#the hell in this case is all the shit that goes untagged to avoid getting sent to the shadow realm

[unpretty]

THE PORNHUB CNC THING MAKES ME SO MAD IT’S LIKE 😭 c’mon man im not allowed to watch people do weird shit that’s been planned out and consented to but you’ve 600 thousand videos that got uploaded after a breakup???

the whole thing started because of some high profile lawsuits and articles about pornhub's problem with revenge porn and women who had their actual assaults uploaded to the website, and how easy it was for people to download and re-up those videos. and it's so hard to talk about without sounding dismissive of what happened to those women and girls, because it's fucked up that happened to them and true that pornhub was shit about dealing with that!

AND IT STILL IS

they fucking. cracked down and got rid of all these Problematic tags and as a result i have seen more untagged triggering content that i had ever seen before. even setting aside ending up on weird websites that brag about hosting revenge porn, shitty stuff is still all over pornhub!! there are so many better steps they could have taken!!! they could have made certain tags limited to professionals with a paper trail. they could have locked more features behind verified accounts. instead they made it impossible for me to watch a clearly well-paid professional valiantly pretend that she can sleep through [redacted] unless i'm willing to try to watch videos straight from the search engine results in order to not see the horrors on the actual website where the video is hosted

[adarlingwrites]

Dormouse

Summary:

After playing a game with two of The Beach's most dangerous members, the dormouse gets her tail caught by a tiger's paw.

He’ll make a wildcat out of her.

Author’s Notes:

You’ve reached the final chapter. To avoid spoilers, I won't be using CWs for this chapter. Disturbing and potentially triggering content are untagged. Readers have been warned.

XIII

cut through this razor wire | and dine on your heart | mine 'til the end

Lying on the floor and bleeding, Yamaneko calls out to Sunohara once again.

“Help me.”

The doctor springs into action, taking off her pristine white coat to press it against Yamaneko’s bleeding stomach. Then, she turns to the street artist. “You’re Hinata, right?”

Shaking and crying at the same time, the street artist nods. “Hinata, please apply pressure for me. I have to administer the antivenom. Can you do that?” Sunohara asks, brows furrowed in concentration.

The tan-skinned girl nods rapidly, crawling over to do as she’s told. As Sunohara excises the venom from Yamaneko’s hand with a scalpel, the militant turns to Hinata with a wry smile. “Well, welcome to the world of Heart games. It’s brutal as hell.”

“Would you please shut up? You’ve been bitten by a deadly snake and stabbed in the stomach. Please save your strength,” Hinata blurts, tears spilling from her eyes uncontrollably.

“You’re not my mother. Then again, I never really listened to her in the first place.” She tilts her head towards Mr. Yamane’s corpse. “Or him, for that matter.”

“You’re bleeding out but you still have the energy to joke?! You’re something else...”

“It’s how I coped with that bastard’s bullshit all these years, newbie.”

Needle sinking into her arm, Yamaneko didn’t flinch, unable to feel the pain at that point. As the last drop of the life-saving medicine leaves the syringe, the synthetic voice crackles from their phones’ speakers. “Game cleared. Congratulations!”

Yamaneko chuckles, which comes out as a garbled sob. “Congratulations, my ass. I don’t think I’ll make it.”

“Don’t say that. We’ll bring you back to the Beach for medical attention, okay?” Sunohara reassures her, bandaging her arm with a roll of gauze from the first aid kit that she always carries with her to the games.

“Let’s not fool ourselves,” Yamaneko slurs, head spinning. “Do you have anything I can write on?”

Hinata and Sunohara look at each other, then at Yamaneko. “I just need to leave a letter for my lover… in case I don’t survive this.”

With reluctance, Sunohara plucks her pen from the pocket of her bloodied doctor’s coat, while Hinata offers a notepad full of sketches, turning to a blank page and holding it for the wounded woman. Hand shaking, Yamaneko pens a hasty letter, tears the page from the notepad, and tucks it in her jacket.

“Let’s go.”

Palms cold and wet, Takatora waits outside Tokyo Zoo. His clothes are soaked with sweat, and his katana is soaked with blood, but there is barely a scratch on him. Tonight’s game has been a cakewalk for him.

He’s hoping the same for his lover.

Anxiety is radiating off of him, his face twitching every now and then from the subdued agitation he’s feeling.

“It’s too cold to be out,” Aguni calls out from the inside of the car, but Last Boss ignores him, opting to wait outside and greet Yamaneko once she emerges from the game venue.

