#old men sniffing glue

[supernovamateeee]

😂😂

[jb89149]

The 60s and Drugs

"One Baltimore high school student described the journey. Around 1966 “I started on Thunderbird wine and then sniffing glue.” The next year he moved on to marijuana and pills. In the counterculture economy, narcotics were prestige; they were the markers of cool. “The more serious drug I used, the more status. To me, marijuana was status because it was illegal . . . I was completely on Quaaludes most of eleventh grade.” By 1968 “everyone had moved up a notch . . . The drinkers were into pot and the pot smokers of the previous years were into acid.” This student was now on heroin.

At the same time, young U.S. soldiers were fighting a brutal war in Vietnam. Most smoked marijuana and many started to take heroin. “Fourteen year old girls were selling heroin at roadside stands on the main highway from Saigon to the U.S. army base at Long Binh. Saigon street peddlers stuffed plastic vials of 95% heroin into the pockets of GIs as they strolled through down town Saigon,” claimed one eyewitness. By 1971 half of all enlisted men had tried the drug.

Heroin had, in the words of one historian, left the ghetto and crossed both the “suburban” and the “military firewalls.” Heroin had become a drug for white middle-class kids. One 1974 study claimed that 6 percent of men between twenty and thirty had tried heroin and half of these were hooked. The same historian estimated that as many as 3 in every 1,000 Americans were addicts."

-Benjamin T. Smith

The Dope

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Fully Completely 3

Warnings: non-consent sex and rape (series), violence, mutual irritation, harassment

This is dark!Loki x reader and explicit. 18+ only.  Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Series Synopsis: There’s a new face in Birch and he’s come to haunt your door.

Sister series to Smalltown Bringdown, When the Weight Comes Down, and Little Bones

Note: On to part three. Sorry for being a human disaster.

Thanks to everyone for their patience and feedback. :)

I really hope you enjoy. 💋

<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!

Chapter 3: Or it will move right through me

💀💀💀

Jerome annoyed you as he picked through your tool box and clicked the ratchet noisily. He was excited but impatient and complained that you were taking so long. You told him if he wanted to pay out of pocket for labour, you could finish faster. 

You sat by his bike, parts strewn at your feet, and bent your head to look under the tank. You still had a lot to go and hadn’t yet added anymore of the gross chrome to the frame.

“Do you realise how filthy this is gonna get?” you huffed as you sat up and leaned your elbows on your legs, “not to mention how ridiculous it looks.”

“I like it. It’s just my style,” your brother grinned, “I don’t remember you spending this much time on Bucky’s ride and you and him--”

“He had me replace the tailpipe, you want nothing short of a rebuild,” you scoffed, “and you’re not the boss.”

“Don’t remind me,” he rolled his eyes, “guess it could be worse though. It could be Steve.”

“Thank god it’s not,” you chuckled, “I don’t know how many women had to toss beer in his face before he latched onto that mousy one at the bakery.”

“She’s nice,” Jerome shrugged, “far as I know. She doesn’t talk to anyone but Steve.”

“I wonder why,” you tisked, “he has insecurity written across his forehead.”

The tinny bell rang and the door whooshed open as the wind caught it. Jerome glanced over and dropped the ratchet noisily into the drawer of the tool box. You growled in warning as you spent much of your spare cash on those. He apologised quietly as he squared his shoulders at the man who appeared.

“Hey,” Bucky wiped the flakes from his hair and blew out a shiver.

“Bucky,” Jerome said rigidly.

The other man nodded and stepped further inside the garage. He shoved his hands in his pockets and paced aimlessly around the concrete floor. You watched him as you fiddled with the bolt in your hand.

“You wanna head down to the bar?” It wasn’t a question as Bucky came to face you, “I gotta talk to your sister.”

“Sure,” Jerome replied sharply, “you got it, boss.”

Bucky grumbled and waited for him to leave. He sniffed and kicked his toe into the floor.

“So… what’re you doing here? Been a while so must be urgent,” you sat up on the rolling stool and stretched your back.

“The whole town’s talking about it. You fighting him,” his brows drew together, “I told you I’d take care of him.”

“You didn’t,” you said evenly, “so I did.”

“I talked to him--”

“And said what?” you snorted.

“Look, you don’t understand. You said it yourself, you don’t care about my business. You don’t get what’s going on but what I need from him is bigger than your temper.”

“Excuse me? This is my fault? He broke into my shop, he followed me from that diner and he put his hands on me,” you stood and tossed the bolt away, “what do you want me to do, Buck?”

“First, I want you to remind yourself who I am. We’re not fucking anymore so that mouth isn’t as cute,” he warned, “and I want you to play nice.”

“All you have to do is keep him away from me. How hard is that for a man like you, huh? You’re the big dog.”

“Watch it,” he pointed at you, “I won’t tell you again.”

“He’s here to deal with you, not me,” you insisted, “he grabbed me, I defended myself, and I’ll do it again.”

“This isn’t grade school anymore, you can’t fight the boys,” he sighed.

“What are you saying?”

He was silent as his jaw ticked and his blue eyes strayed to the ceiling. You stepped closer and gripped your hips as you stared him down.

“There’s nothing else I can do for you. Nothing else I will do. He’s your problem.”

He met your glare and you scoffed in disgust, “you’re fucking serious? What do these idiots have on you?”

“It’s not what they have on me, it’s what I want from them. I’m planning for something bigger than Birch, that means there’s gonna be some sacrifices,” he shrugged.

“Sacrifices? Is that what you call it? Well, here’s one for you, the next time you get a little scuff on your tank or your headlight starts to flicker, you can head down to Carl’s,” you scowled.

“Don’t do this,” he gritted through his teeth.

“I can get business without you. I do better work than Carl, you know that. So go, I’ll deal with that asshole on my own, how I see fit.”

He inhaled and lifted his chin. He closed his eyes and thought. 

“Damn it,” he swore, “you can’t make anything fucking easy. What is it with you women and your god damn--” he lifted his hand and stopped himself, “you get in the way of my business, and you won’t be so worried about Loki.”

“Oh yeah? That’s what he said about you,” you mocked, “what’s with you men and your egos?”

His lip curled and he breathed through his teeth. His eyes lit up and he punched his palm as he turned away quickly.

“I hope he has his fun with you. Maybe he can fuck some sense into you,” Bucky growled, “God knows I tried.”

“You weren’t that good,” you snipped.

He kicked the shelf of wipers hung near the front of the shop and grunted. He stormed to the doorway and stopped to look back at you.

“You’ll be wishing it was me…” he hissed.

He waved you off and continued through the front door, slamming it behind him loudly. You stared at the scattered packages of wipers and bit down on your tongue. You wanted to run out and strangle that idiot but you knew how he could be. It was the reason you broke off your little fling; he was too much like you. Hard-headed and volatile.

💀

You weren’t going to change just because the town was overrun by asshole men. You were standing your ground and that meant you were going to finish your club sandwich and enjoy one lunch without interruption. 

The café was busier that day as the snowfall dwindled and the streets were mostly cleared as the plows made their regular rounds. You looked through the window as the school kids stopped by the bakery for hot drinks on their lunch and circled the rim of your mug with your fingertip. You sensed it was only the lull before the storm.

Further down you could see the corner of The Asp and heard a rumbling engine. Your shop remained empty except for Jerome’s bike. Since Bucky’s visit, you were too worked up to concentrate anyway. You wanted to take your wrench and knock every man in town in the head with it.

Nora brought your sandwich as Kimmie didn’t work on the weekends and your side of soup. You would eat both and leave satisfied. You wouldn’t let anyone ruin your day off. Well, not that you had very much to do aside from that.

You dipped your crusts in the tomato soup and stared at the seat across from you. Empty. Perfect.

You scooped the last of the bowl into your mouth and wiped your lips with the napkin. You stood and gulped up your coffee. You left money on the table and headed out. A peaceful, solitary lunch all to yourself.

You skipped the shop and continued down the street. You pushed into the hobby shop you rarely ventured into, more a bookshop if you were honest. You greeted the man at the counter with a smile. When you were a girl, you remembered he ordered you a special set of paints as the ones in his store were all dried up. Lu, you recalled his name.

You went to the shelves of models and looked over the new arrivals. You took the Smokey and the Bandit Trans Am off the shelf and smirked. Your father had one just like it when you were a kid. It wasn’t exactly new. You grabbed a bottle of black paint with it, always running low on the stuff, and headed for the counter.

Lu punched the buttons on his till and you heard a creak. Light footsteps emerged from the basement of used books as you opened your wallet.

“I didn’t take you as bookish,” Loki’s voice made you cringe.

You didn’t answer and counted out the bills for your purchase, “actually, you got any glue? I didn’t see any on the shelf.”

“Hmm, oh,” Lu turned and bent to reach into a box, “haven’t stocked up but these came in just before the storm.”

He added the orange and white tube to your bag and you added another bill. He counted out your change and handed it to you.

“Quite interesting what small towns can hide,” Loki didn’t wait to step up to counter and stood close, his sleeve against yours, “An antique edition of Whitman. One of the only Americans I read.”

You looked down at the worn tome, the edges fraying and the letters faded. It was marked up to a couple hundred. You could appreciate a love for reading but you weren’t entirely sure some old paper was worth all that.

“I’ll need the reading material as my visit has been prolonged,” he mused as you grabbed your bag and headed for the door, “my brother is due to return so I will stay in his place… get to know the town of Birch more intimately.”

You hid your disgust at his words and continued out the door. His exaggerated tones stuck in your head as you passed the window and absently swung your bag. You hated him. You really did. You should have bashed him over the head with that dumb book. 

You thought of that day in the snow and smiled. You knew that shame lingered in him. You would have no problem repeating that scene.

You came up to your shop and stopped short. The burly redhead who arrived with the pestilent man stood at your door, peering in through the window, angling his head as he tried to see around the blinds. You cleared your throat as you neared.

“Something I can help you with?” you asked dully.

“Oh, ah,” he turned and laughed at himself, “I thought… Loki, I thought he’d be here.”

“No. He wouldn’t be,” you said, “he’s down at the book shop.”

“Thanks. He apologise?” He prodded.

“You seem to know him well. You think he did?” you challenged.

“Ah, nah,” he smiled awkwardly, “s’pose he didn’t.”

“S’pose he didn’t,” you echoed, “it would be smart if you kept him away from here.”

“Yeah, uh, should do,” he sidled past you and you listened to his heavy boots clump along the beaten snow.

You took out your key and unlocked the door. You closed it quickly behind you, that man’s presence set you on edge. He hadn’t shown any of the venom of his associate but he was loyal to him. You double checked the locks on all the doors and made certain all windows were closed. 

You went up stairs into your apartment and stripped off your coat and boots. You sat at the small table where you ate those dinners you didn’t forget and unpacked your new model. You sorted the pieces and spread out the instructions. The image of the car on the box brought back nostalgic memories. You wouldn’t know all you did about bikes if it wasn’t for your dad. You missed him every day for the last… too many years.

You lost yourself in the tiny parts. You hunched over the table and carefully dabbed glue onto the plastic. Your eyes began to itch as the windows dimmed and you got up to turn on the lamp. You kept building well after dark and finally left the half-finished car on the table.

