#proddy c

[hiatus-xix]

☁️ Drunk Lover | ArthurTV

Summary: Coming to pick up Arthur after a particularly boozy Fellas shoot, you come to realise just how much of a drunk lover, Arthur really is

Notes: Happy Valentines <3 🫡

"You feel so nice-"

You were met with an overwhelming weight as Arthur almost toppled over to you, arms slinging around your shoulders and loosely dragging you closer to his chest, his arms letting all his bodily weight rest on you whilst he swayed you from side to side in his drunken embrace.

It was fair to say you were just slightly shocked by your boyfriend's loving greeting, his eyes closed and head resting atop yours as he hugged you, inhaling deeply and allowing his senses grant him a sense of moment - inhaling your scent and sighing contentedly, comforted by the affirmation of your presence which your familiar aroma provided to Arthur. 

He was drunk. 

Off his head.

You'd expected he wouldn't be very sober, having given you a warning at the beginning of the night before he'd left that he was doing a video with The Fellas which Chip had organised ("look, he's just always finds away to get me drunk or in a life-threatening position! I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW-!" ) and clearly the video had ended exactly how Arthur had anticipated.

Proddy had been the one to make the call to you, as the only completely sober cast member, speaking quite calmly yet with a tone of urgency.

"You able to come get Arthur?" Proddy had asked, concern evident within his voice. 

"I've just come back from work - where are you - is everything okay?" You'd only just taken your heels off having returned home from your 9-to-5 and weren't exactly looking to go out again, but the bother within Proddy's voice did unsettle you slightly, raising a slight anxiety to your throat as you wondered whether Arthur was alright.

"Just off Carnaby Street, by one of the pubs, I'll send my location." Proddy recounted, never failing to be helpful. "Everything's... not bad. I just think you might wanna get Arthur. Chip's given him too much to drink again. Even Chip's a state, to be honest. Sabina's my next call."

"Right, if you get that location sent I can get there in the next half hour, Calum," You began slipping your shoes back on - the same stilettos you'd worn to work, shoulder connecting your phone to your ear as you manhandled the heels back on, hearing some commotion from Proddy's side.

"Is t-that Arthur's bird?" You heard slurring in the background which was unmistakeably Chip. "Tell herrshe has a FAT BACK-"

You cut the phone before you could hear any more of Chip's drunken rambles, instead slipping your phone into your bag and getting back into the car, thanking some otherworldly powers for the lack of traffic and congestion that swiftly brought you to the mess that Arthur Television was when you found him outside The White Horse pub.

"Oh I'm so happy to see you," Arthur was somehow even more enamoured than normal, and didn't fail to press a myriad of kisses to your forehead and temple and whole face to show you that - regardless of your swatting at him. 

"Yeahyeahyeah, you too love," You pulled him somewhat off and instead let him lean his weight on you from the side as you surveyed the scene.

George was riding a rodeo bull and yelling something unintelligible, Chip lying face-down at a booth, Randolph doing some sort of drinking challenge (it was unclear what exactly) and Calfreezy unmovingly sat in the corner with a pair of ski sunglasses and a wide brimmed safari hat stoutly  sat atop his head.

Proddy appeared from the doorway after a moment, making you  breathe a sigh of relief as you made eye contact - Calum giving a short side hug in greeting to you, briefly holding the side that wasn't already occupied by Arthur. 

"Thank you for calling me," You quickly spoke as you felt Arthur stiffen in your arms. Your hand almost instinctively came up to his chest, rubbing at his defined muscles through the thin costume shirt Arthur had been forced into - your fingers tracing down to his stomach and massaging the defined abs as you did whenever your mans felt sick. Though Arthur's stiffness appeared to not be because of an upset stomach.

"Don'tttouch my girlfriend-" Arthur weakly pointed a finger at Calum, making you facepalm as you took Arthur's wrist and redirected it back down to his side - looking up at Arthur's bewildered wide-eyes which stared with confusion at you, shocked as you'd lowered his hand.

"Proddy's the only reason I'm here for you, he's the one that made the call for me to get you home," You lightly scolded your just-slightly jealous boyfriend, smiling as Arthur simply sniffed, still miffed regardless.

