#she called him a toerag bro.
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fernhelm ¡ 1 year ago
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WHO IS LILY EVANS?
HP, HBP / Simone Weil: An Intellectual Biography - Gabriella Fiori / HP, OP / The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath / Cain - Lord Byron / HP, SS / Violence and the Sacred - RenĂŠ Girard / "How Do you Solve a Problem Like Maria?" - The Sound of Music
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starsandmaple ¡ 8 years ago
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Dances and Drafts, Final Chapter - The Most Beautiful Thing
Synopsis:
It is 1977 and the Triwizard Tournament has come to Hogwarts. As the school prepares for its first Yule Ball in two-hundred years, Lily Evans finds herself completely put off going thanks to a certain toerag, and Severus Snape too shy to even consider attending. Can a cunning plan change that?
Notes:
I do not own these characters or anything deriving from the Harry Potter universe. All of that comes from the lovely J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. Insert obligatory joke about being broke.
The Most Beautiful Thing
“Severus!” Lily’s voice echoed through the empty halls of the castle. He had run off so quickly, Lily hadn’t made it out of the hall in time to see where he’d gone.
“Severus!” she continued to shout as she ran through the corridors with no clear destination.
“Lost him already have you?” a warm voice called out towards Lily from one of the dark passageways.
“Professor Slughorn!” Lily was breathless but grateful to have run into him, “Professor, James Potter and his friends… They played a trick on Sev and he… He ran off and I don’t know where he’s… gone,” Lily was still catching her breath as she tried to quickly explain the situation. Slughorn nodded and looked up pensively.
“Well it seems to me that if I were a certain young man and wanted away from everyone else that I would go to the same place I always went to be alone in times like these,” Slughorn was being purposefully cryptic, though Lily got the hint.
“I think you might be right Professor,” she smiled at him, his eyes twinkled.
“Well off you go then, I would love to stay and chat but I have a ball to attend and I’m worried Dumbledore has already eaten all of the stuffing.”
“Yes Professor, thank you,” Lily sprinted past him.
As she rounded the corner which would take her to the potions room, she was relieved to see a dull light shining from within.
“Sev!” she called out as she passed through the threshold.
He sat on the other side of the room, with his back to her and his robes and cravat strewn across the floor.
“Sev, I’m sorry,” Lily approached him slowly, reaching out a hand to place on his shoulder.
“L-leave me alone Lily,”
“Potter was just jealous, he made all of that up to try and get to me but I know he’s an absolute prat who probably just had one of his minions make the mask for him so he could try and scare me away from you but-“ she stopped. She heard a small sniffing coming from the young man in front of her,“Severus, are you-“
“Just leave me alone Lily,” Severus turned away from her, wiping his eyes on the back of his sleeve cuff.
Lily was a little bit startled by his reaction. She had expected anger from him, but not this.
“Talk to me,” she sat down beside him, regarding him with a look of concern. Seeing him like this broke her heart and all she wanted to do was take this feeling, whatever it was, away from him.
“It belonged Lucius,” Severus said after a long moment between stifled sobs. His tears had subsided and what was left was the pure anger which had caused them, “they did get it from my dorm but it was Lucius’s mask,” he spat.
Lily had never seen Severus like this before; he was upset, he was furious, he was vulnerable. She carefully placed an arm around his shoulder.
“Lucius gave it to me when he left, he hoped it would inspire me. I wanted to get rid of it but how could I in a school where everyone is watching everything you do. And besides,” he grimaced, “Death Eaters don’t carve their names into their masks, they have the bloody dark mark,” Severus rolled up his sleeve with force and held out his bare forearm, “I am not one of them Lily, I never have been and I never will be,” he finally looked at her, eyes pleading.
“I know,” she said and smiled at him, “You would never be able to keep something like that secret from me anyway!” she laughed a little and he looked away, his expression softened.
“It’s okay,” Lily said to him. Before she realized what she was doing, she had place her hand over the bare arm which he had extended towards her. Severus jumped a little at the sudden contact of her skin on his own and he stole a sideways glance towards her. She looked brokenhearted. Her own eyes were as red as his own, the feeling of anger which had begun to subside within himself echoed in her. He place his hand on top of hers and she looked up at him, slightly surprised by his gesture.
In the silence of the abandoned potions room, Severus and Lily could hear the sound of music coming from the Yule Ball which they had just abandoned. Severus stood up, still holding Lily’s hand, which had become warm under his own.
“Lily Evans,” Lily regarded him quizzically at his sudden formality.
“Y-yes, Severus?”
“Would you do me the honour o-of,” he cleared his throat with a small cough, “Of dancing with me again?”
Lily couldn’t help herself, she let out a genuine smile, which broke through all of the tension she was feeling, and laughed.
“Of course Sev,” she stood up and he led her into one of the empty rows between the benches. He was trying to act elegantly, but in true Severus Snape fashion he couldn’t help but let a little bit of that awkwardness show through in his motions as he stood before Lily, placing both of his arms around her waist, holding her close to him. He hoped she wouldn’t notice how nervous he really was, especially after how their last dance had nearly ended.
Lily placed her arms around his shoulders, it wasn’t a formal waltz this time. They began to sway in time to the distant music. Severus held Lily to him, daring to embrace her far more intimately than he ever had, than he’d ever dreamed he would. Lily rested her head onto his shoulder, she felt warm, comfortable and safe here. She did the best she could to ignore the hammering of her heart, the blurring of her vision as she closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, taking in everything that was her best friend.
He was her best friend.
But something within Lily told her, and she knew deep down, that he wasn’t just her best friend anymore.
Giving in to the complex emotions which had been brewing both in and out of that potions room for a while now, she turned her head and her cheek made contact with his own.
At the sudden contact, Severus drew his head back to look at her and their eyes met. He brought his hand up to her face to brush a stray lock of hair behind her ear. Lily closed her eyes again and leaned into his hand, pressing her cheek into his palm. Severus’s breathing had become quick and he pressed his forehead to hers, closing his eyes. He noticed how her own breathing was equally hastened. The tips of their noses touched, sending a shiver through Lily. Severus couldn’t hold himself back any longer, his mind was racing almost at the speed of his heart. With a fluid movement of his hand from Lily’s cheek to the back of her head, Severus pulled her in.
