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zepskies · 1 year ago

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Take Me Home - Part 9

Pairing: Beau Arlen x F. Reader

Summary: You are another lost soul at Sunny Day Excursions. You’re aiming to settle in Helena, Montana, where Beau Arlen is the new sheriff in town. But you’ve both got a past you’re running from.

AN: We’ve made it, friends. 🥹 But stay tuned, I have a special announcement after the end of this chapter.~

Word Count: 4.1K

Tags/Warnings: Fluff, angst, hurt/comfort

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Part 9: A Choice to Make

There was a man in your bed.

You were pleased to discover that, although your kidnapping of two days ago hadn’t been a dream, being held warm and secure in someone’s arms this morning wasn’t either.

After slowly blinking awake, you looked up from a familiar freckled shoulder to find Beau’s peaceful face. His hair was a floppy mess, his mouth parted in sleep. It made you smile.

His arm was heavy around your waist. It was nice, but you contemplated how you were going to get over to the bathroom and freshen up; maybe fix your hair, brush your teeth, put a little makeup on…

You were careful in how you grasped his hand. You were about to try and peel his arm off without waking him.

“If my alarm hasn’t gone off, means it ain’t morning yet,” Beau rumbled with his eyes still closed.

You stifled a laugh, but you tried again to pull his arm away. He held you to him tighter.

“Where you think you’re goin’?” he asked. His southern drawl was thicker when he was sleepy.

You giggled lightly and rested back against his bare chest in defeat.

“Was gonna try and fix myself up a little, before you saw me in the raw light of day,” you confessed.

You’d caught a glimpse of the yellowing bruise on your cheek last night in the bathroom mirror. It wasn’t a pretty sight. You weren’t really sure how Beau could see past it.

But at your words, Beau finally cracked his eyes open. He made a show of glancing up and down your body, clad in just your black silk camisole. He couldn’t see the rest of you under the blankets, but what he did see, he liked quite a lot—aside from the parts of you that were still healing.

“You look just right to me,” he remarked, tugging at a strand of your wild, likely knotted hair. “Damn beautiful too.”

Your smile of amusement grew, along with your blush.

“Flatterer,” you accused. Though you rolled off his arm, fearing you were cutting off his circulation. You moved onto his chest instead, where he held you by your waist and you rested your head over his steady-beating heart.

“Nope. That’s the truth, darlin’,” he said, with a deep sigh. You didn’t see the way his eyes closed in contentment. He knew he’d have to get back into work today, not to mention check on Emily and Carla. For now though, he could focus on this. On you.

“Where do we go from here?” you asked. It was a mere whisper against his skin, but he heard you just fine. It was a good question.

“Eggs or pancakes?” he posed.

You smiled, but you shoved at his shoulder.

“You know what I mean,” you said wryly.

Beau’s resulting deep breath raised you as well. He nodded, brushing your hair back away from your face. You pushed up enough to look up at him.

He gave you a quirking smile.

“I want this to stick,” he admitted. “I wanna take you on a proper date and make it official.”

You smiled back at him. “I’d like that.”

“Okay,” he nodded. “We’re in agreement.”

But you didn’t realize that anything official would take more time than either of you thought.

Two weeks later, you returned to the precinct with another basket, this one full of snickerdoodle cookies for the whole squad. Poppernak was especially excited when you handed them over to him.

Beau must’ve heard your voice, because he came out of his office to greet you with a broad smile.

“Well, hey there,” he said. You went to him with a smile of your own, but you waited until he’d led you into his office by the small of your back.

Once he shut the door behind him, he pulled you close by the waist and greeted you with a proper kiss. You didn’t even mind the scratch of his beard against your chin. You just caressed his cheek and met him with as much as he gave.

But all too soon, the kiss dimmed to embers, your lips parting softly from his. He thumbed at your cheek.

“To what do I owe this little visit?” he asked.

“Nothing really,” you said. He sat on the edge of his desk, and you followed him, standing between his legs. His hand stayed comfortable on your hip. You toyed with the top button near his collar.

“Fall semester is starting up in a couple of weeks. I don’t have too much of the summer left,” you said. “I’m trying to be ready but…I don’t know.”

You were a bit nervous about it. After the ordeal of this past month, you’d started seeing a therapist to work through some of that trauma. Sometimes you had nightmares, found it hard to focus on things during the day. You worried that it would affect your work once your classes started up.

Beau knew what that thinly veiled worry in your eyes meant; you’d confided in him after your first therapy session a few days ago. He had been supportive, and even somewhat open to your suggestion that he see a professional himself, for the things he still held deep inside.

“The rocky summer’s almost over,” he encouraged, squeezing your hip. “You’re gonna do great, sweetheart.”

You thanked him with a smile, though your fingers became more gripping on his shirt.

“There is something else that’s kinda bothering me,” you said.

Beau grabbed your hand and held it. “What’s that?”

You leveled him with a knowing look.

“I’m just curious on what we’re doing exactly,” you said. “Considering you still haven’t asked me out ‘officially official.’”

Beau’s lips pressed together with a guilty sort of smile.

“Okay, yes, I’ve been working on that,” he said.

You laughed incredulously. “What’s to work on? It’s a simple question. I promise you, I have a simple answer.”

“But it’s not quite that simple,” he said. That made you pause, along with the sobered look on his face. You slipped your hand out of his and crossed your arms.

“What do you mean, Beau?” you asked.

He grasped your arms gently and let out a deep breath.

“Okay. I just talked with Carla last night,” he said.

It wasn’t a great way to kick things off if he wanted to reassure you. He seemed to know that, and so he spoke quickly.

“After everything that’s happened, she’s thinking of selling the house and taking Emily back to Houston,” he said.

Your face fell with shock. You laid a hand on his chest; to steady him or yourself, you didn’t know which.

“Oh wow,” you uttered.

“Yeah,” he nodded. He dragged a hand over his mouth. You had a feeling this news had been keeping him up at night.

But, you had to voice a thought that began to make your stomach churn with unease.

“Are you…would you move back too?” you asked.

Beau met your gaze with a conflicted one of his own.

“Besides the fact that I got a lot of ghosts in Houston, there are important reasons why I should stay. Why I want to stay,” he said. He picked up your hand again and held it with both of his. “But I also want and need to be there for my daughter.”

You nodded, even as tears burned in your eyes. You knew how hard this time was for Emily right now. What she needed was stability. She needed her father.

“I don’t know what to do here,” Beau admitted.

It was hard, but you breathed through your upset and tried to reign in your tears. You met his gaze and squeezed his hand back.

“You know what I want,” you said, “but you need to do what you think is best. Both for Emily, and for yourself.”

“That’s not an easy question to answer,” he said.

You shook your head. “It might not be, but that’s where we are.”

Your eyes fell to your joined hands, until Beau propped a finger under your chin, guiding your face back up to his. He gave you a kiss that was supposed to be sweet, and comforting.

He only succeeded for the moment.

“Oh God, it’s like I don’t even know you!” you exclaimed. Though you were still laughing.

Beau raised a finger in protest. “Hey, I stand by pineapple on pizza—”

“Alone, Dad. You stand alone,” Emily said. She had a recorder app going on her phone, placed between the three of you in your living room. This marked Episode 1 of her podcast, and already it was going off the rails.

“It ain’t that bad. That’s all I’m saying,” he laughed, holding up placating hands. “Pizza is pizza.”

“Said the human garbage disposal,” you smirked. “Where do you put that one, in your second or third stomach?”

“Nah, the fourth one,” he said, patting said stomach. “It’s got the most room. Very handy at a buffet. Or at Donno’s diner when he puts out the weekly specials.”

You laughed. Beau grinned. Emily made a face of disgust.

“Okay, gross,” she said. “Moving on to the next question.”

“How many you got there anyway?” Beau asked, reaching for the piece of paper she’d printed off with all of these “Questions for Couples.” He’d caught sight of a few spicy ones on there that he’d rather not be asked by his daughter, let alone put on record.

Emily snatched the paper away before he could take it from her.

“Okay, next. What’s the first thing you noticed about each other when you met?” she read off.

You and Beau glanced at each other with curious smiles. That was something neither of you had talked about just yet.

“How about for you?” Emily directed her question at you first. You blinked wider eyes.

“Oh! Um…” you trailed. Beau crossed his arms, adopting a sly, expectant smile. You bit your lip to avoid laughing in embarrassment.

“Okay, well, as you know, we met on that camping trip. If I remember right, I saw him from behind first,” you recalled.

“Liked what you saw, huh?” he teased. You laughed and tried not to blush in embarrassment.

“I noticed how tall he was. I wondered if a mountain man was coming to join us,” you quipped. Beau’s smile kicked up a notch. “But it wasn’t until he turned around, and I saw his handsome face…for me, it was his eyes.”

You were a bit bashful to admit that, but when you looked over at Beau, said handsome face had softened a touch. His hand snuck behind you to settle at the curve of your waist, stroking a thumb along your back.

“And for you, Dad?” Emily asked.

You shot him an expectant look. Beau cleared his throat, looking between his daughter and back to you. Then his smile returned.

“Well, I noticed right off the bat that she was beautiful, of course.”

“Good answer,” Emily nodded, laughing a little. You couldn’t help blushing.

Beau slipped his hand off your waist to come up and brush your cheek instead.

“For me though, it was her smile that did me in,” he said. “She looked up at me, and I uh…yeah. That got me. Was thinking about her for a while after Cassie and I left the camp.”

With that admission, you found yourself melting further. You looked down at your folded hands in your lap, trying to save face, but Beau wouldn’t have it. He took one of your hands in his, brought it up to his lips, and pressed a kiss over your knuckles, making your face warm up further.

Emily watched you both in amusement. She smirked at the next question listed on the page.

“Okay, who pays on dates? Is it Dad every time?” she asked.

Your expression turned dry as you glanced at Beau.

“Well, I wouldn’t know, considering we haven’t been on a real date yet,” you remarked.

Beau gave a tight smile.

“All right,” he said. “Next question, please.”

A couple of days later, you crossed paths with Carla by chance while you were getting office supplies. She was getting moving boxes. There was a stack of them in her cart.

After exchanging some painful small talk, you heeded a gut instinct that had you offering to buy her lunch. So the two of you went to a café in the same plaza, where you each had a sandwich and fries.

“Can I ask you something?” you said.

Carla smiled, taking another fry. “You mean can you ask me something uncomfortable?”

You stifled an awkward laugh. She really was a good lawyer.

“Yeah, that,” you said.

“Sure,” she replied.

You stared back at her for a moment, steeling yourself. You both knew what this was about to be. It was a conversation weeks in the making, but it didn’t make it any easier to begin.

You decided to peel off the Band-Aid.

“Do you still love him?” you asked. You knew you didn’t have to specify whom. Carla sighed and set down her iced tea.

“In a way,” she replied. “I’ll always care about Beau, and I want him to be happy, I do. This has all just been…too much.”

“I understand that,” you said.

Carla hid it well, but there was pain behind her eyes as she looked away. Your heart broke for her a bit. She’d barely been remarried a year before this hellish summer uprooted her entire life.

Now she and her daughter were living in a big empty house that was meant to be for three. Carla had just finished telling you about her plans to sell it, but that also implied that she and Emily were moving.

“Part of this is my fault, I know,” said Carla. “I’m the one who married a man like Avery—”

You gently stopped her with a hand on her wrist. You met her gaze with empathy.

“What he did, and what happened after, that wasn’t your fault,” you said. “I know what it’s like to be with a man who lies.”

It took her a moment, but Carla accepted that with a slow nod. You took your hand back, and once again, you tried to gain your courage to dive into deeper waters.

“I also understand that you have to do what you feel is right for Emily, but…”

Carla met you with a more wry tilt of her head. “Let me guess. You don’t think we should leave Montana?”

Your gaze fell. “I know it’s not really my place to say—”

“And if it was?” she countered.

Your lips pressed together. Well, if she wanted to hear your opinion, then she would have it.

“Look, Carla, I was with Emily through the worst of it,” you said. “I know very well what she’s been through. But another out-of-state move when she’d just started getting acclimated, possibly separating her from her father, is that the right call?”

“You’re assuming Beau would stay. For you?” Carla asked. Her words were pointed. Sharp enough to cut you.

“I won’t lie. I don’t want to lose him…but despite his responsibilities here as Sheriff, I suspect he might leave if you asked him to. If it was for his daughter,” you said. Letting out a breath, you looked down at your folded hands on the table. “I love Emily. I want him to do what’s right for her. But selfishly, I want him to take care of himself too.”

Carla considered that, and you, with a nod.

The two of you continued sipping your iced teas for a while in silence.

When you asked for the check, the server informed you that Carla had already paid for it.

The woman gave you a parting smile before she left. You weren’t sure if she’d done it to treat you, or just to win.

That same night, Carla invited Beau over for dinner with her and Emily. It was pizza Friday, like they used to do as a family.

It was familiar, but different now.

They all were different.

Carla asked them to join her in the living room afterwards, with Emily sitting in a lounge chair while her parents sat on the couch. Beau wasn’t sure what Carla was up to, but he was going along with it.

She took in a deep breath, folding her hands in her lap, and focused on her daughter.

“Em, I need to ask you something.”

The girl looked confused, and a little apprehensive at this point.

“O-kay…”

“I know this past month has been…hard for all of us,” said Carla. “Especially for you, sweetheart.”

She took Emily’s hand.

“You know I think it’s best that we go back to Houston,” said Carla. Emily dimmed at that, and her mother could see it. It pained Carla inside to come to a realization…

“But, I think maybe I made that decision for me, not for you,” she said. She had to blink back the sting of tears. “So, what I’m asking is, do you want to go…or do you want to stay here in Montana?”

Beau glanced over at his ex-wife in surprise. He’d never known Carla to change her mind on anything. But now, now he had hope.

He tried not to show any of that to his daughter though. This was up to her now, and he would support whatever she said next.

“R-Really? I get to choose?” Emily asked. She had the beginnings of tears in her eyes as she looked between her parents.

Carla nodded, attempting a smile through her own tears. “Yes. I, and I’m sure your father, want to do what’s best for you here. What do you want to do?”

Emily considered the question. Yeah, she missed her friends back at school in Houston. They still texted and kept in touch through social media all the time, but she knew it wasn’t the same.

She hadn’t been happy about moving to Montana at first…but after meeting Cassie and Denise, helping them with their cases—it made Emily feel like she was doing work that mattered. That something she did really, truly mattered, and would help people. That was a cool feeling.

Also, she’d met you. She’d begun to find a kind of older sister in you. Someone who encouraged her projects and her creative side without thinking it was too weird, or too annoying. And of course, she could see what you meant to her dad now.

Besides all that though, she just had this gut feeling. Like going back to Houston would be like going backwards.

Emily’s lower lip wobbled. She tried to stop it, but her emotions bubbled over.

“I like it here,” she admitted. “I…I want to stay.”

Beau welcomed his daughter over into a warm hug between them on the couch. Carla rubbed her back and nodded.

“Okay,” she said. “Then we’ll do that.”

They stayed like that for a while. Until eventually, the teen wanted to go back to editing her podcast. She was getting a hang of the editing software, and she wanted to post it online by the end of the week.

“Okay, but I want to hear the final cut before that gets released into cyberspace,” Beau called after her when she ran off into her room.

Carla shook her head and wiped her face dry.

“I still can’t believe you let her record you,” she said with a laugh.

“You and me both,” Beau admitted. If you hadn’t cajoled him into it, he probably wouldn’t have.

And the thought of you had him smiling to himself, more warmly. He’d couldn’t wait to call you…but no, this was something he should tell you in person. He turned to Carla.

“You’re sure about this? About staying?” he asked.

She nodded with a sigh. “We’ll just downsize to a smaller house. Though I will need you to keep sharing more of the custody responsibilities with Emily, presuming you’re able to get out of that trailer of yours.”

Beau wanted to argue that there was nothing wrong with his trailer (sure, it was a bit small. They’d been managing just fine). But as to not look a gift horse-in-the-mouth, all he did was nod in agreement.

“I’ll work on that,” he said.

“Thank you. Beau, I’m grateful for you,” Carla said. Her eyes were honest. “You gave me our daughter. And I’m glad you’ve gotten better, that you’ve been able to work through some of your issues. I think your girlfriend has had something to do with that.”

A smile quirked at Beau’s lips, and he nodded.

“That she has,” he said.

After his shift the following day, Beau met you at the end of your painting lesson at the local art studio. Everyone was starting to pack up their painting supplies. He managed to come up from behind and surprise you.

He tapped you on one shoulder, but appeared on your other side, pressing a kiss to your cheek. He laughed in light of your gasp.

“Hey, baby,” he greeted.

You narrowed your eyes at him in amusement.

“Hey, yourself,” you replied. “Good timing! I just finished.”

While you gathered up your supplies, Beau admired your latest painting that was still drying on the canvas. He whistled lowly.

It was a landscape of Mount Helena. There was mist near its mountain peaks, and dense trees at its base, and wide plains of green, dotted by a couple of horses ranging free.

You swiveled toward him in your chair and looked up at him with a smile. The same one that caught his eye when he met you.

