#plus because its smaller im reading much faster

[ohmarjorie]

Ok reading with music on is actually not that bad

[yurisolde]

under read more bc i put too much effort into my ocs and there is A Lot. tw for violent stuff

this will be updated every time i think of something for him!

deviantart link

Rollick

“The Ravenous” ? idk I suck at titles

no accessories

Size reference

why does he have anime hair if hes a fish? because he’s my oc and i say so

I MADE ICONS FOR THE LOCATIONS AND CLASS AND OTHER CHAMPIONS’ ABILITIES AND TUMBLR WONT’T LET ME ADD THEM WITHOUT FUCKING THE WHOLE POST UP

Short crappy bio

A young shark-like Vastaya. Born in Ionia, west of the island Sudaro. He was captured as a child by  Bilgewater pirates after straying too close to the surface and being found. Was then put to work on the Slaughter Docks, and trained to hunt in the traditional Serpent Isles manner: “launching themselves at their targets to secure tow-hooks with their bare hands, and beginning to butcher the creatures while they yet lived.”.

I need to update myself on League lore, but I would like him 2 be acquaintances with Nami and Fizz. Also, Rollick would have heard stories about Pyke and would find him really cool. Ideally, he would have Johnny Yong Bosch as his voice actor because I love how he voiced Kung Jin in Mortal Kombat X, but I don’t know how he’d do with a pirate accent lmao.

Kit

Would be classed as a Fighter with the sub-class Diver. At least I think he would.  

His kit is basically just a mash-up of multiple champions with extra ingredients. Riot do it themselves, so I'm allowed to, too. Pirate lingo used for most of his abilities and voice lines b/c I'm not creative for naming things.

 Passive "Blow the Man Down." : A mash-up of Rengar and Darius' but more complicated. Auto-attacking 3 times in a row, or using abilities, gives his unused abilities 3 different tiers of empowerment. (Like, if you auto-attack 3 times, use W, then Q, his E will have tier 3 empowerment.). Tiers 2 and 3 gives the target bleed when hit by abilities, applying "Blood in the Water."  Applying the bleed multiple times makes it stack, tier 2 stacks like two stacks of tier 1 bleed, tier 3 stacks like two stacks of tier 2 bleed. How many times can it stack? Idk. 5? 7? 10?? ok probably not 10 that would be stupid.

2nd passive "Clipper." : Rollick moves faster in the river; this move speed scales with his normal move speed.

Q "Feed the Fish." : Tier 1 is a swipe in an AOE cone with his claws. Tier 2 is a small lunge in a targeted direction with two swipes, one with each hand. Tier 3 is a longer distance lunge with a bite. If tier 3 lands on a moving target (examples: scuttlecrab when it dashes, Ezreal using his E), it will follow the target like Warwick Q/Evelynn E. The bite will also heal him for a small amount.

W "Hook, Line, Sinker." : is like Rengar's Bola Strike with a wider but shorter range for tiers 1 and 2, but he leaps in the targeted direction at tier 3 and if he hits something, covers it with his net and stays on top of them for a short amount of time. Tier 2 spins the target around from they way Rollick throws his net and will turn the opposite direction of the way the target was originally standing. If you're facing Rollick and the tier 2 net hits you, your back is now turned to Rollick.

E "Chase." : Warwick Blood Hunt but either less or more annoying. Cooldown is shorter in duration, but so is its active. The passive part of it only shows paths to champions affected with a bleed, burn or poison DOT effect. (Includes: Rollick's "Blood in the Water", Darius'  "Hemorrhage", Brand's  "Blaze", Gangplank's  "Trial by Fire", Lillia's  "Dream Dust", Cassiopeia's  "Noxious Poison" and  "Debilitating Poison", Twitch's "Deadly Venom", Teemo's  "Toxic Shot" and  "Noxious Trap", Singed's  "Poison Trail", the  "Scorch" rune,  "Ignite" summoner spell,  "Challenging Smite" summoner spell, "Azakana Gaze" from  Demonic Embrace, and "Torment" from  Liandry's Anguish.

