#publisher's weekly please save me and let me talk about this please please

[julianplum]

The absolute weirdest thing about working on picture books (which is my main job, actually!!) is that I am making more art right now than I've ever made in my life and I can't put it anywhere or share it at all!

Which is, on the one hand, frustrating! As an artist on the internet, content output is sort of your lifeblood, and when I post new work, I notably get more traffic to my shop, which is great because making art is the only way I earn money.

On the other hand there's the thing of: art shouldn't be "content output," and there's no inherent worth difference to work shared now vs. later, and I shouldn't be prioritizing my output to match some social media algorithm or some notion I have in my head of what an "active artist" looks like. I'm a working artist, which is a different thing, I think??

The amount of work tee'd up for me this year also means that I'll have to put making new prints and stickers on the backburner for the first time since I started doing this full-time! Again, frustrating because I have a million ideas (snesbians......) and sort of a relief because it means I can step away and come back with only the best ideas having floated to the top. I hope!!

long post, ig, but I have many evolving thoughts and haven't reworked my newsletter enough / decided on a new home for it yet so they end up here. thanks for sticking with me in the secret work period, fam. I promise it'll be worth it when there are shiny books on the other side.

[booksinmythorax]

So, in the midst of... you know, everything, life at the library goes on and I wanted to talk about the difference between Libby and Hoopla.

For those not in the know, Libby and Hoopla are both apps/software that libraries can use to offer digital items to our patrons. Libby does ebooks (including graphic novels) and audiobooks.

Hoopla does ebooks, audiobooks, digital comics (weekly issues, not just trades or graphic novels), movies, TV shows, and music.

A little while back, my library system had to cut down on the number of Hoopla items patrons can check out per month. This caused a little bit of a stir - people like Hoopla! And they should! It's really cool! But the reason we had to cut back there and not with Libby was because the ways we pay for Libby and Hoopla are different.

Libby uses a pay-per-license model. This means that when we buy an ebook or audiobook on Libby, it's like we're buying one copy of a physical item. Except, because publishers are vultures, it's often much more expensive than buying one copy of the physical book - unless it's an audiobook, in which case buying the CDs might very well be more expensive than buying the digital license on Libby. That's why you might have to wait on a list for a Libby title that's really popular: we only have licenses for so many "copies". These licenses can be in perpetuity (i.e. you pay once and you can use that copy forever) or, more commonly, for a limited length of time like a year. Once that time is up, we decide whether to pay for the license for each copy again.

Hoopla uses a pay-per-circulation model. There's no waiting: once you, the patron, decide you'd like to check something out, you can do so immediately and we pay Hoopla a smaller amount of money to essentially "rent" the license from them. Cool, right?

Except that the pay-per-circ model adds up. If we have access to a brand new or popular title on Libby and Hoopla, and the Libby copy has a long waiting list, patrons might hop over to Hoopla to check it out immediately. If enough people do this, we might end up paying more overall for the Hoopla item on a per-circulation basis than we did for the license on the Libby item. That's why libraries typically limit the number of Hoopla checkouts patrons can use per month: because otherwise, we can't predict the amount we'll be paying Hoopla in the same way we can predict the amount we'll pay Libby.

Let me be clear: If a library offers a digital service and it would be helpful to you, please use it. Don't deny yourself a service you need or would enjoy in some misguided attempt to save your library some cash. We want to offer digital services, not least because ebooks and audiobooks have accessibility features that print books often don't. If your library has Libby and Hoopla and you get utility out of both, use both!

That said, if you're upset with the lower number of checkouts on Hoopla or the limited number of titles or copies available to you on Libby, you know who you should talk to? Your elected officials. Local, state, and federal. Because those folks are the ones who decide how much money we get, and what we can spend it on.

Don't go to them angry, either, because then we'll get scolded for not using the funds they "gave" us appropriately. (If you're a frequent library user, you might be shocked at how anti-library many local government officials already are.) Write your officials an email, call them, or show up at a board meeting and say you like the services the library offers, but you'd love it if we had enough money to buy more books on Libby or offer more checkouts on Hoopla. Tell them directly that this is how you would like your tax dollars to be spent.

If anybody has questions about how Hoopla or Libby work, I'm happy to answer them! Just wanted to make sure we had a baseline understanding.

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

By: Ryan Burge

Published: May 7, 2023

I was born and raised Southern Baptist. Gave my life to Jesus at 15. Got baptized in a pair of white pajamas. Then, I went to a Free Methodist college. Got a job at an American Baptist Church and have been serving in the ABCUSA for more than twenty years. I will be elected to the Board of General Ministries for American Baptist denomination this summer.

My wife is Irish Catholic. We got married in St. Teresa of Avila in our hometown. My very Southern Baptist grandmother went to her grave not knowing that piece of information.

Both my boys have been raised in the Catholic church. They were baptized as infants, and both have had their First Communions. They go to PSR classes nearly every Sunday morning before coming to worship at my church. And our sons attend Wednesday night youth group at the local United Methodist Church.

We wanted them to be part of a religious community. They are active in three. I hope that one of those sticks.

I try to get to Mass with my family a few times a year. Usually on Holy Days of Obligation, and other important days like Ash Wednesday. I really do like a lot of aspects of the Catholic Church. They certainly have better architecture than the average non-denominational Protestant building. Plus, I don’t have to do anything when I go to Mass. I can just sit there and meditate on the scriptures and get lost in the rituals.

I think one of the reasons I like going to Mass is that it gives me something to compare my own church to. We worship the same God, are saved by the same Jesus, and read (mostly) the same Bible.

From a data standpoint, however, there’s a lot going on in the Catholic Church that’s worth unpacking.

But before we dig into that - let’s just start as broad as we can: What share of Americans identify as Catholic and has that changed over time?

The General Social Survey has been asking about religious affiliation for nearly five decades. Same question, basically the same response options. The results are pretty boring, to be honest. Between 1972 and 1990, the share of Americans who identify as Catholic did not budge - 26%. From 1990 through 2010, it barely shifted as well - maybe dropping a single percentage point.

But, from 2010 through 2021, the trend line begins to move. It’s pretty evident that the Catholic share has dropped below 25%. However, it’s hard to pinpoint the exact percentage. In both 2016 and 2018, the number was 23% and in 2021 it dropped to 21%. But that last figure may be impacted by a methodological issue that I discuss at length��here.

Overall, though, that’s a pretty solid result. I’ve shared this graph in a few talks that I have given with Catholics in the audience, and they seem fairly pleased with this result. I mean, I don’t blame them. Between 1972 and 2010, the Catholic share dropped by a single percentage point. Not bad.

However, that’s not the entire story with American Catholicism. Not even close. Lots of Americans still identify as Catholics but how many of them actually come to a Mass on a regular basis? That’s where the narrative about the Catholic Church in the United States starts to change.

I calculated the share of four Christian groups that report attending services nearly every week or more over the last fifty years. I love a graph like this one because the point I am trying to make becomes crystal clear in the visualization: Mass attendance for Catholics has fallen off a cliff.

In the early 1970s, about half of Catholics were weekly attenders. Today, it’s about 25%. And no, that’s not a result of the pandemic. Attendance was already down to 26% in 2018 - long before the world had ever heard the word “COVID-19.”

Note, also that the share of evangelicals who attend weekly has noticeably risen over the last fifty years (up at least a dozen percentage points). Weekly attendance for both Black and Mainline Protestants has stayed relatively stable, as well.

I think what is happening in the latter two cases, at least, is that people who marginally attended decades ago now no longer identify as Protestant. That means the denominator has gotten smaller and only the truly committed are left in the fold. It isn’t a resurgence, it’s probably more like a concentration.

The burning question here is: why have Catholics seen their attendance decline so precipitously? There could be a million and one reasons for Catholic churches to be emptying out, just like their Protestant cousins. But I wanted to focus on just one today: politics. I am a political scientist, after all.

I calculated weekly attendance rates among Catholics, but I broke it down by political partisanship. I was hoping to see some type of narrative emerge. It’s surprising to note that even through the mid-1990s, a Catholic Democrat was just as likely to attend weekly Mass as a Republican Catholic.

The clear partisan gap in Mass attendance only began to open up around the election of George W. Bush. But the divide was a small one: only three percentage points. It’s continued to widen from there, though. From about 2010 onward, a Republican Catholic is about six percentage points more likely to attend Mass nearly every week compared to a Catholic Democrat.

That’s not what I would call a huge divide. And if you don’t focus on the gap and instead look at the trend line - Mass attendance among Republicans has dropped from 55%+ to below 30% now. It’s not like conservatives are holding the line while liberal Catholics are jumping ship in huge numbers.

I wanted to take one more look at this, so I pulled up the Cooperative Election Study to test a working hypothesis. Maybe the devout White Catholics are becoming more Republican, while the ones who never darken the church doors are moving more toward the Democrats. I was surprised with the result, to say the least.

First, look at the right-hand side of the graph. Among weekly attending White Catholics, there is little to report. In 2008, 57% were Republicans. In 2022, it was 59%. Certainly, no big shift there - just a lot of stability over the last fourteen years.

Now, look at the never or seldom Mass attenders. This is where things get very interesting. In 2008 and 2012, it’s pretty clear that this group was a point of strength for the Democrats. However, between 2012 and 2016 some pretty tectonic shifts were underway. Instead of the distribution being +15 for the Democrats, it now becomes an even mix (around 42% for both parties).

From that point forward, the composition of low attending White Catholics continued to tilt to the right. Look at 2022 - it’s basically a mirror image of 2008. Democrats were 50% - Republicans were 35% in 2008. Now they are the exact opposite of that.

I am not one to write myself out of a job - but it’s pretty hard to make a causal argument that theology is what pushed low attending White Catholics toward the GOP - because they weren’t in the pews to hear those arguments from the priests and bishops.

For now I will leave you with this thought: shouldn’t White people who report their religious attendance as seldom or never have the same view of politics regardless of how they answer a question about religious identity? You can probably guess that a non-attending Catholic is a bit distinct from a non-attending agnostic. I will explore just how big that divide is in a future post.

[ Via: https://archive.md/SPWF7 ]

==

More Good News.

[ninhaoma-ya]

Chapter 1082 — Let’s go and claim it!

It’s getting annoying with how people don’t respect the publishing schedule at all with respects to the leaks. Spoilers have been out for over a week already when the official release is this incoming Sunday. I had to double check on Shueisha, and yes, 1082 is out on the 7th.

It’s like… you’ll still have to wait for the next chapters, y’know? There will be a break at some point, so why not just accept the pace we’re going at?

Oh well, I digress.

On to what you’re here for!

(A word of warning: this will be a jumpy analysis.)

What a horrible way to start the chapter :(

Although a minor side-bob, I really liked T-Bone. And yes, that’s why Oda killed him off: to show how well the Cross Guild’s plan is working, pitting civilians and pirates alike against the marines.

Although only some enlightened marines see it. Others are wilfully blind.

I wonder, Sengoku, I really do. The name Ohara doesn’t ring a bell? Flevance? Alabasta? Dressrosa? All the people on Sabaody sold in the human shops? The people in the Blues, extorted by worms like Nezumi? Egghead, a governmental island that’s going to be blown to kingdoms come as soon as Kizaru gets there?

Tsuru is truly a great strategist, able to see all sides, although she loses some points for still condemning the culprit…

…through whose eyes we see the devastation.

And Buggy is such a great showman! He does know how to get his people roaring..

..except for his oldest and dearest who are happy to listen to him being tortured.

Shame. Shame on you.

(This is totally on you, Mihawk and Crocodile. You saw what the devotion of his fans did to the Cross Guild poster and yet you let them create the ship?)

The ship is beautiful. I wonder what it’s called.

And now we learn about the importance of communication, boys and girls:

Shanks: Why don’t you share your reasoning with your old friend Buggy?

Buggy: Why do you assume Shanks wanted you to become a subordinate when he said “join me”? And why don’t you talk with Shanks about your and his dreams and see if you can find some common ground, instead of burying your own dreams because you thought someone else had a better shot at achieving them?

I really like Buggy vocalising his dream.

And the strategic genius of rallying the troops.

Yes, almost all pirates we’ve seen have been touched by Roger and the dream of the One Piece one way or another. It’s a great move to remind them of it — now they’re part of your crew and you, Great Chairman Buggy, obviously have a chance.

And rallying the troops keeps your bosses from killing you.

And, of course, the sheer romanticism of Buggy. He still believes, deep within, doesn’t he?

And the second part – it's nice to get some new faces and Koala my beloved, but:

WHAT HAPPENED? PLEASE, FINALLY TELL US!

I assume we’ll be going back to Egghead next chapter since we’ve been gone for quite a while and thus Sabo’s revelation will be left a cliffhanger for the upcoming year or so.

Such is story pacing and weekly cycles.

But then.

Oda’s line art.

It’s getting worse and worse. I really hope they finally convince him to let an assistant take over the inking, because this is not good.

Sure, the assistant-drawn neat backgrounds save a lot, such as in the above Tsuru/Sengoku-panel, but One Piece is still a character-focused story, with a lot of personal close-ups. And Oda’s lack of time (and probably weakening eyesight and increasing age) is showing so clearly.

There are so many who would love to help Oda create this masterpiece. Please, let them help.

Transport chapter, but I give it a dream come true and a wish upon a star.

[alittlelife]

The Average Fourth Grader Is a Better Poet Than You (and Me Too) by Hannah Gamble. Published March 5th, 2013

While in graduate school at the University of Houston, I supplemented my income by working as a writer in residence for Writers in the Schools (WITS). I was with WITS for three years, during which I visited third, fourth, and fifth grade classrooms, and worked with groups of students visiting the Menil museum of art, the Houston Historical Society, and the Houston Arboretum.

When first hired by WITS, I expected that working to explain some of my favorite poems to fourth graders would result in me becoming a better teacher of poetry. What I wasn't expecting was that (thanks to having my brain blown apart on a weekly basis as I browsed my students' folders of barely legible poems) I would become a better poet.

Here are some lines written by students in grades 3rd-6th:

"The life of my heart is crimson.”

[Writing about a family member's recent death:]

"My brother went down/ to the river and put dirt on.” "Peace be a song, silver pool of sadness” "Away went a dull winter wind that rocked harshly, and bent you said, 'Father, father'.”

[Writing about a terminal illness:]

"I am feeling burdened and I taste milk…… I mumble, ‘Please, please run away.’ But it lives where I live.” "The owls of midnight hoot like me shutting the door to nothing.”

[Writing about life as a movie:]

"The choir enters, and the director screams 'Sing with more terror!!!'”

"I have provisions. Binary muffins. It's an in/out/in/out kind of universe. We cannot help you, this is a universe factory. A sound of rolling symbols. Disappearing rocks, screams of lizards. Sanity must prevail. Save vs. Do Not."

"I, the star god, take bones from the underworlds of past times to create mankind.”

These young writers are addressing subjects that still obsess poets fifty years older: sadness, death, love, responsibility, aging, family, loneliness, and refuge…and they are addressing these subjects in language that is new, and thus has the power to emotionally effect a well-seasoned (/jaded) reader. The average fourth grader is able to do this because she hasn't been alive long enough to know how to do it (and by “it” I mean talk about the world) any other way.

Story time: When I was a child I believed that one day I might be allowed to cross into an alternate dimension by walking through a quilt hanging on my living room wall. As I got older I stopped believing that this was a possibility—not because I grew to believe that the universe was not an extremely strange place where incomprehensible things could happen on a daily basis, but because I passed year after year after year not being able to enter the spirit realm through a wallhanging.

Anecdote that I hope you'll find relevant: When Jean Piaget began studying the intellectual processes of children, he was not doing so because he had any special interest in children. Piaget was interested, rather, in the intellectual processes of (adult) humans and was seeking a control group. [His first thought was that the best control group would be comprised of martians but, as he did not have access to martians, he decided to use children since children possessed what is farthest from human consciousness.]

So let's look at what happens to our young writers as they age [I took these lines from poems written by middle-school/ high school students (Italics, mine)]:

Snacking on this and that my friends and I keep the party going even when it is over”

"Whispers of a secret crush being unraveled”

"I’m trapped in this hole that I can’t break through”

"Barack Obama in the White House. I can feel the inspiration Can you feel it?”

"Now I feel secure with my head held high.

Sad times. By middle school/high school, the average student has learned how normal people talk. The resulting language is underwhelming and predictable—the safe regurgitations of a thoroughly socialized consciousness.

While the average older student's poems are heavy with allegiance to a limited view of reality, the average younger writer's vision of the world is nimble and surprising—bizarre, yet true.

Last year I spent every Saturday tutoring an extremely undersocialized kid in vocab. When I taught her the word blandishments (���to flatter, coax, sweet-talk, appeal to”) she wrote this sentence: “The blandishments of the sugar flowers made the cake so much more inviting.”

The sentence is interesting because the student understood that a blandishment is something that attracts favorable attention without fully realizing that people almost always use the word to refer to a human action.

The poet’s job is to forget how people do it.

[thatgirlwritingficsatnight]

Odi et Amo II

Odi et amo. Quare id faciam fortasse requiris? nescio, sed fieri sentio et excrucior  

Catullus, 85

After a few years of working in the USA for Disney and playing the role of The White Fox in Marvel Cinematic Universe you came back to your motherland - Korea only to be greeted with hatred and contempt. To make things harder for you the universe sends you the most irritating neighbour ™. Will you be able to find your happiness and  accomplish your dream of becoming loved actress in Korea without complying with standards of patriarchal society?

pairing: Park Jinyoung x reader

genre: actor au

warnings: angst, foul language (please don’t read it if you’re not old enough)

words: 5764

A/N: It was supposed to be published last week, but I was unhappy with it and ended up rewriting it/adding some things. Sorry! (*_ _)人 P.S Sorry for my grammatical errors! Enjoy!

Chapter I

***

Currently sitting in front of your manager you eyed him. He seemed tired and you felt a pang of conscience it was probably because of your tweets last night and you wouldn’t even think of meeting him if you weren’t in dire need of getaway from the uncomfortable conversation with your neighbor. You didn’t meet in your agency’s building since both of you despised the place even though it was a new and flashy building made out of something that looked like a white marble. Both of you agreed on meeting outside it, so you were sitting in the café nearby while wondering how did your shitty boss manage to rent it. Last time you’ve been here, it was a few rooms in shabby, old building. You shivered while imagining going in, that place had an evil aura even from across the street.

"Where did you get all that money to rent it?" you asked.

"We actually bought it." 

"Well, business goes well then."

"Actually we are only able thanks to your movies. Don’t tell Kim Pd-nim I told you, he thinks you'll become arrogant."

"I already am." You smiled coldly.

"That's what I told him."

Your manager had a sarcastic smirk on. Both of you and hated your CEO and even mentioning him would bring up unpleasant memories. Kim Sanghoon was one of those bosses who wouldn't even think about trying to help idols and stars that were bringing him money. No matter what it was — crazy fans destroying your life, death threats, your collapsing mental health he didn’t care. Once you were attacked by media and netizens you were on your own and if it was too much for the company your contract was terminated. You often wondered when would you become too much for them to handle.

"How do you feel?" Your manager caught you off guard, even though you had known each other for a long time there was an unspoken rule between you not to talk about other things than work.

"Honesty..I'm fine I don't understand why everyone asks me that." You huffed a bit irritated and run fingers through your hair. 

"Well it's just.. I know it was important to you and you worked hard to earn the hearts of your Korean fa..."

"I'm fine." you didn't manage to hide irritation in your voice. You were not used to talking about it and you didn't like it one bit. Besides what were you supposed to say anyway? No one else was as hated as you. Of course there were idols and stars that were occasionally criticized but not one of them was constantly a target of such hatred. Even when you left there were still death threats send from your motherland to you, nothing changed. Not to mention no one else got such welcoming on the day of return to their home. It was unfair, stupid, infuriating and saddening. And yet you couldn’t understand what people were expecting of you? Both Mark and your manager knew you, or so you thought. What were you supposed to do? Cry? You wouldn't cry, that was what weak people do, that would show you actually care about what those assholes think about you. You were just fine. Ok. Neither sad nor happy. You'd endure whatever you had to but you won't conform to their image of idol and woman nor will you show any sign of weakness. You'd rather stay hated than do that. Your manager sighed and it pulled you out of your thoughts.

"Well then. If you're okay then I'm glad. So just as I told you I have this drama for you if you're interested." You weren't the slightest bit. Frankly you'd rather stay in bed for the next three months jobless than play some crazy villain or villainous second female lead. Then again you felt bad about the amount of work he probably had because of you. You looked him in the eyes and answered with a sigh.

"I can't promise anything but I can at least listen what it’s about.." Your manager seemed surprised, but he didn't wait long, perhaps in case you'd change your mind. He took out some papers and handed them to you. You cringed on the sole title "Love is your destiny" — it sounded sappy. 

"So it's a love story between fallen angel and this human..." he started.

"Angels...so who do they want me to play? Satan? Devil? Succubus?" You browsed through pages to find the villain.

"You'd know if you'd let me finish." You sent him a small apologetic smile. "They want you to play the main role." You stared at him confused before you burst with laughter.

"They want me to play cute girl in love with the angel?" The idea of you playing the sweet female lead was absurd, not that you weren’t able to do it, you were a good actress it wouldn’t be a problem for you, if anything it would most likely be a challenge for the audience.

"No, no! You'd play the angel. See this is drama with strong female lead. The origin of your character is fascinating. You had to watch the mistreatment of a woman extremely devoted to god. The lady prayed, but she still got beaten, almost killed even. Moreover, you had to be the guardian angel of her torturer — the aggressive husband. You pleaded to god, you asked him to let you guard her instead, but he didn’t agree and forbade you from intervening. One night when the husband got drunk, he beat her unconscious and you were sure he’d kill her. You decided to save her, you kill her husband and this is the moment when you fell. That's when you became deviant and promised yourself you'd help those who were denied it. You’d protect them and avenge them. Fast-forward a thousand years, and we are in Seoul and you meet a man, a painter..." He was so excited you almost didn't understand some words because of the speed. He was waiting for your response but you were too occupied with reading what he handed you. Once you finished it you looked at him with a mix of surprise and excitement.

