#she would feel bound to accept tom asking if he could sleep with greg

[watchfuldeer]

last night i went to a really fun and informal fundraiser evening with jesse and lucy at westminster school, where they were interviewing each other. i got to ask a question which i’ve mused upon for some time about tom, shiv and greg. enjoy! full transcript under cut

Transcript

me: so i’m gonna have to look at what i wrote down.

jesse: that’s alright, you’re highly in credit since you know more about the show than us. more about john berryman.

(laughter)

lucy: tell us what we’ve done wrong so far!

me: god, no. i wouldn’t! so my question, this is a character based question, and one thing that probably got a bit subsumed in the fourth season just because everything was happening. but i’d like to know more about tom and shiv, and also greg. because my read on the situation between the three of them is that greg is a source of marital strife (laughter) that shiv never noticed, and what would it have taken for shiv to notice the depth of greg’s presence in their marriage.

jesse: uh huh.

me: and tom’s attachment to him.

jesse: uh huh. sometimes you get little bits in life or you see something and you’re like, i wish we were making the show, because i suddenly do want to hear shiv say ‘greg you’re a source of marital strife’.

(laughter)

jesse: that’s like, when you’re like, that’s gonna be in, we’re not gonna cut that.

lucy: absolutely.

jesse: (doing greg voice) wh-wh-what?!

(laughter)

lucy: yeah. well we enjoyed that, didn’t we. we had a scene in america decides, which was the only scene between shiv and greg.

jesse: oh yeah.

lucy: the election episode in the final season where she takes him into a little room and threatens him.

me: ah, but it’s jealousy over lukas, over the greg and lukas thing, and it’s like, have you forgotten your husband, who is also very attached to this limpet?

lucy: yeah. i would also say that there are marriages in which a third party is not an unuseful thing, as well. not in a forgiving way about infidelity, but i would say that there are things that tom can express with and at and on greg (laughter) as it were, to greg, that are useful because he’s both a - you know the great, the interesting thing about tom is that he’s both a courtier and a bully. he’s that rare combination of someone who you totally believe as being almost like (mimes bowing and doffing cap) ‘oh yes sorry thank you yes ma’am’ and also like, ‘i’m gonna kill you’ and that juxtaposition is what makes him so interesting.

but in his marriage to shiv he has no real way, until quite late i guess in the final season, where we explore it, to hold power over her and to use that part of himself. so he’s accepted the acquiescing, he’s accepted the role of courtier in that marriage, and greg is quite a useful place where he gets to express all of that, the bully in him so that maybe it doesn’t have to come out in the marriage. which might be bad, because perhaps it should do and then the marriage would’ve ended much earlier, yknow, when shiv would just be like ‘i’m not dealing with you challenging me in any way’. so it’s not until that balcony scene i think where he really challengers her much at all. possibly the beach scene, where he sort of says that he’s considered leaving her, and how that would feel. but with aggressive challenge? it’s all directed at greg, and greg is allowed to be the place where all those feelings go.

me: but the affection - there’s also affection between them.

jesse: YEAH. and i think that’s the other thing maybe you’re alluding to is like, she… i think, some things you know you’re putting in the show because you talk about them and other things just naturally occur, and audiences and people tell you what the show is and what you put in there and you didn’t even realise, but i think we were aware of this - she’s oblivious. her obliviousness is a big part of her wealth and her upbringing and… so there’s something homoerotic going on between greg and tom.

me: i mean it’s not for me to say.

(laughter)

jesse: and does she… i think there’s two ways of reading that, either she’s oblivious, and that’s intriguing and possible. the other is that she sort of - there’s a scene in, you know that one, in the sun valley media conference in argestes, where we wrote a bit where shiv shows up unexpected and tom’s sort of flirting with someone, and it never really landed that much. i think we were like, oh this really gonna, shiv’s gonna spark up when she sees him flirting with someone. and it’s one of those things where you were like, you know what? i don’t think she gives a hoot, really, does she.

(laughter)

jesse: it’s like, she hasn’t got that, that’s not in her belly, that fear of loss.

lucy: no.

jesse: so i think that goes, that probably goes for a same-sex relationship or flirtation as much as it does for with a woman.

lucy: i think that’s true.

jesse: like she really… even if he was like - and this is not the way that tom would be like - ‘i think i’d like to sleep with greg’, i think she’d be like (mimes looking at watch) ‘when?’.

(laughter)

jesse: (as shiv) ‘not when i’m in the city, that’s weird, tom’.

(laughter)

jesse: i don’t think she’d have any fundamental objection to that.

lucy: that’s true. i think jealousy is quite a low status emotion.

jesse: yes.

lucy: and i think that she would struggle to feel it.

(jesse laughs)

lucy: even if it was present in some way, she would never be able to access it because it would put her too much at a disadvantage. so i think yeah exactly that, it would be like, ‘oh i guess you’re going to fuck that boring woman now are you, tom’ or do that, like… she has to be here (mimes one hand above another hand) so jealousy can’t really be accessed by her. so she might be irritated by greg, but in the way you would be by a mosquito.

me: to her detriment.

lucy: to her detriment, sure, ultimately yeah.

