#so im. practicing so i dont keep singing the wrong version

[trevination]

anyone awake for me to post my cover of great expectations

[infinitelytheheartexpands]

Responses from the Opera Screencaps Captioning Quiz

Hello, everyone, and thank you for taking my quiz! I had SO MUCH fun reading your captions-- there were several times I literally started crying from laughing so hard at the amazingness of your work! With that in mind, the captions (which I will continue to add onto as more people take it):

(also, thank you to @dichterfuerstin​ for translating the German captions I got)

originally taken from: the Wiener Staatsoper’s 2020 production of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart’s Die Entführung aus dem Serail, featuring Regula Mühlemann (center) as Blonde, Michael Laurenz (right) as Pedrillo, and an unnamed extra (left) as the Grim Reaper

Responses:

(Backstage warm-up) “ok so someone dropped the pulse”

me and my friends watching the fire burn after doing arson

Introducing the polycule to the parents

*boom* ... did...you guys hear that too?

Ma Signor !

Knight in whinging armour gone wrong, look at how he holds the egg. Polyamory with weird knight and death.

the father, son and the holy ghost are very gay

the gays meeting for brunch, 2021, colorized

chicken lady forces death and a very flamboyantly homosexual anthropomorphized pink bird to be parents of her egg (they dont want to be)

That’s just me and my friends on our night out (before covid rip)-- closest

A Good Friday night

good omens (2019)

["the pocket guide to boy/girl/mischief" meme] who's the boy and who's the mischief though????

Papageno and Papagena take their first-born egg trick-or-treating

Angry Birds - The Musical. A pig stole an egg and the bird unites with death to take revenge.

I love my bird wife

Someone got murdered during the funky chicken dance

throuple murders child and steals sibling of said child

When you and your friends have widely different tastes in literature

angel leading twink to his rightful place (hell)

draco malfoy from a very potter musical and a death eater are very much in the wrong show

What have I gotten myself into

Mlm/wlw solidarity but I’m not telling who is who

A woman stands with a pink dipshit with an egg and a reaper.

A bird-couple makes a pact with Death, sacrificing their first-born bird-child in order to bring good luck upon their unborn bird-baby

There are three types of people on Halloween:

Uh oh, I don’t think the mother hen is very happy about this...

oh god, they’ve invented seussical. It’s too early!

gay brunch

Three little maids from school are we

guys maybe if we dress gay enough we can distract everyone from the dead flapper bee in the back

those three killed a duck for her egg and are facing the conswquences.

Duck has egg with human, shocked and upset due to biological impossibility

When you bout to make a banging omelet so you invite your fellow queers

"No mortal man could pass that egg, but heaven shall repair your rectum."

originally taken from: the Salzburg Festival’s 2007 production of Hector Berlioz’s Benvenuto Cellini, featuring Maija Kovalevska (left) as Teresa Balducci, Laurent Naouri (center, in chimney) as Fieramosca, and Burkhard Fritz (right) as Benvenuto Cellini

Responses:

“In this same interlude it doth befall That I, one Snout by name, present a wall; And such a wall, as I would have you think, That had in it a crannied hole or chink, Through which the lovers, Pyramus and Thisby, Did whisper often very secretly. This loam, this rough-cast and this stone doth show That I am that same wall; the truth is so: And this the cranny is, right and sinister, Through which the fearful lovers are to whisper.” - a midsummer night’s dream, act v scene 1

"ah yes a prime specimen. see here, right in this box is our one of a kind hob goblin that can be all yours for the low low price of your soul"

what, YOU don't have a special eavesdropping chimney window?

Hänsel und Gretel plotting against the witch

man takes a wrong turn and ends up in a chimney, catches his girlfriend cheating-- closest

when you end up third wheeling the straight couple

lady cheats on her leather jacket wearing scummy boyfriend and when he unexpectedly comes home she hides the lover in the chimney

A straight girl and her gay best friend gossip about stuff idk

Idk Shakespeare?

experimental couples therapy feat. the chimney mf from mary poppins

Area Couple Inadvertently Traps Santa-in-Training in Chimney as they Attempt Rooftop Flirting

Landlords laugh over student renter's misfortune

I never asked for this

Ay yo lil mama lemme whisper in your ear

voyeurist listens to sandy and Danny from grease

Psssst! Did you hear about Susan? You won’t believe it!

lady and the tramp meets beauty and the beast?

human trafficking

And for just $30 you too could have your own tiny brick cage!

Psst I’m wearing assless chaps under this dress

A couple tortures a man in a box.

It's all fun and games being stuck in a chimney until your greasy uncle steals your crush from right above you-- okay ngl this could actually be a great Don Pasquale concept

Taking eavesdropping to the next level

Will you two stop being lovey dovey and let me out? SUMMER LOVIN, HAPPENED SO FAST— 

overhearing how people talk about you when they think they're alone puts you in the shithouse 

Does he know we can see him?

dear god, i am so fucking hungry, yall please just do whatever heterosexuals do so i can go eat a popsicle 

the human version of the trash man from sesame street is realizing that those two are going to fuck on his trash can 

Tmw you capture an angry short dude and start trashtalking him where he can hear 

Omg what if we kissed but we actually kissed the lil goblin man under us

"Remember, don't feed him after midnight"

originally taken from: the Théâtre de Capitole du Toulouse’s 2017 staging of Giacomo Meyerbeer’s Le prophète, featuring Leonardo Estevez (right, on fake horse) as Le Comte d’Oberthal

Responses:

“When I said we needed to drain the swamp I didn’t think there were people actually living there”

horse? what horse? no sir i dont know what horse youre referring to.

definitely don't have a napoleon complex going on

King stole La Scala‘s Lohengrin set

king breaks all his horses, has to use statue dragged by servants as transportation because he’s too kingly too walk

Emperor Söder and his subjects on a carnival procession

man on horse makes a big deal out of being on a horse

That’s not Zeffirelli because the horse is not alive

Who the fuck put a horse on the stage

isn't this that picture of napoleon on the horse

Area Count Thinks Citizens will be Intimidated by his Extremely Fake-looking Horse Statue-- closest

Everyone wants their turn on the giant plaster horse. Police are there to make sure everyone waits their turn.

Night out with the lads

Local royalty horrified at the state of his own damn kingdom

gay army fights different gay aesthetics-- hi author how does it feel to be the funniest fucking person on this quiz

Well at least I LOOK badass

ceasar if he hadn't gotten stabbed (colourised)

some soldiers jumped out of my kindergarten fairytale collection book to burn the don carlos flemish deputies at the stake

It’s just a model

Is that how you feel pulling up in your Honda Civic, Madge?

Someone rides a horse statue in public.

Just a normal party with the bros.

what is this, some kind of crossover episode? 

Terribly sorry for all the fuss, it’s just, that is, my horse is afraid of neck ruffles. I’ve tried to talk to him about it, but he’s—whoaaa there—he said he was a french courtier in a past life and he’s allergic to English fashion 

Horse seller, listen to me! I am riding into battle. I need your strongest horse. - We have horses at home. - The horses at home: 

All hail Incitatus the king 

we are not ripping off shakespeare’s henry viii. what the fuck. this is about lenny xi you uncultured swine, go drown in a pit of your own farts 

oh god is that hamilton 

Guy Removed From Art Museum For Sitting On Statue, more at eleven 

Gay <3

Officer: This horse... is a virgin! Crowd: *cheers*

originally taken from: the Parma Verdi Festival’s 2017 staging of Giuseppe Verdi’s Stiffelio, featuring Maria Katzarava (left) as Lina and Luciano Ganci (right) as Stiffelio

Responses:

That One kid in class

its a mEntAL BreAkDowN *final countdown but kazoo*

*record scratch* yeah, that's me. you're probably wondering how I got here-- closest

Dad keeps monologuing, teenager is done

left: all of my concerned friends, right: my emo ass having a very public mental breakdown

the demons in the corner of my room when im just trying to sleep

lady gets mansplained to (do i need to say more, we've all been there)

It’s probably an area baritone telling off an area soprano-- sorry; it’s a tenor. soprano is right though.

