#nyx.answers

[nyxtickled]

I can tell you don’t have the fetish because your attempt at text posts are written from a very vanilla perspective

i can tell i have the fetish bc tickling makes me horny

[nyxtickled]

did u pocket all the money ppl gave u for nest then dip ??

yes, that is one way to look at it. (tw: pet loss, grief)

in march i held my pup in my arms and kissed her head over and over as she struggled to breathe until the doctor ended her suffering for us after only 3 months of fighting her sudden diagnosis of lymphoma. she would have turned 4 less than a month later.

that dog was my ESA, my baby, my world. i did everything with her and raised her from 8 weeks old. i knew her from the day she was born. losing her so suddenly and after fighting so hard with weekly appointments and a slew of medications just.. broke something in my brain. i am still not the same. i don’t know when i will feel like myself again. i am just going through the motions and letting the grief do what it wants with me.

and then there was NEST. it has been on my mind a lot actually. yes, i accepted donations to help me fund my ticket and flight. however, most of the fundraising i did was in the form of custom content. i bought my ticket. i even bought my wife’s ticket. and then we lost Fawkes. since then, everything has been dark.

anyway, i don’t say any of this to create excuses. i am glad you mentioned it, because even in the days leading up to the event i grappled with the prospect of going and talked to my wife about it over and over. i would sit there and get ready to write something on discord, or open the tumblr app, and then just freeze. i couldn’t even click on the notification bubbles and eventually just turned all of my notifications off for all of my apps. i couldn’t even log in.

if you have ever been to a gathering, you likely know how incredibly intoxicating the energy is. it’s like going on a bender, but the drug is kink. it’s a complete and total flood of dopamine from start to finish. it’s beautiful, it’s life-changing, it’s empowering, it’s freeing. and it also has the potential to hit like a bomb when you get back home.

i knew that even if i tried my hardest to go and enjoy myself, i was running the risk of catapulting myself into even more of a black hole than i was already in when i returned. my engineering classes started up again in april, and it has been consistently taking all of my resolve just to keep up with homework and studying. not to mention i was still crying about once a day at this point, sometimes more. so, there was also a pretty hefty chance that i would get there and wind up hiding in a room the entire time after realizing i couldn’t tap into the level of joy and sensuality that would have surrounded me.

as a result i made the decision to stay home. and i wanted to share that choice with everyone, i know i should have. but again, i froze and said nothing. lately it has felt as though all the words ive ever known have just left my body entirely. and, again, not an excuse - just an honest explanation.

that being said, i have still thought of the people who helped me with funds outside of purchasing content from me many times. to those reading this: if you donated anything to me with the intent of helping me get to NEST, please contact me directly and i will return it to you. i would never intentionally take advantage of anyone’s generosity. i never reached out to ask for a refund for my tickets or anything, so i lost out too. i just, disappeared. emotionally, mentally, pretty much in every way except physically, i disappeared with Fawkes on that night. every penny i raised has just been used to pay for bills, supplies for our 3 kitties (and 2 tiny kittens we’ve been fostering since our friend saved them from the side of the freeway, long story, cat distribution system is real as fuck) and whatever else we have needed to get by.

to all of my friends who haven’t heard from me, i’m truly so sorry. it won’t be forever, so please don’t worry. exene has been absolutely incredible at caring for me and holding me through it all every day. trust me when i say i look forward the moment i wake up from this as much as you do. i love you with all of my damn heart and i think of you all the time. i’m just.. stuck.

anyways, would it really be a nyx update if it wasn’t 3x longer than it needed to be? 💀 moral of the story: if you donated freely rather than buying content, please let me know if you want your donation back. i will not hesitate to return it to you as soon as i can. i have not done anything with the funds other than live off of them, and barely living at that, lol.

all of my love to u. <3

[nyxtickled]

Do a flip

[nyxtickled]

Hi! There’s a YouTube channel called TickleColector that has a tumblr clip you posted. The one of your cute feet in the stocks being tickled by your girlfriend. I’ve flagged it but I also wanted to let you know

oh my gosh. thank you so so so much for letting me know!

i’m trying to report it myself, but having trouble because it’s not giving me any great options (i basically have to prove i own the copyright in a long process and idk if it’ll even work) so i’m gonna share the link here:

if anyone else wants to help, can yall report this mf?

he made the channel like a week ago and it looks like he’s literally just pirating videos from tumblr. i think i even recognize some other videos from some mutuals on his channel too but i didn’t watch yet, just saw the thumbnails!

tysm for finding this and showing me!!!

[nyxtickled]

I don’t support anarchy relationships and being loyal to someone isn’t “toxic” like you said. It means you value them enough to love them in a way you don’t love anyone else. There’s something special about knowing you are someone’s main love rather than just looking for the next best thing.

I’m queer myself, but this is part of the reason why we get so much hate from other people. Because we just can’t have a normal relationship and stay loyal

alrighty let’s see if i can keep this brief and straightforward!

“i don’t support anarchy relationships” - cool! then don’t have them :)

“being loyal to someone isn’t toxic like you said” - it would benefit you greatly to learn the difference between monogamy and toxic monogamy culture.