You stretched out your limbs as you stripped down to only your loose tee and yawned. You fell into bed and turned on the old tube television. You hit play on the VCR and the loud previews blared from the boxy speakers. You rolled yourself in your comforter and sat through the same movie trailers you’d watched a dozen times.

You were never a romantic but you the movie was another shadow of your childhood. Your grandma used to watch Kathleen Turner whenever you went to her place. She would serve you yogurt and berries and turn on the cheesy action flick and if you slept over, she would put in the sequel right after.

Your rituals kept you sane. You found it was easier to know what to expect and given your temper, it was better not to be surprised. You were always the trouble child and you regretted all those times your dad had to come talk to the principal or walk you home from school. You promised him you would be better.

Still you didn’t regret what you did. He always told you to stand up for yourself. Hell, he taught you how to throw a punch and all your best insults were inherited from him. You smiled as you thought of him and hugged your pillow as the intro played and the credits flicked up one name at a time.

You drifted off in the glow of the television and the sound effects sank into your dreams. You were still in Birch but thick vines had grown around all the buildings and billowing leaves shrouded the skies. The town had turned to jungle and you could hear the growls and grunts of beasts unseen.

You spun as a twig snapped and a snake uncoiled from a branch and fell into the brush at your feet. You stepped back and it slithered towards you. You stumbled and ran away as you could hear its skin smoothly glide through the grass at your feet. You tripped as its long body wrapped around your ankles and you crashed to the ground.

You struggled as the snake constricted your body and wound its neck around to face you. Its green eyes shone as its black scales gleamed. Its tongue flicked against your cheek and you felt its hot breath as it opened its mouth and revealed long, frightening fangs. You screamed as its bite loomed and you woke with a start.

The visions of the wild jungle faded but the heat did not. You blinked as an amber haze took over the room and you fought through your messy blankets and tumbled onto the floor. Your curtains were alight along with much of the wall. You bachelor was blazing with orange flames and you could barely see the door through the smoke.

You coughed and scrambled to your feet. Your eyes streamed and you blindly ran for the door and flew down the stairs. The shop was almost entirely engulfed as you reached the lower landing and you fumbled with the front door as flames licked closer and closer.

You burst out into the frozen night and your feet were numbed by the ice and snow. You retreated from the burning building, your life set aflame, and turned back as you reached the sidewalk. Sirens screamed and made you wince as you crossed your arms and chattered against the cold.

“Pity,” the slither made your skin crawl, “though I suppose it is a blessing you at least saved yourself.”

You glanced at Loki as your vision blurred with the tears of realisation. Everything you had was turning to ash before you. You blinked away the droplet and sneered at him. He smirked and you knew. He smirked and he knew. It wasn’t an accident.

[krakenbait]

olympic update: 2/15

Good morning everyone! It’s “discount chocolate day,” so it’s a good time to satisfy your sweet tooth. And now, to satisfy a craving for Olympics news…

Eileen Gu, the 18 year old American-born free skier who competes for China and has become a sensation in the host country, was back at it in women’s slopestyle last night. Much like her turn on big air, it came down to the last run, but it seems Gu thrives under pressure. Her last run was her best one, and it was enough to earn her a silver medal. Although it’s not the gold she was looking for, it did nothing to dull her enthusiasm, or that of the usually-quiet audience. Matilde Gremaud of Switzerland won gold, and Kelly Sildaru of Estonia won bronze. 

The US finished third in men’s speed skating team pursuit, earning Team USA its second speedskating medal at the Olympics. But the result is a little disappointing, as the Americans hold the world record and were favorites to win this event. - In the women’s team pursuit, Canada set a new Olympic record and took home gold, with Japan getting silver and the Netherlands bronze. 

In figure skating, the women’s singles competition is underway with the short program. Kamila Valiyeva, the embattled Russian teenager, leads after another near-flawless performance. 17 year old Russian Anna Scherbakova is in second and the Japanese skater Kaori Sakamoto is in third. Americans Alysa Liu, Mariah Bell, and Karen Chen are in 8th, 11th, and 13th, respectively. 

Corinne Sutter of Switzerland won gold in the women’s downhill, while Italians Sofia Goggia and Nadia Delago won silver and bronze. Mikaela Shiffrin was in 18th after what was, for her, essentially a practice run for the combined. With one run of downhill and one run of slalom, the combined will be Shiffrin’s last opportunity for an individual medal at these games.

Anna Gasser of Austria won gold in snowboarding women’s big air, beating out slopestyle gold medalist Zoi Sadowski Synott on the last run. Sadowski Synott is going home with a gold and a silver, and Kokomo Murase, a Japanese youngster, won bronze. 

In the men’s big air, Su Yiming of China won gold, earning the host country its first medal in snowboarding big air, which was added to the Olympics in 2018. Mons Roisland of Norway took home the silver, and Max Parrot of Canada finished with bronze. 

Norway won gold in the men’s 4x7.5k biathlon relay. Norwegians are good on skis, etc. 

Norway also went 1-2 in Nordic combined large hill, aka ski jumping off the big tower then doing 10km of cross-country skiing. 

Germany swept the podium in two-man bobsled, with three different pairs taking home medals. After sweeping the luge and skeleton events, I think it’s pretty easy to say the Germans rule sliding sports. 

Two losses for Team USA in curling: the women lost to Switzerland, the men lost to Italy. 

Today’s watch list (times in EST as usual): 

Women’s curling USA vs Canada (8:05 pm)

Freestyle skiing men’s slopestyle (8:30 pm)

Alpine skiing men’s slalom runs 1 & 2 (9:15 pm & 12:45 am)

Men’s hockey quarterfinals USA vs Slovakia (11:10 pm)

Yesterday’s funny photo was of aerials free skier and gold medalist Xu Mengtao collapsing to the snow, though hard to tell if it was a crash or because she was happy she just won gold. Best captions were: 

“I picked the wrong day to stop sniffing glue”

“It’s a new event- the luge-less luge!”

“cocaine kingpin takes the L”

“ight imma head out”

Here’s today’s funny photo.

Medal count below. Have a great day everyone!

tag list: @washyourdamnhands​ @sonnymilano​ @18minutemajor​ @ethan-bears​ @cadopan​ @howsimplemyheart​

[mylifeisactuallyamess]

Managed to write a Drabble this morning. I haven’t written Poe for a long time and it seems he is still 100% my comfort character. Whenever anything happens and I struggle to process he is what helps. Also I haven’t proof read it so just take it as it is 🤣

Life Support

Poe Dameron x Reader

Warnings: feelings of sadness, comfort, Poe is understanding, mention of bad news but no details. Struggling to process.

Word Count: 1160

You know when someone tells you something. It happened years ago and you’d survived all this time without knowing it and yet now you knew you were sad. Were you allowed to be sad about this? It didn’t happen to you, but it still denied you of something you’d wanted all your life. You weren’t even sure how it was brought up, it was just blurted out at you over the phone with a throw away comment afterwards. You sighed rubbing your eyes, still deciding if you were allowed to cry or not. You felt sad, it settled in your heart, a piece you never knew was missing.

The door opened with a twist of his key, his dark eyes looked over you as he paused in the doorway.

“Babe, why are you on the floor?” You tightened your arms around your knees, you could hear the amusement in his voice, but he didn’t know. He frowned at your lack of reaction, dragging his brows down below his curls that draped over his forehead. He quietly shut the door, now he knew something wasn’t right. He hung his bag and coat up before dropping his keys onto the side. You flinched slightly as he settled on the floor next to you, his rich brown eyes took in your blank expression as you stared straight ahead.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked softly.

“I-I’m not sure there’s anything to talk about.” You couldn’t speak above a whisper, your hands gripping tightly to your clothes in an effort to hold you together. His warm hand reached across and brushed the hair from your face, his gentle fingers gripped your chin making you look into his deep eyes.

“You’re sad, I can see it.” Your eyes roamed over his face, drinking him in. If there was anyone you could tell it would be Poe. Poe with his vibrant brown eyes that you could swim in for the rest of your life, Poe with his soft curly hair that always seemed to have a mind of its own but never looked messy. Poe, one of the kindest, most understanding men you’d ever met, he had changed you for the better, made your life so much better. He had pulled you back from the brink more times than you could count and he was still here, loving the mess that was you. He caressed your cheek with his thumb, trailing it over your skin as he patiently waited to see if you’d tell him what was wrong.

“It’s just….” you paused. This was ridiculous right? It happened years ago, you never knew. So why did it feel like someone just punched you in the gut? “I’m not sure if I should feel sad. Why…?” You leaned into his touch, letting his warmth soothe you as he spread his fingers holding your face like it was the most precious thing on the planet.

“I want to understand,” he murmured. His rich voice finally breaking that last barrier you had and a tear leaked out of your eye as you gazed at him. He swiped it away as you took a shuddery breath, you told him. Spilling every word your Mum had said to you explaining why you felt so confused about how to feel. His listened with an intense expression on his face, taking in every word that fell from your mouth, he waited for you to finish before he said anything. Respecting you needed to get this out in the open and not be interrupted. Your eyes fearfully looked into his when you stopped talking thinking this was all ridiculous and stupid and you should really get off the floor and cook dinner. You went to move but his hands stopped you.

“You have every right to feel like this. Just because it happened so long ago doesn’t make it hurt any less. It was a shock, and you have missed out.” You relaxed back against the cupboards, resting your head on the wood.

“I feel like a piece of me is missing? But that’s ludicrous,” you mumbled. He shuffled closer, pulling you to his chest and softly stroking your hair. You zoned out to his heartbeat, constant and steady in his chest, his body heat seeped into you comforting you in ways you didn’t think were possible. A quiet sob erupted from your chest and he tightened his arms around you.

“It’s ok to cry, you should let it out.” It wasn’t that you needed permission to cry but it helped you cross that last hurdle. You didn’t scream or sob loudly, you just let the sadness out, the tears leaked out of your eyes and into his shirt. You sniffed a few times, believing you were overreacting and being daft but Poe still held you close helping you crest this particular wave. You played with the collar of his shirt and he rubbed his chin on your hand, the stubble rough against your fingers. You moved your hand to press against his face, ghosting over his lips as you finally shifted off his chest. Your head lay on his shoulder as you gazed at each other, just soaking in the comfort and closeness you offered one other. His lips pressed against your tear tainted mouth and you accepted the kiss, slowly dragging your fingers through the hair above his ear, tugging him closer.

“I should cook,” you said softly, your eyes still closed as his kiss lingered on your lips.

“No, I’ll cook today.” You felt him move, he stood and pulled you with him leading you to the sofa. He stared pointedly at the seat and you rolled your eyes at his silent order to sit down. As soon as you had he was draping a blanket over you, tucking it around you so you were covered completely and putting your favourite film on the tv. You freed a hand, grabbing his before he went back to the kitchen, he looked down at you raising an eyebrow. You tugged on his hand and he knelt before you. Your hand went to brush through his curls, your eyes studying his features, the strong line of his jaw and how the stubble gave him that perfect 5 O’clock shadow. His hand tucked into your hair as a smile played around his mouth.

“I love you, Poe Dameron.” The smile that broke out over his face lifted your heart and you felt your own smile starting at the corners of your mouth.