R "Cleave 'Em to the Brisket!" : Similar to Skarner's "Impale". Rollick takes the hooked blade he has on his belt and lunges at the target, stabbing into the enemy champion's chest with his chest to their back, and drags them away. "Cleave 'Em to the Brisket!" can only be used on a champion that has their back turned towards Rollick. It applies a tier 3 "Blood in the Water." upon use. It can yank champions out of  Displacement Immunity, but doesn't suppress the target champion entirely, they are still able to use dash and blink abilities, use Thresh's  "Dark Passage", recast  "Death Sentence" , and use most movement summoner spells ( Flash, Hexflash, Mark/Dash), but if they do, half of their current HP is taken away from the hooked knife being dragged/yanked out of them. If you are 30% HP and you use one of the movement abilities mentioned, you will leave with 15% HP and two stacks of tier 3 bleed. For 5 seconds after using his ult, Rollick uses his knife to attack, gaining increased auto-attack range and his autos apply a tier 1 bleed stack per hit. The enhanced auto-attacks drag his targets towards him because of the hook part in his knife getting caught on them.

Animation ideas

(I used google to find every gif/picture, save for the “dance” one. they have tumblr links bc when writing this tumblr shit itself when i wanted to save it as a draft and i kept it open in a different tab and copy/pasted everything. im sorry some of the gifs are weird aslkfjdjf)

Walking animation is him using his arms and tail to "crawl". imagine the gif has a tail instead of legs

Running animation is the same concept, just with much more effort put into making himself move faster. Moving in the river looks more like he’s swimming rather than crawling. Slowed animation is him dragging himself slowly with his head facing the ground, putting weight on his elbows instead of using his arms completely. Like an army crawl but in pain.

Idle animation is him crossing his arms and resting on his elbows, then looking around and inspecting his claws.

If left in idle animation for more than 15 seconds, he drops down completely and puts his head in his arms and dozes off. Moving after the sleep idle will have him shake his head awake when starting to move.

Death animation is him trying to crawl, being unable to, then collapsing on his side and flopping onto his back.

Taunt animation is him straightening himself then lashing out with his hands and baring his teeth before "biting" the air in the direction he’s standing, voice lines coming out before the bite part.

Joke animation is him chasing his own tail? Maybe he gets tangled in his net after doing it for a second and just struggles there until the animation is interrupted.

Dance is uh. He straightens up and does knife tricks. He doesn’t have legs, doesn’t have a staff like Nami, and just wouldn’t dance like Cassiopeia.

I made the gif using footage from here.

His laugh animation would be him laughing and flopping onto his back, then turning back onto his stomach. All but one of his laughs would be loud and hearty, the one that isn’t would sound like Kung Jin’s laugh.

Voice line ideas

First encounters:

Bilgewater/Bilgewater themed champion:

"Ahoy!" "Ahoy, bucko!" "Ahoy, scallywag."

Multiple champions simultaneously/champions who have a visible partner/partners with them (examples: Kindred, Sejuani, Lulu with Pix, Elise with her Spiderlings, Azir with his Sand Soldiers):

"Ahoy, me hearties."

Pyke:

"Pyke?! I’ve heard stories of you! Though… You’re smaller than I had imagined..." "Hey there, old salt! " "Ahoy, seadog! "

Nami:

"Good to see a friendly face! Shame it’s on the wrong side." "Oh! Little lass! Have you found your stone yet? "

Fizz:

"Little trickster! Where’s your big friend? "

Illaoi:

“Test? Gonna get myself an A-plus-plus! …That’s the good grade, right?

Taunts:

Any champion:

"Scurvy dog! " "AAARRRRGGGGHHHH! "

Bird/bird themed/winged champion:

"Polly want a cracker? "

Tahm Kench:

“The only creature with an appetite bigger than mine” “You put me to shame with that maw of yours! You could fit me in it!”

Abilities/eliminations:

Tier 3 "Feed the Fish.":

(after used on champion wearing armour/with tough skin)

"Ouch… I think I broke a tooth. Good thing I got more. "

(after used on champion with fur/feathers/long hair)

" (violent spitting-out-fluff noises) Blegh! "

Tier 1 and 2 "Hook, Line, Sinker. ":

"Catch! " "Avast, ye! "

Tier 2 "Hook, Line, Sinker. " after turning someone around:

"Bring a spring upon ‘er! " "Broadside! "

Using "Chase. " with a DOT’d champion in range:

"Chum in the water…" " (deep inhale, then a rumbling growl) "

Using "Chase. " with affected champion visible:

"Lookin’ a bit squiffy there…" " (laughter) Yesss… "

Eliminate champion:

"Take a caulk. "

Eliminate champion while using "Cleave ‘Em to the Brisket!" or the enhanced auto-attacks after:

"Hah, keelhauled! " “Taste me steel n’ may the devil take ye!”

