#steveb

[cowzone]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Marvel, Captain America - All Media Types, Captain America (Chris Evans Movies) Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers Characters: Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes, Peggy Carter, Chester Phillips Additional Tags: Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Depressed Bucky Barnes, Depressed Steve Rogers, Suicidal Steve Rogers, Hurt No Comfort, Whump, Period-Typical Homophobia, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Broken Bones, Not Beta Read, Loss of Parent(s) Summary:

Bucky's suffering and then death on the Train leaves Steve in the deepest depths of despair, leading to his ultimate choice.

or

Sort of Re-telling of CATFA but focusing solely on Stucky bits, but with additional scenes and feelings and shit thrown in mixed with headcanons.

[jttlpgroup]

Nothing we do can change the past .. but everything we do changes the future.

[dark-art-666]

[yuri-defender]

 recently got into pokemon creepypasta (somehow) and I uhh like strangled red (steven) so far

(Still learning about the other too)

[ask-steven-stevenson]

we're. we're gonna get better. we're FINALLY gonna get better oh god......

hes happy chat trust hes justtttt........ emotional processing issues. take a bug trying desperately not to cry as he goes back to being. phone to prevent that.

we're gonna be fine, right dad?

“..I. I mean. I do believe so yes! Also, you don’t have to keep this form. You can if you so wish! I will say, any form you take you’ll still be my son. Yeah.?

[politecatangelica-ec]

Does forcas or angelica know abt skibidi toilet??

“Yes... well actually I've heard of it and I think Forcas knows more about Skibidi Toilet. He acts like a toddler if you want me to be honest”

Forcas barges in the area, trying to look and probably act serious, Whole chance this angel is also just trying to act like a human?

"HEY! I DONT ACT LIKE A TODDLER! I act serious sometimes! You're just jealous you don't have rizz and I have rizz!!!"

"What in the world are you saying.."

(I don't have my sister with me to help with Forcas's line, I don't even know what any of the words I wrote in meant)

[ask-jake-wilson]

points at him

GAYBOY GAYBOY GAYBOY GAYBOY-

“WHAT PROOF DO YOU HAVE THAT I’M GAY?? … EXACTLY.”

[jils-things]

part of the reason why i rb'd that gif post is that

i got pokemon masters ex .

[threegoldfish]

Whether a doctor would be better if he were to push Marc to take medication, to make him see that Steven isn't real - isn't his own living being - might be open to one's personal opinion; If someone were to tell Marc about this, the fact that a doctor would be considered better if he were to push him in those ways, he'd be very much against it, certainly.

Because he feels seen right now, acknowledged, his feelings taken instead of being dismissed. Of course he knows, somewhere inside himself, that Steven is part of himself - he doesn't believe in the whole thing of being possessed or whatever, definitely not, and he has seen some movies were people have split personalities, all of that. But it just doesn't feel this way to him, not at all; Steven does not feel like he is part of him, he feels like he has somehow found his way into this body and lives alongside Marc, just sharing the same parents, the same upbringing, the same... everything.

Some might call that whole thing a brother-situation then, for obvious reasons, but.. no, Steven's not a brother to Marc, not at all. Randall was his brother, not Steven; He's just another person. It even goes as far as Marc being able to recognize that Steven's existing within the same body whenever he has it, but at the same time he doesn't see himself when he's watching, when he looks at the other living his boring happy life.

---A deep inhale of air, a slow, measured exhale right after. It's so hard to talk about it, all of this, but feels so relieving to know that Harrow isn't openly seeing him as insane in return (whatever he thinks about Marc internally? No idea.). In fact, the doctor is surprisingly open - even acknowledges the closeness that Marc feels for Steven, how much he cares, how badly he wants him to be okay and alright; God, he hopes that Harrow isn't just playing a game here, trying to lure Marc in just to... try and strip it all away from him.

Gaze back on the other man, jaw working a bit, Marc... nods. Once. Twice. Then swallows, takes another inhale, sits more upright. He takes the last sip of iced tea from that squished bottle, then puts it back onto the desk in front of himself, palms now flat on top of his thighs as his gaze trails - thoughtful, again, moved and deeply affected by everything.