Their lips met in a soft, innocent kiss.
It lasted only a moment, but a moment was all either of them needed for confirmation of what was happening between them. Lily barely had a chance to look at Severus before they kissed again. And again. And again.
Until all of a sudden the kisses were lasting longer, each one filled with something more passionate than the last.
Lily’s fingers tangled themselves into Severus’s hair, not caring if she messed up the dark locks which for once had been so neat. She held him, taking in everything familiar that she knew about him and experiencing it completely differently than ever before.
Severus’s hand, caressing my neck.
Severus’s body, pressed against me.
Severus’s lips, kissing my own.
Severus brought both of his hands down towards her waist, pulling her in towards him as if he couldn’t bring her in close enough. He was surely dreaming. Kissing Lily Evans was something that could only every happen in his dreams, yet right now she felt so real, so warm, so Lily. He resisted the urge to pinch himself as that would have meant releasing her, and to do that for even a second would have been such a waste. Before he knew it, he found himself pressing Lily against the work bench, the same one they had sat at together just a few days ago. Without really thinking, Severus lifted her up onto the bench, bringing her closer to his own height. Lily gasped as she felt herself become weightless and broke their kiss for only a moment before quickly bringing her hands up to cup his cheeks and kissing him again.
Time mercilessly stopped for them while they were together in that potions room. They were there for what felt like an eternity but also no time at all. Finally they stopped to look at each other, sparkling green eyes meeting deep black ones as they caught their breaths.
Lily smiled and to Severus she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
Thanks so much for reading! Please leave feedback and let me know if you’d like to see a sequel :D Also please send prompts if there’s a story you’d like to read, especially if it’s in the Harry Potter universe (though I do take other prompts too).
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starsandmaple ¡ 8 years ago
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Dances and Drafts, Chapter 3 - Come With Me
Synopsis:
It is 1977 and the Triwizard Tournament has come to Hogwarts. As the school prepares for its first Yule Ball in two-hundred years, Lily Evans finds herself completely put off going thanks to a certain toerag, and Severus Snape too shy to even consider attending. Can a cunning plan change that?
Notes:
I do not own these characters or anything deriving from the Harry Potter universe. All of that comes from the lovely J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. Insert obligatory joke about being broke.
Come With Me
The following day, Lily had decided to start trying to brew some of the potions from Slughorn’s book. She had spent the last day researching the recipes and some of the ingredients, and bar a few which required special herbs to be tended for a full moon cycle, she had made a note of a few that could be made using ingredients from Slughorn’s cabinet, which he had told her she could have full reign over for the winter break.
She was awake much earlier than a lot of the students were on their holiday, making it out of the Gryffindor common room at 10am, leaving most of her fellow cohort snoring in their beds. She wandered through the castle without running into anyone at all. Students and faculty alike were obviously making use of their holidays and Lily was glad for the peaceful walk. When she turned the corner just before the potions room, a faint smell hit her nose. Upon further approach towards the classroom, she noticed that the door was ajar.
Someone is already in there.
Lily furrowed her eyebrows. Slughorn had told her that the classroom was for her own use over the break, so no one else should be in there. She gently pushed the door and stepped inside the classroom.
She stopped in the threshold and took a sharp intake of breath.
Severus was there, concentrating very hard on the potion her was brewing; the steam from the cauldron had dampened his long black hair, which he would push back every few seconds as it fell around his face and in front of his eyes. His robes and blazer were hung gracefully over the back of the chair to his right, leaving Severus in his white collared shirt - the sleeves of which he had rolled up to the top of his arms - and a slightly loosened green and silver tie.
Ingredients were scattered across the table and a single book lay open in front of him. By the looks of things he had been there for hours.
Lily shook herself slightly, not realizing that she had been staring for a while. She was glad to note that Severus hadn’t appeared to have spotted her either because of how focused he was on the potion he was brewing.
He didn’t even notice me come in, Lily smiled to herself.
“Good morning Sev,” Lily smiled and walked further into the room.
Severus jumped slightly at the sound of her voice, his eyes widened in surprise.
“Lily! What are you doing here? I-I mean good morning, but…” he trailed off and started to relax a little after the initial shock of her sudden greeting. Lily walked towards him and stepped behind the bench he was working at.
“Slughorn gave me a project to work on over the break, I was researching some of the potions yesterday and figured I’d have a go at some of the recipes this morning,” she brought the book out of her bag and held it in her arm.
Severus paused for a second and narrowed his eyes.
“Mind if I take a look?” he eyed the book and extended an arm. Lily complied, gracefully handing the book over to him.
Severus flipped the old book over, it didn’t take him more than a second to let out a barely audible groan as he closed his eyes tightly and handed the book back to Lily, who cocked her head to the side quizzically. Severus sighed.
That sneaky little-
“Everything okay Sev?” Lily looked a little concerned.
“Y-yes,” he said, picking up his own potions book and handing it to Lily for her to examine.
“Oh!” she said, slightly surprised, “It’s the same…” Lily was now holding two identical copies of Gregory the Smarmy’s potions book which she held up side by side for comparison.
“Slughorn must have found two copies of the same extremely rare book,” Severus said flatly.
Though, more likely he made a very convincing copy himself, Severus thought to himself and he began to turn a little bit red.
Lily smiled.
“Well in any case, this is great!” she said cheerfully, Severus looked at her slightly taken a back, “We can work through the book together now,” she smiled widely at him and he couldn’t help return it.
Lily took the space next to him and removed the blue cardigan she was wearing, placed it on top of Severus’s uniform and rolled up the sleeves of her white t-shirt. As Lily regarded Severus’s discarded uniform she frowned slightly, and thought to herself.
Of course he would rather wear this than his own clothes, even on holiday.
Shaking the thought and what it implied out of her head she sat down on the high chair and looked at what Severus was working on.