“PENTAKILL!”:

"Dead men tell no tales…"

Respawn:

"What a flogging…" "Alright, I’ve fed the fish… Now it’s their turn. "

Pings:

(Danger!):

"Heave to! " "Avast ye! "

(Assist me!):

"All hand hoy! " "All hands on deck! "

(Assist me!) followed up by (On my way!), or vice versa:

"Weigh anchor and hoist the mizzen! "

(Area is warded.):

"They’ve got a lookout. "

(Target champion):

"Thar she blows! " "Sail, ho! " "Savvy? " "Hang ‘em from the Yardarm! "

Miscellaneous:

Allied champion drinks potion or gets healed by another ally when Rollick has missing HP:

"Splice the mainbrace! Please?"

Alone with low HP, no potions or actives available, or sells all items:

"Looks like I’m marooned…"

Healed by ally:

"Feeling shipshape!" "Much obliged." "I’m in your debt." "Thank you!" "Thanks!"

Receives shutdown gold:

"Ha-ha! Plundered! " “Bounty taken.”

Flashing away from enemy:

"Blimey! " "Gah!” "Sink me! " " (girly shriek) "

[makeroomforthejolyghost]

ok well i originally drafted this while thinking about this post, but it’s relevant to what i wanted to say about (my tags on) this one too so i’ll just post it now, how ‘bout that.

i mean, Getting Used to It (and thus expanding your definition of “i’m fine”) isn’t always as dramatic as your brain completely turning off its pain response to an event, so that you don’t realize you’ve injured yourself until some other clue tips you off. that’s certainly happened to me? (and w/ smaller injuries it happens to healthy people too, as when you cut yourself on paper without noticing, and it doesn’t start to hurt until you see it bleed.) but the more everyday/pedestrian forms of this phenomenon are, like. that the level of pain i rated as an 8 in 2016 now reads to me as, like, 5. and that when you’re depressed (or at least when i am), pain goes up but interest in that pain goes down, because of depression’s tendency to normalize negative stimuli.

i think these are two manifestations of the same thing: your brain removes fear from the equation, and since fear makes pain more intense, most pain experienced in fear’s absence seems like no big deal. and that goes double for painful stimuli you once associated with fear but no longer do? in a sorta feedback-loopy way. or at least it does for me. less fear-->less pain-->even less fear the next time something similar happens.

if i sit in nearly any given position too long, one or more of the joints in my legs will sometimes... well, i think subluxate is technically the right word?* but it’s not like a sudden pop: it’s like, as the muscles around them relax my joints slowly slide out of place. as you can imagine (given the low bar required to achieve it), this happens A Lot; i don’t keep track, but probably once a day on average? i know it’s not every day, but also that some days it happens many times, and that both these latter and the days when it doesn’t happen at all often strike me as a change from the norm. so, yeah, probably a mean of once per day. but until sometime in 2019, it used to freak me out—a lot—every time.

it’s often one of those above-mentioned doesn’t hurt until you notice for other reasons scenarios, too, like the paper cut. so i’d be like innocently sitting there, then look down or attempt to adjust position and suddenly OH GOD MY LEG(S). and every time it happened i’d think, “oh god, is this the time i really and truly get stuck and have to be scooped out of this position on a stretcher. fuck, please, no, that would be so humiliating, there’s no way the paramedics would believe me, strangers must not see me like this,” &c., and the more determined i got to prove to myself that i could move, that i wasn’t stuck, that i could get myself out of this, the more horrifically painful these attempts became—partly because fear of pain leads to greater pain, and partly because when you’re panicky you don’t tend to move with much patience or care.

but, of course, every time i would eventually get out of it. it’s hard to say how long it took, because, again, i never timed it, and also because time does weird shit when you’re freaking out. (plus i have adhd, so my estimates of how long things take aren’t the greatest to begin with.) i want to say though that the longest i ever took unpretzeling myself in this way was an hour and a half—and i usually took way less time than that. (it’s hard also to estimate because these days exceeding ten minutes marks an especially long battle of this kind.) iirc, the ~90-minute incident was like, my right hip already felt not quite right, and someone on the internet recommended W-sitting as a way to reduce a subluxed hip, and i tried it because i either didn’t know at that time or had forgotten that when i W-sit for more than a few seconds i often misplace several toes, up to two joints per knee, maybe an ankle, and/or at least one hip. some of these will reduce themselves automatically as soon as i move; others i can only move passively until after i’ve reduced them. so like, that endeavor was a fucking jigsaw puzzle, and good luck figuring those out when a. every wrong move doubles the pain and panic you’re in, but b. leaving the puzzle unfinished is also agonizing. most of the time it was not that bad.