"It's like it was made for me.." you said with bewildered tone.

"That's because it was made for you. The screenwriter wrote it with you in mind." You looked like a cartoon character, eyes wide, mouth in a shape of letter "o", once you heard him.

"Me?"

"Yes. She is apparently a big fan."

"And tvN is ok with that?" You furrowed your brows confused.

"Perhaps they aren't. But it is co-production with Netflix, and they pushed for you since you’re popular worldwide." 

Your heart fluttered and the tips of your fingers tingled from excitement as you rummaged through the pages once again, not only it would be showed in TV during the prime-time but also streamed on Netflix weekly.

"The screenwriter and producer kept calling me since yesterday as soon as it was known you came back. They almost cast someone else. They were sure you're staying in the USA. Isn't it amazing?" He was as excited as you were and you felt some remorse for being so rude to him before. You gave him your warmest smile, one you usually used only around Mark and your family.

"It really is. Thank you and I'm sorry for being rude earlier." He was clearly uncomfortable with your apology, red spreading on his cheeks as he waved his hand dismissively.

"Ah don't mention it. Does that mean I can call them and say you are interested." You looked at the pages in front of you once again and smiled broadly before simply saying.

"Yes!"

Jinyoung was still amused you threatened him in his own café. He couldn't focus on the book he had in his hands anymore as he chuckled replying your angered and irritated expressions in his head. It was fun to tease you because you reacted so well. He could tell you could be great friends if you'd let him. He smiled to himself mouthing your own words "bloody Y/N". He was truly shocked that he met you here of all places and found it rather amusing when you yelled in English and caught his attention. He felt some disappointment upon seeing a half naked man talking to you from the screen of your phone but the feeling disappeared as quickly as it came up once your friend ended the call. Jinyoung wouldn't call himself a noisy person, but he found you interesting, and he wanted to know who it was and what kind of relationship you had although he rarely cared for stuff like this... His thoughts were interrupted by his ring-tone, BamBam's face illuminated the screen. He sighed but answered it anyway.

"Skrrrt, skrrt!"

"Ah yes, good morning to you to Bam." Jinyoung said in amused tone.

"Oh, hyung you seem in good mood. What you're up to?"

"Reading, thinking."

"Sounds boring wanna hang out?"

"Actually I wanted to ask you about something." Jinyoung ignored his question once he remembered how obsessed with celebrities and their styles Bam was.

"Shoot."

"Do you know any celebrities under the name Y/N." BamBam laughed wholeheartedly.

"That's very funny hyung."

"What do you mean?"

"OMG you're not joking! Are you living under a rock, hyung? Y/N is like the hottest actress ever. Her style is chic and comfy and artsy it's really cool, and she actually doesn't have a stylist, she does it on her ow..."

"She is an actress?"

"She is the actress! She played the White Fox in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Lol, you call yourself an actor and you don't know the most popular Korean actress abroad."

"You know I don't like those superheroes movies. Besides why didn't I hear about her Korean career if she's so good?"

"You are so old it scares me sometimes. Well you should know her from internet. I think it's national sport to hate her or something. She just came back, and they're already frying her online not to mention the media and dating rumors."

"Dating rumors?"

"Yeah she dated few actors. I think Seojoon hyung dated her and Changwook hyung even almost proposed. The media made her to look like heartless vixen though. I mean they never liked her but her last ex gave a very unfavorable interview to dispatch and after that she became villain number one. She left shortly after."

"Mmmm... I see." Jinyoung only started his career four years ago so it shouldn't be weird you've never met before. He was also the type of person who couldn't care less about internet gossip and gutter press or dispatch. He sighed. Suddenly your angry reaction made much more sense and Jinyoung didn't feel as good about it as he did before. He scolded himself for being too frivolous and selfish. He just wanted to see your reactions - it was cute and funny...

"Why did you ask? OMG you've met her didn't you. I'm so jealous. What was she wearing? Was it Gucci? I heard she likes it."

"Ok Bam. I have to go. Thanks for the talk."

"Wait, so you wanna hang out?"

"Last time when you asked me to hang out I had to shop for 4 hours with you."

"Well... I am your stylist. Besides, it was fun, come on." 

"I think we have different definitions of "fun""

You woke up to no noise pleasantly surprised. It seems that Sunday's were free from renovation and thanks to that you could sleep in. You stretched out and grabbed the phone to check the time. It was already past eleven. You smiled to yourself and fell to bed lazily. Soon you wouldn't have time for lazy days like this as the production team was supposed to finish up casting for the drama by the end of the next week. You thought about picking some groceries, maybe cooking yourself some food and enjoying the day with a book or perhaps some video games. You took shower and put on some comfortable clothes — beige cardigan you stole from Mark clearly too big for you and some black trousers pairing it up with brown coat. You left the apartment and as soon as you did the irritating voice in your head reminded you about your debt. Hesitant at first you shook off the feeling quickly and knocked on the door. This time you were prepared for teasing, you were expecting it even so you wouldn't be caught off guard. At least that's what you were telling yourself. Your neighbor, however, didn't act the way you expected him to. Instead of smirking at you and teasing you or straight up mocking you, he seemed nervous. He had deep purple bags under his usually sparkling eyes. Perhaps he didn’t feel well... you wondered whether you should ask him if he needed some help. You decided it would be extremely awkward and so you cleared your throat and spoke up — softness now somewhere in your voice.

"Is that bad time? I can come later I just wanted to give you back your money.."

"N-No." He started nervously "I mean no. It's fine. I'm actually glad you're here. Would you come in?"

You didn't want to come in and it must have shown on your face since he continued.

"Come on. I don't bite." He smiled warmly and it seemed much more normal than the timid self he showed you seconds ago. And so you came in curiously looking around his own apartment. It was a mirror image of your own in terms of room placements — a hallway leading to living room with opened kitchen. You came into the living room and Jinyoung rushed after you quickly turning the TV off. You didn't pay it any mind since you were looking around and taking in how different was his home compared to yours. It was very modern and yet it kept the homey feeling. Yours on the other hand, well it was raw yet full of stuff? Mark would probably call it unfinished and cluttered. Your neighbor sat on the other side of the couch leaving quite a lot of space between the two of you and run a hand through his hair. He wore a cardigan very similar to yours both in color and style in fact it could be the very same brand and style it’s just neither of you noticed it.

"So what did you want to talk about?"

"I wanted to apologize." He responded quickly and gained a surprised look from you.

"Apologize?"

"Yes about yesterday…I shouldn't have said those things in public I could say I just didn't know about your situation but it’s no excuse. I’m truly sorry." he paused. "You don't have to be stressed about press or rumors though. It is my café and my staff, so they won't talk about it with anyone I took care of it." You took back everything you said, you weren’t prepared for meeting him, especially not getting apologies from him. On top of that he was the owner of your favorite café...

"I… it's fine." You said confused and tried to act as normal as possible while being very aware of your palms spread on your thighs. They were unnaturally clammy. It was a surprise to you, you rarely got any apologies and you were expecting some more teasing not something like that. Your eyes were everywhere except on him and you were screaming at yourself internally to say something, anything, but nothing was coming to your mind. Once again you lost your ability for forming witty sentences around him or in that case any sentences. There was awkward silence between you and you immensely regretted coming to see him today. You weren’t used to this. Somewhere in your belly you could feel as if butterflies - or rather moths — yes, moths of anxiety were fluttering their wings desperately trying to get into your chest. You never felt like this before. You tried to avoid looking at him but your own eyes betrayed you and fell on Jinyoung only to find out he was enjoying your anguish. His brown eyes were glimmering and his lips formed half smirk that he tried to cover with his left hand in a gesture of propping his head up. Immediately irritation came to you burning all the fluttering wings in the pits of your stomach. A frown formed on your face and you send him a glare. Wondering how could you be so stupid and fall for his act.

"You're really cute when you're shy or embarrassed." He chuckled now mocking you openly.

"I can't believe I took your apologies as sincere." He chuckled again clearly pleased with how you responded.

"They were sincere. I just enjoy teasing you."

"Could you stop? That's inappropriate you don't even know me."

"What do you mean we are neighbors and soon to be friends." He smiled broadly and for a second your mind travelled somewhere else simply admiring his beauty. You cursed his handsome face it could blind and charm everyone really. You wanted to leave, no you needed to leave. It was stuffy in here.

"I'm here for a reason." You reminded him, he was watching you with amusement. It felt almost as if a cat was observing you.

"Ah right... money." his tone seemed inattentive somehow. "I don't need it. Let's say it was a part of my apology."

"Just give me your account number and take the money."

"I don't remember it." You were getting more irritated every minute you talked to him.

"You don't remember your account number?" This man was unbelievable. He shrugged.

"You can send it to me through KakaoTalk if you really want." He smiled and took out the phone from the pocket of his pants. 

"Fine. Just give it." Not wanting to spend any second longer here with him, you scanned his qr to add him quickly and transferred the money.

"Done. Now if you excuse me."

"Of course." He smiled again and you felt mocked by the sole action of his lips shooting upwards. He walked you to the door and watched as you slipped on your shoes. You tried to look as cold and dignified as possible but still tripped over the doorstep. He caught your arm firmly and straightened you. Your heart was beating so fast and hard all you could hear was blood pumping in your ears in fact you were sure he could hear it as well. On the other hand whose heart wouldn't when you almost fell face first, right…? Right? It surely wasn't because of his warm breath now tickling the crown of your head, nor the dangerously beautiful eyes... you absolutely regretted coming here today. It was foolish of you to think your cursed neighbor wouldn't shake you up today. And he was still holding you — how awkward is that; and you felt fine with being hold like that — what on earth was wrong with you? You started to think that maybe it would be better if you'd actually fell and hit that stupid head of yours.

Jinyoung was having very dangerous thoughts. The kind he didn't have in a very long time. He wasn't prepared for this kind of proximity. He was already shaken up yesterday by your touch and closeness he only held your hand for a second or two. Maybe he didn't show it but he was. Honestly he wasn't even into PDA or flirting with someone or even thinking of flirting with someone. Yes, he liked teasing, and he teased you but it was in a FRIENDLY manner. Well it was safe to say he didn't have friendshippy type of thoughts right now. Jinyoung reacted automatically upon seeing you fall he just grabbed your arm and pulled you his way. He was still holding your now tensed muscles, but he couldn't let go of you. He was in trance. Your warmth radiating onto him, the way the smell of your shampoo was tingling his nose, your huge doe-like shocked eyes, parted lips, soft pink on the apples of your cheeks. He was wondering how badly would you kill him if he asked to kiss you right now. He was seriously considering it worthy asking even if you were to pull out his tongue like you threatened yesterday. He didn't ask though, the rational part of his brain finally letting go of you. His own feeling were mess, but he did what he knew best — he masked his emotional disarray with some more teasing hoping you wouldn’t notice.

"Falling for me already?" He smirked even though internally he was screaming and already thinking of confiding in Jackson to get himself calmed. He was clearly the one falling and he was panicked. You rolled your eyes on him seemingly gaining the composure while he was getting stunned even by such simple gesture like this.

"You're way below my standards." You seemed annoyed. He smiled again although he wanted you to leave quickly and leave him alone with his feelings, so he can sort this out. Your eyes narrowed at him even more.

"I need to go now."

"Well, have a great day."

"Right, you too." You were so cold Jinyoung almost chuckled at it because it almost wounded him, and yet he liked it. He enjoyed teasing you too much. You were already walking to the elevator, but he couldn't help himself.

"Oh, and try not to fall when I'm not around to catch you, Y/N." He laughed and you were already frowning at him absolutely mad which made his heart skip a beat, you were really too cute when you frowned. Jinyoung closed the door before you could say anything or worse before he did. He realized he was in deep shit. He tried to think reasonably. He probably just had a crush because he spent a whole night watching movies and dramas you were starring in, he might have also accidentally watched all of your interviews and went to sleep at 6 still smiling to himself from that interview where you had to answer questions about your body in preparation for your role in that Marvel movie. The reporter wouldn't stop asking about your body and making comments on it even though you were clearly uninterested in the topic which you finally cut with your own questions. "Are you looking for some weight loss tips? You look great. Seriously what is it about? Are you trying to fit in my suit?" The last question was asked with whole whisper theatrics and Jinyoung laughed at loud at five am hoping he didn't wake you up through the wall. The suit in question was extremely fitting white leather catsuit. It wasn't the only interview in which you showed off your wits, eloquence and badassness, or how Bam would call it "swag". You were also the most attractive actress he had seen. Of course, you were also attractive when you weren't acting but on the screen... you were amazing. So Jinyoung tried to calm himself down rationalizing his earlier thoughts as simply being starstrucked. That’s what fans felt towards their idols, he was simply charmed by his own new idol. Yes that was it — that’s exactly the type of thoughts some fanboys or fangirls would have. He called Jackson anyway, he knew the designer was the right person to talk to in situations like this. 

Twenty minutes later Jinyoung regretted ever calling his best friend.

"OH MY GOD YOU ARE SO IN LOVE WITH HER!" Jackson basically yelled to the phone. Jinyoung groaned and massaged the space between his brows. 

"Were you even listening? I'm just a big fan."

"Yeah, sure. Whatever helps you sleep at night man. I’m a big fan of Christian Dior and all I can think of is making out with him." 

"Don’t compare it, he is dead!" Jinyoung yelled and his friend filled his ear in response.

 You were regretting not taking the car for shopping. The walk did help with your racing heart, and helped ease off your mind but it turned out the supermarket isn't that close any more when you have to drag home ten bags of food and products. Thankfully a convenience store was on your way so you could make a stop there maybe you'd be lucky enough to see Seoyun, buy her coffee and have a chat. You knew it was stupid, because she could've just feel obliged to say she is your fan but you still wanted to tell her about your new upcoming role. Sadly she wasn't there and so you just made a stop and sat on one of nearby benches. Massaging your palms that had those harsh red lines imprinted in them now thanks to the bags. You could swear you heard the sound of released shutter and so now alarmed you looked around but it seemed you were the only person here. You sighed, how paranoid have you become that you started hearing the cameras when there was none. Then again you were extremely lucky dispatch and paparazzi haven't found you yet. Just before you left to the USA, your ex gave this interview and your life became hell. You didn't have a day without paparazzi running after you or spying on you. The memories came to you not without acrimony and hurt. Your ex, an actor just like you, used you to create scandal and gain some popularity. You could remember how enraged and morose it made you. You didn't date anyone since then even when Mark tried to introduce you to some people. You intended on staying that way. You didn't need anyone, you had Mark, and he was enough for you. Just you and your best friend. You weren't sure how long you stayed like this, deep in your thoughts. You moved only after you fingers became stiff from cold. Somehow you managed to carry the groceries back home. You were so tired that you just counted it as your training today. You checked the time and it was one PM, perfect time to call your bestie.

"Markiee!!" You whined as soon as his face appeared on your screen.

"Y/N-ah. I miss you." He was wearing some blue hoodie this time.

"That's my line. Do you have time to talk?"

"Bruh, for you? Always. What's up?" 

"I am going to star in a drama!"

"What? I thought you hate those." He was genuinely shocked.

"I know, I do. But this one is different. I'm not playing the villain I got female lead, and she isn't some damsel in distress she is a badass character!" You almost screamed and he chuckled.

"Woah. Someone's excited. I'm so proud of you. So who is getting the privilege to be cast with you?"

"I don't know yet. I'm supposed to meet the cast next week." He nodded his head and smiled. "Anyway what are you up to?"

"I was actually thinking of playing Among Us and streaming wanna join?" He grinned.

"Absolutely, prepare to get wrecked Tuan." You used to play together at least once a week when you were in the USA, his fans loved you and shipped you even though you both told them you were just friends — it is some rule in the internet though, to ship close friends.

Few hours later you were once again killed as the first person, this time by Mark.

"YOU GONNA REGRET IT WHEN WE’LL MEET TUAN. I SWEAR I’M GONNA WHOOP YO ASS..." You screamed on top of your lungs and Mark laughed wholeheartedly, while his chat filled up with hundreds of LOL’s and LUL’s.

"You guys she threatens me. Someone make a clip and send it to the police once they find my dead body." He kept laughing and you couldn’t help but laugh as well. His smile and laugh were just too contagious.

"You really put our friendship to test lately Tuan, here I was foolishly trusting you when you killed me in cold blood. " You stretched and your stomach rumbled reminding you that you haven’t eaten yet and it was already around four pm.

" Hey don’t hate the player, hate the game. "   He shrugged and winked, while you rolled your eyes.

"Okay Mark, I gotta go and eat. It’s already afternoon here."

"Sure, chat say bye to Y/N." They did as he asked and it was soon filled with many hearts and goodbyes. "Love you Y/N! Call me soon." He grinned and you smiled warmly.

"Love you too Mark. Bye guys!" With that you logged off the discord, and switched off his stream. You make your way to the kitchen and took out the ingredients for kimchi jjigae you bought before. You carefully read the recipe opened on your phone and began cooking. You had to make anchovy stock first so you grabbed some dried anchovies, kelp and slashed the daikon in cubicles — it looked quite awkward as each cubicle was different size but hey it was you eating it not some kind of culinary critic. You added water and left it to boil deciding to take care of the rest of ingredients. You cut some kimchi and ate some as a snack and reward for not ordering food today, sliced some green onions, cut the pork and the tofu as well. By the time you were done it was time to strain the broth and add the rest of ingredients. It had to cook so you decided to watch some TV in the meantime. You turned it on, it was some kind of reality show where idols were supposed to camp in the wild for a few days. The idols clearly didn’t feel like being there and the fact you knew neither of them didn’t help. You dozed off before you noticed, your eyelids getting as heavy as iron. The smell of burning woke you up. You shot upwards from your couch and rushed to the kitchen, bumping into a coffee table on your way there.

"FFFFFF-UUCK." you hissed, when your shin pulsed with pain. You quickly grabbed the pot with stew to get it off the fire, forgetting it would be hot as well. You hissed in pain and let id drop on your marble floor which was now covered in burned kimchi and some other things. "Fuck, fuck, fuckity, fucking shit." You cursed as you tried to navigate to the sink to ease off the burn with some cold water. The cold water did help and you sighed with relief only to later follow it with a sigh of resignation. You had to clean up this mess. It was when your phone barked — a new message. You checked it.

From Unknown number: Are you trying to burn down the whole building?

You furrowed your brows confused, wondering if it was one of those jokes or spam messages you heard about.

To Unknown number: Who’s this?

From Unknown number: Guess.

You huffed in disbelief.

To Unknown number: Ok, enjoy being blocked.

From Unknown number: Wait!

From Unknown number: It’s Jinyoung.

To Unknown number: How did you get my number? Never mind I’m blocking you I’m too busy to deal with you.

With that you put the phone back in your pocket and began cleaning up. You finished in no time now tired out by scrubbing. You sat on the floor and took out your phone to check it out. From Unknown number: Don’t block me what if you need my help one day.

To Unknown number: With what exactly?

From Unknown number: What if you get stuck in your bathroom and need someone to let you out?

You rolled your eyes and saved his contact

To Devil: There is at least 7 billion more people I’d rather ask to help me

From Devil: Ok then what if I get stuck in the bathroom and need your help.

To Devil: I’d leave you there

From Devil: Heartless

To Devil: Better tell me how did you get my phone number

From Devil: You gave it to me when you scanned my kakao code

You were bewildered, was that his plan from the very beginning or were you just paranoid? You were either prejudiced or he was in fact the devil with angel's face.

To Devil: Did you lie about not remembering your account number?

From Devil: Maybe

You couldn’t believe it, the audacity, the smugness. You could feel irritation building inside you but you decide to let it go when your stomach rumbled at you aggressively. After eating you took shower, read a few chapters of The Vegetarian and fell asleep.

Next week passed quickly but in the feeling of anticipation as you were supposed to meet the rest of the cast as well as the scriptwriter and director at the meeting on Friday. You kept calling your manager throughout the week trying to find out who could they be, but he didn’t know anything or didn’t want to tell you. And so you spent the week on training, running, reading and occasionally calling Mark to express your impatience and excitement. You didn’t meet your irritating neighbor even once this week — something you counted as blessing or perhaps a sign that the universe finally turned your karma around. It was finally Friday and you were already sitting in the meeting room waiting for everyone to come in. You smiled at the young man sitting next to you, he was really cute and had this mole under his right eye it added to his charm. He was about to introduce himself, when someone came through the door and greeted everyone cheerfully. You couldn’t believe it. You were cursed, actually cursed.

"YOU?!" was all that left your mouth upon seeing him entering the room.

[toria-writes]

Spare Me

Summary: You convince Dean and Sam to stop at a bowling alley.

Pairing: Dean Winchester/Reader (platonic), Sam Winchester/Reader (friends)

Warnings: Mention of family's death

Word Count: 1,677 Words

A/N: This is my very first written and published fic. Hope you enjoy it as much as I do! Feedback is always appreciated!

    “Bowling!” You squealed, as the Impala drove by a neon lit sign on the side of the road. “Can we stop? Please, please, please, please?” you begged the two Winchester brothers in the front seat. 

    Dean and Sam looked at each other, unsure.

    “Oh, come on guys! What else better do we have to do right now?” you pleaded.

    “Get drunk?” replied Dean, chuckling.

    “Perfect!” you exclaimed.”Bowling alleys usually have bars and serve greasy food!” you argued. “Please, can we play a couple of games? If you’re both having a miserable time, we can leave, I promise.”