“I already worked through the first two potions from the book, the third is impossible to complete at present because we need stewed lacewing flies so I have moved on to the fourth,” he paused for a second “though I am having some trouble making out what this says,” Severus pointed to a line in his book which had faded, “here it looks like it says 2 cups but it could just as easily be ½ a cup and that is too big a difference to just guess.”
Lily opened her own book to the fourth recipe and dragged her finger along to page to the line Severus was reading from.
“Definitely half a cup, my copy is much clearer, see?” she leant over to Severus, indicating to the line in question.
She suddenly felt Severus breathe in sharply and she noticed how close they were; leaning over to him and brought their shoulders together, and the way that Lily’s head was positioned brought her face close to his own. Her heart jumped a little at the sound of his gasp and she felt hot, though she figured the sudden rise in temperature was simply due to the heat from the bubbling cauldron next to her.
“Ummm, yes so half a cup of basilisk venom poured in quickly and stirred…”
Severus and Lily followed the recipe until its conclusion, then moving on to the next one and the one after that until they had lost track of time. Lily’s rumbling stomach finally alerted them to the fact that they had long missed lunch.
“Oh wow, it’s already 3:30!” Lily gasped as she caught sight of the time on the old clock by Slughorn’s desk at the end of the room, “we’ve missed lunch,” Lily smiled, her hair was now also slightly dampened from the steam of the cauldron, her cheeks pink from the heat.
She looks breath-taking, Severus thought.
“Are you hungry?” he asked, Lily’s stomach rumbled again in response and they both laughed a little.
“I should probably go and see if there’s anything left in the great hall from lunch,” she said, though they both knew how unlikely that was.
“Why don’t we call it a day, we’ve made a lot of great progress,” Severus admired their handy work; four bottles of completed potion now sat on the table behind their cauldron. Lily gave him a look of pride in what they had accomplished.
“All right, we better clear this up then,” Lily waved her wand and the various ingredients levitated back into their rightful places inside Slughorn’s cabinet, the cauldron’s flame went out and the smoke was cleared from the room.
Lily went to put her personal belongings back in her bag before reaching for her cardigan, which was no longer on the back of the chair where she had left it. Puzzled, she looked up.
“Have you seen my –“
To her surprise, Severus was already holding out her cardigan for her, open and waiting for her to step into it. His gaze was averted and his cheeks slightly pink, something which easily could have resulted from the hours of brewing they had just done, or something else.
Lily parted her lips slightly and then smiled at him softly.
“Oh, thanks Sev,” she placed her bag on the chair and turned her back to him, holding out her arms as he pulled the cardigan over them and onto her shoulders. It wasn’t the smoothest motion, the cardigan got stuck on the bunched up fabric of Lily’s t-shirt for a brief moment and Severus had to quickly smooth it before pulling the cardigan up the rest of the way. He stepped in close and let his hands linger on her shoulders for a second longer, his heart racing and his breath quickening as he did so.
He had missed his chance to help her yesterday, he wasn’t going to hesitate a second time.
Severus was very aware that they had less than a year left together like this before school finished for good. Internally, he was battling with this thought and the fact that he lacked the courage to ever do anything to make his feelings known. He was scared of what he could lose, the ability to be with Lily like this, as friends. He had just about convinced himself that that was all he could possibly hope for.
But he knew he would regret it for the rest of his life if he didn’t try. And if that idiot Potter had the guts to ask Lily out every single day then Severus knew he couldn’t let Potter best him.
Severus stepped back and Lily turned towards him.
They were still close, though not as close as they had been before.
“L-Lily, I’ve been thinking…” for once he found himself unable to look into those beautiful green eyes, he was shifting his weight from foot to foot anxiously.
“What’s that Sev, are you okay?” Lily looked concerned.
“Y-yes I’m fine!” Sev reassured her. He took a breath and wrapped his arms around himself.
“I was just wondering…” he paused.
“Yea?”
“I-if you might want to…” he was struggling to form words, Lily was still looking at him, a look of bewilderment on her face.
“Ummm…” Severus took another, deeper breath, sighing as he exhaled.
“Uh, go ahead without me, t-there’s something I wanted to check out,”
He couldn’t do it.
“Oh, er…” Lily paused and smiled at him “Yea sure, I’ll see you later?”
“Yea, see you tomorrow,” Severus watched Lily leave the room and waited until he was sure she was gone before he let out a large, frustrated sigh and slumped onto the chair, pressing his forehead into the table in front of him.
“Hey Lily,” he said to himself in a mocking voice.
“I was wondering if you wanted to go to the ball with me.”
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starsandmaple ¡ 8 years ago
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Dances and Drafts, Chapter 5 - Excuses
Synopsis:
It is 1977 and the Triwizard Tournament has come to Hogwarts. As the school prepares for its first Yule Ball in two-hundred years, Lily Evans finds herself completely put off going thanks to a certain toerag, and Severus Snape too shy to even consider attending. Can a cunning plan change that?
Notes:
I do not own these characters or anything deriving from the Harry Potter universe. All of that comes from the lovely J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. Insert obligatory joke about being broke.
Excuses
That night after dinner Lily found herself staring up at the ceiling of her dorm room deep in thought, a sense of melancholy hovering over her.
What the heck is going on with me?
The Yule Ball was just two days away and it was all anyone in Gryffindor could talk about. Who was going with who, who was wearing what, what the ball itself might be like…
Something that Lily had picked out from the conversations as she passed through the common room on her way up to the dormitories was that James had asked someone other than her to the ball.
“So James finally got himself a date,” Lily had overheard one of the Gryffindor girls gossiping.
“Oh! Who is it?!” asked another girl eagerly, Lily had slowed her walking so that she might hear more of the conversation, the first girl shook her head.
“All I heard was that she asked him the other day but he turned her down,” she lowered her voice slightly, as if this news – which by now would be common knowledge – was some sort of juicy gossip “It sounds like he thought it through and asked her himself today, of course she said yes. I mean as a champion he has to have a partner doesn’t he and it’s getting down to the wire so what else was he going to do?” the two girls giggled at the extremely back-handed comment.
Jealousy, Lily thought whilst simultaneously feeling a wave of relief wash over her as she climbed the stairs of the tower.