Tapping his fingers against the dashboard, Aguni couldn’t help but be anxious too. “Yamaneko will be fine. She knows what she’s doing,” he mutters. Last Boss didn’t respond once again, but deep down, he hopes the chief is right.

So when Yamaneko emerges from the shadows, being dragged by two of her fellow players, he regrets not forcing her to adapt to his methods.

Long legs taking him as fast as they could to her, Last Boss catches Yamaneko in his arms, while Aguni near-smacks the car door off its hinges as he gets out of the car to look.

“Yamaneko.” There was a slight crack in Last Boss’ voice as he uttered his lover’s moniker. A bloody, swollen hand reaches out to touch his face. “Tora. My plan worked… but I think I should’ve gone with yours. I’m sorry. I was too stubborn.”

“Stop talking,” he hushes her, and carries her to the car.

Upon seeing the militants, Hinata panics. “Her father stabbed her, he wanted the antidote and she’s bleeding I-” she stammers, but Last Boss ignores her, laying his lover down.

“Explain later,” Aguni tells her, brusquely opening the door to the driver’s seat and twisting the car key into place. “You,” he addresses Sunohara. “Get in the backseat with them and help.”

The doctor nods, hopping in the car, and as soon as Hinata gets in the passenger seat, Aguni speeds off.

In the backseat, Yamaneko lies on Last Boss’ lap, while Sunohara presses her damn hardest on her stab wound. Despite the doctor’s best efforts and the vial of antidote, the combined injury and the effect of the venom on her blood is far too much. Blood painted the leather of the car seat, Sunohara’s hands, and Last Boss’ clothes.

“Hang in there,” the doctor near-cries. Her eyes meet with the tattooed militants’, and she gulps. “Don’t worry, once we get to the Beach, she’ll be fine-”

“Don’t make any promises you can’t keep.”

There is a subtle anguish hiding behind the militant’s deep voice. One large hand is cradling his lover’s head, while the other is gripping his katana, knuckles white from the tension.

A weak, broken chuckle escapes Yamaneko’s lips, and Last Boss turns his full attention to her.

“She’s just trying to make you feel better,” she croaks.

Glassy, bloodshot eyes met his, and when she opened her mouth to speak again, her teeth were stained with her blood. Last Boss couldn’t say a word, eyes wide and wet as he watched Yamaneko struggle to speak. Her tiny hand disappears into the pocket of her jacket, and she presses a folded slip of paper to her lover’s chest.

With cold, sweating hands, he takes it from hers, pockets it, and he goes back to cradling her. Shallow breaths kissed his cheek, and the wildcat’s eyes fluttered shut, which were heavy with fatigue.

“Yamaneko?” the tattooed militant mumbles, lips twitching. He leans in to hear if she’s still breathing, and she whispers something.

Then, he hears it; death rattles, a telltale sign that she’s slipping away. The rest of the ride is filled with solemn silence.

It’s too late for her when they arrived at the Beach.

The speakers didn’t need to be toppled over for the music to stop. There were no shouts that instructed the sea of people to get out of the way. Conversations died to whispers as people saw one of the most dangerous members of the Beach with a woman curled in his arms.

“Shit, is she dead?”

“There’s so much blood…”

“Wasn’t she his girlfriend or something?”

“Did he kill her?”

“I bet he stabbed her. That guy’s a psycho!”

“That’s what you get for hanging around with those militants…”

The whispers didn’t bother Last Boss anymore, who disappeared into the building with the others.

All the color from Yamaneko’s face is gone, and it’s her turn to lie on a gurney in the makeshift morgue, the harsh lights making her look ghostlike. Members of the executive board and the people who were present during her death surrounded her.

“Did she carry out her task, at least?” the Hatter asks, his usual jovial air gone.

“She succeeded,” Aguni responds, eyes flicking from his dead underling’s body to the women she played her last game with. “On the way here, those two said that before his death, her father admitted to committing the murders.”

“It’s a shame it has come to this,” Ann laments, crossing her arms. “She was becoming an important asset to the Beach, despite her allegiance to the military sect.”

Mira tuts. “And a promising Heart player too.”

“Great. We’ll have to find a replacement for her now,” Niragi sighs, slinging his rifle over his shoulder.

“Is that all you view her as? Someone who you can use to bring you game cards?” Hinata speaks up, fists clenched. Niragi shoots a sour look in her direction. “People die every day on the Beach. What makes her any different? You barely even know her. Everyone here barely even knows her.”

“Yeah? What about him, huh?” Hinata retorts, pointing to Last Boss.

Silence had befallen the room, and all eyes were on the tattooed militant. The corner of his mouth twitching, knuckles white, Last Boss gives Yamaneko’s corpse a long, hard look. A cold, large hand caresses her even colder forehead, and brushes her bangs off of her face.