“After everything, everything, I don’t regret coming here,” you said. Your voice shook a little, and your eyes shone with emotion. You stood from your seat and slipped your hand into his. “This is still the place where I got the courage to start over. And it’s where I met you.”

Beau’s face softened.

“So no matter what you decide to do,” you said, “I won’t ever regret knowing you, Beau Arlen.”

His own smile crinkled the corners of his eyes then. He swept a gentle thumb across your cheek.

“I came to tell you that Carla and Emily are staying in Montana,” he said. “So am I.”

You sucked in a trembling breath. Your tears bubbled over and fell, but his hands were there to catch them, framing your face.

“But aside from all that,” he said, with a note of humor gleaming in his eyes. “I’d really, really, like to ask you out to dinner tonight. Call it ‘officially official.’”

You laughed and smiled so bright. You nodded and let him pull you into a warm embrace. He just surprised you by hefting you into his arms next. You yelped and clung to his shoulders.

Your art instructor, as well as a couple of lesson goers remaining in the studio, clapped and whooped and laughed at the way he started carrying you towards the exit.

“Wait, wait, go back! My stuff!” you said, gesturing at your workstation.

Beau graciously backed up so you could grab your bag of paint supplies and your canvas from the easel. It was a little awkward, but you both laughed as he tried to angle you out the door of the studio. He started walking you down the sidewalk.

“Where’re you taking me? My car’s that way,” you pointed in the opposite direction.

“I believe I asked you to dinner,” said Beau, with a teasing grin. “I don’t wanna waste no time.”

You wanted to point out that your hands were stained with paint, and you weren’t dressed for a date in your jeans and plain sweater, and this wasn’t exactly what you meant by asking you out…but maybe you didn’t need a “color-coded list” for everything.

Maybe you could let yourself be a little spontaneous for once.

“Okay, Beau,” you breathed a laugh, and rested your head on his shoulder. “Take me wherever you want.”

“Oh, don’t you worry,” he said slyly. He kissed your forehead. “I’ve got plans for you.”

When he reached the passenger side of his truck, he set you down on your feet. He unlocked it and held the door open while you set down your things. You pivoted on your heel and grabbed the front of his shirt, so you could pull him down to you for a kiss.

He tasted like the promise of good days to come.

AN: And there we have it, friends. 🥹 I truly hope you enjoyed the ride on this series. I've had so much fun exploring Beau and this version of him and the reader. I hope you'll let me know what you think of the finale here. 💓

But, their story's not quite over yet.

Read the Sequel: A Good Man Is Hard to Find

Summary: When Beau starts pulling away from you and Emily during a very difficult case, will the pressure make or break your relationship?

▶️ Keep Reading: A Good Man Is Hard to Find

Ko-Fi Me ☕

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#A Choice to Make #Take Me Home #Part 9 #Beau Arlen series #big sky #beau arlen #beau arlen x reader #beau arlen x female reader #Emily Arlen #beau arlen x you #Jensen Ackles characters #big sky season 3 #beau arlen smut #Denise Brisbane #Jenny Hoyt #Cassie Dewell #zepskies writes

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obedientboymeow · 26 days ago

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Tingles

18+ mdni!!

This post will kinda describe this feeling i have as a sub, i can only kinda describe it as tingles. Long story tho..

THIS TOOK ME AN HOUR(almost 2)

Credits:

- ‘the fire works’ gif from howls moving castle I found on Pinterest

-red and purple sparkles by @anitalenia

- other red sparkles and golden ones by @bernardsbendystraws

-falling stars also from howls moving castle also from Pinterest😭

here’s the story:

So I've been very submissive in the past few months, i'm still quite new to all the ways it makes me feel. Everyday I try to explore it more and i'm having a lot of fun doing that :3.

Now one feeling that's been consistent throughout this whole journey are my 'tingles'. Its this kinda tingly feeling in my body when I feel submissive in any way. Thinking about it I've had this feeling in my childhood too and i always wondered what it was but i even knew then that i loveeeedd feeling it. When I was a kid I would sometimes feel it when a female teacher I liked would come close to explain something to me personally or give me praise for doing a good job.

Now this was rare that I felt it but it always left an impression on me, i wanted to feel it more it was sooo intoxicating. I could never pay attention when it happened tho it only happened a handful of times in my life. That is until I discovered this side of myself, I've been feeling this way a lot more lately almost every second of the day.

To explain the feeling a bit: I call it tingles. It's similar to the feeling you get from asmr this fuzzy,tingly feeling of like butterflies in your stomach or blood flowing to your face. ears or belly or whatever body part honestly. Some people have also described it as just butterflies or flutters. Feeling it makes me very fuzzy in my head and i find it hard to think and process whats happening, its quite overpowering and it makes me want to submit to whoever is giving me it.

Normally it will start in my stomach, a warm feeling. Tingly and fuzzy, circulating in my stomach making me feel very warm inside and it will kind of start making me feel physically weak like i'm melting onto whatever im laying down on like my mattress or like my consciousness is starting to slowly seep from my mind a bit too, just following the waves of tingles and pleasure. It doesn't always start in my stomach, often i will feel it in my head too. When it does start in my stomach it will spread to the rest of my body, slowly at first as the tingles crawl up my nerves like an unstoppable pulsing wave of pleasure. Relaxing whatever body part it reaches and slowly easing my mind into a state of pure pleasure and relaxation, ready to obey whoever is so grateful to make me feel this way.

I'll first explain how it spreads throughout my body before explaining how it makes my face and brain feel. So when its spreading from my stomach my heart starts beating faster and faster and when the tingles reach my chest my whole chest suddenly feels like its lit on fire with pleasure. A very warm almost ticklish feeling spreads throughout my whole chest and makes me wanna scratch my skin almost because its so overwhelmingly pleasurable. The tingles are so overwhelming that it makes it hard to breathe while my heart feels like its gonna beat out of my chest. When im feeling reaaaally tingly or teased enough the tingles go inside my heart. This is one of the most intense feelings ever, my heart feels all warm and tingly like its being kissed by 1000 pairs of soft lips every second telling me its all gonna be okay and to submit to the pleasure consuming my very soul. At this point my heart sends the tingles all throughout my body through my veins, when it reaches parts that are already tingly the tingles intensify and these places in turn become hotspots for the tingles to spread from just like my stomach and chest were.

At some point the tingles reach the tips of my fingers and my toes and the bottom of my feet, it almost feels like someone is dragging their nails softly along the sensitive areas of my skin there. Each heartbeat the tingles intensify pulsing throughout my fingers and toes like little sparkles, making me unable to use my hands and feet to move. I'll often start curling my toes as the pleasure is so extreme.

Now it either reaches my head from my stomach or it starts here, either way when it reaches my face its very intense. My face will tingle soo much and i can't help but smile and relax my jaw making my mouth open slightly. When i smile the tingles get soo much worse. I can't open my eyes or when i do they automatically close and roll back. When it reaches my brain (or it can start here ill explain later how) it reaches a melting point, the tingles run up and down the central groove of my brain. The midpoint of my brain basically becomes a highway for the tingles to run along, it feels like someone is taking a feather to the inside of my mind. This will make me squirm and whine very loudly. The tingles run back and forth, they run to the front of my face and inside my eyes and then alll the way to the back making me almost wanna slam my head backwards into my pillow. Then they'll start to run down each half of my brain and make my whole brain feel like fireworks. It's indescribable how intense it can get and at this point i'll be unable to: think, move, speak or even wake up from it sometimes.

The fireworks (how they look/feel)

At this point my veins and nervous system have become a highway for the tingles to run from the tips of my toes all the way to my brain, they pulse back and forth in waves synchronised with my heart beating and my breathing. At first i told you my heart beats fast and my breathing would also be irregular but at this point im soo relaxed that both slowed down. My lungs and heart become a source for tingles and relaxation where with each breath i sink deeper into the pleasure and let it run over my whole body like im drowining in a pool of tingles that attack my body from inside and out. Each heartbeat and breath pulling in tingles from outside straight into my body where theyll run up and down endlessly.

If i had to give the tingles a colour i'd describe them as a light red-ish colour that becomes darker the more relaxed i get. Sometimes they'll be very colourful or like a golden glow/aura radiating from my body. Sometimes they are pointy and almost like little stars shooting up and down my body, sometimes they are fluid or gas flowing through my body.

Visuals of them:

I've noticed there are several ways to give me tingles each having a different effect. Any act of submission will give me tingles, being made to submit is even worse. Forced to obey and feel insane pleasure throughout my entire soul. Petnames and namecalling is the most effective way to give me tingles, any time anyone calls me a cute name ill feel tingly and it will start the entire process ive described. The more you give me tingles the further ill fall into the stages of relaxation i've described above.

One way to start the tingles in my brain is to act like im a pet, either a puppy or kitten. Any name calling with this makes the entire thing 10 times more intense. I'll lose my mind soo quickly and fall into a deep state of relaxation where i'll often only be able to make sounds like 'hmpph' or just whimpering/whining. Being made to become a pet drives me insane and makes me fall victim to intense tingles.

How these feel:

Another way ive noticed is hypnosis, im starting to become more and more susceptible to it. I discovered this kink a while ago and at first i couldn't feel anything but deeply relaxed. These days i can fall into deep relaxation and sometimes trance if someone slowly guides me through the tingles. I've noticed when i call someone and for example after cumming or made to feel tingly in other ways, any state where i become mindless right, that i need that person to tell me to wake up or i need time to become conscious again. It's wild.. I get super relaxed and can't even talk and I dont even notice anymore that im becoming entranced into a spell of pleasure where the only things im able to think of are the tingles consuming my mind and being.

Hypnosis starts with making me feel all the stages above, making me relaxed and feeling like im sinking into my own mattress like my soul is leaving my body for a bit to let it be consumed by tingles. When i'm listening to hypnotic files it will often make my mind soo heavy, the other tingly feelings also do this but this is more intense. When i'm falling into hypnosis my entire body feels weighed down and the tingle hotspots in my brain, heart, stomach and fingers/feet become point where little anchors attach to that pull me down further into my own mind. I can feel the tingles dragging on my body as they become darker and darker until they turn a shade of purple.

Purple tingles:

The layered voices and mix of soft and hard spoken words making my mind spiral down and melt into nothingness, a pure abyss filled with purple tingles where it lies comfortable like the softest pillow on earth. The words spoken into my ears genuinely coming in as spirals too. The tingles at my hotspot points accumulating towards that spot and congealing into this blob of tingles almost like a magnet pulls all the tingles towards there as they then get pushed out in all directions again with each tingle growing in size and multiplying. Like the motion of waves pulling back before spreading again throughout my whole body as a tsunami of pleasure consumes every thought i have until all thats left is me. My raw being, my consciousness not sure if its a dream or reality but ever present experiencing all these feeling yet unable to move or do anything about it.

Recently i listened to a file where shibby (the creator shes wonderful) was talking for a good 30 minutes just talking about her childhood and making me super relaxed. Then all of a sudden her tone shifted, she told me "youre already under hypnosis". She didn't even use a trigger and yet i was already deep under a spell of sleepyness. At some point she said to smile and i could just feel the tingles spread throughout my face as my smile grew bigger and bigger. I didn't even wanna smile but it just happened and i remember feeling insanely happy. Tingles consumed my face and my smile seemed to never stop getting bigger. Later she made me wake up and fall down a few times and each time it was harder to wake and i fell deeper and deeper each time. At some point I just felt my own mind turn upside down like you know that darkness you see when you close your eyes. That very darkness was spinning before my eyes and turning upside down as i felt tingles/butterflies like i was in a rollercoaster. Like my whole mind and body were spinning as if i was swept up in a wave of tingles.

One other time this hypnotic file made me experience this kind of mind orgasm where my whole body was shaking uncontrollably.

Now i wanted to type this again, on my last account people really liked it. Ive added more details and experiences now :) and im sure ill update this once i experience more of this feeling in my journey as a sub.

Also wanted to add these recent experiences: doing this sleeping naked challenge makes me more susceptible to tingles in general. When im naked under my blankets they almost tickle my sides and sensitive parts endlessly making me tingly alllll dayy. Anything that would normally make me tingly now is 10 times worse. Also have been trying nipple play which induces that feeling of tingles in my chest i talked about before.

Also when i feel tingles i often get supeeeerr needy and the tingles and warmth will spread to my puppy parts making me lose my mind in pure sensitivity. The tingles make my dick throb and ache as they turn any sensitivity i had there even more extreme. All this combined with the sleeping naked challenge and you can see why it's hard for me to do it and also making me kinda addicted to it. The fact im posting such personal experiences is extremely intoxicating.

All this to say i love this feeling and get more addicted to it every time i feel it, more sensitive as i become more accustomed to feeling mindless and getting weak in my own body for pure pleasure.

ill post any updates here :) thanks for making it this far!

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ronearoundblindly · 1 year ago

Note

For my favorite Steve 🥰💙🖤 (Fools Rush In)

29. Describe their nighttime routine.

30. What are their respective love languages? Do their love languages work well together?

38. Who’s got a quicker temper?

Questions are from this ask game and about this post-Endgame AU with Steve Rogers x lab tech!Reader.

There's no TV in your shared apartment because there are so, so many monitors on the compound. Steve likes some peace and quiet, to listen to records or the radio, or simply to read. Nighttime offers less drawing inspiration than daylight outdoors, but occasionally he'll putter with some sketching. That's harder to do while sitting right beside you on the couch, or while you lay with your head in his lap (and vice versa). Even if Steve reads, he has one hand on you, resting. In fact, he particularly enjoys books on tape because you two can snuggle and just relax.

This is your time to chat about the day, too, but since not everyday is very exciting, being present is enough.

All that is done in the living room because Steve is a bit of a purist in what you do where. Eat at the table. Relax on the couch. Sleep in the bed. Do not eat in the bed; that's not what it's for. Weird old fart...

It's fine to get sleepy on the couch, but it's very rare to stay asleep there all night.

For the most part, bedtime routines in the bathroom are separate. There's a His & Her's sink in the master bath, so if that's all anyone needs, you brush teeth and wash face side-by-side.

Steve starts out laying on his back with you curled up against his chest and hip. He does progressive relaxation to force his muscles to release tension from the day. He's so bulky now that this is crucial. It helps elongate his spine so when he does turn over to spoon you, Steve is properly gelatinous to mold around the back of your body.

Sometimes, if Steve can tell you're not asleep yet, he'll start humming your song, and he enjoys that he can hear your smile when you chuckle and wiggle deeper into his hold.

He runs hot, so Steve prefers a fan on in the bedroom which serves as low, white noise. He doesn't mind if you need a thicker blanket, however, he just mostly likes the air circulation.

If it's not obvious from Steve's nighttime routine, his love language is quality time. He appreciates the quiet moments you spend with him more than most celebrations. Time is precious to Steve Rogers. He understands its value. You giving him your time means everything.

(Not trying to make assumptions about every reader's love language, but I'm gonna wing it for Keeps.)

You thrive on words of affirmation, and Steve becomes better and better at communicating. He starts out so guarded because of the life he leads: his job is acts of service, he doesn't experience physical touch like other, he's...sorta terrible at gift giving, and Steve is being watched and listened to constantly. He's leery of everyone and everything. F.R.I.D.A.Y's everywhere--worse than J.A.R.V.I.S was--which takes a lot of getting used to.

He gets better, though. Steve has had to get comfortable with a lot of new-to-him behaviors. Not that he wouldn't have been nice and communicative with a girlfriend in the '40s, but he never had a girlfriend before. He's had zero practice, and at first, he's very awkward. Eventually, the words come easily, albeit always softly in public. He hates the idea of anyone else being in your relationship. They're there anyway.

Fools's Steve says "I love you" to you often, but the words have about three thousand variations of intonation and subtext, from playful to pissy. If you aren't alone, it's usually whispered.

Other than that, Steve not only tells you how lovely you look--even when you don't feel beautiful--but annoyingly and obviously means it every single time. You can see it in his eyes and his body language. It took a while to accept that he truly loves you and finds you beautiful. Your mind fought against accepting that. You were convinced by his every hesitation that it meant he couldn't possibly love you, but that wasn't true. That's not what was going on.

Steve took a while to sift through his feelings and hangups, but the question was never whether he loved you or was attracted to you. He worried whether or not he could be the partner he wanted to be to the right person.

Technically...Steve???? This one's a little complicated.

You get truly angry only after something has been stewing for a long time. Consistent, tiny annoyances or frustrating behaviors eventually boil to the surface in infrequent rages.

Steve, on the other hand, is cool as a cucumber until the most random, damndest things just 🫰🏼set him off. He's a cheeky bastard when his feathers are rumpled the wrong way. It's odd and totally hilarious.

He spends so much time as Cap letting everything just roll off his back like a duck in water. He has to go with the flow. He can only control himself and what he does in the future. He gives orders, yes, but humans err; Steve understands that maybe nothing he plans will go correctly. He's prepared for that.

But...what Steve isn't prepared for is people putting a vinyl record in the wrong dust jacket with no indication as to where the correct one will be. What kind of imbecile-- He can't stand his to-go order being totally opposite what it's supposed to be because seriously he didn't even make any substitutions! And absolutely hysterically, he can't handle there not being a 'wet floor' sign when the very shiny floors happen to be very slippery.