“And I love you, more than you know.” He leaned forward, stealing the breath from your body. His lips massaged yours, his tongue pressing against yours in a dance that was as old as time but still held the thrill from the first time. He made you feel better, he was able to piece you back together every single time. Poe Dameron was your glue and you were his.

[billantoinette]

Do you remember you took a thrashing for me?

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Join us this evening on WAVE 3 news at 5pm for the latest on the heat, rain, and storm potential. Mance Rayder wore only a thin tunic that left his limbs naked to the cold. Figure skater Michael Weiss is 40. Insurance companies will be backing her for the rest of her life. Once relaunched, the dragonflies were tracked from the ground and the cazadora vaquera tommy hilfiger air (with a Cessna 152 or 172.) The scientists found that their subjects traveled more often on calm days than windy days, and sat out days of high wind. Oh yeah, for the angry white people in their content comfort zones, the Constitution protects our speech. Micromax is following this rule with its latest campaign for Qube X550, a newly launched touch screen handset with a 3D interface.. That's where he has to learn and our other guys have to pick it up. High school, college or in the NFL. He does not want to hurt me, he told me so, he only does it when I give him cause. 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They say the countess keeps reproaching him with not marrying her, but he keeps putting it off.

[scullysexual]

Charlee’s Solo X-Files Rewatch: 01x03: Tooms

Yeah there’s no board this week because I forgot to make one and I’m almost on my period and can’t move. 

😊 = Yes.

😞  = No.

😡 = It happens/it appears and I’m not happy about it.

❌ = It doesn’t appears/happens and I can’t be sad about it. 

MONSTER OF THE WEEK EPISODE.

Case: Mulder and Scully investigate a series of killings were a one hundred year old man (or koala) can fit through impossibly small spaces.

Monster: Eugene Victor Tooms.

Favourite Quote: Is there any way I can get it off my fingers quickly without betraying my cool exterior?

Would I recommend It: Yes! It’s great. If you wanted people to get on board with the MoW episodes this was a great way to go.

My Initial Thoughts: I don’t find this episode as creepy as other people do.

State: Maryland.

Special Minor Character of the Episode: Tom Colton.

Special Prop of the Episode: The Microfiche Projector.

Mulder’s Theory: A 100 year old serial killer is going around and overpowering 6 ft something men.

Scully’s Scientific Explanation: Genetic mutation.

Inappropriate Mulder Humour: That entire Reticulan speech.

Inappropriate 90’s Terminology:  😞

Scully’s Favourite Sentence(s): Are you suggesting I go before the Violent Crimes Unit…

Scully Doesn’t Suffer:  😡 (she gets attacked by Tooms

Mulder Drives: 😊

Scully Drives: 😊 (well, she’s sitting in a car that she must have driven over to the crime scene)

Brief Case Appearance:  😞

Sharing Glasses:  😞

Scully Says OMG:  😞

Scully Autopsy:  😞

Scully Smiles:  😞

Scully Writes a Report: 😊

Scully Ditch:  ❌

Scully Pyjamas:  😞

Scully Wears A Skirt:  😞

Stupid Tiny Gun Watch:  😡

Mulder’s Hand on Scully’s Back:  😞

Mulder and Scully Talk On The Phone:  😞

Scully Costume Change: 8.

 Below the cut are my thoughts throughout the episode. You don’t have to read them if you don’t want to. 

Awkward soft porn music…

Plot twist, it’s Pennywise in the drain.

So why didn’t the dude go grey when Tooms sees him? Were his Tooms eyes not working here?

Question: How is Tooms unscrewing the screw that should be screwed into a wall?

Tooms be strong. That door busted.

Oh look it’s this dick! Remember when Scully had friends then she met Mulder and he was her only friend.

She seems so far away from him. Good, stay away from him, Scully!

That’s a lie. He’s lying.

Yes let’s look at these possibly gruesome pictures while eating lunch. Great idea.

“Mrs Spooky…” that’s kinda cute.

You’re making everyone uncomfortable now, Mulder.

This scene is so stupid. Tom’s confused, Scully wants to die, and Mulder’s having the time of his life.

Omg Mulder is wearing gloves.

It could be a koala. Koala’s have ten inch fingerprints.

I love her outfit here.

She’s wearing the shirt from Ice.

So why is Scully doing the profiling? She’s a mEDiCaL dOcToR, not a profiler.

“Working in an area that’s a bit more down to earth” cue laughing. That’s not funny. That’s a shit joke. Don’t laugh at Scully, she’ll whoop yo ass.

Red pants, really?

Mulder got grandpa clothes on.

Remember when they requested backup?

What the fuck is that STANCE??? Someone give these two a LESSON please.

“She’s not in the car!” What?

Mulder shook that Sculls is right. Get used to it.

I don’t like this hairstyle Scully’s got going on…soz.

The worried look Scully gives Mulder.

Tooms has such a baby face.

Again, why is she profiling? That’s not her job!!!

This dude is worse than Tom, fuck me.

Do not shout at that woman you utter asshole.

She needs to fix that collar, it’s annoying me.

She doesn’t need you protecting her!!!! Piss. Off.

Hey, touch the necklace once and it works, don’t touch it twice.

Scully likes Mulder more than those other twats and I don’t blame her.

They sit any closer they be sitting on each other…not that I’m complaining.

But it could be a koala.

This is a nice house.

I would have been cooler had we not seen Tooms in the beginning. It makes sense to see him now though.

That’s a real dude going down that chimney. Also the bones popping…ew.

This dude looks like the other dude.

Can we maybe stop with the touching props that have relevance later please. Let me use my EYES.

Considering they had a load of beef with the director, that shot of Tooms coming out of the shadows was a really good shot.

And awkward slow-mo bit. Honestly, it’s so weird.

Scully doesn’t like you anymore, go away.

Or it could be a koala.

This thing is disgusting get it out of my face.

Ant-eye is such a foreign pronunciation to me. It always throws me off whenever I hear it.

A mood.

“Never was born.” I think you got your words mixed up.

“I’ve been waiting 75 years for you.” *cut to Scully*. I don’t think that shot was intended to be funny but it is and I laugh every time.

What is a Sheriff?

Mulder sitting on a poof.

I don’t know if that Tooms is doing is on par with the Holocaust like.

He got some livers finding in his boxes.

Omg he actually does I fucking forgot omg.

And he looks the exact same…shocker.

Pierre Paris…can you get anymore French than that?

Credit scene!

That’s a tiny ass room. My studio is bigger than that shit.

When she tucks the gun into her pants. Omg I am gay.

It’s adorable that Scully fits and Mulder is technically crouching.

Does he learn from touching bile? No he does not. At least he didn’t eat it.

Finagling.

Snagged.

Remember Scully’s necklace? No? Well it’s a good job Mulder touched it before. Now you remember.

“You got it…Spooky.” *cue laughter.* Honestly these jokes aren’t funny. Come up with funnier jokes if you’re going to laugh.

Do not come barging into a room that Scully is occupying and start shouting at her!!!

SHE’S STILL A GOOD AGENT!!!!

You just got told, Dickface!

I’d make a comment about Mulder talking to himself but I do that to so…

That’s an ugly ass phone. I don’t like it.

Is this the first time we see Scully’s apartment?

Also why does Tooms beeline for Scully anyway?

That’s unfortunate.

Why hasn’t she taken off her shoes yet?

Good job that person came out of that door at that moment otherwise he’d be stuck outside.

I really like how they work together to cuff him

Question: why doesn’t he just make his arm skinny and slip out of the handcuffs? I don’t think he knows he’ll get shot at the moment he goes for Scully again.

Tooms be the weird kid at the back of the class who be sniffing glue.

She touched him.

Final Thoughts: Tooms is creepy but I don’t find the episode creepy. That final shot with the music. I’m so glad Tom Colton never came back- or those other dudes- because they are all just assholes and I don’t like them. I like Squeeze, it can definitely hold my interest for 45 minutes.

[space-blue]

The Esper’s Tears

Her name is Yuri. It's a boy's name, but she loves it. It was given to her by the man–the first thing she owned that no one could take away, and the first man Yuri had met with more ability than her. He'd taken her off the streets, cared for her, taught her to rein in her powers, and lots of new skills.

He'd turned her world upside down.

Your imagination is your limit Yuri, he'd say, if you want a necklace of water, make it so, if you want the drops to fall to the sky, make their up into down! And he was right. The man had always been right–and nice, and not scared of her.

Now the man is dead, and Yuri is on a rampage.

•••

'Status report, unit one, report!'

'Quit it, Randall! They're dead.'

'If that explosion was that bastard Svarenko taking them down with him, how come the chief and Bart just went off the radar? What the fuck is going on?!'

'Use your senses, heck, use your eyes! That's another esper!'

The soldiers risk a glance over their ragged cover, to the body floating fifteen metres up, silhouetted by crackling plasma and a cloud of orbiting debris.

'Oh man, this wasn't in the mission briefing!'

•••

Before she had a name, in the nettle-infested ditch of the Past she never thought she would climb out of, Yuri had been Alone, with-a-capital-A. Too different to belong with the curb-squatting, glue-sniffing urchins she shared the streets with, too powerful to risk attracting the adults' attention, she'd spent years roaming the city, its many wonders locked behind cold glass, often leaving her feeling like it was her who was trapped in a vitrine, and the rest of the world rolling by, an endless show of things for her to see and desire but never own, lest she steal or got lucky at the bottom of some bin.

She'd used her powers sparingly: while other destitute kids chased down the likewise destitute cats and sent them hurling toward clothes lines, aiming at new jeans and hoping they'd claw them and fall back down together, she could will the clothes to her. She could part the garbage without sullying her hands, she stayed dry under the rain, and could reach any roof for the best hiding spots. But not much more, for the three kids she'd known who'd had a shred of power in them had all disappeared-the girl with the red curls, the boy who stole pastries though the windows, and Vanya's baby brother from the south church orphanage–gone.

•••

Her powers are melting reality around her, churning pockets of matter bubbling and fizzing out of existence. Gravity is a mess, with Yuri as the eye of a typhoon of psychic energy and tears. Her eyes well, their water rising, each bat of her lashes sending the salty drops to swirl above her head. Even through the blur she can see the ruins under her feet of the home the man had made for them. A hiding spot from all the world's troubles, he'd called it. Your new home. Blown away now in twenty chunks of dust by the attack of twenty cowards.

She prods for the twelve survivors, their weak esper minds struggling against hers.

There is no one to stop her, no one to save the men from her.

•••

They had come in the quiet of the night.

The man had been dozing, the book he'd been reading to her resting on his chin. She'd delicately brushed his silver-blond hair from his brow and daydreamed of a future in which she dared to call him papa. Or da. Anything to reflect the love that had grown to bursting inside her. In her fantasy he'd smile and laugh and make her fly, high on the wind. They'd sensed the approaching threat simultaneously, heads snapping up, dreams discarded, alerted by the the soldiers' foul fear, the collective mass of their doubts, and the unrepressed waves of their own ability.

'Yuri, these men are psychics, espers like you and me.'

'But not strong like us.'

'No but they can work together, it makes them dangerous. Do you remember what I told you?'

'There's only twenty...'

'Yuri!'

'Yes but can't I stay with you? I know I–'

'No buts. They're only after me, and they can't find out about you.'

