#sooooooo...scrapped

[pup-pee]

STRAWBERRY MARMALADE ((ストロベリィマァマレィド))

[wildsaltair]

with all due respect my hands were not made for staying off that man

[heartbeetz]

I used to be very self-conscious eating in public just bc I didn't want people looking at me but one day a while back I went "actually there's people out there who'd think it's hot as fuuuuuuck when I eat a big sloppy burger 👍" and that fixed me completely almost instantly. Everybody wants me I'm the most fuckable man in any restaurant. That being said... canonical "stereotypical usamerican man's man who likes beer and cheeseburgers" Michael? We are holding hands. Baby I will drink beer and eat cheeseburgers with you whenever you want just say the fucking word ♡

[bruiselikeviolets]

just finished rw&rb movie

[ashtwinproject22]

I have a tank top from when I was still in like middle school and it's gotten suddenly full of little holes and I keep thinking well maybe it's finally reaching the end of its lifespan but I hate throwing things away that I can still use so I'm wondering if I should try to mend it or if the holes appearing everywhere (not just along seams but anywhere) mean that the cloth has gotten so thin and old that it would just be a waste

[cannibalisticskittles]

honestly that just solidifies my feeling that lucia is drawn towards the sabbat in most universes

as someone with a respect that borders on reverence for death and decay, the idea that her body is going to be perpetually unaging after she gets bitten, that she has been denied her right to change and rot and feed the earth, is anathema to her. her own personal hell. realizing the potential for body mods that has also now been lost to her is enraging. she can't even cut her goddamned hair without it growing back while she sleeps in her coffin.

unless something happens to change her mind, i think she would eventually seek out the sabbat in an attempt to convince a tzimisce fleshcrafter to use her body as a canvas and just go fucking nuts with it because she cannot bear the idea of staying the same forever. she'd love to live through the experience and seek it out again, but if she doesn't, oh well. a worthy cause and a worthy death.

[xoxoaugust]

See You Again

In which: Sae Itoshi knew what he wanted from the beginning. He wanted to be a professional soccer player, and to play alongside those who weren't a waste of time (well according to him). Unbeknownst to Sae, a little birdie told him that you, a childhood friend of his, would be in Spain for the next three years. He didn't think he'd ever see you again, especially not after your, not so peaceful falling-out. But who knows what might happen when he comes face to face with you again? (2.0k wc)

an: This is 4 years after the start of the first selection, so Sae is around 22 years old. In this timeline, Sae and Rin have made up (because I said so) and he has returned to Spain to continue playing. I put this with the U-20 team because the only other person I know of that was on the Spainish team is Luna, sooooooo idk idk. Reader is fem, and is a university student in film studies. Enjoyyyy!(might make multiple parts)

His POV

January 1st, 2022

The New Year, god he hated the New Year. What is so special about a new year? It's just another 365 days to spend, what is so different that you must celebrate so loudly. Sae was just a little bit grumpy that all he could hear was loud music, drunkenly cheers, and laughter all night long.

Sae was meticulous about his night routine, he would work out, shower, brush his teeth, wash his face, set his hair, put on his sleep mask and then pass out. Unfortunately for his teammates, he couldn't sleep properly that night, so now everyone must suffer. Luckily, practices were called off for the week, for new years, and weather reasons.

'no practice' is not a thing to Sae, even if they were called off, he would still be at that field. So there he was 6:00 AM on January 1st, practicing alone. He didn't mind being alone, he was more than used to it. But sometimes, even just for a split second, he forgets that there was a time where he wasn't truly lonely. That split second eats at his mind like that plague, he hated how vulnerable it made him feel, so he would act like it never happen.

January 5th, 2022

When he wasn't at the field practicing or at home watching clips, he would be found at the little family cafe down a couple blocks from his penthouse. He would go there after an early morning jog, and order the same thing. An unsweetened iced matcha with a yogurt fruit bowl, he liked it because it didn't fill him up too much before a practice.

That morning at practice in locker rooms, he overheard something...interesting. He couldn't give a crap about anything Aiku had to say, but this was the only time he was truly listening.

"A close friend of mine is coming back for some time, she hasn't told me how long she's going to stay, but she's studying here."

Out of curiosity, Sendou asks,

"What's her name? Is she hot?"

"Why is that the first thing you think of? She's pretty but thats so weird to say. Her name is [y/n]."

"Well my bad! Its not like i'm going to try, I'm going to date a hot actress."

The groans let out in that room echoed from wall to wall, but Sae on the other hand broke character. Sae is know for his neutral, cold demeanor, but hearing your name clashed against the chink in his armor, and was enough for the walls to come crashing down.

November 27th, 2017

His POV

God, what a drag. Why was Rin so damn persistent on that dream, it wasn't even realistic.

Sae had just won the goal against Rin, and sealed the deal of scrapping that old dream. He had to say, he didn't enjoy saying this to his brother, but if no one was going to be honest with him, who was?

He knew his brother would be at that field, but he didn't know that you would be there.

He turned to look at you, standing there with a shocked expression and teary eyes. He couldn't stand it, why were you looking at him like that? Like he was evil, or something.

You walked closer to the brothers. Sae thought you would walk to him and say something. Maybe a 'Welcome back!' or something that matched your usually cheerful personality. But no, you walked right over to Rin, and helped him up off the ground.

Rin saw you like an older sister, you basically were. You always made sure he took care of himself, even before Sae left. He had immense respect for you, he considered you his best friend.

Rin stared down at you with a heartbreaking expression, tears flowed down his face as he avoided making eye contact with you for too long, he thought it might spare some of his dignity.