Now that she was alone in the dorm with just her thoughts to keep her company, however, she felt a little bit… Empty.
She turned in her bed onto her side.
Was it because she wouldn’t have the pleasure of dealing with James Potter for the next couple of days before the ball? No, that wasn’t it…
If she were honest with herself, she might even admit that she was feeling a little left out.
This is why I don’t want to go to the stupid ball anyway.
At that thought, her fellow Gryffindor 7th year girls burst into the room, giggling.
“Hey Lily,” one of them called out to her,
“Oh, hey Dayana,” Lily acknowledged her friend, a tall girl with long, mousy-brown hair and cat like features. Dayana came to sit next to Lily on her bed, every so often popping a Bertie Bott’s Every-Flavour Bean into her mouth. Lily shifted up to give her some more room.
“Do you have everything ready for the ball Saturday?” Lily had counted the total of 10 seconds that it took for the subject of the ball to be brought up.
“Um, I’m not actually sure I’m going,” Lily replied.
“What?! But Lily everyone is going,” Dayana was completely taken aback by Lily’s response, so much so that she threw her hands up in surprise, causing a few of her Every-Flavour Beans to spill out onto the floor with a soft rattle.
“Yea, I know bu-“
“And you’re already here, you have zero excuses not to go,”
“Yes, but I jus-“
“And it doesn’t matter that you have no one to go with, I mean plenty of people are going alone and there are always the students from the other schools who I’m sure would dance if you asked them once you were there,” Dayana wasn’t listening to anything Lily was trying to say, she was far too caught up in the excitement for the ball.
Maybe this was it, the reason that she didn’t want to go. Everyone had become so absorbed in everything to do with this Yule Ball that Lily was sick of it, it was all anyone could talk about. It had been going on since the ball had been announced at the end of November. It had even interfered partly with their lessons as special dance rehearsals had been scheduled around their NEWTs, something which Lily had openly objected to as Head Girl, though the faculty, particularly Professor McGonagall, had insisted it was necessary for the students of the hosting school to present themselves well at the ball.
This could also be why she had been enjoying her alone time with Severus so much over the past few days. Not only was he her best friend and just generally comfortable for her to be around but working on the potions together had given her mind a rest from everything Triwizard Tournament.
“Oh!” a lightbulb suddenly seemed to go off over Dayana’s head, “Why don’t you ask that Snape boy?” she asked, as if she had been working very hard on her occlumency.
“W-what?” Lily had been caught off-guard.
“Well I mean,” Dayana paused between beans, “he’s always seemed a bit” Dayana paused, choosing her next work carefully “weird, and I don’t know him very well, not to mention he’s in Slytherin but you two are really close aren’t you? Everyone’s talking about the study dates you guys have been having since the end of term, why don’t you two go together?” Dayana winked suggestively at her friend and Lily responded with an exaggerated sigh.
Though Lily very much doubted that everyone had been talking about them considering how much the Yule Ball had been dominating everyone’s conversations this past week, it came as no surprise that Potter hadn’t been able to keep his mouth shut about Peter catching her and Severus in the potions lab.
Dayana was looking at her expectantly.
“I, er, I hadn’t thought about it,” Lily replied honestly. Dayana rolled her eyes in response.
“You mean you haven’t noticed the way that boy has been looking at you since, well, always?”
“What do you mean?” Lily was beginning to see where Dayana was going with this, but wasn’t sure she was ready to acknowledge it.
“Oh wow Lily, for top of our year you sure are dense sometimes,” Dayana shook her head and smiled, “Right! I’m going to bed. See you in the morning Lily!”
“Yea, goodnight Dayana,” Lily said quietly as Dayana moved over to her own bed and drew the curtains with a wave of her wand. Lily drew her own curtains closed, but it was a while before she found sleep.
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starsandmaple ¡ 8 years ago
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Dances and Drafts, Chapter 7 - A Little Gryffindor Courage
Synopsis:
It is 1977 and the Triwizard Tournament has come to Hogwarts. As the school prepares for its first Yule Ball in two-hundred years, Lily Evans finds herself completely put off going thanks to a certain toerag, and Severus Snape too shy to even consider attending. Can a cunning plan change that?
Notes:
I do not own these characters or anything deriving from the Harry Potter universe. All of that comes from the lovely J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. Insert obligatory joke about being broke.
A Little Gryffindor Courage
It was the day before the Yule Ball.
Lily was trying to ignore this fact even more since yesterday’s events and the conversation she’d had with Dayana last night. Pieces were starting to fall into place; Lily’s aversion to the ball, the way Severus had been acting.
Which now that she took the time to consider it, he had been acting differently over the last few days.
He even stood up to James for me when he’d never been able to do that for himself, she smiled to herself slightly and her mind shifted to images of him in the potions lab.
Hair damp, face pink, sleeves rolled up to the tops of his slim arms to showing surprisingly toned biceps for his size-
Lily shook herself to cut the thoughts short.
What is going on here? She asked herself internally.
Are you actually developing feelings for-
“Severus!” she exclaimed, nearly running into his tall, slim frame. Her heart jumped and she internally slapped herself. It had done that the other day too.
“Lily, I was just…” he trailed off, looking at her with concern, “Are you okay?” he cocked his head sideways in regard.
“Y-yes! I’m fine!” she stammered, not realizing that her cheeks had flushed from all of her deep thought. A look of mixed anger and frustration crossed Severus’s face.
“Has Potter been bothering you again?” he asked quickly.
“No I just,” she sighed, “Last night I realized just how fed up I am with all of this Yule Ball stuff,” she admitted, Severus nodded in understanding and smiled slightly.
“I know exactly how you feel,”
Doubt it, Lily thought.
“Come on,” he indicated down the hallway, “I was going to check up on something but now that I’ve found you we might as well get back to brewing,” she nodded in response.
The walk to the potions room was uncomfortably silent for Lily. She found herself not knowing how to act anymore. Her mouth was dry and her increased heartrate was not helping the situation. She walked slightly behind Severus, gazing up at him curiously.
He had always been her best friend, she could hardly imagine anything else, why had it taken so long to consider the possibility that there could be more between them?