[high-functioning-lokipath]

SH - Songfic! One-sided!John x Reader, Sherlock x reader - Someone Like You - Word Count: (including lyrics) 1,278

I heard that you're settled down

That you found a girl and you're married now

I heard that your dreams came true

Guess she gave you things, I didn't give to you

"Hi John! It's Y/N! How're you?" You'd lost contact with your best friend/crush after he went to war. You knew he'd survived because you may have scoured the internet for anything on him and found his blog with info on where he lived now. You lived in America now and simply didn't have the money to travel there. It took you a long time though to track down his number. Even so, it took you years to work up the nerve to call. Once you did, and once you started catching up, you almost wished you'd left the memory as it was.

Old friend, why are you so shy?

Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light

It took him hours on the phone to finally admit that he'd gotten engaged. The wedding was in a few months. He asked if you wanted to come but you said you'd never have the money and not to worry. He seemed happier than ever being in a relationship but he didn't seem to want to talk about it with you. You finally said your goodbyes and you cried yourself to sleep.

I hate to turn up out of the blue, uninvited

But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it

London. You never thought you'd be back here. It smelled right. It felt right. But you were scared. John had told you where he lived. But you decided to go meet his famous ex-flatmate first. Sherlock liked you. He actually approved of you. Of that you were both glad and flattered. You loved John. Sherlock was nice but you hadn't felt the spark you had with John. Maybe you just didn't want to. The one thing that did draw you closer together was that you both were dealing with the inescapable and quickly approaching loss of John.

I had hoped you'd see my face

And that you'd be reminded that for me, it isn't over

John knew. He'd always known. He loved you too when you were younger. But ever since he came back from Afghanistan, he was scared. Scared to see you and fall back in love. He didn't want to burden you with the broken man he'd become.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you, too

He found Mary and couldn't believe it. He actually loved her. She had helped him immensely and changed his life. She reminded him of you in some ways. But he realized he had moved on.

"Don't forget me, " I beg

"I'll remember, " you said

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

He still thought of you. When you called he was happy to hear from you. But he just didn't love you anymore. You realized you'd waited too long. You had been too scared and he hadn't been able to wait for you.

You know how the time flies

Only yesterday was the time of our lives

We were born and raised in a summer haze

Bound by the surprise of our glory days

Growing up, John and you had been inseparable. School, weekends, summer vacations, graduation; you did everything together. You couldn't imagine living without him.

I hate to turn up out of the blue, uninvited

But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it

I had hoped you'd see my face

And that you'd be reminded that for me, it isn't over

Somehow, John still didn't know you were in London. It had been months since you arrived. Sherlock invited you to stay with him at 221B and you accepted. You helped Sherlock with his best man speech and he begged you to come with him to the wedding. You hesitantly accepted after much convincing.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you, too

If only you could have recorded John's surprise when he saw you arrive early with Sherlock. You took your seat of course, since Sherlock had Janine to walk in with but it was actually kind of fun to watch the preparation. As you watched them run around making last minute adjustments, you found yourself watching Sherlock, not John. Sherlock was quite the man. Tall, handsome, kind in his own way, and helpful to his true friends. Your spirits began to lift and you could almost feel your heart letting go of John.

"Don't forget me, " I begged

"I'll remember, " you said

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

It still hurt watching the vows and you knew you'd never forget your love for John but you had a newfound joy. Sherlock had been quite nice and friendly with you over the past few months. You'd learned to read him fairly well and perhaps he liked you. Maybe this relationship would be the one to last. But you knew you couldn't wait too long.

Nothing compares, no worries or cares

Regrets and mistakes, they're memories made

Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

At the reception, Sherlock introduced you to Greg, Molly, and Tom. You knew Mrs. Hudson of course. You sat with them and watched as Sherlock delivered his speech. After Sherlock played his special waltz for John and Mary, you saw him wandering a little.

"Sherlock!" You called out, seeing him head for the door. "Leaving so soon?"

"I, um, I'm not really needed here any longer. I was just going to-"

"I need you." He looked at you quizily. "To dance with me and keep me company. Please Sherlock?"

"Alright," He replied. You headed back to the dance floor together. He put one hand on your waist and took your other hand in his. Midway through the song you closed your eyes, enjoying the moment. You sighed contentedly. "Are you alright?"

"Quite."

"I am," He paused for a moment "I am pleased you're feeling well considering, erm," he cut himself off, not wanting to address the matter directly.

"I've found someone new," you replied simply.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you

"Don't forget me, " I beg

"I'll remember, " you said

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

"Are you sure you want to pursue this?"

"Yes, Sherlock. I've thought it over all day."

"Only today? I don't think you know what you're getting into."

"Trust me, Sherlock."

"Ok, I suppose we could try," he replied. A small smile was playing on the corners of his lips.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you, too

"Don't forget me, " I begged

"I'll remember, " you said

Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead

"So, you and Sherlock, huh?" John asked. His feelings were obviously mixed. Slightly jealous but happy for you both.

"Yep," Sherlock replied for you, popping the P.

"Well, I wish you the best," John replied whole-heartedly.

"I wish you and Mary the best as well, John." You gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Thank you."

"For what? I'm the one who broke your heart," he said guiltily.

"If it wasn't for you, I'd have never met the love of my life." He smiled. "You may want to start writing your best man speech, John," You joked. "I don't see this relationship fading at all. This one's built to last."