Your POV

At first you were shocked, how could Sae do this? Easy answer, this wasn't your Sae.

Your Sae would rather die than ever hurt his little brother, he would never intentionally hurt him. Your Sae would give his younger brother the last popsicle, he would bandage his wounds, he would play with him, protect him from anything or anyone that even tried to harm his precious brother. They were like peas in a pod.

You would know, you and Sae had practically raised Rin. You would pack him and Sae food to eat after playing because they would always forget, and they would always get hangry. They would stop by your house right next door and take you to their games, to get popsicles. You saw how kind Sae truly was, Rin brought out the best in him.

But now, he's changed.

Now you felt anger, unadulterated rage.

You didn't hesitate. Not even a little bit.

You shot a glare at him before marching up to him.

You slapped the everliving shit out of him.

You left a red mark on his face, the hands he used to hold had now hurt him.

The two of you never dated, but you acted like a couple. Just two kids holding hands on the park benches eating snacks, stolen glances and warm cheeks.

Sae was your first love, and you were his first love.

No, scratch that. You taught him love.

He stood there, like a kicked puppy holding his cheek. No expression, just a frown tattooed on his pretty face, the same on he walked in with.

You never yelled at him, until today.

"Sae Itoshi, I don't know what happened to you in Spain, and honestly I don't care right now, but you cannot treat Rin this way!

I don't know who you think you are, maybe that 'Japan's Treasure' title finally got to you, but the audacity is appalling!

You come back after FOUR WHOLE YEARS, you didn't contact Rin or I for three years out of the four.

and the first FUCKING thing you say is say is this lame, no PATHETIC EXCUSE OF A HELLO?

no, you don't get to treat either of us this way, some treasure you are."

That got his attention.

"What did you want me to do? Let him live on with some childish dream? He won't get anywhere dreaming like a toddler. I was busy building my career, not that you would know anything about that."

If you weren't angry before, you were SCATHING now.

You took a breath in, and out.

You wanted to scream, but you knew it would be a lost cause.

"When did you get so cruel?"

...

Thats where the memory ended before Aiku's loud voice snapped him out of his daze. His mind clouded by the vision of her teary eyes.

It couldn't be you right? There could always be another person with the same name, there's no way you could ever be friends with Oliver Aiku.

*incoming call from [name]*

Oliver picked up his phone and answered your call.

"Hey what's up?"

"I'm at the airport right now, can you drop me to my apartment building?"

"I am nothing but a servant to you huh?"

"So dramatic, i'll just take an uber you lazy ass"

Oliver laughs before saying

"No i'm done with practice i'm on my way"

Now he was sure, it was you. He would never forget that voice. The voice that he would wait to hear every night over the phone when he first went to Spain. The voice that brought him comfort when he was homesick. And the same voice that flooded him with guilt for the last 5 years.

a week later ----------------------------------------------------------------

He jogs to his little cafe down the street, same time as usual. He walks in, slightly sweaty.

As he approached the counter, he froze.

"Can I have one sweetened iced matcha and one avocado toast? Thanks!" You smiled as you swiped the card and clicked the 20% tip option before turning around to find a nice table.

When you turned around, you made eye contact with Sae.

It was as if time stood still, or rather time spun backwards.  

You hated this, you hated how you turned into that lovesick little girl in his presence, even after five whole years.  

You broke eye contact. You weren’t going to let him ruin your breakfast or ruin your stay in Spain. You walked past him to the nice table next to the window.  

He walked up to the register and order his usual. He tends to forget that he grew to love matcha because of you, yet another reminder of you.  

He grabs his food and sits at the table right next to you.  

“You just can’t leave me alone, can you?” You said sharply. 

“You’re sitting at the table I usually sit at; this was the next best seat.” 

“Still an ass I see” you laughed bitterly. 

You sipped on your matcha as you typed away on your laptop, being an exchange student was no joke. You felt Sae’s eyes on your screen.  

“What are you studying here?” Sae asked. 

You sighed, loudly.  

“I’m here for my bachelor’s degree, in film studies.” 

“You still want to be an actor? Wow, you haven’t changed.” 

You turned to him and glared. 

“No, I'm studying to be a director.”  

He turned his head to look at you.

"You always talked about how much you wanted to be an actress, what changed?"

You scoffed, how dense can one man be?

"Well people change, you're walking proof."

He sighed, he and Rin had made up years ago, why were you still upset?

"You know Rin and I made up right?"

You stopped typing.

"I know." You said softly.

In all honesty, you didn't know why you were still angry, it was probably bitterness because he didn't reach out in those five years to say anything, but then again you didn't expect him to anyways.

In your mind you felt bad, you shouldn't hold a grudge, especially not for this long, but you'd never admit that out loud.

"How have you been? It's been a while." You said, in effort to reciprocate the conversation.

"Not too bad, what about you?"

"I'd be good if my professor wouldn't assign more than he can grade, but aside from that i'm good."

You smiled awkwardly before turning back to your laptop to type. Sae felt relief, he's never felt this tense about anything.

"How is Rin? Did you see him before coming here?" he asked.

You felt a smile creep up to your lips, you knew he loved his brother.

"I did, he's doing great, he's playing in pro leagues now, watch out though, he might kick your ass."

He almost laughed, you're still the funny and loving girl you've always been. You sat in comfortable silence for the remaining time, but as you got up to leave and say goodbye, he stops you. He writes something down on a notecard that slipped out of your bag.

"Is this your number?"

"Yes, I got a new one back when I got a new phone. Call me if you need anything."

You smiled.

"I will, i'll see you around." You waved at him before walking out of the cafe.

You had only just left, but Sae hopes that you'll call soon.