She gazed down, a look of frustration crossing her face.
Because I’ve been so distracted by other things, her mind flashed through months of NEWTs preparation and initial examinations, as well as all of her Head Girl duties and trying to keep Potter off her back, of course she had let her friendship with Severus fall on the back burner a little bit.
But he had always been there for her. From the start, he had comforted her when Petunia had called her a freak. He had guided her into the wizarding world and held her hand, figuratively of course, throughout all of it. Even now he was putting her before himself; he clearly cared about her, enough to stand up to the wizards who had bullied him his entire time at Hogwarts.
Lily suddenly remembered the other day when they were about to leave the potions room. It was like Severus wanted to ask her something but couldn’t at the last minute. That conversation had bothered her as it was so unlike Severus to get so flustered. If Severus cared for her to the extent she felt he did, then perhaps his feelings went beyond friendship as well and if so…
Could he have been trying to ask me to the ball? Lily shook the thoughts out of her head again, though she knew deep down it was entirely possible.
They reached the potions room and Severus pushed the door open, motioning for her to enter first as he held it.
Lily smiled in thanks and walked in, her heartrate had remained steadily high and she was actually starting to feel hot.
Severus quietly set up their usual table, placing a large cauldron over the burner and igniting it with flourish of his wand. He brought out various beakers and measuring equipment and Lily hurried over to Slughorn’s storage cabinet. She ran her finger down the page of ingredients for the next potion in the book, quickly grabbing each from Slughorn’s slightly disorganized shelves.
She brought them over as Severus was taking off his blazer and rolling up his sleeves.
Lily sat down in her space next to his but found she could not bring herself to look at him. She was suddenly very aware of every movement he made, every breath he took. When had he become so endearing to her?
“Lily, are you okay?” he spoke just as he always did, clearly all of this was happening inside Lily’s mind, she thought. She was unaware, however, that this was exactly what Severus went through every single time he saw the enchanting witch. He had just become very practiced at concealing it.
“Y-yes! I’m fine, I was just thinking too hard,” Severus frowned.
“Are you sure there isn't something bothering you?” he asked, obviously concerned.
“No… Well maybe, but…” she sighed and let her instincts take over.
Lily leaned her head onto Severus’s shoulder and immediately relaxed into it. This had the opposite effect on Severus, who almost instantly stiffened, not quite sure what he should do.
It took him a moment, but he exhaled a very shaky breath. He began to hesitantly bring his arm up behind her, hovering it over Lily for a moment before carefully placing it on her arm, holding her as she leaned on him. Closing his eyes for a second, he remembered to breathe.
“Is everything okay Lily?” he asked, trying to keep the nervousness out of his voice as he made an attempt to comfort her.
“I think so,” she said, turning her head so that it buried a little more into his shoulder. Severus was painfully aware of every movement she made. He was now also able to smell her hair, which was an endearing mixture of honey and hibiscus. Severus didn’t even feel his own head leaning towards hers before it was too late, his cheek connected with the top of her head and remained there, burying into her auburn hair.
He was making a very pointed effort to try and calm himself down. This kind of contact with his best friend was something he’d never dared hope he might experience. He opened his eyes to blurred vision and immediately closed them again. The room was spinning far too much and his heart was beating uncontrollably.
Lily’s own heart was pounding in her chest. She moved a hand onto his leg in an attempt to ease him; she could tell he was incredibly nervous at this sudden physical contact but she tried her best to make her movements so as to not startle him.
As if out of nowhere, she felt Severus’s own hand come into contact with hers. She turned her head a little in surprise, trying to catch a glimpse of his face and found Severus’s dark eyes looking down into her own.
“Hey Sev?” she said suddenly, causing Severus to quickly avert his gaze.
“Y-yes, L-Lily?” he stammered, clearly very nervous.
“Would you be my date to the Yule Ball?” she asked, throwing all caution to the wind. Severus was shocked.
“Shouldn’t I – I mean aren’t I supposed to be the one asking you that?” Severus rambled, causing Lily to giggle, before pouting in mock-rejection.
“Oh come on Sev, it’s 1977,” she rolled her eyes jokingly, “Is that a no then?” she grinned, Severus all of a sudden went into panic mode.
“No! I mean, no it’s not I no – I mean…” he sighed a deep breath and looked at her, “Yes, Lily, I would love to,” he finally smiled at her, a small, sweet smile. Lily couldn’t help but return it.
“It’s a date then,” Lily said quietly, suddenly feeling a shift in the air between them, heat rushing to her face. She quickly turned her attention back to the table in front of them.
“Right! We better get back to work,” she said quickly, trying to bring normality back into the atmosphere again. Severus suddenly shifted himself to face the table as well.
“O-of course!” he had no idea how he was supposed to act now. He fumbled a little with the implements as they began to measure out the ingredients for the next potion.
Lily looked at him briefly in clandestine, grinning a little to herself.
He’s really nervous, the realization made her feel a little more relaxed. At least he was as unsure as she was.
They were both in so wrapped up in their thoughts that neither of them noticed the sound of footsteps leaving the doorway to the potions room.
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starsandmaple ¡ 8 years ago
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Dances and Drafts, Chapter 4 - Standing Ground
Synopsis:
It is 1977 and the Triwizard Tournament has come to Hogwarts. As the school prepares for its first Yule Ball in two-hundred years, Lily Evans finds herself completely put off going thanks to a certain toerag, and Severus Snape too shy to even consider attending. Can a cunning plan change that?
Notes:
I do not own these characters or anything deriving from the Harry Potter universe. All of that comes from the lovely J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. Insert obligatory joke about being broke.
Standing Ground
“For the final time, I will not go to the ball with you!” Lily had just about had enough of James Potter to the point she was red in the face.
“Well are you going with someone else?” he asked her, mockingly. He of course knew the answer.
“No, I am not,”
“Then go with me,” James grinned his usual annoying grin and had Lily not been Head Girl she may have risked a detention just for the satisfaction of hexing him on the spot.
They were stood facing each other in the corridor where James had somehow manged to cut her off as she was walking towards to potions room for a second day of brewing with Severus. Lily made a move to walk around him but James side-stepped in front of her.