“I’ll burn her body once you’re done cutting her open.”

Then, he turns around, leaving the room without saying another word.

“See?” Niragi chuckles. “He just left like he didn’t stick his dick in her just hours before.”

This time, the normally calm and gentle Sunohara snaps. “Don’t make assumptions about how people process grief. You don’t know how he feels, none of us do.”

Before an argument can erupt in the morgue, Hatter raises an open palm. “What anyone feels about her death is irrelevant now. What was certain is she died a loyal member of the Beach. Ann, carry on with your autopsy.” Then, he turns to Aguni. “You’re her chief. Give her a proper send-off after Ann’s procedures, if you want.”

One by one, people left the room, leaving only Ann and Sunohara inside. However, before Hinata departs, she walks over to the taller women, biting her lip.

“Hey. I think there’s something you need to know about her. I think her boyfriend should know too.”

Later that night, heavy boots thumped against the hotel’s carpeted floor. Aguni opens the door to an exclusive suite, where the Hatter is waiting, with no bodyguards present. Just the two of them.

Takeru pours his friend a shot of strong whiskey, and the leader of the militants downs it in one gulp. The shot glass makes a clinking sound as Morizono slams it down the coffee table.

“Mori,” Takeru calls his attention. “How are you holding up?”

With a weary sigh, he turns to his oldest friend. “I feel like shit. I shouldn’t have given her permission to carry out her plan alone. I thought putting her together with the doctor is enough to keep her safe.”

Drinking a shot of his own, Takeru moves closer to him. “Do you feel responsible for her death?”

“She’s my underling. It’s only normal.”

“I know you better than that, Mori.”

Aguni turns to his best friend, eyes bloodshot and wet, but the tears didn’t spill. “Like you said before, she’s a stabilizing element. Hell, somehow, she managed to make Niragi back off from that new girl, and Last Boss is calmer around her. To think I planned to train her so she can help me keep the others under control in the future…”

“That’s the most I’ve heard from you in a while. You cared about her, didn’t you?” Takeru asks, taking a fat stick of cigar and lighting it. Afterwards, he pours his friend another shot of liquor.

A single tear falls from the normally stoic, brusque man’s eye. “Those eyes of hers when she looks at her father… I saw the same eyes in the mirror years ago.”

He pauses, and gives Takeru a soft laugh. “A part of me wanted to be the father she never had. Huh, am I even old enough for that?”

Patting Morizono’s back, Takeru blows smoke out of his mouth.

“There’s the Mori I know, a softie underneath that hard exterior.”

Meanwhile, the door to Takatora and Yamaneko’s shared room creaks open. On the table is the vintage sewing machine Yamaneko took from the antique store in Shimokitazawa, along with the other things they’ve brought back.

Takatora runs his fingers across the smooth finish of the Singer, then he picks it up and throws it against the wall. Various items got flung across the room, from the knick knacks they gathered together, to the hotel’s heavy furniture.

“You should’ve listened to me,” he says to no one in particular.

“Yamaneko, you should’ve listened to me! You should’ve just killed him,” he rasps as he picks up a lamp and throws it to the ground, shattering it into pieces.

By the end of the night, the room is in ruins. The wallpaper is shredded, the bathroom sink is in pieces, and the tattooed man sits panting on the floor, eyes frenzied. As his breathing evens out, he remembers the folded piece of paper his lover gave him, and with trembling hands, he retrieves it from his pocket.

Unfolding it, he starts reading the contents.

“Tora, if you’re reading this, it means I’m gone. I’m sorry. Remember the day I asked you to kiss me? What you said to me that day was beautiful, so I lived by it. I’m thankful for this world. I’m thankful for you. Please continue living free in this world without me. You never told me if you believed in an afterlife, but if there is one, I’ll come looking for you after you’ve returned to the soil. I’m yours forever.”

Then he reads it, the same words she uttered with her dying breath.

“I love you.”

Takatora screams, head between his hands.

After some time, he passes out on the floor, curled over pillows he grabbed from the bed. They still smelled like her.

The next afternoon, he awakens to someone knocking. After rubbing the sleep off of his eyes, Last Boss picks up his katana, and opens the door. Aguni stands on the other side, a neutral expression on his face. The chief’s eyes wander around the room and sees its disheveled state, and clears his throat.

“Patrol with me. Now.”

Not bothering to close the door behind him, the tattooed man follows, head hung low.