As he jogs back to his penthouse, he feels his phone vibrate.

Today 7:13 AM

Is this Sae? It's {name}

Yes this is Sae.

jeez you text like an old man

Using grammar is being like an old man?

yes

Now I see how you and Aiku are friends.

thats so mean :(

whatever

Oliver told me to come to one of your practices so you might see me there

Okay, see you then.

He felt his chest bubble when he heard you call Aiku by his first name. But, at least he knew when he'd see you again.

xoxo, august

(pt 2 upon request)

[hopefulidiocy]

In the Rain

modern!aemondxfem!reader

warnings: cheating & heartbreak

inspiration: please listen to “in the rain” by XG whilst reading as this was the inspiration for this piece🤍

authors’ note: umm so I’m f*cking back!?!? uni has really kicked me to the kerb sooooooo i’m back and with heartbreaking stories ig

🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️

🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️🌧️

Being eighteen came with a bout of pain and silent suffering. The death of a teenager, officially a young adult and death of innocence, naivety, anything really. Suddenly, the onset of big adult emotions pour over you the second you blew out your candles. Your mother and father clapping frantically, your family surrounding you as if you had one spotlight over you; like a cabaret performer as the candle smoke waved in front of you, towards the ceiling and disappeared. Your best friends, Helaena and Alys stood beside you, hugging you and kissing your cheeks as if it was such a huge success to hit eighteen years old. You had heard stories of girls suddenly becoming whole, accepted once they turned eighteen; but not you. No. You felt an immense amount of pressure weigh you down as you looked into the eyes of your expectant father and into the body language of your strong willed mother. The world wasn’t your oyster. You knew what was expected of you and that was to take over the family business, which consisted of bossing people around to do the dirty work whilst you stayed home with your hands clean and an empty conscience. You never understood how your parents did it, they always had such a calming aura surrounding them that you had thought, many times, they didn’t feel anything.

A vibration from your back pocket had alerted you out of your mind fog. Whilst the attendees were helping themselves to cake, you fished out your phone, grazing the cracked screen with the pad of your thumb as the light shined.

A: happy birthday, y/n.

Inwardly, you groaned. Seeing his name freaked you out, a message you had been waiting for, for months now. A message to prove he was still thinking about you, to prove he still wanted you. And there it was. Yet your thumbs hovered over the keypad, wondering whether it was worth answering. You hadn’t gotten over your first love, Aemond Targaryen, he was everything to you and probably still. He held you in your darkest days, smiled with you on the lightest and laughed with you whenever you commanded it. You had gravitated towards him at school, that broody, tall man who swanned through the campus like he owned it. People moved out of the way for him, stared at him as if he was a god and it had intrigued you. With your mothers own willpower, you pretended you had no clue on the science homework and, thankfully, you had been paired together for some chemistry experiment and there you had laid the first seed into talking to him. You could be sneaky.

“What’s this?” You held up a cylinder containing a scrap of silver, he cocked his eyebrow at you,

“Magnesium.” He said, his lips thin as he wrote down some of his findings. He was hard to speak to, often alone and deep into his own thoughts. You were a determined little thing though.

“What’s this used for?” You had questioned, leaning your elbows on the table, looking at him expectantly. You hadn’t earned a single glance, nothing when he answered and even now, you hadn’t a clue what he said because he was just so damn ethereal up close.

It started from there. Little seeds of misunderstanding in order to get close to him and many people had told you that Aemond will not do anything for others, even if they were dying. But you turned out to be different. He answered you every time you asked a question with ease and patience that had only intrigued you.

“Are you always so serious?” You asked, finishing up on an answer,

“What makes you ask me that?” He whispered, his hand working hard on his paper,

“I’ve never seen you smile,” you said, setting your pen on the side of your text book,

“I always smile,” he deadpanned,

“Show me,” you cocked your head so your hair fell gracefully over your shoulder. He made a noise in his throat as he straightened up, looking at you through his own blue eye. He was vaguely amused.

“Show you?” He cocked an eyebrow,

“Yes,” that had earned a smile, only slight but his lips definitely tugged upwards which only made your jaw drop because that singular, tiny moment had changed his entire face. He was stunning when he looked happy. Something you hadn’t ever seen before.

After that, you began to talk more, to understand him and he listened when you spoke. Every time he would zone in on you, watch your mouth and understand everything you were saying. The time it all changed was during break when it was a particularly hot day, you were sprawled out on the grass in the school field, he was sat up, his knee tucked to his chest as he played with blades of grass.

“Your sister is sweet,” you commented after a moment of comfortable silence, shielding your eyes from the sunlight,

“She is,” he hummed, his back turned to you,

“What are you doing?” You smirked, propping up on your elbows, attempting to peer over his tall frame,

“None of your business,” he pretended to snap, but you could tell the amusement that was in his voice. After a few pauses, he turned around abruptly, pretending braided blades of grass made into a small bracelet. You stunned at him, looking from the green to his angelic face.

“What’s this?” You asked, slightly breathless,

“For you, y/n,” he beckoned the bracelet towards you but you made no move to pick it up, still stunned that he suddenly presented something so small but meaningful to you, “may I?” He gestured to your small wrist. You nodded, silently, his soft fingers gently held onto your wrist as he easily slipped it on. His fingers stilled at your velvety flesh, his eye flicking up to your face to gage your reaction.

“Wow, I’ve made you speechless?” He laughed, beautiful sound echoing through the grass, the wind carrying his magical tone as you looked into his face, a smile carved into his face. A strand of hair flew into his eye at that moment and instinctively you held your fingers to his forehead and moved it, tucking it behind his ear, he leaned into your touch, a pleasant smile on his face.