“Where you headed, Evans?”
“None of your business, toerag,” Lily glared and Potter’s posse all laughed at once. Finally, James’s grin faltered.
“Come on James, give up already, she’s not interested,” laughed Sirius, “Why don’t you just go with that cute girl who asked you yesterday?” James shot a nasty look at his friend who simply grinned back at him and winked. The rest of the Marauders laughed.
Lily took this opportunity to try and walk around them for a second time but James once again blocked her path.
“Peter said he saw you in the potions lab having a study date with old Snivellus,” Lily narrowed her eyes at him.
“And?” she cocked her head sideways.
“Are you going to the ball with him?” James demanded.
“I already told you, I’m not going with anyone, okay?” Lily repeated, exasperated.
“Well is something going on between the two of you?” the disgusted look that plastered his face made his good-looking face appear very unattractive.
“How is it any of your business who I choose to spend my time with and what goes on in that time?” she questioned him once again, stepping forwards towards him, “Sounds to me like you’re jealous of Severus.”
James gritted his teeth, Lily grinned.
“I’m right, aren’t I?” James took a step back.
“What’s going on here?” the Marauders all turned to face the source of the voice which echoed down the hall from behind them. Lily looked around James to see Severus, standing at the end of the hall. Though showing a little fear, Severus stood firmly in his place, with an angry determination in his eyes that Lily didn’t recognize from him.
“Ah, here he is!” exclaimed James mockingly, as he took long, slow strides towards Severus before placing his left hand on his shoulder “Speak of the devil, or should I say, Death Eater?” James spat, glaring at Severus.
“No,” said Severus, moving James’s hand from his shoulder, “That’s what Lily has been saying to you isn’t it? No? From what I’ve heard you are a little unaware of what that word means so I will phrase this another way: Please, leave Lily alone,” it took all of the courage Severus had to look James in the eye. The two glared at each other for a moment, the air in the corridor became very tense and fear suddenly crept over Lily.
��Both of you, stop it!” Lily called out, sensing wands were about to be drawn.
James, glanced at her briefly before turning back to Severus and suddenly letting out a loud laugh. He patted Severus forcefully on the shoulder, almost knocking over his slim frame before looking back at Lily with a forced smile on his face.
“Oh don’t worry Lily, Snivellus knows I’m only playing,” he looked back at Severus pointedly, “Am I right, Snivy?”
Severus paused but stood his ground. He knew better than to try and provoke James when he could end this argument now.
“Yea, right,” Severus said plainly. James let go of his shoulder and turned to walk back down the hall towards Lily.
“I’ll see you both at the ball then,” James said sarcastically as he passed Lily. The rest of the Marauders followed suit and Lily rushed down the hallway towards Severus, embracing him.
Severus was caught off guard. He was suddenly unsure of what to do with his hands and hovered them over Lily’s back for a moment. Lily hugged him tighter, Severus took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and placed one hand on her back, the other on the back of her head. Her auburn hair was soft under his fingers and he fought the urge to inhale through his nose and breathe in the smell of it.
“Why did you come?” she finally asked, face against his chest.
“Y-you didn’t turn up to the potions classroom, s-so I came looking for you,” his voice faltered slightly.
She loosened her grip, freeing him from the embrace. Severus felt a sudden cold empty space where she had been, where Lily had been.
She has hugged me before, he thought to himself, but never like that. It was like she was trying to hold on to him, like letting him go would lead to him running down the hall after James and doing something that would get him expelled. Like him leaving her behind at Hogwarts would hurt her.
Severus felt his face heat up.
I’m probably just over-thinking it, the rational part of his mind interjected.
“You shouldn’t have intervened,” she looked up at him, her eyes filled with a combination of anger and concern, “What if James had started something?”
“I would have fought back,” Severus said with a slight smile. His tone came across as half serious, half flippant.
Lily tried her best not to smile back but felt a small grin force its way onto her face.
“What if you had been hurt?! We never would have made it to the end of the book by the end of the break!” she finally smiled whole-heartily up at him and punched him playfully on the arm.
Severus mock-winced and grinned, motioning towards the corridor behind them.
“Shall we get back to it then?” he asked.
Lily nodded.
“We shall.”
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starsandmaple ¡ 8 years ago
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Dances and Drafts, Chapter 11 - Patience
Synopsis:
It is 1977 and the Triwizard Tournament has come to Hogwarts. As the school prepares for its first Yule Ball in two-hundred years, Lily Evans finds herself completely put off going thanks to a certain toerag, and Severus Snape too shy to even consider attending. Can a cunning plan change that?
Notes:
I do not own these characters or anything deriving from the Harry Potter universe. All of that comes from the lovely J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. Insert obligatory joke about being broke.
Patience
The time was 6:56, four minutes before the doors to the Great Hall were due to open marking the start of the Yule Ball. Groups of giddy students were huddle on the wall opposite the large doors in anticipation, while more well-dressed individuals descended the nearby staircase, each making their own sort of 'grand entrance' before joining the throng.
Severus was surprised at just how good everyone looked. Boys who normally didn’t make any effort in their appearance whatsoever had cleaned up well, and girls who Severus may have harshly described as ‘plain’ now shone in their own way.
He couldn’t spot one witch in particular however; Lily had yet to arrive.
For some reason this made him even more nervous, the anticipation building as he was forced to wait patiently for his frien- no, his date to arrive. He drummed his long fingers against the stone wall on which he leaned, trying to avoid looking around for her every two seconds.
6:58, the clock kept managing to catch his eye, even though he was trying desperately to ignore that too. Not ten feet away from him, he spotted a Gryffindor girl who he recognized as one of Lily’s friends, Diana? No, something like that…
She was nothing to sneeze at either; she wore a floor-length gown of red silk and crystals, her hair twisted neatly into a knot at the back of her head, loose curls falling out and framing her face very nicely. Lily obviously hadn’t arrived with her and this made Severus even more nervous.
6:59, only about 30 seconds before the doors were due to open. He knew she never would, but the thought did cross his mind that perhaps she had asked him as a joke with the intention of standing him up.