Truth be told, Aguni didn’t know what to say. He didn’t even know what the other man was thinking about, but judging the state of his room, he’s not handling Yamaneko’s passing well. People whispered about Last Boss as they walked through the halls, and Aguni grits his teeth at the inane gossip.

“He’s terrifying.”

“Maybe she tried to leave him and he wouldn’t let her go.”

“From what I heard, she said no to him and it made him angry.”

“What did she even see in him?”

To avoid the risk of Last Boss snapping, Aguni moves on from that place, leading him away from prying eyes. As they rounded a corner, they came face to face with Doctor Sunohara, whose lips trembled as she pressed a clipboard against her chest.

“O-oh. Hey. I’ve been meaning to look for you. Last Boss, was it?”

With a blank stare, he nods, and Sunohara takes a sharp inhale. “Our autopsy just finished. I think there’s something you should know as Miss Yamane’s partner.” The doctor turns to Aguni. ‘If you don’t mind…”

“I’m Yamaneko’s chief. I’m responsible for her.”

“I see. Well, there’s no use beating around the bush.” Turning to the tattooed militant, Sunohara presses her lips in a tight line.

“Your partner… she was pregnant at her time of death.”

Neither of the two men didn’t know what to say, and just glared at the doctor with their tongues tied.

“Are you sure about this?” Aguni asks, folding his arms.

“To be fair, I was skeptical too. It’s been more than two weeks since I prescribed her emergency pills and birth control, so she should’ve been protected. Before she passed away, she bled from her privates. I thought it was just that time of the month or some spotting, but I found out that she neglected taking her medications. The girl you two were with also told me about her symptoms. So Ann and I tested her… and, well, the results returned positive.”

Last Boss blinks a few times, knuckles turning white as he balled up his fists.

“...show me the baby,” the quiet man finally speaks up.

“At this stage, there isn’t a baby yet. There’s not even a fetus.”

“Then how are you sure that she was pregnant?”

The doctor fishes something out of her pocket, and hands it to the tall, quiet man. “It’s a pregnancy test. Look here,” she points to the two lines. “Two lines means positive.”

This time, Aguni expresses his skepticism. “But she was dead by the time you took this test. How do we know this is accurate?”

With a patient gaze, Sunohara continues explaining. “I was an obstetrician-gynecologist before I came here. The pregnancy hormone hCG can remain in a patient’s system from one to nine weeks after a miscarriage. From the levels we got from her urine, she’s been pregnant for about two weeks.”

Neither of them asked any more questions after that. The tattooed militant’s gaze is fixated on the positive test, mouth agape from disbelief.

Sunohara clears her throat. “I’m sorry. I… I’m sorry for your loss. When you’re ready, you can come pick her body up later. Excuse me, I need a smoke.”

Sunohara walks away, leaving the militants stunned at the revelation.

Both are at a loss for words. Aguni is trying to come up with something to say, while Last Boss’ thoughts are racing a mile a minute.

What would’ve happened if Yamaneko survived, and found out about her pregnancy? Takatora never even thought of having children, but he wonders what their child would look like. Would that child take after its mother, inheriting her dreamy eyes, small nose, and short height? Or would it take after him, and get his long limbs, pronounced nose, and sullen gaze?

But Niragi had touched her before he did. Did he use protection? Is it his seed that impregnated her instead? A twisted, selfish, and possessive part of him wanted it to be his, just like how he wanted Yamaneko to be his. The same twisted, selfish, and possessive part of him knew that Yamaneko would be terrified to have this child, but having it would help stake his claim on her.

Thinking about it seems so pointless now that she’s gone. Last Boss shakes the thoughts off, and focuses on his deceased lover’s last words, instead.

He’ll live free in this world without her.

Feet taking him back to his room, he gathered what’s left of Yamaneko’s belongings that hadn't been destroyed in his frenzy, and packed them in a rugged sack. That afternoon, he informs Aguni that he’ll be excusing himself from patrols, and the games. He must tend to Yamaneko’s body.

“Where will you bury her?” Aguni asks him.

“I won’t. I’ll burn her, near the place where I found her.”

“I’ll drive you there,” Aguni offers.

Wordlessly, he nods.

As the night falls, they load Yamaneko’s body in the back of the car, and Aguni drives. In the trunk are various pieces of wood, gasoline, and the rest of Yamaneko’s things. The chief raises an eyebrow as they stop outside a laser tag arcade.

It’s the place where it all began.

Retrieving the items from the trunk, Takatora builds his lover a pyre. Aguni watches from the inside of the car, allowing him to grieve by himself. Then, Last Boss walks back to the car to retrieve his dead lover’s body, wrapped in a makeshift body bag.