"If you're annoyed with me, you should've heard what Chip was saying at her whilst I called her" Proddy's snickers stopped as you shot him a shutthefuckup look, though it appeared to be too late, as Arthur let out a gasp and attempted to storm back into the pub and confront the curly-headed man who'd just stepped off of the rodeo bull.

"OH NONONO-" You pulled Arthur back, sitting him on one of the barstools instead, making him look up at you as you stood between his manspread legs, holding either of his hands in yours to hold his attention whilst you spoke: "Why don't we go home for now, yeah?"

Your suggestion was met by a blank expression, as Arthur was alternately distracted by how you looked - eyes tracing down your body from the unbuttoned top of your fitted white shirt, covered by a professional grey blazer and matching grey skirt that clung to the curvaceous outline of your hips, black tights sheer and showing off those perfect legs Arthur wished were wrapped around your head - the tall black heels almost intoxicating Arthur as he began pondering on just how good they made you look.

"Oh my God, is this what you wear to work?" Arthur's hands groggily found your hips, senses heightened as he felt every ridge of the stiff material against his fingertips, feeling over your hips and bringing a blush to your cheeks as he fixated on the material. "How has someone more successful and handsome than me not stolen you away from me yet-"

"You are speaking absolute nonsense," You shook your head to disguise the blush that rose to your cheeks at the self demeaning compliment Arthur dished.

"No, I'm being deadly serious-" Arthur did not in fact stop. "You're so out of my league, like, I don't know how I bagged you-" 

You tried to interrupt but Arthur was a rolling boulder at this point.

"-Honestly, some days I see you before you go to work and I just don't understand - how did someone so truly beautiful end up with me?? Beautiful inside out mind you, you're the genuinely smartest person I've ever met and speak so much logic - I've never met anyone as philosophical and deep as you-"

Your heart was in your throat as you pressed your lips to Arthur's, cutting his ramblings off with the ineluctable necessity that was a kiss. You knew he was drunk - you knew he was speaking his mind, too - but you didn't want to let drunken ramblings elicit such a visceral pain in your chest from how much you truly loved your boyfriend.

No, you wanted to show your boyfriend how much you loved him and remove him from this situation where he was likely going to regret everything after a sleep at home. 

"C'mon sweetie, let's get you home now, recordings done my love," You coaxed, lifting his arm and placing it over your shoulders so that you could haul and direct him back to the car. 

"Can I say goodbye to everyone?" Arthur looked at you with the pleading puppy eyes you couldn't say no to. 

A sigh gave him the answer he needed - and he kept his arm around you as he went to wish goodbye to everyone. 

"Love you, Chip!" Arthur said as he tried to wave goodbye to the final cast member.

"COME SHOW MY YOU LOVE ME, ION BELIEVE YOU, YO-ou lying mon-grel-" Chip collapsed into the seat behind him - not passing out - simply losing balance. He laughed as his back hit the leather seat, though you were slightly more appalled as your boyfriend advanced towards the man to really show him how much he loved him.

"Arthur, nonononNONO-" You were too late to stop Arthur, as you watched your boyfriend collapse into the arms of the sitting Chippo and press his lips onto his temple with a loud kissy noise, the man behind the camera laughing as the recorded your devastation at the sight of Chip kissing Arthur - his hand dropping to the brunet's ass whilst embracing.

"Right, that's absolutely enough- come on Arthur-"

At long last, you did manage to haul Arthur up to his feet and across the pub, before Arthur decided he was sick of walking normally and wanted to pick you up and throw you over his shoulder - causing you to elicit a yelp as Arthur effortlessly picked you up and slung you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes - his strength despite being drunk shocking you, as he still managed to walk you out of the bar without falling over or tipping you. 

You didn't even resign or tell him to put you down at this point - as long as you were going to your car, you were fine with whatever happened. You just wanted to go home and get Arthur there, too.

"You have such thick thighs my days," Arthur spoke with such a tone you couldn't tell whether he was admiring or complaining. You rolled your eyes and didn't respond, however. "I think you should sit on my face more often-"

You slapped your hand over Arthur's mouth. Silencing him so that he could walk you to the car without loudly rambling about your sex life. Hearing Freezy and Proddy's laughter told you all you needed to know about who heard Arthur's comment, too, and simply made you fall slack, giving up in Arthur's arms and just letting him carry you away and to the car which wasn't too far from the pub. 