That was a fake horse in the last photo right?

child comes out as gay to father at a particularly bad time

dissociation solves everything

I can't believe it's not butter

Honey we talked about this

My sleep paralysis demon is Crowley from supernatural

child has nightmare of boring job

When you start dating a singer but he won’t stop practicing at night

just an average day in a hetero marriage

what do i do my wife's having period cramps again

Stop having an existential crisis. It’s time to sing!

“No son of mine will kin Gomez Addams under MY roof”

Crowley stares into space while a teen has post nut clarity.

When he wont stop reciting jordan peterson monologues!!

Do you realize how effed you are?

Ugh, not this lecture again! Dad’s Practicing For His Experimental Indie Band Again 

asking your parents for help with your own personal situation and them just ranting off about what they went through instead of helping in any way 

Will he shut up already!

no one tell him he’s yelling in the wrong direction, no one tell him plnsbdjddhdj 

this kid is tired of his dad listening to rush limbaugh (a man who claimed to be pro life but died anyway) 

Me internally vs externally 

Daddy issues

originally taken from: the Grand Théâtre de Genève’s 2020 staging of Giacomo Meyerbeer’s Les Huguenots, featuring several chorus members

Responses:

It’s the deadly eye Of Poogley-pie. Look away, look away, As you walk by, ‘Cause whoever looks right at it Surely will die. It’s a good thing you didn’t … You did? … Good-bye. - shel Silverstein

why the fuckith? my good sir, i beg of you to put your pants back on

I hate this itchy hat

Titanic Extras hear that they have to do extra hours

people waiting to board the titanic watch someone fall off the plank

pov: you’re a time traveler

guy in the flatcap is embarrassed by patriotism and pathos

No idea. For some reason Le Marseillaise comes to mind

Is this from Harry Potter?

disneyland main street usa workers on strike

local tries to hide behind Newsies cap to avoid unpleasant but inevitable conversations. meanwhile, some very fashionable ladies look on.

"Thank fuck, 2020 was just a dream after all"

“We gather here today because this bitch got exactly what she deserved” “heaven!” “Stfu Stephanie she’s going to hell and we all know it”-- not quite but this basically happens later on in the opera (and act) so yeah (except the person in question very much Did Not Deserve It)

dc movie filter on bridgerton

america?

looks like my history teacher paused the prohibition documentary again

Who still wears page boy hats bro?

Coming out to a room of people who Already Knew That

Bitches are relieved at some party.

Several drunk people exiting getting off the subway attempting to seem sober and rational but realizing they have somehow lost all of their possessions

How tf do I act natural in this situation-- closest

“do you think any of them noticed that I don’t know the pledge of allegiance” 

It's too fucking hot outside for this outfit 

?

when hyyh yoonkook ending just hits different 

pedestrians watch in horror as the triangle shirtwaist factory burns and the workers throw themselves out of the windows from a dozen stories up 

Starting the pledge of allegiance be like 

He's having a heart attack oh no oh god oh fuck

originally taken from: if I remember correctly, the Semperoper Dresden’s 2018 semi-staging of Johann Strauss II’s Die Fledermaus, with Jonas Kaufmann as Gabriel von Eisenstein

Responses:

“William Shakespeare wrote: "To thine own self be true And it must follow, as the night the day Thou canst not then be false to any man" I believe this wise statement best applies to a woman A blonde woman Over the past three years she taught me And showed us all That being true to yourself never goes out of style Ladies and gentlemen Our valedictorian: Elle Woods!” - legally blonde the musical

eat ass, suck a dick, and sell drugs

woooooorrrrd

Finally Jonas has graduated! It’s about time, considering he’s an international star.

what my professors think they look like

Prof. Dr. Dr. When someone tells him there are more than two genders

'and since you've now graduated high school, you'll be entering college etc. blablabla' .........meanwhile, there's a whole row of graduates daring each other to chug the cheap vodka one of them has brought in gallons (yes that happened at my graduation, lol)

Jonas darling baby <3-- can’t argue with that

I just realized I have no idea what the actual fuck happens in an opera

ok this one is just what jonas kaufmann always wears you can't fool me.

"as valedictorian i will share with you the importance of loving the floor"

"Yes, mother, my art degree will make me money!"

Graduation speakers are out, singers are in

Senior year takes a new meaninbg

mansplainer professor explains the concept of feminism to women

Your Prof when you finally turn in that missing assignment be like

younger boris johnson (derogatory)

jonas kaufmann retires from opera and takes up motivational speaking

What a fine graduation evening we’re having today

-70 points for slytherin you all have no swag

A man with a college hat sings.

An obviously greying actor trying to play a university student in a low-budget porn parody

How it feels to graduate high school after being held back for years

East High is a place where teachers encouraged us to break the status quo and define ourselves as we choose. Where a jock can cook up a mean crème brûlée, and a brainiac can break it down on the dance floor-

I may not have been "cool" in high school, but in ten years you will all be working for me!

I finally got my GED!

that one guy in ur intro to cultural anthropology class who mansplains to the professor somehow fucking graduated

he;s just graduating and taking his speech too serously idk

Graduation speeches with that one dude who got held back 3 times

Smrt

originally taken from: the Metropolitan Opera’s 2011 staging of Gioachino Rossini’s Le Comte Ory with Joyce DiDonato (left) as Isolier, Diana Damrau (center) as Countess Adèle, and Juan Diego Florez (right) as Le Comte Ory (disguised as a hermit)

Responses:

There is something very [disturbing grunts] About polyamorous couples - polyamorous, Chris Fleming

jinkies

femme fatale (including to herself)

I’ll have a threesome soon !

Hot guy walks by, everyone swoons.

thirdwheeling friend does not realize the other two are having sex

When your girlfriend had „just two beers“ again

jesus is exasperated about having to drag the two ladies towards doing what he needs them to do instead of purple dramatically declaring suicidal intent over the smallest trivial matters and red being equally dramatic about declaring that it's not the way! stay alive! i love you!!

The throuple is thriving

Get off the milf

orgy

my last three braincells because im a horny slut

countess receives too much love and is confused on how to react

Rasputin's lesser known romp with a much older czarina of russia

Woman's soul leaves body

Jesus and co. are worried after another woman gets pregnant without having sex

bisexual looks at photos of celebrity couples

When you go to the party to socialize with new people but your weirdo friend group starts getting clingy

Jesus cumming

one of those weird church christmas pageants but everybody's drunk

What have I done

Hozier??????????

Jesus assfucks some purple lady being hugged.

This time, the chick IS the magnet

An affair/threesome gone awry (2019 colorized)

What do you mean they canceled GLOW?

“I TOLD you it was cashmere!”

Are you wearing the - - The Gucci dress? Yes I am.

It's not what it looks like!

jesus is fucking that one cheerleader who grew up to be a suburban mom with one (1) super cool dress she stole from her kid who is desperately hugging her middle begging for it back because the spring fling is coming up and jason might actually make eye contact with her for more than three seconds.

jesus and mary magdaline and some other bitch

I’m at a bar and these drunk girls are flirting with me, do I lOOK GAY?!

Shrek 5, jesus's return

c. 2025 First attempt of an Officer and his Wife with a Handmaiden (colourized)

just about all of these are close lol

originally taken from: the Bolshoi Theater’s 1993 staging of Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky’s The Maid of Orléans, featuring Nina Rautio (left) as Joan of Arc and Vyacheslav Pochapsky (right) as Thibaut d’Arc

Responses:

Don’t look, I’m still pooping

yall, the audacity of this man. he fuckin talked to me

*i can't even tell you how wrong you are* *it would be insulting to ME*-- closest

Cospeto!

