#rest in peace spock and zorro

[doxiedreg]

A tribute to my dogs

This piece depicts our first dog Spock guiding Zorro (who passed away yesterday) to the afterlife

Me and my family like to think Spock helped us find Zorro in the first place when he saw how sad we were without him. Spock had been there for me since I was born and I was absolutely inconsolable when he passed. He was the first death I had to cope with and I was like 13 when he passed (spock was 16.5 when he died). His death was traumatic as he had a really bad seizure (he had epilepsy and had dementia as well as a bad back) before my dad and sister rushed him to the vet while me and my mom stayed home. The vet decided to put him down then and there, it should have happened years ago but I was so attached to him, as was my dad, and we didnt want to let go. So my dad and sister returned home without a dog..I had been unable to say goodbye to him. I have felt bad for a long time once i realized how long he had been suffering and i hadnt let go. But in the end I forgave myself because I was a vulnerable lonely kid back then and I didnt want to lose my biggest support

In 2012 (I think?) we adopted zorro from his old owner we found through a dutch online marketplace (We often joked he was a second hand dog). She loved him a lot but she didnt have time for him anymore due to her job and she wanted him to go to a loving home. His old name was Gijs but one of my highschool bullies was called Gijs and we also didnt think the name suited him. So after some brainstorming we decided on the name Zorro (because he was fast and his black fur made me think of the masked hero). He was nervous and sad the first few days and didnt want to be touched but slowly but surely he warmed up to us and he soon felt right at home. He had sooooo much energy. He was super playful, was obsessed with tennis balls and he wanted to be friends with everyone, including cats though they didnt like him. He loved laying on your lap, laying on the couch or accompanying you upstairs. His presence and support has helped me through my horrible time at high school, my burn out and depression, my anxiety. He helped me go outside. He made me smile and laugh with his curious and funny behaviour. He followed me between my parent’s houses when they divorced, and when I went to live in a clinic for people with autism to stabilize for 7 months, he was always overjoyed when I came to visit home every two weeks. A few years ago though, health problems started to arise. First it was a sudden onset of back pain which was really scary. He was treated and after a long recovery he seemed to be okay. Then he started to get restless at night, crying and whining and wandering around. During the day he was fine and he was still able to be happy and cuddly. Slowly his health got worse. We found out he had kidney stones and a vet advised us to get it removed. We agreed with the surgery, though we were nervous due to his age. The vet cut him open, took an xray to see where he had to cut and then didnt see the kidney stone so he closed him up without removing anything. So my poor elderly dog went through surgery without being helped by it. My dad is still really mad about it and i am too but not much you can do about it. The vet said it wasnt his fault. We left that vet. We had moved to that vet because a. This vet was super close to our house and b. My dad was unhappy with our previous vet because they couldnt find out what was wrong with zorro or how to help him. In the end we ended up with the vet that helped him during the backpain emergency and taken great care of him. But his health just kept getting worse, he started to lose his mind, he started to be unable to be left alone or he would howl. He then didn’t want to be picked up anymore and the last few months he got more and more aggressive and he just wasnt there anymore. He would wander around the house, lost and confused. His tail was always between his legs. His back was bent. He walked strained. My dad denied it for a long time because he loved zorro so much he didnt want to let go..but me, my mom and my sisters didnt want Zorro to suffer like Spock had. We were finally able to convince him to make an appointment for the vet to come to our house to put him down. He made the appointment monday. We gave Zorro lots of snacks. My mom came to visit Tuesday to spend time with him and us..and she came again on Wednesday to be there with us. When the vet came, zorro was in his basket. So my dad got him out of there and held him in his arms on the couch. As usual Zorro growled and barked and snarled. The vet put the first injection in his bum and though he first still growled a bit he quickly went under. He was even snoring and his tongue was hanging out of his mouth. Then my mom took him on her lap so she could hold him for the final injection. I still sort of expected him to wake up snarling when my dad handed him over but he continued to sleep and was all floppy. Once in my moms arms and after the second injection, he took a few quick breaths and then he was gone..I cant continue typing because I will hit the text limit but im just happy I was able to properly say goodbye this time..