“Thank you,” you whispered, admiring the work on your wrist, his fingers still burning through you as he pulled you gently towards him. His breath fanned your face as his gaze lowered to your lips, you edged closer, giving him silent consent as the stars drew in closer. His lips touching yours. So soft and demure as his moist lips touched your very soul. You placed your hands on his shoulders as his fingers dug into your waist, his lips moving so slowly as if he was savouring this moment. Both of you deepened it, as if you were on the same wavelength, enjoying this moment of magical energy as he pulled you closer, your legs draping over his legs. Your lips parted, heavy breathing as he pulled you into his embrace, cradling you as if you could break any moment.

Months had passed which were similar, passion in the dark and the words, understanding and warmth that passed through both of you. When he held you, cupping the back of your head. He was there during your final exams, waiting for you outside the gates with roses and a card, you had pounced on him as if he was about to disappear into smoke. The emotions, feelings and everything in between was overwhelming but you welcomed it every time. You welcomed the love that took over every vessel, you welcomed the hurt that came with a disagreement, you welcomed loving him with every naive bone in your body.

Until that all changed.

You couldn’t pin point it exactly but it was during the months of summer, you had been away on holiday for a few weeks and came back to an empty text exchange. He hadn’t thought to ask if you enjoyed the holiday, if you’re okay, if you’re having a nice time. He seemed to just… go. Leave. Some would call it ghosting. You would call it ultimate heartbreak. After unpacking, you noticed a text come through, like a wild and hungry dog you opened it with a ferocity that had shocked you. Your heart thundered in your chest as the text read:

A: we need to talk, y/n.

Okay. Perhaps it wasn’t going to be too bad, you had thought. Wondering what he could possibly want to speak about, you had been fine with each other up until the last week you had been away. You assumed it was his summer job, or he had been getting wasted, which was something that had been happening recently. So you dropped everything, now you cringed at the fact you basically crawled over to him at his beckon, but love trumps all. You appeared at the gates of his home, the dark spirals of roof looked overhead as Alicent opened the door with her big brown eyes and full lips.

“Y/N!” She exclaimed, pulling you into a hot embrace. Alicent had always been so lovely to you, inviting you in and making you feel as if her home was yours. She made a banging hot coco as well, “you look so well, my love,” she kissed your cheeks and stepped aside for you to enter into the grand foyer of the house.

“Thank you, Ali.” You had gotten close enough for a shortened name, and that basically said it all about how comfortable you felt with her.

“He’s upstairs, love,” you looked back now, at that time, and remembered a look of sadness pass over Alicent as quick as a blink. But at the time, you were simply itching to see Aemond.

When you opened his door, he was sat at the edge of the bed, topless with grey sweatpants that made you hot under the collar. There was something wrong, it was in the air, hanging thickly over both of you and it was killing you inside because you didn’t know how to make it go away. He turned up at you, his eye sad and eye patch turned upwards so his glass eye was rolling in his head as he made to stand up.

“Aemond,” you whispered, closing the door quietly behind you and stepped forward, just shy of a full step. He smiled sadly as he looked away, his hand passing over his jaw, “what is it?” You walked over to him then, taking his hand into yours, begging him silently to look at you. Eventually he did.

“Y/N,” his voice almost broke, and you tried so hard to suck in the breath as you awaited the blow he was about to knock into you, “we need to talk.” You nodded, agreeing and sitting on the bed with him, your hand still in his.

“You have to know how sorry I am, I never meant for any of this to happen, I swear,” he swallowed hard as you watched him, careful and sadly, you braced your walls to collapse around you and they certainly fucking did when he said, “I’ve met someone.” You gaped as him, the words repeating in your head like a train on speed as he looked away from you, obviously guilty and letting go of your hand.

“You did what?” You hissed, snatching your hand back into your lap before he could fully let go. He turned to you, his face suddenly hard, like it had been all that time ago.

“I’ve met a girl, y/n,” he repeated,

“I heard that,” you snapped, “what do you mean?” Your heart almost leaped into your throat, tempted to spit it onto his hand to show him what those words had done to you,

“We haven’t been working well lately, around these last two months we just haven’t spoken,” he shrugged as if that was an excuse,

“We had exams, Aemond,” you scoffed, looking anywhere but at him, “I didn’t have the time to speak to you, how many times did I apologise for that?” You fought against your voice breaking and the tears from piling up into your eyes.

“Yeah, well, I’m sorry, y/n. But it’s happened and I can’t do anything about it now,” he sighed, suddenly standing up. Leaving you reeling, your lungs catching as the breath refused to let go of the tension in your shoulders. You watched him stand at his window, looking out into his acres of land as if pretending to be in a music video. You couldn’t comprehend how to feel, angry? That didn’t seem to be enough. Sad? That was too overwhelming to allow into your mind. You waited, the air suddenly thick as he creaked his window open, popping a cigarette into his mouth.

“Why?” You finally asked, he hummed as he thought of his words,

“She gets me, y/n,” he finally answered after some hesitation. Those words hit you hard and deep within your poor broken heart as you imagined all those good memories with him, when he held you as you crossed a shallow river to get to the other side: all of them now fractured fragments. You sighed deeply, keeping your tears in your face as you stood, patting down your jeans in the process.

“I understand,” you turned to leave, not wanting another moment in his presence before he blurted,

“I wish it could’ve been different,” he was staring at you now, you turned and gave him the deadliest look before you left; tears finally streaming down your face as you stormed out of his stupidly large house.