    The brothers looked at each other again with uncertainty and had one of their silent exchanges back and forth, as you stared them both down, with your best puppy dog eyes. Dean huffed, and said, “Fine. A couple of games, some drinks and food, then we’re heading back to the motel room.”

    You squealed with delight, “Thank you boys, you won’t regret it!” 

    Dean swung Baby around and pulled into the lot of the bowling alley. As the three of you were getting out you rifled through your duffle bag, as the boys waited for you. “Aha! Here they are!” You said as you turned around triumphantly, getting out of the car. In your hands were a pair of bowling shoes, white and light blue metallic in color, with some signs of wear.

    “Do you always carry those around with you?” Sam asked incredulously. 

    “Yeah, why?” You asked

    “No reason,” Sam chuckled.

    “You’re lucky I don’t have my bowling ball with me too,” you chuckled, as Sam gave you a quizzical look. You bounded towards the entrance, excited to experience the sights and sounds of a bowling alley again, after a few year’s absence. The sound of the balls rolling down the shiny alleys, the pins crashing, the sound of the ball return machines. It was a place you felt at home. Your family and you used to go bowling weekly, but that was before a skinwalker, disguised as your new family dog, attacked your parents and sister, eating their hearts. You were next, barely holding it off with a silver plated cake server, but then the Winchesters burst through your front door, guns blazing and took out the skinwalker, with their silver bullets.  You left with them that day,after they eliminated the rest of the pack, and haven’t looked back since. You quickly learned about all things that go bump in the night and decided you were going to become a hunter to help other people from feeling the pain and loss you carried with you everyday. That was the reason your bowling shoes were always with you, they reminded you of happier times with your family. You found you had a natural talent for the hunter’s life, and the boys were glad to have you on their team. 

    You approached the front desk and a young twenty-something woman greeted you. “How can I help you?” she asked, batting her eyelashes at Sam and Dean.

    “Can we have a lane for three, please, and shoes for two, I have my own,” you said, holding up your pair. 

    “Sure,” she replied. “What sizes?” she asked as she looked at the boys.

    “Uh, 11, replied Dean. 

     “12,” replied Sam.

    The girl turned around to grab the two pairs in the correct size and stared into Sam’s eyes as she placed them on the counter in front of them. “Hmm, big feet,” she said, raising her eyebrows as she said it, with a smirk. Sam stared back at her and said with a wink, “That’s not all.”

    You saw the girl’s breath hitch as she spluttered out, “Uh, um, lane four.” Her cheeks and ears tinged bright pink. 

    “We will need a menu too, please,” you asked the poor flustered girl. She handed you one, while in a daze, never once taking her eyes off Sam. “Thanks,” you replied.

“N-no problem,” she stammered as you all turned to walk toward your lane. 

    As you got out of earshot of the front counter, you turned to the younger Winchester. “Sam!! That poor girl,” you admonished. “She almost passed out!” 

    “Sorry, (Y/N), it’s been awhile,” Sam said sheepishly while rubbing his hand on the back of his neck.

    “Well, Sam, strike while the iron is hot! You better go back and at least get that girl’s number, It’s bad manners to leave her hanging like that!”

    “Uh, yeah, I’ll, uh, meet you guys at the lane,” Sam said, as he jogged back towards the desk.

    “It’s the least you could do, after ruining her panties,” you muttered under your breath. Dean burst out laughing to your right. You blushed and said, “Didn’t think you heard that.”

    “Oh, I heard you alright, Sweetheart,” Dean said, still chuckling.

    You both found your lane and sat down to put on your bowling shoes. You and Dean were picking your bowling balls from the racks as Sam bounced back over to the two of you. 

    “She gets off at ten,” Sam announced proudly. 

    “Way to go, Casanova!” Dean guffawed as slapped Sam on the back.

    You were putting your names into the computer to keep your scores, as the waitress came over to take your order. Without looking up you said, “Two pitchers of beer and 2 large pizzas, one meat lovers and one veggie, please?” 

    “Sure, coming right up,” she said as she spun on her heel to go put your order in. 

    When you turned around Sam and Dean were staring at you. “Whaat?” you asked. “It’s classic bowling alley food, and I want you both to get the full experience. The meat lovers is for Dean and the veggie is for Sam, obviously.” You heard Dean chuckle to your right. “And, I’ll eat either one,” you stated matter of factly. “So,” you said turning around. “I’ll go first, then Dean and then…”

    “Sammy?! Really, (Y/N)??” Sam asked, giving you his best bitch face, while reading the screen overhead. You started to giggle as Dean burst out laughing. Both of you knowing he preferred to be called “Sam”.

    Just then the waitress returned with your 2 pitchers of beer and 3 glasses. “Here you go, let me know if you need anything else,” she said, placing them on your table. You poured the three drinks for you all, and took a big gulp of yours. Dean doing the same.

    “Now that’s what I'm talking about!” he said.    “Let’s bowl!” You got up, grabbed your ball and took a deep breath. You approached the foul line and as soon as the ball left your hand, you knew. CRASH!! A perfect strike! You turned to look at the boys grinning, only to find them both mid-sip with their mouths hanging open, staring at you.

    “What?” you asked. “I was in a weekly league for 13 years!”  you said, smiling. 

    “You never cease to amaze me, Sweetheart!” said Dean as he got up to take his turn. Luckily, he didn’t see your face turn bright red as you blushed furiously at his compliment.

“Um, t-thanks,” you stuttered out as you caught Sam’s eye, and he gave you a knowing look.  

    For the next couple of hours you and the boys had fun bowling, drinking beer, and eating pizza. It was a perfect day and you made sure to take many pictures with your phone. Including one of you drinking straight from the pitcher, as the boys laughed, cheering you on. You even got one of the bowlers on the next lane to take a few group photos of you three. 

“Let’s just stop for a moment, and really enjoy this day for what it is,” you said, to the boys, as they looked at you quizzically. “A day where we just get to enjoy living, without the weight of saving the world on our shoulders,” you said with a whimsical smile.

“Hells yeah!” Exclaimed Dean. “I’ll drink to that!” He raised his glass and you and Sam did the same, clinking them together and all taking the last sips of your beers. 

“We should definitely do this more often (Y/N),” said Sam.   

“Yeah, it seems a great place for you to pick up girls Sam,” you said teasingly, smirking.

“Speaking of which, it’s almost ten now,” Sam said, checking the time and walking away from the two of you. “I’ll meet you back at the motel later tonight...or tomorrow!” he said, laughing as you both watched him walk away, shaking your heads. 

“So, what now Winchester?” you asked Dean. Your (e/c) eyes meeting his green ones. 

“Well, I could think of a few things to pass the time,” he said suggestively, wiggling his eyebrows.

“You wish, Winchester,” you scoffed, trailing your finger down his muscular chest. “Seems Sammy is the only one getting lucky tonight,” you said in a breathy voice. He quickly hid the disappointment on his face. You definitely had strong feelings for Dean, with his charming good looks, big caring heart and his fierce loyalty, but you did not want to ruin the perfect set up the three of you had. You refused to be another notch on his bedpost, just to ruin your little “family” you had made for yourself.”How about a beer and snack run, then a movie night back at the motel?” you suggested, trying hard to keep your breathing even.

Dean’s face lit up. “That sounds perfect Sweetheart! Who says Sammy is the only lucky one tonight?” he said with a wink.

“I’ve got the perfect movie in mind, too,” you said with a smile. “Kingpin,” you said proudly.

He looked at you and smiled, “Any movie with Bill Murray in it, is a win in my book!” As you walked out he put his arm around your shoulder and said, “My girl sure knows how to pick ’em!” 

    You walked out of the bowling alley with a grin on your face, seriously debating if you made the correct decision to remain platonic friends.

[longitud-de-onda]

hello! could you do headcanons for javi and reader where they were fake dating (maybe being undercover or something idk it's up to you!) turned real dating 😊

so first of all, @themandjalorian is already writing a fic very much like this, its very good and you should totally check it out here 

i wrote out a bit of an undercover thing then i wasn’t feeling it, and i remembered the only fanfic i wrote in high school, which was this adorable fake dating thing i never published and it was based on some prompt about a character having been telling their grandparents about this s/o and them actually just being the neighbor, but then the grandparents come visit and want to meet the s/o so i’m going with something similar to that since it was kind of cute. idk how pleased I am with the final product... but it’s cute. 

You had gotten so fed up with your parents asking you if you were dating anyone during your weekly phone calls that one day you burst and said it

“Okay! I’m dating someone! Is that what you wanted to hear? His name’s… Javier”

They were thrilled for you. Their calls started ending with “how’s it going with Javier” and they expected a little tidbit every time. About Javier. Your neighbor with whom you had only shared about 10 words with.

You had a crush on him, admittedly. It was easy to fall for that charming smile you saw strutting around the embassy. And yeah, you lived in the same building, and both worked at the embassy (in very different departments) but that didn’t mean you had a chance to talk with him.

The real danger of describing the fantasy of your relationship with Javier was that as your parents began to believe it, so did you. You saw him in the hallways and your brain was flooded with thoughts of your fantastical relationship.

But you never managed to work up the guts to even say hello to him.

That is, until your parents give you a call saying they’re coming down for two weeks to visit and they want to meet Javier, how about taking the two of you out to dinner the first night? 

And you agree before realizing how bad of an idea it is.

In your panic you go running to Javier’s door because he has to agree or you’re going to have an awkward conversation with your parents.

You practically bang down his door and when he opens it, standing there, one arm on the door, hip popped out, you freeze, speechless.

“What can I do for you?”

“Um…” 

It takes a very long pause for you to squeak out, “I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend.”

He laughs. “Did Steve put you up to this?”

You flush. This was awful. He was laughing in your face.

“No, I—this was stupid I’m sorry. I should have known. You don’t know me at all, and— you know what? Can we just forget this ever happened?”

But when he sees you retreating, looking completely shot down, he feels a little pang of guilt.

“Wait! ...You were being serious? Do you want to come in? Have a drink?”

Your heart soars. He just invited you into his apartment? Of course you say yes.

The story spills out over a glass of whiskey. When you get to the end, carefully replacing the part where you chose his name because of your massive crush with some half-assed lie about how you had seen him in the hallway the day you started the lie and he was the first face that crossed your mind, Javier sits for a good two minutes, the silence almost killing you. 

“Sounds like fun. I’ll do it. ”

Which is not the response you were expecting but you’re grateful and jumping right into giving him all the background information on your pretend relationship and your parents and Javier is just sitting back, smiling and taking it all in.

After an hour you’re both on your second glasses of whiskey and feeling a bit like you had known each other for more than the short time you had actually spoken.

You go home, smiling to yourself, because if you were being perfectly honest the whole thing felt a bit like a date and you had fallen for him a bit more.

You are fucked.

The day your parents arrive comes way too quickly and before you know it you’re sitting at a fancy restaurant, Javier at your side, and he’s lying his ass off about how you two met and you’re utterly confused as to where this Javier came from.

Where was the Javier who slept with another woman every night? The Javier who drank whiskey alone on a work night? The Javier who knew every prostitute in town? The Javier who any parent would hate to have their daughter date? 

This was an entirely different man, one who was inventing a relationship you could only dream of being part of.

The little moments when he touches your arm and smiles so reassuringly, they feel so real.

You thought this would be a good idea and now your stomach is churning at the elaborate lie you’ve woven for your parents, and the one you’ve woven for yourself.

Javi wasn’t in love with you. He hardly even knew you. And he definitely didn’t mean a single word he was saying nor action he was doing.

And it was so much worse as the week went on. 

Your parents asked why you weren’t living together, which was embarrassing enough a question on its own, but only made worse by Javier’s immediate reaction of disgust before covering it up with a cough and an excuse about wanting to take it slow. 

And one night Javier had warned you he had to leave a dinner at your apartment early, and the way he shuffled a bit and didn’t explain why was enough of a clue that he had an informant to meet. 

It was so much worse when he kissed you before leaving. On the lips. Long and much more intimate than you were expecting.

You realize halfway through your parents visit that your feelings had somehow escalated as you got to know Javier more.

You no longer had a little crush on the man. 

You had fallen in love because you had fallen for a lie.

At that point things begin to change. Your gazes become a little bit more real, and your touches linger a little bit longer. 

The day arrives that your parents are leaving and Javier joins you in driving them to the airport. 

His hand is around your waist as you wave the two goodbye. As they disappear into the crowds of the international departures, you don’t know when to let go.

Javi is the first to drop his hand. And the ghost of his touch burns on your side a bit more than it should.

The drive home is silent. It’s not until you get back to the apartment building that you say something.

“What was in it for you?”

He’s silent and you realize how rude that sounds.

“I’m sorry, I just meant—Thank you. Javier. You saved my ass.”

He gets out of the car and you follow him up the stairs. He turns to enter his apartment and you continue on, but he calls your name.

“I did it because it was nice to pretend things were normal for a bit. Working for the DEA, we don’t get nice things like that.”

And as much as it hurts to know it wasn’t about you at all, it hurts more that Javier feels that way. You had learnt enough about him and his work in the past weeks that you know how much of a commitment it is. You just didn’t know how much it took away from someone’s life.

The real pain comes that night when you hear the loud sounds of Javier fucking someone. The ones everyone in the damn complex are familiar with. The ones that feel like a bucket of ice water was dumped on your head, reminding you how not Javier’s you are.

It’s not until work the next week when Javier walks by your desk and catches sight of how dejected you look. It’s not unlike his own appearance, if you were being perfectly honest.

That night you get a knock on the door. You open to Javier who’s got a six-pack of beer.

“I don’t know why you look like you’ve been trampled over but I haven’t had the greatest week ever and honestly you’re the only person I’ve enjoyed spending time with in the past two months so I thought we could maybe cheer each other up?”

You’re so surprised that you step aside, forgetting momentarily that he’s the reason you look like crap.

Three hours later you’ve moved onto some strong liquors, and are tumbling over one another, laughing and telling stories and talking like you’ve known each other for years. 

And suddenly his lips are on yours and you’re kissing back.

You don’t remember much the next morning, but Javi and you are both naked in your bed. It’s not too much of a jump to the conclusion that you slept with each other.

He’s already awake, and you begin the process of kicking him out of bed. And out of your apartment.

“I’m sorry, Javi,” you say, pushing him out of the door. You didn’t want to become another number in his long line of women. But somehow last night didn’t feel like he was just using you.

“Wait. Tell me you didn’t want that?”

“What?”

“Am I reading into things wrong? Or is there something here?”

The change in tone gives you pause. Enough to seriously question everything you thought about Javier.

“...did you want that?” you whisper.

“I think I did—”

“You think?”

“No. I know. I know I did.” He’s staring at you now.

“So did I.” You take a step forward, pressing your lips gently against his.

[joeyarnoldvn]

2021, February

Biden Law, Five Years Lockdown Monday the first day of February of 2021. Canada Kidnapping Themselves Tuesday. All About Hive Blog Wednesday. Alex Jones and DR. STEVE PIECZENIK Thursday. Are you ready for Weapons of Mass Distraction Friday. Amazon Spies Saturday.

Instagram Rising

I was banned on Bittrex Sunday the 8th. My Cash App is $joeyarnoldvn Monday. Cronyism Sucks Tuesday. Gold-Backed Crypto Wednesday. Protonmail problem on my 36th birthday Thursday. Just kidding. Brother Joined Hive Friday. Shoveling Snow Saturday.

Ice Killed Texans

Happy Valentines Day Sunday the 14th. President's Day. Party at Five Monday. Texas Freezing Tuesday. Vietnamese pho dinner was yummy. Travel Post Banned For Not Being a Travel Post Wednesday. Photoshop Funny Thursday. We Need County Coin Friday. Why is Sweden banning masks Saturday.

Can't Disrupt Commerce lol

Strung up pea strings. The Healthy American Sunday the 21st. Pho dinner. Musical chairs. Weekly Oatmeal Show - Episode 001 Monday. Gina Carona Interview with Ben Shapiro Tuesday. Digging up potatoes. Bible study revived. Being Dead Due To Birth Wednesday. Captain Biden Flying Around Zapping Brown Kids Thursday. My-Body-My-Choice No-Mask Sign Friday. Cleaned Out a Chicken House Saturday. DEADLY-ALLERGIC to YOUR-OWN-BODY Sunday.

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Oatmeal Monthly - 2021-02 - February of 2021 Published in February of 2021

I enjoyed watching season 1 of Tell Me Your Secrets

By Oatmeal Joey Arnold

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Biden Law, Five Years Lockdown Plan

2021-02-01 - Monday

Hello Pocahontas

Americans to be placed under Extreme Lockdown House-Arrest for at least 12 months, that is the plan. You will be stuck in your house like they did in China. You will starve to death and die. The plan is to begin this before 2022, as in as soon as possible. Your loved ones will die from Covid Vaccines which is already murdering hundreds to thousands of people. This is a hole straight down to the pits of Hell.

Canada Kidnapping Themselves

2021-02-02 - Tuesday

Biden, Harris, Napoleon Dynamite Voting Meme

When Canadians return to their home country, Canada, they're federally kidnapped, imprisoned in Covid Concentration Camps for many days, and then charged at least $2,000. Wow. Justin is so liberal. Let's all move to the Land of the Moose. 2 masks at least says CDC. Go to their website and read the article.

Try To Withdraw Money

If you try to take your money out of your bank, they'll flag you, stick the IRS up your butt. Just try it, I dare you. When you try to withdraw cash, watch what happens, and don't get me started with if you ask for gold when you try to cash out. Paper money was supposed to be an "I-Owe-You" check which is supposed to be exchangeable for actual gold, a place-holder.

All About Hive Blog

2021-02-03 - Wednesday

Picture of Joey Arnold

Hive is like Facebook except it pays you to post. Did you know Covid is also called SARS-COV-2? Wait a minute, whatever happened to SARS-COV-1? Did we have a pandemic for the first one? How are we already in the second one? Was I sleeping while the first one was going around? How many years ago was the first one? Is China stealing oil from Texas? Why was Joe Biden refused a Pentagon security clearance? There has been documented cases where people were missing over 90% of their brain tissue but where still able to function like a normal person. One person to even had just a thin layer around the inside of the skull. Literally an empty head and yet could still function as a human. They are destroying the second amendment right now. You have no idea.

Alex Jones and DR. STEVE PIECZENIK

2021-02-04 - Thursday

Trump Terminator

Big interview between Alex Jones and DR. STEVE PIECZENIK today, 2nd hour of the show. The dollar could lose over 20% of its value under Lord Biden before 2022 and much more the following 12 months. It is likely the dollar will die sooner or later meaning you must convert your dollars into something else while you still can. This is financial advice. You have been warned. Your money is on fire but not in a good way. You're leaking value each day. You might as well give me your money as you're losing your money each second. You're wasting your money as you let inflation destroy the value of fiat. Was the Burma Election stolen like it was in America? If you think Biden won, then you do NOT know who won in Burma. I don't care what military is doing. Who won the election in Burma? I'm asking who got the most real votes excluding the fake votes. I want to know who really won. Please let the REAL WINNER be the leader of what you call Myanmar. Whoever actually won should be allowed to run that country, period. Military should help whoever got the most legal votes in that nation. Period. I don't know who won. I am just saying let the real winner have the power, good or bad.

Fall or Rise of Empires

This is what Mike Adams said today. He said something bad could happen over night, that is to the extent the dollar crashes, they'll try to blame the crazy Redditters, the conservatives, for destroying the money, they'll come up with crazy excuses, conspiracy theories, and then say how they saved us by giving us Biden Coins or whatever they want to call it. They are trying to have one centralized global digital currency, no cash, no decentralized cryptocurrencies. So, I agree this could happen at any time, especially if three or more stimulus checks come out in 2021, as they spend more and more money, as people demand silver, gold, etc. The centralized banking system could fall in the next few years or sooner. As that happens, either the good guys or the crazy globalists and baby eaters can take over as that happens. So, in other words, we are in a major transition in global history similar to the rise or fall of other great empires like that of Rome, Babylon, Persia, England, China, etc. But I can't say if we are in the middle of the fall or the rise of an evil authoritarian regime.

Are you ready for Weapons of Mass Distraction?

2021-02-05 - Friday

Alex Jones

Happy birthday brother. Are you ready for Weapons of Mass Distraction? In order to buy guns in 2021 in America, you either have to right now or potentially soon will have to pay too many taxes, additional taxes, including gun related taxes, and pass a test which includes questions relating to if you want to own a gun. If you answer you want a gun, you fail the test because only crazy bad guys want guns. If you want a gun, pass a test. The only way to pass the test is to answer you do not want a gun. Once you answer you do not want a gun, then the genie in the bottle comes out and says in the voice of Robin Williams in Disney's cartoon movie, Aladdin, "As you wish." There were at least two 2020 USA General Election court cases which heard evidence meaning the other dozen or more cases were unconstitutionally dismissed by compromised judges. There is one case in Arizona which is leading towards potential ballot auditing. There may be other legal cases pending in other states in the United States of America. New court cases may rise. Others are ongoing. Some may be, if they haven't yet, potentially, refiled or retried. In some cases, you can do that. It's not double-jeopardy in some cases. It depends but you can sometimes do this depending on the details. A federal case for example could be then tried on the state level. That is not double jeopardy. You can pressure your local counties to call for ballot audits today. Join the revolution.

Nullifying Federal Executive Orders

North Dakota is planning to nullify (on a state level) unconstitutional federal executive orders. If you're not living in this state, you should either go there or encourage your state to call up North Dakota. Hello Texas, Idaho, Wyoming, Arizona, etc. In the world of rock paper scissor, you can see state and federal power. However, never underestimate the power of the county sheriff which trumps over them. You should make friends with your local sheriffs and talk to them about the rule of law regarding what you have to do in your county, legally speaking. Don't go against the sheriffs. Find out what they expect from you as a citizen of the county you're living in.