It used to be that no one knew or cared. Before the man, she'd not even been 'Yuri', just another freak kid that all the others made great efforts to avoid. Now in this person's eyes she had positive value. She mattered. The gears of her powerful mind tripped and grind at the thought of losing him.

'Do you remember?'

•••

A soldier steps forward, anonymous behind his kevlar vest and balaclava, spearheading a mental attack. It ricochets on her shields with a spark. Yuri knows she cannot alter any creature with an opposing will, so she traps him in a bubble of vacuum. Fighting him over the air, heat, pressure. The man pushes back, but he lacks her intimate knowledge of coldness, hunger, the void you feel in absence of all things, the negation of life. When the soldier dies, she collapses the bubble with him in it, and terror shimmers in the eleven remaining minds.

Things are as she wills them, and she wills them dead, like the man, gone, like the man, never to be seen again, heard again, felt again, like the man!

•••

'I got blood on my hands.'

•••

She'd left running, on foot and empty-handed, all the new things the man had gotten her, an urchin's dream made true, left behind in her rush to obey his orders to stay hidden and undetectable. She'd stopped when the explosion behind her took away all awarness of him. He'd sacrificed himself to protect her.

Anger rose like magma in her throat.

•••

'I'm a wanted man.'

•••

There is nothing to stop Yuri from annihilating the soldiers. She has no greater understanding of what the man's wishes might have been, in sending her away, what hopes he'd entertained for her well-being, what morals he'd planed to instil in her. She was raised in the streets, where the most brutal of materialism applies, and death attains its most complete form: it makes no sense to think for the dead or wonder about their opinion or wishes. They are dead.

•••

'Do you understand?'

•••

'Please, oh fuck, please!'

The final soldier flails helplessly on his back, crushed by a pressure he cannot shake off. She steps through the mist of blood she turned his last teammate into. Everything went so fast, he cannot think, not with her animosity rubbing his mind raw. He sees a girl-shaped mass of hate, the edges of her being growing fuzzier, her eyes pits of light, her fluttering pink pyjamas the most human thing about her. Her aura seems to bend the moonlight in a million colours that hurt the eye, sending arcing fingers of deadly thunder groping the air for something to curl around. In despair he pitches all he has to free himself, to inch away from the weight that vows to merge him with the cracking concrete.

•••

'It's not what I want for you.'

•••

She steps forward, mindless, lost in her rage, completing the task she set herself, ready to lose that last bit of purpose to her life.

'Oi, Yuri!'

Two large hands slap the sides of her face, crashing right through her shields, ringing her ears.

'What the hell are you doing, didn't I tell you to run away?'

It's the man, come out of thin air. Everything stops, roaring silence blanketing them: the surviving soldier, the man who ought to be dead, and the girl who looks just like a ragged ten years-old about to cry her eyes out.

The man looks around, his hands never leaving Yuri's face.

'Sheesh, no wonder they didn't follow me, and I'm barely back in time... Couldn't you trust me Yuri? Do you think I'd have left you alone like that, if I couldn't fight these punks? Ah, don't cry now–'

He picks her up, cradling her spindly body in his arms and shoulder. She curls there to sob, to turn back into the child she's hardly begun to learn how to be.

'I'm sorry kid. I should have told you the whole plan,' he murmurs in her hair, patting her head, 'I should have trusted you more too. I won't leave you again.'

He turns to the soldier who has not yet dared twitch a muscle.

'What's your name, you lucky idiot?'

'Haaah–Randall!'

'You go back home, Randall. Bag whatever is left of your friends and give it to Marlow, or whoever runs the CIA these days,' the man bends forward, his eyes blazing white hot, 'you tell him that Vitomir Svarenko says hi, and to leave my daughter and I alone.'

~~ January 2017 – Theme : Urban Fantasy

[quickeningheart]

Twenty-Four

   "You guys got back awfully late last night," came Charley's idle comment at breakfast the next morning. "Where'd you go?"

   Alley paused, fork in mouth, as three pairs of curious eyes turned her way. Behind her, she could almost feel Stoker's smirk. She affected her best casual air. "No place special," she mumbled around her fried eggs. "Just took a drive around the city and then walked a bit."

   "Crashed a wedding," Stoker added, making her choke on the eggs.

   "We did not!" She glared over her shoulder. "They didn't know we were there, remember?"

   His eyes crinkled as he grinned. "You're a pretty good dancer. You only stepped on my toes twice," he teased.

   Cheeks growing hot, she turned her back on him. "'Cause your big feet kept getting in the way," she grumbled, shoveling more eggs into her mouth.

   "Hmmm…" Charley waggled her eyebrows. "You do know what they say about men and big feet, right?"

   The mice exchanged confused glances. "Nope," Stoker admitted. "What do they say?"

   Alley slapped down her fork. "For heaven's sake, Charley, don't encourage him!"

   Her cousin laughed, and Alley decided she'd had enough breakfast. "I'm done," she muttered, getting up to take her plate to the sink. She turned to leave the room, only to be brought up short by a tug on her ankle. She glanced down to find the tip of a metal tail had snaked around it, holding her in place. Her glare snapped up to clash with Stoker's impish gaze and she pursed her lips with displeasure, raising an eyebrow.

   "Sorry, honey. It's got a mind of its own sometimes," he said, the very picture of innocence.

   "Yeah. And I'll bet it's attached to your dick," she snapped, yanking her leg free.

   Vinnie guffawed and Charley nearly spit out her coffee. Modo raised his single eye heavenward with a sigh, shaking his head. Throttle raised an eyebrow and peered at her over his specs, amused.

   Stoker just grinned and gave her a wink. "Cheeky brat."

   "Horny goat," she shot back, turning to stomp off to her room, their laughter following her.

     ~*~*~*~*~

   Alley tried to tell herself that Throttle wasn't really avoiding her; it was just coincidence that every time she tried to get him alone, he was nowhere to be found. She'd been trying for most of the week to corner him and talk, to no avail. As determined as she was to hash things out and get it all sorted, he seemed equally determined to ignore her altogether.

   Her frustration was reaching its boiling point, and on Friday morning, after spending nearly an hour searching for him—Really, how does a six-and-a-half-foot mouse just up and disappear?—she decided that enough was enough.

   She stomped down to the garage, where Modo and Vinnie were tinkering around in the engine of a beat-up minivan. Charley had decided to take Alley up on her suggestion of having the boys help out more around the garage, and had dragged in an old clunker of a van for them to work on. "If you fellas can get this thing up and running and not manage to blow up my garage in the process," she'd challenged, "then I'll know you're ready and able to take on the real work."

   Throttle was, of course, nowhere to be found. But his bike was parked right next to the other two in its usual spot, so he had to be around there somewhere. Right? Her eyes narrowed. "Anyone seen Throttle lately?" she asked with as much sweetness as she could muster.

   The two mice exchanged glances. "He was around a little while ago," Modo said.

   "Yeah, 'til Charley came in, sayin' you were lookin' for 'im. He muttered somethin' about somethin' an' took off like his tail was on fire," Vinnie added with a shrug. "Ain't seen 'im since."

   "I knew it!" Alley stamped her foot and muttered a string of words that made both of them raise their eyebrows in astonishment. "He's been treating me like a walking disease all week! I wanna know what bug crawled up his ass, and I wanna know now." She pinned them with a glare. "I don't suppose either of you could shed a light on the subject?"

   The bros exchanged uneasy glances. "You should be askin' Throttle," Vinnie mumbled, focusing his attention back on the engine. "I dunno nothin'."

   "Gladly! Any ideas on how to glue his feet to the floor? Seems like the only way I can get him to stand still long enough to talk! Is he pissed off at me about something?"

   "Nah, he ain't pissed," Modo denied. "I think he's feelin' guilty."

   "Because of … what happened the other night? Because of Carbine?" Her cheeks turned pink. "We didn't get that carried away," she complained. "It's not like we slept together or anything."

   "I ain't hearin' this!" Vinnie screwed up his face and stuck his fingers in his ears.

   Modo huffed. "It ain't 'cause of Carbine why he's feelin' guilty." He paused to consider. "Well, okay, maybe it is. A bit. But I think it's more 'cause of … well, that." He gestured vaguely at her, and she glanced down at herself, confused.

   "Sorry, I'm not following."

   "Those, ya know … the bruises all over ya," he mumbled.

   Alley couldn't be sure, but she suspected he was blushing. Vinnie definitely was; his ears had turned dull pink through the fur to prove it. Unfortunately, so was she, if the heat in her face was any indication. She sputtered, "What, haven't you guys ever seen hickeys before? The way he was—" She cut herself off, shaking her head. "It's normal! And most of 'em are faded already! 'Sides, I'm sure he's left plenty of 'em all over Carbine in the past!"

   "I ain't hearin' this!" Vinnie scowled at her.

   She scowled back. "Then little boys ought to leave the room until the grownups finish talking," she snapped, earning a laugh from Modo.

   "Look, I dunno what Throttle an' Carbine get up to when they're together, but considerin' she's covered in fur, whatever it is ain't so … so…"

   "So glaringly obvious," Vinnie finished with a snort.

   Alley felt like she'd been punched. "So, you're saying he's … what? Disgusted every time he looks at me now? Guess he should've thought of that when he was practically ravishing me by the lake!"

   Vinnie abruptly threw down the wrench he was holding and muttered something about root beer before stomping out of the garage. They watched him go for a second, before Alley shook her head. "He's gonna have to get used to it if he's gonna insist on dating my cousin," she said dryly. "I'm sure he'll be leaving his fair share of bruises on her in the future." She grimaced. "Actually, I kind've agree with him. Stuff I don't wanna know."

   Modo chuckled. "Those two'll be fine. As for you an' Throttle, it ain't that he's disgusted. Like I said, he's feelin' guilty. He ain't got experience with humans, ya know. Ya'll are so delicate compared to us. He probably thinks he hurt you. An' where we come from, any male hurts a female is the lowest sorta scum."

   Alley sighed and shook her head. "That dumbass," she muttered. "Why do I always manage to fall for the boneheads? My taste in men sucks."

   He raised an eyebrow at that, a corner of his mouth pulling up. "Guess you two really do gotta have a chat," he commented idly. "Ya look up on the roof yet? We don't go up there much in summer. Too hot. But with the weather coolin' down an' all, makes for a pretty good thinkin' spot."

   In point of fact, the roof was the one place Alley hadn't even considered checking, given it was flat, dirty, and held nothing of interest. And yes, much too hot during the day, especially for those rare folk who happened to wear fur coats all year round.

   "Thanks. I'll take a look," she mumbled distractedly as she turned on her heel to head up to the apartment, hardly hearing the amused "Good luck!" that followed her.

     ~*~*~*~*~

   Throttle was indeed on the roof. He sat cross-legged on top of the small metal utility shed that housed the building's breaker switches and several maintenance supplies. His back was toward her and, given that he hadn't even turned his head when hers appeared over the top of the fire escape, he must have been deep in thought.

   Or maybe he'd just fallen asleep; she couldn't really tell from that angle.

   Alley sucked on her teeth, pondering the best way to get his attention as she crept quietly over the ledge onto the roof. Shoving him off the shed felt like a good idea, but after a moment's thought, she settled for a more subtle approach.