With uncharacteristic gentleness, he lays her down, and unwraps her. Just a day before, she was alive and full of enthusiasm as she made love to him in the antique store; seeing her lifeless and cold makes Takatora’s breath constrict in his throat.

It’s been more than twelve hours since her death; her limbs are relaxed now. Yamaneko’s body had been cut open and sewn back shut, stitches lining her body. Her skin is cold to the touch, all of its color gone. The tiger crouches beside his wildcat, and presses his warm, trembling lips against her cold ones.

Then, he pulls away, and douses her with gasoline.

Reaching in his pocket, he retrieves a lighter, and sets her ablaze.

The flames lick her skin, and he watches. One by one, he throws in the rest of Yamaneko’s possessions; fragments of the sewing machine, her sewing kit containing all her threads and needles, assorted pieces of stationery, various makeup, the positive pregnancy stick, and finally, her beloved jacket. Before he throws the last item in, he presses it against his face, taking in her scent one last time.

After those had been tossed in the flame, he reaches inside his pocket again, and takes out all the photographs he took of her just the day before.

Takatora has no need for the obscene pictures Yamaneko allowed him to take; it’ll only remind his body of what he had lost. They burned to a crisp as the flames touched them.

Then, he gets to the last two photographs. His favorites.

The enigmatic militant didn’t even notice the warm tear that landed on the picture of his lover’s smiling face.

Takatora adds that to the burning pile, as well.

Lastly, he takes out Yamaneko’s letter to him, and reads it again one last time, this time doing so out loud.

Smoke rose to the heavens, and the fire roared into the night, drowning out his voice.

Last Boss only got worse after that night. He killed with no remorse, and faced the game with no fear of dying, staying true to who he is, and to Yamaneko’s final words to him.

Some days later, the unthinkable happened.

With the Hatter dead, the Beach is falling apart. Aguni takes the helm, and the last numbered Heart game finally commences within the Beach grounds. As the announcement blares over the hotel’s speakers, Last Boss goes to the table to pick up a phone, which lights up and recognizes his face. The lobby is getting crowded, anxious players passing each other phones to prepare for the biggest, deadliest game yet.

It’s a witch-hunt of some sort. Burn the witch that killed the dead girl lying on the lobby floor.

As the people babbled about their theories about the witch, Last Boss grew impatient.

His past experiences proved again and again that the best solution is the most straightforward one.

So when one girl points her finger to the militant sect, Last Boss comes behind her, and plunges his katana through her chest. Several bystanders jumped away from the scene, mortified. The tattooed militant withdraws his blade, and opens his mouth to speak, a mad glint in his eye.

“How troublesome. Let’s just burn everyone we find.”

Across him, Niragi’s newest toy, some girl that arrived at the Beach days ago, looks at him with a horrified expression. The murmurs quiet down as the chief approaches, addressing the crowd. Last Boss didn’t even pay attention to what he said. The moment Niragi fires his gun, he joins the fray, killing anyone who got in the way.

Chaos erupts in the Beach. People ran, some hid like rats in their rooms. They need to be lured out, and Last Boss knows just how to do it. Niragi speaks to him through a walkie-talkie while he dragged canisters of fuel and kicked them over the storage room’s floor.

Flames erupt as he tosses his lit lighter to the floor. In the fire, he sees Yamaneko; her cold, dead body to be exact. He pulls his hood down, blinks a few times, and ultimately chooses to turn around and continue the witch hunt.

That night, he didn’t know that he’d be meeting her again so soon.

Last Boss woke up from a dazed state in a burning room, inhaling thick black smoke. He recalls the moments before he lost consciousness, and remembers going against a formidable foe; a woman trained in martial arts who managed to defeat him, and render him unconscious. Silently, he thanked that woman for paving the way for him. Thanks to her, he’s one step closer to finally facing death.

Ordinary people wouldn’t understand people like Last Boss, who embraced it. To him, this world is the one in its true form, without the illusions of civilization. Not even his own mother would have understood his philosophy.

But Yamaneko did.

And as the carbon monoxide-laden smoke continues to fill his lungs, Takatora sees her walking towards him, healthy and hale with her pretty smile, just like in the photograph he had burned weeks ago. There’s a slight bulge on her belly, made obvious in her usual Beach outfit.

“I didn’t expect you to follow so soon,” she greets him, sitting next to him in the burning building. “I’ve missed you so much, Tora.” His lover pats her belly. “We were waiting for you.”

“Yamaneko.”

Even in the foul smoke, he can smell her scent, and even in the blazing heat, her warmth is greater.