"I'll drive-" 

You stopped Arthur pretty quickly with that one, launching him into the passengers seat and shutting the door before hopping into the drivers' seat and turning your keys, breathing a sigh of relief at the fact that you were at least going home at this point. 

Pulling out, waving at Proddy who gave a nod back and getting back onto the roads, you turned the radio onto a different frequency until loud n clear, The Smiths began playing something at a soothing pace which you listened to - withdrawing your hand from the dial.

"Can you hold my hand?" Arthur asked quietly from the seat besides you.

Your touch-loving boyfriend's request was met (because who could really deny him with that politeness n shy tone), as you let your hand intertwine with his over the centre panel. You were internally thankful that you drove an automatic car, meaning you wouldn't have to control a gearstick, and could instead let your thumb rub over the back of his hand consolingly. 

Finally, arriving back at the apartment, you managed to get Arthur up the stairs and back into your room, locking the door and thankgodFINALLY taking your heels off, breathing a sigh of relief as you slipped into your fluffy slippers instead. 

"You comin'?" You heard Arthur call from the adjacent room. You had only just slipped your stretching your calves to try and release some of that tension within the muscle when you padded across the living room to stand in the doorway of the bedroom. 

And you couldn't help but smile, observing at how cute Arthur appeared, sprawled out and half covered by duvet - his face smushed down into the pillow as he lay diagonally on the bed, looking up at you with wide doe-y eyes begging for you to come and join him. You had to cross your arms and shake your head however, making a whine fall from his lips as you spoke over his noise- "I have work to be doing, Arthur, I still have a case to be looking at from home-"

"Pleaaase, I can't sleep if you're not next to me," Arthur pleaded, rolling over so that he could look at you straight - although you could tell that his vision was obscured by the alcohol he'd drank, as he blinked drowsily and looked up with half-lidded, half-confused eyes. He really did need to sleep.

"Really Arthur - I can join you later but I need to work, and you need to sleep-"

He paused for a moment, bottom lip poutily stuck out as he absorbed your words and acknowledged them before... “Can’t you bring it here? Just... sit next to me and do it?”

And his proposition made you pause to consider it. Because of all things that could've fallen from his lips - a reasonable compromise wasn't what you were expecting. And as though Arthur could read your mind and tell that you were seriously considering at as an option, he quietly added "Just want you here with me," with such a softness and sweetness in his voice that wasn't helped as he only further persuaded you with: "I won't ask anything more - I'll be silent and I won't disturb you - promise..."

"You promise?" You repeated to get confirmation with a raised brow, knowing that you were already going to agree regardless of his answer. Sweet, obedient, drunk and needy Arthur rapidly nodded in response anyways - shuffling along the bed and straightening himself out so that you could join him in the bed.

Collecting you laptop and charger and paperwork from the other room, you put it to the side of the room and stripped out of your work clothes - changing into some comfortable sweater and pair of shorts (whilst Arthur watched in silence - just appreciating the fact that he was blessed enough to have that view) and turning the lights off - creating a darkness that'd let Arthur get his rest and instead turning your bedside lamp on so that you could still work.

You sidled into the bed, setting your laptop on your lap and turning the brightness all the way down - getting ready for some work that'd put your eyes under incredibly unhealthy strain.

Arthur sweetened the strain as he got closer beneath the duvet, shuffling from his side over to yours and letting his hand come to your leg that was splayed out at his level - wrapping his arm around it and shuffling so that he was close to it - holding your thigh as if spooning it in replacement for your body whilst you were busy working.

"So soft n perfect.." He mumbled, bringing his head close to rest against it too, making a warm smile grace over your lips as you found yourself distracted - looking down at how cute he looked - a mess of brown fluffy hair, pawing and so cutely cuddled up to your thigh. 

"You're a clingy drunk, you know that?" Your voice was velvet soft and quiet as your hand came down to his head - fingers interweaving between his locks and coming to massage his scalp and play with his already-messy hair.

“Not clingy,” He protested sleepily, his lips brushing over your knee as he kept his arms firmly around your leg. “Just...obsessed. With...these perfect, thick, pillowy thighs...”

