#plsease being them back

[wewantedvenom]

please , god p bring them back to me please ! pleak

[kneel-begyourpardon]

Tales Of Glory {4/7}

pairing: Loki x reader

Summary: Loki caught you trespassing the land when it is forbidden. If anyone finds a person is on the land without the permission of the king, they must inform the guards and the person will be executed on the border. However, Loki has different plans for you.

Warnings: All nine realms are on the same planet and they are just lands. There is no magic, they are just normal humans living in the past (somewhere between 1400 to 1600) the chapters will contain violence (i mean a lot of violence), sexist people, a cocktail of angst, a dush of fluff, a lot of crying, implied smut, and I don’t want to spoil it but harming innocent things? be warned my people, be warned.

A/N: if I forgot to tag you plsease send me an ask. Thank you!! hope you enjoy!

edited by lovely @hoens-beta.

Masterlist

You got used to living in the castle. The servants were friendly, and helped each other out, especially the personal ones. There wasn't a lot of you, as most of the servants belonged the Thor, some for the cousins, and you, Loki’s single, personal servant. The first day you came back from Loki's room everyone wanted to know how the night went and what he was like, and you gave them your honest answer. He was gentle and caring. Some were surprised, and others warned you not to get used to it. Not to fall in love. You were there to please him temporarily, when he would find his queen he would forget about you or be with you secretly, like Odin. But they also said that the queen Frigga knew everything. 

Of course, not everyone was nice. Some didn't like you because you were from Earth, others were just mean to you for being Loki's 'chosen one'. Everyone had their different reasons. 

You soon found out that men weren't any different here than on earth. You still avoided them, realizing that they had no respect towards you. However, you were surprised that they let women be warriors. The first time you met Lady Sif you were pleasantly surprised. Knowing that she fought side by side with Thor made you think that she would be as mean as him towards you but when one of the guards got too handsy with you she quickly made him regret his decision. Back then you asked her why she helped you, after all, you were from the Midgard. She looked at you with a stern face, but her voice was soft.

"We are women; if we don't stand by each other who will? Men? Don't make me laugh. They want us broken, they want us below them. The ones who aren't afraid of us respect us, the ones who don't are intimidated by our power. You may be from Midgard but you're still one of us. First, they will assault you, next day me. I would rather stop them from the beginning before they get too confident."

That was the day when you felt proud of being a woman. You realized why Sif was a warrior. She wasn't just killing people or hunting things, she wanted to show others that she could to fight because she was a fighter by heart. The respect you felt after that towards the woman was unbelievable. 

As the days went by you and Loki grew closer. You would spend at least five days a week in his chamber. Every night if he had time to sleep, he would send a guard asking you to join him for the night. Of course, you never declined the offer. You liked being with him, and even wished to be able to spend a day with him. Nights with Loki included a lot of talking and reading. Mostly he reading to you aloud while your head rested in his lap. It's been two months since you have been in Asgard but you haven't done anything more than cuddling. At first, Loki wanted to know all about you. He asked questions about life on earth, the family you grew up in, your childhood. He wanted to know it all. Soon you started sharing stories about your past, laughing when he told you stories of him messing with Thor when they were smaller. He could listen to your laughter forever and never get bored of it, whilst you loved it when he read to you. His soothing voice was like lullaby while his long fingers gently stroke your hair. Sometimes you would fall asleep but he would never get mad at you. He'd simply kiss your forehead and tuck you under the covers. 

Today was a little different. The guard came to take you to Loki but soon after he was called away. He didn't leave before making sure you would get to the chambers safely on your own. The prince chose the guard especially for you, considering that certain guard was respectful towards you, even kind, and offered his help if needed. You quickly reassured him, and your ways parted, leaving you in the long, dimly lit hallway. Your footsteps echoed in the halls as you made your way to Loki's room. The excitement was clear on your face as you couldn't help but smile the whole way, your stomach filled with butterflies. The corridors were empty to your surprise as you haven't been greeted by anyone. Before you could make a final turn you were grabbed by your hand. Your eyes widened as the stranger pulled you back, slamming you into the wall making your head spin. Before you could make a sound he covered your mouth with his hand, harshly pressing on it. The face came into view and you were met by unfamiliar blue eyes. His brown hair fell into his eyes. The smile he was wearing was disturbing and his eyes shone dangerously. You shouted in his hand making him push it down harder.

"Shut it," he hissed, pressing his body closer to yours. "Now show me what you've got that made Loki crazy about you."

You couldn't even register his words. You could only focus on his hands on your waist trying to pull the dress off. He was trying to be quick but the dress had too many layers for him to take it off. He growled as he got a knife out, cutting your dress up your leg. 