They were beginning to line up the champions and their dates for their special dance to initiate the ball. Severus couldn’t help but notice the tall, handsome James Potter, who was leading the line. Everything about him was irritatingly perfect. Not only was he just naturally good looking, but the way he wore his tailored dress robes and his hair smoothed in a way that looked effortless made students, male and female alike, glare with jealousy at his date, who was also quite attractive in her own right. She was a tall girl Severus recognized as being one of the Beauxbaton students.
Just then, the doors to the Great Hall magically creeped open, inviting a loud cheer from the students followed by even more excited chatter. Startled, Severus started looking around in panic; Lily was still nowhere to be seen. Students were filing into the hall, leaving Severus stood against the wall by himself as the chatter funneled inside with them. James spotted him and called from across the room.
“What’s the matter Snivellus, date stood you up?” he sneered before turning back to his own date, a grin of satisfaction plastered on his face.
Severus remained where he was and gazed down at the floor, exhaling in annoyance.
Lily wouldn’t do that, she’s not like them, he reminded himself.
Just then, Severus heard music being played from inside the hall, giving the champions their cue to make their entrance. They walked in, heads held high, and left Severus completely alone.
Lily wouldn’t do that… Would she?
At that, Severus shifted in place and looked down the hall in his right. Silence. Nobody was coming.
He sighed and kicked the tip of his foot softly into the ground, his slightly dulled black dress shoes making a soft tapping sound which echoed down the halls. The silence that followed was deafening, to the point where the sound of quick footsteps coming from atop the staircase brought on the biggest wave of relief he had even felt.
“Sev! I’m so sorry I’m late,”
He let his gaze fall on the most beautiful sight he thought he would ever see.
Descending the staircase in front of him was Lily, and she looked stunning. She wore a gown of deep blue, the colour perfectly complementing her auburn hair which was lightly curled and pinned back so that it was half up in an elegant knot and half cascading around her shoulders. Something about her seemed to sparkle, but Severus wasn’t positive that wasn’t just his imagination as what he saw could not have been real.
“I’m so so so sorry, I lost track of time trying to get my hair to co-operate… Sev?” she looked at him quizzically, this snapped him out of his daze.
“N-no! That’s okay, you…” he coughed to clear his throat, “You look stunning Lily,” his words came out in no more than a small whisper.
Lily smiled so brightly, something which added to a vision Severus didn’t think could get more beautiful.
“You look very handsome, Severus,” she walked to his side, suddenly Severus realized they had a ball to attend. “S-shall we?” he asked, gingerly offering his arm which Lily placed her own atop of carefully.
She nodded and they walked towards the door, pausing for a brief moment to wait for the sound of applause which marked the end of the champions’ dance before Severus opened the doors with a small wave of his wand and they walked inside.
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starsandmaple ¡ 8 years ago
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Dances and Drafts, Chapter 9 - The Roots of Rejection
Synopsis:
It is 1977 and the Triwizard Tournament has come to Hogwarts. As the school prepares for its first Yule Ball in two-hundred years, Lily Evans finds herself completely put off going thanks to a certain toerag, and Severus Snape too shy to even consider attending. Can a cunning plan change that?
Notes:
I do not own these characters or anything deriving from the Harry Potter universe. All of that comes from the lovely J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. Insert obligatory joke about being broke.
The Roots of Rejection
For all of the excitement that had lead up to it, the castle was oddly quiet when the day of the ball had finally arrived. Lily suspected that most students were choosing to sleep in this morning in preparation for what was sure to be a very late night.
Lily herself was in the library, scribbling notes on a piece of parchment with a large book open in front of her. She was studying for the exams next term, even with all the excitement she felt, which she could barely contain, she needed to keep up with her studies if she wanted to finish with the five ‘outstanding’ qualifications that she expected of herself.
The library was so quiet that when Lily heard a door open from far away it made her jump. She was a little surprised to hear someone come in but didn’t think too much of it until –
“Evans,” said James, as he walked over to her.
“Not now Potter, I’m really trying to get through this book before I have to-,”
“Get ready for the ball?” James finished for her. If Lily weren’t mistaken, his voice sounded a little hurt.
Lily narrowed her eyes at him, she had only told Dayana that she had decided to go, so how did James always seem to know everything that happened to her?
“Just tell me this Evans, why did you-“
“Aren’t you finished with this now?” Lily cut him off, looking up from her notes, a clear look of annoyance on her face, “You asked that Beauxbaton girl to the ball so you should have no reason to bother me about this anymore,” James smirked a little.
“Are you the jealous one now, Evans?”
“Clearly not,” she said with finality, placing her quill on the desk and folding her arms in front of her.
“Oh, that’s right,” James said, making a point to pretend to be in thought, “You’ve got yourself your own date to the ball, I’d almost forgotten,” clearly he had not, Lily scowled at him.
“Do you not feel a little embarrassed? Why go through all the trouble of a pity date just to make your pathetic friend feel better about himself?” James was clearly angry, though even he realized he said too much when Lily stood to confront him.
“Severus is not pathetic and it most certainly isn’t a ‘pity date’” she thrust her index finger angrily into his chest. Had she not been used to his torments, and thus a master of self-restraint in this area, it could have easily been her wand pointed at James instead.
James’s face changed all of a sudden; his arrogant bravado was peeling away to reveal an expression that was actually a little hurt.
Lily made her move to exit, leaving the book open on the table. She didn’t have the energy to put it back.
“Can I just ask you one thing Lily?” Lily turned and raised an eyebrow.
He’s never called me Lily before.
“Why him and not me?” Lily couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped her lips. Beneath it all, James was just as insecure as Severus. Where Severus concealed it with an air of indifference, James did so with false boldness and pride. They weren’t so different in that sense after all.
Still, Lily knew the answer.
“It was never a competition James, as much as I know you like to think everything is,” she carefully used his own first name in her response and watched his face carefully shift, he almost seemed disappointed in himself, “He cares about me, truly cares and...” she paused, “I care about him too,” with that, she turned, leaving a downtrodden James Potter sat on the table where she had just been working.