   She shuffled at the gravel with one foot, searching until she found a suitable stone, slightly rounded from wear and not too large. Would have made an excellent skipping stone at the lake, she mused as she hefted it in her hand a few times, testing its weight. Ah, well. It was adequate for her purpose now. She drew back her arm, took careful aim, and lobbed it across empty space toward her target. She had just enough time to think she'd have gotten at least five skips out of that one, before the pebble inevitably reached its goal and bounced smartly off the back of Throttle's head.

   He yelped in shock and, to her delight, she had the added bonus of watching him fall off the utility shed anyway, landing on the opposite side. Score!

   He popped up in an instant, glaring around the rooftop, shades knocked askew. Surprise flickered when his eyes landed on her before the glower returned full-force. "What did ya do that for?" he snapped, rubbing his abused skull.

   "There," she sniffed, crossing her arms. "I just put a bruise on your thick head. We're even. Now will you kindly stop acting like such a jackass?"

   He gaped at her for a second. "H-huh?"

   She pursed her lips, eyes narrowing. "We need to talk."

   His expression shuttered and he turned his back to her again. "Ain't got nothin' to say," he mumbled. Then he yelped when a second pebble bounced off his skull. "Ow!" He glared over his shoulder. "Stop that!"

   "It's funny. All these weeks I thought you were a giant talking mouse, not a giant talking chicken dressed like one," she taunted.

   He glowered. "You lookin' for a fight?"

   "Sure!" She held up both fists. "If that's what it takes to get you to open your big mouth and talk to me, bring it! I can take ya!"

   He gaped at her … and then promptly dissolved into laughter, bending over and clutching his stomach in his mirth.

   She pouted. "Now who's lookin' for a fight?" she grumbled, dropping her hands to her sides. When he continued to chortle, she huffed. "Fine. Keep laughing. When I break your arm you won't think it's so funny." Of course that threat only served to make him laugh harder, leaning against the shed for support. Despite herself, her own lips started twitching in response. He looked so cute when he was caught in the throes of uncontrollable hilarity.

   His chortles finally died, and he leaned back to catch his breath, wiping his eyes under his specs.

   "Better?" she asked with saccharine sarcasm.

   He glanced at her, a snort escaping as his mouth started twitching all over again. At her glare, he managed to pull himself together, jerking his chin at the shed before hopping up to its roof again.

   Taking it as an invitation, Alley climbed the rusty ladder screwed into the wall, seating herself beside him on the roof with her legs dangling over the edge. "So," she began amicably, "why are you avoiding me? Is it because of the other night? I'm sorry. Maybe I should've stopped it sooner, but I was kinda … caught up in the moment." She blushed and glanced away. "I'd go back in time and fix it, but that's not really an option. So can't you just forgive me and move on?"

   "Th-that ain't why—I'm not mad at you," he sputtered, gaping at her.

   "Then why have you been skulking around acting like I've got some contagious plague all week? The only time I ever see you is when everyone is together. It's like you're afraid to be alone with me."

   He pushed up his specs to rub at his eyes in a tired gesture. "I already said I don't blame you for any of this. I'm the one who lost my cool," he muttered. "I got too carried away. I … hurt you." He looked down at his hands folded in his lap, shamefaced. "All those marks … I didn't know I'd been so rough with you."

   Alley sighed deeply, reached up … and calmly brought her fist to the back of his head.

   "Ow!" he yelped in shock. "Why do you keep hitting me?"

   "Because you seem to be permanently stuck in stupid mode," she said dryly. "I figured whacking the reset button a few times might knock you out of it, but it doesn't seem to be working."

   His jaw dropped, eyes wide behind his specs as he sputtered for a comeback.

   "Throttle, if you'd been hurting me, do you honestly believe I'd have let it continue?" she snapped. "Sure, you're bigger and heavier than me, but one well-placed knee to the groin would've put an end to it real fast. I doubt even big, tough Martian mice are immune to that sort of pain."

   He flinched, shifting away ever-so-slightly, and she chuckled. "But … I bit you," he reminded her, embarrassed.

   She considered. "Yeah. You did. That kinda stung. Don't do it again," she told him sternly. When he proceeded to look even more miserable, she rolled her eyes and gave him a playful shove. "I'm teasing, you idiot. Stop looking like I just kicked your puppy."

   He frowned and turned to stare out across the city. She gave his arm a shake to draw his attention back to her. "Look, the important thing here is that when I told you to, you stopped. There aren't a whole lotta guys I can say that about," she continued. "Most of the dates I've had, those guys wouldn't back off so easily. They could have definitely used a lesson or two from you on how to respect a girl's wishes."

   He shrugged, looking away again. "Their mamas didn't raise 'em right, that's all," he mumbled.

   "Their mamas didn't raise 'em at all. I suspect most of 'em probably crawled out of a sewer, given their manners," she joked, trying to get him to smile. It didn't work. She sighed and idly kicked her feet against the metal wall.

   "Why date 'em then?" he asked after a moment.

   She blushed faintly, shrugging one shoulder and looking away. "They asked. And they were all cute, so why not? I've always liked a pretty face. I'm kinda shallow that way," she mumbled, embarrassed to admit it to him.

   He considered for a moment before sliding her a sidelong glance. "This mean you think I'm cute?" he teased.

   She blinked at him, surprised, before a smirk touched her lips. "First off, what we had wasn't a date," she sniffed. "But … sure. You're not hard on the eyes." She gave an offhand shrug. "Once you get past all the fur."

   "Gee, thanks," he deadpanned.

   She smiled. "I wouldn't have made out with you if I didn't like you, Throttle."

   He glanced away, shifting uneasily. "What about Stoker?"

   Her smile disappeared. "What about Stoker?"

   "You two've been awful chummy lately, takin' all those late-night rides and all," he mumbled.

   Her frown deepened. "Well, yeah. It's part of the plan. Remember? That plan where I go into Limburger's tower, risking life and limb to hand over a set of papers that'll hopefully bring the next big bang to his planet?"

   "That ain't what I meant."

   She shook her head, confused. "This setup depends on Limburger believing that I weaseled the info away from Stoker, and to do that, he needs to see us together. As often as possible. So us going into the city and acting all … lovey and stuff is kinda necessary. But it's just a ruse. It doesn't mean jack. Besides, we haven't done more than hold hands. Well, he's walked with an arm around my shoulders once or twice. And there was the dancing that first night. But that's it! He knows not to push the boundaries."

   "Maybe not. But that doesn't mean he doesn't have his sights on you."

   Alley cocked her head. "Are you jealous?" she asked, a slow grin spreading across her lips.

   "What? No!" he yelped, eyes wide. "I just don't wanna go steppin' on anyone's toes, is all! Bros before babes. It's the Freedom Fighters' Code!"

   "How unbelievably sexist of you," she sniffed. "I suppose the 'babes' don't get any say in the matter?"

   "No, that ain't—"

   "What are you so worked up about, anyway? You have a girlfriend." Alley turned in her seat, crossing her legs under her to face him fully, expression serious. "Let me make it clear. In case you didn't already figure it out, I really like you, Throttle. Like, way more than any of those other guys I dated. There's this saying, you gotta kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince. Well…" She blushed and glanced away, shifting. "You're my prince," she mumbled shyly. Upon seeing his astonished expression, she hastened to add, "But I don't have any intention of getting between you and Carbine! And I don't have any desire to be some stand-in for her until you can see her again. You are unavailable and I respect that."

   He tried to talk, but she held up a hand.

   "As for Stoker, he flirts a lot but … flirting is just flirting. And I can't really take him seriously when he acts that way. I don't dislike him, though. I respect him, and I certainly don't intend to play on his supposed feelings just because the guy I want doesn't want me back. That's a shitty thing to do to anyone."

   Throttle looked like he wanted to protest, but the rumble of an approaching truck caught her attention, drawing her eyes to the road. A large, bulky van was lumbering down the street, bouncing over the pitted ruts, swerving to avoid the worst of them. It started to slow as it reached the garage. "Oh. Charley's supplies delivery must be in. Guess I'd better go help her check them in," she said, getting to her feet. She suddenly wanted this conversation to be over, embarrassed that she had said so much. Had she really just told Throttle he was her prince? Like some sappy little teenage fangirl? She supposed she could be grateful that he hadn't laughed her clean off the roof. Ugh.

   She stretched the kinks out of her back, dusting stray rust flakes off her jean shorts. "Anyway," she said, turning to face him and forcing a smile to her face, "how about we both do ourselves a favor and just pretend this entire thing never happened, okay? Just put it out of our heads. We're friends, that's it. I don't make any weird advances, and you don't tiptoe around acting like I'm gonna jump your bones next time I see you. Deal?" She held out her hand.

   He gazed at it as he got slowly to his feet, his own hand extending. His fingers slid and meshed with hers, palms pressed together. Her heart skipped a few beats at the contact. "Maybe that ain't why I was avoidin' you," he murmured, his serious gaze meeting hers over the top of his specs. "Maybe I was just tryin' to avoid temptation." He stepped closer, eyes lidding. "Knowin' how you feel … it's makin' things mighty difficult," he added, his husky voice deepening to a low, sensual purr. "Maybe it's your bones you should be worryin' about."

   She sucked in a breath as his free hand slid into her hair. His thumb stroked lightly along her jaw and she unconsciously leaned into his touch. "Th-that's not fair," she protested around a shaky sigh. "H-how are we supposed to stay friends when you keep saying such unfriendly things?"

   She felt his heat as he stepped even closer, breath stirring her hair. "Maybe we ain't," he replied, before his mouth came to rest against her parted lips.

   He kissed softly, slow and gentle, and although she wanted to protest, she was helpless to act as he draped her arms around his shoulders, then slid his about her waist, pulling her close. His tongue dipped in, tasting carefully, and she was lost in his scent and taste and touch, just as incredible as she remembered. His tail snaked around her leg, and she decided that she was perfectly content to stand there and let him thoroughly seduce her on the hot, dirty tin roof.

   Unfortunately, the loud, highly-obnoxious clearing of a throat quickly put an end to that idea.

   They broke apart with startled gasps, panting for breath, staring at each other with wide eyes before turning reluctant gazes toward the fire escape.

   Alley was both gratified and annoyed to find Charley standing on the ladder, chin propped on the crossed arms resting on the ledge as she watched the show with raised eyebrows. "Sorry to disrupt, kids, but Stoker just brought home a very nice surprise. Thought you'd both like to know." Without another word, she clambered down the ladder.

   They glanced at each other, before Throttle hopped off the shed, reached up to lift her down, letting her slide along his body until her feet touched ground. She forced her shaky legs to move as she followed him along the rooftop to the fire escape, clambering down to her bedroom window and climbing in. He was already at the apartment stairs, and she hastened to keep up as he took them easily.

   There were people in the garage, she realized. Several of them. And she didn't know them. And every single one of them had fur and tails. She stopped dead in her tracks, nearly running into Throttle's back; he had also stopped to gape, looking as flabbergasted as she felt. "Who are they?" she whispered.

   One mouse in particular seemed to have caught his attention, his eyes locked on a small female with pale gray fur and long black hair. She turned to him, a smile brightening her scarred face at the sight of him. "Hey there, stranger," she called softly, and Alley felt an immediate sinking in the pit of her stomach. She knew who this was.