Rage then replaced the fear in your heart. You were not going to be touched by some creep in the hallway. As his hand moved under your dress, you bit down on the one that was pressing down on your mouth, tasting his blood. He grunted, stepping back, holding his injured hand with the other. You turned around and began running. You almost made it to Loki's chambers when the man grabbed you from behind. Trying to free yourself, you pulled away, but his grip on you was tight. You once again tried getting away from him only for part of the dress to rip off making you fall flat on your face. The impact made a yell in pain as your forehead made contact with the cold floor. You felt your head spin, and you had no power to properly fight back when you were turned around. The man straddled you, but you were still able to scratch his face while trying to push him away. A scream left your lips as he grabbed your hand tightly, twisting it. You tilted your head back, tears filling your eyes. Your vision was blurry but you could make out the door of the room. Crying out you tried to free your hand by hitting the man with the other one. He easily caught it pinning both of them on sides while his mouth came down on your neck. You couldn't breathe anymore. Your head was hurting, and your heart was hammering in your chest. ready to explode. Tears slide down your temples wetting your hair. You once again tilted your head back, unconsciously giving the man better access. He smirked on your skin thinking you were enjoying it. But you hated it and wanted it to stop. 

Your eyes landed on the door far away as you opened your mouth and screamed for Loki. His name left your lips over and over again. You hoped the whole castle could hear you. As the man realized what you were doing, he covered your mouth. His hand came down on your face hard. Your head snapped in the other direction. You could taste your own blood. He was about to slap you again when you heard loud steps and yelling. 

Suddenly the man was ripped off of you. As he was pushed against the wall, green leather came into your view. There was a sound of a punch and a groan. You rolled on your side facing away from the scene. You pulled your knees up to your chest and clasped your hands together. You heard more footsteps coming towards you, but you couldn't move. All you did was silently cry, holding yourself. A touch made you flinch as familiar cold fingers take gentle hold of your arm. Turning you around, you were met with Loki's beautiful eyes, anger replaced by fear and worry.

"Are you okay?" he questioned as his eyes searched your entire body, looking for a wound. His breath got caught in his throat when he saw blood and hand marks all over your fragile skin. His jaw locked at the ripped dress. You inched closer to his kneeling form, tears still streaming down your cheeks. All you wanted to do was cry while he held you. Now that he was here you felt safe knowing that he wouldn't let anyone touch you in any sort of way. 

Loki put one hand around your back, whilst another went under your knees. He stood up, picking you up with ease. Cold leather felt amazing on your burning cheek, so you pressed your face to his chest, hissing when the gash on your forehead stung at the contact. Loki kissed your head, whispering soothing things to you as he went through the doors. He sat on the bed with you on his lap and wrapped his hands around your shoulder tightly. 

"I'm so sorry, love," he whispered, putting his hand on your cheek. The coldness of his hand soothed your injured skin. His thumb wiped the salty tears away. He tucked your head in the crook of his neck. "My brave little girl. My incredible, brave girl." He kissed your forehead over and over again, praising you. He gently rocked you back and forth, one of his hands holding you against his chest while the other rubbed soothing circles on your shoulder. 

As your sobs came to a halt, and when your tears ran dry and your hiccups finally stopped, you drifted off to sleep. In Loki's arms, you felt safe, you almost felt like you were back home, in bed with your sister, laughing and dreaming about your princes in shining armor. But you didn't need golden armors and white horses. All you needed was a man in green armor roaming the forest.

You fell asleep knowing that all would be okay because your gorgeous, raven-haired prince would take care of everything.

Tags:  @ginamarie1512​​ @darkforestbl0g @alina-barnes​ @pandacookieowo @dark-night-sky-99​ @jessiejunebug​​ @hellethil @percyjackson886​​ @lilithqueenofhell​​ @bionic-otp​​ @timetraveler1978​​​ @skulliebythesea​​ @ha-tep

[bigbrothernetflix-st]

EPISODE THREE

“this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off!” - nash

HOH: Nash UPSIDE DOWN: Joey & Saira NOMINEES: Brianna & Gina POV: Jacob FINAL NOMINEES: Emma & Gina EVICTED: Gina (11-1), Jake (WALK)

ARIA

https://youtu.be/SyHPQkbxxw8

JOEY

WATCH THIS AGE LIKE MILK:

I feel great!!!!! Nash winning means my ass aint going up, I gave her 2 tokens, and she gave me 1, and I feel fantastic heading into this week

SAIRA

i feel okay about nash being hoh, she wasn't my first choice but i don't think im in any danger of being nominated (hopefully haha) im not sure who i WOULD want to be nominated, i just know who i wouldn't want, so as long as they're okay i'm good!