“you value them enough to love them in a way you don’t love anyone else” - cool! you can choose to base the value of your relationships on exclusivity if that’s what makes a relationship feel special to you. i can choose to base the value of my relationships on our commitment to each other’s individually fulfilling human experiences.

“there’s something special in knowing you are someone’s main love rather than looking for the next best thing” - sure! being a wife to the love of my life is the most special feeling on earth. and either one of us having romantic/intimate experiences with other people takes nothing away from that. my wife is not my property. she is my partner and my equal and i personally hope she continues to look for EVERY next-best-thing on earth because that’s the amount of love she deserves.

“i’m queer and we get hate because we can’t just have a normal relationship and stay loyal” - okay maybe work through your internalized homophobia and toxic monogamy conditioning? bc you’re the one who thinks the normalcy of a relationship is defined by one’s ability to be exclusive. not everybody has to subscribe to that. but if that’s what you want, then just be monogamous and stop trying to force it on other people simply bc you’ve been conditioned to believe it’s the only way to have a valid marriage/relationship.

[nyxtickled]

Poor exene. She has to deal with an overweight heffer with fugly tattoos 🤢🤢🤢

can i get a poor exene in the chat ✊🏻😔 this is a very trying and difficult time for her. they’re saying they’ve never seen her so devastated </3

[nyxtickled]

Hey. I read your post about socal.

I have nothing more to say other than I'm proud to see you standing strong to that type of behavior and informing the community.

I, admittedly, grinned hard when you mentioned how he'll never have access to you again while on the plane with him. You are radiant, strong, and badass.

Keep being great, and I know everyone with some sense will stand with ya.

thank you so much friend 🥺💖 ya know, your third paragraph makes me realize there’s probably a lot of people who would love to have seen me say what really deserved to be said. so just for closure, below the cut is the last text i ever sent him :)

“you will never have access to me ever again.

and you should really know that i didn’t seek ANYONE out, although it’s useless to tell you that because you will say whatever you please. you did this to yourself. i provided nothing but honesty and receipts when i was approached. i made new friends, and you happened to tell a different story to every single one of them including myself. you’re pathological. i don’t know why anyone would do what you do or say what you say. it’s genuinely fucking terrifying.

all i wanted was to have all ties cut with you. finding out that you’ve compulsively created scenarios about all the women you were involved with, and for NO reason at all, while dragging each one along for a different motive and keeping each one under a different impression of how the other one felt? absolute fucking insanity.

you need to stop while you still can honestly. because everyone fucking knows that you’ve bullshitted every single one of us. T and Adi know that i have never once been jealous, vengeful, malicious, or insecure whatsoever about them. i now know that T was never trying to session with you due to being “jealous” over our tumblr videos. i also now know that it was you who pursued her for sessions time and time again. absolutely shameful that you’d describe her the way you did when she WAS always so sweet. you had me thinking she was some jealous competitive lee and she never once even cared what the fuck we were posting. oh, and Adi didn’t either, surprise surprise!

the mysterious event you supposedly played hooky from with T, to session with me at the casino? the reason why you asked me not to post content saying we played the previous night? insane behavior. there was never any fucking event. that’s LUNACY. oh, and you think i’m enjoying my “revenge tour,” yeah? just like you said about [lee 1]? just like you said about [lee 2]? what a magnificent phenomenon that everyone who ever finds you out for the narrative-twisting fantasy fiction author that you are is actually just being *vengeful* and trying to *ruin what means most to you.* you don’t see the common denominator here? you think WE wouldn’t see it?! are you really that vapid? you couldn’t be. i really didn’t think so.

aaaand yet, here you are. reading text messages from me out loud to Adi while you try to control the narrative there too, but leaving out the part where i wrote what you didn’t want to admit to. telling me whatever you thought i’d want to hear to keep me around for fucking tumblr views and fake vetting purposes, knowing damn well you don’t possess a FRACTION of the emotional responsibility that is actually required in a D/s dynamic with a “primary lee” that you offered me. a dynamic i didn’t even ask for by the fucking way. smoke and fuckin mirrors and too coward to just admit that you’re simply not interested. or is it because you actually just don’t have what it takes and that’s what you’re too afraid to admit?

this shit is fucking sociopathy and that barely scratches the surface. you will NEVER have access to me again and i don’t give a fuck what you say to anyone about me because i have nothing to hide. the truth is very easy to remember. i never have to defend myself to anyone. you know why? because i don’t lie, manipulate or coalesce for the sake of nothing more than my embarrassingly fragile ego. you fucked this up, not me.”

[nyxtickled]

Do you have no shame in posting your self doing such sinful things?

none whatsoever!