The months that followed were spent face down in your bed, crying out in pain as his sister held you, when Alys had to coax you out of your cave with a promise to see your favourite band in concert. All this time, you still saw him at school with her, Arya Stark, the girl you sat next to in Math. He held her hand, clasping his fingers tightly around hers as you walked past him in the hallways… wishing for it all to just fucking end.

Then it did. It was summer and you had finished, finally. You didn’t have to see that devastating beauty every day, you didn’t have to go back to your room in floods of tears and you definitely didn’t have to think about him again. Eventually, you began to heal, knowing that it was over and there was nothing you could’ve done to stop him from cheating on you. You hoped one day he would feel the pain he put onto you, but you were patient enough to wait for that because you knew you’d be healed and he would be neck deep in a relationship he helped bring down. Despite all the healing and the emotional rebuild, he still crept around your mind, like a shadow. He was still there. Often you thought about what life would be like with him now and you allow yourself to grieve what could’ve been, it would be stupid to ignore it.

So when you saw that birthday text on your phone, with the pads of your thumbs hovering over the keyboard and a thundering heart that almost hurt… you turned your phone off. Letting him go and hoping he was already facing the torment that you were waiting for.

[dearlazerbunny]

hii! idk if you take requests anymore but i js wanted to tell you i loved your if when then fic and wanted to request hcs for kyoya with a reader of average size that struggles with undereating and bad body image and dysmorphia? hope you’re doing well x

Sooooooo I missed the headcanon request and wrote a whole thing... apologies. Glad you liked if/when/then, it's probably one of my favorites :)

.....

Nothing fits. Not a single fucking scrap of clothing on earth will fit properly, which statistically seems impossible, but here you are standing in the mirror with fifteen plus discarded outfits flung across the room and the mirror that’s as tall as the ceiling mocking you because nothing. Fucking. Fits.

This is exhausting. And the night hasn’t even started.

You glance at the clock, and then your phone, ignoring all the group chats pinging off about the school dance you’re supposed to be attending tonight- everyone is sharing advice on makeup and hair, lamenting their new shoes are giving them blisters, arguing about who is going to dance with who first. The Host chat also has the same pre-event whirlwind that happens before just about any time the group gets together: the twins sending stupid memes, Tamaki screeching about last minute details, Honey wondering what flavor of cake to eat first, and Haruhi admonishing everyone for running late (also per usual). Every so often Mori’s icon will float in and out as he lurks among the chaos.

You go back to staring in the mirror, trying very hard not to throw yourself off the nearest available balcony. The Ootori estate has plenty of them, that’s for sure. You can take your pick of which ornamental piece of architecture would be best for dramatic effect.

There’s a quiet knock on the door, three taps made by the back of two long, slender fingers that you’d recognize anywhere. “Y/N? May I come in?”

“One second!” There’s a robe around here somewhere. Silk and chiffon and ruffled lace get shoved aside as you drape it over you, tying the waist ribbon just a smidge too tight for comfort. It digs into the skin of your stomach, rubs up against your bottom ribs just enough to hurt, but you can’t bring yourself to redo the knot. Once you’re covered, you unlock the door. “I’m good.”

Kyoya strides into the room already dressed, looking resplendent in a well-tailored suit and shoes that click ever-so-subtly against the floors. His tie is loose though, and his cuffs not yet buttoned, which makes you smile. No one ever gets to see him less than perfectly put together. That’s reserved just for you. “Tell me why I go to the trouble of planning these events to start at the same time every time, and yet everyone decides they must scramble at the last minute anyways.”

“Hmmm.” You pretend to look puzzled. “Two options. One, because no one appreciates your genius and brilliant event planning skills; two, because half your friend group are scatterbrained hyperactive teenage boys that are barely on time even with Haruhi kicking them in the ass?”

He smirks. “Clearly the answer is both.” He holds an arm out as an invitation and you take it, staunchly ignoring the flutters of unsettledness in your stomach as he wraps you into a hug from behind. He’s taller than you and can comfortably rest his chin on the top of your head. Him in his finery and you in your hair, makeup, and frumpy robe make a strange picture. “Are you almost ready? The car will be here shortly.” One of his arms stays around you while another reaches to gently trace a jeweled earring that’s shimmering in the low light. “You look beautiful,” he murmurs into your hair, and the compliment that normally gives you warm fuzzies does nothing but make things worse.

You give him a very fake smile, but it’s currently the best you can do. “Almost. Just- can’t decide what to wear. Too many options!” The laugh that comes out of you is absolutely pitiful and an octave higher than your normal voice. You pray he doesn’t notice.

“I thought you’d decided on this one?” A scarlet gown with a simple empire waist silhouette, some pleating along the bust, and two delicate straps that tie into bows and leave a gauzy, ethereal train of tulle draped down your back. It’s very Brigerton, Haruhi had mentioned in passing, and you were so excited she’d finally started watching the show (you’d been begging her for months!) you almost tackled her in the hallway wanting to discuss every detail. It's a good memory. You’d been so excited to wear it tonight. He pulls it from the haphazard pile of fabric and lays it out so the skirt drapes over the edge of the bed.

 “I did. Thought I’d changed my mind…” you gesture to the dozen or so other gowns you’d pulled from various places. “I don’t know. Just…” you shrug, trying not to let your anxiety radiate into the room.

“Perhaps we just change the night’s theme?” His smile is light, teasing. “I’m sure showing up in our robes and slippers we’d certainly be the talk of the night.” It’s a joke. He’s joking. He’s kidding. And how could he know that the thought of any of these dresses even touching you makes you want to crawl out of your skin, or that your two layers of shapewear feel impossibly tight, or that the thought of anyone even looking at you in anything but a sweatshirt the size of Mori makes you want to scream? To your horror, tears start to form in the corners of your eyes, and you turn away, hands flying to your face. “I- Y/N? Are you alright? Are you hurt? What-”

“Stop, stop, please, I can’t-” you look up towards the ceiling, blinking rapidly, fingers under your lower lashes to catch the makeup threatening to run down your face. “Just stop. I’m fine. I just- need a second.”