JEV

I'm once again feeling pretty good this week. I've grown pretty close to Nash since nominating her in week 1 and she told me and Nathan we aren't going up so, there's that! She's told me Gina is going up and will be her target which I'm not thrilled about but hopefully Gina can pull some miracle and win POV. I'm a little worried about Emma and Jake too, as they've both said they haven't spoken to her much which is dumb, bc like hello??? its week 3, i feel esp with Jake, I can understand Emma bc Nash keeps leaving her on read but I don't think Jake has even tried much (crying emoji) So hopefully they can ALSO pull something out

JAKE

FUCK MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hate everyone in this game t b h. why can't people just follow with a plan and go through with it like it aint that hard to put your chips on one person from your alliance so youre all safe like........ i dont think these ppl understand strategy and it's TIRING. i frankly am over people relying on their friendships to get themselves through another week bc fucking nash won an alliance-based hoh comp. now we have to deal w this fucking friend group running the house another week. i don't know if i'm safe i'm honestly probably going to be put up??? even tho nash is the one that CONSTANTLY ignores my PMs even tho ive given her paragraphs to respond to... she's gonna do whatever her little friends want her to do. i mean that's what she literally said to me. i was like pls don't nom me <3 and she was like "im not making any promises im just doing whatever the house wants me to do" like girl............ lkjghklsdfjhg what kind of dumbass bullshit response was that. just tell me you're putting me up or you're not. youre a big girl you can make your own fucking decisions.

i give nash what i would give any hoh if they won and that is "i'd never ever nominate you it's never even crossed my mind" and hoping that's enough to make her wanna keep me. she might think im not going after her but, if she's smart, she'll send me out the door this week before i can retaliate. 

im super super worried that jacob will be like oh jev n jake aligned in BBHOS9 u should put them up together since jev nominated you week 1. like i feel like she'd do ANYTHING jacob tells her at this point cuz shes just another one of his sheep so like hoping im good w jacob but he's such a wildcard idfk

at this point im just hoping me or emma don't get put up and if we do there will be a veto to be won and a nash/jacob to come after next so...... period

ARIA

yall i feel so fucking cracked and tired of everything but itS FINE!!! I got this easy peasy!! Im not going to always feel motivated but im doing my best and thats valid baby!!! So lets jump in, first off lets start with a random information dump of things i've collected

-jacob has talked about me w/ nicholas during pasio

-monty and jacob have a connection ( i dont even remember how)

-nathan nash (maybe jacob) obviously tight lmao

-joey monty close

-Jake made a counter alliance to Jacob's (actually joshes) alliance made of me gina saira emma and josh

-josh emma me alliance

-JOEY RECORDS CALLS

-Jake is wary of nathan (but also thinks hes cute ugh)

-told jake im wary of pasio peeps so he might nom them

-Jacob alliance STILL isnt created

-called with josh and told him that jacob is wary that the alliance isnt made yet

-jacob josh have a pregame

-told josh, saira and nick have a pregame

-josh kiki close

-josh thinks saira is a social threat 

-josh prefers jev over nathan

-told monty to talk to jake more

-told joshua jacob is the most connected person

-got back to nash gina doesnt like her

-jacob kiki nash confirmed trio alliance

-nash told jev gina is the target (jev then told jake)

-josh thought jacob was the original maker of the alliance

-jake thinks jacob/josh are snakes

-jake also thinks jacob-josh-nash-kiki-bri-nick-nathan are an alliance

-josh wants to play the middle w/ me :uwu:

 So from here I want to get into how my ideal week will go and how it will realistically go. IDEALLY Nash noms jev and josh with them not winning veto and the house gets rid of a utr social threat but realistically its gonne be gina and jake with gina going bc she doesnt talk to anyone of have any motivation for this game (I LITERALLY WROTE HER A PARAGRAPH TO SEND TO NASH TO NOT BE NOMINATED AND SHE GOES "hmm idk maybe ill send it" LIKE????) 

Okay the other thing im freaking out about is bc i feel like theres tension between me Jacob Josh and Jake and im not sure what it is about. I mean i kinda do but im missing key components. The whole situation just doesn't sit right with me at all and I feel very at odds with them in a weird kinda way. I've explained this so many times but i have such a bad feeling that josh leaked the janelle alliance to jacob and is more with him than me and now josh is setting these two sides against each other and i just heard from him that nash isnt nomming him so now im really uncomfy ughhhh i have such a bad feeling and i really need to work on people like jev saira monty to make sure i have people behind me i can fall back on, but also im getting the vibe jake really really trusts me which is great because i want to go far with him as well, unless hes just misting me SUPER hard ughhh

god i just have such a bad feeling about this week buts its fINE totally fine ill work it out eventually,,,but now its trust ranking time yay

1.Gina (youre so inactive i adore you!)