   "C-Carbine." The name slipped from Throttle's mouth on an astonished breath, and all the strength seemed to flood from his legs as he abruptly dropped to the floor.

[seldnei]

We just watched “Airplane!” with the 13 year old, and I had the brilliant idea that they should just gender-flip that entire movie.

Brie Larsen is Ted Striker.

Lucy Liu in the Robert Stack role. (so she can beat the crap out of all the missionaries at the airport!)

CCH Pounder in the Leslie Nielsen role.

Allison Janney in the Lloyd Bridges role. (I feel that Allison Janney, who we all know can be a comedic actress, might be pushing it a little, since the original idea of Airplane! was to take these men known for Serious Roles in Disaster Movies and spoof both their archetypes and the genre, so you want serious actresses, but I also really want to hear CJ Cregg say, “I guess I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.”)

Obviously some of the more ... shall we say ... early-80s jokes would have to be rewritten, but the bulk of it can stay pretty much the same.

Oh, and Lin-Manuel Miranda plays the Ethel Merman part. Either as himself like she did, or as Ethel Merman, whichever.

[puddlesthewitch]

The Perfect High

There once was a boy named Gimme-Some-Roy... He was nothin' like me or you,

'cause laying back and getting high was all he cared to do.

As a kid, he sat in the cellar...sniffing airplane glue. And then he smoked banana peels, when that was the thing to do. He tried aspirin in Coca-Cola, he breathed helium on the sly, and his life became an endless search to find the perfect high.

But grass just made him wanna lay back and eat chocolate-chip pizza all night,

and the great things he wrote when he was stoned looked like shit in the morning light.

Speed made him wanna rap all day, reds laid him too far back, Cocaine-Rose was sweet to his nose, but the price nearly broke his back.

He tried PCP, he tried THC, but they never quite did the trick. Poppers nearly blew his heart, mushrooms made him sick. Acid made him see the light, but he couldn't remember it long. Hash was a little too weak, and smack was a lot too strong. Quaaludes made him stumble, booze just made him cry, Then he heard of a cat named Baba Fats who knew of the perfect high.

Now, Baba Fats was a hermit cat...lived high up in Nepal, High on a craggy mountain top, up a sheer and icy wall. "Well, hell!" says Roy, "I'm a healthy boy, and I'll crawl or climb or fly,

Till I find that guru who'll give me the clue as to what's the perfect high."

So out and off goes Gimme-Some-Roy, to the land that knows no time, Up a trail no man could conquer, to a cliff no man could climb. For fourteen years he climbed that cliff...back down again he'd slide . . .

He'd sit and cry, then climb some more, pursuing the perfect high.

Grinding his teeth, coughing blood, aching and shaking and weak, Starving and sore, bleeding and tore, he reaches the mountain peak. And his eyes blink red like a snow-blind wolf, and he snarls the snarl of a rat,

As there in repose, and wearing no clothes, sits the god-like Baba Fats.

"What's happenin', Fats?" says Roy with joy, "I've come to state my biz . . .

I hear you're hip to the perfect trip... Please tell me what it is. "For you can see," says Roy to he, "I'm about to die, So for my last ride, tell me, how can I achieve the perfect high?"

"Well, dog my cats!" says Baba Fats. "Another burned out soul, Who's lookin' for an alchemist to turn his trip to gold. It isn't in a dealer's stash, or on a druggist's shelf... Son, if you would find the perfect high, find it in yourself."

"Why, you jive mother-fucker!" says Roy, "I climbed through rain and sleet,

I froze three fingers off my hands, and four toes off my feet! I braved the lair of the polar bear, I've tasted the maggot's kiss. Now, you tell me the high is in myself? What kinda shit is this?

My ears, before they froze off," says Roy, "had heard all kindsa crap; But I didn't climb for fourteen years to hear your sophomore rap. And I didn't climb up here to hear that the high is on the natch, So you tell me where the real stuff is, or I'll kill your guru ass!"

"Okay...okay," says Baba Fats, "You're forcin' it outta me... There is a land beyond the sun that's known as Zabolee. A wretched land of stone and sand, where snakes and buzzards scream, And in this devil's garden blooms the mystic Tzutzu tree.

Now, once every ten years it blooms one flower, as white as the Key West sky,

And he who eats of the Tzutzu flower shall know the perfect high. For the rush comes on like a tidal wave...hits like the blazin' sun. And the high? It lasts forever, and the down don't never come.

But, Zabolee Land is ruled by a giant, who stands twelve cubits high, And with eyes of red in his hundred heads, he awaits the passer-by. And you must slay the red-eyed giant, and swim the river of slime, Where the mucous beasts await to feast on those who journey by. And if you slay the giant and beasts, and swim the slimy sea, There's a blood-drinking witch who sharpens her teeth as she guards the Tzutzu tree."

"Well, to hell with your witches and giants," says Roy, "To hell with the beasts of the sea--

Why, as long as the Tzutzu flower still blooms, hope still blooms for me."

And with tears of joy in his sun-blind eyes, he slips the guru a five, And crawls back down the mountainside, pursuing the perfect high.

"Well, that is that," says Baba Fats, sitting back down on his stone, Facing another thousand years of talking to God, alone. "Yes, Lord, it's always the same...old men or bright-eyed youth... It's always easier to sell 'em some shit than it is to tell them the truth."

Shel Silverstein

[acourtofhopeanddreams]

So in Love - Chapter 4

Written based on a “what if” I talked about in one of my canon compliance pieces for Theonsa

Chapter 1 // Chapter 2 // Chapter 3

The royal family is on its way to Winterfell and Sansa can’t stop talking about prince Joffrey. Normally Theon likes being in her company, but this time he just wants this visit to be over. Because the sooner prince Joffrey is gone again, the sooner Sansa will realise that her true love and handsome knight has always be there.

*This will probably be Theon dreaming about marrying Sansa for a long time, but I promise, he will get noticed at some point!*

“Who plans a hunting trip the day after a feast?” Theon tightly held onto the reigns of his horse. He still felt slightly unbalanced and a piercing headache was splitting his skull into two, but when his Lord and the King had asked him to accompany them, Robb and most of their men on this trip he had not really known how to say no. “It’s a day to spend in bed in the company of a pretty lady!” He raised his voice.

Robb shook his head and chuckled. “As if the lady you’ve set your eyes on would have joined you in that bed of yours.”

Theon felt his cheeks heating up and he licked his dry lips. “A guy can dream, right?”

“Is that what you’ve been doing all those times you’ve been telling me about those great adventures and nights you’ve had?” Robb raised his eyebrows. “Or are you the kinda guy who’s in love with one girl, but doesn’t mind satisfying his needs with the body of another?”

Theon took a deep breath. “Is this the part where you’re gonna tell me that I’m not good enough for your sister?” Theon turned his face towards his best friend. “You already made that clear. She will marry a King. I can’t compete with a King.” He dropped his shoulders and his horse slowed down. “Does it change anything if I say that every time I’ve been with another girl I dreamed she was your sister?”

“Honestly?” Robb furrowed his eyebrows. “I think it only makes it worse.” He had a playful smile around his lips though and slowly the caravan of hunters, on their way home already now the sun was setting, rode away from them. “And yet…” Robb paused for a long and agonising moment.

Technically Theon was their hostage, a price his father had to pay for his role in the rebellion and the side he chose at the time. But the Starks had never made Theon feel like a hostage. But sometimes, in the middle of the night or when one of the Starks started a sentence and took a very long time to finish, Theon feared they all of a sudden remembered again.

“You’d be good to her, I just know that.” Robb continued and Theon let out the breath he was holding, all of a sudden feeling a few pounds lighter once more. “I don’t know anything about prince Joffrey.” Robb forced his horse to stop and carefully he checked if none of the King’s soldiers had stayed behind to overhear their conversation. “And you know my sister just as well as I do. She is naive and in her mind all princes are charming and brave and perfect.”

It was one of Sansa’s most beautiful flaws. Even in this world, consumed by greed and a hunger for power, where every time someone ended up on the throne others already plotted to bring them down again, she only saw goodness. When she thought about war, she didn’t think about the killing and the screaming and the smell of burning fires. She thought about all the heroes saving the poor damsels in distress before anything bad could happen to them.

“Father wants to take her, Bran and Arya to King’s Landing.” Robb continued talking as if he hadn’t noticed that Theon’s mind had drifted off.

“King’s Landing?” Theon widened his eyes. “Were you just saying that your father is really planning on taking them South?” He shook his head in disbelief.

Ned couldn’t do that. He wasn’t allowed to do that.

Theon had it all figured out last night. Joffrey would leave Winterfell again, his hand promised to Sansa once she was of age and old enough to get married. After a while Sansa would stop dreaming about the prince, who would by then be nothing but a fading memory. And prince Joffrey would meet another maiden, not as pretty as Sansa, but just pretty enough and maybe from a more important family. King Robbert would forget about the engagement, a plan he had made hastily just so he could convince Ned to become his hand. And when Sansa would hear about the wedding, Theon would be there to comfort her and she would notice that she had actually stopped caring about the crown prince and that the prince of the Iron Islands was who she really wanted.

“He is.”

Theon’s daydream shattered and the million pieces exploded before he could gather them again to glue them together. “He can’t do that. They should stay with their mother, here in Winterfell. The South is no place for a Stark.” Everyone knew that. Even Theon knew that and he wasn’t even a Stark.

Robb’s lips were forming a straight line and he narrowed his eyes. “Father thinks Sansa might actually like it. She has always loved music and stories and feasts. Winterfell is not quite as alive as King’s Landing. She might not even want to come back home once she has tasted what the capital has to offer.”

“You have to stop him from taking her.” Theon’s voice sounded slightly higher than usual and every word trembled. “What if she gets hurt or even worse, what if something happens to her father and she’s all alone, far away from home?”

Robb’s glance met his and then Robb curled his lips up into a smile. “You really love her, do you?” He cocked his head and stared at his best friend. “I’ll see what I can do.” He planted his heels in his horse’s flanks and Theon did the same.

Quickly they caught up with the hunting party, but when they rode through the gates of Winterfell they found the courtyard completely empty and the deafening howling of the dire wolves sang in their ears.

“Father?” Sansa rushed out of the castle. Loose strands of red hair were dangling from her braids. Her eyes were red and swollen and traces of her tears were visible on her cheeks. “Father, you have to come quickly. Bran fell off of the old tower while climbing and the Maester isn’t sure if he’ll ever wake up again.”

Not only Ned jumped off of his horse as quickly as possible. Theon and Robb did so too.

“How did that happen?” While Robb and Ned rushed past Sansa, Theon stood still next to her.

“They don’t know.” Sansa sniffed and then she turned around to follow her father and brother. “But I don’t want him to die!”

Theon hesitantly wrapped an arm around her shaking shoulders. “Your brother is a Stark. I’m sure he’s not giving up that easily.”

“Do you think so?” She looked up at him and Theon allowed himself to drown in her beautiful blue eyes. “I’d give everything for him to live!”

“I’m sure you don’t have to give anything.” Theon lead her up the stairs towards her brother’s bedroom. “If we all pray for him, then maybe the Gods will help him to come back to us.”