For a big man, Steve falls hard.

He got some great height though... Spun nearly 200 degrees mid-air before flopping the landing and bouncing against the far wall. Spectacularly funny when you know he isn't hurt. It's not even a pride or ego ding for Steve; he's simply furious that someone not-him could have been the one to slip.

So yeah, technically Steve has the quicker temper, but his anger lasts less time than yours.

Thank you for asking!

[Main Masterlist; Light Masterlist; Ko-Fi]

Tags: @supraveng @1950schick @patzammit

@whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @yiiiikesmish @ashesofblackroses

@jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @brandycranby @buckysprettybaby @ellethespaceunicorn

@late-to-the-party-81 @rogersbarber @im-a-slut-for-fluff @fangirl-swagg

@georgeweaslysgirl @austynparksandpizza @claireelizabeth85 @jamneuromain

#ro answers #ask game #fools rush in series #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers angst #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers fluff

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str4ngr · 1 year ago

Note

So don't know if you do school au's or not but this is for your 800 followers prompt board.May ask this with other fandoms

Fluff 2. bully x nerd

headcanon or ramble of your thoughts whatever works for you

But if it could be with the twist of the reader being the bully. More of the smart, manipulative, sit back and watch "If I have other people to do my dirty work, why get my hands dirty myself?(⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧" Type. Y'know

Maybe runs a delinquent gang korac (korack?spelling's hard) or 141. ¯⁠\⁠(⁠°⁠_⁠o⁠)⁠/⁠¯ idk feel free to take and leave what you want.

Character ideas:

Teacher's pet/nerd!Kyle who reader "asks"orders to let them see there notes after class behind the school "I wanna see how the top of the class organized all that info into one sheet of paper🥺", only too burn it in front of him with a lighter. later rubbing it in once the next test scores come through with a disappointing look from mr.price and a 67 return grade.

Dumb jock!Johnny who reader calls "soap" because he needs a bath.

Quiet kid!Simon that is as important as a ghost in the day time, Aka not.(To reader at least)

Pushover!könig that reader makes do all their heavy lifting bc "I'm the brain an your the bron, you'd be nowhere without me🤭"

History teacher!Mr.Price that can't prove that it's reader that is pulling the strings behind that sweet model student mask they put on.

I just need more mean reader 😭. Maybe reader find it amusing that someone like them is able to be picked on and that's why they bully them.

Have a lovely rest of your day

your majesty.

t.f.141 & könig. | my drug, my addiction.

cw: suggestive[?], obsession, foul language, age difference, mentions of bullying/hazing, college au, gn! reader. wc: 812. notes: kind of not x reader, idk. this is longgggg. also idk how to resolve this so it's like lowkey mid-story type shit. not proofread.

being the ball and staff holder of your little college was real fun. no body here really cared for your classes or your degrees, besides, going to those parties with too much alcohol and only one drinker, circulating those bloody-face pictures, and sending dares through burners, was far, far, more worth while.

professor price

obvi gonna make this a college au

i think his first instinct would to go after your underlings/ the physical perpetrators.

he wouldnt be able to catch them without evidence, but he would keep a close eye.

he observes them during any class he lectures of can sneak into but doesnt notice a direct connection between the victims and the bullies. many were in different classes, majors, floors, buildings, but there was always someone.

you.

attractive, intelligent, and charismatic, the idea of you being associated with this vicious bullying left a bitter stain on his tongue. but price couldnt deny it. you were always there. never missed a day of class, never missed a beat in taking your usual seat in the lecture hall of neither the front not back.

price goes home that day with a tug of war on his mind. he wasnt sure what to do. he could say, yes, you were there, but you werent when kyle was dragged to the back hallway.

he became almost obsessed, enthralled by the idea of, maybe, just maybe. it was a hard game.

you grinned to yourself as you stared at the newly "earned" money in your hands. you grinned knowing 'your' top grades were yours. you grinned because someone noticed, and now it was all the more fun. it was a long, long stretch. a bloody dance of two double-edged swords fighting for a purpose of neither justice or protection. truly just the adrenaline.

kiss-ass kyle.

kyle was almost helpless at the sidelines, chased down, mocked, and cheated.

"kyle, your grades have been falling, is there anything you want to talk about?"

you grinned when you heard prices voice from behind the ajar door, where he and kyle stood, revising kyle's most recent test scores.

top of class to barely passing?

price couldn't believe it. it was out of character for one of his best students to be spiraling down so rapidly.

"no, i'll do better."

he didn't.

you're staring at the way prices lips twitch into a frown, eyes flat as he hands kyle his paper. upside down.

lacky könig & toy johnny.

when könig first transferred to your college, it was awkward. how does someone with such a thick accent integrate to the cliquiest college? how but then such a sweet, beautiful, top student greet him, welcomes him with open arms

he was a lost puppy, following you without a leash, hearts in his eyes as he grabs another annoying rugby player.

your silky voice ringing in his ear,

"koko? do me a favor, make sure that soap kid doesn't come near me again?"

he didn't even need you to negotiate, he nodded, heavy stature shoving poor johnny against the brick wall of a far away storage building.

könig's imaginary tail wags behind him as he showed you a photo of beaten and pulped johnny,

"told him to never even look at you again!" his gruff voice would mutter, eyes brightening as you whisper,

"good boy."

johnny really became a toy after that. clueless and submissive to your insults as you berate him after each gym class, rolling oyur eyes in objective disgust while looking him up and down,

"sad the only clean part about you is the fact i call you 'soap', now fuck off, you're making it hard to breathe."

silent simon.

why bother with him.

simon was quiet, always.

so to you, he was really nothing more than a stick on the road that you had to run over.

and snap.

of course, it was easy. he didn't whine, hiss, growl. i imagine that he was lanky, tall, but skinny. and of course, when you see such an easy target, who are you not to take it?

you decided having könig be the one to break him wouldn't be any fun, but watching as the guy who already struggled with having any social life slowly get pushed farther and father into isolation?

now that was fun.

first you took his dumb himbo friend johnny, who was beat to a pulp, and told it was all simons fault.

dumb dog never spoke to him, and how fun it was to watch simon stare from afar as one of his only friends left him to eat lunch by himself.

next was kyle, who was kind enough to help simon with their history class.

"Kyle, keep talking to that hoodie kid, and i'll make sure the only thing that's ruined isn't just your grades."

You smile as kyle urgently responds to the texts in desperate pleas and promises to never speak to him. He didn't know it was you, but he did know you would follow through with your words.

notes: ughhh i hope i did this rq properly especially because i took so long on itt. sorry for taking so long, i was kind of struggling with how to portray each character in a cohesive setting.

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yona049 · 1 year ago

Text

𝐀𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐩𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐬 ♤

Joker x fem!Reader x Jason Todd

Part 3

○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

○○○○○○○○○○○○○○

Disclaimer!

>ptsd

>nightmares

>very chill part of the story.

༺༺༺༺༺༺༺༺༺༺༺༺༺༺༺

The night was quiet, with the excuse of some crickets and some very far off city parties. Y/n was asleep in bed with her head buried in Jason's bare chest.

The curtains blew gently in the wind letting the cool night air circulate though the room.

For once she looked normal. No clown makeup or wildly tied hair. Just a big T-shirt from Jay keeping her comfortable.

Y/n had a few days to calmly sleep where no villain would touch her to get to the Joker or late night bank robberies she had to wake up for.

But somehow this peace of mind didn't last long. Her body suddenly tenses up and her body lashes into a cold sweat.

Jason is first wake up when Y/n's nails scratch into his stomach.

"Ugh! Shit." he swears under his breath.

He delicately blinks before wiggling his body down to her level. Using his hand to cup her cheek.

"Hey, baby it's ok. Shh. Wake up."

His voice so smooth that even flower petals would be jealous. Knowing exactly what Y/n is feeling and having experience with traumatic Villain's, he tried to handle Y/n's nightmare with care.

Y/n's tense body suddenly jumps awake and her eyes were wet with tears. She looks up at Jason with glossy eyes, and in return he only smiles.

"Hey there beautiful, you're safe."

Y/n looks down at her hands before clenching her firsts seeing the scratch marks on Jay's stomach.

"Jason, I'm-" she couldn't manage another word before her face pulls into a sudden sobbing cry.

Jason pulls her back into his chest keeping her tightly in his grasp. Protected from all else lurking beyond the walls of the manner.

His fingertips comb though her hair and his arm tightens around her torso. A comforting pressure he knew she loved to feel.

"It's ok baby, I'm fine. Promise!"

He places butterfly kisses onto her head, reminding her that he's there to help her in any way possible.

Y/n sobbed for a few minutes after, with Jason not once telling her to stop and letting her feel for the first time in months.

Once she finally manage to catch her breath she rubs her nose with the back of her hand.

Jason smiles warmly again and places a small kiss on her tear stricken cheek.

"Let's go get some fresh air, Yeah? I'll show you my new favorite hiding spot."

He offers, combing Y/n's hair from her face. She nods in return and slowly gets up with Jason holding her hand.

They ran down the hallway barefoot like little children again making Y/n smile as they did, until Jason finally stopped at the window.

He pushes it open and moves his head outside for a peak.

"Jason.." Y/n says with a suspicious tone.

In return she only receives a mischievous smirk from Jason who was leaning against the windowsill.

With no effort at all, he falls back and out of the two story window. Y/n's eyes widen suddenly and she runs to try and grab him.

"JASON!" She yells worried pushing her upper body out of the window looking down.

Only for a sneaky kiss to hit her lips as Jason zips up with a grappling hook.

"Shh, you're gonna wake everyone up!" he teases watching Y/n pout.

He reaches around her waist and delicately pulls her out of the window for them both to be left hanging outside.

Y/n hurriedly grabs onto Jason's neck pulling herself against him while he held her around her waist.

With a zip their pulled up the side of the building until finally they reach the rooftop.

Slightly slanted with tiles threatening to slip out, and a buzzing city up ahead. Police sirens were faint but definitely audible, making Y/n wonder who's on patrol tonight.

She and Jason cuddled on the roof with her sat between his legs while he leaned back on his arms.

"So, are you gonna tell me what that nightmare was about?" he asked making Y/n flinch.

He pushed himself up resting his chin on her shoulder.

Y/n smiled and gave the side of his head a kiss. He moved his one arm around her waist trying to comfort her.

"It's a dream I haven't had since the first night in Jokers base."

"Hmm?"

Jason questioned, listening patiently.

"It's about you, what Joker did to you.."

Y/n tensed up.

"Joker talks about it alot. It's hard to bare sometimes. But in the dream, I was there. Watching you bleed out, tied to a chair with a smile painted onto your mouth with you own blood!"

Her breathing becomes shaky again and she starts picking it her fingernails.

"I'm hitting you, over and over! And I can't stop laughing!"

She clenches her jaw.

"Joker told me once, that you'd been beaten so badly that you started laughing-"

Jason quickly pushes his hand over her mouth feeling his body shiver a little from the memories.

"Y/n, please.. Don't."

Y/n finally turns back to look at Jason. His head down and his breathing rapid.

Y/n cups his face delicately pushing it to look up at her.

"Jason, I'm sorry." she tries to comfort him by rubbing his cheek with her thumb. She pushed his hair from his forehead and placed a kiss on it.

"No, it's ok. I asked." he trembled and took her hands in his.

"He's destroyed us both. Yet you've had to stay with him. Love him?" he growls with his fear turning to anger.

"This has to stop Y/n!"

His firsts clench with an angry growl.

Y/n Quickly shakes her head looking down.

"I can't Jason, I promised Bruce I'd get enough info to cut Joker off from inside. Hurt him till he can't recover!"

"HE'S ALREDY DONE THAT!" Jason yells.

"To you! To me! And to most of Gotham!"

Angry adrenaline rushed to his body causing him to stand up and walk a little further from Y/n.

Y/n knew this would happen. Jason got so angry at times that he needed to step back. His muscles tense and he becomes a little aggressive. That's why he made an effort to distance himself from her, to not hurt her.

"He's ruining my life without knowing it! He's keeping you to himself! Kissing you! Touching you! Torturing you. I can't even look at him without seeing his disgusting mouth on you!"

Jason suddenly swings and hits one of the chimney walls with full force. He may not be a Meta human or super, but all his life's training made him stronger than normal.

A very small crack formed in the bricks of the chimney. His body heaving with pent up anger.

Y/n waited a second, watching his tense back, before walking behind him and wrapping her arms around his torso.

She stood still, only holding him until he made another move. Like a elephant trying not to crush a dandelion.

Eventually his muscles relax and he turns around to look at Y/n pulling her into a hug.

A quiet sunrise sneaks up on them while they both bask in each other's comfortable embrace.

"Soon Jason, I'll get myself out. And I'll be here with you. I just need to take Joker down."