2.Joshua (kid GANG!!! thank you for trusting me sometimes <3)

3.Jake (hes a crackhead but hes my crackhead)

VERY BIG GAP

4.Emma (shes chilling what a lovely gal)

5.Monty (better inactive than be active and a threat)

6.Nathan (youre kinda sketchy but hes like a funky older brother)

7.Josh (youre at the center of a balancing act i wonder if u can keep it up)

8.Nick (they always give such an honest vibe,,,,,i dont trust it)

9.Brianna (shes so sweet but the sweetest angels make the fiercest demons)

10.Jev(,,,,your on slightly thicker ice than joey but combined with a little more charisma)

ANOTHER GAP WOOT WOOT

11.Joey (youre on THIN fucking ice buddy,,,,please be more open w/ me)

12.Saira (im begging for u to talk game to me,,, but also since we havent talked u cant snake me yet)

13. Jacob (idk ily sm but youre so fcking connected and idk if i reached ur inner circle yet)

14. Kiki (my favorite furry)

15.Nash (please talk to me im begging ill do anything please plsease plaease plae-)

So update ive been talking around and wow this game loves looking at my allies and kicking them in the kneecaps while spitting in their eyes ugh. So nash is probably leaning towards nomming jake and Gina with gina as the target (really weird that jake is nommed makes me think jacob had some influence there) but in that scenario best case is that veto is used and anyone but josh goes up and that person leaves easy fucking peasy!! Anyway i just talked with josh and apparently jacob was the one who came up with the alliance idea which is interesting bc he tried to pin it on josh. Anyways not to totally contradict my initial rant but me and josh had a really good chat where we're kinda in the same position between two groups (the og alliance and janelle) and we dont know if we should make the og alliance and with who bc of janelle so we're struggling to see whats the correct move from here....or maybe josh is completely misting me but i fucking hope not ugh- either way im surviving this week and thats that!!

JEV

I'm realising that I'm getting myself into a pretty tight position since I have firm alliances with Emma & Jake and Nash & Nathan, as well as being extremely close to Josh C, which could prove difficult for me down the line, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

KIKI

https://youtu.be/6cn8xUFWqhA

BRIANNA

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1XvZzg3dTEZ89VeFbG3bxk4JFNtr7Ixm0/view?usp=sharing 

i had to use google drive bc it wouldn't take my file on youtube :((((

JEV

So right now I've somehow accidentally wriggled my way into conspiring with Nash on how best to take Gina out, which is so dumb of me because I don't really want to see Gina leave this week, but at the same time I'm having to fight Nash's decision because she wants to put Emma up beside her and... I can't let that happen because I'm worried Emma would leave over Gina

JEV

So I'm speaking to Nash, taking the heat off of Emma by telling her I feel she could be a number for me/her/Nathan down the line, and now I'm pushing for Brianna to go up since Nash wants someone who 100% wouldn't leave over Gina and I'm thinking like... WHO would vote to evict Brianna, but at the same time I'm feeling super terrible about it because Brianna is a literal angel

JEV

Wow a lot going on so I'm trying to update as best I can, Nash is saying she's going to randomise for who goes to the upside down so I'm having to encourage her not to include me or Nathan in the randomisation just incase she needs us for strategising but REALLY its so I can stay and hang around and try my best to keep Emma from touching the block at all this week.

NASH

sorry for nominating women i didnt mean it.

EMMA

If i am being honest the more this game goes by i get so unmotivated and its only week 3 i suck because well in bbgames like galar and almia i mostly played from the bottom now im like alright i kinda want to fuck up my game for fun but kinda pisses me off a bit that i almost could of been nominated if it wasnt for jev but that pisses me off so much i tried talking to nash but i get left on read i dont take things 100x personal unless if somebody is being mean like laughing etc but knowing that i would be on the block over brianna when i did try talking to nash its still hurts a little but if somebody like gina wins veto if i get on the block it issss what it isss i guess but i played on the bottom way to many times maybe i can do this??