“I hope so.” Sansa wrapped her arms around Theon and Theon felt his heart racing in his chest. “Shall we pray together tonight?”

A smile spread across Theon’s face while he embraced her and pressed her to his chest. “I’d love to.”

[thatssonanii]

Guess What

Parental Paragraphs / Daddy Ro Fluff Series

With Simba's birthday coming up the three families were spending a lot more time with each other. Trying to plan took all three sets of parents and the older boys running errands or babysitting. They spent this day at the Reigns' house.

"Y'all plan on havin another?" Jimmy asked his twin.

Jey shook his head immediately. "Hell no. Simba and Lo is enough. You see all these gray hairs."

"Well I want a lil girl," Apryl pouted.

"You must gon borrow Haleigh cause you won't get one from me. I'm gettin fixed."

Apryl pushed Jey's shoulder turning her attention to the other treo ladies. "What about y'all?"

"Jimmy wants another boy but I don't think my nerves can handle another boy. The twins and Eli are exactly like him," Trinity laughed. "No thank you."

Kandice shrugged at the question. "We want another but Koda and Haleigh have made it very clear that we're not allowed to have anymore."

"Yeah, Koda said his luck it'll be another girl," Roman laughed, "Princess stresses him out enough."

"STOP TOUCHIN MY HAIR!" Haleigh squealed loudly.

"NO WAY!" "NEVEEEEER!" The twins yelled after her.

Simba let out a loud attempt at his uncle's war cry. "HOLD HER DOWN! I GOT GLUE!"

"Who gave his bad ass glue," Apryl asked getting ready to get up. Jey stopped her telling her to wait. "She'll go to the boys first," Jey assured her. The next thing the parents heard were loud footsteps running from one end of the upstairs to the other. Then more arguing.

"STOP YELLING!" Koda's voice boomed through the house quieting the younger children. "Why are y'all yelling anyway?"

"THEY KEEP TRYING TO PUT GLUE IN MY HAIR," the 13 year old pouted.

"GET HER BRODDER! HOLD HER DOWN!" Simba yelled once again.

"SIMBA, GIVE ME THE GLUE! WHO GAVE YOUR BAD BUTT GLUE ANYWAY?" Milo asked in a strained tone that told the parents he was holding his little brother back. More commotion ensued which meant they were now fighting.

"AYE!" Eli screamed. "WHICH ONE OF YOU GREMLIN TWINS HIT ME IN MY EYE?"

"LET ME GO, KODA! I'M GONNA TAKE THAT LIL MUNCHKIN OUT!"

"NO, HAE! AUNTIE APRYL WILL TAKE YOU OUT!"

"GET THOSE DOUBLEMINT TWINS OFF MY HAIR, KODA!"

Kandice reached out to pat Roman’s knee and he called out for the children to come down. A minute or so later the seven children came down the stairs still pushing and arguing quietly. They stood in the living room in front of their parents. Eli reached out to pluck his little brothers behind their ears for hitting him in the eye which started another fight between all of them.

"Hands in your pocket!" Jey yelled stopping their fighting. "Now what is the problem?"

All the kids stated to talk at once. There was something about glue in hair, playing a game, complaints about being hit and kicked and Simba just letting out another war cry.

"STOP! STOP! One at a time." Trinity sighed. "Hae, you first."

"I was watching YouTube, minding my business and those munchkins tried to attack me and put glue in my hair," she said glaring at her younger cousins. "Then they tried to attack me and my KoKo." Koda wrapped his arms around his little sister for the dramatic effect.

"Okay. Milo?"

"All I know is they ran in there jumping on us then bad butt," he said flicking Simba's arm, "Told me to hold her down and tried to attack again." Simba glared at his big brother then kicked him in the shin making Milo yelp.

"Feet to yourself," Trinity repeated. "Eli?"

"Look, all I know is one of these gremlins hit me in my eye and if it's bruised they're both bein put up for adoption."

"Jadyn and Jalyn, y'all have something to say?"

"No, Mommy," they answered.

"Simba?"

"AAAAAAAAAAH!" He yelled jumping on Haleigh’s feet.

"Oh that's it," she sneered picking the young boy up and turned him upside down. "Koda, open the back door. He's goin in the pool."

"Koda, don't you move. Princess, give him to his parents," Roman instructed quickly. Haleigh narrowed her eyes and tossed the young boy into his father's lap. "Who gave you glue, Simba?"

Simba laid against Jey's chest trying to look as innocent as possible. "It was in TK room. I borrow it."

"Were you supposed to be in there, Josiah?"

"No, Daddy. But Jadyn open the door."

"Hey! That was not me, that was Jalyn!" The eight year old said pointing an accusatory finger.

"Snitch," Jalyn mumbled.

"Stop arguing. No more arguing," Kandice demanded softly. "Y'all have done enough of that for one day. All of you sit down and calm down." None of the children moved just glared at one another.

"I think she told y'all to sit y'all asses down." Apryl repeated with a slight raise of her brow. She watched them all until they sat down peacefully.

Jimmy started to laugh catching them all off guard. "Y'all remember when we didn't have kids?"

Jey nodded. "Good times."

"Don't talk about us like we not here. That hurts," Eli asserted touching his chest.

"Yeah," the other kids agreed.

Apryl shrugged at him. "We love y'all but y'all are A LOT."

"But wait," Kandice laughed, "Remember when we told them we were pregnant with the boys?" Jey, Jimmy and Roman sucked their teeth at the thought.

--- 16.5 years earlier ---

The women invited their fiancés over to their shared apartment for dinner and a surprise. "Sooooo, are y'all gonna say anything?" Kandice asked. Apryl, Kandice and Trinity had just watched their other halves open their cards. And now they sat in silence.

(Jey's Card, Roman’s Card & Jimmy's Card)

Jey looked at his card, at his fiancé then back at the card. "I'm confused."

Roman scratched the back of his neck, still staring at the card. "What's a DILF?"

"I ain't make shit."

All three women sucked their teeth. "God I hope these babies have our brains," Apryl huffed.

"Babies? Who having a baby? I didn't agree to none of that," Jimmy said quickly.

Trinity sucked her teeth. "I think we both agreed to it when you let your little swimmers loose."

"Kandi," Roman called softly, "You still didn't tell me what a DILF is."

"Dad I'd Like to Fuck, slowness. But now I dunno about all that."

"So y'all tryna tell us that the three of y'all just happened to get pregnant at the same time?" Jey asked putting the card in his lap. "Y'all planned this."

"Clearly, I did. Did you read the card? I trapped your ass, now you're stuck and if you think you're leaving me with your big head baby you've got another thing coming, Fatu."

Jimmy got up from his seat to examine Trinity, stepping back in surprise when he lifted her shirt. "What's that?" He asked pointing at her stomach.

"It's a baby bump, fool. I'm almost four months," she said moving his hand to her stomach. "You can't feel him or her move yet but there's a baby in there. Our baby."

"How far are you?" Roman asked.

"Two months almost three," she approached him standing in between his knees. "I just look bloated right now."

"And you," Jey asked nervously.

Apryl smiled putting a hand to her pretty much flat stomach. "Just hit two months."

"Are we ready for this? I mean these are babies." Roman asked. His voice shook with anxiousness.

"Whether we're ready or not they're coming, Roman. One quicker than the others," Kandice joked looking back at Trinity and Jimmy.

"Mama is gonna beat us. You can tell her Jimmy."

Jimmy sucked his teeth. "I'm not worried about her. I'm worried about Pops, he gon whoop our asses. And then he gon fuss and i don't wanna hear that shit, dog."

"Y'all are 21. Are y'all really that scared? He's not gonna whoop y'all," Trinity laughed.

"Nah, nah," Roman shook his head, "You're sayin that cause you don't know. He is gonna beat them."

"Oh, please." Kandice laughed. "You're scared too I take it."

"For them, yeah. I'm just tryna figure out what to do with a baby. Never had one."

"I should hope not, Roman. None of us have either, we'll get through it together."

Apryl folded her arms across her chest. "All I know is, these babies are coming whether y'all are ready or not so y'all better do whatever you need to do or I'm getting my knife."

With that threat, all three women walked out of the living room to the back room slamming the door behind them. The men sat quietly, staring straight ahead until sniffed filled the room. Roman and Jimmy stated at Jey in confusion. Jimmy sucked his teeth. "I know you ain't cryin, Uce."

"Shut up," he fussed wiping his eyes. "I'm emotional, shit. I'm having a baby, mane. This is serious."

"But is it serious enough to cry?" Jimmy asked laughing.

"Fuck y'all, I'm happy."

"I'm happy too but my apartment is too small for a baby." Roman sighed.

"Bruh," Jey laughed through his tears. "A baby ain't that damn big. He'll be cool." Jimmy sat quietly, his mind moving a mile a minute. "You alright over there, big bro?"

"What are we gonna do with babies? Shit, they take care of us most of the time. And they want us to be responsible for lil tiny ass humans."

"It'll all work out, Uce. But right now we gotta fix what we just did," Roman said standing from his seat.

--- Present Day ---

"Did y'all really bring cribs home, Pop?" Koda asked laughing.

"That and a bunch of other shit," Apryl laughed. "Cribs, play pens, tubs, bottles, clothes. Our lil ass living room was filled with shit from y'all daddies."

"But had we known what we know now," Trinity chuckled. "None of y'all would be here."

"What? Mama you told me I was your pride and joy. The best thing that ever happened to you." Eli said scrunching his face.

"Did I?" Trinity asked still laughing. "Must've been drunk or sleepy."

[whattheabcxyz]

2023-04-15

Singapore

Recent hazy conditions caused by hotspots in Kalimantan, Sumatra & Malaysia - fires probably sparked by recent hot weather

Local farm festival on @ Gillman Barracks

Society

Cash App founder Bob Lee apparently murdered over relationship with Iranian killer’s sister - never mess with Iranian men because they are f**king unhinged (thanks to their culture & religion), & I speak from personal experience!!!

Chroming is today’s glue-sniffing - people will just find another substance to get high on

Decomposing body of woman found in suitcase at Johor bus stop

Health

Deadly bacteria in eyedrops may spread from person to person

Malaysia also experiencing new COVID-19 wave

Transport

Singapore: Grab to raise platform fee by 40¢ next month

Fashion

^ Ikea socks have no identifiably unique Ikea feature at all - What do sharks have to do with Ikea?! & those are just about the ugliest armchairs I’ve ever seen!

Politics

Kishida evacuated after bomb goes off at site of planned public speech - 24-year-old suspect arrested

[rigginsstreet]

this got SUPER long so its going under the cut but this is the f*lice rant i was talking about lmao enjoy! (full disclosure i also end up going on a fredsythe rant because i gotta, ok. yall gonna make me sit through this stupid ass storyline when a better one is RIGHT FUCKING THERE so yeah, im mad. fp jones also likes men get over it.)