„No I’m not talking to you, you keep cracking bad jokes!“ - „But I got another!“

when you’re mad at him but he says he’ll buy you food if you cheer up

When I’m wallowing in self-pity but my friends won’t comfort me

right: wanna fuck ;) left: yeah, fuck OFF lmao

Her face is screaming “don’t tell me what to do”

Yeah I got nothing

gay man tries to hit on a lesbian bc he thinks she's a twink. she's not amused but she's watching this happen anyway

me tired of MET's bullshit and them organising a Netrebko, known blackface apologist, a recital during Black History Month. (sorry im still fucking salty lol)

"stop smiling at me like that I'm trying to pout over here"

"I got fleas, you got fleas... wanna fuck?"

I have the best idea!

Haha nooooo don’t hit me with that bat you’re so sexxyy

lesbian is bothered by dilf

Me trying to flirt

if call me by your name was hetero and set in america

how many more dad jokes can i take before i explode

So. You’ve gotten yourself in a little pickle again.

What if we fought in the Russian revolution together ✨???????... unless??

Two people flirt in a poor place of town/

"If you ask me what I've got under this dirty, shapeless tunic one more time I swear to god I will kick your rotting teeth in"

You look like ur gonna kill me but ok

Really? You again?

Okay, I’ve been sitting here for 20 minutes, do you think it’s safe to—oh god, he’s still there.

Have you seen Godot?

she is tired of everyone’s shit. she has done so many derivatives it physically pains her to see a variable. dont test her. ur icarus rn.

idk pick better pictures-- I HAVE DIED THE SHEER AUDACITY AND HUBRIS I LOVE THIS

200% done with your crap 

Homeless man has fucking legs of steel n is gonna show off his Russian dance moves

originally taken from: the Théâtre de Capitole du Toulouse’s 2019 staging of Paul Dukas’ Ariane et Barbe-bleue, featuring Sophie Koch (right) as Ariane and I don’t remember who the person on the left is rip me

Responses:

The knight who wore this into battle sure was swaggy

dear god its hiddeous

Capitalism

Knight in shining armour gone even more wrong.

ghost contemplates the safety of spiky motorcycle helmet

„Stop! He feels bullied!“

'this is my newest take for jesus's crucifixion crown ...... what do you mean they already put him up'

That’s probably a really expensive magic helmet idk. IDK-- closest

Omg I love the adventure zone!

minesweeper (windows xp)

"Okay whatever you do don't touch the shiny spiky ball" "It's so shiny I wanna touch it"

Taking down the trash way too late

IT'S NOT A PHASE MOM

Darth Vader got stuck in the freezer.... again. Leia isn’t happy

Star Wars 2030

“And here is the very latest in motorcycle helmet trends” “Look, I only came to the mall for a pair of socks “

futuristic kkk

long-suffering jewelry store attendant really wants to retire

Put it down put it down put it down

“Hmm no you should see a doctor about that”

A weird ass crown is presented

The creation of sars-cov-2: an experimental Eurotrance nightclub art piece gone horribly wrong

How it feels to want something that u cant have

AND WE WILL CALL IT—SPIKE MAN actually do you think that’s too obvious?? Because of the—yeah, because of the spikes?? See, that’s what I’m worried about. I want it to be SCARY

I know it's risky but... lube me up

?

use the force luke.

that is a weird fleshlight

When you get an ugly gift and need to find a way to get rid of it, so your family member/friend offers to smash it

Touch the orb

originally taken from: the Opera Vlaanderen’s 2019 staging of Fromental Halévy’s La Juive, with Nicole Chevalier (left, with bottle) as Princess Eudoxie, Enea Scala (center, under table) as Prince Léopold, and Roy Cornelius Smith (right) as Éléazar

Responses:

When no one comes to your birthday party :(

fantastic, day 487 of mischief and they have yet to find my masterful hiding spot

i really wonder who he thinks he's playing footsie with

Marriage crisis. Reason sits under the table-- closest but not in the way you think (after all, the man under the table IS a tenor).

the last supper afterparty after jesus left

When you order the last supper on wish

espionage at the Politischer Rosenmontag

Probably the wrong opera but is that Leporello under the table

Now THIS is a Good Friday night

this was every birthday party i went to between the ages of 5 and 11

that awkward moment when you drop your fork under the table but when you re-emerge everyone else has left except one drunk lady and the guy trying to deal with her

After the last supper

Tfw you arrive to the dinner party too early and have to hide until a more fashionable hour

When the cishets aren’t home

waiter hides from customers

Nobody: My dog every time I’m eating:

what's left of the homies Jesus had dinner with

university chem lab experiment gone terribly wrong

I’ve been under the table FOR 30 MINUTES

Set your friends up by tossing them off under the table, they’ll think it’s each other n fall in luv

Someone hids under a table

"You're about to see an surreptitious-under-the-table-dick-sucking master at work"

5 yr old me trying to eat the desert under the table without my parents finding out be like:

They never invite me to their parties!

Just another girl’s night in

Oops! Didn’t notice you the table.

dionysus - bts (2019, colorized)

just a normal episode of eric andre (eric is the one under the table)

Just a normal day with the boys

Thievery

originally taken from: the Théâtre de Capitole du Toulouse’s 2017 staging of Giacomo Meyerbeer’s Le prophète, featuring Kate Aldrich (left, surrounded by women in white) as Fidès and John Osborn (center, looking like a Jesus doppelganger) as Jean de Leyde

Responses:

Hold up, is that Eggman above Jesus?

holy disco

Looks like Tannhäuser. Our lord and saviour Richard Wagner. Now I need to be saved from that.

catholicism

me defending pineapple on pizza (THANK YOU)

jesus but hes about to be abducted by the alien ufo above him

Emmmmmmm Heaven? Idk

Lord of the rings?

ewww christianity gross

"behold, I am Important"

"Seriously?? It's not ACTUALLY pyjama day? Fuck you guys!"

Jesus at the Disco

Jesus Finds The Molerat People Who Live Under Bethlehem

disco is heaven

Want to join my new religion?

the kkk

church christmas pageant where everyone's sober but it's based on the director's fever dream

Am I the only one who sees the giant demon? Just me? Okay...

“Oh god I think I’m starting my period”

A party is held with a priest in the middle

"Let's get this secret Vatican sex party rolling!"

The new avengers endgame set is looking great!!

You know, guys, I try not to be a bother but...I can’t help but feel like I missed a dress code memo for this wedding??? It’s cocktail, right??”

Jesus visits Hogwarts

I must really stink if no one will even come close to me

the extra ass funeral i DESERVE

star wars life day

A cult at it’s best-- closest

Shrek 5, Jesus is still there I guess

originally taken from: the Royal Opera House, Covent Garden’s 2013 staging of Giuseppe Verdi’s Les vêpres siciliennes, featuring Bryan Hymel (left, standing) as Henri, Lianna Haroutounian (center, kneeling in the black gown) as Duchess Hélène, and Erwin Schrott (kneeling to her right) as Jean Procida

Responses:

When the director’s like “great rehearsal guys, just a few notes before I let you go” but it’s already 9:13 and your mom’s waiting in the parking lot

loyalist of subjects

bow before your queen

They forgot to take down the stage boxes after the Vienna opera ball but the show must go on.

somebody forgot to book chairs for this funeral

Me sharing God’s (Hayley koyoko) word on the discord server

mass execution bc the oboe solo sucked ass-- closest

That’s too many black suits I can’t see shit

I can’t even tell what’s going on here

8th grade school assembly about how it's uncool to shit on the walls at school

let's all get fancy so we can go to the opera and sit on the stage (idk this one's hard lol)

"Yes i am a time traveller, now don't freak out"

Tfw you forget to pay your lighting bills

White guys make decisions that will benefit them and screw someone that’s not a white guy over-- OUCH but that is too real (although not really in context here)

dead man gives speech at his own funeral

brotus and the boys ??? last meeting before the stabbing

high society social function ends in mass murder-- right opera, wrong scene

Someone walks into the talent show stage with a dog

Black-dressed bitches worship a man.