JEV

So my efforts worked and Brianna went up instead of Emma, now I've just gotta hope neither of the noms win POV/that the POV isn't used so I don't have to throw someone elses name out there to Nash :flushed:

JOSH

hello ladies and gays. straights aren't welcome here.

today, we are feeling GOOD because the person we nominated just a few days ago won power and STILL didn't nominate me. is that iconnery or what? i was honestly ready for my ass to be TOAST but i did approach nash before they won HOH and had a conversation about where we stood and they said i would be OKAY this week bc we did start talking. we love to see it, yes we do!

the nominees this week are gina and brianna and.. even though i'm in two different alliances with both of them, i'm not mad at either of them going up. i don't REALLY talk with either and i'd be happy to see either one of them go. the tricky part will be figuring out WHO to vote when the time comes, but we have a POV to happen before we get there. we'll SEE.

if i had to choose, i'd probably send brianna home simply because i find her a bit CHAOTIC where i feel like gina isn't really going to cause a lot of waves with me. she's much more quiet whereas brianna is more likely to be able to pick herself back up.

some other fun events going on:

jake was NOT happy about nash winning and thought he was going to get nominated because of it. he was about to RIP nash a new one and is really brewing with how much he hates them. MAKES ME LAUGH A LIL BECAUSE IT WAS SO UNWARRANTED BUT NEVERTHELESS, it's something to note that jake does NOT like nash.

i think aria is my number one right now bc we get along really well and have very similar opinions. i'm really open with how i talk to her so i'm HOPING she's not spilling everything i say to someone else but i don't think she WOULD? i dunno. i love her energy and i'm hoping we can SLICE AND DICE together in the middle.

my strategy is to take my HOH under my belt and take a step back for a minute while my two alliances (one: jake, aria, gina, emma, saira, me & two: jacob, aria, brianna, kiki, me) get picked off back and forth. i'm going to see if i can craft a narrative for them to go after each other but we'll SEE. there are a lot of people in the middle i enjoy a lot more than some of the people in my alliances so IDK. i feel like some people got thrown into these alliances that i did NOT want but they were kind of forced in so i don't trust it. and i think people KNOW because i'm not very chatty abt it in the chats (and i haven't even made one of the chats. am i supposed to? idk)

anyways that's all for now x 

ARIA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zp71zzR-wgE

someone help

JAKE

https://voca.ro/g2ZQWs9x8du

JEV

Not miss Nash coming to me asking how I'd feel about being renom :flushed:

JEV

So I literally just woke up from a sleep and in the space of 30 minutes have had to talk Nash out of renomming me, Emma or Jake since we've just made an alliance together so I warned her that probably wouldn't work out for us in the long run. We narrowed it down and she shortlisted Aria, Josh C, Monty & Nick, and I have spun her to try and get her to nominate Aria, because 1. I don't wanna see Josh C go up and 2. like with Brianna I feel nobody here would vote to evict Aria, and Nash wants Gina GONE (crying emoji) so I feel this was the only logical renom to suggest.

JEV

The conversation has turned back to Emma and I just really don't wanna let that happen because I do feel like she'd leave over Gina. Part of me is saying not to stick my neck out too much to save Emma but at the same time she's my number 1 in this game and I hope she'd return the favour if she was in my position.

NASH

this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off! 

ARIA

Well,,,, FBSFJDF I feel like im making so many of these but honestly this game changes everyday so please dont be too annoyed by me uwu, the mood swing i had just this DAY was insane so lets begin w/ the general info-

IN TIME LINE ORDER

-Jev told jake that something about noms but acted dumb when I asked

-Gina/Joshua/Aria alliance created!!

-Saira and Josh are close

- VIDEO DR GOES HERE

-Jake spills Emma-Jev-Nathan-Nash-Jake alliance with Emma/Jev/Jake being a trio as well= Jev created the alliance

-Jev prefers gina out

-jake doesnt believe in screenshots or recording calls

-Jev and Jake are close

-Jev/Jacob/Jake all played together before

-I leaked Bri's backups to Jake as well as Jacob's trio with Nash and Kiki

-nash almost backdoored jev bc he wasnt responding to her

-jev was the reason i was almost otb

-I WAS ALMOST OTB

-Josh AND Jacob both want Jake out

-Bri thinks nash's comp ability is scary

-Nash and Nick are close 

-Jacob nervous about Bri's backup leaking

-Jacob barely talks w/ saira and monty

-made a final three w/ jacob josh called malibu

So now im debating whether its morally okay for me to analyze what happened in the living room in a game sense. FBSdffan So lets run down things in chronological order and I might mention my thoughts if they arent too controversial, Nathan leaks the alliance with jev/nash/jake/emma. Eventually emma says 'i wanna know who put these thoughts in the hohs head" and nick starts to shut the discussion down which is an interesting contrast to their earlier attitude where they were very for the drama continuing, which leads me to begin they had some sort of hand in it. Nathan goes on to say he likes nash on a personal lvl which jake analyzes as a nod to a friendgroup and a mini confrontation between nathan and jake occur. I believe that part was just a misunderstanding on both parties account. Then happy discussion until Jake calls nash out for being in the diary session for too long which leads to a discussion of house guests over analyzing production and using that as a strategy which is ultimately unfair and also at this time I believe nash was going through itTM leading to their friends to be slightly defensive on their behalf (which is valid) and i after rereading things i really hope that they're okay, ultimately this leads up to frustration on Jake's part and his ultimate quit. 

