses his lips at your reaction. He lets out a sigh, wrapping his arm over your shoulders. You glance up at him and see him staring down at you with a small smile on his face. Raising an eyebrow you ask, “What?”

Minghao just shakes his head, and you watch in a slight state of awe when you take notice of the fact that he holds the whole galaxy in his gaze as he stares down at you. “I’m proud of you.” 

You purse your lips at his sweetness, feeling a blush rise to your cheeks as you push him away. Minghao lets out a giggle at your reaction, finding it rather endearing. He turns his head to see if he can spot the head of peach hair, and his eyes widen when he does. 

“It’s time for me to disappear. Have fun on your date, okay?” You tilt your head to the side when Minghao shuffles from one foot to another as he debates on something. You open your mouth to ask what, only for Minghao to lean down and press a soft kiss to your forehead, before disappearing. 

You raise a hand to your forehead, feeling warmth flood through you at the sweet action. You silently curse Minghao for being such a sweetheart, knowing that as the virtue of forgiveness, he should be rather nice. 

“Yn!” You turn your head to see Joshua smiling at you, and you wave your hand at him, quickly walking over so that the two of you can meet in the middle. “Ready for pork belly? I heard their meat is really good quality.” 

You smile, nodding your head excitedly. “Of course I am! What kind of whack ass question-”

“Are you trying to fight me? On our first date?” Joshua teases, and you roll your eyes, nudging him with your shoulder as you try to hide the blush rising to your cheeks. The two of you begin walking in the direction of the kbbq restaurant, playful banter between you both as you do. 

At some point Joshua intertwines his fingers with yours, and the two of you can’t hide each other’s blushes from each other, but promptly choose to ignore them as you continue to converse. You feel your heartbeat a bit faster when you realize you have to cross the street, and Joshua pauses. He glances down at you, “We can go the other way?” 

You stare at the crosswalk for a moment, before shaking your head at Joshua. You turn your head and look up at him with a bright smile, “No, I’ll be okay.” 

Joshua mentions that if you change your mind the two of you can just go the other way a few more times until you make it to the edge of the sidewalk. You reassure him that it’s okay, even reaching out to press the button which signals that you want to cross the street. You squeeze Joshua’s hand, biting the inside of your cheek as you stare at the white lines on the crosswalk. 

You watch as the crosswalk signal turns green, hearing it say, walk. Glancing back down at the white lines, you suck in a deep breath, before taking your first step. You hold Joshua’s hand tightly as the two of you cross the street, and he gives you reassuring words until you make it all the way across. 

You look up at the peach-haired man with a happy smile, and he smiles back down at you, eyes full of endearment as he does so. You’re about to open up your mouth to make a joke, only to pause when you smell the lingering scent of grilled meat coming from your right. You and Joshua turn your heads to see the new kbbq place, and let out excited grins. 

“To the grilling of meats!” You shout, and Joshua laughs at your antics. 

All while Minghao watches from the other side of the street, a proud smile gracing his features at the happiness radiating off of you. He lets out a breath, before turning around and walking the other way, hands shoved into his pockets. 

mission: help yn forgive herself and open her heart again [COMPLETED]

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[kyuiuiuiu]

The Second Sun

Chapter list:

Chapter 1 - The Distrust.

Chapter 2 - The Reflection.

Chapter 3 - The Fear.

Chapter 4 - The Lie.

Chapter 5 - The sun?

Chapter 6 - The Truth.

Chapter 7 - The Guilt.

Chapter 8 - The Second Sun.

Meanwhile, Saeran ran to the nearest bus stop. He had never taken one on his own. He didn’t know how it worked, but he tried anyway. He remembered something else that Yoosung had told him about his address or where he lived, and explained that to the driver. He, with some fear, agreed to take him.

His heart beat fast all the way.

Once he got off the bus he began to analyze his environment, looking for something that resembled what at some point Yoosung mentioned to him.

Where could that place be?

Saeran approached the few passers-by who were on the street to ask for directions, but they walked away, giving him a look of repulsion, as if he were a strange creature. He was already giving up when he heard someone calling him behind his back.

“Where do you want to go, boy?”

It was an old woman’s voice. Saeran turned to look and noticed she was blind. That explained why she came to help him. He cleared his throat and tried to stay calm.

“Ah... I'm looking for a park, a small one. It's supposed to be near building 306, or something like that, but I can’t find it...”

She seemed to understand immediately.

“You must follow the street that is in front of the building and then turn left. It is a small park, but has several trees. You'll find it right away.”

His eyes brightened as he realized he was not that far away.

“... Thank you very much” he said in a friendly tone.

“You're welcome. Be happy...”

Saeran began to walk, and then something prompted him to turn to see the old woman. It was probably the last thing she said, so he felt it right to thank her once again... but she was gone. He didn’t want to think about it too much and continued along the path she had pointed. Finally, in the distance, he saw a park full of trees, just as the old woman had described it. He paused to catch his breath and think of what to say when he saw Yoosung, and then it began to rain. He pulled on his coat’s hood and ran to the park, until he was under the trees. The large size they had was perfect to block the rain.