Amazon Spies

2021-02-06 - Saturday

Trump

Amazon vans have cameras actively spying on people, as in anybody and everybody as they drive around delivering packages, not just their customers but also neighbors and everyone else as well. They collect the data in order to develop a China Social Credit Score Database. Even if you're not on Facebook, they'll still have your data. If you do something that our overlords deem not right, your social credit score begins to go down and down. A lower Social Credit Score means you will not be able to buy and sell, travel, have food, have protection, have safety, have a job, have schooling, have a house, have children, have parents, have organs, have water, have power, have Internet, have apps, have trash, have doctors, have hospitals, have health care. When you call 911 and say somebody cut off your arm and you are bleeding to death, the operator will answer the phone and say, "Sorry, your social credit score is too low, please raise it to an acceptable level and try your call again. Have a good day. Good bye."

I was banned on Bittrex

2021-02-07 - Sunday

I was banned on Bittrex

Banks and big tech companies are making special cities all around the world. Covid to End on the 31st of March of 2025 according to WorldBank.org.

My Cash App is $joeyarnoldvn

2021-02-08 - Monday

Facebook Restricted

My Cash App is $joeyarnoldvn and what is yours? Let's have a party before the dollar dies. Let's come up with backup plans and come together in local communities while we still can. Now is the time.

Cronyism Sucks

2021-02-09 - Tuesday

Cronyism Sucks

George Washington did NOT say, "My fellow Americans, read my lips, I hereby grant you some rights which we can then take away if there is a pandemic or if you feel a little unsafe regarding your neighbor's cannons." You can either help your state leave the United States of Satan or you can leave that state. A woman in Vancouver, Washington went to a hospital. Nurses and doctors tried to stick a needle in her arm against her wishes. She said no. The hospital called the police who came and kidnapped her for not breaking the law. No crime. The hospital and the police committed crime against her. And believe all women. And what if I told you she was black and black lives matter. And police are bad. The police might as well sell her to sex trafficking. Don't we want to defund the police? And I am Pro-Choice too. My Body My Choice. And none of your business. Thousands of people go to Oakes Farms Market in Florida daily without masks in 2020 and many of them go there seven days a week because it's the new Disneyland, the happiest place on earth, even some of their staff are 80 years old or older and yet are not getting sick. But if you do want to wear a mask, have at it. Hundreds of new customers come in each day from out of state, some come as far as like New York. You can tell they're new because when they enter the store, their jaws drop like as if they're cartoon characters.

Cash App

My Cash App is $joeyarnoldvn and what is yours? Let's have a party before the dollar dies. Let's come up with backup plans and come together in local communities while we still can. Now is the time. I will invest in a gold-backed cryptocurrency, as much as I can. Is there such a thing yet? Sign up to be a First Responder today, just call, not toll-free, at 1-800-Get-A-Gun-Duh. Don't kill your chickens, wait until they die of old age, say a little prayer to remember the wonderful life Chicken Little had and then get out your knife and prepare for a feast in honor of the life of the little guy. Study shows over 80% of Covid-19 Patients have vitamin D deficiency. Nurses stick stuff inside babies causing hearts to stop. After that, they try their best to restart the infant's hearts. Too many do die. It is covered up. You don't hear about it. Most viruses die in the air within seconds. Over 85 percent of child trafficking related things seem to be happening on Facebook Messenger.

Gold-Backed Crypto

2021-02-10 - Wednesday

Find me on Instagram at Joeyarnoldvn

Gold and silver are accepted as legal currencies in Utah, Oregon, Colorado, Oklahoma, and Missouri. Before 2030, globalists will most likely murder over 6 billion people. The good news is, number one, we can try to stop some of that, and, number two, regardless, you don't have to be one of them, you don't have to die, there may be only a billion people left on our planet soon. Come join me and survive this coming Holocaust. The greatest Holocaust ever. Save as many people as you can. But at the same time, you don't have to die. Get out of the big cities. Find a farm while you still can. You are running out of time. Find a community of like-minded people and get a room, I mean a community, a neighborhood, a state where you can find like-minded people. Do it while you still can.

Genocide Coming

Because there may be over 7 billion people who support the globalist agenda, they will end up dying most likely in the next few years. You must be prepared for this probability or worst case scenario. Every day you're still not dead yet is precious. You get what you promote. Justice is coming. There are consequences and rewards for the actions we take in life. Will you buy smart underwear which will be connected to the NSA? How do we detox from the lead which is in the soil? I have a friend named Tim Osman. Please don't Google his name. You can make money posting to blockchain social networks, I can help you sign up for free, no credit cards, no money required. I post on these websites and I make money. I did not put any money into them. You can take the money out. You can wire the money to crypto exchanges, banks, wallets.

Protonmail Banned Me on my 36th birthday.

2021-02-11 - Thursday

Protonmail Banned Me on my 36th birthday.

Protonmail Banned Me on my 36th birthday. Step one, find out how many people died annually for the last ten years in your country. Step two, please post those statistics for each individual year including 2020 in your report. We will copy and paste what you find everywhere. Thank you very much. Leftists say you have to say chest, can't say your baby is sucking on your breasts. You have to say human milk. You cannot say it is the milk of the mother. Oh My God. Russia killed the ALL-MIGHTY DOLLAR! I hate you RUSSIA! Are you happy America is becoming Venezuela in the next few years or much sooner because you do nothing, isn't that really cool that you're helping this republic and the world crumble? Are you excited as millions of people die? Do you wake up each morning happy that you don't care about this? Covid Vaccine has over 5 different viruses which it programs and mass produces in your cells to eat up your body from the inside-out, to attack the proteins, to kill your babies, to give you HIV, to kill your immune system and cause you to die from the common cold within months to the extend you're lacking enough essential vitamins.

Regarding Gold-Backed Cryptocurrencies

But the idea of a gold-backed cryptocurrency could at least in theory become a 2-in-1 deal where it might be backed by gold and yet as a fail-safe if all else goes wrong, if governments and others come in to confiscate the gold, you would still have something like Bitcoin or whatever type of cryptocurrency it may be. I see that as a potential two in one deal. Of course the risks, liability, privacy risks of having governments seek to imprison people for having gold which might be connected to a cryptocurrency, I understand that might be too big of a risk in some situations, it may be harder to be anonymous if police were to spot you holding some gold. Finding ways to stay as anonymous online in the mist of tyranny is a worthy cause and that is why I value the 4th amendment of the U.S. constitution. Cartoons and other children shows are actively singing songs and otherwise encouraging toddlers to wear masks, to not shake hands, hug, or get close to other people; to simply not be humans at all, this will scar these kids for the rest of their lives, deep intellectual abuse.

Brother Joined Hive

2021-02-12 - Friday

My brother joined Hive - When I Was Young, Busted Knees, No Helmets, No Limits

Mother cries as insulin for his son who could die without it costs more than $500 even as it only costs pennies to make. Biden did this. Watch the video of this mother in her car video. Listen to her passion as she speaks truth. They say even after everyone on the planet is vaccinated, we still must have lockdown globally, even in ten years from now. Are you happy for living on Planet Wall-E as Fat People stuck in The Matrix? Over ten million starved to death in 2020 thanks to people staying at home and being safe. We kept ourselves so safe, we ended up dying because we had no food. We are so scared, we make the problem worse. The odds of coming up with the exact numbers of the 2020 U.S. General Elections, Mathematician Expert Edward Solomon says there aren't enough stars in the known universe to have it come up by chance apart from electronic manipulation, statistically, it's astronomical, he went on to say there aren't even enough atoms in the universe. Biden won exactly the same percentage points across multiple precincts at designated times a day just long enough to put him in the lead. One example in Fulton County, Georgia on starting at 12:54 AM on Wednesday, the 4th of November of 2020, the percentage was set 5.5555%, and every 30 minutes to an hour plus a few times on Thursday, that is eleven separate times, each time it was exactly 5.555% percent, and that is humanly impossible to replicate by hand without the help of voting software.

Elmo Vaccine

Elmo got the vaccine and people on Sesame Street are locked in their homes like as if they were living in China. Children are being brainwashed. This is worse than sexual abuse. Green means you can travel. Different colors means different things under the Chinese Credit Score which is going to Europe, Australia, Canada, and is also slowly getting into America. If the centralized powers don't like you or your friends, then you can't work, school, travel, buy, sell, have your kids, have Internet, have a phone plan, health care, police care, fire care, water, sewer, garbage, food, etc. There is an alleged James Clapper interrogation audio tape which I'm listening to right now.

Shoveling Snow

2021-02-13 - Saturday

Michelle Obama, "Joe Biden, get your hands off my dick."

Before getting the Covid Vaccine, read the ingredients, the insert. And tell yourself, oh, I am putting this thing in my body, that is awesome. And oh, I am putting this other thing in my body. It is not a vaccine. Ignorance is Bliss. It's cool when you don't know you don't know something. It's cool when millions of people are likely to die or very close to it in 2021 because of Covid Vaccines.

Money is Dying

Cannot wait for the dollar to die. A study found that over 80% of those who got Covid were vitamin-D deficient. And the Flu magically disappeared during the winter. If you're going off the CDC website, you should make a list of the exact numbers.

Happy Valentines Day

2021-02-14 - Sunday

Joe Biden in like 2003

Happy Valentines Day. America has been dead for 209 years. They try to kill people via nano bots which goes into the body to cause flu like symptoms. That is fused with 5G, geoengineering, chemicals, waves, a variety of things working together. You must actively try ten times harder to counter as much of it all as you can, your ignorance is bliss, your children will suffer to the extent you try not to counter things you are yet to know. I repeat, things you are yet to know. Apple cider vinegar, 2 tablespoons a day but broken up gradually throughout the day, can help you. Encouraging healthy pH blood level balance minimizes cancer, detoxifies the liver, dissolves viruses, and helps the heart. The brain-gut connection. Is it true the last U.S. President to take the oath for the united states for America was back in around 1812? Has America been dead for over two centuries now? Did you know there is a star inside our earth? Biden is telling Americans to wear masks until 2022.

Reducing Zombism

Candida is a type of fungus which helps decompose dead bodies but the problem comes when the people are still alive while Candida is excessively growing and eating up your body even before you are actually dead. Therefore, you want to look at fasting, at starving those little guys at least once every ten years if not as often as you can to minimize how much of them you have inside of your biology. Borax detoxes fluoride from the brain. Inside your body are the bad guys, the fungi, which wants your body to die, and the good guys, which are the bacteria which wants your body to live, that is the civil war within your chemical makeup. The pineal gland in our brain is a spiritual window into the Supernatural Internet which transcends space and time, it truly is the third eye, but fluoride blocks it. Does the earth have two moons?

Party at Five

2021-02-15 - Monday

Star Wars Luke Kenobi Father Vader Anakin Floor is Lava Game Sucks He Was And Died Hahaha Meme

Party at Five. RINOs are Republican In Name Only and PINOs are Patriots In Name Only. Thousands of refugees are being allowed into California and Texas from Mexico but without being tested for Covid, no masks, no safety. But if you want to go anywhere or do anything, you have to get tested. When immigrants come in, as they do right now, they are NOT being tested for anything really, they can pass on diseases to you and you are not allowed to do anything period.

Texas Freezing

2021-02-16 - Tuesday

Girl from Firefly show

A 28 YEAR OLD WISCONSIN MOM DIES DAYS AFTER SECOND PFIZER SHOT. Why are kids sneaking out of the White House? Is Tom Cruise part of an off-planet corporation called Umbrella? You can find really old videos on the Internet of really tall people, some of them may be 14 feet tall or taller as you can see people and horses almost reach the height of this man's knees. Did you really think those videos were fake? Many times you'll find truth hiding in plain sight. Truth is often lying underneath your nose all along. This takes the Mandela Effect to a whole new level. Is the South Pole actually the North Pole? It's below zero degrees in Texas right now, they refusing to turn the power back on as people freeze to death, they're shutting down stores as people starve to death, and they're refusing to plow roads. You can literally watch videos of giant semi-trucks crashing into other trucks, at least three giant trucks, one which was going at least 70 MPH and the others were going pretty fast too, several people died in just that pile up alone.

Who is Oatmeal Joey Arnold?

I am single, 36 years old, I live in Shelton, I am Christian, no kids, I live with my parents, I don't wear a mask ever, I listen to Alex Jones, I love Trump, I am a little bit crazy, I don't work. I don't have a job. I just sit on a computer all day writing on my blog and that is it. Was the inspiration behind the Star Gate movies and shows stolen from the Native American Indians? Weather manipulation meetings at your local town hall in a county or state near you, why are you not there to ask them questions? Things got so bad in India that they created a task force and then ended up banning the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation. That's how EVIL India is. Hey folks, how could India keep out our SAVIORS? We all know Bill Gates is the second coming of Jesus Christ. Kissinger wrote a report back in the 1970s regarding how to control the African population.

Travel Post Banned For Not Being a Travel Post

2021-02-17 - Wednesday

White Culture Dont Have Any Joke Yes We Do

Texas Dark Winter to last for weeks, people are freezing and starving to death, people are so excited as the globalists take over the world, Biden said the Dark Winter was coming, he was right. Be prepared for a new biological weapon, a new Covid disease, coming either this year in 2021 or at least before 2025. It will kill at least 4 billion people. Don't tell me I didn't warn you. I'm on record trying to tell you how bad things are. If you're reading this, you're guilty of not caring. Please, do something. The clock is ticking. Will China be aiming nuclear weapons at 24 targets across the globe, will it be real, will it be staged, will it be an excuse to lockdown the world, what is going to happen? Will it be exactly 24 different places in different countries around this planet? Will this be a good thing or a bad thing? Will the good guys or the bad guys be able to take control of whatever that might happen in February of 2021? Will it be any day now? Will people fall for false flags? Is there anything we can do right now?

Bill Gates Over Biden

Biden won't speak to world leaders. Boris Johnson said Bill Gates is really the head of the G8. This is how globalism works. They're getting the general population used to the world being run by technocracy. In a secret video, Mark Zuckerberg told his Facebook staff he didn't trust the Covid Vaccine. So, why isn't Mark telling his 2 billion users this? Why keep such a thing a secret? In the 1960s, America asked Russia to start a world war against China but Russia declined. That was declassified.

Photoshop Funny

2021-02-18 - Thursday

1776 Put Mask On Americans No Way

Funny story today, somebody used photoshop to try to fool me ahahahahhaaa! Biden is taking over the Texan Power-Grid, red alert, warning warning. We know their plan. We know the patterns. They'll say deadlier strands are out there now. This will likely be by the fall of 2021 if not a lot sooner. The strands will generally be less deadly. But it's extremely coordinated, scripted, they will all try their best to make you gulp down this Kool-Aid of Death. Shifting into Techno-Scientific Dictatorship, they're phasing the general public to accept this shift in world history globally, most people are stuck in a trance and they do NOT even know it. Even if you tell them, they will say to you, "You are crazy." THEY'RE PUTTING CHEMICALS IN THE SKY THAT MAKES THE SNOW GAY. The power grid was an attack on water-power devices, especially in the 1930s. Some people had water-powered devices. They didn't need electricity because they water-powered devices.

Scaring Children to Death

A ten year old was admitted to the hospital because he was losing weight because he was refusing to eat for so long because he was afraid he would get Covid and die. Sergeant Major said they don't call it a Lie-Berry for nothing. Did you know they used to have water-powered mechanical devices? You were not told real history. A lot of stuff covered up. Why not get back to water power? Aren't you even just a little bit curious? People had free electricity thanks to tap water in the early 1900s. So, why would people give that up? What happened? Why trade that in for a monthly electricity bill?

We Need County Coin

2021-02-19 - Friday

Lauren Chen was on Friday Night Tights

Steele mentioned the idea of CountyNet. Also, he mentioned an idea of a CountyCoin which loses value the farther away from the county the coin moves in order to incentivize investing back into the same community as opposed to going excessively and obsessively overseas aggressively, as in too much and too often. I confess I fell for fake news when I thought Babbit died. I was wrong. Steele says Wall Street and others stolen 100 trillion dollars. People in power plants in Texas were ordered to lower down, to power down to zero percent in most cases, the documents are here, you can read the documents, they were ordered to do this on purpose, this is KILLING PEOPLE, and YOU DO NOT CARE. Do you have no friends or family in Texas? 2021-02-14 - Sunday - 08:51 PM EST - The 14th of February of 2021 - DOE Order Number 202-21-1 was issued for Texas (ERCOT), for more info, go to Energy dot gov, their official government website.

Texas Being Murdered

The Department of Energy (DOE) was ordered to turn off the power in Texas which is causing people to die. They're literally murdering people and nobody cares. The evidence is right there, we can all grab and share it. But nobody cares that thousands to millions of Texans are starving and freezing to death. I said, to death. The Department of Energy told Texas they CANNOT produce more energy, that is why people are dying. DOE Order Number 202-21-1 mentions ERCOT (ISO), this document can be read on their official government website, you can go there, you can read it, you can pass it on to your friends, or you can let your friends die in the cold in Texas with no power. Texas electricity bill for your power, just this week now, went from $50 per Megawatt to over $9000 per Megawatt. Breaking News,  Megan Fox is an Anti-Masker which means she is Pro-Vitamin, we are all going to die.

Why is Sweden banning masks?

2021-02-20 - Saturday

Alpha Heater

Why is Sweden banning masks? Many times, they ban people from YouTube but then let other upload the same videos or similar videos and profit from them. The Covid Vaccine is not a remedy but an operating system.

The Healthy American

2021-02-21 - Sunday

We Stole It Fair & Square

Stores are not legally allowed to discriminate or disrupt commerce which comes from even the customers who refuses to wear masks. Stores can say it's private property. However, because the stores are open to the public, thanks to the 4th amendment, thanks to other things as well, prohibiting customers is discrimination among other things as well. The maskless buyer is not trespassing if he or she is not disrupting commerce. Moreover, when you prohibit customers from stores, then you are engaging in the disruption of commerce which may be illegal among other things as well partly because the customers are part of the free market exchange system which we call commerce. Stopping customers means you are disrupting commerce. That is illegal. You should go to jail for disrupting commerce. It may be many different things, not just that. Stores and states must be held accountable for violating laws. Stores are public. They cannot enforce masks. Churches however are legally considered to be private and can enforce masks.

Weekly Oatmeal Show - Episode 001

2021-02-22 - Monday

Coco Cola White Polar Bear Fired For Being Too White

Sound of Freedom is a great movie. The only preparedness that counts is the preparedness that happens when you don't yet need it. One day without notice, you will wake up and you will go to an ATM and it will not work. You will have no food in your house for many weeks to many months or longer. It takes less energy to walk on two legs than it takes to run four legs. The majority of suicides are from white male adults. Second spot is held by black male adults. Why was Bill Gates thrown out of 32 countries? New monthly vaccines for the virus of the month. Are you excited? He said now we have to difficult work of "Untying this knot," that is code for crazy people have to be sent off to re-educational FEMA camps where they will either recant or be murdered.

Gina Carona Interview with Ben Shapiro

2021-02-23 - Tuesday

Gina Carona Interview with Ben Shapiro

Gina interview. Why did NASA stop looking for life on Mars in 1976, why did they transition after that to geology, to looking for rocks? Trump got over 80 million votes while Biden got less than 40 million. Why are so many world leaders saying Covid-19 is permanent? They refuse to test it on animals because it kills animals or worse. No animals were harm in the making of this post. God save the animals. I'm glad we skipped animal-testing.

Being Dead Due To Birth

2021-02-24 - Wednesday

Tell Me Your Secrets

The only time your name is written in all uppercase capital letters is on your tombstone and yet that is how it's formatted on birth certificates, when parents sign it IN CURSIVE LETTERS when you are born, that is necromancy. When they say you can't leave the hospital with your own newborn infant baby without signing it, that is theft or worse. Legally speaking, it is a literal death sentence as you are literally selling away your baby. You need to live in groups of at least ten people. Zombies will be coming from the big cities. Protect your family from the walking dead. Why are so many big people being arrested around the world each day? Why?

Who Controls The Military Right Now?

Was an executive order or other items signed officially in 2019 authorizing a former (allegedly incumbent) U.S. President full control of the military even up to 60 days after an alleged inauguration of a alleged new administration (that is the new but fake President of the possibly defunct United Corporate States of America) which would end in or around, approximately, on the 20th of March of 2021? Please let me know such things were not signed. Please let your friends know nothing at all happened in 2019 at all. I'm only asking. I have no idea what happened.

Captain Biden Flying Around Zapping Brown Kids

2021-02-25 - Thursday

Captain Biden Flying Around Zapping Brown Kids

My gender is oatmeal. That is the kind of sex or gender I am. In India, doctors are saying women who get the Covid Vaccines are showing signs of the beginning stages of sudden breast cancer. Wow. This is amazing. Sign me up. Now we can all be Booby-Free Angelina Jolie. Please stick ten of those things in my arms today. Quick, this cannot come fast enough. Make boobs not great again. Please tell your friends how awesome this is. Learn To Say No Just For One Day Article. Tree Court Article.

Globalist vs Brazil

In Brazil, they're trying to force the government to not only waive all liability for the Covid Vaccines but also to sign over military bases over to them as well, it's insane but crazy things happen daily if only you knew the half of it. Back to American news. The Supreme Court has committed treason against the constitution and the republic of these American states. They've ruled saying whoever cheats the most in an election gets to be the alleged president of this defunct fake corporation which we illegally call in all caps THE UNITED STATES OF [not 'for'] AMERICA. Cheating is not only allowed but now also endorsed by the highest court of the land.