I mean where do i go from here? I have the Bri's angels but that did get leaked to Emma on Jake's way out so i need to figure some way to micromanage that where i think im gonna make a emma jev alliance and work with them as a trio in the future (if gina goes) but rn i feel like this force of energy that is Bri's backups is gonna body for a bit but i think theyre gonna throw hoh leading me jev or emma to step up and body a bit. Like i think i might actually win hoh and nom nash and monty with a nick potential renom bc im BORED and nash continuing to skate by without even talking to me is not valid, and monty is so not here its like??? HEWWO??? but idk thats making big moves i may just chill a bit for now but i dont want jev and emma being targeted in the future bc theyre gonna be numbers for me and thats on PEWIOD!

HOST WEEKLY CAST ASSESSMENT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L25lY813N1k&list=PLFEwPPy8j010XXwntq80VSU0qLNTNpSIN&index=4&t=0s

[noecat]

88 qn tag meme

thank u 2 the lovely @jiminieboi for tag!!

holy shit this was long,,listen i tag no one but my wife @wingjk bc im literally too lazy to breathe rn

the last:

1. DRINK: passionfruit red tea. it was too sweet i wish i’d gone w green but that’s too sour,,,,honestly a representation of my personality as a whole

2. PHONE CALL: school friend who was wondering where i was

3. TEXT MESSAGE: if messenger counts, @wingjk bc i was going to sleep

4. SONG YOU LISTENED TO: come back home by bts

5. THE TIME YOU CRIED: i don’t recall!! perhaps a couple weeks ago?

have you:

6. DATED SOMEONE TWICE: don’t call me out like this

7. KISSED SOMEONE AND REGRETTED IT: not really? i dont regret many things

8. BEEN CHEATED ON: ha

9. LOST SOMEONE SPECIAL: yes

10. BEEN DEPRESSED: listen

11. GOTTEN DRUNK AND THROWN UP: i don’t get drunk

top 3 favorite colors

12. black

13. pink

14. in your area

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. MADE NEW FRIENDS: yes and i love them

16. FALLEN OUT OF LOVE:  L I S T E N

17. LAUGHED UNTIL YOU CRIED: rarely, but yes!!

18. FOUND OUT SOMEONE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU: yall. assholes. love to gossip. and i love finding out about it so it’s a mutually beneficial thing

19. MET SOMEONE WHO CHANGED YOU: doesn’t everyone change me to some degree?? yes, though i do think a lot of the char dev ive undergone was internally motivated and not bc of a specific person,,,i just want to treat people better.

20. FOUND OUT WHO YOUR FRIENDS ARE: yes and i Love Them

21. KISSED SOMEONE ON YOUR FACEBOOK LIST: ppft no who the fuck even facebooks in the year 2k17,,,tho,, @wingjk​ hmu ;(

GENERAL

22. HOW MANY OF YOUR FACEBOOK FRIENDS DO YOU KNOW IN REAL LIFE: none

23. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS: a kitten !! listen he’s an asshole but i love him

24. DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR NAME: as in legally?? i wish!! hopefully soon

25. WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOU LAST BIRTHDAY: ha ha dont talk to me

26. WHAT TIME DID YOU WAKE UP: i overslept today bc my sleeping schedule is,,,,,very good,,,,,,,,,,,

27. WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT: readin fanfic rip

28. NAME SOMETHING YOU CAN’T WAIT FOR: hobi. wheres. ur. mixtape. where. also MY BDAY IS IN LESS THAN A MONTH !!! LOVE ME !!!!!!

29. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR MOM: uhm yesterday

30. WHAT IS ONE THING YOU WISH YOU COULD CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE: listen,

31. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW: the sweet sound of everyone being loud as fuc

32. HAVE YOU EVER TALKED TO A PERSON NAMED TOM: i dont think so ??

33. SOMETHING THAT IS GETTING ON YOUR NERVES: people breathing around me

lost questions

34. MOLE(S): ya

35. MARK(S): scars ?? i fell into a ditch once and i still have the scars from that,,also depression isnt ideal

36. CHILDHOOD DREAM: to be a lawyer

37. HAIR COLOR: brown but im gna bleach it someday

38. LONG OR SHORT HAIR:  short-ish

39. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMEONE: not romantically but i am currently interested in someone, yeees

40. WHAT DO YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF: sometimes the planets alighn just right and i say something quotable that im proud of

41. PIERCINGS: that havent healed completely already ? 2, in my ears

42. BLOODTYPE: red

43. NICKNAME(S): q, ‘that asshole’, kyu

44. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: not looking

45. ZODIAC: leo

46. PRONOUNS: im agender. i strongly prefer it/its for Reasons but some of yall fucks take offense bc ‘but u are not an object!!’ and like. listen. if u think that using ‘they/them’, which i do not want to be called, is somehow more respectful to my identity ???  ? ?  ? i dont rly have much to say. in spaces where people are less tolerant and presentation overrides id, i go by she/hers.