His gaze went from here to there looking for Yoosung, but he didn’t see him anywhere. Maybe he was gone because of the cold and the rain, or maybe…

“Was I wrong?” He murmured.

He began to get discouraged, although at that point a further disappointment was not a great thing. He was about to leave despite the rain, after all, there was nothing of interest for him in that park.

“Are you from the neighborhood? No one ever comes to this park, they say the area is dangerous at night.”

That voice. That blessed voice.

Saeran contained his emotions and focused on figuring out where the voice that he had longed so much lately had come from but he couldn’t find its location. He felt lucky to wear that hood, because Yoosung couldn’t recognize him because of it. He had no other explanation for Yoosung to speak so naturally.

“No... I'm a little lost” he replied, trying to change his tone so it wouldn’t be so obvious.

“Oh, I understand. You can wait for the rain to pass and then continue along that street near the playground, you would reach the avenue.”

“… Thank you.”

It was so strange to hear his voice again after all that happened, but at the same time, that sense of peace had returned just by hearing him speak for a few seconds. Although this time it was different, he felt too anxious. He wanted to see him.

A loud sound behind him took Saeran by surprise. Apparently, Yoosung was on the tree. It made sense, and as soon as he heard his footsteps approaching to his side he lowered his head and looked to the opposite side.

“The lower branches were getting wet, hehe. I like to climb that tree because nobody can see me…”He confessed with laughter. This was the drop that overflowed the glass. Saeran couldn’t stand it any longer...

“Yoosung.”

And he couldn’t stand it. He turned to look at him and took off his hood.

Yoosung's expression changed to one that showed some pain mixed with his obvious surprise. He turned his gaze to the floor.

“I never expected to see you here... How did you find me? Did your brother track my call or put me a GPS without me noticing?” He joked reluctantly.

“You told me months ago.”

Yoosung looked up, perplexed. He didn’t expect Saeran to remember something so trivial and that even he couldn’t remember saying. It made him feel a bit special. He always knew that Saeran was listening to him, but he never imagined it to be on that level. He felt happy... but he was still hurt.

“I… I must go.”

“But it's raining” he said quickly.

“It doesn’t matter…”

He was deeply hurt by the fact that Yoosung avoided looking directly into his eyes, but he fought the pain and took a deep breath. There was something he had to tell him.

“…Don’t leave the R.F.A”

Yoosung was about to walk away, but that made him stop. He looked into Saeran's eyes —after a long time— and realized that the same intense gaze that frightened him a little, was now charged with a completely different feeling. He could see the pain, and his eyes were red and swollen. He knew why, had seen it in himself countless times.

“Saeran, are you ok?” He asked worriedly and trubled. Saying his name out loud made him feel strange in his chest.

“Don’t leave what you love because of me, please...”

Not even all he had cried during those days was enough, because just as he finished asking Yoosung not to leave the organization the tears began to burst out. Everything he had tried to contain was released at that moment, revealing his fragile side. That side that he didn’t want to show to anyone ever again in his life.

Yoosung was stunned, because he never thought he would see Saeran cry, much less in that situation.

“Since I was born I was tagged as bad —he began to say—. I understand if you want to hate me, I will not judge you for it. I'm the only one you should hate in this story... I can disappear from your life! I will leave you alone. I… I will do as if we had never spoken, I really can do it if you wish, but please… Don’t leave…”

Saeran couldn’t keep talking. His chest began to ache and he burst into tears, just as he had done in the shower a couple of hours ago. He lowered his head, he was deeply confused. Saeran wasn’t sure why he was doing it, he was just certain that he didn’t want to hurt Yoosung. He didn’t want anyone to hurt him... And if he had to take all the blame for it, he was willing to put up with it.

“Saeran…”

Yoosung approached, hesitating, and when he was close enough, Saeran grabbed him roughly and hugged him tightly, still crying. He buried his face in Yoosung's neck, hugging him harder and harder despite the pain in his right arm. He couldn’t think of the pain, he couldn’t stop. He never imagined that he would like so much to make physical contact with another person, at least not after all he had lived. He never thought that the day he needed so much of someone else would come.

Saeran didn’t want to let him go, not again.

“Saeran… —whispered Yoosung— It’s okay” He said, trying to calm him down at he returned the hug.

Yoosung could feel Saeran's shacking breath on his neck, accompanied by tears which began to soak his clothes. A light blush covered his cheeks and his heart began to beat nervously. He had hugged many people in his life for different reasons, but he had never experienced anything like that. For his part, and despite the cold, Saeran could feel directly how warm Yoosung was for the first time. And although he didn’t feel worthy of that moment, he couldn’t stop hugging him and sobbing.

“I can feel the warmth of the sun…”

Saeran didn’t know if he was delirious or something, but for the first time in days, in months, he felt true peace. It was so that his body, noticing that his mind finally calmed down, collapsed by the lack of sleep and food.

“S-Saeran?! —Exclaimed Yoosung, feeling the weight in his arms. Saeran had fainted— Damn! My phone, where I left it... Turn it on, turn it on, turn it on...”