As Lily left the library, intending to head straight to the Gryffindor dorm room to begin getting ready for the ball, James gazed after her. Slowly, a deep feeling of anger and rejection rooted itself within him and he stood up from the table top.
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starsandmaple ¡ 8 years ago
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Dances and Drafts, Chapter 2 - Definitely Not Potter
Synopsis:
It is 1977 and the Triwizard Tournament has come to Hogwarts. As the school prepares for its first Yule Ball in two-hundred years, Lily Evans finds herself completely put off going thanks to a certain toerag, and Severus Snape too shy to even consider attending. Can a cunning plan change that?
Notes:
I do not own these characters or anything deriving from the Harry Potter universe. All of that comes from the lovely J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. Insert obligatory joke about being broke.
Definitely Not Potter
It wasn’t that she didn’t want to go to the Yule Ball. Had it simply been a straight forward, guaranteed good party she would have been as excited as everyone else.
But she wasn’t.
Now that she’d decided to stay at Hogwarts for the Christmas vacation however, it seemed ridiculous to not go. The only excuse she could think of for not going would be so that she could spend Christmas with her family. However, Petunia was at home for the break and Lily could even potentially consider it her Christmas gift to her sister not to come home. So what was the problem?
Something was nagging her, and it wasn’t just the fact that it was 4 o’clock on Tuesday afternoon, only 4 days before the ball, and she was sat in the study hall alone and she could expect to hear from a certain toerag any minute n-
“Hey Lil-“
“For the last bloody time I-“ she froze. Lily the voice had said. She turned in her seat.
“Severus!” she exclaimed, now facing a pale, dark haired, lanky wizard in Slytherin robes who had just taken the seat next to her. Definitely not Potter, she was so relieved she placed a hand on his shoulder and giggled.
“I’m so sorry, I thought you were…” she smiled apologetically and shook her head. Severus, who had gone an uncomfortable shade of ‘slightly less pale than usual’, frowned.
“He’s not still bothering you is he?” Lily shook her head, relaxed a little and removed her hand from him.
“It’s fine, I gave him a hard time yesterday, must have scared him off,” Snape’s frown softened a little. Though his scowl didn’t completely disappear, Lily wasn’t sure it ever really did. He mumbled something pensively.
“What are you still doing here?” Lily asked, “I thought you would have gone back on the Express today, though I was wondering where my goodbye was,” she nudged him with her elbow playfully. Severus smiled a little, hoping that Lily wasn’t just saying that and that the absence of a goodbye from him had occupied her mind, even if just for a second. Avoiding her question, he replied.
“I’m sorry it’s been awhile since we’ve seen each other, the first round of NEWTs really took up a lot of our time last term, huh,” Severus looked down, Lily nodded and turned back towards the table.
“How do you think you did?” she asked.
“Not as well as you,” he replied, not missing a beat. He looked up at her and grinned a little.
Lily turned and smiled.
“So what have you been busy with since classes finished?” she asked, still wondering why Severus had remained at the castle, though she suspected she knew the answer. Even though the Yule Ball didn’t interest him whatsoever…
…he would much rather be here than at home with his father, she frowned as she thought to herself. She figured asking him this way was far better than prying.
“Just a little side project, potions and things, you know… The usual,” still avoiding her question slightly, he spoke in his typical, very flat manner.
Lily turned back towards her work briefly, causing her to shift slightly in her seat. Severus suddenly became very aware of the fact that this change had caused their legs to touch underneath the table and remain in contact. He wasn’t sure whether he should move his legs away or not. He blushed a little.
“W-what are you reading?” he asked, trying to shift attention away from him and hopefully his legs brushing hers with every small postural shift. He didn’t think she had noticed his legs or his question however; she was so concentrated on what she was reading,
She hadn’t even noticed me sit down, Severus smiled to himself.
Severus Snape had been very aware of his feelings towards Lily Evans for a long time, almost as aware as he was sure she was oblivious. If anyone had asked him to put his finger on the moment he had realized he loved her, he wouldn’t have been able to tell them when the feelings started; only that it was moments like these, where she wore that look of concentration on her beautiful features, her green eyes sparkling and her auburn hair cascading around her, that added fuel to a very difficult to a flame that he didn’t think could ever be extinguished.
Lily closed her book and turned to face him.
“Shall we?” she smiled and cocked her head towards the door, picking up her bag and the book from the table. Severus stood and smiled faintly back. He imagined for a minute that he had the courage to offer a hand to help her up, but the time quickly passed before he could gather the nerve.
They walked together out of the study hall, through the corridors and towards the great hall. They were still early for dinner but Lily figured she could use some time to catch up with her oldest, and best, friend before the other students filed in.
They sat down at the Gryffindor table and talked about whatever came to mind. They had known each other for so long that things were comfortable between them. The current Triwizard Tournament gave them plenty of conversation points; from the tactics used by some of the champions to whether or not they thought some of the mentors were encouraging cheating among the contestants. Though not Severus’s ideal topic to discuss, he did enjoy seeing Lily animate as she talked about the very dramatic first task that had just recently occurred.
It couldn’t be avoided forever though, eventually the topic of the dreaded Yule Ball finally came up.
“Are you going with anyone?” Severus asked, avoiding Lily’s gaze. Lily leaned back in her seat and sighed.
“Nope,” she smiled, a bit sadly, “I don’t even want to go really, but it seems silly not to now that I’ve decided to stay,” she shrugged and looked back at Severus, “How about you?”
Severus felt his face warm, he shook his head in a feeble attempt to conceal a blush, “I don’t think I’ll go” he said, and Lily raised an eyebrow quizzically “I mean, no I’m not going with anyone,” he said very pointedly.
Lily suddenly felt the air between them change, and something about it made her feel a bit nervous.
“H-have you asked anyone?” she enquired, though a little hesitantly.
Severus chuckled to himself and looked at her.
“Of course I haven’t,” they both smiled.
The bells for dinner rang out at that moment, startling Severus out of his seat.
“I’ll see you later then,” he said, hurrying off towards the Slytherin table.
“See you later,” she called out, as her Gryffindor friends began to arrive to take their seats.
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