“Are you afraid?” she asks him, holding his hand.”

“No. I’ll embrace death.”

“Did you get to live freely?”

“Yes. I’m freer than I ever was.”

“Are you ready?” Yamaneko asks as she leans her head against his shoulder.

“I’m ready.”

Kissing him gently, Yamaneko sits in his lap. “Return to the soil with me, Tora.”

“I’ll be happy to.”

“I love you,” Yamaneko whispers, before closing her eyes.

Takatora closes his eyes, grateful for all the experiences he had in this beautiful world.

“I love you.”

Author’s Notes 2: Well, writing this was a journey. Hopefully I did the canon characters some justice, especially Last Boss. Imagining a character like him having a love interest is challenging, and this was fun to write. The last two chapters were taxing to write due to the research I put in about poisons, venomous snakes, and other medical stuff, but it was worth it!

I've debated for months on whether I should give them a happy ending... but in the end, the angst won out. Thank you for reading, and thank you for sticking with our dormouse-turned-wildcat anti villain protagonist till the end.

[captain-kingliamsqueen]

With a Heavy Heart

I LOVE YOUR READING YOUR FEEDBACK SO DONT HESITATE TO LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! <3

Pairing: Liam x Riley 

possibly a series...you’ll have to wait and see!

Summary: …Riley sick and tired of the way she is treated by madeleine, what will she do about it?

Word Count: 2,476

Tagged : @starstruckzonkoperatorbat  @drakelover78  @queencatherynerhys @devineinterventions2 @jayjay879  @kawairinrin  @hopefulmoonobject @flyawayblue56  @gardeningourmet  @blackcatkita  @syltti78  @diamond-dreamland  @theroyalweisme  @hhiggs  @mfackenthal  @bruteforcebears @pens-girl-87 @barbaravalentino @umccall71 @darley1101 @crookedslimecreatorpasta @jamjar84 @starstruckpixelberryhistoryvoid 

 ASK IF YOU WANT TAGGED! SORRY IF I MISSED ANYONE! (USED THE TAGS FROM MY “ALWAYS” SERIES LET ME KNOW IF ANYONE WANTS UNTAGGED!!!)

I always notice every single spelling mistake or issue after I’ve posted…so apologies in advance! 

 “How dare you ask me to do that!? I will not be your mistress Liam!” Riley loudly whispered trying not to wake anyone from their sleep, how dare he ask her to do that, she would never do something like that! It Riley's first night back at court, her first time seeing Liam since the coronation.

“Riley, please calm dow-”

“calm down!? BOY YOU MUST BE CRAZY! TELLING ME TO CALM DOWN! I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE MAD AT YOU LIAM RHYS!”

“Riley! Please!”

“you are engaged to madeleine, it may not be what is in your heart Liam, but you are still engaged!”

“Riley, please, hear me out! I didn’t ask you to be my mistress, I would never ask you to do that, and that fact that you think I would hurts, all I’m saying is that madeleine knows I don’t love her, and she doesn’t care, she doesn’t care if we see each other, we can still be together, just until we figure this whole thing out! I’m not saying let’s throw our clothes off and jump into bed…let’s play hide the goddamn sausage!!” Liam bellowed in a hushed tone Liam pinched the bridge of his nose as he tried to calm himself down. “all I mean is that we can spend time together”

“but we have to do it in secret…we have to sneak around again! I don’t want to spend my life sneaking around Liam!” she cried “I have laid everything out for you! Liam, I know you were going to pick me at the coronation ball, I know that you’re in the middle of this too…but its hurts, having to sneak around with the man I’m in love with, not being able to interact with him properly in case anyone sees us or speculates something” she turned her back to him to avoid him seeing the tears running down her face. Riley looked up towards the ceiling to try and stop the tears from falling.

Riley sighed as she heard Liam step forward then she felt his hands gently holding her waist as he placed a gentle kiss on her head “I know it’s not your fault Liam…I know that” she whispered softly “it’s just a lot to deal with…”

“I never wanted to hurt you Riley, that’s why I chose madeleine, to keep you safe but ultimately it just hurt you more and I will spend the rest of my life apologising for that”

“no, I don’t want you to do that, you were thinking about my safety Liam, no one can fault you for that…I just wish you had consulted me first, I don’t want you to blame yourself for our predicament Liam, I don’t blame you, so neither should you. I need you to remember that…you have been raised to deal with most situations in court, you have been taught not to show your honest feelings when they aren’t required, I wear my heart on my sleeve Liam, if I love something or someone, I show them, I show everyone, you see it in my face, in the way I act, I wasn’t taught the way you were its physically and mentally draining trying to hide everything, I always seem to be the one that gets hurt Liam and I don’t know how much longer I can spend sneaking around, getting hurt, I know its unintentional believe me I do, but you still hurt me.” She sighed

“I know, I love you Riley, I love you so damn much, I need you to know that, I need you to tell me that you know that.”