"Arthur," You chuckled slightly at his lack of filter. "God, you are such a sweetheart.."

Arthur let out a noise of appreciation - something between a hum and a fulfilled sigh - and you continued looking down at him and playing with his hair until you felt his breathing slow against your leg - eyes relax and close while soft snores fell from his lips. Asleep.

"Goodnight, cutie," You whispered at his sleeping body - knowing he wouldn't be able to hear it, nor feel your lips on the back of your head as you ducked down and pressed your lips to his temple, admiring how innocent and cute he looked with his face smushed up to the side of your leg - lip caught slightly against the flesh and keeping his mouth just slightly ajar, causing those soft little snores to fall from his lips.

Even if you acted like he was a heavy load whilst drunk, you couldn't pretend you didn't absolutely love seeing him all soft and domestic like this <3

just this once boys

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[fraener]

11/25/24

having a craving for beef today so i might get some soon. also craving sweets. trumpet boy is coming to visit soon so i want to get my house spick and span for that to happen im sooooooo excited. landlords are no longer going away for months which is really sad...both for the sake of connies health and cause i was really looking forward to having some peace and quiet around here! theyre going for a week or so at some point to sell their sailboat which is sad. will have to think about moving maybe cause i like my privacy and theyre kinda weird about space. so sad also that p+s are leaving soon but really glad to be spending some time with them before they go. i hope they come back. last night at eeme with c was weird and they wouldnt really talk to me and hid kind of but s was nice to me and it seemed like they didnt know what was happening at all. feeling cold and tired but excited here and there. not looking forward to teaching my new throwing group tonight but here we go...gonna hopefully see h afterwards i miss him a lot. well after work he grabbed me and brought me home and when i saw him for longer i felt less excited to be around him because he was being very pokey and proddy physically which i cant really understand...this is a relatively recent development in our relationship where he kind of treats me like his cat and just grabs and touches me whenever he wants which i dont really like especially because he often physically restrains me. and then when we were cuddling in bed and i commented on how late it was and said i had to go to bed he said ok ill go since you dont seem very interested in cuddling anyways and i felt hurt by that cause i was like what do you think it is were doing right this minute...and then he said he didnt listen to the music i made that i sent him yet and he saw my score and laughed at me and was like "do you need help writing music cause i know how to do that" kind of dont feel like i need any help or advice from someone who doesnt really make music anymore and pretty much just learns other peoples songs on the guitar! just dont like that things have been emotionally and personally distant and his way of trying to close that gap is by thinking he should be grabbing me and picking me up or preventing me from moving around or getting away from him. i dont know. sometimes it feels like he makes these bids for attention he knows will make me uncomfortable or i dont like them on purpose so he can validate the rejection he feels cause im not giving him what hes expecting from me. i really just want this to be normal and i keep coming into our interactions thinking things will be fine and weve moved on but he cant seem to let it go in the way he behaves. he spent so much money on the san juan trip i know i have to go...and i do want to go but i just dont like being around someone thats doing things that make me uncomfortable, especially when i tell them and then they give an overblown overly accommodating response like a punishment. also not sure what to say or do about r coming to visit me. i want to have my interaction with him freely and i know if i tell h about it hes just going to flip out instead of listening to me. maybe if he flips out and then goes out of town he can cool off there. or hell be texting and calling me the whole time freaking out. ugh idk. im getting mad about it just thinking about it. especially the thing where he only gets really shitty to me if he thinks whoever it is i have a crush on has a penis that makes me angrier than anything else.

[rubiaryutheroyal]

Do you have a rule page? Are people just allowed to send whatever prompts, and you choose which ones you like and stuff? Just want to know.

I don’t have a particular rule set. People can send me whatever they want as long as it’s sfw (like most of the games, rated T) and preferably not a crossover, since those can get complicated - unless it’s PLvsAA or Ghost Trick. In an interview, Takumi implied the latter to be in the same universe as AA, though a crossover with GT is supposedly in consideration (eventually).

I encourage people to come up with the silliest, weirdest, craziest prompts! This ask meme started off as an offshoot of my sporking works on C-R, where some were a little “proddy” for lack of a better word, but unlike that thread, this blog is full fanfic territory. I try to keep them as accurate to the canon and official sources as possible, but I usually have to come up with a lot on my own.