He nods, understanding her decision and pushing her head up, he kisses her gently with a mixture of bitter sadness in between.

~~~

"Alfred!" yelled from the kitchen, by a flour covered Tim Drake.

A mixing bowl in his arms, as sizzling pancakes burnt on the pan.

A well dressed butler enters the kitchen and casually lifts the pan off the stove.

"Yes, master Drake?" he questions as he flips the pan upside down letting the burnt pancakes fall into the bin.

"You have to help! Y/n is gonna wake up soon and I want to make her favorite!" Tim panics trying to page through the recipe book with dough covered hands.

Alfred smiles and softly takes the bowl from Tim's arms. He takes the milk and adds a little more to the mixture.

"Please cut the stems off the strawberries, Master Drake."

He nods and runs off to the cutting board. Suddenly the door is kicked open with a thud.

"I've got the oranges!!" Dick pants as he carries two large bags of oranges into the kitchen.

"Don't tell Bruce I grabbed them from his tree! He'll be pissed!"

"Too late!" warns Bruce with crossed arms in the doorway. He chuckled a little at Dicks panicked expression.

Damian runs by Bruce and immediately takes a seat next to Tim, sneakily grabbing a strawberry.

Tim growls and grabs the strawberry back.

"Hey! That's for Y/n! Wait."

Damian sends him a death glare and snatches another one, this time running from Tim's reach.

It's chaos in the kitchen when everyone tries to cook breakfast and make fresh orange juice.

Around the corner Y/n stood listening to the chaos. She was dressed in some jeans and one of Jason's sweaters.

She takes small steps towards Tim who was hyper focused on cutting the strawberries.

With a sudden swing of her arms, she swoops Tim off the seat and spins him around. Damian grabbing the chair before it hit the floor.

"Whoa! Y/N!" He laughs.

Everyone's eyes light up seeing her back in the manner. She giggles setting Tim back down, who spins around in his excitement.

Not realizing he still had a knife from the strawberries still in his hand.

He runs up to Y/n, but instead of an excited smile, Y/n's instincts kick in. She grabs hold of Tim's wrist and twists it until he drops the knife.

Tim whines at her tight grip. And Bruce quickly steps in.

"Y/n!"

Y/n's head snaps back and she gently drops Tim's wrist. She takes a deep breath and smiles again.

"Sorry, Tim. You caught me off guard!"

Tim shakes his head and smiles back at Y/n.

"I know better. I'm sorry!"

Completely wiping the sour moment from the sweet memory, he drags her into the kitchen and shows her his pancakes.

Dick makes quick work of the orange and pours her a glass.

"Milady!" he smoothly slides the glass across the table.

Y/n smiles grabbing it before it hit the floor.

"Good to see you, Mistress L/n."

"Thank you Alfred!" she laughs taking in the deep smell of her favorite breakfast.

Their chatter dims out as Bruce picks up the knife off the ground. He looks at Jason who'd been standing in the hallway watching the entire thing.

They share a mutual worried look before Jason walks into the kitchen beside Y/n.

A few hours after breakfast Y/n was infront of the bat computer, in the echoing bat cave.

Her fingertips flew over the keypad as she brought up multiple villainous faces onto the screen.

Bruce stood close behind with Jason slanted over the chair. Eyes closely watching the screen.

"These are the jokers informants in the GCPD. Commissioner Gordon should know how to handle them quietly."

She squeezes her eyes shut and slants her head down.

"Um... Hold on. I'm trying to remember."

She bites her bottom lip and clenches her fists. Her memories slipping away from the amount of names and information she had to remember.

Bruce delicately places his hand on her back and pats it a little.

"That's good Y/n, don't strain yourself. We have over one hundred and fifty names here. That's enough for now."

Y/n sighs and looks back at Jason who wore a proud smile.

She smiled back and walked over to him taking a seat on his lap and flopping onto his chest with a hefty sigh.

He chuckled at her and started to delicately twist his fingers through her hair.

"I don't see why she's so important!" a voice echos from one of the platforms.

Damian sat cross-legged on one of the tables with a cloth cleaning one of his katanas.

His expression wasn't impressed as he slipped down from his seat and walked up them.

"It's simple enough to be under cover! But how hard can it be to remember a few names?"

Jason quickly growls and was about to yell at the disrespectful little boy, until Y/n put her hand over his mouth and she smirked.

"Alright then!" she says slipping off Jason's lap and walking up to Damian, squaring him up.

"I propose a duel! One of memory and skill!"

Damian makes eye contact and tilts his head, his interest peaked.

Y/n smiles on the inside and explains:

"The computer will simulate random "Karate Kata's" of.. Lets say 200 moves. We will each be told each move beforehand. Then need to preform them right after. Last one to forget a move wins. "

(Definition of Karate Kata : A choreographed series of Karate moves preformed in a certain order to create a full kata. Each kata generally has 20-70 moves.)

Damian takes a second to think placing his hand on his chin.

"We will each be given different Kata's to avoid cheating from the opposing side."

"Agreed!" Y/n says.

Damian sticks his hand out and Y/n shakes it with confidence.

"Now this might be interesting." Bruce mutters in the background.

Sneakily he leans over the desk and holds down a button on the bat computer.

"Hey boys, you might wanna come down and see this~"

He hums, calling the rest of the bat family from upstairs.

Ten minutes later, the smell of popcorn and competition filled the air. Y/n and Damian were situated beside each other on a dojo mat.

Jason, Dick, Tim, Bruce and the one and only Alfred came to watch the spectacle.

With a comm in each of their ears, Y/n and Damian give a bow before taking starting positions. Firsts by their hips and feet apart.

"Computer, send the kata's to their comm's." Bruce gives the starting command.

Y/n closes her eyes to listen while Damian stares into the abyss, both absorbing the info being fed to them.

Moments later they both yell "Ready!"

Bruce drops his arm like the flag at a race track, and watch them both start moving.

Starting with a forward Punch and a sudden back kick, Damian had to dodge quickly.

"Oops! Better stay focused!"

She teases and Damian growls not missing a step in his own Kata.

Every so often they both would have near misses. Almost tripping, punching or kicking each other. This kept their onlookers on their toes.

Nearing the end, Damian starts to slow down, hesitating before every move. Y/ also hesitated once or twice.

Y/n takes a peak back at Damian who was nearing the end of what he could remember. Y/n felt a twinge of guilt in her heart and immediately threw her hands in the air.

"Damn! I really don't remember that well!"

Damian looks back at her somewhat relived but quickly switches back to his serious exterior.

Standing straight, and walking over to Y/n. He shared a hand shake with her.

Even tho everyone knew Y/n threw the game, it was important that Damian wasn't embarrassed infront of his brothers, who's respect he treasured.

"Still, getting this far is a impressive feat. Good game!" Damian smiles a little at Y/n.

Y/n couldn't help the adorable smile, from Damian, becoming her to hug him! Damian's eyes widen and he tries pushing her off.

"Jason!! She has me in her grip!" he calls out for help but Jason chuckles.

"Yeah! I'd say you've got about three seconds before she cuts off your oxygen."

The entire family quickly breaks out in a laugh fest! Watching Y/n share her affection to, what is basically a blushing brick wall.

Damian continues his struggle for a moment until red lights start flaring up.

Everyone's attention now looking at the bat computer waiting for a status report. From laughing family to distributers of justice.

"Oncoming call from Comissioner Gordon." the computer states. Bruce lifts a phone to his ear and nods.

Quickly, Jim's voice beams through the speaker.

"We have a problem. Joker has planted a toxin bomb into Gotham mall. He's holding hostages and is demanding to see Red hood annd Batman."

Bruce squints at the phone before turning his gaze to Y/n.

"On our way." he says finally ending the call.

Y/n felt her breathing catch in her throat and her fists clench.

"He's throwing a tantrum. He's looking for her!" Jason growls standing stiff and ready to fight.

Bruce nods and walks quickly towards the bat suits delicately displayed on mannequins.

"She's set to transport to Arkam tomorrow. But my geuss is that Joker can't wait that long. Dick, Jason, with me!"

Jason growls loudly again and stomps off after Bruce.

Quickly getting dressed. Y/n watches Jason pull two guns from the shelf and shove it into his holsters.

His brown jacket in Y/n's arms leaving him in a black, sleeveless, turtle neck shirt. His movements angry and frustrated.

"Jason.." Y/n whispers.

"What!" he quips.

Y/n flinches gripping the leather in her hands.

Jason's gaze softens with a soft exhale.

"I'm sorry, doll." he walks up to her and places his hands on her arms rubbing them up and down.

She looks down at his brown leather jacket and whispers.

"I know, you're not excited to see the 'other boyfriend' right now. But you can't hurt Joker. He has to break me out of the transport van tomorrow! I... Can't go back to Arkam."

Her grip tightens on the jacket, memories of her parents threatening to flood back.

Jason sighs and pulls her into a small kiss.

"I can't promise that I won't punch him. And I won't allow you to go back there. Not until you're ready."

He whispers to her, giving her arms a gentle squeeze of comfort.

Y/n pushes the jacket onto Jason's chest.

"You need to go."

Jason takes his jacket and swings it over his shoulders leaving Y/n behind with a final whisper.

"I'll be back soon, Love."

#x reader #batman #joker jared leto #joker x reader #jason todd x oc #joker dc #dc joker #jason todd x y/n #jason todd x you #jason todd x reader #jason todd

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aequitaes · 24 days ago

Note

It's dark when he begins to wake, which is concerning, given that the automatic shutoff for the lights in the Seat of Divine Foresight is at a far later time than the hour he'd teased the Stoneheart with. Granted, he hadn't actually meant to fall asleep, however Aventurine ran a lovey level of warm, and he'd been fighting exhaustion since the morning- some days were more tiring than others, in his old age. Knowing he should wake doesn't quite register to his conscious mind, and his body instead nuzzles closer, cheek against the gloriously soft fabric of Aventurine's thigh. As he does, the man's scent invades his senses- woody and a touch floral, with an undercurrent of something sweet and heady- and he sighs in the back of his throat. Aventurine's hand grips the fabric on the back of his shoulder, and he begins to wake.

Two things get his attention immediately- the soft, trembling gasp from overhead... and the faint shift of the thigh beneath his cheek, driven up and forward by an involuntary twitch of the hips his arm is wrapped around.

(And oh, isn't that quite the apology he'll have to give?)

More than the movement, however, it's the sensation that accompanies it- a hot, hard swell against his cheek- that makes his eyes blink open immediately. Lifting his head proves that the lights aren't yet off- but rather that Aventurine had thrown his blazer over his head to shield him from the light. In fact, much of their current position seems to be for the benefit of his comfort in this situation... and the discomfort of the blond above him. Well- perhaps discomfort isn't the right word... chagrin, perhaps? Mortification? Yet sleep-hazed as he is, the General can't quite parse it as real, presuming he's having quite the dream indeed.

So he allows himself an indulgence, leaning his cheek back against that same thigh, that same restrained hardness, and blinks languidly up at Aventurine, arm tightening around his hips.

"Since that's likely the fault of my admittedly... presumptuous behavior," he smiles, slow and sleepy still, a yawn escaping, tongue curling against the back of a sharp incisor. "...shall I take care of it for you?"

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐀𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐞, though he tried - and failed. For a short while, he let his mind wander, reflecting on how different his life looked now. The Stoneheart would never have presumed himself in a position quite like this - and he’d been in many. Aside from the tingling sensation running the length of his outer thigh from waning circulation, he wasn’t entirely uncomfortable. In truth, he hadn’t truly believed Jing Yuan would take that nap he teased about, yet… he let him rest anyway.

It became harder to ignore, however, when the General brushed alongside the inside of his thigh, when he could feel the slow, measured breath blooming in a far more intimate place than was wise. Yeah, you’re gonna have to stop that, he thought, shifting inch by inch to grant himself reprieve - lest the man wake to the mortification of exactly what effect he was having. He was quick to throw his blazer over the General’s head, shielding him from the light, perhaps even offering a sliver of dignity to the moment. Or maybe it was more for himself.

It wasn’t that Aventurine didn’t want that kind of closeness. He did. And he hadn’t exactly been subtle about it. But Aventurine was playing the long game. People didn’t stick around for someone like him, not when the thrill wore off. Not when it came to staying. And so, he wouldn’t put Jing Yuan in a position he hadn’t consciously chosen.

Still, when an arm curled tighter around his waist and a yawn followed close behind, Aventurine knew that sleepy weight was about to become something much more dangerous. He steeled himself, ready to play it off - to turn it into a joke, a flirt, a passing fantasy. What he didn’t expect was the offer. The words spoken in a low drawl, sleep drunk but undeniably real.

His cheeks flushed, tinged a shade of soft pink that only deepened as he looked down at the man sprawled contentedly between his legs, utterly unbothered by his position. His smirk returned - knowing, but no less teasing. “Well,” he began, a hand lifting to gently feather through white strands, “I think it’s only fair.” It was a tease. Or at least, it started that way - because surely, surely, Jing Yuan wouldn’t follow through. Not like that. Not here.

“But you’re still half asleep,” he added with a laugh that didn’t quite hold steady, betraying the tension low in his spine. His hand lingered in the general’s hair - once, twice - calm, measured, controlled. If he left it there too long, he might start to believe this was something soft. Something he could have.

“And I wouldn’t want you regretting anything once that noble sense of propriety kicks in.” The grin returned, crooked and knowing. A beat passed. Then, quieter, more honest, just a thread of vulnerability laced into the velvet of his tone: “But… if that offer was more than just a sleep addled whisper...” his fingers traced down the curve of Jing Yuan’s ear, slow and deliberate, “ - you’d better not fall asleep halfway through.”

Leaning back once more, letting the illusion of ease settle over him like a familiar coat, Aventurine resumed that idle leg bounce beneath the general’s head. His smile stayed - charming, closed, careful.

Waiting.

#〔 character select ╰┈➤. aventurine 〕#〔 inbox ╰┈➤ hope you don’t disappoint me ━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━ aventurine 〕#〔 dynamic ╰┈➤ order meets chaos in silk gloves. ━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━ aventurine/jing yuan : warmarshall 〕#warmarshall #suggestive cw #( hey look!! i gave them a tag !! idk if its The One yet but KJDSHKJD )#looking back to our first post and i once again say. your move jing yuan (:

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skzoologist · 2 years ago

Note

Heya!

For the 100 follower event, I was thinking:

Haunted House with ot9 🧋

"Did...you also see that shadow move...?"

-🐹

word count: ~1.6k

warnings: none

genre: crack, just a tad bit of fluff too

a/n: Dear, did you somehow look into my head? I was just thinking about how Bae would fair in a Haunted House a week or two ago, your timing is scarily good 🫢 Anyway, hope you enjoy this silly thing! Also my hand fucking slipped again, the word count only keeps getting longer with each request, what is actually wrong with me 💀

Please let me know if I left a warning or anything out, I will add it in! Reblogs, likes and feedback are greatly appreciated!

!I don't condone anyone stealing my work and posting it anywhere without my permission, or feeding it to AI!

!This is just fiction, my interpretation of Stray Kids. By no means is this how they are and how they behave in real life!

“Why are we here again?” - Chan asked, the usual strength in his voice now gone, replaced by unease. “Because you’re a weak, old man, and you said yes to Jisung hyung when he asked if we could come here.” - Seungmin replied with that typical, teasing tone of his, absolutely enjoying the situation to its fullest. “But a Haunted House? Really?? I’m gonna die in there and come back as a vengeful spirit, just to haunt all of you for the rest of your lives!” “Hyune, come on, it’s not that bad. Also let go of Bae hyung, you’re cutting off the circulation in his arm–” - Felix hastily replied, knowing his unbothered hyung would not say it himself.

Hyunjin let Bae’s arm go, the limb numb and unresponsive. The younger apologetically patted Bae’s back, a sheepish smile on his face that was quickly taken over by fear and nervousness. The older didn’t mind it to be honest, his own mind more occupied by other things.

But still, he gently ruffled Hyunjin’s hair with his working arm, silently focusing back onto the conversation the others were having, their group standing outside the dreaded establishment.

“Since this place allows bigger groups to go in, we can all go together, and maybe the scaredy cats won’t piss themselves this way.” - Minho smirked, a playful glint in his eyes as they swept over the mentioned males. “Hey!” - Chan shouted in english, not happy with his newly earned nickname. “What? Hyung is right. I’m afraid you’d die of a heart attack if you were to go alone.” - Jeongin added in, fistbumping with the group’s puppy and quietly laughing to themselves.

As Chan was silently seething in rage -obviously just annoyed at his menaces-, Changbin held him back by an arm and patted it, trying his best to not let chaos ensue this early on.

It hadn’t been long since they’d arrived at the place, having a day for themselves and to rest. So what other way to spend it, than to go have fun in an amusement park?

“Let’s just gooooo! We’ve been standing here for 20 minutes, I wanna see what’s inside already!” - Jisung whined, a pout taking its customary place on his face. “Yes, yes, we’re going, you whiny baby.” - Chan relented with an exhausted sigh, accepting his fate.

Jisung and most of the others lit up, cheering in anticipation, all the while Chan latched onto Changbin and went after Felix. Hyunjin was unsurprisingly attached to Bae with a deadly grip, as if his life depended on it, and considering how easily scared the man was, maybe that was the case.

Taking in a deep breath, Bae put his free hand onto one of Hyunjin’s, his long legs carrying him after the others.

Immediately after they stepped in through the door, the atmosphere was set. No light was let in from outside, not even through the tiniest of cracks; only faint, ambient lighting was there to lead the way and shine upon the various props placed all around.

Everything was there that you could ever imagine: from artificial cobwebs hanging down the ceiling to sprayed on blood, knives and scissors hugging the stains and painting a horrifying picture for the unfortunate ones who successfully glanced at it. The place was unnervingly quiet, only some faint laughter could be heard from deep within the heart of the house. Those usually obvious signs of it being played from a speaker now gone, having successfully planted fear into their minds.

The front of the group was having the time of their lives, going up close to every prop and mimicking the moving animatronics. Their joyous laughter strangely added to the mood, leaving shivers in their wake amongst the scared ones.

Everything was going as expected. Everyone was having fun to a certain extent, until the group somehow got torn apart, and in the worst way possible: those who were in the back got left behind, most of them shaking and on edge already.

“It’s okay Channie hyung, me and Binnie hyung will lead the way, so nothing will jump out at you or Hyunjinnie hyung.” - Felix’s deep voice was low and soothing amidst the chaos that was taking over their minds.

Chan and Hyunjin nodded, appreciation lighting up their eyes, something that the two at the front caught even in the darkness that caged them in.

This plan of theirs was the best they could come up with, because if it came to it, Changbin could just shout with all his might to show the poor workers their place and assert dominance. It’d happened once, a mere 10 minutes ago. Bae’s ears were still ringing just from the mere thought of it.

The tallest watched everything unfold in deadly silence, letting the two scaredy cats cling to him desperately and use him as a living shield. Mainly because he had no choice, with the way Hyunjin was practically glued to his back, Chan seizing Bae’s right arm for himself.