My-Body-My-Choice No-Mask Sign

2021-02-26 - Friday

My-Body-My-Choice No-Mask Sign

Masks Causes Bacteria Pneumonia. My-Body-My-Choice No-Mask Sign. Their goal is to make all humans unable to naturally reproduce by 2030. Why is South Africa cancelling the Covid Vaccine? There is also related news in Brazil, India, etc. See, people are dying from vaccines. They've been spending billions to trillions of dollars covering up vaccine deaths for decades globally. They murder people who expose this or worse in most cases. You have no idea how bad it is. Bill Gates and others are involved in giving vaccines to people around the world. That is why Bill Gates is banned in so many countries. In other news, there may be someday selling cloned synthetic children meat to encourage people to eat. Hell, they may have it ready already. Celebrity meat actually. The only we defeat this invisible enemy is to decide our own destiny. 80% of people who died of Covid in Canada were in nursing homes. 101 Pocketball Journal Scans Uploaded.

Covid Vaccines Are Murdering People

Why are over 75% of U.S. military troops refusing the Covid Vaccine? Because vaccines kill people. But more than that, the Covid Vaccine is not a vaccine. It utilizes mRNA which turns your cells into virus factories. That is what mRNA is. See, the M on mRNA means MESSENGER. This is Basic Biology & Science 101 For Dummies here. The vaccine literally sends messages or mRNA into the cell nucleus to tell it to make specific items. Covid-19 and the alleged vaccines in response to it are both GMO-like chimera monsters. They're a combination of different viruses, different things, I'm talking Frankenstein on a microscopic level. I've been talking about this many times. That is why so many people and so many countries are saying no to the vaccines. And again, the Covid Vaccines are not even vaccines to begin with. I wouldn't even be surprised if nano-tech is involved among other things in regards to these things which are murdering people right now. Sadly, they're blaming the mRNA deaths on Covid. So, they're trying very hard to make you think that you need to take monthly vaccines. And the more people die, the more they'll say, "Hurry up, you need even more vaccines, etc." Remember, they have spent billions to trillions of dollars covering up vaccine deaths. They murdered many people who tried exposing them. Fake news would never tell you all of this because they're fake news.

Cleaned Out a Chicken House

2021-02-27 - Saturday

Alex Jones Predicting Covid-19 Back in 2010

Wear a mask or I'm calling the cops. Alright, call the cops. I'm suing them. In 2020, over 40 million alleged votes for Biden were fake. In 2008, it was reported that HAARP was learning how to steer hurricanes via high-atmosphere heat injection, kind of like guiding a kitten with a string. Watch out for Bioterrorism says Bill Gates. Which reminds me, kind of funny how Texas was suddenly colder than Montana. Wow. Out of nowhere. What happened on this day in 1933? Reich Fire. Hitler. Germany. Klaus Schwab says you will ONLY ONLY ONLY eat bugs and will love it.

What is in the Covid Vaccine?

Some of the ingredients for the mRNA Covid Vaccine includes some of the most commonly consumed things including vinegar, salt, sugar, plus a few very common preservatives found in so many food items. Too many people buy processed foods which includes preservatives in them. So, why are these commonly consumed items in the vaccine? It is there to trigger autoimmune responses in your body's immune system. It may takes years for your body to get there, but slowly over time, your body will begin to develop allergies to salt, sugar, vinegar, etc. These allergies may spiral out of control into even worse problems over time. Now, that is just the tip of the iceberg. But it is a good thing to start with and share with others. Don't believe me. Don't take my word for it. Go get a list of the ingredients to these vaccines and post them here. I will wait for your awesome responses. Thank you so much in advance for responding with the real list of ingredients. Prove me wrong. Easy to do. Just show me the ingredients. Show me these items, like salt, is not in the vaccine.

DEADLY-ALLERGIC to YOUR-OWN-BODY

2021-02-28 - Sunday

Covid Vaccine Ingredients

Your body will become DEADLY-ALLERGIC to YOUR-OWN-BODY. Why is Pfizer giving their customers one thing but their staff a different thing? Pfizer got a new drug out which is going to help people deal with one of the side-effects of their own vaccines. So, they make money trying to fool you into getting one and then even more money when you have to come back to take some of their drugs to deal with the deadly side-effects. Have fun, kids. You WILL swell up like a balloon. I warned you. Why were thousands to millions of 2020 ballots had computer-printed vote marks as opposed hand-written vote marks all for Biden and none for Trump?

Trump 2024 is Retarded

Downvote because Trump won in 2020. See, they can steal it from Trump in 2024 too. We have to call for FORENSIC-STYLE ballot audits in each county each day. Call people. Email people. You can make a difference. Call the military. Call Congress. Call judges. Write letters. Protest in person. Make videos. Write articles. Share things everywhere. Do something. If you are reading this and you are doing nothing, then you deserve Biden and the Chinese takeover of America.

Who is Oatmeal Joey Arnold?

Telling The Truth in a World of Lies

Biden Law, Five Years Lockdown Plan

Canada Kidnapping Themselves

All About Hive Blog

Alex Jones and DR. STEVE PIECZENIK

Are you ready for Weapons of Mass Distraction?

Amazon Spies

I was banned on Bittrex

My Cash App is $joeyarnoldvn

Cronyism Sucks

Gold-Backed Crypto

Protonmail Banned Me on my 36th birthday

Brother Joined Hive

Shoveling Snow

Happy Valentines Day

Party at Five

Texas Freezing

Travel Post Banned For Not Being a Travel Post

Photoshop Funny

We Need County Coin

Why is Sweden banning masks?

The Healthy American

Weekly Oatmeal Show - Episode 001

Gina Carona Interview with Ben Shapiro

Being Dead Due To Birth

Captain Biden Flying Around Zapping Brown Kids

My-Body-My-Choice No-Mask Sign

Cleaned Out a Chicken House

DEADLY-ALLERGIC to YOUR-OWN-BODY

[weeklyhumorist]

Bill Lumbergh Leads a Zoom Meeting

Okay, let’s see here. ‘Join Meeting.’ Yes.

Is…hello? Is everyone on? Peg, how many do we have here, it should be…18 today. I see Samir, there’s Tom. Peter, nice of you to join us.

Okay everyone, this shouldn’t take more than a few minutes or so. I wrote in my email this morning why I have to get going early. Did everyone get it? Stephen has lacrosse in Derryfield and it’s the season opener, yada yada, have to schmooze with the moms, that sort of thing.

Anyway, first I want to point out what an outstanding job some of you are doing when it comes to putting the new watermark on your Google Slides. Dom and I have been working through all the kinks, a little of this, a little of that, and we finally got it where it needs to be so that you can use it. So, if you all could go ahead and, uh, use it, that would be fantastic.

Now, about Slack. It seems there have been some problems lately when it comes to people not responding to messages – how should I say this – quickly. I’ve talked with Bob and Bob about this and we feel like this is a good sign of whether or not someone is a team player. We’re going on month eight of working from home, so by now you should be treating this as if you’re at your desk or otherwise within my line of sight.

If you really are having a browser issue, you can’t go wrong with Internet Explorer. Those other ones are a little too…a little too flashy for my taste. And if it’s an app issue, well, reinstalling it usually helps. Like I’ve always said, your smartphone is only as smart as the person using it. So, if there’s no technical problem – and I won’t single anyone out, Michael – if you could save the Netflix and the Hulu for after hours, that would be fantastic.

Which reminds me, actually: even though we’re not in the office, and that’s really, really too bad, we do still have a dress code. What it comes down to is that we feel it improves employee morale, and therefore company productivity. But I’ve been doing some, you know, thinking, about this, and since these are such stressful times, I’ve decided that from now on, Fridays will be Hawaiian shirt day or t-shirt with animals day. So, if you want to, you may participate accordingly. I think Nina in Accounts may have a few top-of-the-line items for just this occasion!

But on a serious note, we will be doing a bit of – how do you say – restructuring in the coming months. Weeks, actually, if the timeline holds. You see, Payroll informed me that we really needed to clamp down on overtime, and Bob and Bob and I thought, “Hey, why don’t we just cut off a few branches instead of, you know, having to rake up a bunch of leaves every weekend,” so to speak. Yeah.

Oh, I almost forgot: a reminder to fill out the Personnel Contact Form so you can be reached if Slack is down or if there’s…another issue there. All we need is your cell, two personal emails, your Instagram and Twitter handles, your LinkedIn, Facebook and any dating site profiles, your Snapchat and Skype username, your Signal, GroupMe, WeChat and WhatsApp number (if different than your cell), your YouTube channel and your TikTok account. Tumblr is optional.

That about does it, so I’m going to go ahead and let you go now. Stephen’s birthday is on Thursday, and since normally I know you all would sign a big, big card for him, instead I’m going to record his game this afternoon so you all can watch it tomorrow morning before work. Shouldn’t take longer than an hour and a half. I’ll be going live on Periscope at 4, actually, if anyone on the 8 to 4 schedule wants to catch it then. Either way, please use a work device so that I can confirm on Hubstaff that you’ve seen it all the way through. Anyway, that would just be fantastic, I know he’d really, really appreciate it.

Alright, I will see you all soon, hopefully in person. But I do have this…feeling that with our luck this year, and with everything that’s been going on, the office would probably, I don’t know, burn down on our first day back or something. Imagine that, yikes!

Okay, thanks for your input, Initech Initiators. Be well.

‘Leave Meeting.’ Yes.

  Bill Lumbergh Leads a Zoom Meeting was originally published on Weekly Humorist

[nightmaretyrantvantas]

Ok so guys i finally got part of it done(like three or four days later buuuut

I drew two sets of the families for my anxceit au!

Please meet virgil's family the Ravenwoods!

And as curtesy some info about them

Daneil Ravenwood

Hes been raising Virgil and Andy on his own since virge was about 8 and a half and andy was 6 months old

Hes a english and literature professor at the local college(that logan's parents also work at)

Hes in his late 50s early 60s current time( where virgil is 21 and andy is 13)

Hes also a published and well established fiction writer, but he writes under an alias

Hes a super supportive dad and teacher, even if he doesnt understand it he'll 100% support the decisions his kids make (ex: "oh your wiccan now? Cool virgy! Im glad you found a religion that makes you happy, though...can you explain it to me again?" "Oh andy you want to be switched to the art program? No problem! I'll call your counsellors tomorrow ok?" "Oh boyfriend huh? Thats great buddy, when do i get to meet him??")

Hes got a deep hearty laugh that makes you smile

Dad jokes to virgils mortification

Hes a skeptic but loves listening to and talking to virgil about his beliefs

had the philosophy of "the punishment should fit the crime, but you should be allowed to stumble and learn with it" raising the boys and wasnt too strict with them. Also never threatened punishments, only threatened playful embarrassment

The boys got their sass from somewhere, but he does remind them to mind their manners and watch their timing

Gentle giant as he is 6'3

Black hair peppered with grey and white and usually forgets tonshave his stubble

Passionate about his jobs, can get lost in his work

Andy Ravenwood

Virgil's baby brother, and he fucking adores his brother( even sometimes babbles about him to his friends at school and proudly talks about his "youtuber big brother"

This does not stop him from poking fun at virgil of course

Art boi!! Hes the top of his art classes!!

He is the one art kid that always has like three sketchbooks on him at all times

Loves the color purple

Look ok he knows he KNOWS his hair looks like his brothers it wasnt supposed to ok the original plan baCKFIRED AND HE COULDNT TURN BACK

Unlike virgil he doesnt cover his freckles

He has the same color eyes as their dad(grey-blue)

Andy loves animals! Especially raccoons!! Those are his favorite.( he happily took on the responsiblility of taking care of virgils cat when he moved out)

Hes a pretty cheerful kid if hes comfortable around you, but shy if he doesnt know you

Hes got an anxiety disorder but hes still living his best life

Virgil Ravenwood

Our main Cryptid goth( he dialed it down for the family photo)

Hes twenty one and lives on his own in an apartment complex close to downtown, which is a good 15 to 20 minutes from his childhood home so he visits regularly( like three times every other week)

Boi loves his family to bits, and has so SOOOO many good stories he’ll happily talk about 

Has both his own paranormal youtube channel and a joint youtube channel with his boyfriend Ethen where they explore and investigate haunted places(both well known and stumbled across)

He has the same eye color as their mother, blue violet, which stands out a little more than his dad’s or brother’s

He covers his freckles with foundation because hes insecure about them

Did a year of junior college before deciding school wasnt exactly for him anymore, but still goes to events for his best friend Logan

Works at a cafe downtown that stays open pretty late( they do dinner its almost a diner but not) part time, and the other half does youtube for a living

Has a cat that had to stay in his childhood home named Sally that Andy takes care of for him

Has been considering getting another cat for his apartment

Big firm believer in the unknown and the paranormal/supernatural

Hes wiccan and has an alter in his bedroom thats apart of his facecam background

He has a tarot deck but doesnt really do readings other than little ones for himself, as divination isnt his strong suit

Has a big crystal collection hes been adding to since high school

He can sing but doesnt have alot of confidence in his voice so he just doesnt

And also introducing~

The picani-sanders family! Aka ethen's big ol family

From left to right

Patton Picani

Ethen's older brother(by two years)

Him and ethen are emile's foster kids, but he adopted him when they were like nine and seven.

Patton is 23 and happily works at the library downtown as a librarian and a reader to the kids

He loves music and musicals and all things disney (partially thanks to his boyfriend roman)

He and Ethen come off as complete opposites and they have a very playful relationship, always teasing each other 

He loves his family alot and loves babysitting his little brother Thomas whenever his schedule allows it, especially during times of year Emile and Remy get swamped with work

He loves to knit and sew and make things!!! He makes sweaters and jackets and dresses and customizes clothes!! He could make a living on it if he really wanted!! (but he just does it for friends and loved ones instead- Andy has a hoodie that Patton sew wool on the inside to keep him warm and Andy adores it)

Hes really outgoing and friendly and seems to make friends wherever he goes! 

He’s known Roman since they were kids and was crushing on him all through school until they got together senior year 

He loves to bake and cook and help his dad make dinner whenever hes at home

Hes a sappy romantic and loves cliches

He has a huge collection of stuffed animals that hes been slowly transferring to his and roman’s apartment since he moved out(theres ALOT)

Emile Picani

The dad!! Hes in his mid 50s 

He works as a singular and couples therapist  and can have a bit of a wacky schedule

Hes been raising Patton and Ethen since they were little and loves his kids so damn much

So goddamn supportive of what they do, sometimes to the point its embarrassing(for Ethen)

Hes engaged to Remy Sanders and once their married their just going to combine their last names

He loves cartoons and gardening! And has his own collection of stuffed animals and toys(which hes been sharing with Thomas) 

He loves making dad jokes and him and Patton make them all the time at Ethen

Hes a damn great cook and has been teaching his boys to cook for years now, and loves making big meals 

Not really a strict parent, more of a sit down and talk it out kinda parent

Is part of the PTA of Thomas’s school

Actually used to be a punk in school

Thomas Sanders-Picani

The youngest! Hes 8 years old!

Our boy loves to read and write! He writes tons and tons of stories!

Hes got a huge imagination and likes to daydream

Hes bubbly even though he isnt the most social he still has a good group of friends!

Our lil boi is an actor of course! He loves getting parts in the school plays and in class assignments.

Hes in his schools choir  and gets vocal lessons from Roman’s mama

 His room is filled with toys and books and notebooks and pencils, and even though he tries his best to keep it clean it gets messy every week.(cleaning it is his weekly chore)

He has two best friends named Joan and Talyn that hes been friends with now since kindergarden and theyve been nearly inseperable ever since, its not uncommon for one of both of them to be at each others house on any given weekend

Hes Remy’s kid but has started calling himself by Emile’s last name too since they moved in with the Picani’s

Doesnt have too many memories of his mother but the ones he does have are all happy and pleasant(thankfully)

Calls Emile baba and Remy dada to distinguish them better

Loves his older brothers especially when they play with him, He also loves watching the old videos of Ethen’s theater performances and sometimes pesters him to reenact scenes from them( his favorite is the middle school production of ‘Alice in Wonderland’)

Ethen Picani

Our other main boy, hes also twenty one

He lives with his best and childhood friend Remus Prince in two bedroom apartment across town near the college

Does youtube full time for a living

the “black sheep” of the family as he and Remus call him 

He majored in theater in his two years of college

Loves reptiles but doesnt have any because their apartment complex doesnt allow pets and he doesnt want to get him and remus kicked out since their apartment is close to Remus’s work

Has a car he loving refers to as his “hand me down junk heap” Because he got Patton’s first car when patton got a new one

He loves the old thing though 

Has a good relationship with his parents. He loves his dad Emile and he likes Remy well enough

Him and remy have a very casual, relaxed relationship.( Ex: “ Dad you need to stop letting sleepless bums into the house” “ He’ll stop doing that when he stops letting punk wannabes into his kitchen, now get over here kid.” ) 

Loves his boyfriend Virgil to death and likes to spoil him when he can(even though virgil tells him to save his money for rent)

Hes more of a open skeptic but he’ll happily debate things with Virgil, and enjoys making videos for their joint youtube channel and being proven otherwise

He also has his own solo youtube channel where he does abandon urban exploration( sometimes with Remus tagging along for the thrill)

Remus has been calling him by the nickname “Dee” since middle school when they played Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum. Remus called him Dee so often he made it stick as a nickname years and years later. He refuses to let it die and Ethen has just accepted his fate

Remy Sanders

Hes around Emile’s age( mid 50′s) and looks the tallest in the family at 6′3

He came into the family later, when the boys were about 20 and 18( when thomas was about 5 or so)

Hes pretty laid back but surprising good at being strict, so he balances out Emile’s parenting style

Hes a divorcee and got guardianship of Thomas, though hes on a friendly and civil relationship with thomas’s mother and takes him to visit her three times a month( theyre currently working out more visitations and possibly thomas staying with his mother a couple weeks every months but thats still in the works)

Hes an insomiac and (usually) works night shifts as a security guard for a security renting business so his working hours can be a little unpredicitble, but he almost always works at least two night shifts and graveyard shifts a week. Hes paid both a salary plus an additional commissions by employers so its well worth it

He spends as much time with his kid and the boys as he can regardless of his wonky sleep schedule

Hes a bit of a tough love kinda person, and hes snarky and mouthy and doesnt hesitate to speak his mind

Loves Emile soooo goddamn much he talks about him alot at work to his fellow security guards. Theyre the ones who helped him pick a ring when he proposed actually

Oh yeah the two are engaged did I mention that?

He fuels Emile’s plushie collecting, even if he knows he probably shouldnt( But oh well, it makes him smile and thats all he wants to see)

Looks punk now but he was the biggest straight laced prep in highschool that comparing him now to him in highschool gives you whiplash

Would fucking die for his family. No one messes with his fiance or his kids, he doesnt care if two of them are fully capable adults 

And its done!! Two of the four main families is finished!

And watch out because im also coloring these digitally(its just taking awhile :/) but those will be getting posted soon...I hope...Im trying

But here you go Virgil’s and Ethen’s families in two cute family photos!

Let me just add im so fucking proud of The Picani-Sanders photo because it was a struggle to fit them all in the picture and get the heights right and the entire side of my arm was grey with pencil lead by the time I was done but it turned out great!

Up next is Roman and Remus’s family the Princes and Logan’s family the Daniels!! 

Art references are credited to @the-pastel-peach​ @aimasup​ and @underdog-arts​ , especially @aimasup​ and @underdog-arts​ for getting 8 year old thomas to look like a kid because im not normally good at drawing little kids but after practicing with some of their art as my reference and inspiration he turned out really well!! 

I hope you guys enjoy!!

Taglist

@phantommoonpeople

@sweetsweetemo

@leesacrakon

@amazable01

@starbucks-remy

@jemthebookworm

@max-is-tired

@seriously-a-dragon

@sar-kasstic

@soupspam

@aimasup

@sugarglider9603

@underdog-arts

@strawberryjellystuff

[skyflyinginaction]

Shinhiro Aragaki Transulations from the Persona 3 Portable Fanbook

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[handwritten title at top] Gaki-san Cafeteria

Profile Name: Shinjiro Aragaki Sex: Male Birthday: 1991/8/11 [This profile uses year/month/day format.] Blood type: A Group: Gekkoukan Academy Upper Class Year 3 Class C (Suspended) Club: Unaffiliated

Ugh...  Me? Having a blog? So lame... Still, everyone's doing it, so I figured I'd give it a shot. Dunno what's with the goofy title. I'm just gonna write whatever I want. So uh, maybe gimme some ideas for posts?

Well... Might as well pass the time while I'm here. Anyway... enjoy?

Favorite Sites: [banners] A Dog's Heart [in snail] Sea slug [to right] Umiushi Family Cooking [white text, bottom right] Official Site

[large white text below blog page] I'm keeping my eyes peeled. Because there's an unimaginable way back...

[main body]

Aragaki, the lone wolf who sticks out like a sore thumb at nightly meetings, is from the same orphanage as Sanada. Three years ago, Aragaki was a member of the Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad, where Sanada awakened the power of Persona within him. However, he wasn't able to fully control his powers. One day, a horrible accident occurred and a number of people were driven mad. Aragaki's Persona went berserk and snatched away the life of an innocent bystander. Despondent, Aragaki dropped out of school and began aimlessly roaming the streets at night. In order to restrain his Persona ability, whenever Aragaki is faced with danger, he takes a suppressant drug - although it has its side effects. Aragaki only returned to the SEES to bear his past deeds. Aragaki gave his life as a final apology to those tied to the past and unable to move forward, saying: "I'm the only one who deserves to rot in hell."

[at bottom:]

Shinjiro Aragaki

[left column]

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Like A Whole Nother World

Category: Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad 2009/9/3 (Thu) 23:18

People are taking my return to the SEES really nicely... What the hell happened. Back when it was just me and Aki and Kirijo, the lounge felt way too big... But with all the new members, it's stuffed. Girls, a little kid, and even a dog... Some real variety in this lineup. Did Aki and Kirijo just get swept up in all that?