Sorry but there's literally nothing new inventive shocking or compelling about a storyline where two grown ass straight MARRIED adults are pining over each other because they had some weird romantic connection nearly 30 fucking years ago that may or may not have resulted in a fucking teenage pregnancy that im sure NOBODY wanted like yall really out here wanting me to believe what? alice cheated on her boyfriend and got knocked up by a dude who represented everything she was trying to get away from? and she told hal the kid was fps but never told fp himself? because that makes all of ZERO FUCKING SENSE! even if they wanted to throw out “well alice and hal were broken up at the time” its still SO out of character for alice like i know she had her wild child serpent days but its not something she looks back on with fondness so why the HELL does anyone think its a good idea to set her up with the fucking LEADER of the entire GANG are you all sniffing glue?? and then theyre trying to sit here and vilify hal so that we root for alice to hook up with fp in present day? the fuck outta here im not about to sit and cheer on alice’s character regression. first of all yall need to stop getting mad at 17 year old hal for not wanting to be a father and handling this situation poorly he was a TEENAGE BOY i know yall think everyone needs to be pristine angels from birth but thats not how life works and second of all he has every right to be sketched out that his daughter brought forth her long lost brother to fill in the void polly left, especially when the first time hal sees chic hes fucking BLEEDING after being attacked for god knows what reason in hals mind like... im team hal on this one he’s the only one with some self preservation alice and betty about to get themselves killed i s2g all these dumb ass decisions are being made, which in itself is bad enough, but to make it so obvious that this is all being done to eventually prop up a ship that is the very definition of fan service, is beyond ridiculous and terrible writing. like i get it. madchen and skeet are hot and have chemistry (which...btw....literally all the parents have insane chemistry with each other but no focus on the boring obvious straight pairing i guess but oh do not worry i have more to say on that later) i get it. but what is the purpose of that if you cant write an interesting story? and dont get me started on how shoehorned this recent ~connection~ is like yes i admit in s1 i got vibes from them (which, stay on this blog for 5 minutes and you will soon realize i can romantically/sexually connect pretty much any pairing amongst the parents because, like i said, they all have insane chemistry and they all say weird shit to each other). but i cannot believe yall sat here and thought the whole sexual frustration comment after fp got out of prison or the “leave him” exchange felt authentic??? like is it me? am i the one in the twilight zone? somebody help me out here. alice and fp in s1 couldnt stand each other and now shes all joking about his sex life ?? fp almost started a huge fight during that dinner with her and hal and the kids and yet im supposed to believe he’s been pining after her all these years?? like maybe id have an easier time believing this shit if i hadnt seen how he interacts with fred (oh yes. we’re going there because im tired of this HETERO NONSENSE GOING ON ALL THE TIME IN TELEVISION WHEN THEYVE LITERALLY SET UP BETTER OPPORTUNITIES FOR SAME SEX RELATIONSHIPS IM IN A MOOD SO WE’RE GOING ALL OUT) but to close off this part of my rant (oh and i didnt even touch upon how gross itd be for betty and jughead to share a sibling lmfao but that should be self explanatory): there is literally no conceivable way for this shit to go down and not make me lose respect for alice (fp i can give a slight pass to on the front of he and his wife being separate, but even then if he goes after alice while she’s still with hal....you done fucked up). first of all, going after your daughters boyfriends/ex boyfriends father is weird. second of all, if chic is in fact hals son, then they need to work on bringing the family together. hal is not a lost cause. chic is creepy as hell if anything i can see him pulling some shit that brings betty hal and alice closer together but no that makes too much sense so the writers probably wont do that! so theyre either gonna continue to push hal out so that itll be “acceptable” for alice to run to fp, or hal has to literally just fucking die and then what? alice goes to fp in her time of grief? im gonna throw up. 

and now on to the gay shit

im supposed to compare f*lice and fredsythe scenes and come out thinking alice was the one he was in love with? bitch WHERE? fp has a sordid past with both alice and fred for different reasons. we dont know the full extent of what happened with alice (if anything but for the sake of predictability that i know to expect from a cw show, lets say they do) but given how they interact with each other we can assume it was bad. and we all know fred and fps history and how dark that got for fp (like i literally wrote up a whole thing about it if you want a link i’ll send it to you) and yet no matter the past, fp had probably his most lightest moment of the show with fred. he was willing to drop everything and help fred and soon as he asked (which, btw, fred didnt even ask for help. fp knew he was in trouble and that was it. thats all he needed and he was there for fred). THAT is love, ok. THAT is a relationship worth delving into beyond 2 friggen episodes in season 1. And yes this same storyline thats been given to f*lice with this whole adultery nonsense, but with fp and Fred, would actually be interesting because two gay kids in the early 90s actually have a valid reason for not being together and not ending up together. and then you add on that fps from the south side and fred the north, and that makes things even more complicated for them because then you can have a whole scenario of fp thinking hes not good enough for fred and ending things because of his own insecurities, his way of trying to push fred towards a better life... like THAT makes sense. even if fred and fp were never a thing and you just went with fp being in love with his best friend all these years and he could never have him (which still makes sense because i mean come on, freds casanova ways in high school with the ladies? fp sitting on the sidelines trying to be a supportive best friend but dying on the inside, never telling fred how he feels?) not to mention like half the serpents are gay as hell and there would be such a great story to tell for why all these gay south side kids end up in the same gang under fps wing, because he’s making up for his own shitty upbringing, he wants these kids to know someones looking out for them like...if the writers need plots and backstory I can give you them for free it really didn't take a lot of brainpower but no by all means tell me how the two ~straight~ kids who grew up on the same side of town under virtually the same circumstances, one of whom wanted NOTHING MORE THAN TO SHED HER SERPENT IMAGE AND CREATE A BETTER LIFE FOR HERSELF, and the other who keeps going on about wanting to put his family back together, had such a tragic backstory and its not just a blatant midlife crisis on both their ends. please. by all means. enlighten me. 😒

[dc-x-readers]

Smiley (Raven x Reader)

Request: Hi I'd like to request a Raven imagine please. The reader trying to become friends with her always acting in a funny way to cheer her up. Later on Raven witnessing that it's just a front the reader puts on in order to not worry the Titans. Fluff please? :)

My First Request, I hope I did what you wanted!

"Here's the plan, Beast Boy and Cyborg go in first as a distraction, Starfire provide aerial. Raven and Smiley you two need to sneak in around back with me. I am going to disable the gun, but I will need you two to deflect the shots while I'm doing it." Robin said his voice thick with authority  even in the dire situation you couldn't help but grin at Robin's nickname for you, Smiley. It fit.

Everyone nodded at once, the plan was solid, as were all of Robin's plans. A series of movie parts that worked together in harmony. In other words, the Teen Titans. Beast Boy and Cyborg glanced at each other in a silent competition before the green skinned boy shifted into an elephant and began to charge, Cyborg not far behind yelling at battle cry. Starfire noticed the noise and quickly joined in, taking off into flight, her fists glowing green with starbolts. The remainder of your team did not stay to watch the mayhem, but you did take a moment to roll your eyes at your teammates recklessness. This was your life, your team, your family. You wouldn't have it any other way, expect for the ice cold fear that would trickle down your spine before a fight. You were different from the others, you didn't rush into battle whole heartedly like Beast Boy, Cyborg, and Star. Neither did you approach it in a calm calculated manor like Robin and Raven. Instead you froze before a fight steeling yourself for what was to come. But  you fought with your family, because they needed you. They needed you in battle just as much as they need you at home. You are the glue which holds the Titans together and honestly it was exhausting. Being at home was easy, partly because of your abilities, you are an empath, able to feel the emotions of others. You were always there when someone felt down in the tower, and you could feel them lighten with happiness. For Starfire, the mall is the best place to go, you take her shopping and teach her of Earth Culture. She loves to feel apart of your world, but sometimes she misses her home, and the two pf you spend hours talking of her planet. Or with Beast Boy who is as easy to cheer up as a puppy, simply making him a smiley face pancake satisfies. With Cyborg it is a little harder to cheer up, but you have found the football and a long rant session is the best remedy. For Robin you spar, let him take out all of his pent up rage on you before he is ready to talk. Raven is the hardest, she is so guarded, that you simply give her a cup of warm tea and sit near her, not prying, bur showing she's not alone. But every gift has a curse, your manifests itself while in a fight you can feel your enemies anguish, and it hurts more than any physical blow. Sometimes you want to fall down and cry in the middle of a battle, but know it would only risk those you love. Raven and you flanked the giant gun as Robin started to disable it. The battle was especially hard because everyone was an innocent under mind control. When they awoke there fear and confusion flooded trough you in hard waves. "How we looking?" Robin yelled to the two of you as a mind controlled zombie flew to the ground next to him. "Really good. We look like we aren't even trying. Or like we are and it's just effortless." You answered with your trade mark smile. You could hear soft laughter over comms and knew you did your job. The fight went smoothly, because it always did with Robin as the leader. Your powers acted up only a few times. You were so relieved when the last mind controlled citizens dropped to the ground you almost started to sing. Beast Boy ran up to you, post-fight exhilaration in his eyes and his smile. "We won!" The green skinned boy whooped. You too let out a whoop in happiness at the news. You were ready to get back home. "Who volunteers to carry the most beautiful dashing girl all the way home?" You asked in a joking tone. Only you and Robin were unable to fly so the rest of the team had to take turns carrying the two of you. "I'll do it." Raven sighed, finally pulling back her deep purple hood, letting her hair fall free. "Oh silly," you started in a sickly sweet tone, "you can't carry yourself home." Raven didn't seem affected by your words, but you could feel the barest flutter of warmth in her emotions. The happiness you gave Raven made you smile. Raven held out her arms for you, waiting for you to crawl into her in an embrace. You loved it when Raven flew you around, because she would hug you close, and her sent of old books and vanilla candle overwhelmed you senses in the best way possible. Raven mumbled her incantation into your hair, and suddenly you were surrounded by an inky black orb. You closed you eyes, not that it had much effect, as the outside seemed just as dark as your mind in the moment. The Tower was silent, when the two of you arrived. It probably meant the others went out for pizza, and you couldn't be happier in that moment. You needed some time alone. "I'm going to take a nap." You explained to Raven, awkwardly pointing behind you towards your room. You could still feel the hurt confusion of the brain washed victims with through your powers and you needed a good cry. Your hand shook and there was a slight tremble in your voice. You hoped Raven didn't notice. She did, of course she did. Raven grabbed you arm gently before you could make a break for it. Violet eyes bore into your own, "Y/N are you alright?" Her caring tone is what got to you, and you let the tears fall, "I was never supposed to be a warrior. I can't keep doing this. Feeling the villain's pain and fighting anyway. It hurts so much." "What?" Raven asked not understanding your outburst, but you didn't stop. "I am nothing like the rest of you. You are all so strong and good at fighting, and I'm worried one day I am going to end up hurting you all. I am just a human girl who can feel emotions, I am not enhanced with machines or and alien or even trained by one of the most powerful men in the world. I am just me. I am just so tired." You finished. Tears streaming down your cheeks you couldn't even see Raven who still held you arm. Raven didn't say anything for a minute, just pulled you into a tight hug. You sighed into the embrace feeling a bit better. "You know, you don't need to fight to be a part of our team, our family." Raven said, her voice soft in your hair. You sniffed, tears still in your eyes, "I want to help." "And you do help. Every day. Honestly I don't think we would function without you." Raven kissed the top of you head before leading you to your bed. She tucked you in gently, brushing the hair out of your face as you lay silent, "sleep for now. We will talk about it later." It wasn't what you were expecting, but it was a start.