…what was my point? oh yeah: this sat-wrong-now-my-leg’s-stuck business still happens a lot, and it’s n o t like sitting on a pen, where your brain eventually gives up on signaling your discomfort.** nor like when you’re running on adrenaline and your brain doesn’t bother to tell you you’re hungry. nor like what tumblr user bibliosphere described, where her brain evidently just… prioritized other tasks over the “hey please fix this leg” alarm that pain would have signified. but incidents like this do, literally, hurt less the tenth time they happen than they do the first time, and it’s not because your body Toughens Up or whatever either (that only works w/ exercise-related muscle pain); it’s because your brain learns that this event does not pose imminent danger. a subluxation you know how to reduce will hurt less than one you don’t.

that’s what the “i’m always subluxing” version of the hulk meme means. most chronically ill people describe this whole phenomenon as more like the argument from “shot in the knee theory.” as like, you stop screaming because you learn screaming doesn’t help. and i mean… yeah? but ime it’s more that you stop screaming*** when you learn what does help. the OP in that post asks rhetorically,

Are you going to scream and cry the entire time, or are you going to come to grips with reality and accept the fact that freaking out isn’t going to make the ambulance come any faster?

and jesus christ, OP, are you kidding? in real life? definitely the first one! if you literally got shot in the knee, you wouldn’t just scream because it hurt—you would scream also because holy shit, am i gonna die of blood loss? why did they shoot me? are they going to shoot me again??? and pain you’ve had for years, or an injury you’ve sustained many times before, is nothing like that. if it scares you at all, the content of your fear is more like, oh, crap. what’s this gonna feel like tomorrow. will i have to cancel my plans again?

*n.b. i’ve never had this confirmed by a doctor. i just assume that’s what’s happening because 1. the sensations’ non-pain components are very similar to what the subluxations i have had confirmed feel like; 2. if it’s a joint i can see from my position (e.g., the ankle pressed against the floor when criss-cross-applesauced), it usually looks a little fucked up; and 3. it behaves quite differently from regular stiffness, joints in this scenario feeling not so much too tight to move properly as like i keep aiming for and missing the lever that moves them. (and each failed attempt HURTS like my soft tissues are pumpkin guts and my bones are knives trying to scoop them out.)

**i’ve never actually tried this experiment, though, and i’ve heard it doesn’t work on some autistic people. hopefully this goes without saying lmao but my sensory perceptions are Weird in General, so, any hypotheses i build upon them should be salted liberally

***well, whimpering, anyway. for me at least, if i literally scream at an injury it’s not from the pain, it’s from the surprise. i’m more likely to scream when i stub my toe than when i try to bite and my jaw crunches sideways, because the latter is a possibility i sign up for every time i put food in my mouth, whereas like. ob…viously you wouldn’t have stubbed your toe if you’d already known the object you accidentally kicked was there. (except i guess in movies when people kick objects to express rage, forgetting that this will hurt them. in that case i suppose they scream partly from surprise and partly because negative stimuli encountered in “fight” mode reinforce preexisting anger. wow i digress lmao sorry.) but reactions like whimpering, clenching your teeth, &c. only partly come from surprise; they’re also stims, i think, tho clearly not ones unique to ND people. the woman who pierced my ears when i was a kid told me to focus on tapping first one foot and then the other, so i wouldn’t shrink away. i think it’s kinda like that: it releases nervous energy, gives you a competing stimulus to focus on.

[dipifica]

need help/new story!

hey everyone!!! i know ive been m.i.a. when it comes to the fanfic scene but i have the first chapter of a new story and its......a 10 things i hate about you au! i love this movie a ton and really love the idea so i thought i would try it out! under the read more below is the first draft of chapter 1! i dont usually do this but i would totally appreciate any comments or suggestions on this first chapter (also if you want more/would read until the end, etc.) since im busy and have been having personal problems i feel it would help me be motivated if people were interested! this is a rough draft so things can change but for sure couples are dippica (dipper/pacifica) and wenbel (wendy/mabel) ages are moved around as well but only so i can have the whole gang in high school at once. anyways yeah! please tell me what you think!

Wendy Corduroy adjusted her baseball cap for the final time before deciding that, eh, that will do. She had never been one for nervousness, frankly she considered herself to be one of the chillest people she knew (except around family, but who was stress-free around their family ever?), but today was a brand new day full of brand new people in a brand new place.

Wendy and her family has moved to Gravity Falls only a month ago because the work was good for her lumberjack father. With the world moving faster and faster everyday, Wendy’s father couldn’t seem to keep up and decided a quieter, more rustic town would do well for the entire family. Luckily, the Corduroy children weren’t incredibly disappointed. Wendy was a starting her senior year somewhere new, but she tried to look on the bright side. If she loved it here, she will be happy, and if she hated it, hey, she’s in college next year anyway.