Worst school assembly of all time

POV:You're the window in the classroom and someone said "its snowing"

When the conductor shows up fashionably late to the orchestra concert

That's what you get for choosing the cheapest ticket option, get back in the mud where you belong

?

theyre just trying to jump into a grave at a funeral leabe them alone this is normal

oh my god he really whipped his dick out in front of everyone, this is just like in 1776 guys, except some women are actually in the room this time,

A funeral, stop wearing so much black

I want to slap their bald heads like rice

originally taken from: the Teatro Real Madrid’s 2018 staging of Gaetano Donizetti’s Lucia di Lammermoor, featuring Roberto Tagliavini (right) as Raimondo

Responses:

Crowd “haha!! Looks like someone missed the all-black memo!! Now it’s laugh-in-your-face time! / Guy on the floor (whispering to guy against wall): go, save yourself! I’ll hold them off...”

if i leave now i wont be a witness and can tell the police i had no idea

it was the best of times, it was the worst of times

Guy in the back pretends to help but is to far away to even know what’s going on.

priest walks in on beginning of an orgy, contemplated joining but is too scared-

when someone brings up capitalism but you’re just trying to play minecraft

lol lets trample this guy while the judge isnt looking

Again. Too many black costumes

Loved this Dostoevsky novel

i would know if opera directors were more creative with clothing choices ngl

me on parties lol

"imma just sneak out of here while everyone else is distracted"

"Where did he get this flooring!? Amazing!"

Everyone act normal!

The tell tale heart but they got REALLY drunk

man tposes to ward off vampires after being caught undercover

boys ???? night

the priest really shouldn't have visited the insane asylum-- closest

He’s FINE everyone’s been hit by a car before

Something happens in a room.

Perks of being a wallflower

There's always that one person in the fight whos trying not to get involved when they really wanna

Oh good, they’re all posing for a Rembrandt painting, I can just sneeeeaaak out the back here...

The gamer livestreaming Resident Evil + everyone watching the stream ? waiting for him to open the door just knowing it will trigger a chase scene

Quick!

the guy t posing in the back is regretting his every decision.-- also accurate

the us senate jumps ted cruz, some other wack ass gop senator is trying to sneak away

...I spoke too soon, however this is a James Bond mission

Queers help fellow queer do math but it's a struggle

[sillyandquiteawkward]

ive had this list of all the steam powered giraffe songs listed in order of my favorite to least favorite in each album, but i havent done anything with it and i made the list last year. thought id might as well post it!

each song has a little blurb about that song, and the reason i like it. strictly my opinions on the songs, but i tried to include some of the technical stuff so if you hadnt heard the song before, you could get a Feel of it.

album one

steam man band - wonderful lyrics and vocals! the robotic twinge i lovely and i wish this was longer. i love the lyric “count to twenty, one is plenty”

clockwork vaudeville - a charming song about a boy seeing the robots for the first time at a fair and you feel it in every note. theres a part where the spine switches to a more harsh voice and it works wonderfully to contrast the smoothness of thus far.

electricity is in my soul - again, i love the robotic edge this song has, but it also is smooth. the lyrics and vocals are amazing. so fun to sing along to.

brass goggles - the first song i heard of them, the three part harmonies are to die for and rabbit kills it. in the original version, the voices are super busy and super robotic and tbh its my fav version because of this. i adore when they split into three parts and sing their own thing.

sound of tomorrow - i love the chorus, especially the echo the spine does. love all the weird lyrics the jon sings.

blind minstrels ballad - i love how ambient and mysterious it is. sets the mood for a story. i love the jons voice.

steam man band reprise - i love michaels voice and the staticy effects the band had a lot of in this album. the lyrics work really well and i wish this was longer.

captain albert alexander - one of my favorite hero songs, caa is a whirlwind adventure of a man who loves the sea. i love the story line and it hits you hard emotionally

out in the rain - ambiance! i love the mood this song sets.

on top of the universe - a cute song about being in love, very charming and captures the feeling of falling in love at first sight. i love the end part where the spine has to be beat up.

ice cream parade - hilarious! works well as a skit but the song itself is messy. i like the horse adventure part (of course i start to like it when the spine starts singing).

2cent show

automatonic electronic harmonics - western vibes but keep the steam punk feel! robotic themed but focused around the spines feeling and experiences. i love the screaming. the second spg song i listened to.

circuitry - i cant understand what their saying, but i love the robotic screeching and words you can just barely understand. a circusy feeling.

juju magic - the jon kills it with the mood again, i love that you have that steamboat feel, but now everything is going crazy. nothing is right and the lyrics dont make sense but it works wonderfully.

me and my baby - this song makes you want to dance and the spine kills the vocals.

one way ticket - i love the feel of this song! the lyric “the conductor plays the bass, and the train it has a face” just. gives you that mood that this is all magical and cartoony and its just an adventure your having on a train.

the suspender man - one of my other favorite hero song. the lyrics can get strange at times but thats part of the charm. its so fun to sing along, especially in the fast parts. i love singing never 21 times.

steamboat shenanigans - i adore the lyrics. youre standing on a boat running on music and good feeling. the lyrics are silly and the vocals are wonderful. rabbit has a charming edged voice. uncle ralphie makes his appearance in a tuba

prelude to a dream - again, michaels charming voice strikes again. the way the lyrics are sung are eerie but strike you.

the ballad of lily - what is it with me and liking the segway songs more than the actual songs. the ballad of lily slowly builds into something greater as time goes on and i love the accordion.

make believe - another song i want to dance to, the chorus is so fun and great. this song is about being good.

honeybee - one of my favorite parts of this is how when the robots sing “bee” it reminds me of the subtle sounds of a bee buzzing. a sad song about love, maybe something we can relate to.

rex marksley - a wild wild west adventure following the greatest hero, rex wanders around doing good deeds for his life. a great beat and chorus, but it the verses that make it great.

scary world - i love the tentative way things are sung, spine and the gang are scared during this song, something is afoot. pretty sure the morse code says something serious and imaginative, and then ends with the word “bananimals”

thatll be the way home - another era song, you get the feel of the time period like a lot of the other songs on this album. thatll is a really fun word to sing repeatedly.

airheart - a story about a part airplane part woman who becomes a great pilot. a cute story with a great harmony.

little birdie - cute lyrics, the mood of the song is so strange and not how you would think.

mk3

go spine go - easily one of my favorite songs. a jazzy sort of song about the spine having diarrhea. poor spine gets harassed by his band mates

roller skate king - all time favorite hero song. rsk is just a fun guy who roller skates and wants other people to have fun. i cant help but to dance to this song and the chorus is super catchy.

wired wrong - a song that hits too far home. weve all felt wired wrong one way or another. the harmonies are so solemn but hit all the right emotions.

hatch fever - hatchworths debut song. hes still learning what its like to be one of the singing bots so hes still working out the kinks. fast and catchy, i love the abrupt breaks in the song.

fancy shoes - mysterious fancy shoes from a mouse find themselves on hatchys feet. i love the tangents and the footfall sounds at the beginning set the mood of the strange yet serious mood of the song.

steam powered giraffe - you can feel everyone getting ready to sing, i love how you hear about the robots being robots. i love the contrast between all the robots voices tied together with lovely lyrics and a fun beat.

ghost grinder - rabbit strikes again with a chilling song, but this song works the scary theme into a fun halloweeny song about a dancing event.

mecto amore - i love the sultry kind of beat this song has at the beginning. always in love with songs that remind you these singers are robots.

turn back the clock - i cried listening to this song like full on sobbing. rabbit has such a true performance of watching a little girl grow up in little to no time. the song is heart wrenching but worth a listen to understand a part of rabbits character. you can feel her emotions as she laments time.

please explain - silly lyrics that fit together nicely. a series of questioning things the robots dont understand. the spines verse is funny not because of the spine, but the other robots making razzberry sounds during it.