Thanks for asking.

[iq85]

Wie man in Nordirland mit Sicherheit verprügelt wird

In Nordirland verprügelt zu werden, ist leichter getan als gesagt; Nordiren pflegen nämlich die Kunst des „tellying“ und brüsten sich damit, anhand von Körpersprache und Körperbau die Konfession eines Fremden mit einer Wahrscheinlichkeit von bis zu neunzig Prozent zu erkennen.1

Will man sich nicht von Wahrscheinlichkeit und Zufall abhängig machen, sondern zu hundert Prozent sicher gehen, dass man ein paar auf die Schnauze kriegt, kann man folgender Anweisung folgen und wird vom Ergebnis nicht enttäuscht werden.

Will man von Protestanten verprügelt werden...

… muss man nur Katholenhassende „Black Places“ wie die Pubs in der Belfaster Shankill Road aufsuchen und sich den Leuten als Seán, Liam, Pádraoig oder Séamus vorstellen.2 Man trägt dabei ein grün-weiß gestreiftes T-Shirt und eine giftgrüne Schildmütze.3 Weil’s in Belfast immer kalt ist, hängt der Palästinenser-Schal um den Hals,4 und weil man schlecht zu Fuss unterwegs ist, stützt man sich auf einem Hurling-Schläger ab.5

Fragt einen der Barkeeper, wo man herkommt, gibt man „from the six counties“ an.6 Will er's genauer wissen, nennt man „Bandit County, South Armagh.“7 Reicht ihm das immer noch nicht, antwortet man Cullyhanna, „One-Shot-Paddy's“ Heimatort.8 Fragt der Barkeeper, auf welche Schule man dort ging, fängt deren Name immer mit Sankt Irgendwas an. Fragt er, was man dort gelernt hat, lautet die richtige Antwort, dass die irische Zeitrechnung 1916 beginnt.9 Will irgendjemand wissen, warum man in Belfast ist, gibt es nur eine richtige Antwort: „das Duell meiner Lieblingsmannschaften, Donegal Celtic gegen Cliftonville.“10 Fragt einen der Barkeeper, was man von den Rangers hält,11 antwortet man, dass man regelmäßig nach Crossmaglen zu den Spielen geht.12

Daraufhin bestellt man ein Smithwick und fragt den „Pflanzer“,13 ob er nicht im Fernsehen auf Gaelic Football umschalten kann.14 Wird man daraufhin von irgendeinem „Proddy Dog“ dumm angemacht,15 fragt man ganz unschuldig zurück, ob die Person heute mit dem linken Fuss aufgestanden ist.16

Wenn man bis jetzt noch keine auf's Maul bekommen hat, ist nur das sprichwörtliche Glück der Iren Schuld, denn mehr an protestantischer Provokation geht einfach nicht.

Dasselbe Spiel funktioniert genauso gut mit Katholiken, wobei sich...

… der Pub diesmal in der Belfaster Falls Road befindet. Man nennt sich Adam, Andy oder William und trägt ein orange-farbenes T-Shirt zum blau-weiß-roten Regenschirm.17 Zur Zeit befindet man sich in der alten Heimat „Ulster“ zu Besuch,18 weil Glentoran gegen die Crusaders spielt.19 Normalerweise lebt man als „Nipples“ drüben in Schottland und besucht dort regelmä­ßig Glasgow Rangers-Spiele.20

Nachdem man den „Taig“ hinter der Theke mit „Shalom“ begrüßt und sein Strongbow-Bier bestellt hat,21 fragt man den „Fenian“,22 ob er im Fernsehen auf Cricket umschalten kann.23 Man kenne den Sport noch aus seiner Schulzeit.24

Folgt man dieser Anweisung, muss man sich wegen nordirischer „Tellying“-Fähigkeiten keine Gedanken machen  – selbst der unbegabteste Katholik wird zuschlagen.

Dass man deswegen verprügelt wird, ist gut. Früher wurde man für eines der genannten Merkmale umgebracht. Eine Provokation benötigte es nicht. Es reichte bereits, von wo man kommt, auf welche Schule man ging, welche Farben man trug und welche Sportarten und Mannschaften man unterstützte.