She got an E-Mail the night before instructing her about the school’s transfer policy, each transfer student would be assigned another student to lead them around the school, answer questions, and be a “friend” although Wendy knew well that the school couldn’t make her be friends with anyone. Still, she thought it was somewhat unnecessary, the school wasn’t huge and she was a senior, the last thing she needed was to look lame asking someone younger than her about her school.

“Name, please?” A man asked her as she approached the main office.

“Wendy Corduroy.” She stated, the school was a lot smaller than her last with far less students. Maybe her adventure would turn out to be a dud after all.

“Gideon Gleeful?” The man called to a group of student leaders. Wendy turned to see no one answer, than out from the corner a boy with white hair, dressed business-casual stood up.

“Yes, sir!” He replied.

“Your transfer. Wendy Corduroy, this is Gideon. Gideon, Wendy.”

“Nice to meet you.” Wendy shook the boy’s hand thinking how he even looked too young to be in high school.

“To you as well.” Gideon replied.

“If you have any questions, Gideon will answer them for you. Now, go ahead and start the tour. Next in line?”

“Right this way, Ms. Corduroy.” Gideon exclaimed.

“Wendy is fine, thanks. You are…..chipper.” Wendy chuckled. “If you don’t mind me asking…how old are you?”

“I’m 15 years old!” Gideon seemed to get somewhat angry. “I’m a sophomore this year at GFHS and I am so sick of people asking my age…” He muttered.

“I’m sorry, dude.” Wendy apologized. “You know, it’s good to look youthful.”

Gideon sighed. “Not when you are trying to get a girlfriend. Well, let’s start the tour anyway, you are gonna need a lot of help from me!” Gideon perked up and started his journey down the south east hall, Wendy trailing behind him.

—

“And that wraps up the English department. Next we have-“

“Gideon, can we just end the tour here? I think I’ll figure it out.” Wendy slumped over and sat down in front of a locker. Her feet killed as Gideon insisted on taking the stairs everywhere.

“We have so much more to see, Wendy!” Gideon exclaimed. “We still have the art wing, the back alley, the make out tree!”

“I really think I’ll catch on.” Wendy sighed and hung her head.

“‘Cuse me?” A perky, girl’s voice called from above. Wendy pulled her head back to see a beautiful young girl. “So sorry to bug you but you are blocking my locker.”

“I-uh…yeah. No, I’m sorry.” Wendy picked herself off and moved out of the pretty girl’s way.

“Hey, don’t be!” She smiled. “Are you new? I’ve never seen you around before.”

“Yeah, I am. Wendy Corduroy.” Wendy stuck her hand out.

“Mabel Pines!” Mabel trapped her hand and shook. Her hands were soft in Wendy’s and Wendy suddenly felt light as a feather. “You’ll love it here. Always something going on.” Mabel grabbed the book she needed from her locker and shut it. “I gotta go, but it was great meeting you, Wendy Corduroy!”

“You too, Mabel Pines.” Wendy replied, her heart dancing inside her. She usually wasn’t one for love at first sight but…wow. Mabel smiled once more and turned to join two other girls waiting on the corner for her.

“Don’t push your luck with her.” Gideon snapped Wendy out of her love-filled day dream. “Mabel Pines doesn’t date. Not allowed in fact.”

“Oh really, why is that?” Wendy asked, eyes still on the beautiful junior before her.

“Protective parents. You know, I even heard she’s not allowed to date until her brother does.”  

“Brother?” Wendy questioned.

“Twin brother, Dipper Pines. Basically the biggest dork this school has ever seen.” Gideon chuckled.

“That’s not you?”

“Watch it newbie.” Gideon glared. “No one will go out with him.”

“Hey, can you do me a favor?” Wendy batted her eyelashes.

“Ugh, Dipper is straight and so am I.” Gideon groaned. “And we aren’t that close yet, sister. Maybe you could…”

“Hi,very gay.” Wendy responded. “Plus, I’d feel bad…”

“But you were ready to throw me into the ring, huh?”

“Look, there’s gotta be some way to get her brother a date and get her to…is she gay?” Wendy asked, deciding in the moment it would be best to get that settled before she devised any schemes.

“Heard through the grapevine she’s had summer camp flings with girls and guys. So bi?” Gideon shrugged.

—-

“Ladies!” Gideon called over to two girls who did not look pleased to see him. Wendy trailed behind, listening in on the conversation.