"...I think you're right." A small mumble, but loud enough to be heard with how damn silent it is inside this white, sterile office. "He... he should know, at some point. It's... not fair, right? To... leave him in the dark about things for such a long time. He did already wake up in here, and it freaked him out; He thinks he did something wrong, that his sleep-walking is making things bad, but... it's been me, the whole time it's been me who fucked things up - and he's here because of me. Because of what I did..."

A pause, a swallow, dark eyes back on Harrow; A sudden realization causing him to blink, a hint of dread washing over his features---

Steven had managed to slip into the body without him knowing, which didn't happen before. Okay, alright. But... but Marc doesn't remember killing that one guy, right? Doesn't remember having hurt the others as well. Just as he doesn't remember Steven waking and talking to Harrow...

No. No, it wasn't--- it couldn't have been---

"...I don't remember what I did. I don't remember Steven waking up in here." Panicked, suddenly, Marc swallows again and inhales, then exhales in what is a purposeful take of breath to keep himself calm. Don't freak out, don't freak out, it's fine, this wasn't Steven!

"Do you... do you think that Steven... --No, no, it wasn't Steven. Steven wouldn't hurt a fly. Steven hates violence. Steven never defends himself and prefers to give in instead. He catches spiders and makes sure to not accidentally step on bugs whenever he's got enough attention left to do so. He would never--- no, he doesn't have it in him to... to---" Fuck. "...Right? No, he doesn't have it in him. He would never do that. Steven would never hurt someone like this and he would never kill anyone!"

A series of blinks in rapid succession, with Marc bringing a hand up to rub his fingers along his lips, thinking, brows knitting, eyes wide as he realizes that, maybe---

"...No, it must've been me. I'm sure it was me. I just... m-maybe I've got... some other stuff going on that prevents me from remembering. People can suffer from amnesia, right, after doing things sometimes? Y-yeah, yeah, I'm--- I know it wasn't him, it must've been me. There's no other way, no. No, there isn't---"

It wasn't his first blackout. But... but the ones before must've been coincidences...!

"...Yeah, it must've been me. I... killed a guy. I'm just not remembering. Amnesia, that kind of stuff? Yeah."

It feels a lot easier to just accept it than to allow a different possibility to rise up, one that makes him feel as if the room is freezing suddenly. So he pushes that away, out of his mind, doesn't even allow the thought to form.

Arthur found himself struggling to find words, for only a second. It was a surprising amount of intimacy for an internal relationship; Marc crying as if Steven were a real person, worrying over upsetting Steven. Factually, there was nothing to worry about - Steven was created by Marc, and to some extent, Marc had control over that. They were the same being, the same soul, only divided. 

But it wouldn’t be right to say that; because Marc chosen to believe that Steven was real. And even if facts spoke opposite, Arthur had always been more lenient when it came to the spiritual side of things; Marc believed Steven was real. Steven believed that he was real. What more was needed, for a person to qualify as existing? 

It would be wrong to dismiss anything that Marc was saying. Every word was spoken with an aching amount of care, and that was more than enough. 

“You didn’t take anything from him,” Arthur answered, gently, meeting Marc’s gaze. “You gave him a life. I can… understand why you think that everything he owns is fake, but I don’t think that’s fair to say. His memory is as real as yours, isn’t it? Memory, language, emotions - all of these things are real, regardless of their lack of physical presence. If he remembers waking up, drinking tea, reading a book, laughing - then all of that happened.” 

He narrowed his eyes only a bit, for a fraction of a moment, as if trying to read something on Marc. “It was real because he lived it. That’s what memory is, that’s what life is. And you made sure he got that. You gave him a life that would make him happy - that’s not deception. It’s devotion. It’s care.” 

He stayed there for a moment, before leaning back, sitting a bit more properly in his seat. “He’s going to learn the truth eventually. That’s something you can’t keep hidden forever - no matter how badly you want to. The change will frighten him, sure. He might get emotional - he might get upset with you. He might be hurt, for a little while. But when he looks back on his memories - even if they’re ones you created - he’ll always have that knowledge with him. That you created them. That you wanted him to be happy, that you loved him enough to want him to have that.” 

