#sighs. i'll think about it. maybe ask 2morrow since he's home ...
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I really need to ask my brother if [redacted] will take me back or if he can get me an in somewhere else, but ...
#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ#'why r u up @ 2am' no questions#... inexplicably cant sleep. not like it hasnt happened before but not in a while i dont think?#or at least not this long. anyways#i dont think i ever Formally quit i was just like . immature & a little bad at decisions. to try to be fair.#but they didn't have need of me so much i dont think so /shrug#i could do it again ... maybe.#well; that's only if they let me. things have changed so much they probably don't even need me and i wonder if the environment would be#[...] hostile. idk.#like i'm not even sure if he COULD get me in anywhere else? autistic guy who is Scared Of Everything(?) is not an easy sell i dont think.#or. i'm not out to my brother so like autistic Queer (it's at least a little obvious) who is Scared Of Everything. like im just not#[...] confident in my ability to work somewhere#also i would have to drive ......... well i assume so anyways. dèpends#i just dont talk to him.... its hard. i've had opportunities & then i just . dont.#like we already dont talk but i almost feel like if he had something i could do he would say so? ???#like it's Weird to ask. + what if he says no. what do i do then. explode?#sighs. i'll think about it. maybe ask 2morrow since he's home ...
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