“What do you want Gideon?” The larger girl sighed.

“Just a quick question, Mabel, straight or…?”

“She’s not into you.” The smaller girl rolled her eyes. “She can’t date, you know this better than anyone.”

“Right, right, right, that was last year. I actually am on the market for someone new.” He winked to them, which they groaned and turned their backs to him in response. “So she is or?”

“Bi, weirdo!” One yelled back.

“Wait like, she’s bi, or like goodbye to me?” Gideon yelled back.

“Like she’s bi, idiot!”

“Okay, thanks!” Gideon scurried back over to Wendy who was now crouched behind a trash can.

“You had a thing for her? Should I be worried?”

“Last year, Wendy. Last year.” He waved his hand in the air. “Although Mabel did at one time own my heart, she made it clear even if she was to date…it wouldn’t be me.”

Wendy placed a hand on his shoulder. “I have your blessing?”

“Yeah, but you have to help me find a lady of my own now.”

Wendy laughed. “Okay. In the meantime, tell me more about Dipper Pines.”

—-

Wendy and Gideon sat at the table across from Dipper’s, watching him read a book that was in a language Wendy could not understand. “Damn, you really weren’t kidding. No friends?”

“Dipper can come off as a know-it-all jerkface.” Gideon whispered. “Half of the student body thinks he’s an weirdo nerd, the other half is afraid of him.”

“Afraid of him?”

“He’s got an interest in the paranormal. Really freaky shit.”

“I mean, that’s not that weird…”

“He’s had a few incidents at school…” Wendy raised an eyebrow. “Look, by now you know Gravity Falls isn’t exactly a normal town, we are home to some weird, unexplainable stuff. Dipper…exploits it. Brings it to school. We’ve basically had a lot of lockdowns because of him. Even his perfect grades couldn’t keep him out of multiple suspensions, and causing mass panic every few months doesn’t make him that popular.”

“Damn.” Wendy breathed. “So finding someone to date this guy is going to be…”

“Impossible? Yes.”

“No one comes to mind? Come on Gid, there’s gotta be someone willing and desperate!” Wendy whisper-screamed. “Maybe someone we can even blackmail?”

Gideon perked up and suddenly smiled widely. “Oh, I have just the person. This tour is about to get way more fun than what I expected.”

—

“Her?” Wendy asked. “She’s gorgeous.”

“And my only lead.” Gideon muttered. “Play it cool.”

“I always do!” Wendy scoffed as she followed Gideon towards the beautiful blonde standing at her locker.

“Pacifica Northwest, how are you?” Gideon greeted. The girl visibly sighed and rolled her eyes.

“Gleeful, a new school year is not going to make me forget how big of a weirdo you are. Move along.” She spat.

Gideon let out a chuckle and Wendy caught on he was most certainly enjoying this. “Actually, darling,” He grinned. “I think you should be a bit nicer to me from now on.”

“Psh. Why would I ever show you any sort of kindness? Get lost.” She slammed her locker and started to move away.

“Welcome to Posh Burger, can I interest you in some fries today?” Gideon stated simply, still grinning, causing Pacifica to stop dead in her tracks.

“No. Way.” She muttered, turning back. “Listen, you-“

“No, you listen.” Gideon interrupted, pulling out his phone revealing multiple pictures of Pacifica working at a burger joint. “I’ve got proof here that Miss Gravity Falls herself, works at Posh Burger two towns over. What happened Paz? Daddy ran out of money?”

“That is none of your business! And this right now, is just about the creepiest thing you have ever done!” Pacifica rose her voice. “Delete them.”

“The students of GFHS have a right to know what their homecoming queen does on the weekends. It would take one simple click…”

“What do you want? Is that what this is, some sort of blackmail?”

“Gideon, maybe we shouldn’t-“ Wendy started, not wanting to ruin some junior’s life on her first day.

“Wendy, you are new around here, but trust me, 85% of the school population would expose this brat the second they could. I’m a saint.” Gideon turned his attention back to the blonde. “It is a blackmail thing. We want you to take Dipper Pines out on a date.”

“He’s even worse than you.” Pacifica sighed. “Why would you ever care about Dipper Pines’ dating experience?”

“Wendy’s got a thing for Mabel Pines. Mabel doesn’t date until Dipper does. It’s simple really. You date Dipper, Wendy woos Mabel, and these pictures stay safe with me. In return, Wendy’s basically my slave and you have to date Dipper in the first place. Satisfying enough for me.”

Wendy shrugged and for the first time wondered what she was getting herself into.