a way into your heart - a love letter to the fans. weve had hard times but the robots will be there for us to sing with and get a smile back on our face. a cute song, but the first few lyrics are sung awkwardly.

bleak horizon - i think its hilarious when the little kid is just like “...bye” a chilling song about the future. harmonies are on point

steam powered giraffe reprise - a cute idea that works really well on stage and kind of random on the cd. the robots have been reset and now sing in japanese. kind of stunted sounding japanese but the song is still catchy and lively.

ill rust with you - this song screams grease. super 70s and you pick up that feel immediately. you can practically imagine rabbit in the all the clothes she describes

she said maybe - another song boasting spines vocal range. kind of creepy.

vice quadrant

its cosmic - the chorus, god the chorus. the progression of notes leaves my ears wanting only more.

the speed of light - you can pinpoint just where the song takes its turn from innocent amazement to more sinister. all this power, you feel invincible. chilling, just like all the song about the astronaut. the build up is amazing.

progress and technology - i adore the spines sharpness of his voice. the robotic feel matches the theme of how the future has come so far. slightly ominous in its lyrics, you feel like something will go wrong with this utopia.

oh no - legit sobbed the first few times i listened to it. the soliton reprise kills me every time. the first word sung is actually my favorite, but i love the pacing of this song, especially at the beginning

daughter of space - the story lyrics that the spine continues to excel at. i love how the lyrics mimic the astronauts feelings towards the daughter of space.

on a crescendo - soft, homely, this song lets you live in the comfort of your time while describing how far humans have come. im so glad a song so chill made it into this album.

commander cosmo - im so glad dwight is ok. captures the emotions and the views of both commander and the public. an emotional roller coaster.

necrostar - rabbit kills it with the sexy deep, scary lyrics. necrostar cant help but to sound sultry as he describes how he is the one to destroy humanity

steamjunk - the perfect opener for winks arc. lost, but hopeful. i love the progression of the song and the chorus.

the pulls - ive never loved a waltz so much. morbid lyrics sung beautifully and calmly toward you. so strange that hatchworth sings low, but i wouldnt have it any other way

whale song - oh so, so cute. oh my gosh. so. cute. rabbit is just teeth rottingly adorable and im so glad we get to hear her take center stage on her accordion. i love the conversation of them just starting a song on the fly.

the vice does tight - harmonies! scary, and set the mood of the impending doom. i love how the lyrics flow and adore how the singers switch

where i left you - saddening, but in the longing sense. hatchworths voice is back to the countertenor were used to.

wink the satellite - hatchworth and wink are just too cute. i love the speaking parts.

fire fire - a lovely song, that is until you realize what its about. this guy just does not have good luck. loses a lot of the emotion of the live performance, but it works to separate the graphic scenes from the audience. back ups make the song. the pinao crawling up the scales gives me chills.

soliton - a love song in its core. love the build up to the chorus. i love when cosmic sings as well! because she loves the astronaut too.

burning in the stratosphere - short and sweet. i love the suspense and build of the countdown and the irony.

star valley night - i love the off key sort of singing for some reason. the up and downs are wrong in all the right ways. cute silly lyrics from all the bots.

starburner - a cute, up beat song. maybe wishing on stars isnt a good idea, but the conversations in this song make this song cute. more spine crying plz

starlight star shine - love that acoustic guitar, especially since so much of this album is synthesized and electronic. a charming love song.

the space giant - i love the conversations that take place in this song. the story progression and especially the part where their blasting off of earth are great.

over the moon - catchy and sweet. the chorus is my favorite part.

sky sharks - not really a fan of professor elemental, but i love the silliness of the song. strange things are happening but its so silly and presented silly. song gets dated with a 50 shades of grey reference.

hold me - sad, but lovely. the verses are cute.

gg the giraffe - cute lyrics! gg introduces herself and expects only gratitude for existing. gg voice is meant to be obnoxious however and makes the song a little hard to bear.

steam world heist (not including remakes of the songs)

what we need are some heroes - i fell in love with this song at first listen. such a depressed world, but hope is always on the horizon. im always a sucker for the spines voice. “forever and a day” always hits me hard for some reason. the chorus is so hopeful.

the red queen - grew on me. originally i was upset things payed into a red queen sense, but the sharp noises vocals and robotic laughing, well, that grows on a person. i loved all the staticy distorted noises.

the vast frontier - so chilling, hatchworth returns with his slightly morbid lyrics and wonderfully written music.

star scrap - another song i cant help but to sing with. a bit depressing, but fits the mood of the album. i love the ending

the stars - i love how space western this song is. back to the old roots, perhaps. again, im at the mercy of spines wonderful vocals. hatchworths verse is silly and cute and im not even mad it breaks the song up

prepare for boarding - i love the shifts in this song, they all work well to make the song interesting.

quintessential

only human - this song never fails to make me smile. hatchworth can sing and help me as much as he wants. sigh. he just wants things to be easier and better for us. i love the other robots interjections, but hatchworth is the real star of the show.

the ballad of delilah morreo - the rapid one right after the other beat of the lyrics and music make me love this song so much. the chorus is killer. “bat and beast and wolf and spider” always gets stuck in my head

overdrive - i love the echo that the band sings. everyone is so great in this song. hatchworth has the greatest lines but once the beat drops, oh boy. those harmonies. reminds you how robotic they are without being the same robotic they were in the first few albums. theyve been refined and fixed up. maybe not the biggest fan of the rap.

malfunction - this song can hit close to home. a different take on being wrong than something like wired wrong, but this one chooses to embrace those malfunctions. the chorus is lovely

photographic memories - maybe a bit slow at points, but sets up this new lover the spine seems to infatuated with. this isnt some fling, this is someone he wanted to spend his life with. the verses make the song, but the chorus doesnt holdout. the music in between verse keep you interested and the subtle changes keep you on your toes as the song shifts.

i dont have a name for it - such a charming, cute love song. i absolutely adore when the bots switch off singing words and parts of words. that up and down of their voices hits me just right.

sleep evil sleep - the lyrics are dreamy, but solidify in just the right moments. this song is about taking a break from the awfulness, just for one night.

blue portals - the chorus really keeps with you, another song where hatchworth just wants to do good, although this lets you see his more chaotic side.

salgexicon - honestly i still cant believe they made their dnd characters part of the spg lore. among hero songs, this one is pretty memorable, even if its cluttered with so many characters. the chorus gets stuck in your head, but the verses are what keep me interested. im glad salgexicon cries a lot but is still heroic.

leopold exeditus - i absolutely love the music that accompanies the song. the chorus is great and i love the divergence in the middle. “mozambique” is the best word ive ever heard get sung ever.

dream machine - a lovely closing piece, now that the evil sleeps, she can sleep and dream. seems almost like amsr during the verses.

love world of love - the beginning lyrics are my favorite, which make up for the repetitive chorus.

[tanyatakaishi]

Innocent Games: the rewrite

Without a world to save, petty drama and circumstances have forced a rift between the digidestined. That is until they find themselves in a world shaped solely by their memories, without their partners, where the only monsters to face are themselves. I’m doing it. I’m posting the rewrite. I put it on A03 and after a lot of thought I decided to delete all the old chapters on ff.net. I replaced them with the rewritten version and will be reposting the entire thing over the next few months. You can read it here. Or, you can read on tumblr below. I hope to gain some new readers and have some of my favorite peeps return. :)  Post 02, ignoring the epilogue, pretending tri don’t exist. Rated M for language, upcoming violence and sexual innuendo. Dub ‘cuz dub.

Innocent Games

I've seen worlds.

Before I knew that others existed, before I was torn from mine and forced to save another. Before the Digital World, I was sure they existed.