Their strategy seemed to have been working, Felix and Changbin easily triggering the scares and taking them in stride. They weren’t so easily frightened, they could take a little scare here and there. Not even the chains and hooks from the ceiling phased them, the rusted metal clinging together and drawing a chill up the others’ spines.

The other half of the split group could finally be heard nearby, a casual conversation freely flowing between the members despite their environment.

With no prior warning the room Bae’s group was in turned an eerie red, the doors shut closed with a sudden thump. The chatter outside was cut short, confusion pouring over them as they’d passed through that same room, yet the doors always remained open, no red light creeping out from underneath.

The ones inside were in a much worse condition, even Felix and Changbin panicking a bit now. Their vision was obstructed by the props dangling from the ceiling, every little movement causing them to rattle and send the boys into brief panic.

“Hey uh… Binnie. Did… you also see that shadow move…?” - Felix’s voice was shaky, even his mind was now playing tricks on him, urging him to grip onto the mentioned male’s shirt. “Thankfully not.”

That was the only thing that could be heard before something jumped out from the shadows, ignoring the two braver ones and going straight for the other three. Chan and Hyunjin screamed, their eyes shut and breath held back to a dangerous degree, arms impossibly tightening up around Bae’s unmoving form.

It was a worker, dressed up as a serial killer, their weapon held right in front of Bae’s face. Satisfied with the screams they earned from the covering two -and maybe Changbin too-, the killer left, expertly slinking back into the shadows.

The lights soon dimmed back to their usual state, the doors clicking open and the group whole once again.

“What the fuck was that?” - Seungmin asked, just slightly worried for his hyungs, something he wouldn’t ever admit. “I uh, I have no clue. I guess it was a timed event?” - Felix tried to reason, a hand carding through his hair and smoothing the stray strands out. “I have never heard you guys scream like that before. You guys okay?” - Jisung laughed out, joined by a few others.

The two shaken up males merely nodded, not trusting their voices after what had just happened, understandably so. This drew out another round of quiet laughter from the others, a bit more relieved now than before.

“Alright, let’s go then. We shouldn’t linger around for long, who knows what’ll happen next time.” - Jeongin suggested, a playful look thrown at Chan and Hyunjin’s way.

Everyone silently agreed, not even entertaining the thought of ever experiencing that again. They took on the formation they had started with when they’d first entered the haunted house, but now sticking closer together, just for that little bit of extra comfort it brought.

Chan and Hyunjin were about to go as well, but the one they held onto remained in his spot, still unmoving. A simple glance was all it took for the two to realise how rigid Bae was, every muscle in his body pulled taut.

“Bae hyung?” - Hyunjin quietly asked, voice a mere whisper.

No answer greeted him back, but it drew the whole group’s attention, everyone gathering around with worried and confused glances.

With no reaction to any of their questions, Bae finally moved, only one goal in his mind: Minho’s arms.

The older took him in his embrace with no question, only hesitating for a second, if any. Everything made sense to him now, why Bae was even quieter than usual, why his movements were a bit choppy and weird.

“Were you afraid, jagi?” - it was a simple question, one that finally got an answer in the form of a nod, more than enough for the older.

Minho breathily laughed, taking the scared otter into his arms and carrying him away, while Bae just quietly clung to his clothes and buried his head into the crook of his neck. Even as the menaces started teasing the flustered idol and repeatedly kept saying how cute he was, he just hid deeper into his hyung’s hold, feeling safe at last.

“Next time I’m carrying him.” “In your dreams, Sungie.” “How did you know?”

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rebel-walnut · 2 years ago

Text

Let's Do The Time Warp Again

Steddie Season 3 time travel fic, Part 8

Ao3, Pt. 1, Pt.2, Pt.3, Pt.4, Pt.5, Pt.6, Pt.7

Eddie doesn't know if he's breathing or not. He doesn't think he is. Doesn't matter anyways, seeing as he's dead.

The super-kid's words are ringing through his ears and all he can hear is not supposed to be alive, not supposed to be alive, not supposed to be alive. He doesn't know what that means for getting back to '86, if he'll go through and die anyways, if they'll come back earlier, later, maybe they'll die in the process. As far as he's concerned, Supergirl just marked his time of death and stamped his forehead 'deceased.'

His breaths are short and shallow, a constant influx of oxygen he shouldn't be allowed to breathe. Taking up someone else's air, someone else's space- what even happened to this version of Eddie? Is Eddie from '85 back where he's currently supposed to be, drowning in a pool of his own blood that isn't really his? Does he just not exist anymore? If Eddie thinks much longer about the implications of interdimensional time travel and clone duplicates he's gonna throw up.

There's pressure on his wrist and the whirling of Eddie's vision subsides enough for him to see everyone staring at him expectantly. Steve has Eddie's right hand clasped between both of his own, and he's rubbing circles across the joint of Eddie's thumb while another finger rests across his pulse. He idly wishes Steve was holding his hand for a reason other than making sure Eddie isn't dead.

Eddie's laugh is cruel around the edges, sharp in a way that it only ever is when he's putting effort into it. The sound hurts his ears. "So this thing- Vecna, or the upside down, whatever- is trying to kill me. Correction- has killed me. Wants to do it again, but sooner," The smile on his face is foreign and forced, he recognizes it as a shadow of his father's own malicious sneer that only ever wreaked havoc. Eddie wants to claw it out of his skin.

Steve presses a touch harder into his pulse point and Eddie wants to scream along with his heart beat. "And! We don't even know if we can get back. Say we can. We get back to '86 where we left off. Then Stevie here," Eddie claps Steve on the chest with his free hand and ignores the vice grip that's somehow still gentle around his wrist, "gets to drag my lifeless, chew-toyed body back out of hell, because it turns out I'm dead anyway! Oh well, c'est la vie, at least I get to live out my last days trapped in a different timeline waiting for imminent death; likely in the form of crushing killer vines that'll pop the eyes out of my skull, creepy mind wizard torture, or more bats ripping tiny chunks of flesh out of my sides until I'm nothing but bone and eccentric fashion choices."

The collective noises from the group could best be described, Eddie would say, as strangled, horrified, and wildly disgusted. Perhaps his monologuing skills leave much to be desired, but sue him. He just found out about his sealed fate, he's allowed to make it slightly funny despite the general aura of horror.

Steve has given up on being gentle it seems, his nails dig in slightly to Eddie's skin and his fingers are wrapped tight enough to block circulation. He's stopped tracing over Eddie's knuckles, opting instead to just hold Eddie's hand still in the tightest grip known to man. The various children keep staring at him with ranged looks of devastation; Supergirl looking concerned but still with the tight set to her jaw that tells him the next words out of her mouth will be a solution to his problem, Red with mostly shock stricken through her eyes but with an undertone of disinterest that he knows she wears for show, and Henderson doing nothing to hide his reaction of absolute guttural horror. Eddie feels a twinge of guilt for subjecting him to his monologue.

"Eddie-" Steve starts but cuts himself off just as fast. He gapes for a second as his eyes burrow into Eddie's, the shock still settling in the air. "We'll find a way. We always do, we're not gonna-"

"No, Harrington!" Eddie wrenches his hand out of Steve's suffocating grip and ignores the way his expression falls. "I know your band of misfits has been at this for a while, but face it. You've lost people. I know you have. None of you should have the far-away look of a veteran when you're all just kids. You've lost people, and I'm gonna be one of them, and there's nothing you can do to stop it. I'm already gone."

Eddie pointedly pushes back the hot prickling in his eyes and forces his way out of the living room, keeping his gaze turned to the floor. He hears deafening murmurs as he leaves, passing by the kitchen on the way to the sliding glass door at the back. He lets it glide shut behind him with a click, wishing Harrington didn't have those fancy spring loaded door stoppers so he could actually slam it. The pool is glinting in front of him, cover half off and folded at the deep end. There's a small collection of leaves circling the surface of the water, catching the glint of the setting sun on their waxy coating. Eddie throws a rock from the edge of the pool at one just to watch it sink.

He shuffles through the pockets of his sweats for a second before finding a crushed half empty pack of Pall Malls and a bic with a melted corner. He's grateful he remembered to grab them from his vest when he changed and managed to salvage what cigarettes he could from the water damage, but he grimaces at Eddie from July of '85's brand choice anyways. He knows he only bought it cause it's cheap, and lights up regardless of his brand prejudice. The cherry glows orange and he takes in almost a third of the cig in one drag, only sputtering a little on the way out. He finishes it in two more drags and lights up another after smashing the butt into the concrete pool lip to snuff it. He's halfway through the second one when he hears the smooth glide of the door open and click shut softly. Eddie doesn't bother looking to see who it is, he already knows it's Steve.

Steve pads up behind Eddie, giving him enough space that Steve's still out of sight. Steve clears his throat but Eddie doesn't turn, just flops down by the edge of the pool and watches the smoke curl around his fingers. The ash falls into the edge of the pool as Eddie flicks it, taking the last drag and letting the acrid buzz wash over him. It stings as it burns down to his fingertips around the filter, but he just watches as the flame trickles out.

The gravel crunches under Steve's shoes as he moves to gingerly sit next to Eddie, his gaze burning a hole into Eddie's cheek. Eddie watches him out of his periphery, Steve glancing between Eddie and the darkening sky with unhidden interest. Eddie fishes out another cigarette and lights it, wordlessly offering it to Steve after the first puff. Their fingers brush as Steve takes it and Eddie can't help but stare at Steve's relaxed posture betrayed by the tension in his shoulders as he takes a pull to rival Eddie's own first drag. He hands it back without looking, slowly releasing the smoke and letting it drift into the wind. Eddie can't help but think it's the sort of thing people write songs and make paintings about. They finish the dart in silence, stealing glances at each other and letting cheap nicotine steady their nerves. Steve clears his throat again quietly while Eddie stubbs the filter against the ground.

"I hate this pool," Eddie glances at him, but Steve's got a mile long stare trained on the surface of the water. "Back in '83-" He cuts himself off as he seems to so often do lately and drops his chin to his chest with a sharp exhale. Eddie brushes his fingers against the back of Steve's hand but doesn't break his silence when Steve meets his eyes. "Barbara Holland went missing from this pool. Died in the upside down because of it- because of me,"

"Steve-"

"No. It's true," Steve presses his hand against Eddie's fingers and he can feel it tremble as Steve looks back out to the water. "I was too preoccupied with trying to impress Nance, impress my friends, my parents. Which, not worth it. At all. Anyway, I was too focused on myself and we lost her, and I just- I didn't fucking care. I don't know if it was a defense mechanism or what, but I just tried not to think about it. Distracted myself with Nance, school, parties, anything to stay away from it. I just didn't want to admit it was my fault she died."

Steve's eyes are glistening a hazel gold in the sunset, a sheen of unshed tears catching the light. It's a melancholy stare, the look of grief and guilt and regret wrapped in one sun kissed gaze. Eddie doesn't know what to do except bump his shoulder against Steve's and hope the contact comforts him.

"And I'm trying to be better. Be the person who would never let that happen, or at least never let it be forgotten. But sometimes I just catch the water out of the window of my room and…" Steve slumps into the comfort of Eddie's arm, his hair tickling Eddie's cheek. His expression is the most broken Eddie's ever seen it, every piece of it shattered and irreplaceable. Each exhale sends a tremor through Steve's body, and Eddie slides the fingers still pressed against Steve's skin around his hand before wrapping his other hand around their tangled fingers and squeezing. Steve gives a half hearted squeeze back, and Eddie pulls Steve's hand to his chest and holds it tenderly between his own.

"All we can do is try," Eddie whispers against their hands, tracing circles across Steve's knuckles just as Steve had done for him. "You can't change your past. And yes, I realize the irony of that statement seeing as we're currently in the past, but," He halts his movements against Steve's hand to face him, Steve already staring when he goes to look. "As much as I hated to admit it before, and as much as it still surprises me now, you're good, Steve Harrington," A wounded noise breaks out of Steve and he leans a fraction closer towards Eddie as if trying to live off his words. "You're good. You're kind, and gentle, and you care about those kids more than anyone I've ever met. You couldn't have known what would happen with Barb. And you're living for her now, which is what matters," The tears brimming in Steve's eyes finally break free at the mention of Barb's name. Eddie lets his composure shatter at the sight, and presses a light kiss to Steve's knuckles.

"You live for her everyday through those kids, through everyone you're so desperate to protect from the things you've witnessed, the people you've lost. What happens- happened to me, it's not your fault. And it won't be again," Steve's shaking his head in little jerking motions that send waves of hair falling in front of his eyes. His hand squeezes between Eddie's and when Steve stops to look at him, the shattered expression is still there but this time it's sewed together with determination.

"You can't," Steve chokes, his grip strong with calloused grief. "We can't lose again, it can't happen. We can't lose you- it can't happen. Promise me it won't," Steve's pleading, their faces inches from each other and Steve's tears are catching on the ridges of his nose and the divot above his quivering lip. Eddie's own cheeks are wet with trails of salt water, and he can't help but clutch Steve's hand to his chest.

"Stevie," He starts, and instantly regrets his next words. "I can't. You know I can't, my fate is practically sealed," His words are hoarse as Steve falls somehow closer to him, their skin buzzing with the proximity and the mourning in Eddie's words. Steve chokes.

"Lie to me."

Eddie chokes. Grips Steve harder and squeezes his eyes shut.

"I promise."

It wrenches a sob from both of them, their foreheads falling together and their hands clutched between them as they suffocate on grief. It's strange to be mourning his own death with a man he didn't talk to a mere week ago, yet their lives have become so intertwined that Eddie can't imagine going through this with anyone else. It's a broken sort of bond that comes with loss, and it's a little surreal to have someone other than his Uncle or Hellfire care this much. Grieve this much.

They're clutching pieces of each other, Steve's hand still wrapped in Eddie's, Steve's other hand tangling in the hair at the nape of Eddie's neck, Eddie's other hand pulling at the collar of Steve's soft blue tee. Their tears cling to their jaws and fall in droplets of the worst kind of rain on the concrete, a few dropping over the edge to mix with the chlorine. Eddie feels the tremor of Steve's sobs all the way up his spine and into his skull, buzzing in his forehead where they're still connected. The ache in their lungs lasts both an eternity and a minute as the tremors and initial grief settles into something worse yet also softer in their bones. It's almost acceptance. But Eddie knows it isn't.

Eddie blinks a few times and waits for his vision to stop swimming, Steve's breath tickling his cheek on every exhale just as Eddie's sure he's doing the same to Steve. Their grasp on each other is heavy in a way that would take years to undo, and Eddie can't stop staring at the way Steve's cheeks are flushed from crying. They're tinged pink across the apples of his cheeks and the tip of his nose, and his lips are slick from tears. Another stray tear falls from Steve's eyelashes and Eddie gently raises the hand from his shirt to brush the tear away. Steve leans into the touch and blinks his eyes open, his gaze jumping between Eddie's eyes and back down.

Eddie wills his heart to slow. The edge of mourning is not an opportune time to notice the smoothness of Steve's skin or the flecks of green at the center of his eyes or the way his lips hang open just enough.

But.

Steve is staring at him like he's an answer to something. He's flitting his gaze across Eddie's face, bouncing from eye to eye and landing on his lips, and he's leaning into Eddie's hand still touching his cheek, his skin warm under the movement of Eddie's thumb. He's swaying into Eddie's space, all warmth and softness and presence, and when Steve tilts his head up just a little their noses brush. His lips are parted in a way that would fit the apple from the garden of Eden, ripe and red and tempting. And Eddie is starving.

"Steve," Eddie whispers, more air than voice. Steve doesn't look up from his lips, just tilts his head farther into Eddie's hand. He noses up the ridge of Eddie's nose, Steve's eyelashes brushing against his cheek as he leans a breath closer. Eddie wants to scream.

He thumbs Steve's cheek and pulls just soft enough to guide Steve closer, both basking in the warmth of the other's skin and touch. Steve puffs a breath over Eddie's lips, close enough to feel the sparks between their skin. It's electricity and kindness and grief, and Eddie wants nothing more than to take a bite out of the apple.

What was left of the space between them dissipates as Eddie leans in just enough to brush their lips together, their tear stained skin sticking to each other. It's more of a touch than a kiss; just enough to test the waters, to get a taste of temptation. It's featherlight and golden, a gentle brush of just their top lips. Just to feel. Enough to know that Eddie needs to swallow him whole.

Eddie slides the hand that was cupping Steve's cheek around to the back of neck and runs his fingers through the hair curling there, pulling ever so slightly closer. He's about to bridge the gap between an almost kiss and a real kiss -capture Steve's golden light and sinful lips- when Eddie's vision whites out with a crack of lightning and a shock that rips through his skin.

He lets out a cry and pulls away from Steve to claw at his forehead, frantically scratching and pulling at his skin. There's hornets stinging behind his eyes and biting at his skull, and all he can feel is pain and bright sharpness. It sends a ringing scream through his body that Eddie can barely hear over the pain, sucked into the shards of glass running up his veins and the feeling of acid biting at his skin. It's a sucking, endless feeling, like every bit of energy is being pulled from him and replaced with screeching tones and hot sand that's dissolving him bit by bit.

There's a pressure on his arm and through his staticky tunneled vision he sees Max pulling him up. He can't tell what she's saying, nor can he really see her face, can just make out the shape of fiery red hair. She pulls him up to a half-sitting-half-fetal position. She says something, but it may as well be in a different language. Eddie's being simultaneously cut open and burned from the inside out, his head is switched to ten different radio stations that just play static interluded with guest appearances from the depths of hell, and every inch of his skin is on fire.

Well, Eddie thinks, so much for that kiss. Which is honestly a ridiculous thing to think about when he's on the verge of death, but well, he's a little resigned to his fate. He doesn't want to go through another week or month or year of waiting for something to strike, having episodes of seizures brought on by dark dimensional wizards and whatever the fuck is happening right now. But still. It would've been nice.

His mind swims in an attempt to distract from the blades slicing through his brain, and Eddie thinks he's either become accustomed to it or he's actually dying this time. Again. His body is trembling from the pain and with the way his throat feels raw he thinks he's been screaming this whole time, and he just wants it to be over. Sorry Steve, he thinks. And then.