“You’re cruel. This is going to ruin me.” Pacifica sighed.

“I think these pictures will more so.”

“Maybe I’ll take my chances.” Pacifica glared.

“No, wait! I’ll-uh-I’ll pay you for every date.” Wendy offered.

“Corduroy, what’s the deal?” Gideon whispered.

“I’m starting a new job over the weekend. I’ll pay you for every date you take him on. And-And we won’t leak the pictures. Deal?” Wendy stuck her hand out for a handshake.

Pacifica eyed her hand, then eyed Gideon who’s finger hovered over a send button. “…Deal.” She shook her hand. “Gideon, you just made it to the top of my shit list.”

“I’m humbled.” Gideon put on hand on his heart. “As an added bonus, I’ll be your information guide. Dipper usually hangs around Lab 324 after school, I think. Best to start the courting early.”

Pacifica cringed. “Whatever.” Pacifica finally got to storm away without interruption and as soon as she knew she was alone, she let out a frustrated scream.

——-

Pacifica paced outside Lab 324, she peeked her head through the small window and saw Dipper Pines sitting with headphones in and writing quickly in his notebook. She didn’t know why she felt so nervous. She tried to convince herself it was the fact this guy had almost destroyed the school and town multiple times, but she knew what it truly was, and feared fulfilling Wendy and Gideon’s task would be far harder than seducing just any nerd. This wasn’t just some nerd, it was Dipper Pines. The Dipper Pines that helped her a few years ago and showed her how horrible her parents could be. She now had to face, trick, and lead on the one who believed she could be better. She was going to prove his belief in her wrong all over again.

She thought back to the photos and sighed. It’s just this one guy. She thought. It’s not like he is a saint either. She recalled all the mean things he said about her that same day of the party.

The memory drove her to finally open the door, alerting Dipper to turn and pull his earphones out. “Pacifica.” He stated, he didn’t seem confused as to why she was there.

“Hey, Dipper.” She said, awkwardly strutting in and leaning on the table next to him. “How have you been?”

“Oh, so now you’ll talk to me?” He spat right away. Pacifica hoped he would be polite and act as if they had no past, but no one was around them to fake for.

“Don’t be like that, I was just a kid-“

“Just a kid two years ago when you refused to acknowledge my existence in front of your popular friends.”

“A lot can change in two years.”

“Yeah, but not that much.”

“Dipper, come on, I know I’ve been a real jerk to you in the past, but I was wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime. You know, like old times?”

Dipper stared into Pacifica’s eyes. “…What do you want?”

“To hang out with you.”

“No, what do you want? You choose now to suddenly rekindle our…semi-friendship almost four years after the fact? Is there another ghost in the manor?”

“No, I want to hang out, Dipper. I’m sorry if you felt like I ditched you.”

“I didn’t feel any way, you did ditch me.”

Pacifica remained silent, backed into a corner by Dipper’s words. She couldn’t argue it wasn’t true, the two had connected, even if it was a short time. By the time freshmen year pulled around, Pacifica learned fast how to survive in a bigger school: cut off the people that didn’t fit in.

“You know I’m right. You are so easy to read.” Dipper scoffed, packed up his things, and left the room.

Pacifica was left standing on her own, feeling guilty and frustrated.

[ubizheroes]

How Small Digital Publishers Can Grow Their Network and Save Time

Posted by lydiagilbertson

Being a small or startup publishing company is hard. The digital advertising industry is broken. Larger companies like Vox and Buzzfeed are some of the only online publications that can hope to monetize their content effectively. Smaller niche publications often have an even harder time attracting return visitors or getting people outside of their current active users to see their content at all. Already at a disadvantage, most small publications are also understaffed and underfunded. These publications can use content marketing and search marketing concepts within their online distribution strategy to better reach their audiences and to compete with bigger publications.

Platforms as distributors

Somehow, platforms have long been both the saviors and the destroyers of the digital publishing industry. Regardless, they’ve become a necessary evil for the content distribution strategy of almost all online publishing companies. There’s no real harm in trying out different ways to reach your audience, but don’t waste your time on a platform that isn’t growing your audience or enhancing its engagement. The usual contenders being Facebook and Twitter, there are a few more platforms that can be easily utilized towards helping you to reach your audience.

1. AMP

Google’s Accelerated Mobile Page (AMP) project is a complex attempt by Google to make pages load faster on mobile devices, keep users on their platform, and to better engage with the publishing community. Many larger sites report a lot of success using AMP. Smaller publishers may be wary of trying out AMP on their sites, out of fear that it will further overwork their staff or that it requires an intense amount of web development knowledge. However, Google AMP is fairly simple to implement (more on how further down the page) if you’re using WordPress or another common content management system.