As a child, my mind teemed with magical places: a world where I could fly, another where I constantly wore a suit of armor (even in the tub) and got everywhere by riding a horse. In one, everything was blue. So blue that I couldn't tell the earth from the sky from the ocean from myself. But my favorite world was the one formed by fading memories: where my brother and I still shared a tiny room and I didn't do much but cry. I remember it in pieces: the legos spread across the floor, Matt's foot in my face when I snuck into his bed and turned in the night, the way we'd run to shut the door when our parents kissed, pretending like we hated it.

I sometimes wonder about the world Oikawa brought us to. If there were a way to get back there, if all those worlds could exist in a world like that.

I used to wonder if I was the only one who wondered.

Now that I'm here, I don't wonder at all.

....

Chapter One Black Hole

...

i need u

The words had been sitting mockingly on his phone for more than an hour, waiting for a response.  Matt frowned, finally left with nothing to do but answer. His college essay sat on his brother's desk, covered with comments in red pen (too poetic, too vague, this should be a semi-colon not a comma) all written in skewed pillars of scratchy scrawl. His eyes slipped sideways, across piles of books and crumpled paper to the disheveled bed. An arm slumped over TK's face, but his knees were pointing toward the ceiling and every now and then he had to readjust his feet to keep them there. Patamon had curled into a nest of blankets by his side, long furry ears masking his face. Matt turned back to his phone and hammered out a line with his fingers. Hanging with my brother tonight.

bring him with

Is your sister coming?

no excuses

Matt could think of a hundred. Nope

i thought blondes had more fun  ¬_¬

With a verbal groan, Matt's fingers found the bridge of his nose. Tai's name blurred across the screen of his mobile. He set the phone face down and fiddled with a box of cigarettes nestled in his pocket, fingertips dancing along the few that remained.

“Better leave them there,” TK mumbled into his mattress. “Mom's gonna flip when she finds out you're smoking.” He lifted his head and Patamon squirmed in his sleep. “Who are you texting?”

Matt pulled out a cigarette anyway, letting it linger against his lips. “Tai.”

“You're not going to light that in here...”

“I'm going outside.”

“Better brace yourself. An hour lecture. Minimum.” TK watched as Matt stood. “You didn't tell her about Sora yet, did you?”

The cigarette bent between Matt's teeth.

“Make that two hours,” said TK.

come on! Mimis back. i told her every1 would be there b a friend and act suprised

With a sigh, Matt closed the balcony door behind him. His phone went off again.

man up. u cant avoid Sora 4ever

I'm not Matt stopped typing and his thumb jabbed into the backspace button, erasing his words. He shoved the phone in his pocket and lit his cigarette.

…

your gonna come cuz im irresitable

Does your phone not have spell check?

its not smart

Sora bit back a smile and rolled her eyes.

“Are you sexting?”

Her whole face flushed. “Omigod, no. Mimi.”

Noodles flopped in front of Sora's nose when Mimi pointed a pair of chopsticks at her. “You look like you're playing coy. Is it Matt?” Mimi grinned and the yakisoba retreated, sliding behind her pink lips with a loud slurp.

“Playing coy?”

Mimi spoke with one cheek full. “Pretending you don't like the sexting.”

“I am not sexting.”

“You and Matt don't sext?”

Sora put her phone down. “No! What if someone read it?”

“Who doesn't enjoy some steamy literature once in a while?”

“My mother.”

“She doesn't like Matt?”

“She doesn't like sexting,” Sora hissed. She hid her face behind her hand when an old couple was seated in the booth beside them. “You did hear me when I said we broke up, right?”

“I'd rather live in denial.” Mimi pouted when Sora glared. “Whyyyy? You guys are so cute together.”

That was true, she guessed. Every picture of them was gorgeous. Matt was perpetually handsome, even when he was at his worst. Did he have a worst, really? His frown practically oozed sex. That definitely wasn't his worst: the brooding crease by his cheekbones and narrowed frosty gaze. His smile certainly wasn't. It was bright and charming, even when he was all awkward and embarrassed and his cheeks burst into rosy splotches.

Sora closed her eyes when her phone chimed with a new message. “I don't know,” she said. “Maybe that's why.”

“Because you guys are cute...?”

“Because we...” A piece of chicken was speared through by her chopstick. “Because we're perfect together.” Sora concentrated on wrapping a single noodle around it. She swore she could hear Mimi's jaw drop.

“Well, that's stupid.”

Sora looked up and found Mimi's mouth had puckered, like she tasted something sour. Her eyes narrowed and Sora's narrowed right back. “Thanks.”

“Explain.”

Sora groaned. “It feels like we're always trying too hard. We never fight.” She sighed when Mimi raised her brows. “I mean about us. Our relationship. Shouldn't we fight about us sometimes?”

“You broke up with Matt because you guys don't fight about your relationship?”

“You're making it sound stupid.”

“I'm just repeating what you said.”

Sora flicked a straw wrapper at her and it barely fluttered. “I tried once. To fight with him. About the band. I acted like I was jealous of it, even though I wasn't.” She laughed and Mimi took another big bite of yakisoba. “He just looked at me, you know, like he was trying to get me and then he asked if he should quit.”

“Seriously?”

“Dead serious. He wasn't even mad. He said it didn't matter. Like music didn't matter more than me.”

“That's really sweet.”

“It's not. It's uncomfortable.” Sora poked at her food and everything seemed to rush out of her in one breath. “I'm always uncomfortable. When its just us, I get... he makes me nervous – my stomach hurts, sometimes I can't even breathe.”

“Sounds like a crush.”

“It's exactly like a crush.” Sora frowned. “For four years.”

Mimi swallowed another bite of noodles and stared at her, hard. “You broke up with Matt because you've had a crush on him for four years.”

“I just want to be friends again. I want to sit in a room with him while he plays guitar and not feel like I have to sing his praises. I want to work on a sketch without him telling me how beautiful it is. I want him to forget our anniversary. I want him to do something wrong.” Sora's eyes sunk to her uneaten meal and found a notification on her phone.

“You want someone less perfect.”

Nodding, Sora checked her messages. “I guess.”

sora you dissapoint me. i left u the perfect opening and u blew it. so u coming 2 the party or what?

“Do you want to go to this party Tai's bugging me about?” Sora asked.

Mimi beamed. “Who do you think convinced him to go?”

….

emergency meeting

“I call bullshit,” Davis grumbled.

The pew pew pew of the arcade shooter quieted when Yolei stopped her relentless button mashing to raise a brow at him. It shot up like a question mark beneath her lenses, glaring with the countless lights of electronics. “What?”

Leaning against the side of an old pinball machine, Davis lifted his phone so she could see the text on his screen.

Ken took out another couple zombies before racking up his arcade gun. Davis huffed when Ken's name outranked his in the high scores.

Pushing hair behind his ear, Ken pulled his cell from his back pocket. “I have the same text.”

Yolei hung up the gun she'd still been holding and grinned devilishly when her name climbed to the top of the screen. She flipped open her phone. “He sent it to all of us.

“It's bullshit,” Davis spat. “Guaranteed. Mimi's in town, scheming. She probably stole his phone.”

“It does say emergency,” said Ken.

“Wait. No, Davis is right. I think he's bluffing.” She pulled a crumpled piece of paper from her purse and attempted to smooth it. “Apparently Tai's class is lacking in graphic designers. I think someone did this in Paint. God awful.”

She held up a flyer covered in ridiculously drawn confetti and written entirely in Comic Sans. “The seniors are throwing a graduation party.”

Ken looked at his phone again. “Why would Tai invite underclassmen?”

“Because it's Tai,” said Yolei. “He likes attention.”

Davis frowned. “He's going to beat me up.”

“Oh please, he messaged all of us.”

“I'm not going,” said Davis. Bullshit, he typed.

u got me emergency party

And then a second later, dont worry, im not gonna beat u up

Davis leaned forward, peering suspiciously around the corner to find a bunch of elementary kids gathered around the latest version of DDR. No Tai. He held up a finger when Yolei tried to talk to him. Thanks, he wrote. It took him a while to hammer out the next line. Kari gonna be there? I need to talk to her.

maybe not

“What is that supposed to mean?” asked Yolei.