47. FAVOURITE TV SHOW: i dont watch them anymore but ill always have a special spot in my heart for hannibal and my earliest experiences w bbc sherlock (ahahah can u believe i used to be a sh blog tho)

48. TATTOOS: not yet!! i want to get mine right the first time

49. RIGHT OR LEFT HAND: technically ambidextrous but ive been using my right hand for so long (bc u dont rly realize how inconvenient literally everything is w left hand until u try it skdfjgfg) that it’s now my dominant one

50. SURGERY: yes, but minor

51. HAIR DYED A DIFFERENT COLOR: nop but ive shaved it all off once

52. SPORT: used to sail, used to kayak, now i possess no skills. i actually ish i did have a sport i play regularly, but, i am a Lazy Fuck,

53. VACATION: aksdjfd i dont rmbr !! i travelled a lot when i was young. now we just go to neighboring countries over breaks sometimes.

54. PAIR OF TRAINERS: not converse low, that’s 4 sure

MORE GENERAL

55. EATING: nothing, but hopefully about to

56. DRINKING: nothing, but hopefully about to

57. I’M ABOUT TO: eat, drink, go home

58. WAITING FOR: senpai to answer my anon ask. senpai pls. senpai im dying here i only get wifi sporadically for like 10 min at a time senpai plsease

59. WANT:  see hoseok irl someday, to not fail my year end exams, to have a good future after this. if we’re going wildly unrealistic, give me financial stability and the power to play piano proficiently.

60. GET MARRIED: honestly i think this would depend on where i am in life, where my partner(s) is/are in life, and what we want out of our relationship (plus, my generation supposedly killed marriage, so)

61. CAREER: listen i used to want to be a lawyer real bad before i grew up and realized im a fuckign depressed idiot who cant do shit so now im just hoping for some kind of stable job that i wont hate,,,,,,i lean towards the social sciences, and they’re what im best at, but my fucking dumb ass is currenly taking natural sciences instead because ????? no fuckin clue, past me, what the fuck,

62. HUGS OR KISSES: i dont like hugs much, so kisses. though i do like to cuddle ??? i think ??? theoretically ???? normally i just dont let ppl touch me

63. LIPS OR EYES: lips

64. SHORTER OR TALLER: couldn’t care less but theres smth hot abt someone being taller than me (unrelated news kuroo is 187cm holy shit fuck T O W E R O V E R M E)

65. OLDER OR YOUNGER: as in ?? romantically ?? to be friends with ?? if it’s the former, almost definitely older. for the latter, i prefer older, but personality matters more than age does.

66. NICE ARMS OR NICE STOMACH: dont care. tho if u have arms that could snap my neck, 

67. SENSITIVE OR LOUD: as in me ?? listen im both. im both. but if we’re talking partners, i imagine kuroo is plenty loud, so that,

68. HOOK UP OR RELATIONSHIP: listen i dont care as long as it’s enjoyable and mutually beneficial

69. TROUBLEMAKER OR HESITANT: hm

have your ever:

70. KISSED A STRANGER: nop

71. DRANK HARD LIQUOR: nop

72. LOST GLASSES/CONTACT LENSES: yes, but found them

73. TURNED SOMEONE DOWN: ya!!

74. SEX ON THE FIRST DATE: nop

75. BROKEN SOMEONE’S HEART: not intentionally ??

76. HAD YOUR HEART BROKEN: : l i s t e n

77. BEEN ARRESTED: nop im a good upstanding citizen

78. CRIED WHEN SOMEONE DIED: as in irl ?? i dont think so

79. FALLEN FOR A FRIEND: hm, no, i,

do you believe in:

80. YOURSELF:  ya im great. im a piece of shit but *insert trash can not trash cannot meme*

81. MIRACLES: nah

82. LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT: nah

83. SANTA CLAUS: nah. attraction, maybe

84. KISS ON THE FIRST DATE: do what u want !! 

85. ANGELS: @wingjk is one so i can confirm

86. CURRENT BEST FRIENDS NAME(S): van, iv, jess are u a best friend or am i reading u wrong, id say drea but she’s my soulmate, id say nastya but she’s my wife and will complain i friendzoned her

other

87. EYE COLOUR: greenish

88. FAVOURITE MOVIE: casino royale !!! also all the ghibli things were my childhood

[santinorps]

📱 for callakarth thnx

ur welc

Send me a “📱” and I will answer the following.