He’d gone to reach for you but stops short. Hesitating. It takes an embarrassingly long time to get yourself under control, and quite a few more deep breaths that you’re hyper aware he’s probably counting. You’re fine. You’re fine. Pull it together for god’s sake, this is pathetic. Just put on a fucking dress and deal. You’re so lost in your own head that his hand brushing against your elbow makes you jump as though he’s frightened you. “Y/N. What’s wrong?”

“It’s stupid. It’s really stupid, okay? And it’s usually fine and I can just ignore it but tonight it’s just really bad and I know we have to go to this freaking dance and I really don’t want to but just give me a second and I’ll put something on and we can go-” You have to practically gasp for air, swaying as the headache behind your temples pounds harder, and his hands go from your elbow to gripping both of your forearms to steady you. Ever so gently, he moves you to sit on the bed, ignoring your near panic attack with grace. He’s looking at you with such solemn eyes it makes you want to cry more. “Kyoya I swear I’m good, okay? I’m fine. We’re going to be late.”

“We will arrive exactly when we need to.” He sits next to you, making sure he’s close enough to reach if you want him, but not touching you in case you don’t. “What have you eaten today? The schedule has been hectic, I know.”

“No,” you mumble, knowing it’s not the right answer. “Because if I ate anything I was going to get bloated and then they’d fit even worse.”

“Do the gowns not fit? That’s easily fixed.” He goes into planning mode, pushing his glasses up further onto the bridge of his nose. “We’ll have something delivered. We have several designers on call- would you prefer something similar to these? Or a different style entirely?”

“They fit. I mean, they zip and everything. They just don’t- look good.” The tears want to make a comeback. “They don’t look good on me. I don’t look good. Okay?”

“Darling. I am certain that’s not true.”

“Well, thanks, but you’re not exactly an unbiased opinion now are you?”

“Y/N-”

You rip the red dress off the bed and hold it up over yourself like you’re playing dress up with someone else’s clothes. “I look bad, Kyoya! My chest is weird and my arms look fat and the color practically screams ‘look at me, here I am, everyone please judge every single little bit of me!’” You close your eyes so you don’t have to look at him and grip the dress so hard you’re definitely leaving wrinkles, but it keeps your fingers from clawing their way against your stomach in frustration. “When you dance, everyone watches, because of course they do, but that means when I dance with you they’re going to see everything that’s wrong and I just can’t- I can’t do it, okay? I can’t.”

Kyoya takes the dress from you, loosening your fingers until they can grip him instead of satin. His hands are cool, fingers woven tight between yours, and you can’t bear to look at him after what you’ve just admitted. “How long have you felt like this?” His voice is so, so soft.

“I mean- usually? Always?” You shake your head. “Usually it’s manageable and I can just not think about it, but sometimes it gets- bad.” You laugh a little, and it’s thick, like it doesn’t want to leave your chest. “Of course it’s always when it’s least convenient.”

“I love you.” You focus on his fingers, his grip, not loosening for a second, matching your energy.

“I know. I wish that helped.”

“Come here.” He pulls you forward, him perched on the foot of the bed and you standing in front of him. Those same cool fingers wipe your face, the pad of his thumb brushing your cheekbones. “You do not need to go tonight, if it’s causing you this much distress. The club can survive without you for one night, I assure you.”

There’s a little bit of warmth in his voice, and that manages to soothe just a hint of the storm raging in your chest. “And be jealous of all the pretty girls who get to have a song with you? I don’t like that option either.” You smile at him, just a little though it’s tinged with sadness and lingering frustration. “No matter what, I’m miserable.”

You both pause there for a moment, quiet, and in the stillness the situation and your emotions settle into something slightly more manageable. Still simmering, still present, but less threatening. How he does it, you don’t know, but something about him just… helps. It always does. You count his breaths with the slight rustle of his collared shirt, focus on the way he soothes you with a hand on your arm. You breathe with him. You let your shoulders relax, just a bit, then force them to relax a little more.

“Dances mean nothing when they aren’t with you. But you know that.”

You huff, but have to smile at him. A real one this time. “The entirety of Ouran Academy is devastated.”

He picks up the dress from where it was discarded to the side. Smooths the skirt, untangles the straps. Slides the zipper down. “May I?” You hesitate for a second. Then two. He doesn’t push you, and you know he wouldn’t blame you at all if you said no. But instead you untie the robe, shrugging it off. The shapewear covers you fully, but he still averts his gaze as he helps you step into the garment and pull it up onto your body. The zipper doesn’t hesitate and glides up your back, then hooks securely at the top. Kyoya ties the straps into bows, adjusting them to your liking, before leading you to the mirror once again.

The dress really is a pretty color. You’d chosen it partially because it would look good with his suit, and it does. The skirt falls the way it needs to despite the abuse you’ve put it through in the last hour. You straighten out a seam here and there. Kyoya watches you fiddle with the details, unjudgmental. “Tell me what you see. Honestly.”

He raises an eyebrow. “Biased opinion and all?”

You roll your eyes. “Kyoya. Please.”