Companies using WordPress will have an especially easy time adding AMP to the list of ways they distribute their content. Both WordPress and Yoast have plugins available to put (and manage) your content into the AMP format. Medium is also in the process of allowing its users an easy way to designate AMP content. Here are a few things to keep in mind before publishing your content via AMP:

Make sure it’s in article format. AMP is meant for blog posts and news articles, so don’t try to publish products or landing pages using Google AMP.

Be conscious of the audience you’re publishing for when using AMP. Articles that appear in the Google AMP carousel in the SERP are usually topical and considered “news.”

If your site is struggling with speed issues, AMP could be a part (but not all) of the solution, as it will help your articles load more quickly on mobile devices.

If your site doesn’t use WordPress, implementing AMP might be a little bit harder than just downloading a plugin for your CMS. Find more out about that process here.

Analytics tracking should be included in your overall traffic and segmented to show how much traffic comes from AMP. Find out more about AMP and Google Analytics here.

2. Medium

Medium is another platform that can help more users to see your content and stay on the page long enough to read it. Like any platform, hosting your entire site on Medium comes with the risk of giving your content to another entity rather than your own website. This is a concern because hosting all of your content somewhere like Medium means it could make changes to the platform that you may not like, or in severe situations shut down entirely (and take your content with it). It also has limited capabilities with on-page ads. However, there are some larger publishers that have been adopting Medium as their main source of content distribution. There are several benefits to doing this:

Medium has a built-in audience of millions of engaged readers.

Most of the content on Medium is high quality.

Migrating your entire site to the Medium platform is actually relatively easy for both WordPress and non-WordPress sites. Be sure to keep in mind that hosting all of your content on a platform can be risky.

Another way to utilize Medium’s built-in audience is to republish your content onto the platform. Medium allows for its users to write content on their platform and then canonicalize to their own website (that’s not on Medium). This allows small publishers to pick which content goes on Medium (much like a social media platform) in order to make sure it’s targeted to Medium’s user-base.

3. Google News

Google News is a section of the search engine results page that focuses entirely on timely news content. In order for many websites to be featured in this specialized SERP, they have to go through the application process and get accepted into the Google News program. After acceptance, the site has to follow and keep a specific set of meta tags up-to-date, only posting timely content designated for the platform. Find out more about how to get accepted into Google News here.

Utilize content marketing tools

Outside of monetization, the number-one hurdle that most small publishing companies face is being understaffed and overworked. One way to remedy this is using tools that help diminish the workload involved in managing content-heavy sites. Here are a list of tools that can help small publishers cut down on their tasks:

1. CoSchedule

CoSchedule is editorial calendar software that minimizes time spent keeping track of all of the posts you want/need to do on any given day. It’s designed for both small and enterprise companies, but is better suited for smaller ones due to its all-in-one approach. CoSchedule allows you to plan your posts in advance and set a time for when to post them on social media platforms, all in a single tool.

2. BuzzSumo

Ideating different pieces of content for your site takes a significant amount of time. Utilizing a tool like BuzzSumo could help you to come up with a ton of different article concepts based on what’s trending on different social media platforms.

3. Canva

Having a small team usually means that your graphic designer is extremely busy (or nonexistent). Making quick graphics and supplementary images for your posts can totally be done utilizing Canva, without bogging down your graphics team with more work than it can handle (plus, there’s a free version).

Focus on your niche

Find your niche and build your audience. Obviously, this is easier said than done. But, it’s extremely important as a small publisher to be filling a void or taking a different perspective in the already overflowing content funnel of the Internet. Find your unique voice and the people that want to hear it. Sticking to your publication’s brand or niche will in turn build you a specialized audience. This allows prospective advertisers to better target and then convert using your content.

Don’t always focus on quantity, but quality

Similar to the last point, in addition to not overstretching your genre, don’t overstretch your posting frequency. Rather than posting more times per day just to meet an imaginary quota, it’s better to create fewer posts of higher quality. Moz did a publishing experiment that illustrates the complexity of publishing frequency and content quality. Pay more attention to what your users want rather than what you assume Google does.

Summary

Being a small publishing company is hard. Most small publications find themselves understaffed and overworked trying to catch up with much larger companies.The best way to try to compete with larger publishing companies is to keep your focus small and to use external applications. They’ll help you save time and make creating easier. Utilize all of the platforms that work for your audience — not just all of the platforms available.

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