Fuck. Steve. Steve who is tied to the same freaky upside down shit Eddie is, who is probably about a foot away from him right now and going through something very similar if not the exact same thing.

Eddie pries his eyes a fraction of an inch open which forces out a guttural shriek at the burn raging in his skull, but can once again make out the vague shape of Max still holding him to her chest. There's two other figures of what Eddie assumes Steve and Dustin huddled together in front of him, someone's hand flexing and shaking over Eddie's leg. Another figure is crouched in front of them with one hand facing the pool and one hand towards all four of them. Supergirl.

Through shaking screams and burning skin, Eddie's eyes manage to clear a little despite the constant influx of tears overflowing to soothe the burn that doesn't seem to exist to anyone else. Supergirl is whipping her head between the group of them huddled on the ground and the edge of the pool, and with a scream she plunges one hand into the water and slaps the other on top of Steve's hand that's covering Eddie's shin.

Her fingers dig into Eddie's shin and imprint Steve's palm into Eddie's skin where his sweats have ridden up, and the sensation shocks a cold into his skin that pulses up his body like menthol and chili, the sensation enough to make him convulse inward. The striking cold scrapes along his skull, and suddenly Eddie can see again. The vague figures of traumatized teenagers snap into view and the water in his eyes clears after a second, and Eddie can see the moment it happens for Steve too. The agony on Steve's face smoothes into concern as Dustin keeps yelling likely non-urgent questions at him and shakes at his shoulder. The pain under Eddie's skin is still there, but the burning fires of hell have extinguished into a more manageable stove top fire mishap. His head is fogged and achy, but the ringing and sharpened static in his ears has faded to a manageable level where he can make out at least fifty percent of the noise around him.

Max must notice the difference since she removes her vice grip from his shoulders and leans over to scan across his face. He can see her getting ready to ask if he's okay when Supergirl lets out a howling shriek and throws her head back, crumpling in on herself yet keeping her arms strong against their skin and the water. Steve scrambles up first to Supergirl's side, casting a quick glance into the pool before muttering a string of expletives under his breath and turning to Eddie.

"I need your lighter," He says, and Eddie guesses his voice is in the same commanding urgency he uses everytime the world ends. Eddie shakily reaches a hand across the concrete and fumbles with the lighter a little, giving it a trembling toss over to Steve. Eddie notices the shaking in Steve's hands too, the residual coals left burning under their skin. Steve wastes no time getting to his feet, his balance slightly off kilter but putting no damper on the speed at which he rushes to the door and throws it open, careening to the right and into the kitchen.

Supergirl lets out another cry that pulls Max away from Eddie's side, Dustin already there with her by the edge of the pool. Eddie's pulse is jumping again as he notices the tinge of black around her fingertips, the way it courses ever so slightly up her veins. Steve appears again through the glass doorway with a can of cooking spray in one hand, Eddie's melted lighter in the other. Steve throws out an arm to shove the kids away from the edge of the pool as he crumples to his knees, slamming the cap of the spray on the ground to knock it off and flicking the spark wheel before spraying directly into the flame and emitting a giant fireball that flushes Eddie's face with heat.

Steve aims another fireball into the pool as Eddie struggles to get himself fully upright, clawing his way over to the edge with the rest of them. Supergirl is still letting out shrieks here and there, both her palms flexed towards the water with Max and Dustin holding her steady on either side. Eddie gets to the lip of the pool and peers over the edge to see some sort of bubbling sludge that he loathes to recognize. It's forming from what looks like three points, the dark matter forming tendrils that climb towards the surface, towards them. Steve shoots another stream of fire across the water and Eddie watches as the tendrils recoil and hiss from the sensation.

Steve shoves the can and lighter into Eddie's hands and fixes him with an urgent stare. "Keep spraying," is all he says before disappearing back into the house with his usual grace of a reformed jock. Eddie spots other tendrils rising from the depths of the water to join the surface, and aims his half empty bottle of cooking spray at the largest section, frantically flicking the wheel to spark it. The lighter sputters with a small spark, but no flame.

He strikes the wheel again. Spark. Sputter. Nothing.

Strike. Spark. Nothing.

Strike-

"What the fuck is taking so long, Munson?" Max hollers from beside him, her arms wrapped protectively around Supergirl's shoulders. Supergirl shrieks and the sludge hisses, shrinking a little.

"I'm fucking trying, okay?! It's finicky-" Eddie sparks the lighter two more times still with no luck before Max reaches over and snatches both the lighter and the cooking spray out of his hand. She strikes it twice, the lighter coming to life with a bright orange flame and fanning over the pool with a whoosh as she lets out a stream of cooking spray. She doesn't stop after one stream of fire, instead endlessly holding down the nozzle of the spray and effectively flambéing the matter bubbling on the surface of the water.

"Useless goddamn-" Max mutters as a tendril shrinks in on itself and melts in tandem Supergirl's yell. "-Everything myself," Max drops to her knees and sprays directly at the lip of the pool, burning off a trail of sludge that was trying to slither over. Eddie is terrified of her.

Steve bolts back out of the door with what looks like 2 cans of women's hairspray and another lighter. He barely spares a confused glance between Max and Eddie, but shoves a can at him anyways and flicks the lighter to life between them. Supergirl and Dustin are still slightly farther back in the middle of the group, Dustin practically holding her up as she slowly shrinks back the growing mass of tendrils. Max has worked her way to the edge on the left now, maniacal and determined in a way that makes Eddie think maybe she should talk to somebody about it.

Eddie and Steve stay on the right, Steve holding the lighter between them as he shoots a stream of fire into the middle. Eddie decides to shoot at the edges by the lip of the pool, the sludge still creeping out despite its mandatory near constant regeneration from the combination of the fire and whatever the fuck sort of telekinesis Supergirl is pulling off.

"Is this even gonna work?" Eddie yells, struggling to spray his hairspray through the flame instead of beside it due to their shared custody of the lighter.

"Fire's their biggest weakness, it's all we got," Steve's voice is crackly but still carries the urgency from before as he shoots out towards a tendril rising out of the water, effectively burning it in half as it crumples back to the surface.

There's a clinking noise to his left, and then, "Fuck!" As Max chucks her can to the side and lets it rattle against the ground. "I'm empty," She says, her face fear stricken with only a small facade over it as she glances between Supergirl still shaking against Dustin and Eddie across from her. Eddie hucks his can over to her and hears the almost empty rattle of the can in the wind.

"I'm almost out, but there's still a bit left," Eddie says as he stares into the pool, the mass of sludge smaller than when they started, but not small enough to take out with two half-empty cans of hairspray. Steve's can starts to sputter a moment later, Max's new can likely soon to follow. Steve curses under his breath and aims the last consistent spurt of hairspray at the middle of the mass, left only to shoot small bursts of fire until the can's empty.

"Shit, this one's running low too," Max has given up her tactic of one steady stream of fire in favor of small bursts similar to Steve, both of them shaking the can in between sprays. Eddie hears Dustin gasp to his left and turns just in time to see Supergirl lurch away from him and plunge her hands into the slime. Her fingertips flex at the edge of the sludge and it lets out a withering hiss at the contact, Supergirl seeming to feel the same painful connection as her shoulders seize up and she tosses her neck back.

"El!" Dustin calls and grips onto her shoulders to keep her from tipping into the pool, Supergirl clawing her hands in farther anyways. It rips a scream from her and it rattles in Eddie's ears, echoing off his skull. Her shriek cuts off with a gasp as her head drops forward and her arms go limp, the rest of the fire being sucked from the cans and into the mass of tendrils the second she drops. The suction makes Eddie's ears pop and he watches as the rest of the tendrils collapse in on themselves in a matter of seconds, endlessly folding together in a sick slide of black and blue until nothing remains in the pool. The last thing to disappear is three heavy black drops of slime closest to the edge of the pool, the droplets imploding and ceasing to exist.

The moment it's over both Steve and Max collapse at Supergirl's feet, Steve doing the primary flitting and worrying. There's a stream of blood trailing from her nose down to her chin and it's left spattered drops on the pavement. Her eyes are closed and she's panting against the embrace of Dustin and Max, Steve staying in front of her and tilting her head side to side, checking her fingernails and her pulse. Eddie stays awkwardly off to the side, opting instead to sit a couple feet away and attempt to compartmentalize the past ten or so minutes.

His skin feels fuzzy again, but moreso in a familiar anxiety way than an interdimensional way. He feels lost in the staticy feeling running through his body, letting his vision cloud a little and get lost in the now normal ripples of the water. He thinks he's breathing again.

Steve enters his field of vision, hands up like he's approaching a wild animal and pace slow and intentional. "You feeling okay?" He asks and all Eddie can muster is a nod in return. He looks over at Supergirl.

"She gonna be okay?" Eddie asks and lets himself relax a little at Steve's contented nod.

"Exhausted, definitely, but El'll be fine. We should get her somewhere safe though, who knows what else is tied to this place," Eddie's previous stare into the pool is echoed in Steve's face, both of their expressions a blank sort of anxious.

Steve tears his gaze away from the pool and towards Eddie, extending a hand to help him up. Steve's hand is warm in Eddie's when he takes it and lets himself be pulled up and into Steve's space, relishing in the closeness for only a second before stepping away. Now is most certainly not the time. Not that it would've been before, either. Steve coughs as Eddie steps back and gestures behind him, returning to El who's looking slightly more alert in Dustin and Max's arms, eyelids still heavy though and head lolling onto Max's shoulder. Steve says something to the three of them in a gentle and hushed tone that Eddie doesn't quite catch before scooping El up and tucking her into his chest to bring her inside.

Max and Dustin watch them go, Max getting up first and turning to look at Eddie. She sees the concern on his face before Eddie even realizes it's there, fixing him with a glare and stuffing her shaky hands into the pockets of her shorts.

"I'm fine," She says with a sneer and Eddie puts his hands up in surrender, watching her turn heel to follow Steve and El inside. Dustin does less to hide the fact that he's shaken up, getting up slowly from the ground and shaking out his arms. His breaths are trembling at the end of his exhales, and Eddie just wants to whisk each of these kids away from a seemingly endless childhood of Eldritch trauma.

Eddie gently wraps an arm around Dustin's shoulder, simply quietly giving him support as he lets the kid breathe. Dustin melts into his side, Eddie in turn just melting in general, and rubs circles into his back.

"Wanna go sit inside?" Eddie asks as hushed as possible, leaning in just for Dustin to hear. Dustin heaves another breath with a weak nod of his head and pulls away from Eddie but not out of arm's reach. Eddie offers a weak smile and a squeeze on the shoulder as they join the other's in the living room.

El is laid out on the couch with Max sitting on the floor next to her and dabbing at the blood drying around her nose, both with easy fragile smiles and gentle touches. Eddie does not let Max see him looking. Dustin joins them at the foot of the couch and Eddie stands awkwardly in between for a second before spotting Steve around the corner at the phone.

"...For the most part, yeah. I just don't want anyone staying here… Yeah of course… And I know that we're- well, thank you… Yeah. In about ten. Thank you so much," Steve hangs up with a click as he puts the handheld back down, wringing out his hands and then running them through his hair. He scrubs his hands down his face and takes a moment to breathe a heavy sigh before Eddie sneaks out a bit more from behind the corner to make himself known. Steve catches Eddie out of the corner of his eye and startles anyway with a small jump and a hand to his throat like he's a '50's housewife clutching his pearls. The gesture is both endearing and oddly fitting.

"Fuckin' scared me, man," Steve says and swaps his startled expression for an easy smile that makes Eddie's heart jump. "Just got off the phone with Robin, she's very nicely gonna let us stay at her's for the night despite not really knowing me here. Said her parents are out for dinner with friends and will likely end up crashing at a friend's house," Steve laughs and cards his fingers through his hair again. "She says they're more like teenagers than she is," Eddie gives a half-hearted smile that he tries to pass off as normal, but Steve's brow furrows at it. "You okay?"

Eddie worries his lip between his teeth and pointedly does not notice Steve glance down for a second. "It's just- do you think it'll follow us there? Like, it's tied to this house and probably mine, but also us, right? Is switching locations gonna be enough?" Eddie's voice comes out raw and full of worry despite his best efforts to keep it even, Steve grimacing at him.

"I don't know. But what I do know is we can't get back without El, and she needs rest. Our best bet is getting away from any sort of previous gate or tie to the upside down, and I think Robin is it. She didn't get involved until this year, and it was only ever at Starcourt, nothing happened at her home. Plus, she's far enough from any of the gates that I think it's probably our safest choice," Steve shudders and stares at his feet for a second, then turning an intense gaze to Eddie. "I can't guarantee any sort of total safety. But anything will be better than here for them."

Eddie nods and breaks the eye contact, Steve still staring for a second before dropping his eyes. He fiddles with the drawstring of his sweatpants and toes at the panels of hardwood before narrowing a determined gaze back on Eddie.

"Also I-" Steve swallows and makes an aborted movement towards Eddie, Eddie still just stuck staring and praying he isn't about to have the conversation he thinks they're about to have. He's about to get rejected for his weird almost-kiss and have to play it off like it was just end of the world jitters.

What? Why would you think I wanted to kiss you, Harrington? That was just an accident. You know, how you accidentally share tender and gentle kisses with people you've known for about a week and then have to save the world with?

"I just wanted to- uh…" Steve starts again with no more luck finishing his sentence than last time, just looking semi-awkwardly into Eddie's eyes. Eddie shuffles his feet a little and waits in awkward straight-dude agony for this to be over.

"You just wanted to…?" Eddie tries to help, rip off the bandaid if he must, but Steve just shakes his head and hums.

"Just- wanted to tell you to grab any stuff you need for the night, I'll go tell the kids and I'll meet you at the car," Steve doesn't look at him as he finishes the sentence, practically bolts past Eddie with a clap on the shoulder and rounds the doorway into the living room. Eddie tries not to let it sting too much as he trudges upstairs to retrieve his still sopping clothes. Fucking awesome. He managed to make Armageddon awkward.

_______

This fic is almost done! If i write something this long again I won't be uploading chapters to tumblr, but I will post the Ao3 links so keep an eye out for that.

TAG LIST (reply to be added): @estrellami-1 @melodymeddler @songbird-garden @gregre369 @croatoan-like-its-hot @messrs-weasley @bestwifehaver @mediguro @goodolefashionedloverboi @huniiibee @rhyswritesreadsandcries @i-have-three-feelings @mightbeasleep @grtwdsmwhr @hirikka @starlight-archer @clumsiluni @celestialrebel1 @quarble @woolley-socks

#steddie #stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie fanfic #steddie ficlet #steve x eddie #shovel writes

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may-alpenglow · 8 months ago

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(my power went out yesterday so i couldnt post. sobbing)

"Should you really be drinking this much caffeine?" Nalani looked at Santez with a concerned gaze. His brows furrowed together. "That's unhealthy."

"Unhealthy." Santez took such a huge swig of his coffee that some spilled on his shirt. He rolled his eyes so hard that maybe he'd be able to see his brain. "Health is just a concept. It can't hurt me if I don't believe in it."

Nalani blinked a few times. Was he being serious? Or an idiot? Maybe both. "Are you gonna say that about taxes, too?"

"I already do." A snarky grin set upon the other's face. He gestured his cup around, the liquid sloshing inside. "Guess who didn't pitch in for the rent last month. Bomb dropped."

"Oh my god." Nalani pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. He should've known by now that trying to waver Santez's beliefs was like fishing in a pool—a hopeless, foolish cause. He tried anyway, because having 700 miligrams every day was probably definitely a health hazard.

Oh, yeah. Health isn't real, apparently. It's just a social construct. A hoax created by the government.

Santez could sense the tension circulating through the air, and he set his cup down. "Look," he began, "I'm perfectly fine. I do cardio, and I lift in the form of dragging people's unconscious bodies back home. Don't even worry about me."

"I am worried." Nalani fidgeted with a loose thread on his shirt. His gaze softened, concern replacing the sternness that flashed in their eyes. "You could get hurt. I know it's not serious to you, but..."

"Yeah, yeah." Santez took a deep breath. He averted his gaze, opting to stare at the TV and nothing else. Nalani could see the conflict that wore on his face, and a bone-deep exhaustion that never seemed to go away. "I know. I'm fine," he paused, "but I guess you're right."

Nalani took a seat on the couch. He sat there, leg bouncing as he suddenly felt unsure of what to say. He didn't know how to convince Santez when he was so stubborn, but he didn't want to see him wind up in destructive behaviors. "How about you.."

"Sleep?" Santez raised an eyebrow.

Nalani nodded his head. "Mhm." An anxiety nestled itself into the corners of his mind. What if he was making things worse? Maybe he was being too overbearing. After all, it was just a few cups of coffee and some energy drinks. ...Everyday. Every hour.

"Eugh." Santez ran a hand through his dark curls and yawned. He cocked his head to the side, contemplation turning him silent for a beat. It was impossible to tell what he was thinking, or what he would do next. Eventually, he spoke. "I have so much work to do.."

"It can wait." The words felt weak on Nalani's tongue. He knew that he shouldn't talk, because he usually stayed up until morning when the house needed cleaning or if he wanted to train. "No pressure."

"Lots of pressure," Santez muttered. "You know what? Fine. Fine fine fine. Only if you tuck me in, though." He wiggled his eyebrows. Nalani thwacked him in the head with a throw pillow.

"No."

He ended up tucking Santez into bed. The latter had insisted on sleeping on the couch, even when everyone else found it quite uncomfortable. He was given extra pillows and blankets—they all belonged to Nalani, as he either got hot or cold way too easily. He had snuggled up into his monstrosity of blankets and sighed in contentment.

Nalani wished him a goodnight, and then bounded up to his room. A smile settled upon his face—he felt a bit proud that he convinced Santez to sleep, for once.

Now he was gonna get some rest himself. 12 hours worth, maybe.

#writing #drabble #oc #ocs #original character #beginner writer

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inconsideratekidney · 11 months ago

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9/5/24

hi there,

today felt long, even though my day technically ended at 1:45, my brain and body haven't felt well-rested since 2008. i will always be forever stuck in my younger self. i had so many american girl dolls, barbies, polly pockets, calico critters, one random strawberry shortcake phase, etc. and i still will forever miss them. my playing days didn't end in 2008, just the last time i probably felt well-rested.