“Hmmm.” He appraises you as though you’re fine art, something valuable, and you can feel your cheeks flush under his gaze- though it’s a little more welcome this time. “The first thing I always notice is your eyes.” He puts a finger underneath your chin and raises it, making you appear more confident than you feel. “Whether they’re laughing, or stormy, or lost in thought. I always want to decipher them. Know what’s behind them. Then, there’s the hair that’s always out of place.” You unconsciously reach up to tuck it behind you ear, but he stops your hand and does it for you, tucking it back with practiced ease. “I love it, because it’s an excuse to touch you.”

“I usually notice your outfit, yes, but whether it’s an evening gown or your uniform or one of your old sleep shirts, the consensus is always the same. How you take over my thoughts no matter what. How I look for any reason to be closer to you. How I hope you know how beautiful you are. Perhaps I don’t tell you enough.” He won’t let you look away. “You are stunning. That never changes. To me, you are perfect. I cannot take your thoughts away, but I hope I can try to ease them whenever you need me to.” Another smile, so warm you almost don’t want the moment to end. “I have no issue lavishing you with how exquisite you are to me.”

“You are such a flatterer.” And he is, this is true. But the dress suddenly lays just a bit nicer around your torso and isn’t quite so tight in the areas you were fixated on before. The color seems brighter. It’s a little easier to breathe.

“Correct. But that doesn’t mean I lie.” A light kiss to your temple, and you lean into him, settling back into your own skin with far less anxiety than you started with. It still isn’t perfect. It might never be. But perfect to him, well. You’re not one to live your life for a man. But maybe that can be a start.

He helps you clasp your necklace and put on your shoes, doing the buckles for you so you don’t have to bend down. A pair of elbow length gloves gets added at the last second, thanks to that conversation with Haruhi. They both hide the residual trembling in your hands and look absolutely fantastic as Kyoya kisses the back of your palm. “As I said. Stunning.”

Another smile, which he returns. “Let’s go, before I change my mind.”

“Only if you promise to eat once we arrive.” He winks at you on the way out, so subtle you almost miss it. “I plan to keep my favorite dance partner busy tonight.”

[fictional-gods-tournament]

Round 1

Characters' info under the cut

Xie Lian (wiki)

Domains: Ascended thrice and was banished twice. First time as a Martial God, second time as a God of Misfortune, third time as a Scrap God.

Propaganda:

To ascend to godhood once is already a rarity. Twice is unheard of. But thrice??? How cool is that? He keeps getting banished by the Heavenly Emperor but the Heavens (a separate power over which the Emperor has no power over) want him up there sooooooo bad. Xie Lian is a person who once said 'Live Laugh Love' to a ghost and then said ghost took it so incredibly personally they decided to make his life living hell until he was just like them. Xie Lian went through all of that and just became kinder as a result. He spent around 800 years living with the worst luck possible of his own will just because he wanted to atone for what he had done when the ghost had nearly broken his spirit (the events preceding his second ascension). He's God's whumpiest soldier. He's an incredibly unreliable narrator because he simply Will Not think about things even if it's relevant to the story until he's face to face with them and unable to ignore them any longer. He's suffered so much physical trauma over his life that he can no longer feel pain. He starts the book not particularly healed from the trauma but he's compartmentalized it enough to be relatively stable and then the book takes a sledgehammer to every single one of his weakpoints so he can actually heal. Good thing his third ascension allowed his future husband to finally find him after the same 800 years of searching (they knew each other in the past) and he can be there to support him through it all <333 yes this book is a BL. He's gay and he gets a husband who adores him so much he defied death and literally became the world's strongest ghost by the force of his love. Xie Lian my beloved. Vote Xie Lian The loser. The layoff. The legend. It's the Trash God himself, coming back into the ring for round three. This god was kicked out of heaven and pulled back by complete accident on account of his sheer power - on more than one occasion - but he'd much rather spend his days taking naps, sweeping the floor of his little shack, and sending lavender essential oil tips in his heavenly groupchat. No one gives off great-great-great-grandpa vibes quite like he does, and when he's put his nose to the grind, he's racked up a good spectrum of feats. (Including but not limited to: a coincidental military escapade, swashbuckling, saving a falling kid from a balcony, and several horrific warcrimes.) He's perservered for 800 long years and is long overdue for a break, so here's to a peaceful future alongside his wonderful ghost husband, who would probably be cooking the celebratory meal for this tournament in interest of not giving the other competitors dysentery. As his friends could tell you, he's got a good heart, he's just a bit of a cosmic plaything sometimes - but deep down, don't we all have a clown in us? He is one of the few characters in a lot of media I’ve consumed that feels so real to me. He is a god but he is so human in his way of acting. His backstory is incredibly complex and tragic, so glad he got a rich husband in the end. He deserves everything I love him so much ohhhh my god someone more eloquent needs to write propaganda for him cause all I can say is 🥰🥰🥰🥰 Please

Celestia

Domain: The Sun

[komoboko]

Sooooooo-

I've been stalking your blog- (mueheheh and I love your posts and writings 😭)

Can I request a kokushibo x Fem! Artist! Reader who often gets frustrated over little things whenever she messes her drawings up? And probably gives the most scary glares and annoyed looks. Meanwhile, he tries to comfort her.

Thank you! May you have a great day/night ahead!

𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞

kokushibo tsugikuni x gn!artist!reafer

This is set a little closer to when he was human so he can actually comprehend everything ur doing

Kokushibo doesn’t understand why you’re so mad at first.

While he does not completely blame you, he’s only more confused on why you’re feeling this way. In some ways he can link your frustration to his.. “occupation” so he can sympathize and understand you more.

He can’t say he doesn’t get annoyed himself when he can’t kill a certain group of slayers in the time he pleased. Maybe another victim found their way around and ran off as the sun started to rise. Mistakes like that frustrate him to. Kokushibo just doesn’t understand why you’re so upset about the tiniest of things.