Fussnoten

1 Vgl. Kelleher jr. 2006: 12-14

2 Siehe hierzu Kelleher jr. 2006: 46

3 Siehe hierzu Jamieson 2011: 264; vgl. hierzu ebd. 30

4 Vgl. Wood 2006: 23

5 Vgl. Jamieson 2011: 220f.

6 Vgl. Kostian 2008: 16

7 Vgl. Harnden 1999: 11

8 Vgl. Harnden 1999: 86f.; vgl. Horgan 2005: 12f.

9 Vgl. Horgan 2001: 8

10 Vgl. Kyriacou 2014: 17-19; vgl. hierzu Jamieson 2011: 153f.

11 Siehe hierzu Jamieson 2011: 70; vgl. Hierzu kyriacou 2011: 15f.

12 Siehe hierzu Jamieson 2011: 231-236

13 Vgl. Kelleher jr. 2006: 46

14 Vgl. Jamieson 2011: 55f.; vgl. Kyriacou 2014: 7; vgl. hierzu Jamieson 2011: 70-77

15 Vgl. Lovejoy 1999: 16

16 Vgl. Jamieson 2011: 14

17 Vgl. Jamieson 2011: 264

18 Vgl. Kostian 2008: 16

19 Vgl. Jamieson 2011: 70; vgl. Kyriacou 2014: 19f.

20 Vgl. Jamieson 2011: 3; vgl. ebd. 70; vgl. Kyriacou 2011: 15f.

21 Vgl. Jamieson 2011: 4; vgl. Wood 2006: 23; vgl. Rouse 2015: 16-18; vgl. Cottrell 2005: 15-17

22 Vgl. Jamieson 2011: 4

23 Siehe hierzu Rouse 2015: 303

24 Vgl. Kyriacou 2014: 10f.

Literatur

Cottrell, Robert C. (2005): Northern Ireland and England. The Troubles. In: Robert C. Cottrell, George J. Mitchell und James Irving Matray (Hg.): Northern Ireland and England. The troubles. Philadelphia: Chelsea House (Arbitrary borders), S. 1–139.

Harnden, Toby (1999): 'Bandit country'. The IRA & South Armagh London: Hodder & Stoughton.

Horgan, John (2001): Irish media. A critical history since 1922. London, New York: Routledge. Online verfügbar unter http://site.ebrary.com/lib/alltitles/docDetail.action?docID=10053781.

Horgan, John (2005): The psychology of terrorism. London, New York: Frank Cass (Terrorism and political violence).

Jamieson, Teddy (2011): Whose side are you on? Sports, the Troubles and me. London: Yellow Jersey.

Kelleher, William F. (2004): The troubles in Ballybogoin. Memory and identity in Northern Ireland. 1st pbk. ed. Ann Arbor: University of Michigan Press. Online verfügbar unter http://www.jstor.org/stable/10.3998/mpub.16469.

Kostian, Sabine (2008): Der Nordirlandkonflikt. In: Thorsten Bonacker, Rainer Greshoff und Uwe Schimank (Hg.): Sozialtheorien im Vergleich. Der Nordirlandkonflikt als Anwendungsfall. 1. Aufl. Wiesbaden: VS Verlag für Sozialwissenschaften / GWV Fachverlage GmbH Wiesbaden, S. 15–32.

Kyriacou, Lefkos (2014): Football Frontiers: Competition and Conflict in Belfast. Hg. v. The Centre for Urban Conflicts Research, Department of Architecture. University of Cambridge. Belfast (Divided Cities/Contested States Working Paper Series, 30). Online verfügbar unter http://www.conflictincities.org/PDFs/WP30.pdf, zuletzt geprüft am 23.02.2017.

Lovejoy, Joe (1999): Bestie. A portrait of a legend. London: Pan Books.

Rouse, Paul (2015): Sport and Ireland. A history. First edition. Oxford: Oxford University Press. 

 Wood, Ian S. (2010): Crimes of loyalty. A history of the UDA. Edinburgh: Edinburgh University Press. Online verfügbar unter http://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&scope=site&db=nlebk&db=nlabk&AN=163383.