i also wish that i had more mobility in my fingers, hands, wrists, and arms and neck/upper chest because i want to wear so much jewelry but it tends to cut off my circulation when i get hot and sweaty and it all starts to irritate me about halfway through my day. i enjoy wearing memorable pieces of jewelry and whatnot that people give me, i like to wear them every day to think of people, even if they don't match. every few days or so i need to rip them off and get acclimated for a day or so to not having anything obstructing my circulation. then i go back. it's a fun cycle, not a vicious one!

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i feel a headache coming on...must be all the sims and constant screen exposure for like 2 hours...

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speaking of which, my homework has been started since i sent that email out! i just also have my mind on other things....

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i'm excited about this direction for my blog! i hope it works out well, even though i know the notifications will be different. if you don't make an account then you can't turn on notifications which is annoying, unless someone knows a better way? i don't want to force people to make an account....

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i have found myself making friends with people that i am slightly uncomfortable with? i don't know how to word it, but i feel very overstimulated often with certain people and they seem to enjoy my company, but i am silently screaming. it's hard when someone is loud and does not whisper well when everyone else is quiet or the professor is lecturing and i am just trying not to get noticed......i notice with this kind of acquaintance i typically just go silent while theyre talking and develop lazerbeam eyes that look right through to the other side of them. i find it hard to communicate when im uncomfortable with something or something someone is doing, especially when im not that close with that someone.

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this is me from the future aka the next morning cuz i forgot to finishing writing. i dont want to do 2 day posts, bc that ruins the purpose of what im trying to achieve--once a day every day or every couple of days or once a week. not multiplr days on end. i already write a lot so i cant have multiple days in one post. i can feel myself wanting to start writing more but its only been like 12 hours since i last wrote so im gonna take a cooldown before doing that. (i will say tho sleeping on my back last night actually was so much better than my stomach and i went out like a light and only shifted in my sleep like 2 times)

anyshway, have a blessed day,

kD :p

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sebsxphia · 2 years ago

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Sebbie m'dear, I am but a simple moot popping in to say hello and wish you well 🥰🥰🥰🥰. It's a very lazy, hazy Sunday here in the US and almost the last week of August which makes me kinda sad since summer is my favorite season.

I know I pop in with a ton of Preacher!Rhett thoughts/thots but this one's kind of been on my mind most of the day and I can't help it (lol).

It's a very, very lazy, hazy Sunday afternoon and you and Rhett have gotten almost all of the things on your list of shit to do, out of the way so you and your little ones can all relax. Rhett kept his sermons short and to the point since it was boiling hot (literally all those windows in the church had to be opened because it's an old building with shitty air circulation and no central air except in the parish gathering room) and didn't wanna keep people for any longer than he had to.

You, Rhett and your babies all come home and you're enjoying the afternoon to the fullest. Rhett made them all apple cinnamon pancakes and were promptly scarfed down before the kids went outside to play. Your youngest was finally able to come home after having to be in an incubator for almost a month so he needs alot more attention than the older ones. Since you live in a super close knit community, the neighbors have eyes everywhere which allows the kids to go and ride their bikes anywhere they want (they're always telling their Daddy that they're gonna go and look for One-Eyed Willie's treasure and I firmly believe that Man of God or not, Rhett LOVES The Goonies and passed it on to the babies).

With school being right around the corner, Rhett packs up their backpacks with their materials and extra sets of clothes (since you both opted to send them to an outdoor type of school that has the kids outside and playing as much as possible) and by the end you're both so dead tired that you, Rhett and the baby are all snuggled together in the hammock, listening to the birds, breathing in the smell of the fresh cut grasses and the buzz of the cicadas/hot-bugs.

Rhett's in and out of sleep from how peaceful it is, a lazy smile on his face with you resting against him in your pretty blue and yellow gingham summer dress and your little boy snuggled on top of him and he's just grateful because he has you and the babies as a part of his life and every night he thanks God for the life he's been given.

hello my love! i hope you’re having a lovely, lazy, warm sunday in august! 🥹🥰

ohhhh and this thought is so, so sweet, soft, warm and comforting. lazy and slow sunday’s like this are my favourite and i love to think about them to warn off the sunday scaries 🥺

i’m melting! aaaaaah oh my love, thank you so much for this incredibly sweet thought my love! 💌

#💌you’ve got mail #auroralightsthesky <33 #rhett abbott #preacher!rhett abbott

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soobnny · 2 years ago

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Alright imagine a date with Jake where he takes you out on a picnic date with Layla and you're in your soft curls and a sun dress and he just can't help but think about when he's gonna marry you and have you be Layla's official mom. And then later he takes you home and y'all cuddle while you watch a movie and you fall asleep in his arms and he just melts and then the next day he buys a ring.

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk where I rambled about wanting a relationship. (Let's just have delusions for now)

no bc layla gets along with everyone but EVEN more with u like she honestly prefers u over jake bc she’s always begging for ur attention. the thought of co-parenting a pet (as if u aren’t already) is something that makes jake’s head short circuit tbh as does every single domestic thing u guys do .. no matter how little like when u fall asleep in his arms, he can’t help but think that he wouldn’t mind waking up to u in his arms for the rest of his life even tho it sometimes cuts his arm’s blood circulation

i honestly do think that little domestic and intimate moments like those would slowly grow and grow into him eventually proposing in a few years bc those kind of moments allow him a glimpse of what life would be like if u were Married

#soft hours 🤍!#this was so cute #and the specificity of it all omg #makes me think it’s one of those Thoughts u come back to before u go to sleep #i have a fair share of collections in my files too #jake x reader

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hartshorn-and-isinglass · 1 year ago

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Day 33.

Hello, Kreutzer etude #2. I did not miss you. And I can feel all the muscles in my left hand getting a workout.

It has been extremely cold the last few days; I've had a problem where I don't feel cold in my core but there's not enough blood circulating to my hands when I practice. I literally feel like I need a heated hand warmer or something to stick them in every few minutes. Really need to fix my shoulder rest so I can dress more warmly, lol.

Went down a rabbit hole trying to figure out bowing for 'A Country Dance' and ended up waaay overthinking it. I'm... I'm gonna put that away for a bit.

So: need to fix my shoulder rest, and I need to start making prototypes for my pinky. I have to cop to having a bit of anxiety about the prototyping now that I feel the weight of how crucial it's going to be for me, and I gotta just... I can't be looking at the stakes like that. I have to approach this with curiosity and an open mind.

#personal #marve won't shut up about violin

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allgrrl78 · 2 years ago

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Me Talking to the World

I think I’d be better as a best friend than a girlfriend, sometimes 😬

Like, if you want a girl who’s so glamorous, steps out in 5-inch stilettos, polished long nails and a face that’s really dolled up and effortlessly beautiful, wearing gorgeous hair and a dress that’s so elegeant - nah, that’s NOT me, hehe (although I appreciate women who are glamorous and take really good care of themselves).

I try to look decent… and my reason for exercising is really just to get the blood circulation going. My sense of adventure is in having deep conversation across the landscape of your mind.

Talk to me, debate with me, have coffee or a mojito with me, have a smoke with me, go on a road trip with me, have a food adventure with me, watch an outdoor concert with me, watch a live band with me, watch a movie with me, watch the stars with me, look for Venus or Saturn with me, maybe even sing with me. I’m a creature of comfort so none of those 10,000 steps a day activities with me.

I’m the girl in the dress in summer while the rest are in bikinis. I’m the girl driving a 20-yr old manual transmission car blasting indie songs. I’m the girl re-watching Sopranos and watching the non-popular but Oscar-worthy movies they won’t show on your local cinema. I’m the girl lining up in a museum to view art and history, and takes a thousand photos where only 1% gets posted on her Instagram account. I’m the girl who appreciates reels, Tiktok videos and Youtube shorts but will never make one. I’m the girl who tales candid photos of people she likes because it tells a story more than a posed one. I’m the girl who takes the back roads.

I try not to be a hypocrite. I hate crowds (except for concerts because we’re all united in appreciating the music), and get worn down by loud noise. I need time alone to recover but if I like the company, I can spend an entire evening out.

I can be sweet and appreciate sweetness in return. I appreciate intimacy but the moment I feel that you’re acting out your porn fantasies with me, I’m gonna buzz out. It makes it feel so arranged and unorganic. Ewww. What I find sexy is seeing someone passionate about their goals and aspirations - even if it means you’re busy half or even most of the time.

Unexpected and natural are what makes something memorable for me. Relaxed and comfortable? Ahhh, I’m in. And if there’s a lot of fun and funny conversations, I’ll never leave, hehe.

So, I’ll say hey… I’ll keep it casual. Because that’s the best version of me. The one that doesn’t overthink. Anything outside this sphere, and I become either detached or too bothered - the latter is what I hate the most.

I’m a girl who just wants to be happy with people who want me to be happy with them 😊

————

This piece is written for me to go back to whenever I feel like I’m not myself anymore.

#who am i #doyorselp2024 #gen x

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fushipurro · 2 years ago

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Lessons in Love

Chapter 2 - Love & War

<- Previous Chapter | Masterlist | Next Chapter ->

☆ Content: 18+ MDNI, f!reader, mma!toji, jjk au, pet names, roommate!satoru, roommate!suguru, mma!sukuna, foreplay (vaginal), creampie, biting/sucking/hickies, age gap (10 years), mentions of violence, blood, and abuse, jealousy/angst, fluffy caretaking toji, kinda mean/insecure toji, jealous reader.

☆ Word Count: 5.6k

"baby, m' fuck─ gonna cum."

your legs tightly around his waist, nails clawing into his muscular back moaning, "please─ god fuck, fill me, toji!" worshipping your names together and each other's bodies. toji's warmth blanketing your velvet walls with no room to spare, his fingers making sure every last bit remained inside you.

"that's my pretty girl, savor every bit." he coos, hunched over caressing your cheeks as sweat falls from his raven hair. toji could be rough and physically demanding, but his aftercare with you was a different story. it had to be though, seeing that this was the fourth round of the morning. it was, at least as far as you could remember after drowning in each other.

"so what are you doing today, toji? I was thinking we go hit up that new─"

"sorry, gotta train today." toji handed you a towel while cleaning himself off, putting his pants back on while you laid there naked, watching him.

"I thought your next match wasn't for a few weeks still? least that's when you usually start your extreme prep regime."

he was quiet for a moment as he finished dressing himself in your favorite black sweats of his. "still gotta train though, princess. don't have time to write your book for ya."

you looked at him with a confused expression, "what's that supposed to mean?"

by now toji was practically biting his tongue with regret, "nothin', just forget it. go enjoy yourself today and I'll see you later."

you spent the rest of your morning resting, finally getting ready by mid afternoon. one of your favorite places to write was a local panera bread in a quiet booth working away on your laptop, meals or drinks at the ready.

thanks to toji's help, your recent novel has been circulating as a bestseller. for the past few months you've continued to see him as a couple, while also enjoying his mma matches that were really taking off in popularity. lately however, he's been a bit distant of sorts. toji still maintained seeing you and your usual activities, but seemed to also be withholding some secrets that made your gut wrench thinking about. after this morning, writing wasn't exactly setting your mind straight.

"hmm, i guess i could bring him some lunch, he might like that."

you ordered him his sandwich of choice from the bakery and made your way over to the jujutsu gym. inside were several fighters you've seen from previous matches, but toji was nowhere to be seen.

"can i help you, miss?" a voice came from behind you. you were greeted by a man in a suit, cigarette between his lips.

"hi, i'm looking for toji? i brought him some lunch for his training."

"toji? ah, you must be his girlfriend. i'm shiu, his manager, but i'm afraid he's not here."

as if things weren't already a little weird, now you can't help but question the truth of what he's telling you. a helpless insecurity that began to gnaw away at you. this was the only place he did his training, his own apartment was just for sleeping and storage.

"oh haha, must've gone home then, thanks for the help and nice to meet you, shiu!"

you walked away waving before he could reply, leaving shiu puffing smoke into the air amidst the sounds of others hard at work. sure he might've known what toji was up to, but last thing you want to be is perceived as some clingy stalker girlfriend.

later on in the evening, you bided your time with your weekly drama shows. toji said he'd see you later after all, even if he wasn't sleeping over, he'd probably want to eat something together eventually, especially after a day of training. your phone finally buzzed with the very man you desired to hear from, gleaming eyes quickly shut down.

toji zenin can't make it tonight, sorry doll sent: 6:24pm

y/n fushiguro it's alright, you okay? sent: 6:24pm

an hour went by, but still no response. nerves starting to get the better of you.

maybe he's just resting after training...

another hour gone, still nothing. you ended up eating the sandwich you got for him before it could go stale and got ready for bed. that night dragged on as sleeping felt impossible. in no way do you want to be the jealous girlfriend, but intrusive thoughts can be a bitch when the other party is lacking in communicating.

there you were, walking alone on a downtown street late one evening, missing your boyfriend. you stopped to admire the shops around you, looking up from the frosted windows to see toji walking in your direction and laughing with a beautiful woman glued to his side.

"toji, hi!" you said, trotting up to him with a cautious smile at the girl.

"um, who's this?" the woman sneered to toji. she made no effort to hide the disgust written all over her face.

toji gave a sadistic smile, gripping the girl closer, "just one of my old pets, doll." your smile faded and you began to tear up, backing away slightly from the couple.

"ew, is it really crying?"

"pathetic, right?" he laughed, looking down at you with darkened eyes, "better run along, you're spoiling our date."

the two shoved you aside, leaving you on the snowy walkway with tears streaming down your face, watching the man you deeply admired walk away like you were nothing and everything leading up to now was all for naught. your voice left whimpering until the image faded to black and suddenly the white ceiling in sight above and the sun peeking between your curtains.

"fuck, it was just a dream." you reached up to your wipe your face, the tears from what you saw still falling from your eyes onto your sheets. reaching for your phone, it didn't help that there still wasn't any response from toji, only a message from your roommate, suguru, that breakfast was covered in the microwave for you whenever you got up.

today was spent being even less productive than yesterday. more time watching tv and sappy romance movies than working on your next bestseller. nothing pulled you away from the comfort of your living room sofa. every movie you watched had you imagining you and toji together in place of the characters. a cycle of daydreams all ending with the same flashback to the nightmare from earlier.

god, what am i doing with myself, i really am pathetic...

a knock sounded from your front door, you ignored it at first as you weren't really expecting anyone. toji typically lets you know ahead of time he's coming and your roommates have keys so who could it be? the knocking continued until you begrudgingly stepped over to answer wrapped in a blanket. opening the door to reveal the very man whose body you know oh so well.

"took ya long enough, you tryin' to ignore me?"

"you ignored my message first," you didn't wait to see his reaction, instead pouting as you walked back to the couch, door left ajar for toji to enter behind. he remained quiet as he followed you inside. back down in your spot, movie now resumed, you felt toji kneel into the back of the sofa behind you, his head nestled on your shoulder.

"what's wrong, princess? tired of me already?" he whispered in your ear, sending a shiver of goosebumps down your neck.

"n-nothing, was just worried when i didn't hear from you."

the man started twirling strands of your hair around his fingers and admiring the color. "m' sorry, doll. training was rough and i fell asleep right after i texted ya."

"i went to bring you lunch yesterday though and your manager said you weren't there." you voice was quiet and slightly hoarse after the on and off crying. toji moved around the couch, taking a spot next to you pulling you closer to him.

"y/n, what's really bothering you?" his large fingers delicately brushing your hair back to reveal more of your pretty face to his green and hungry eyes.

you couldn't make eye contact out of fear you'd turn inconsolable, but you softly replied back, "i-i just missed you and i... feel like there's something you're not telling me, toji."

he pulled you into his lap with your legs draped over his, letting your head rest against his chest. "like what?"

"i don't know... i had a bad dream last night that you left me for someone prettier..." you mumbled near the end, terrified to say the thought out loud even as you were wrapped against him leaking tears onto his sweatshirt.

"that's what this is about? a bad dream?" his deep voice was delicate against your hair while one of his thumbs rubbed a spot on your arm in circles. "you think i'd cheat on you like some bastard, y/n?" he sighed.

you began to lean up to look at his face, "then why are you being so secreti─ toji, what the fuck happened!" his cheeks were bruised and cut up, moving your eyes over the available skin and finding more.

leaning back up away from him slightly, toji sighed and leaned his head against his knuckles, "it's nothing serious, doll. it was just training."

"training? you expect me to believe all that came from training and i shouldn't worry?" now you were more angry than hurt, never in recent times had you seen him like this. hell even after his matches he didn't look remotely similar to this. "you look like someone mugged you and didn't bother fighting back!"

toji hissed, "as if i'd let some punk think they could steal from me," his hand moved to rest on top of your head trying to reassure you with a chuckle, "i fought in a few matches is all."

"matches? but that wasn't until a few weeks from now, right?"

"publicly, yeah, but those aren't the only fights i compete in."

your shock now turned to confusion over the sudden confession. you settled down and crept back against him.

"what do you mean?"

"listen, princess, it's better ya don't know."

"i'd like to know, toji." you pouted, the man returning your pout with another sigh. "please?"