And on top of that, they're all treating me real good, even though they barely know me. The 2nd years think I bailed their asses out at the meeting place, when really I was just chasing off some pests. Either way, they're being real nice to me.

I don't bother with school or club activities or whatever, so I can focus all my energy on battle. Hit me up whenever you're heading off to Tartarus. I mean, that's why I came back here in the first place.

COMMENT Comments (4) ・ Trackback (0)

2009/9/4 (Fri) 01:23 JUN☆P-

Never gonna forget the hero at the meeting spot, dude. You totally bailed us out. With Aragaki-san on our side, we're like a hundred-man army!

2009/9/4 (Fri) 18:51 Yukaricchi♥

So you helped found the club, Aragaki-senpai... Thank you so much for saving us. I think you might actually be a really good guy, deep down...?

2009/9/4 (Fri) 21:00 Aigis

Koromaru-san reports that you often give him treats. It seems you two have become fast friends. Aragaki-san, you are rather reserved.

2009/9/4 (Fri) 23:06 Gaki

Oh come on, are you guys really kicking things off with a bunch of embarrassing comments? Hundred-man army, good guy... Don't just make stuff up about me. Ugh, I dunno how to deal with this.

[righthand column]

Boy's & Girl's Event

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Escapade

Category: Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad 2009/9/6 (Sun) 21:55

Under the full moon, a Shadow appeared, as promised. I hang out at Escapade plenty, but this time everyone on the floor was complaining about the power being on the fritz. I guess that was an omen or something that a Shadow was about to appear. Can't let things like that slip you by.

But man, there were some real annoying tagalongs last night. Junpei thought he was gonna party his ass off, the poor guy. That chick from Strega was totally stringing him along, but Junpei still managed to be worried about her. Maybe I'm being too harsh, but pure-hearted guys like him are the ones that fall for that kind of thing.

But still, the chick's Persona was really something... Might be worth worrying about. I think I'll pop my head into the hospital too.

[screenshot:]

Junpei Iori

Hey, uh... I just wanna know one thing... Was that really all just an act?

COMMENT Comments (4) ・ Trackback (0)

2009/9/6 (Sun) 22:23 Yukaricchi♥

I mean, Junpei's so unsubtle about things like this... I bet he's going to visit at the hospital again today. Maybe if Junpei keeps talking to her, Chidori-san will start to open her heart... Or maybe I'm naive for even thinking that?  

Boy's & Girl's Event

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Passing the Persona Torch

Category: Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad 2009/9/15 (Tue) 22:36

Man, you guys are a real pain. Though I guess I can't be so quick to judge if Koro-chan hangs with you...

⬤ Questions From Persona Users ⬤

1. How did it feel when your Persona awakened?

I don't remember anything from back then...

2. What did you think when you saw your Persona?

Don't really care, that's just how he looks. He's Aki's Persona's brother. I mean, me and Aki go way back. You couldn't separate us even if you tried.

3. What's your favorite attacking strategy?

I'm not a big fan of whittling enemies down bit by bit. Better to give 'em one big hit and knock 'em dead, all in one go.

4. Any Shadows you have trouble with?

I don't got any weak points. I mean, if your Persona is weak, that just means your heart is weak.

5. What do you want to do when we're done fighting?

Hell if I know. I just want to take responsibility for what I've done. I think I'm just about there. After that... Aki, it's your turn.

COMMENT Comments (4) ・ Trackback (1)

2009/9/15 (Wed) 19:47 Aki

So it's my turn... Got it. Shinji, it may very well be because of my influence that the power of Persona was awakened within you...

[left column]

Boys & Girl's Event

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What Are You Weirdos, a Cosplay Group?

Category: Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad 2009/9/16 (Wed) 22:58

Come on... I am not gonna participate in your little cosplay thing. The bus stop was one thing, but this time you　want me to wear a tailcoat? What? Is that a butler costume? Like I'm gonna play some servant role.

Oh, and when we're going off to Tartarus, don't expect me to act like we're going on a picnic, or whatever. When a Shadow pops out, I want to look like a grown-up warrior. We didn't get this far by being stylish.

I mean, if you're fighting to win, then I'll quit whining. Just don't mess around too much. And don't forget that lives are on the line.

COMMENT Comments (4) ・ Trackback (0)

2009/9/17 (Thu) 19:48 Yukaricchi♥

Please don't call us all "weirdos"! Our leader is the one who's into dressing up. I'm a victim too.

2009/9/17 (Thu) 22:39 JUN☆P-

That's the first time I've seen you hatless, Aragaki-san. ...And your head looks totally normal. So disappointing...

2009/9/17 (Fri) 19:29 Aki

I've never brought this up, but... Junpei, what do YOU look like with your hat off? I mean, even when you went swimming at the beach, you refused to take it off.

2009/9/17 (Fri) 21:46 Gaki

What kind of weird ideas are you having about people's heads... Hey Aki, meet me at the strategy room for a tactical debriefing on stealing Junpei's hat.

[right column] Boy's & Girl's Event Public Post

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Haven't Seen a Movie In Ages

Category: Posts 2009/9/23 (Wed) 22:26

Man, I haven't been to the movies in ages. It's a lot nicer to go on your own, but... Well, if you're inviting me, you must be kind of a weirdo. I guess I don't mind coming along though, kills some time.

But like, did you pick that movie on purpose? "Woof-Meow Kingdom"... We were surrounded by family, made me weirdly sweaty. And the climactic scene where they got dragged in the river... That was... Well, whatever...

Right, I need to give Koro-chan the special dog food and assorted bones I got on the way home. The leash we use on walks is filthy, so maybe I should get a new one, too... Oh, and I'm going to give him a bath later tonight. Shoot, I forgot to get a massage brush...

Anyway, do you think Koro-chan's good at doggy paddling? Never know when something bad might happen around water...

[screenshot:]

> Somehow, Aragaki's eyes seem red...

COMMENT Comments (3) ・ Trackback (0)

2009/9/24 (Thu) 10:00 Aigis

Koromaru-san is profoundly moved by your exceptional treatment of him, Aragaki-san.

2009/9/24 (Thu) 19:13 Fuu＊ka

Aragaki-senpai, you're a real animal lover, aren't you? Nobody who likes animals is a bad person, or so they say. I'll have to cook up something nice for Koro-chan too!

[advertisement:]

Garlic ・　Olive Oil ・ Pepperoncini

Paella

Family Cooking

Airing Weekly, Sunday 7 PM SMATV Network Kismet Publishing

September edition of the textbook now on sale. If not at your local bookstore, go here → to order online.

[button:] I Want It!

[left column]

Boys & Girl's Event Public Post

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Evening Walk

Category: Posts 2009/9/26 (Sat) 23:14

You guys keep going off about how taking a walk at night soothes the soul, and I kinda have to agree. I used to kill time at night by hanging out in back alleys or clubs, but I guess it's not so bad doing something more healthy with my evenings. And this is so weird, but taking a nice walk makes me want to make dinner for Koro-chan.

It's fall and everything's being harvested, which makes it the season for eating. You guys need to remember to eat up and stay healthy. Or else you're gonna end up bedridden, like our leader was. What would you even do if a shadow popped out then? Well, I guess everything's going good on that front, so it's fine for now. Just remember to get a nice square meal in every day.

[screenshot]

Shinjiro Aragaki

You hungry? I'll fix you something when we get home.

Girl's Event Public Post

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The Trick to Cooking

Category: Cooking 2009/9/27 (Sun) 23:47

Fall's the season for eating, but I don't think that fancy kitchen we have is getting any use. The fridge is full of sports drinks and milk, the cupboards are crammed with protein shakes and cup noodles and junk food... It's messed up. Do you people seriously never cook? We didn't even have a good set of utensils, so I brought some in. Yamagishi's the only one who seems excited about cooking, but she doesn't have the basics down yet. Don't get me wrong, enthusiasm's great, but...

Well, if you've heard someone say that cooking is an act of love, it probably came from someone who's mastered their basics. Doesn't matter how much love you pour into your cooking, if you mess up some fundamental part, it's not gonna taste good. A super common mistake beginners make is ignoring what the recipe says and improvising instead. Get your basics down pat, then you can switch things up. Remember, you don't gotta rush it. Doesn't matter what you're doing, taking it one step at a time is key.

COMMENT Comments (2) ・ Trackback (0)

2009/9/28 (Mon) 18:51 Fuu＊ka

Aragaki-senpai, thank you... You put it pretty bluntly, but you're trying to help, aren't you? I'll start working my way up with simple things like onigiri. If you'd like, feel free to come sample my work?

2009/9/28 (Mon) 19:52 Mitsuru

Aragaki, I'm rather surprised at how good you are at cooking. I wouldn't say you surpass my family's professional chef, but your food was indeed exquisite. Perhaps eating together with everyone isn't so bad, every once in a while.

[right column]

Girl's Event

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Making Things Right

Category: Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad 2009/10/3 (Sat) 02:45

[screenshot]

Shinjiro Aragaki

...They're in your hands now. I believe in you.

[post body]

So tomorrow's the long-awaited full moon, huh. And you know another huge Shadow's gonna pop out. But I never thought the full moon would fall on tomorrow's date, of all days... I can't bring myself to call it a coincidence.

It's not like I think I won't be coming back, but with what I have in the palm of my hand... Well, I can't tell if it's a coincidence or a cruel prank. And the whole time I sit here agonizing about it, the pocketwatch in my palm keeps on ticking. If I had to name the one thing I can never change, it'd be my past self. Who's bound by their past now? It's not just me... So, the only thing left for me to do is to make things right. Because no matter what I choose, I don't got much time left...

I'm not gonna write anything more here, I promise. You don't have to forgive me for my selfishness. And no matter what happens, don't you dare cry...

COMMENT Comments (5) ・ Trackback (0)

2009/10/7 (Wed) 18:36 Fuu＊ka

Aragaki-senpai, they said you wouldn't wake up... When I first read this post, I didn't get it at all, but... Looking back, I think you knew what you were about to do...

2009/10/7 (Wed) 20:28 Mitsuru

Of course I was aware of the situation between Aragaki and Amada. It was a failing on my part that it came to this. From hereafter, the Kirijo family will dedicate all available resources to his medical care. Perhaps Aragaki's strong spirit will grant us a sliver of hope...

2009/10/8 (Thu) 01:36 JUN☆P-

I know you were ready to give your life in this battle, but... Now that it's actually happened, it hurts like hell... Aragaki-san, please wake up...

2009/10/8 (Thu) 20:38 Aki

When I thought Shinji was all but gone, he whispered, "This is what I wanted." While some may dismiss his way of making things right, I would not count myself among them. Everyone, we need to face forward!

2009/10/9 (Fri) 18:46 Amadaman

I've decided to keep fighting here. Until Aragaki-san returns, I will protect his place.

[bubble at top left]

If You Get Into A Relationship...

Social links with Aragaki don't turn romantic until you max out your S. Link rank with him. But once you do get to max, if you call him one more time, you can have the protagonist confess to him. After a short period of heated questioning, you can enter Aragaki's room. Acting much unlike the Aragaki you've seen so far, he will embrace the protagonist and make an unexpectedly bold move. While it's quite the mushy event, if you do get in a relationship, he'll actually be quite assertive. By the way, the protagonist confesses to him in the dorm lounge. If you think about it, Yukari and Junpei and all the other members would be right next to them the whole time...

[screenshot:]

Shinjiro Aragaki

You're uh... not married, so don't get this wrong, but...

[bubbles at top right]

Sun Mon Tue Wed Thur Fri Sat Break

[center of circle:] Shinjiro Aragaki

[by tarot card:] Moon

[spiky bubble at bottom:] Shinjiro Aragaki

[to left of portrait, beneath "Persona capable to summon once Moon's commu rank reaches the max:]

Sandalphon, the Angel That Conveys Prayers

[tag labeled 27]

From the Iwatodoi Dormitory Lounge ......Edition 27

[junpei:] Man, Aragaki-san's cooking is the best. [koro:] Woof!! [aegis:] Koromaru-san says he enjoys it too. [aragaki:] H, hey. You guys suck at eating balanced meals. Try to take care of yourselves. [mitsuru:] I agree completely. Akihiko could stand to eat something aside from gyudon. [Rice with beef and vegetables.] [sanada:] I, I eat more than just gyudon! I get plenty of protein shakes in too!

[next column] [mitsuru:] Ugh... You're giving me a headache. [junpei:] Gyudon and protein shakes and nothing else... That's uh, really... [aragaki:] Don't act like you're any different. You basically live off cup ramen. Balance your diet. [junpei:] Uh, well... I uh, how do I put this, just like, think it's good... [fuuka:] Okay, I'll keep balance in mind and cook something up! [aragaki] How about you focus on learning how to cook, first. ...Although, you can go ahead and start practicing.

[vertical line of text in center:]

Brotherly Lines

[column on right]

S. Link Rank 3 Female Protagonist

Look at the balance in these meals... Do you guys live off this...?

S. Link Rank 4 Female Protagonist

...You're not going to leave those vegetables on your plate, are you?

S. Link Rank 7 Female Protagonist

Get some good sleep. ...'Night.

S. Link Rank 9 Female Protagonist

Feels like I got a place to come home to.

S. Link MAX Female Protagonist

Now that you're here, I don't have a care in the world...

[screenshot to left:] Shinjiro Aragaki

Does everyone here eat like crap...?

[block labeled Girl's Side] Like An Older Brother

Shinjiro Aragaki always makes sure his fellow club members make it home safe. While he comes off as rather blunt, he's actually deeply worried about everyone's unhealthy eating habits. Following the protagonist's advice, he throws a party. While putting everything together for the party, he teaches Fuuka (who is hopeless at cooking) how to cook. Drawn by the smell, their dormmates gather, and the lounge springs to life. While everyone enjoys the meal, Aragaki steps out for a bit, and asks the protagonist for a private chat. Then, gazing at the protagonist with a gentle smile, he says, "I'm leaving Sanada and everyone else in your hands."

[screenshot to right:]

Aegis

Koromaru-san is distraught.

[caption below screenshot:] Even Koromaru-san can tell how bad Fuuka's cooking is. But with Aragaki teaching her, she'll be able to make delicious food someday.

TRANSULATIONS NOT MINE THEY ALL BELONG TO THE LOVELY (https://kasael.tumblr.com) ALL CREDIT OF THIS ENTIRE TRANSULATION BELONGS TO THEM NOT ME DON’T REBLOG WITHOUT CREDITING THEM FIRST.

[web-of-fics]

The Real Story

Requested by: anon (“can you do one where reader is a reporter and Spider-Man breaks into their office because he doesn’t like what they’re writing?”)

Starring: Peter Parker x reader

Fandom: MCU

Warnings: none

Summary: Reader is a reporter whose perspective changes when she receives a visit from her favorite subject.

Words: 1317

✎_____________________________________________________________________

It was an average workday when you walked into your office that cloudy morning. You pitched your article to the editor-in-chief and he waved you ahead to get started because he wants it done yesterday.

You sat at your desk, grateful you’d already gathered the photo evidence for your story. You pulled them up on your ancient computer one-by-one, deciding which one to include with your piece.

You took your time zooming in on each one, scrolling across the blur of green leaves, indistinguishable concrete, and finally, the red masked face of your anonymous subject.

Well, the subject itself wasn’t entire anonymous. Everybody knew the mask of Spider-Man. The only caveat was the fact no one knew his face. Your hope in writing weekly pieces about the masked vigilante was to attract more eyewitness reports. You could only be your own source for so long before you got tired of hopping on your bike with a camera and a notepad to follow his antics every night and day.

You selected the photo that outlined his figure best, with a small hope that someone—a mother, father, partner, sibling—anyone would come forward and say “hey! You know that Spider-Man guy you keep writing about? I think I know him! His name is...”

Thus far this hope was to no avail. So you sat, in your too-cold office with your too-abrasive boss and your too-gossipy coworkers day in and day out. If only they would gossip about something other than so-and-so’s promiscuous exploits from that weekend. If you overheard another word of it you were sure you would slam your face onto your keyboard.

You got up and wrestled the window behind your chair open. The hug of a warm breeze drifted through almost instantly. You inhaled deeply, then set to work. If you had this done by the afternoon it could make tomorrow’s publication.

When you looked up from your screen a few minutes later you found yourself at a total loss of words to see Spider-Man himself standing in your office. The door remained closed behind him. It has a terrible squeak to it that you knew you would have heard if he’d opened it.

In a wild moment you looked at the open window behind you and attempted to visualize him climbing through. You supposed it was possible.

You turned back to him, trying to decipher the mix of emotions coursing through you and the possible reasons he had for coming.

“Hello,” you said, figuring that was a safe place to start.

“Are you y/f/n y/l/n?” he demanded.

“I am,” you said cooly, wondering if you could possibly say anything to interest him in providing an exclusive interview. “Would you like to sit down?” You gestured to a nearby chair as your mind reeled. When he hesitated you pulled your own chair in closer to the desk and clasped your hands.

He obliged, dragging an armchair up effortlessly and sitting in it so straight it was as if he had a plank tied to his back. This was not a social call from an admirer.

“You have to stop writing about me,” he said. “Please,” he added charmingly.

You cocked your head. “Why is that?”

He sighed and glanced around the room. “What you’re saying about me... isn’t the truth. And all your speculations have people trying to unmask me or whatever while I’m trying to help people!” His tone escalated. “I can’t save people from muggings or accidents if they’re just grabbing at my face. This—“ he clutched at his mask and you noticed for the first time the strange material it was made from, “doesn’t even come off unless I do it!”

Your heart skipped when for a moment you expected him to reveal his face right then and there.

“I see,” you said. Your heart hammered in your chest and you had to remind yourself you were in control of the situation. Although as the minutes passed it was clear it was less and less up to you. You glanced behind him, amazed no one spotted the bright red-and-blue jumpsuit through your tiny office window and came to investigate. You swallowed, hoping your voice wouldn’t crack when you spoke next.

“How about this?” Your throat was completely dry. “You let me interview you this one time and get your whole story from your perspective—you don’t have to tell me anything about who you are” you added, “just Spider-Man. Tell me who the real Spider-Man is and I’ll publish it so I can call it quits on the Spider-Man stakeout column.” You put your hand out. “Friends?”

His mask was an asset to the poker face game he otherwise did not possess, and you were greatly intimidated by it. You were certain if your heart attempted to beat any faster you would collapse. You coughed into your arm to cover your discomfort.

He put his hand out and as you shook he said “you have an hour.”

“Great!” You pulled a notepad from your desk and held a pen above it.

“The real story, huh?” he said and laughed nervously. You nodded, putting the pen to paper and wondering what he was possibly nervous about.

It’s not like his secret identity was on the line or anything.

He began to speak—or more accurately, word vomit. Any reporter’s dream celebrity interviewee. But you didn’t write down a word of it. And he didn’t just talk for hour. After a few of the initial one-sided interview questions, the conversation morphed into one between comrades without either of you realizing it in the way lobsters don’t realize they’re in boiling water until it’s too late. It was too late for either of you to go back to your previous feelings for one another. Now you couldn’t help but at least like one another. You were not yet friends, but amicable allies learning to understand one another.

It was dark outside by the time a hearty knock came at the door, followed by shouts from your boss asking about your article that snapped you both out of your stupor. Without a word, Spider-Man leapt through the window and dangled below it while you shouted back at your boss, promising the story to be finished by morning. He yelled that everyone else was heading home for the night and stomped away. You hurriedly peeked back out the window. Spider-Man clung to the side of the wall. He looked up, gave a nod and a wave, and shot off in search of crime.

You took the liberty of making yourself some coffee in the now-empty office, relishing in the absence of mindless coworkers as you returned to your desk and began typing. You didn’t stop until the sun rose, delivering a finalized copy to your boss’ desk and adding one to your personal archive cabinet before taking off for the day.

About a block from your apartment you decided to stop for breakfast at a local café. The last-minute decision combined with the sleep deprivation caused you to bump into someone on the street.

“I’m so sorry!” you babbled, retrieving the papers the unfortunate passerby has dropped.

“It’s okay!” the passerby replied.

You held out the paper for them, recognizing it as your newspaper as they took it from you.

“Hey, I wrote that article,” you said excitedly, recognizing your latest Spider-Man photo.

“Oh really? That’s cool,” they said.

“Yeah,” you said, still gazing at it.

You did a double-take.

“Hang on,” you took the paper back, scanning the contents more closely.

Heat crept up the back of your neck and your heart began to pound. The sound of the surrounding street traffic evaporated.

You slowly looked up at the person standing before you, your hands clutching the crumpled paper that read:

Spider-Man: The Real Story

And looked into the bare face of the real Spider-Man.

_______________________________________________________________________

Just one more before bed? Click here for a masterlist of my fics!

[kamihoshi]

Sakura and their assistant (and fellow mangaka) Risapaso were interviewed together for Creator’s Voice by Rikiya Kurimata. I don’t think Sakura’s ever done an interview so this was a surprise. Sakura talks a bit about aiming to become a mangaka and all things Yugami.

As this is a Yugami-centric blog, I’m only going to translate the questions and answers related to either the series or Sakura.

Apologies for any mistakes made (there are bound to be some), they are not my intent.

(Note: The interviewer’s name is listed as his nickname 仕掛け番長 but screw it, I’m just gonna call him by his real name. And since I have no idea what gender either Sakura or Risapaso are I’m just gonna use “they” as the pronoun.)

Jun Sakura ✖ Risapaso Interview: Connected by Yugami-kun

A love of drawing since childhood

Rikiya Kurimata: Alright, first question, what made each of you decide you wanted to become a mangaka? Sakura-sensei, you can start, if you please.