[nyxtickled]

What is your most wicked tickling fantasy?

i’d have to say my most fucked up and wicked tickling fantasy is prolly like, i’m pinned down or tied down a lil bit, and a ler is like, slowly softly tickling me with utter care and respect and adoration while spending ages exploiting every single detail they remember abt me and what makes me the most bashful or the most ticklish and keeping me in this limbo of never quite tickling me to the point of tapping out but instead just drawing out this endless stream of soft giggles from the agonizingly gentle torment that i’m so ridiculously embarrassed about until i’m so fuzz brained that i can’t even be bothered to put up a fight anymore bc they’ve completely hijacked my psyche

[nyxtickled]

Everyone is so secretive of their tickle fetish I wonder how many of us there really are

honestly, this app has shown me that the numbers are far greater than i would have EVER imagined in a bazillion years

[nyxtickled]

I hope you have enjoyed the absolute fuck out of your latest tickle travels. We don't have an event like AUNT or NEST in Aus, so I'm going to have to live vicariously through you.

When do we get to see you and Cece wrecked together?

Maybe she should come visit Case del Nyxene

IT WAS FUCKING INSANE IN THE BEST WAY IMAGINABLE 😭😭😭

while @yourlittlettoy and i were wrecked terribly, many times over the weekend, we did not happen to fall victim to any dual-lee trappings (mostly because i would find her getting demolished, help with her demise, and then immediately get thrown into her place when they let her up 😵‍💫😂🫠)

however, NEST may indeed be in the works for me.. which, i fear, could result in some double damage for us 😭

aaaaand i may have already spoken to cece about how necessary it is for her to come visit Case del Nyxene at her earliest convenience so she can find out how evil my lovely wife and i are when we work together as well 🤭 but definitely not so they can try their hands together on me too. nope, only cece will be wrecked, that is for sure!!! 😵‍💫🫠💀

[nyxtickled]

I kinda agree with that anon, and I’m a little confused about the marriage? If you guys are open to seeing other people as well that’s totally okay. But marriage seems like a commitment to loving that person. I understand being open to others, and we can’t marry multiple people. So is this your main partner and you guys have people on the side? Sorry if I am not understanding correctly 💚

hi there, i appreciate your approach from a place of curiosity/lack of understanding! i’m happy to explain my POV and that being said i do not expect everyone to agree with me. i’ll preface this by saying these are simply my own personal views on marriage/relationships and they are not “right” or better than anyone else’s. it’s just what works for us!

your statement “marriage seems like a commitment to loving that person” still rings completely true for us! we want to build a life together for the rest of time. we love each other. we care for each other. we’re committed to one another.

the best way for me to describe it is simply that we personally don’t believe that the only way to validate our love and commitment to one another is to restrict our love/intimacy/attraction to only each other.

we both feel that human connection is the most meaningful thing to take from this life. i never want my love for my wife to put her in any kind of box. i don’t want my wife to love me so much that she chooses to never pursue connections with anyone else—i want her to love me so much that she can pursue any connection she wants in this life and still choose to continue loving me, depending on me to be her safe space, her home base, her wife, her person.

i don’t want to be committed to my relationship, i want to be committed to my wife. i want to be committed to my wife’s happiness, joy, and human experience. i don’t need or want to be her only source of those things. if she meets someone and feels a connection to them, i want her to enjoy that. if she feels an attraction to someone, i want her to enjoy that. if someone else wants to love her, i want her to receive that. because it doesn’t mean she loves me any less.

to us, the human capacity for love is not a limited resource. any amount of love we give/receive outside of the love we share with each other has no impact on ours. like, if our love was a river, imagine it coming from an ocean. and if we have other Love Rivers in our lives, they don’t branch off from our personal Love River, they come from the Love Ocean and they each have their own Love River. that’s basically what relationship anarchy is to us.

hope that makes some kind of sense but again, nobody else has to agree. it works for us, it makes us happy, so that’s what we practice. it’s not a requirement for anyone else!

[nyxtickled]

Can we also see how pretty your belly button is 🤧

i’ll be so fr i have no idea what makes a pretty belly button. here’s mine tho + my piercing scar that closed up yeaaars ago!

[nyxtickled]

Now that you’re married are you still gonna be letting other people tickle you naked? Unless you have an open relationship I feel like this is so messed up and disrespectful to your partner 🤢

yikes - i take it you have not paid attention to a single thing i’ve shared on practicing relationship anarchy or my stance on toxic monogamy culture? :-)

[nyxtickled]

Thank you for writing the callout post. I tried to warn you so that you wouldn’t have to go through the same thing as me, but he convinced you I was crazy. I’m glad you, Adi and T are friends and supporting one another through this — J

oh my god, i am so so so happy you stopped by. i have actually been trying to find you on fet because i wanted to reach out and apologize. thank you so much for your support, and im so sorry that you experienced similar mistreatment. if you ever want to talk, debrief, or if you’re open to me sincerely apologizing for allowing him to control the narrative & dismissing your claims, my door is wide open 💖

[nyxtickled]

the intimidating nyx, scared by a little fork? no that would be ridiculous! of course, i expect you to remain cool and collected even in the face of absolute ticklish torment!

even as those unyielding metallic prongs rake and tease the most ticklish parts of your feet. no, you can surely handle it, right?

now let me just take a little trip to my kitchen… 😈

hm? what’s that you were saying? you mean these?