Let say you try to start a new painting and something slightly goes off of the pattern or escape the lines. You’ll scrap it with an irritated glance before staring again on the next canvas. Bits and pieces of left behind are over something so tiny scatter around everywhere.

Not only does he not like what you’re getting mad at, he does not like the storm that follows.

Your temper rises significantly, and the amount of evil glances that meet at least one of kokushibo eyes will make him close all six of them to avoid yours. There is much more passive aggressiveness to any word you say and overall just a force of nature to be around.

Your attitude reminds him of an open wound, when you first add treatment like alcohol, it begins to burn.

Of course after you just patch it up so it can heal.

The next time you try and discard another piece, kokushibo is there to stop you. You could only look up at him with confusion, you can’t say there was slight irritation behind your eyes. Nevertheless you let him speak before you said anything yourself.

“Why must you wear yourself down?” The six eyed demon asked. You don’t reply, your eyes only drift down towards the countless crumbled pieces of paper that scatter the floor. Kokushibo takes your silence as a proper response and sees fit to continue.

He blinks before picking up a crumbled piece of paper unfolding it for you to see. “Humans are always to stubborn.” He blurts out turning back to you and holding up the two copies of paper. “Nearly identical copies that any human wishes they could draw themselves. Yet you crumble and throw them away like nothing.”

You turn your eyes away either from shame or anger and irritation. The demon before you only stares at you a sigh escapes his lips trying to find the proper words to say. “Mortals like you always try to strive for perfection when you already have it.” You perk up hearing his words.

“Self perfection can lead to self destruction if you don’t bring yourself back to reality.” His words shiver ringing in your ear. It only brings you back to reality, harsh words that really have a sweet meaning underneath. Your eyes drift back to your art and then back to the discarded treasures that litter the floor.

Kokushibo noticing the glint in your eyes hesitates before stepping closer. Slowly wrapping his arms around you to bring you into his embrace. You lean into his surprising warmth he’s providing as a needed sigh finally escapes your lips.

“Thank you.” Is all your able to mutter before your head moves to the crook of his neck, his hand coming around to rub circles slowly on your back.

Kokushibo can’t help but feel a slight smile spread across his lips. While healing takes steps he finds some happiness that you’ve taken the first leap of faith.

[studioeisa]

hihi i saw your wips and the minute i saw academic rivals teacher!wonu, i was already excited !! (ᗒᗨᗕ) knowing you, i know it’s gonna be sooooooo gooooood !!!

i can already imagine the amount of chemistry and tension it’s gonna have (๑>ᴗ<๑) i also feel that there’s gonna be a bit of humour in it (correct me if i’m wrong though !)

happy writing my love ! ♡ ～('▽^人)

loml sara, you are so, so right!!! academic rivals teachers!wonwoo is actually from xinganaho's svt x reverse tropes verse, and it has all the tropes you can expect: rivals to lovers, forced proximity, academia ~drama~ and moreee ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧ it's still just an idea clanging around in my brain so most of my plans are scraps so far, but here's the wonwoo look i envision + some situations i expect him to get in with our mc lol

mc and wonwoo are homeroom advisors to elementary students (added layer of them needing to keep their 'rivalry' on the down low because their students are literally kids)

mc's class is the top-performing class of the month. wonwoo is not happy

mc and wonwoo have to work together as chaperones during a school field trip

mc and wonwoo show off during the principal's evaluations/try to subtly sabotage each other to the best of their abilities

mc and wonwoo are set up on a blind date by their co-faculty who hope that the two simply need to relieve their tension through other means

mc/wonwoo has to substitute for the other's class due to unforeseen circumstances; mc/wonwoo now has to bear their kids asking about their rival a lot more often

mc and wonwoo get a little too competitive at the school's annual intramurals/faculty's team-building weekend

when mc and wonwoo meet outside of school for the first time, they realize... huh. maybe this person's not so bad (until the next school day rolls around, that is)

[pebiejeebies]

TYY <33

I did a little eh uh

sketsh 😀

Constructive criticism PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

I know there’s smth wrong with the body but WHAT IS IT RURURHHGHHHHGGGHH

MAYBE ITS THE TILT??? NO I THINK ITS FINE BUT THERES SOMETHING ELSE RRRRGGGHHHHAAGHHHJ?!!!!!

I HATE DRAWING ANATOMY (I used someone’s art as a ref lmfao)

PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM!! (you can draw over my sketch to explain too if you want)

just realized how goofy the hand looks lmfajyfsghj

[beesmygod]

Bea I have taken a little beastie off the street bc he was too friendly to be out there, and my resident cat is being a hater. Keeps trying to break into his enclosure (bathroom) to beat his ass. Share your cat introduction wisdom

Him btw (misprinted like shelley), and also the baby hater

god we really did have this exact same problem BUT its been over a year since we got babybel and they're still weird to each other. not BAD, theyre just not best friends. but they only had a fur flying scrap once in that time, its not NOTHING.

my advice is to continue all the cat advice stuff online and DON'T stop just bc its hard and it sucks. feed them on opposite sides of a door. swap blankets, pillows and cat beds so they get used to the smell. a weird thing that helped was feeding the resident cat before the new one. and expect bumps along the way!!! dont get discouraged by beast behavior.

also SOOOOOOO CUTE!!! STINKERS

[thevampirekingg]

A scrapped sketch of a scene from Ena: Dream Bbq I redrew as I fell in love with this game when it came out and I still am, between the music design and way it's animated and done I love it all!! Raghgg

Anyways I'm also going to be posting sketches here sooooooo...