Davis flinched and shrugged his shoulder into her chin, nudging her away. “Stop reading my texts.”

“You were about to show it to me anyway.”

True, but he wasn't about to admit it.  “Mind your own business.”

“Please, your business is everyone's business.”

“No it's not.” Davis looked to Ken for back up and was let down by a shrug. “Shut up.”

“I didn't say anything,” said Ken.

Davis huffed and showed Ken his phone. “What is this supposed to mean?”

“I think he's being purposefully elusive.”

“So that I come? Or I don't? Maybe he forgot to leave me out of the message.”

“I doubt that,” said Ken.

“He knows it takes two to tango,” said Yolei.

“There was no tango-ing,” Davis snapped, trying not to sound disappointed. “We had a moment.”

“With your tongues. While she was dating TK.”

Davis reached into his hair to fiddle with his goggles before he remembered they were missing. He could still picture them, nestled in Kari's hair. He crossed his arms. “I know, I know. I'm an asshole.”

“You just weren't thinking,” said Ken.  If it had come from someone else, Davis would've taken it as an insult, but Ken did this thing with his voice that was eerily soothing.

“Was that Kari's excuse?” Yolei's eyes went all squinty, the same way they did whenever she took off her glasses. Davis sorta wanted to steal them so she always looked that stupid.

“It was a moment,” he repeated.

She was already ignoring him, fingernails clicking against buttons as she hammered out her own texts at breakneck speed.

Davis pouted at Ken and returned to Tai's message. It must have taken him a good five minutes to write back, because Ken was already winning against the next round of computer zombies.  Tell her to come. I'll be good. You can even chaperone us.

His phone gave a pleasant chirp in return.

as if u had a choice

Davis started to respond when Yolei's voice squealed, “Oh! We're doing makeovers at Sora's!”

“We?” he asked.

“For the party. With Mimi. The girls,” Yolei said. Before Davis could open his mouth again, she looked up from her phone to glare at him. “Kari's not coming.”

He frowned. “Crap.”

Ken gave him a small smile. “Whack-a-mole?”

“How'd ya guess?”

…

emergency meeting

Green eyes scanned the words through thin metal bars. Ripping off his glove, Cody typed a quick reply. Where?

His fingers tapped impatiently on the end of a shinai while he waited for a response. “Sorry, sensei.”

Removing his helmet, Chikara Hida gave a wave of dismissal and kicked back a swig of prune juice. His white beard came back glistening around a smile, wrinkles kissing the corners of his cheeks. “How is the Digital World these days?”

“Peaceful.” Cody pulled off his own helmet and pushed strands of damp hair from his eyes. He looked over his shoulder to where Upamon was happily playing with his own mini shinai, his oversized ears swinging it around with strange precision. Cody's attention turned back to his phone and it felt suddenly heavy in his hand. “It's been a long time since we've had a meeting.”

“We haven't seen anyone since I've been back,” complained Upamon, suddenly dropping his weapon. He bounced across the dojo floor and flew into Cody's back, forcing him forward. “Are we having a meeting?”

“Sounds like it.” His phone chimed and he peered down at the new message.

Bullshit, it said. A tiny avatar bursting with burgundy hair appeared beside it. Davis was grinning behind his goggles and shooting up what he must have thought was some sort of American gang sign.

Cody squinted at his phone, watching as Tai and Davis messaged back and forth.

“Is everything all right?” his grandfather asked.

“False alarm,” Cody answered flatly. He gave Upamon's head an affectionate pat and typed out a quick message of his own.

Davis, you're in a group text.

His phone chimed again.

Fuck

…

Ba-ding.

Ba-ding. Ba-ding.

Ba-ding.

The phone slid under a pillow and a body slid under the sheets, further and further until it was just a ball at the foot of the bed. It gave a pitiful moan. “Please stop.”

A door creaked open. “You could turn it off.”

The lump shook, a pathetic vibrating that only ended when the smoothly tucked corners of the the comforter were yanked out from under the mattress, uncovering it.

Susumu Kamiya sat on the bed and gave his daughter's hair a rub. Chestnut strands stuck in every direction, clinging to the sheets.

Kari pulled the covers back over her head. “I messed everything up,” she moaned, wiping damp cheeks into her mattress. “Even Tai's mad at me.”

“He's not mad at you, honey. He's just brothering.” Susumu laughed, just a little snort of appreciation at his own humor. “You know, like mothering, but he's your broth—”

“Got it, Dad,” Kari moaned.

“Anyway, you didn't mess everything up. You're in high school, Kari. This isn't time for a serious relationship anyway.”

“You mean any relationship.”

“That's my girl.”

Ba-ding.

Susumu's hand reached and slipped under her pillow. He started scrolling through her messages.

Kari peeked from under the covers. “Dad!”

“You don't want to read that. Or that.” He stretched his arm away from her grabbing hand. “Protecting my daughter's virtue is my dadly duty. Please.”

Kari found her nose smushed under his palm. “Stop looking at my—”

“Definitely not that. Wow. I'm gonna have a talk with his mother about that language. Oh here.” Susumu released her face and handed her the phone. A row of texts had appeared, all accompanied by a grinning picture of Mimi Tachikawa, who (courtesy some good trick photography) seemed to be sporting Lady Liberty's crown.

“You should go have fun with the girls,” Susumu said. “Get out of the house.”

Kari looked up from her phone and frowned. “Stop fathering me.”

“Too late.” He patted her knee with a boyish grin. “Did that a long time ago.”

….

im here. ur mom made dinner. its delish

“Mmmmm, Mrs. Izumi,” Tai mumbled through a mouthful of dumplings, “dese are amadin'.” He grabbed another between his fingers and offered it to Joe, who sat awkwardly beside him, knees knocking into the Izumi's coffee table.

Joe peered over his glasses at the food, moist in Tai's palm. “Let's leave some for Izzy.”

Shrugging, Tai popped it in to join the others. The bedroom door opened.

“Iddy!” Tai swallowed. “Can I have your mom?”

Izzy's eyes, dark and lined with heavy shadows, flickered to the kitchen where his mother was putting together another plate. His attention turned back to Tai who seemed to be waiting for a serious answer. “No.”

“I have some fresh bok choy and garlic,” Mrs. Izumi said, carrying a tray into the living room. The smell preceded her and Tai's mouth started to water.

“Trade?”

Izzy ignored him and turned his attention to Joe. “I'm going to make an educated guess and conclude the emergency's a farce.”

“This is why I don't add you to group texts,” Tai grumbled. “You ruin all the fun.”

Mrs. Izumi set the bok choy on the table and Tai quickly snatched some up with his chopsticks, thanking her through a loud slurp. “Would you boys like anything to drink?” she asked.

“Could I take my dinner in my room?”

“Oh, well, of course, Izzy, but,” Mrs. Izumi seemed to hesitate, her hands wringing together, “don't you want to take a break?”

“I want to show them what I've been working on,” he said, rubbing a tired eye. “I'll go to bed after that.”

“No way, emergency meeting, Izzy.”

Izzy set his eyebrows until they looked like a big bushy V and Tai grimaced.

“Is everything all right?”

“Everything's fine, Mom. Don't worry.”

“Okay, I'll just put this all on a tray for you. Tai, Joe, are you staying for—”

“No,” Izzy said. “They have a party to go to.” He pulled open his door, motioning for them to step inside.

“Aw man,” Tai moaned, slumping into Izzy's office chair. His neck craned backwards, making it seem as if his large mop of hair was weighing him down. “Killjoy, that's what you are. I coulda boxed that up and taken it home for later. Do you know how hard it is to get a good meal at my house?”

Izzy pushed the chair so that it rolled away from his desk, Tai flopping with it. An array of screens were running in black and white, with code so tiny that Tai had squint his eyes to make out any of it.

“So what's got you too busy to make it to my graduation party? This is like a once in a lifetime opportunity, Izzy.”