“I do, I know you do Liam”

“then I hope you will accept my apology Riley and I hope that you know that I would never intentionally hurt you”

“I know that” she whispered “I think I need to be alone right now Liam...I just need to let myself calm down…”

“okay…as you wish, I love you so much!” he whispered defeated

“goodnight riley” he whispered before gently placing a kiss on the back of her head. Then headed out of the bedroom and making his way to his own on the other side of madeleines property.

As Liam reached his rom door, his phone pinged, he sighed then pulled it from his pocket, smiling as he read the message he had received.

When Riley awoke the next day, she pulled herself from her bed, stumbling tiredly into the bathroom to shower, then she dressed, just as she finished pulling her shoes on there was a knock at her door, she smiled knowing it was Maxwell. She opened then door smiling to be greeted with his usual grin.

“good morning!!” he smirked

“good morning max” she chuckled

“so, are you ready for the garden party?”

“physically yes…mentally not so much” she sighed

“don’t worry, I’ll be with you the whole time”

“thank you max”

The two headed out to the garden where they were met with hundreds of nobles. As Riley walked out she caught madeleines glare across the path. Riley watched as a smirk fell onto madeleines face as she stared her dead in the eye, she reached her hand down, linking her hand with Liam's.

“Riley…are you okay?” Maxwell asked full of concern

“yeah…yes, I’m fine, let’s find our table” she mumbled then headed for the table where Drake and Hana sat.

It was about an hour later when Riley headed into the grand hall with Hana to make their way to the bathroom, madeleine approached them with a smile on her face.

“lady Hana, lady Riley, how very nice of you to join us”

“thank you for having us” Hana replied politely

“oh, it’s no problem, king Liam and I are happy you are here to celebrate our engagement with us”

“of course, we wouldn’t miss it for anything…” Riley stated begrudgingly.

“I hope you enjoyed the food, we do like to keep our dogs well fed” madeleine smirked

“how da-”

“lady Kayliegh, lady Hana” Liam called smiling as he approached

“I noticed your trainings been going well lady riley” madeleine stated

“training?!” Riley raised her voice a little knowing there was no one else in the room.

“yes, your training, we train our dogs well in Cordonia…very obedient to orders from their masters”

“madeleine!” Liam warned

“you know madeleine, you don’t act like a queen, no one will respect you if you treat everyone like shit! And when the crown goes down, it will be your fault…Liam…he has been the perfect kind, but you…my god, you just drag the monarchy down, he’s trying to lift the spirits but you, you’re just dragging that lovely golden ground through the dirt, so I cannot wait to see the whole of Cordonia turn on you! Because you know…that’s what happens when owners don’t treat their dogs right!”

“I am the queen in waiting! You will not speak to me like that!”

“hah! Queen in waiting…yeah you’ll be waiting a long damn time!” Riley laughed

“I wish Cordonia luck with you as their queen, it’s a good thing Liam's there to fix all the shit you’re going to cause”

“enough! Both of you, do not make a scene in front of the nobility!” Liam stated

“maybe there wouldn’t be a scene Liam, if this bitch would just wind her fucking neck in! I don’t care who the hell she is, if she can hand it out she can damn well take it back!”

“that is your king and you will address him as such!”

“madeleine! Leave it! There are guests outside, waiting to talk with you!” Liam sighed

“ahh my soon to be subjects, I should get going, but I’m sure you can find your way back to the kennels that you came from! Maybe you should put yourself on a plane and go back to the dump you came from! Maybe you can get your waitressing job back…that’s really all your good for isn’t it lady Riley…serving those better than you! That must be why people have been calling you the kings mistress…because you serve him in ways you shouldn’t!” she smirked as she walked past Riley, bumping her shoulder as she went.

“Riley…” Liam reached out to take Riley's hand, she pulled her hand away from him, them stormed out of the room.

“Riley…” he repeated as he walked after her, as they reached the corridor Liam had caught up to her, he took her hand gently, stopping her from walking away.

“Rile-” Liam stopped himself as Riley turned and he seen her tear stained cheeks

“I will deal with her…I promise, that was unacceptable the way she spoke to you, she shouldn’t be speaking to anyone like that!”