Jun Sakura: There wasn’t a particular event that made me want to do it but I’ve liked drawing ever since kindergarten. That never changed and in elementary school, I’d draw manga all over my notebooks.

RK: You were drawing original stuff from the start?!

JS: It was nothing that spectacular, just stuff like copying Doraemon. I remember doing the same with other manga I liked in my later years of elementary school.

RK: Did you like making your own stories back then?

JS: ............Probably, I guess?

RK: That was a long pause (laughs).

RK: What was it like when you were aiming to become a mangaka?

JS: I worked a side job in my hometown at the time. I’d get home from work dead tired and fall asleep before even drawing manga (laughs). After saving up some money from working, I quit my job and started working as an assistant for a mangaka who was publishing in a monthly magazine in my area. As a monthly assistant, you really need to have another job or else you don’t have many days where you’re actually working, so my living expenses were tight at the time but I figured I’d draw manga while living off my savings.

JS: I submitted my work to a competition and even though I didn’t win, I got a call from an editor at Shogakukan who wanted to work with me. After that I was told, “Draw whatever you want” and what I came up with ended up getting selected. It was decided that I’d debut so I moved to Tokyo and got to draw a number of oneshots while working as an assistant for a weekly magazine but I just couldn’t think of a storyboard for a series no matter how much I tried. I drew my last idea thinking I’d go back home if it didn’t get accepted. That was Yugami-kun ni wa Tomodachi ga Inai.

RK: Alright, thank you! Next, Risapaso-san, please.

[...]

RK: Risapaso-san is currently also an assistant to you, Sakura-san. How’s their work?

JS: They’re very dependable and always draw up these awesome backgrounds for me. It makes my art look so much better (laughs)! They’re a real pro and very reliable.

Risapaso: You flatter me.

RK: I think a lot of people aren’t aware of what assistants do - could you fill us in?

RP: I guess you can say we help give form to the what the author envisions. Sakura-sensei basically gives me a drawing as a rough guideline and using that as a base, I draw in the details.

RK: Ah, so you have to be able to read what the author wants and help them complete the drawing! That takes the skill of a professional!

JS: Yes. I'll ask them to spruce a panel up for me and they’ll give me a draw up a really nice backdrop for me.

RK: Sakura-san, what do you think of Risapaso-san’s series, Garyayama Poyomi no Kataomoi?

JS: The black humor and twists are really great! Whether it’s being comedic or serious, it surprises me, like, “That’s how it plays out?!” It betrays my expectations in a good way and the developments are so engaging. Even when the mood becomes serious, it’s well-balanced so I have nothing but glowing thoughts after reading it. Likewise, even when the story gets dark and heavy, there’s always a bit of comedy afterwards. I really like how it’s able to flip the mood back like that. I’m eager to see what happens next.

RK: And how about your thoughts on Yugami-kun ni wa Tomodachi ga Inai?

RP: I love it. I really like Yugami for how he’s the complete opposite of your typical shounen manga protagonist - acting not for the sake of those around him but for himself.

RK: For sure. When Yugami-kun ni wa Tomodachi ga Inai first came out, there weren’t many protagonists like Yugami. I think as the series got popular, we’ve seen an increase in them. How did you come up with Yugami-kun?

JS: It was born from a conversation I had with my editor. We were talking about people that were oddballs yet could also be strangely likable and that’s when I realized there are actually tons of people like that all around me, myself included. I took a bunch of those different aspects, pieced them all together bit-by-bit and made it into a manga.

RK: Wow, from a random chat like that?! When the first volume (of Yugami-kun) came out, my bookstore colleagues talked about it a lot. They were surprised at how well it sold. I think it really changed our image of a shounen manga protagonist and because you modeled the characters after people you know, that might be why a lot of the characters feel so real.

[...]

RK: And do you use Twitter too, Sakura-san?

JS: I do, but I’m no good at social media. I never know what to tweet. I've been like this since my student days so I’m probably just not suited for it. Yugami-kun is being rerun on Sunday Webry right now so I use Twitter to get the series out there while adding some of my own commentary on it. But I’m so stuck on what to say that it takes about three hours just to write three lines...

RK: Three hours?! That time ought to go to working on your manuscript, no? (laughs) But since you’re serializing in a magazine, you must get some fan mail, correct?

JS: Yes! Getting fan mail is so encouraging. I feel bad that I can’t return the favor with anything but new year’s cards... But I treasure every letter I get. When I’m feeling tired, I read them over again and they cheer me right up. Some senders have been writing to me since they were students and as time’s passed, they’ve sent me letters telling me they’ve gotten married. It feels like I’ve really gotten to know these people through their letters.

RK: Well then, Sakura-san, is there a particular chapter of Yugami-kun that sticks out in your mind?

JS: There was a moment when I was drawing up the draft storyboards and felt like I finally understood the characters. So in Yugami-kun, there’s an arc where the hero and heroine sever ties with one another. I wrote it without deciding how the two of them would make up. All I knew was that it would end with them reconciling and I forged ahead without deciding how it’d happen. But once I started drafting the storyboard, the chapter just wouldn’t go the way I wanted it to. Even if the story ended there, it wasn’t over for the characters. Characters were saying things they’d never say and things just didn’t feel right.

JS: I have a habit of cutting up parts of my storyboard drafts and reassembling them and in that mountain of papers was the heroine’s smile. Suddenly it hit me, “Ah, this is it!” and the somewhat sombre end of that arc did a complete turnaround. Just by picking up one piece of scrap from my drafts, all the other aspects of that chapter I was struggling with started to click as I pieced everything together like a puzzle. Like, “Oh, so that’s what he was thinking?” It felt like the characters were guiding me. It took a while to go through all of it but part of me drew the storyboard wanting to know how they all ticked.

RK: It sounds like the characters came to life in that moment!

JS: I discussed it with my editor beforehand but when I went to draw the chapter, something about the characters just seemed off so I submitted a completely different storyboard from the one I discussed with my editor, rewritten even though I’d already gotten the OK for the previous draft... I’m nothing but grateful to my editor for letting me make those changes.

RK: Thank you for all the work you put into this series! Well then, are there any manga you’d like to recommend?

JS: My friend told me I should read Ousama Ranking (King Ranking) by Sousuke Toka. It’s great; it has a kind of warmth to its style like a children’s story but also has these intense scenes that feel straight out of a shounen manga. A lot of times I’ve cried reading it. I love how multifaceted the characters are. Re-reading it and reflecting on the characters thoughts and actions with that hindsight never gets old.

[...]

RK: Finally, is there anything you’d like to say to your fans?

JS: Yugami-kun was really only slated to run for one volume with five chapters but it received a lot of positive feedback on reader surveys so it was given a second volume, and then the first volume got a reprint... And on and on, that cycle repeated. It’s thanks to all of your support that the series is still going and I’m forever grateful. When I was drawing Chapter 1, I’d thought of the ending by then but writing the story up to that point wasn’t possible so I figured that at its slated end, I’d show how the characters had grown in that time frame. But thanks to everyone, it looks like Yugami-kun will be fortuitous enough to finally have the ending I’d envisioned. I’ll be doing my best to make the rest of the ride enjoyable, so I’d be happy if you stuck with me.

[...]

RK: Thank you for doing this, you two!

Notes

Some of the oneshots Sakura has written in the past (all before Yugami began serialization):

こなた彼方の箒星 Konata Kanata no Houkiboshi

ぼくらのヒーロー Bokura no Hero / Our Hero

サンスポット！ Sunspot!

＆スマイリー &Smiley

The development Sakura mentions about Yugami and Chihiro severing ties with one another is a reference to chapters 56-58.

[boreum-dal]

la confiture, pt. i

fandom: miraculous ladybug (adrinette, nino/alya)

summary: marinette dupain-cheng is one step closer to her dream of becoming a top chef when she’s hired to cook at the famed restaurant, la confiture. but to get to the top, she’s got to surpass adrien agreste, her rival and the son of la confiture’s owner.

too bad he’s so sweet that he’s nearly impossible to dislike.

and too bad she loves when he invites her over after work to test out new dishes at his apartment.

and too bad his relationship with his father makes her want to hold him and never let him go.

and–just like that, her dreams don’t seem so simple anymore.

cross-posted: ao3

Marinette had nearly forgotten about the fruit tarts. When she’d first seen them on the new menu for the week, she’d wondered, somewhat wildly, if Adrien secretly read her blog; after all, he’d introduced that dish into the dessert menu only two days after she’d posted about her fruit tarts. But even given Ladybug Patisserie’s immense popularity, she couldn’t imagine that Adrien Agreste, sous chef at one of the top restaurants in the country, found the time or the energy to read the weekly exploits of someone who couldn’t bake to save her life. It had to be a coincidence.

Adrien grinned, surveying the room. His eyes paused when they met Marinette’s. His head tilted to the side, and his lips quirked up ever so slightly at the corners, as if he were sharing a private joke with her that no one else in the room would understand. For a brief few seconds, Marinette felt the air leave her lungs, and then she blinked and forced herself to turn her attention back to her linguine.

It had to be a coincidence, she thought again to herself. Still, she was suddenly grateful she’d kept herself anonymous on the blog all these months.

la confiture

part i.

“Everything sucks.”

“It does not. You’re so dramatic sometimes.”

Marinette Dupain-Cheng lifted her head from her arms and aimed a glower at her best friend. “Do you have room to talk?”

Alya Césaire shrugged, shuffling mangled, dull looking eclairs that around on Marinette’s counter in a way that would have been quite aesthetically pleasing if the eclairs themselves weren’t so ugly. “I can admit it, at the very least.”

“Fine! I’m dramatic! But why can’t I be dramatic and good at baking?”

“Practice makes perfect,” Alya sang, lifting her camera up to her eye and squinting through the lens at the perfectly arranged, deformed eclairs.

“You’ve told me that a million times before,” Marinette moaned, dragging her feet to the love seat in her living room and flopping down into it. “How about a different proverb?”

“Fine, then. Some people just can’t have everything. How about that?” The camera clicked several times.

“Well, that’s just rude and discouraging.” Marinette blew a strand of hair out of her face.

Alya finally looked up from her camera and laughed. “Why are you so down on yourself, Mari? This kind of stuff is gold! You get tens of thousands of hits on your blog every time you post something new. Being bad at baking is your lifeblood. You should own it.”

“I don’t want to be bad at baking, though! I could be the best cook in Paris, but I can’t expect to ever make sous chef at La Confiture when I can’t even bake a cookie without burning it.”

Alya raised an eyebrow. “You really think you can beat Gabriel Agreste’s own son out of the position?”

Marinette pursed her lips grumpily. “I could if I had the baking part down. In a couple of years. Maybe.”

Alya shook her head and resumed taking photos. “I don’t get it. I’d much rather run a successful blog with thousands of followers than be a star chef at some boring restaurant.”

“It’s not just a restaurant, Alya!”

“I know, I know. It’s La Confiture.” Alya made a gagging motion.

“Whatever. You were salivating over that silk pie slice I brought you the other night,” Marinette said, walking back over to the counter and picking up an eclair. She took a bite and had to tug a little at the pastry with her teeth to get it to break. The pastry was rubbery and tough in her mouth, but the cream filling was pleasant, at least. She made a mental note to emphasize that on her upcoming blog post.

Alya grinned. “Didn’t you tell me Adrien Agreste made that pie for the staff?”

Marinette threw the half-eaten eclair at Alya’s face.

---

“You look like you need a drink.”

Adrien Agreste gave a weak laugh. “I was hoping you’d notice without my having to ask. Just a beer, please.”

Nino Lahiffe cracked the lid off of a green bottle and slid it over the bar to Adrien, who took it gratefully and sipped. Nino returned to wiping down the counters, which he’d gotten back to a relatively clean state after dinner service had finally ended. “What’s got you down?”

“Just tired,” Adrien mumbled, sliding the beer bottle between his hands on the lacquered surface of the bar. “You know, the usual.”

Nino frowned at Adrien’s slumped-over form. Adrien straightened up a little—although he knew Nino wasn’t the type to judge, the way his friend peered at him through the round glasses sitting on the bridge of his nose made him feel particularly scrutinized.

“Did you fight with your dad again?”

Adrien laughed. “That obvious?” He lowered his voice. “Don’t tell anyone, please.”

“Dude. You know I would never,” Nino said reassuringly. He glanced around before opening his own beer bottle. “Cheers.”

“Seriously, though, how did you know?”

Nino shrugged. “Just a guess. I saw him stalk out of here a few minutes ago with murder in his eyes.”

“Do you think any of the other employees saw?”

“Nah. And if they did, it’s not like their first thought would be that he must have had a fight with you. He’s just like that, so it’s not unexpected.”

Adrien laughed again, this time genuinely. The laugh felt good in his stomach, like a medicine. “Thanks, Nino.”

“Anytime. So what was it about this time?”

Adrien leaned against the back of the barstool with a sigh. “He’s upset about that Vogue interview.”

Nino frowned. “How could he be upset about it? Our reservations got booked into next Christmas after it went to publication.”

Adrien saw the printed interview, the crisp black-and-white portrait of him in his chef’s uniform, arms crossed and an uncertain smile on his face, in his mind’s eye, and wanted to retch. “I didn’t expect them to, but they published that line about me wanting to go back to school one day.”

Nino stared at him for a moment before bursting out incredulously, “That’s it? Where you literally just say, ‘I don’t know, it might be nice to go study astrology or something in another life’ or something like that?”

“Astronomy,” Adrien corrected. “And yeah. He said it doesn’t look good when I don’t say my whole heart is in cooking.”

“You were talking about another life. That was the question! ‘What would you do in another life?’” Nino shook his head and took a swig of his beer. “That man is ridiculous. I could never tell him, because he pays me, but he is ridiculous.”

Adrien smiled weakly. “I know. I get that he wants to pass down the business and that I have certain duties and expectations to fulfill because of that, but… I can’t pretend to understand the extremes to which he’ll go.”

Even though Nino did not respond, Adrien felt his friend’s eyes on him, and he suddenly struck with guilt. “But look, Nino, I mean—I… He’s not wrong. I should’ve been more careful, right? It doesn’t look great if I say that I’d rather do something else. It would’ve looked better if I’d said no matter what reality I’m in, this is what I’d like to be doing, don’t you think?”

Nino looked at him with an expression that Adrien couldn’t and didn’t want to place—a cross between exasperation and pity. “Whatever you say, man.”

---

 Adrien dropped his keys on the kitchen counter and immediately undid the top three buttons of his uniform. As he switched on the light, a black cat brushed up against his ankles, nudging its head insistently at his shin until he reached down to pick the cat up.

“Hi, Plagg,” he said, using one finger to scratch affectionately under the cat’s chin. Plagg’s purrs rumbled through Adrien’s chest as he held the cat against himself. “Did you have a long day, too?”

He let Plagg down and turned immediately to the laptop on his island counter, flipping it open and seating himself on one of the stools. When the screen loaded, he pulled up his browser and clicked on the first link he’d saved to his favorites bar. A header that read “Ladybug Patisserie” loaded, and immediately beneath that, the latest post, simply entitled “fruit tarts.”

Adrien felt a stupid grin spread across his face. He’d been hoping for and looking forward to this all evening. Ladybug’s writing describing her baking adventures always read in a sweet and hilarious kind of way that made Adrien feel like he was listening to a favorite song while driving or lying back on a soft mattress after a tough day. Tonight’s entry was no different.

After last week’s disaster with the eclairs, I decided that maybe I was just a little too ambitious about my (hopefully?) burgeoning baking skills. I purposely chose something much easier, by all accounts that the Internet and various cookbooks could provide me: the fruit tart. As one site so aptly states, “Fruit tarts are impressive-looking desserts that are not difficult to make at all.” Perfect! Exactly what I’m looking for! How did they know?

Whoever wrote that post was wrong, because that person has yet to meet me. The fruit tart has four components: the shortcrust, the vanilla cream, the glaze, and the fruit toppings. Please read below to see how I miraculously manage to screw up each and every element of this impressive-looking dessert that everyone in the world but myself is capable of making!

Adrien caught himself chortling loudly as he scrolled through the introductory paragraphs and onto the photos, which showed, in hysterically excellent lighting, Ladybug’s progress as she slowly assembled the elements of the dessert and the spectacular finish: soggy-looking fruit turning to mush over a lumpy vanilla filling that seemed mildly off in color somehow, all in a shortbread crust that had crumbled significantly when she’d removed it from the mold. She hadn’t even gotten to put the glaze on the fruit, as she’d burned it in the pot (also showcased in another well-lit and well-framed photograph).

Adrien laughed delightedly at the conclusion, in which Ladybug lamented her lack of intuition for baking but vowed to be back next Wednesday with something new, as usual. He scrolled back up through the post, trying to identify exactly where she’d gone wrong. Now that he was looking more for technical issues than humor, he could see some glaring problems already. He chewed on his lower lip, wondering if he should mention it to her in the comments. He’d never tried to interact with this faceless heroine who was easily his favorite person on the internet, even if he’d never seen her or met her or knew anything about her, other than that she was a horrible baker with a great sense of humor. But she’d made his day quite a bit brighter, and he thought the least he could do was offer her some simple tips to make this recipe easier next time around. His fingers hovered hesitantly over his keyboard for half a second, and then he began typing in the comments box below the post.

Hi, there, Ladybug. I’m a huge fan of your blog. Baking can feel like a thankless practice, and I admire your ability to keep a sense of humor about it instead of bashing your head into a wall! If you don’t mind, here are a couple of tips from someone who bakes regularly. First, I’m sure you know this already, but it seems like you’re not whisking quickly or often enough when you stir in the egg mixture. Even with a strainer, it’s hard to get a smooth filling without lumps in there if you let the entire bottom of the mixture solidify into cooked egg, which is what I suspect happened. As for the shortcrust, try using a food processor instead of your hands to make the mixture. It might feel less “authentic,” but it’ll get you better results, and no one (except for us) has to know. :)

Adrien paused, wondering if he should leave a name. He thought better of it on the off chance that someone else at La Confiture frequented the blog as well and would call him a know-it-all. His eyes landed on Plagg, who was now fiddling with a toy shaped like a fish that Adrien had bought him two weeks ago.

Thanks as always for your hilarious and uplifting posts. Looking forward to next week’s.

Adrien typed “Chat Noir” into the name box and hit “submit.”

---

Marinette pulled open the double doors of La Confiture with urgency and ran her way through the restaurant toward the kitchen, unraveling her scarf and shrugging off her jacket as she did so. She could already hear the noise of knives hitting cutting boards, pots and pans clanging over the dull roar of numerous conversations overlapping each other as various chefs de partie shouted orders to the commis chefs and porters.

She tried to tamp down her panic. Gabriel Agreste was absolutely unforgiving of tardiness, even when it was for a true emergency; Marinette couldn’t imagine the dressing down she’d receive for being two minutes late just because her doctor’s appointment had run behind. She kicked herself for not just leaving the appointment when she’d first realized she wouldn’t make work in time.

She ran through the kitchen doors and skidded to a stop, scanning it quickly and then breathing a sigh of relief when she did not see Gabriel’s face. Still, Adrien would be responsible for overseeing all the staff when Gabriel was absent, but—

“Ah, Chef Dupain-Cheng. You’ve decided to come in today, after all,” a voice said from beside her, and Marinette jumped so high that she could have touched the ceiling if she’d reached her hand up.

Adrien Agreste chuckled, arms crossed as he came up to her.

“Chef!” Marinette flushed. Even if he wasn’t his father, Marinette didn’t like getting caught being late, particularly by her rival. It made her look lazy and undedicated—the last thing she needed when she wanted to move up the ranks. And she wanted Adrien to consider her as serious competition. “I apologize for arriving late,” she said quickly. “I was at the doctor’s and my appointment ran over the scheduled time—I should have just canceled it—”

“Nonsense,” Adrien said, waving a hand in the air. “No one’s hurting for you arriving a few minutes late. It’ll be our little secret. Just try not to let it happen again when my father is around. He can be pretty scary, as you know. It’s not fun to get yelled at in front of the entire kitchen staff, trust me.”

Marinette stared at him, slack-jawed.

“Everything okay, by the way?”

“H-huh?” Marinette was still too startled by Adrien’s casual response in the face of her tardiness to really process his next question.

“You were at the doctor’s, you said. I hope everything’s okay.”

“Um—oh, yes,” Marinette blurted out. “Just an annual checkup.”

“Oh, good. Well, I’m glad you’re looking after yourself, Chef Dupain-Cheng. Not enough of us do in this profession, which is pretty counterproductive, if you ask me.” Adrien smiled at her. 

“I—” Marinette couldn’t muster up a proper response. What was the proper response? She’d never been spoken to with such… humanity by a superior in the kitchen, at least during working hours, before. The proper response, she supposed, was to shut up and get to work. “Thank you, Chef.”

She scurried toward the locker room to hang up her coat and scarf, willing herself to forget about the exchange with Adrien in its entirety. Gabriel had told her upon hiring her that there wasn’t any room for distraction in his kitchen; although he never mentioned anything about those distractions coming from his own son, Marinette suspected that still wouldn’t really constitute a valid defense.

---

Prep time passed in a quick, stressful blur, and Marinette still felt like she was hardly ready when it came time for the staff to eat before dinner service. She’d been quite prepared to skip the staff meal altogether so she could prepare more, but Mylene, the entremetier, had been insistent that she join the rest of the group.

“You’ve got to eat something,” Mylene had urged her, tugging at Marinette’s sleeve. “A chef who passes out in the middle of dinner service won’t be any good. Come on.”

Marinette took the seat next to Mylene in the posterior dining room where the staff ate their meals before service. The air in the room was jovial, with everyone discussing their plans for the upcoming holiday break as they passed large family-style bowls of pasta and salad from person to person.