"it's just some underground fighting, a way to let off steam and make some extra money. if i told ya then you'd be begging to come and it's not safe for ya."

"what's wrong with the regular fights you already do? doesn't seem like this is worth it given how you look right now..."

your fingers began tracing over some of the bruises available to you, the man watching you carefully and enjoying the touch of his private nurse.

"i make more money winning fights down there than i do in front of flashing cameras acting like some celebrity. don't gotta care about rules either."

"take me wi─" you started,

"no," only to be shut down immediately.

"please, toji?"

the man pouted and crossed his arms, "if i let you come, and i mean if, you will be a good girl and stay with me or shiu at all times. understand?"

"it's a promise, so when are we going?"

he rubbed his eyes with his hands while sighing, as he went to respond, a growl from your stomach interrupted.

"well aren't you a needy girl today. still got the food you wanted to give me yesterday?"

your eyes down and away, "...no i ate it."

"i'll order some delivery then," he reached over to you and pulled you onto his lap facing him with his hands on your hips, "in the meantime, princess, we have some making up to do for last night. gotta remind that pretty head of yours that you're my only girl." toji curved his head as he pulled you closer to meet his lips.

that night became one of the few times you hoped the delivery driver would never make it to you. your time was spent making love all over your bedroom in more positions that'd put even the kama sutra to shame. walls echoing each other's name, bodies embracing the pure ecstasy of the union of flesh and seed.

even as you received your food from the driver and signing any receipts, the two of you could hardly be pulled apart. hidden by the thickness of the door was the man who couldn't keep his hands off of you while your goal was simply to act like there wasn't the biggest dick imaginable buried inside you. the hardest part proving to be actually getting back to your room to eat, as toji had you bent over the couch so you both could reach your final climax of this round before you were able to replenish yourself with some dinner. thank god your roommates weren't home so they couldn't bear witness to your freedom and a love so overwhelming intense.

"so this is the underground arena?" it was jaw-dropping and not what you expected compared to the prior matches you've witnessed. big stone steps leading down to a metal fence wrapped in barbed wire. there were a large crowd of shady individuals here, men of all ages, many in suits and others with hoods.

"remember what i said, princess."

toji was showing off a different side of himself tonight, more stern and hot-headed, but he kept a close eye on you while sandwiching you between him and his manager until you were seated down on a cold slab of concrete for the night. the older man made his way off to get ready for his match, hardly saying a word to you the entire time.

well i can see what he means about the gambling hobby

everywhere you looked were employees taking bets at each aisle like a hotdog salesman. announcers were discussing the bigger rewards overhead and more importantly, the title match of the night being the current champion sukuna, the king of the underground, versus yours truly, toji.

it was easy to see why toji didn't want you there in the first place, you were a delicate flower blooming in a concrete jungle smeared with blood and bone fragments. he wasn't kidding either about there being no rules, the fights you witnessed were brutal. some fighters going so far as to use shivs or brass knuckles, others using the barbed fence to their advantage. doesn't matter if one person was on the floor surrendering, no referee dared step inside the cage of thorns. the crowd drowning out your own thoughts with screams as though this was a show of gladiators in a modern day colosseum.

"don't worry about toji, this isn't his first fight." shiu's voice whispered in your ears, pulling your head back from the surrounding chaos.

"is it really worth it to be here? i swear some of these people aren't leaving the arena alive..."

the man next to you took a puff of his cigarette as he kept his gaze ahead at the cage, "in toji's case, the money he makes off bets outweighs the risks. not a lot of people come close to his level and experience and the patrons here know that. unregulated venues make for higher payout over hollywood wrestling."

"i guess..." you wanted to refute more, concerned for his safety. toji was making a name for himself publicly so surely he needn't spend time with this crowd. it bothered you though that he remarked this place as one where he could blow off steam. he wasn't one to talk much about his past, always changing the conversation before it could get too deep.

it was nail biting waiting for the fight to begin. it was the highlight of the night so they saved it for last to rack up as many bets as they could. you thought the noise of the underground was loud earlier but once the fighters made their appearances, it became deafening until the fighters made their place inside the cage. the air became a stand still with two brutes staring each other down.

the bell rang and the fighters sprang at each other, sukuna dawning a horrifying grin as he made contact. toji's fangs bearing back, no hit came without revenge being given. neither side used weapons like previous fighters, only the strength and skill they've accumulated from years of training. all you were able to do was bite your lip and dig your heels into the stone below, praying that toji would be safe. blood flew everywhere after every hit, neither fighter refusing to give up as they ruthlessly fought like hyenas for scraps.

the crowd was ravenous, screaming the names of whoever their bets aligned with to finish the fight already. both fighters becoming exhausted of their energy to continue, their smiles faded and dripping red. you noticed toji's eyes slip to meet yours before sukuna lunged himself at the distracted man to try and secure victory. toji refused to give in, his raw strength flipping sukuna and nailing him against the floor until. he surrendered.

the building ran silent for a moment before chaos resumed in cheers for toji, your heart relieved and happy that he won and could still stand up on his own.

"let's go before it turns into a mob." shiu's voice in your ears once more as you got up to follow him. the surrounding crowd becoming an overbearing wave that pulled you away from shiu. your voice unheard, shiu getting further and further away in the crowd unable to reach you. eventually making it out to one of the hallways leading towards an exit. many still inside claiming the fruit of their bets, others left hungry and pissed in the hall.

suddenly an arm gripped yours from the crowd, "you lost, little girl?" you turned hoping it someone you recognize, but your stomach dropped seeing toji's opponent trying to pull you closer to him. "i see why toji got distracted near the end, you'd make a better prize."

you pulled back, wishing to get away, the fear caging your voice from protesting. the man's other arm reached further towards you, closing your eyes to what you thought was about to happen. all of a sudden the tension on your wrist was gone and you fell to the ground. opening your eyes, toji was in front of you attempting to choke sukuna.

"the fuck ya think you're doing touching my girl?" he growled. blood was still smeared on toji as though he hadn't had a moment to get cleaned before trying to find you.

"oi oi, you already won the money, do you really need that little plaything too?" he narrowed his eyes and smiled back at toji, "we can always fight over it some other day, but good luck winning next time. i won't go easy on you." toji released his grip on the man, still snarling as sukuna exited.

"toji, thank god, i was worried about you─"

"what'd i tell you about going off on your own?" visibly angry and shouting, his fangs now were directed at you.

"toji, i was with shiu but the crowd─"

"this ain't like one of your books where everything works out, princess. you don't know what the people here are capable of."

nothing you were saying had an effect on the man, it was upsetting to say the least and you've had enough of this treatment.

"i'm going home, congrats on winning, toji." you turned away, teary eyed and pushing your way to the exit with newfound resolve.

"fuck─ y/n, come back." he kept pace with you, "i'm sorry, doll, please wait."

"i'm sorry but no, i want to go home." you met his eyes with teary daggers, "i thought you were different, toji, but clearly you aren't." the look you gave him shattered him. never did he think something like this would affect him the way it is.

your arm was gripped once more out in the street with calloused fingers, but this time your body knew it was toji's. you stood there, not turning to face him while you softly whimpered.

"you can be mad at all me all ya want, but you're not going home by yourself. i will not allow it regardless of how much you want to kick and scream."

it was futile to fight so you just nodded and followed him back to his car. the drive home was silent, your eyes wandering the different stores and street lamps illuminating the falling snow. toji sighed frequently, words lost on him, gripping the shifter with his veiny arm and gnawing on his lip. he wanted to follow you into your apartment, hoping there'd be some form of forgiveness, but instead you closed the door behind you, "goodnight, toji."

wasn't long before you could hear him cursing himself behind the door and nearly breaking a hole into your neighbors wall. he didn't want you there with him tonight to begin with so you could be safe but instead you witnessed him at his worst and now he's left to wonder if you'll ever speak to him again or if he's fucked the only good thing he has going for good.

awoken from his slumber, toji grunted in pain, both physically and in his chest. his first thought about you, wondering if you were okay and still upset. he rolled over to check his phone, but of the few names plastered on the screen, none of them were yours. the older man went about that first day cleaning off all the dried blood from his skin and the stained sheets he collapsed in upon arriving home last night. toji periodically checked his phone, hoping you were just sleeping in, but hours went by and not a peep arose from the device. the wait was agonizing.

the next day was all the same, he kept his device at arms length waiting to see the photo of you and your pretty smile appear so he can finally hear your voice again. the man vented his frustrations by working out his sore body and daydreaming on the couch of his apartment. he wanted to respect your space, but he desperately was starting to miss you.

fuck, look what you're doing to me, princess. i don't deserve any bit of you, you're too good for someone like me.

day three came and the image of you in tears refused to leave his vision. he wanted so badly to crush his phone each time he looked but didn't see your name but he had to fight the urge. how else would you be able to reach him if he didn't have a working phone? how on earth would he be able to make it up to you?

please call me, doll, i'm sorry i made ya cry.

day four and toji finally decided this was the day he's had enough. he picked up his phone and tried to call you only to be hit with your voicemail. a few texts here and there throughout the day asking, no, pleading, just to talk to you. to hear your voice again and know things were going to be okay again. toji even showed up to your apartment around dinner, praying that maybe you'll be more open if he could treat you again like before. your roommates refused to budge and wouldn't let him enter, claiming you weren't there or that you didn't want to see him. not that toji believed any of it, knowing how protective satoru and suguru get over you. not when he could see your shoes in the entry past the two guards. he cursed two and begged for you, hoping you'd hear him and come running out like always.

i miss you so much, love. i'm sorry for being so stupid.

the next few days were miserable. it was a realization how smitten toji was for you. someone whose life has been so cold and lonely, intermittently filled with gambling or one night stands. the abuse he suffered growing up to become a vicious bastard of a man. you changed that for him. you appeared in his life as a ray of hope for someone with no self-respect. someone who wasn't faking a smile or laugh. someone who only wanted him for who he truly could be with the right help to see that. someone who loved him for him, flaws and all. toji would shatter all the bones in his body if it meant getting to see you again so he could tell you how much you mean to him.

please, y/n...

on the night of the seventh day, his phone finally shined with the familiar photo of you he craved with all his being.

y/n fushiguro meet me at the park, i need to see you sent: 10:56pm

needless to say, the man burned the rubber off his tires to get to you as fast as humanly possible. it was snowing again this night, gathering on the ground around, white as far as you could see. thankfully the park was quiet, only your two souls rested beneath the lanterns. his eyes finally caught sight of you sitting on a bench wrapped in your favorite coat and a scarf he bought for you. toji rushed forward nearly out of breath to meet you.

"y/n, listen, i'm sor─"

"toji." your voice silenced his. he stood in front of you, green orbs glued to your face. "i'm sorry for ignoring you, i needed the space a-and i had a deadline for my book you think is stupid to work on."

toji's eyes widened and he bit his lip trying to remain silent as you stood up and softly grabbed his shirt, teary eyes attempting to meet his.

"i wanted to see what you were fighting all by yourself. i begged for you to take me and i tried to do as you said."

"i know, i know, sweetheart." he calmly replied, his arms trying to reach around your shoulders to pull you in for a hug.

"i'm sorry i got lost and you needed to save me, but i was worried you know! it was frightening down there and i wanted to know that you were okay! i wanted to show you that i'm there for you for everything!"

his calloused fingers weaved through your hair, clutching your head closer to his chest and resting his chin on top of your head. "i know, sweetheart, i'm sorry for being an ass to ya. i shouldn't have brought you there."

"no, toji! don't you get it yet? i don't care how scary things are if i'm with you. i know you'll keep me safe. you think it's a stress relief down there, but i don't want you to fight these things alone when you don't have to. i'm right here so just talk to me, please!" your voice cracking between your tears, refusing to let go of toji now that the two of you were united again.

"i can live with you fighting down there, i trust you. but don't you dare shut me out."

"i'm so sorry, princess."

your weight fell deeper into his arms, attempting to pull him down with you to the ground.

"y/n?" toji asked, tilting your head up to see your eyes closed and cheeks blushing red. he moved his hand to your forehead, realizing how feverish you were. "shit!" he hissed, lifting your limp body into his arms and rushing back to his car with you. toji carefully sped his way back to his apartment with you. glancing over at each red light, realizing now that you were dressed in pajamas underneath the jacket and probably freezing your ass off because of him. your emotions he caused led you to overwork yourself to the point of being sick. it killed him to think how he stood around waiting for his phone to ring when you might not have been even able to. biting down on his lips and cursing himself for being such a fool. he took you for granted and paid a price he'll always regret for hurting you.

toji wasted no time in getting you up into his apartment and deep under his bedsheets. he wasn't sure the best way to help you out, questioning if whatever action he took would hurt you further than the damage he already did to you. he tried wiping you down with a warm washcloth, dressed you in one of his sweaters with an ice pack over your head. he laid in bed with you, afraid to touch you until your body seemed to instinctively roll over to clutch his. your head resting on his chest, a lullaby beating from his core directly into your ears. his arm now held you close to him, fingers teasing and trailing through your hair and down the side of your body. toji's eyes never leaving your body for a second until his vision blurs and fades into the night.

toji was the first to wake up the next day. oh so happy that you were still tight around him, drooling onto his body. he checked your temperature with his hand.

thank fuck it's better now, i'm so sorry baby

he carefully caressed your body once more. as much as he desired to stay like this forever, never leaving your side again, toji also couldn't wait for you to awaken so he could hear your voice ringing in his ears once more. but what would you say? would you still be upset at him? his heart fluttered when you finally began to stir, yawning as you looked up to meet his gaze with your own tired eyes.

"t-to..ji?"

"i'm here, sweetheart."

your hand reached up until your thumb could rub along the scar on his lip, "i love you."

toji was shocked, his lips parted with your finger remaining on the piece of his troubled past. after a moment he softened up and reached for your own face and smiled sweetly.

"i love you too, y/n."

finally your expression returned to the one he loved most. the pure hearted smile that drew him to you in the first place. the sun chose that perfect moment to illuminate your bedroom, radiating your beautiful features and reflecting rainbows off droplets of drool still creasing the corner of your lips. he couldn't take it anymore and rolled you onto your back so he could dangle himself above you.

toji looked deeply into you with such a fond expression, your hands cupping each side of his face as he met his lips with yours. that moment was everything. two loves finally together again, your taste mingling with his as you whimpered his name with such pretty soprano moans. hands reaching around his neck, forcing him deeper into you as your legs rubbed against his.

"i'm sorry, love." he said between kisses. "i'm a broken man and i don't deserve you, but i'm selfish and need ya to stay with my, my beautiful girl."

"i know, honey. i want you forever and always." his lips continued pursuing yours, moaning your name over and over with every breath he took. "you deserve to be happy as well, no matter what anyone else thinks."

"my pretty girl," toji praised, flushing his digits into your soaked body. he marked your chest up with his love, "i'll never hurt you again."

"i know you won't, toji."

he slipped off your panties and positioned himself at your hips, resting his quivering cock on your pearl. "please fuck me, toji." he smiled back at you, pressing into you until you to meet his hilt with your body.

"good girl, sweetheart, shit─"

his pace slow at first, worried he'd set back your recovery if he pushed you too much. you nodded and told him it was okay, begging him to go faster as he teased your g-spot with his tip. toji was normally rough but today was not one of those days. today was about making you feel better, making you feel all the love he should've been giving you.

your hips grinded against his every motion, reaching your arms up above your head desperate to dig your nails into something.

"oh fuck, toji, m' cummi─" you squealed.

"let it out baby, shit─ i'm right here with ya."

your back arched, lost in the feeling of each other's love overflowing inside. toji wasted no time continue his advances in you, a myriad of wet squelches and joyful screams. it felt so good to be together again and you never wanted to let this moment go.

when you were all done and tired, he cleaned you up first, delicately kissing every spot he claimed on your body as his. he got back in bed with you after and rested his head against your chest to hear your heart, finally opening up about his past to you as you toyed with his hair. you realized it's gotten longer since the time you first met him, but you loved it all the same and wouldn't change a thing. happy now that he listened and wasn't shutting you out.

"i'm sorry i've been dissing your books, princess." all those previous comments were the result of lack of self-respect and doubts feeding his insecurity.

"it's okay, toji, i forgive you."

"i love you so much, y/n."

you kissed the top of his head in response, "and i love you too, toji."

☆ Notes: was listening to this song & this as well as some toji tiktok edits like this and it got me craving some angst to evolve my fic's relationships. i've never written jealous angsty stuff before so hopefully it's fine and not like accidentally red flaggy... (autism makes it confusing sometimes for me) on a side note though, i think "call me" from blondie would be a fitting song to fuck toji to. lastly, if you're curious, the car of my choice for toji here is a 68' dodge charger simply because i went to homecoming in one back in high school and it was cool af! hope you enjoyed and thanks for reading, it was a little self indulgent at times i'm sure but i spent a lot of time on it and i'm happy with the result.

☆ Taglist: @lynnsemptymind

#toji fushiguro #jjk #jjk toji #jujutsu kaisen #jjk au #jjk smut #toji fushiguro x reader #toji smut #toji x female reader #toji x you #toji fushiguro x you #toji zenin #toji x reader

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