“I am sick and tired of being her punching bag!!” she bellowed “don’t you see Liam…just by her being the queen in waiting…the way she treats everyone…she’s dragging the crown through the dirt! I will not sit back and let her degrade me anymore Liam! I don’t care who she is…she could be the queen of England! I don’t give a fuck! She has no right to speak to me the way she just did…I’m sick of all the snide remarks and digs, the bumps of the shoulder as she passes me! I will not just sit by and let her talk to me like that!”

“I know, and I can’t expect you to.”

“she’s a bully! A damn bully Liam!!, god, I just…I can’t deal with her! I need to be alone right now…I need to think” Riley mumbled then removed her hand from Liam's and headed down to her room.

Once the door shut behind her, she let out a loud scream. She threw the vase from the chest of drawers next to her at the wall causing it to smash everywhere! She fell to her knees as her hands shot up to her face, she broke down.

It was that evening that she spoke to Liam again, when he turned up at her room door after everyone else had gone to bed. He sighed as she answered the door and he was met with bloodshot eyes. Riley stepped aside to let him in, he stopped dead in his tracks when he was met with two packed suitcases.

“where are you going?”

“anywhere but here” she mumbled

“Riley…please don’t go, ive spoken to madeleine, ive warned her”

“I can’t stay Liam…I just can’t” she sighed as shuffled around the room, refusing to stop and look at him.

“Riley please just stop, and talk to me”

“what do you want me to say Liam…there’s nothing else to say…my cards have been dealt and they don’t look good! I must go, I’m sorry but…it’s just the way it is” she sniffled as she wiped her nose.

“Riley, stop and look at me, please”

“I can’t! Liam! I can’t stop and look at you…because if I do…ill cave! I love you so god damn much that I have to leave you…I love you with everything in me, from the bottom of my heart Liam” she cried “but I can’t stay and sit on the side line!”

“Riley please…I’m begging you…don’t go” she cried even more as she heard the crack in his voice.

“Liam…I don’t want to leave you…but I have to…I have to go!” as Riley walked past him, he took her hand and pulled her to his chest, holding her as tight as he could.

“I don’t know what I would do if you left Riley…please don’t go, I need you here…you have been my rock through all of this Riley…” she turned her head to the side, to avoid looking at the tears falling down Liam's face.

“look at me Riley, I need you to stay.”

“I can’t” she cried as her hand lifted to her face

“please just look at me” Liam whispered, Riley turned to face him, as he rested his head against hers, the tears cascaded down their cheeks.

“I can’t do this without you…” he cried “please stay…don’t go…don’t leave me” he cried as he placed soft pecks on her lips.

“I’m sorry Liam, I love you, I love you so much”

“I love you Riley…more than you could ever know”

“I know…I love you too…so much”

There was a gentle knock at the door, then Bastian's voice was heard

“your Majesty, its getting late” Bastian informed them just loud enough for them to hear.

“I-I can’t walk out of this room Riley…I can’t leave here, not knowing if I’ll ever see you again”

“Liam…”

“promise me…promise me that you’ll at least come to the ball tomorrow night? one last time…I just need to see you one last time…”

“okay…”

“promise me…promise me you won’t go without saying goodbye…”

“I promise” she whispered. Liam pulled her into the most passionate love filled kiss the two had ever shared.

“I love you riley”

“I love you too” Liam quickly gave her a kiss before wiping his eyes and headed out of the room, looking back as he closed the door behind him.

“your Majesty is everything alright?”

“not in the slightest Bastian…not in the slightest.”

The next day when Riley awoke, she didn’t attend breakfast, she didn’t have much of an appetite knowing what the day ahead of her looked like.

Throughout the morning and early afternoon, Riley went over the whole room making sure she didn’t forget anything. It reached 4 o’clock when Riley sat down at her table, she pulled out a pen and paper from the drawer along with a small envelope.

My dearest Liam,

It is with a heavy heart that I write you this letter, I know you’re going to hate me for the this, but I couldn’t bare the thought of saying goodbye, I couldn’t stand in front of you and tell you, I don’t know when ill see you again, by the time you get this letter, ill already be gone. I’m sorry I had to be like this in the end. It kills me to leave you, it really does, I love with you with all my heart Liam, and I always will, you will always have the key to my heart no matter what happens, no matter where I am I will always be thinking about you. We may not be together in person Liam, but I spirit I will always be by your side as will you be by mine. Maybe, one day we’ll see each other again, so I won’t say goodbye…I’ll say see you later, I love you so much, never forget it, I know in my heart that you and I are meant for each other, even though we will be apart, your name will always rumble in the beating of my heart.

I love you, forever

All my Love

Riley <3