Mylene reached toward the bowl of seafood linguine in front of them and began to pull some onto Marinette’s plate. “Hurry and eat, you must be starving! You didn’t have breakfast this morning, right?”

Marinette obediently stuffed a forkful of pasta into her mouth. She was grateful for Mylene’s maternal nature; growing up, Alya had always been the one to look out for Marinette when she needed it, and she realized how fortunate she was to find another figure like her at work.

“All right, everyone, could I please have your attention?” Adrien called, standing up from his seat at the opposite end of the table. “I’d like to run back over tonight’s menu for a moment.”

Marinette glanced up from her bowl. Adrien’s profile glowed with a faint gold lining produced by the already-setting Parisian sun streaming through the windows behind him. He began reciting the day’s dishes with a sense of poise and polished confidence beyond his years, and all eyes and ears in the room were on him now with an almost-reverent level of attentiveness.

Not for the first time, Marinette noted silently that somehow, even though he was not nearly as terrifying as his father, Adrien managed to command the respect of the staff in a way that Gabriel Agreste himself could not. Although she tended to keep her distance from Adrien, if Marinette had to guess, she supposed this had something to do with his kindness—how his energy filled the room with warmth, while conversely, the air seemed chillier when Gabriel spoke.

“Next are scallops from the Calvados coast, pan-seared, served with farofa and sweet red pepper chutney. The final dish before we move on to the cheese course will be honey-roasted duck with candied sweet potatoes, black garlic, and lemon…”

Marinette found herself daydreaming, for what had to be the thousandth time, about what it would be like for her to be the one standing up there, reciting a menu that she had gotten to create herself. She suspected it would take her eons to get to Adrien’s level of adeptness in designing the menu and the grace with which he led the crew, which was a little disheartening, given that they were around the same age. Then again, as Alya liked to remind her, Adrien had been trained for this his whole life by one of the top chefs in the world, while Marinette had only begun cooking in university and had risen quite quickly up the ranks since then.

“So you’ve already proven a lot can happen in a few short years!” Alya had told her just a few days ago.

“...and dessert will consist of sugared beignets in a bitter chocolate dipping sauce, and miniature winter fruit tarts topped with pear and persimmon and a grapefruit glaze.”

Marinette had nearly forgotten about the fruit tarts. When she’d first seen them on the new menu for the week, she’d wondered, somewhat wildly, if Adrien secretly read her blog; after all, he’d introduced that dish into the dessert menu only two days after she’d posted about her fruit tarts. But even given Ladybug Patisserie’s immense popularity, she couldn’t imagine that Adrien Agreste, sous chef at one of the top restaurants in the country, found the time or the energy to read the weekly exploits of someone who couldn’t bake to save her life. It had to be a coincidence.

“Have a great dinner service, everyone. Just think—one more night, and then you get a nice three-day break for the Christmas holiday!”

The room cheered, and Adrien grinned, surveying the room. His eyes paused when they met Marinette’s. His head tilted to the side, and his lips quirked up ever so slightly at the corners, as if he were sharing a private joke with her that no one else in the room would understand. For a brief few seconds, Marinette felt the air leave her lungs, and then she blinked and forced herself to turn her attention back to her linguine.

It had to be a coincidence, she thought again to herself. Still, she was suddenly grateful she’d kept herself anonymous on the blog all these months.

---

“The last customer of the night just left,” Adrien announced to the kitchen. “I couldn’t be happier with how smoothly things went tonight. Thanks to everyone here, we just had our most successful Christmas Eve dinner service in years.”

The kitchen staff cheered and applauded. Kim, the rotisseur, let out a loud whoop from the back. Adrien grinned. “Let’s finish cleaning up and get out of here so we can enjoy our breaks, shall we?”

Spirits high, the staff worked at double its normal speed to finish breaking down and cleaning the kitchen, and before Adrien knew it, workers were walking out the door in twos and threes, calling out cheerful wishes for happy holidays to each other.

Adrien waved goodbye to Nino, and then he glanced over the empty, immaculate kitchen with satisfaction, marveling at how efficient everyone had been today. It was just his luck that things would go this well when his father was traveling to a conference and not even here to see it, but he wouldn’t complain. Four days without Gabriel breathing down his neck, even if it meant spending the holidays without his only family, was a welcome respite from the tremendous pressure weighing him down lately.

He couldn’t wait to just sleep for the next couple of mornings, to stop at a coffee shop and really sit down to enjoy a café au lait, to visit the market with the intent to truly create and not to just to sell, maybe even to try to whip up something new in the comfort of his own kitchen without the specter of his father criticizing him, to—

To do all of this alone.

Adrien untied his apron and sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as he shuffled into the locker room and sat on the bench lining the wall. Grateful as he was for the break from his father, he deflated a bit realizing how lonely the next few days would be. Besides Chloé, who was in New York City for the holiday with her parents, the rest of the La Confiture staff were really the only other people with whom he interacted on a regular basis. Of course, he’d be the last person they wanted to see on their precious few days away from the restaurant. Even Nino probably needed a break from him, close as they were.

The slamming of a locker door startled him out of his thoughts, and he looked up to see Marinette Dupain-Cheng at the far end of the room, shrugging on a dark red pea coat and wrapping a black scarf around her neck.

“Chef Dupain-Cheng,” Adrien said, surprised. He stood up. “I didn’t realize you were still here.”

“Oh!” Marinette jumped and turned around, holding a hand to her chest. Her hat was askew over her hair. She walked over to him. “I didn’t even see you when I walked in here!”

Adrien laughed. “Sorry if I startled you.”

Marinette shook her head. “That’s okay, I should have been paying more attention.” She slipped her hat off of her head and held it in both hands before turning her eyes up at him. She paused, as if pondering her next sentence carefully, but when she spoke again, her question was quite simple. “What about you?”

“Me? What about me?”

Marinette looked around the dim locker room as if the meaning of her question were obvious. “Were you… Were you planning on sticking around longer?”

“Oh—no, I was going to lock up and head out in just a few minutes. Just…” He looked back at the bench. “I just needed a minute to take a breather after today.”

Marinette smiled. “That’s understandable.” She paused again, and then she let out a soft laugh. “There are rumors you sleep in here sometimes. I wondered for a second if I was catching you at bedtime.”

Adrien stared at her, momentarily stunned—it was the first time in the two months Marinette had worked at La Confiture that he’d heard anything unrelated to work, let alone a joke, come out of her mouth when she spoke to him. He burst into delighted laughter. “Is there really? I guess on occasion, it’s not too far from the truth. But I was planning on actually going home tonight, rest assured.”

Marinette’s smile seemed to touch her eyes more now, somehow, and Adrien felt his heart leap to life at the hint of a new friendship. Marinette had seemed so quiet and focused since she’d arrived at La Confiture; he’d accepted within a week of her starting in his kitchen, after a few unsuccessful attempts at casual conversation, that she had bigger things to think about than being friends with him. This was a lovely turn of events.

“Ah—by the way, Chef,” Adrien said, “your work was excellent today. I can’t tell you how many compliments your chutney received, even when the customers didn’t request to see you to tell you personally. You really are a wonderful addition to our kitchen.”

Marinette flushed. “Oh, I—well, thank you,” she murmured, tugging her hat—a black beanie with cat ears and green eyes knitted onto it—back on her head.  Adrien bit back a smile when he saw how much the hat reminded him of Plagg. “And thank you for not blowing up when I was late today.”

Adrien shook his head. “No need to thank me. My father and I…” he paused. “We have very different ways of running the kitchen.”

“I think your way works a little better for me,” Marinette muttered, and then her eyes went wide when she realized what she’d said. “I mean—no offense to Chef Agreste, of course—”

Adrien laughed again. “Your secret is safe with me.”

Marinette let out a sigh. “Thanks.” She looked up at him. “Are you—are you walking out now? Would you like me to wait for you to lock up?”

Adrien’s eyebrows rose. “Really? Yes, I’d love that,” he said, and then he blushed when he realized how desperate that sounded. “I—one second, let me just grab my stuff from my locker.”

He rushed off to grab his bag, elation and embarrassment warring with each other in his heart. When he returned and saw Marinette standing in the same spot where he’d left her, looking completely oblivious to his verbal blunder (and ridiculously adorable in that hat), elation won.

---

That concludes part one of this story! My plan is for it to be relatively short and sweet—no more than five parts, with each part being around ten pages or so. I hope you guys enjoyed! I love cooking, I love cooking shows, and I worked in a restaurant (although not nearly as nice as the one I’m portraying here) for quite some time, so I have really enjoyed working on this fic. That being said, I took a few liberties that probably need a little bit of explaining.

First, I’m not really sure that one needs to be an excellent baker to become a sous chef at a top restaurant. Here, Gabriel Agreste likes his sous chefs extremely well-rounded, and Marinette can hardly make a loaf of bread without ruining it. The mistakes she made are extremely amateur, so please suspend your disbelief—I unfortunately am not experienced enough in baking to know what kinds of mistakes are more common for people who know their way around the kitchen! 

Second, just by way of explanation: Gabriel is the chef de cuisine, or the head chef, of the restaurant. Adrien is the sous chef. Since Adrien is so experienced and good at what he does, Gabriel is in and out and takes on more of a managerial position, but he still commands the kitchen multiple days a week. Marinette has been hired as a saucier, or someone who prepares all the sauces and gravies and sautés the food. 

I tried to do a good bit of research about the environment in a top-tier restaurant like this, but of course, I’m likely to get things wrong with the zero experience I have actually having worked in one. If you catch anything that seems blatantly off (minus Marinette’s baking issues), please let me know!

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next: ii

[oohfluffy]

LMN Ch.2 | OSH

Group: EXO

Member: Oh Sehun

Theme: Angst | Fluff | Writer!AU | Neighbor!AU

Word Count: 2,488

✎ Chapter 2: New Neighbors ✎

"So the guy's a womanizer and can possibly has STD because of fucking around his school. While the girl is an innocent and smart student that gets targeted by the guy." Dasom lazily spoke after she listened to your characters' descriptions. "Really cliché, woman."

"No, it's not. All I've got to do is find a hole where they can have a conflict." You tapped your pen on the desk as you think. "How can the girl die?"

"Here we go! Why do you always kill the innocent female character? She hasn't done anything and yet—"

"The good deserves to be sent in heaven while the bad needs to remain on the land to repent for their sins. That's how it works, Dasom." You chuckled as you happily typed on your laptop. Fresh ideas flowing in your brain as usual.

"You can make the girl a playgirl instead of the boy, you know! That'll change the story!"

"It's the same. Anyway, I find it amusing to see the guy suffer always."

"You're a sadist!"

"Who's a sadist?" A familiar voice said, the door opening with the person's appearance.

"You're home." You greeted, not bothering to look at your younger sister.

"I've brought ice-cream. Do you two want some?"

"No." You quickly answered as you continued typing. Dasom looked at Chanhee and shrugged.

"Where's Bora and Soyu? They didn't come with you?" Dasom asked Chanhee with her eyebrows knitted together.

"Oh, they're actually stalking this hot college guy, unnie. I think he's the one who's gonna move next door. They invited me to go with them but I said I couldn't come because I have my part-time job later."

Your ears perked up as you heard your younger sister speak about the guy who'll move next door.

"Seriously, do you really enjoy following guys around?" Dasom asked as she massaged her temples as if she's getting stressed out just from thinking about her younger sisters.

"It's fun, unnie. We're just like their fans, okay? We're not some obsessed girls—"

"What do you call stalking them?"

"W-Well, that's different. We're not causing harm though."

"But—"

"Who's this guy you're talking about, Chanhee?"

The two stopped talking when you spoke, shocking them with your sudden interest in the topic.

"U-Uhm." Chanhee looked at your back, hesitant to tell more.

"I'm just asking his name. It's not as if I'll snatch him away from you." You scoffed, turning your swivel chair to face them both.

"His name is Oh Sehun."

Your eyes slightly widened. You don't know why but they really did.

There's something about his name.

"It screams danger." You mumbled to yourself as you slowly turned back to your laptop in wonder.

"Just go downstairs if you're hungry or something."

Before Chanhee can close the door, you turned to her again, startling the both of them.

"Where's mom?" You asked, hoping she's not out—

"She went out to the market today."

"Didn't she buy our weekly groceries just a few days ago?"

"No. It's..." Chanhee looks so hesitant to tell you but you were staring at her so hard that she swore she could melt. "It's not for the groceries."

"Then for what?" You were getting annoyed already. Your face turned blank when you realized something. "Don't tell me she went to work there?"

Your younger sister looked away as she slightly gulped under your gaze. You breathed out a sigh of disbelief.

"Calm down, Yeoreum-ah. Your mother is just worried and maybe she felt useless when she's just at home while everybody's working—"

"She's already helping by cooking our meals and doing everything in the house. Why would she feel useless?!"

"Just understand your parents, okay? They want the best for yo—"

"Yeah right. That's why they're locking me here in this room."

Dasom couldn't say anything as you turned to your laptop again, furiously typing as you did. She just stood up, walking towards the door, where your younger sister was.

"I'll let you think about it, okay? Don’t push yourself too hard. It'll be bad—"

"I know. Just go."

She sighed as Chanhee closed the door with a pained face.

You're left in this quiet and lonely room again.

Everything has changed.

"Keep breathing and push all the stress away." You took a deep breath as you stopped typing.

"I shouldn't waste any more time."

✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗  ✘

"Winter break's coming!"

You cringed as you heard Chanyeol squeal at your door.

"So how did you do at your exams?"

"Results not yet out but I'm sure I've done everything I can, noona!" Chanyeol proudly said as he walked inside your room.

"Tss. Sure."

"Anyway, my best friend's gonna move in today. He said he'll text me when they're near already. Ah, I feel so excited!"

"You sure you're not gay, Yeol?"

"YAH! That's rude, noona! I'm a man! How can you doubt your brother—"

You giggled as he childishly stomped his feet.

"Where's Chanhee?"

"I don't know about that girl. She's 16 and a stalker like her friends. I always see them outside the university grounds! Can you please scold her for it? It's not like Sehun's bothered with it, actually it's me who's bothered by it. It creeps me out when I see my own sister--"

"Let her do what she wants. She knows what she's doing." You smiled as you typed on your laptop. Chanyeol slightly peeked on your screen.

"Woah. 7k words for a single chapter?! Are you crazy? Are you planning to give me bigger eye bags, noona?!"

"I'm not gonna publish this online, idiot. This is different. I need to submit this before March next year. I have accepted the writing company that gave me the opportunity to publish under them." You sighed as you leaned back on your chair. "They were actually begging me to sign the contract with them for 5 years but..."

Chanyeol sat on the floor beside you, slowly turning your swivel chair and laying his head on your lap like a puppy. His eyes were closed as he hugged your waist gently.

You were used to this touchy younger brother of yours. You even wondered if he has an older sister complex. You chuckled at the thought as you combed his hair with your fingers, earning a whine from him.

Between the two of your younger siblings, it was Chanyeol who shows more of his affection for you. Chanhee was a cheerful dongsaeng but it's like there's a thin barrier between the two of you. Maybe it's because you're the eldest and you two have a huge age gap.

"You can't." Chanyeol mumbled as he nuzzled his head on your lap. You just hummed as you looked up the ceiling. "Then finish that book with a happy ending, noona."

"What's the connection?"

"You'll know when you finish it." Chanyeol grinned as he turned his head to you. You flicked his forehead before pushing him away from you. "Aww."

"Go and study!"

"I'm always studying!"

"That's good! Go and study more then."

"Noona!"

✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗ ❥ ✗  ✘

A knock interrupted your typing, making you stop for awhile.

"What?" You answered, waiting for a response as you saved the next chapter you've done.

"Darling, can you come out for a bit?"

When you heard your mom's voice, you instantly got up and went to open the door. She was holding a box with a cute ribbon around it.

"Rice cakes?" You asked as she slowly moved it towards you. "For me?"

"No. The neighbors have arrived earlier. I've just made them when I got home, so it's good that they're warm. Can you give it to them?"

"You're letting me go out?" You gapped at her as she smiled and nodded. "W-What about Yeol? He has a friend there."

"That boy's over there already. He said that he's gonna go to his best friend next door, looking so excited like a child." Your mother laughed as she remembered the face Chanyeol made. "Chanhee's out for her part-time job. So, that leaves you to do the job."

"Okay. I will."

You breathed in the air happily as you got out of the house.

"I feel like a prison who just got out." You chuckled as you opened the gate and walked to the house next door. You rang the doorbell as you gripped on the ribbon that holds the box. You waited patiently until a black-haired boy got out of the door.

It must be Yeol's friend.

"Hi. I'm Chanyeol's noona. I'm just here to give this to you. Welcome to the neighbor..." Your words slowed down as he opened the gate. "...hood."

Oh shit. Chanyeol didn't tell me his best friend is this good-looking!

His soft-looking black hair was messy, stuck out to every side. His eyes looking so mysterious that'll probably drown you into them. His nose so pointed that you think that it's a perfect 45 degrees or something. His lips, naturally pink and thin but probably soft. His skin as white as snow. His collarbones were slightly showing with his plain white shirt, his biceps saying hi to you.

"Oh, Chanyeol's been talking about you non-stop everyday. It's nice to finally meet you, noona. I'm Sehun." His deep voice slightly startled you.

"I hope only the good things about me were said. Nice to meet you too." You chuckled as you gave him the box.

He seems harmless though.

"Here. My mom made it just a bit earlier, it's hot so be care—"

"You're hot too though." Sehun's eyes moved downwards as he bit his lower lip. "Should I be careful?"

I take that back.

"Thank you for the compliment but I don't hit on little boys. You should be careful, I might hit you." You snapped as you felt your blood boil.

He's really a playboy as Yeol said. Why did I even think of making this guy the model for my story?

"Ooh. You're the sadist and dominant type, I like it." Sehun replied as he smirked at you. "Kidding."

"That's all." You turned your back on him, feeling your time wasted. You heard him whistle at your back. "I'll add that he's a bastard and a manwhore. Yeah." You mumbled to yourself as you closed the gate and walked inside the house.

"How's it? Have you met them?"

You turned to your mother, who's currently cooking dinner. An idea popped in your mind and made you ran to her.

"Hey, stop running."

You smiled as you got to her, peeking at the pot on the stove.

"This is a lot, mom. Are we having guests?" You sniffed and sighed as the pleasant scent of the boiling soup entered your nostrils.

"Yes. The Oh's are coming over later for dinner."

"Oh? The ones next door?"

"Yep. You met them?"

"No. Just their youngest kid." You tilted your head in wonder as you stirred the soup slowly with a spoon.

"Youngest? I thought they only have one child?"

You stopped moving and looked at her.

"Really?"

"Yeah, Chanyeol's best friend is an only child. That's why he sticks around to that boy so much. Your brother's a sweet young boy." Your mouth smiled as she thought of Chanyeol.

"Yeah, he is." You mumbled as you were in deep thought.

Should I make my male character an only child too?

You nodded to yourself as you agreed.

"Eomma, I'm home—"

"They're here!"

Chanhee scoffed as her older brother shouted behind her. She smiled as she saw you and greeted you.

"How's your part-time job, Chanhee?" You asked as you finished preparing the table. Your mother rushed towards the door with Chanyeol to greet the new neighbors.

"It was fun as usual. I got free ice-creams today too!" She cheered as she put the plastic in the freezer.

"You must be doing a good job then." You ruffled her hair as you smiled at her.

"Noona."

You turned as you heard Chanyeol call you. Your mother was talking to the elegant-looking couple happily while Chanyeol was with the flirty boy on the couch.

"Come here." Your younger brother called as he waved at you. Chanhee almost squealed as she saw Sehun, you rolled your eyes.

"Why would I?" You mouthed back at him.

"Noona." Chanyeol called out again.

"This is my oldest daughter, Yeoreum. She's a writer. Can you believe that she already made her books into the best-selling ones?!" Your mother proudly said as she let the couple sit down.

"Really? That's great!" Mrs. Oh exclaimed excitedly as she sat down. "Good for you, you have a very helpful oldest kid."

"How about you? Why did you move in this quiet neighborhood?" Your mother chatted with the couple as you served the food.

"Chanyeol." You called. He pouted at you as he stood up with his best friend. "Help me with these."

"I can help too, noona—"

"You're a guest, Sehun. Please sit down with your parents."

You turned to your brother and gestured the drinks on the counter. He obeyed you and gave the guests their drinks.

"Chanhee, are you just gonna stand there?" You asked your starstruck sister beside you. "Sit there and talk with Sehun or something. I know you want to."

She slowly nodded and walked towards the table, sitting beside the young boy. Chanyeol followed after serving the drinks and sat on the other side of Sehun. They talked as if they never saw each other while your younger sister joined in their conversation.

"So, Yeoreum does freelance work?" You heard Mr. Oh ask your mom.

"Yes, if that's what you call that." Your mother smiled as she glanced at you. "She's a hard worker though."

"It would've been great if she worked outside of the house. She wouldn't know how it is to work with others than herself."

With Mr. Oh's comment, your eyes looked down, not knowing what to say.

It hit you like a bitch.

"That's right, Mr. Oh. But..." You suddenly spoke, gaining a bit of strength after a few seconds. "...that doesn't make my work less efficient. I think it's better to work alone, I carry less burdens. I can think without caring for others opinions. I'm totally fine with that."

You walked in front of the table as you walked past by them. You slightly bowed.

"Please excuse me."

As you walked upstairs without another glance, you left them all in astonishment.

"I'm sorry for my daughter's—"

"No, it's fine. My husband must have offended her with his words. I'm sorry." Mrs. Oh apologized in behalf of her husband, who just fell silent as he drank his water.

Sehun, who Chanyeol was talking to at the moment, stared at the space where you were earlier.

"Tell me something about your noona."

—

❥ Ch.3