He took Saeran to a bench that was still dry, under a tree. He couldn’t help seeing his face in complete peace as he slept.

He wondered how much Saeran have been through to reach the point of collapsing at a moment like this.

Did the distance between them affect Saeran so much?

The more he thought about it, the more he understood him, because during those days when he decided to get away from the lies of the R.F.A he couldn’t stop thinking about what Saeran would be doing in his absence. Whether he would be fine, or whether he would continue to observe the sky as every day...

Yoosung couldn’t explain it to himself clearly, but if there was something clear it was that during that period he had missed him as never before.

“Don’t get distracted, just call Seven” he reminded himself in thoughts.

____

Hours later, Saeran awoke in his room. He got a little scared and tried to sit down all too sudden, which made him dizzy. Yoosung was sitting by the desk, but after seeing him react that way he hurried to sit next to him to calm him down.

The moment their eyes met his expression changed completely. It wasn’t a dream, Yoosung really was there with him once more. He felt pathetic, since he let him see his weaker side.

A half-awkward silence took over the room, but it was Yoosung who decided to break it —as usual—.

“While you were unconscious Seven came to talk to me, and you're right. I shouldn’t leave the things I love... So I will not leave the R.F.A.”

“… I’m glad to hear that” he replied, trying to hide his happiness.

Yoosung gave a light chuckle.

“I don’t hate you, either. Truth is I can’t hate you, hehe…”

A small spark flared in Saeran's eyes, but he preferred to look away.

“Are you sure of what you're saying? I'm not a good person…”

“I will judge that” replied the blonde, laughing, to which Saeran let out a sigh.

“I don’t deserve it —he paused—. I... I must tell you something important.”

Yoosung opened his eyes in surprise, but remained silent, waiting for Saeran to continue.

“For me... you are like the sun” he said with some sadness.

“The sun?” He asked confused.

Saeran nodded, and took some air to continue explaining.

“The sun is radiant and warm despite everything. It guides your way through the day, and gives his light to the moon to guide you through the night. Yoosung... for me you are like this; Radiant, warm. During all these months you have only enlightened my way, as if you were the sun. But, I don’t deserve that light. I’ll probably never deserve it...”

His expression became even sadder after confessing this, and Yoosung noticed it immediately. It was only a matter of seconds before his body moved on its own and caught Saeran in his arms.

“Stop saying you don’t deserve it, because we all deserve new opportunities. If you think that I am like the sun for you, then let me guide you from now on and together we will make you stop believing that you are a bad person. I'm sure soon everyone will see how fantastic you are, too. Because you’re amazing, you are special, Saeran.”

“Yoosung…” he murmured, as he left the hug. He felt strange, but in a good way. He looked at Yoosung in the eyes and he gave him a smile, which he replied shyly.

It was after this that he finally managed to identify that feeling. Something different from the love he felt for his brother, watching the sky or having some ice cream. Something completely different from a simple friendship. Now that he had finally found the words to express himself, he didn’t know how to say them. There were so many emotions together that Saeran felt they could overflow at any moment.

He knew that if he said the typical words would create an uncomfortable environment, so he preferred to say it in a more... particular way.

“I always looked to the sky for peace, but what makes the sky so clear is the sun. Without the sun, we are nothing…”

“It’s true —he added—. Its light is the same for everyone.”

“I love the sunlight —He said nervously—. I... I want you to be my second sun, Yoosung.”

“His second sun?” Thought Yoosung, ashamed.

He felt the blood rise to her head, making his cheeks crimson red. Yes, it was only moments ago that he offered himself to be like the sun, but the way Saeran told him... He felt a second intention. Actually, it sounded like a declaration of love.

He started laughing nervously, while Saeran looked at him carefully for an answer. He took a little breath, cleared his throat and looked into his eyes somewhat embarrassed.

“I… I want to be your second sun, Saeran.”

At that moment he didn’t know if he was dead or dreaming, since he was sure to be seeing an angel. Saeran smiled at him as he had never seen before, and as he came up to give him another hug, he noticed something very particular.

It was just them two, there, in that special moment that would remain forever in their memories.

They were not predestined, and it was probably for this very reason that they would never find each other on their next life. Nonetheless, in that instant as they hugged each other, something so minimal for everything they both wanted to prove, that… Only with that, they felt complete.

Like the moon and the sun…

_______________

I preferred to leave the notes at the end, so that you could read these two chapters quietly without me interfering. I want to thank you for taking the time to read this story. I wrote it with a lot of love towards them, so I hope it has been reflected, even a little... This story was born of a dream I had long ago (yes, the crazy Kyu dreams of Yooran). I did not want to forget it, so I wrote it to enjoy it whenever I wanted. I hope you liked them as much as I did. Many thanks to the organizers of @yooranweek, I felt in heaven. ♡ And wait a little longer, because I will make all the fanarts that were left pending by my unfortunate computer that dies in the less opportune moment... Anyway... THANK YOU VERY MUCH TO ALL. ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