He paused, keeping Marc’s gaze, nodding gently. “And yes, I think he’ll forgive you. Not because he has to, but because that’s who he is. I think he cares, too - even if he doesn’t fully understand everything, yet.” 

Talking so much made his jaw buzz, in a way he didn’t like; it was rare for him to speak too much, but something about the moment had him feeling moved. There was an emotional care here, one he knew he needed to cut before it got anywhere unsafe - but for the moment, he could be here for this. Could allow Steven to exist, despite the fact that he ultimately did more harm than good; a better doctor would be pushing for Marc to be taking medication.  A better doctor would make it clear that Steven couldn't exist.

He could be a better doctor tomorrow, when he wasn’t still weighed down by the emotional burden of everything. 

[jttlpgroup]

[gotta-get-to-the-bottom-of-this]

Oh my god????

Man fuck it

I love Steven I NEED to make out with him. I need to see him crying and whining. He's MY babygirl.

I need to see him acting submissive and other stuff that I will not say for safety reasons but just know Im downright bad for that man.

Here I am screaming at my friends and writing a 1k word essay about why I find a Google stock image of some random person with a red rotary phone edited as a head is hot asf (they probably think Im insane) (i think they actually do)

Jesus Christ I want to KISS HIM SO BADLY and Im feeling brave enough to confess this in main and not go anon

Anyway

Time to start seeing a therapist

.

[ask-steven-stevenson]

mod how silly would it be if i asked for a fox plush for my birthday that is coming up soon..... real life steven gift.....

\\!! Do it!! Trust.. Steven dad real../silly -> well! Do it if you want to ofc !

[marvinmaee]

noo..!! Steveb..! What are u doing to angel Jimmy.. ☹️☹️

[politecatangelica-ec]

“The next procedure... Is.. wait what- an ask/RP blog? How?!”

Account Info is down here!!!

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Random Information:

This blog will contain short videos sometimes, depending on the questions you ask cause I ain't writing a wholw paragraph of action :3 and there's a chance if you ask Angelica your getting a drawing :D Also will random say Polite cat

PLSPLSPLSASK QUESTIONS OR RP IM BORED

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Rules!!:

-This blog may or may not have spoilers about the game if anyone asks about something related!

-Anon/asker magic is allowed!! :)

-I honestly don't care if you're being rude or whatever, joking or not sure

-I do roleplaying in this blog if you want to :D characters from other fandoms or ocs are completely fine if you are wanting to roleplay

-Questions on angsty stuff are allowed, but note I don't know how to write angst and it will be broken

-Ships are allowed in the blog, as long it's not illegal or something like that, and yes this applies to self-shipping or different characters. If you're using Forcas I am most likely gonna cry(Swap Forcas is fine!!!!)

-nsfw asks will most likely be ignored or answered with Forcas pointing and calling you a weirdo. We do not allow that to be in here, but I guess suggestive are fine as long as their not going somewhere weird..

-Remember! This blog is not canon whatsoever of course, just filled with headcannons of mine

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This blog includes the other characters, it's possible to ask about them!1!1!!!

Character colours:

Angelica- purple

Forcas-blue

The other nun-orange

Fallen angel-red

Narrating-green

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Tags I'll be using:

#Angelica answers you!

#Angelica role-playing

#Angelica role-playing with *character*

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This account may have out of character stuff, which I'm sorry about :') and Eloquent Countenance belongs to RDT(Racheldrawshis)

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Main account: @personnamedjamin

[ask-jake-wilson]

“Cause, you’re family now, I guess. Plus, Steven always said to be nice to ya. So, also, cause.. i don’t really hold a grudge.”

hello! It’s been a couple days so I thought I’d stop by…

@ask-harry-fitzgerald

“Oh. Hello! How have you been?”

[ask-jake-wilson]

A. ANON. THE BLUNT IS GONE </3 he. He smoked it all..