“No one went to mine,” interjected Joe, stretching his legs as he sat on Izzy's bed. “Including me.”

“Wrong.” Tai snapped his fingers. “I went to yours.”

Izzy tapped a couple of lines into the screen, his dark eyes running back and forth to double check his work. He looked haggard. His red hair was long again, sticking out in every direction in greasy clumps. Tai was about to ask when he'd last thought to take a shower when he spoke up.

“I'm replicating the data that existed in the world MaloMyotismon brought Davis's team into.”

Tai sat up straight and used his feet to roll the chair forward. His eyes danced over the screens. “You mean Whoop-ass Wishing World?”

“That's what you named it?” Joe asked.

Tai gave a shrug. “Davis did. Made sense.”

“WWW.” Izzy's top lip curled with a hint of amusement, fingers still flying across the keys. “Because of it's connection to the Digital World, I've actually managed to extract a quantitative code that could potentially give us the power to create tangible spaces with the images in our brains: memories, dreams...”

Joe gave a heavy swallow. “You're kidding.”

“Not at all,” groaned a voice beside his rear.

Joe jumped, literally taking off across the room with a hand clutched over his breast when Tentomon appeared from under the covers.

“He's been working on it all night,” Tentomon moaned, green digital eyes flickering sleepily. “And all day. And the night before that and the night before that...”

“So what you're saying is”—Tai gave a big grin and rolled up, bumping the back of the chair into Izzy's legs—“he needs a break. A party perhaps?”

Izzy was already shaking his head. “I'm not going, Tai. Do you have any idea what a breakthrough like this could mean? We can dream up”—he started to look a bit manic— “endless possibilities. This could mean a world of unlimited resources... we can literally create an entire world of unlimited resources.”

“You must have weird dreams.”

“He has no time for dreams,” yawned Tentomon. “Never sleeps.”

“Izzy, Izzy, Izzy,” Tai tsked. He stood and threw an arm around his shoulders. “You gotta know when to quit. This isn't healthy, is it, Joe?”

Joe was already busy picking up an assortment of empty tea bottles from the floor. “I hope you're drinking water.”

Izzy lifted his shadow-rimmed eyes to Tai's, squinting. “Breakthrough.”

“Is this why you missed my soccer game Friday?” Tai pouted when Izzy gave a shrug. “You wound me.”

A knock disturbed them and Mrs. Izumi slowly opened the door with a tray of food in her arms. There was enough for all of them even though they weren't staying. “It's so nice to see you boys,” she said when Izzy quickly turned back to his screen. “It's been too long.”

Tai deflated. “College applications, ugh.”

In truth, they were only half the problem. It had been more than six months since he had attempted to get the group together.  The older they got, the more complicated everything seemed to get. School was a given, relationships were just, ugh, drama... heck, even soccer was crazy. A quarter of the team was stressing over college scouts. Tai was over it. He hated complicated – the stress, everything--it was easier to avoid it.

“Just wait until you're in college,” groaned Joe. “I don't even know why I'm here.”

“Easy.” Tai grinned. “Me.”

Mrs. Izumi smiled. “I can't believe how much you've all grown.” She set the tray down and the fingers on her hand twitched, just behind her son's red hair. It lowered suddenly when Izzy began to plug in another line of a code and Tai noticed the way her smile stretched when her eyes filled with tears.

Joe must have noticed too, because he started fumbling with his armful of empty bottles and excused himself, bolting out of the room to throw them into the recycling bin.

Izzy immediately stopped typing and turned to her. “I can't speak for Tai, but I'd deduce my growth has a lot to do with your incredible cooking.” He rubbed one tired eye and forced a grateful smile.

“Please speak for me,” Tai said, swiping yet another dumpling. He internally breathed a sigh of relief when Mrs. Izumi's face lit up, tears shining.

“I really appreciate it,” Izzy continued. Pink welled into his cheeks when she kept smiling. “Thanks, Mom.”

Her voice came out sweet and strangled. “You're welcome, sweetheart. You boys let me know if there is anything else I can get you.” The door closed after Tai caught her wiping her eyes.

He turned to Izzy. There was a brief moment unspoken between them, a concern Tai wasn't sure how to voice: What's going on? Why is your mom crying? Are you okay?

Izzy turned back to his screen and Tentomon buzzed into the side of his leg, a not so subtle nudge. He leaned down to grab a dumpling from his partner's outstretched claw.

“I'll call you when I've reached a stopping point,” Izzy said before taking a bite. His mouse clicked once, twice, and then he reached backwards without looking and rolled the office chair back in front of the desk. He took a seat and clicked again.

“Okay, I get it.” Tai shoveled a mound of food into his palm for the road. “You're on a roll. Breakthrough. Yeah, call me when you decide to be cool again.”

“A breakthrough that could theoretically save the world.”

“Meh. Already did that. Literally.” Tai put one last dumpling on his pile. “You make sure he gets a shower later, eh Tentomon?”

Izzy frowned while Tentomon gave an obedient salute.

Tai's fingers danced by his head in a weak imitation of Medusa's snakes. “Your hair, Izzy, geez. Shower! Water, food... life!” He tore into the dough with his teeth and spoke through a mouthful of pork. “You know Mimi's gonna be there, right?”

There was another light flush in Izzy's cheeks and Tai felt triumphant.

“Tell her I said hello,” Izzy mumbled before taking his own bite of food. “How long is she in town?”

“A week, I think.” Tai gave a shrug and headed for the door. “Life,” he hissed, backing out of the room. “La-iiife.” He could have sworn he saw Izzy start to laugh, just the slightest shake of his shoulders.

Joe almost ran into his back. “Where are you going?”

Tai popped another piece of food into his mouth. “To da pardy.”

“What, that's it? You aren't going to drag him out by the collar and call him a pansy?”

“Nope.”

Joe glared through his lenses. “Yet it's perfectly acceptable to do to me?”

“Can't do it to Izzy.” Tai slapped him between the shoulders of his collared shirt, hard. “He's got a backbone.”

…

The screen had gone blurry long before he finally quit. Izzy's face lowered onto the keyboard, crushing keys. Blank lines entered beneath the cursor until there was nothing left but black. It took a minute before he realized he'd fallen asleep.

Izzy peeled his sticky cheek from the back of his hand and robotically erased the lines until he was back to a screen full of code. He rubbed his eyes but the numbers wouldn't focus. Yawning, he saved his work and rolled his chair backwards.

“Shower,” he mumbled, still hearing Tai's voice chiming cheerfully in his ear.

It had been a long time since Tai had been by.

Maybe it just felt long. Time didn't pass normally when he was working. Obsessing, Tentomon would say worriedly from his usual position on his bed. The digimon spent the rest of his time in the kitchen with his mom, worrying. Izzy cast a look over his shoulder as he trudged tiredly to the hall, catching the digimon snoring beneath the covers. Guilt crawled into his belly and he slowly closed the door behind him.

Izzy tried to shake it off. It would be over soon. The program was complete. It was riddled with bugs, a million different glitches that he couldn't seem to figure out, but the essence was there. The power to create, just waiting for his fingertips.

Turning on the water seemed mundane, infinitesimal in comparison to everything he could be doing. Necessary only because he was, unfortunately, still very human.

Izzy stared at himself in the mirror, his red hair was greasy and wild from endless frustrated tugs and long enough that it looked a miniature version of Tai's gravity defying mane. He attempted to smooth it and it stuck to his scalp in kinky waves. He gave himself a small sniff and his nose crinkled with disgust.

Sighing, he stripped and stepped into the shower. Code danced across his closed eyes, burnt permanently into his retinas, while the screen in his room slowly ate it away.

Inside his computer, the numbers collapsed. Code slipped from all sides of the monitor, funneling to the center of the screen. The whole room flashed, a distortion of a pixels, just a glimpse into the world beyond. Then everything went silent.

Months of work lost and in its wake, a black hole, just waiting for something else to come close.