What was my muse’s 5 last sent texts yours?

to: john cornelius

I’m picking up a pizza on the way home, I don’t wanna cook tonight. Actually I’m gonna pick up, like, four pizzas on the way home so get your Man Appetite on, you’re gonna be eating for the next two hours. 

( sent, 6:07PM )

I’m out walking Peyton and Baz, and it’s just started POURING with rain. Can you bring the car? We’re drenched and miserable, we need a hot bath and a hot chocolate. 💔 (Well, I’ll have a hot chocolate, the dogs can have something that won’t kill them, like a treat). 

( sent, 3:16PM)

Have you noticed how domestic we’ve gotten? Neither of us are touring and we just spend our wintry days planning our next grocery shop and going for coffee and lazing around the house barefoot watching movies. We put the dishes away together and the other day I literally cleaned the toilet while you were showering. WE CHANGED THE BEDSHEETS TOGETHER. I vacuumed while you dusted the shelves? This has to stop. We need to do something wild. Like… uh. I don’t know. Take another roadtrip…? 

( sent, 8:43PM )

Too lazy for a roadtrip. But Pirates Of The Caribbean is about to start on TV if you wanna come watch with me? I’ll make tea.  

( sent, 8:45PM )

This is silly but I always forget to say thanks to you for always… being there? That’s cliche but I think you know what I mean. I hope you know what I mean. Thank-you for taking care of me. I just remembered but you’re not home right now so I’m texting it to you instead. Thank-you, John. I know I have my moments when I don’t seem very thankful but please remember that I am. And that I don’t mean to be bratty with you. It’s… it’s hard. But… I love that you’re here. In my house. Thank-you, forever. xxx

( sent, 11:56AM )

What was my muse’s 5 last unsent texts yours?

to: john cornelius

This is stupid. This is stupid, I know you’re gone from Baltimore so that you can write and make an album and do your job with your band but I also know all too well that it’s most often business mixed with pleasure and I’m fucking… I can’t unsee what I keep imagining. I need you to tell me, I need to know. Are you fucking anyone else? You have an absolutely ungodly amount of sex appeal even if you don’t see it or acknowledge it and I know how flattered you can get. Are there other guys? Girls? Did you think about sleeping with anyone else???

( DELETED )

i wish you were home. i wish you were home. i don’t wdant to caldl anybozdy else i doni’t want their help. im havming a bad night a realy babd night i know i isaid i was fine when we were on the phone earlier but im not and i found all the wine we still havre in the hosue andd i want to drink it all. i want sto drink all of it. i tried to pour it down the sink ut i cant seem to ? i ca.nt im pathicte. ni dont wanna drink it but i do. plaease come home. plsease.

( DELETED )

Honestly fuck this. I’m fucking sick of this. I want you to go home to Arizona. I’m sick of you being here, I’m sick of everyone. I don’t need anyone. There’s nothing fucking wrong with me and you need to just go home and let me deal with it. I was dealing with it before, why did you even come back? Go home. This isn’t your home. I’m not your home. 

( DELETED )

I’m having a really hard time, and I don’t think you know that. I mean… you know that, but I don’t think you really know just how hard. I’m better at hiding than I thought, I suppose. I’m waiting for it to hurt again. I’m waiting for it to hurt like before and it’s making it so hard to enjoy the fact that you’re here now. It goes away for a bit but then I’ll remember and it comes back and it terrifies me. I can’t do that again. I can’t. I’ll… I know I’ll die. If I do all that to myself again, I will die this time. I know that. And I don’t want you to know that I’m so dependent on you staying because I wouldn’t want to force you to if you, God forbid, didn’t want to any more. I’m not my own person any more and I hate that but I need you. I need you. I need alcohol. I need… I need coke and ecstasy and Adderall injections. But all I can have is you so all that need… has to go to you. Does that make sense? I don’t wanna die. 

( DELETED )

I’m going to be in love with you until the sun burns out, the moon crumbles, and all the stars fall from the sky. So, so in love with you. 

( DELETED )

What was my muse’s last Snapchat to yours?

What my muse saved your number as?

“John Cornelius” because that is how he full-names John when they are feelin’ frisky. 

What contact photo my muse has set for yours?

He likes to remind John that the mullet was a thing. 

What ringtone my muse has set for yours?

iPhone lyf so none but if he did, it would be The Maine’s cover of I Wanna Love You. 

How many times my muse has called your this week?

Alex calls John incessantly, especially when he doesn’t pick up, so probably like a hundred. 

How many calls has my muse missed from yours?

ALEX CALLS JOHN INCESSANTLY, ESPECIALLY WHEN HE DOESN’T PICK UP… so probably also about a hundred.