#thoughts on the matter somewhat complicated. nevertheless

[deliriousblue]

campy romcom shakespeare adaptation about assassins involving heavy themes of coercion with homages to gay porn sprinkled in for flavor. very genuinely no one is doing it like jojo tichakorn

[gotham-daydreams]

Lmao posting pure nightmare fuel without even a “hi, how are you?” after an entire month is one way to announce your return on Tumblr

How would reader be treated after they’re kidnapped?

LMAO YEAH- I fear that'll become somewhat common... I apologize! Though really, I hope y'all have been okay and I'm sorry for dying off the face of the planet as per usual... :']

Though, as for your question... it's a little complicated! Especially with how things end up going.

Some members of the family will definitely try to be more 'light' and understanding - as in most will let you get away with saying and doing some things here and there as long as you don't flat out leave or anything.

Sure, their feelings will get hurt if you insult them or get pissed at them in general (and rightfully so), but they'll take it as long as you stay. They are very, very desperate.

I can't say things will be good for... many reasons outside of the obvious, and that will become more clear once Chapter 4 is posted, and I mean very, very clear (you won't be able to miss it, trust me)- but they'll still try.. mostly because they're pathetic and very desperate like that LMAO

'Try' as in some will act like nothing happened, and try to pull the 'happy family' act which will work as well as you think. They'll be softer, more 'accepting' of any and all venomous words you'll throw at them (as in they'll just tolerate it), but they'll try to not do anything to make you more pissed off, and truly try to be a good family- which might piss you off more depending on who ya are, and their attempts are still more self indulgent more than anything as they are yanderes. Nothing they do is truly for your own good, comfort, or pleasure. It's all about them and trying to lessen the guilt they feel, along with fulfill that sense of obligation and so on-

Basically, don't trust it, it is very self indulgent no matter what, even if you also technically get something good out of it. Though at least you get something... better than nothing, right?

Just don't let them know that, they'll definitely try to do that more. The more you think of the good, the more (they're hoping) you'll associate it with them (even subconsciously), and... well...

It's all down hill from here, folks!

Nevertheless, expect some sparks of life here and there, I'm sorta back but sort of not- though I am trying to get back into the swing of things, especially with some personal projects i have in mind that (in my opinion) are much bigger than the Not [ ] Series, and much more thought out. Believe me, that thing is only a taste of what's to come :]

[g0dspeeed]

For Cappie and Eli - Write about one member of your ship asking the other to dance with them.

Thank you! This took forever, but I had to get it right 💕

Jacob Seed was never a dancer. Nope. He would play along for a little bit, humor her advances, but in the end he wouldn’t follow through. The stoic man was many things–many sensitive and complicated things–but someone who enjoyed a dance floor and the inevitable attention that came with it? No, that wasn't Jacob Seed in the slightest.

John Seed though, he was a dancer. Graceful, confident, but like with other close, vulnerable matters, to dance with John felt off-kilter. There was an insincerity to it, she felt, as if that charismatic man with the pretty eyes and pearly smile was performing some unspoken expectation. Even with body against body, the dance could be sensual on the outside yet feel so hollow within. John tried, in his own way. She could give him that. Perhaps she only hoped that the dancing would stop when the music did.

Which brought Cappie De La Costa to her current conundrum: Who was Eli Palmer? Did he dance?

In the few months that they were a “thing”, Cappie regarded Eli as somewhat of a boy scout. He was wholesome with grit. Eli was kind, compassionate, a bit shy, but when it came to protecting his rights or withstanding pressure from the Powers That Be, Eli wasn't afraid to speak his mind. Cappie watched him argue with Deputy Hudson once, talking circles and circles about property rights and the Second Amendment in a voice dripping with righteous conviction until poor Hudson threw up her hands and stormed off. Reserved, too, in a somewhat paradoxical way, but nevertheless Cappie liked to coax him out of his comfort zone as often as Eli did her with their long hikes about the Whitetail Mountains.

But she wouldn't push it too hard, not with dancing. Why? Cappie couldn't quite say. She could hazard that her recent romantic relationships left her insecure, jaded. She was less sure-footed in navigating what was and wasn't worth trying with her new boyfriend. So why push it? 

Why risk ruining a good thing?

As Cappie spiraled in the anxious pits of her own mind, Eli observed her wash down the bartop with vigor, a lukewarm beer bottle pressed to his lips. The bartender and the Whitetail leader were alone at the Spread Eagle, the pleasant quiet allowing her brain to rack up more uncertainties when it came to one Eli Palmer, and for Eli to appreciate her face under the glow of warm, bar light.

Then, a long sigh left Cappie. She could feel his eyes, those dark, lovely things, lingering on her face. His attention brought no anxiety, just something else that made her heart flutter.

“Quit it,” she muttered as a blush bloomed on her cheeks."

“No. I don't think I will.”

She didn't need to look at him to know that Eli was smiling.

“Thought you said tonight wasn't so bad?” he reflected. “Didn't seem too busy.”

“It wasn't. Just, I dunno, thinkin'. That's all.”

A heavy pause followed. She tried to look busy, her hands flitting about the bar to organize glasses and liquor bottles as nonchalantly as possible. In the wake of her killing that conversation, Cappie heard a small hum and wood creak. She looked up to observe Eli crossing the space, stopping before the bar’s old jukebox. The planes of his face, the hooded eyes and the straight slope of his nose, were illuminated by soft, yellow neon. Cappie took a moment to gaze at his figure, those broad shoulders, a strong back, those taught legs made for hiking, jumping, and climbing in the wilderness. That firm ass.

His voice, a laxed timber made lower by the hour and the mood, blended with the hard clicking of jukebox buttons.

“Who puts the music on this thing?” 

“Um, I think your boy Wheaty does,” answered Cappie. “Think Casey makes him food as payment.”

Another hum, then Eli moved to fish through his camouflage jacket. She smirked.

“If ya need a quarter–”

“‘M good,” said Eli, the found coin slotted into the machine before she could argue. He clicked a button.

A funny smile spread across her lips when a beat rapped through the empty bar, a sort of building rhythm with a snare drum, steady and promising something good. Eli turned around to meet her stare, his head bobbing to the beat. 

“Oh yeah?” chided Cappie. 

“Yeah,” answered Eli, his brown eyes skirting away from her hazel even as he crossed back over to her. His own cheeks spoke of some embarrassment, pinked sweetly like her care for him, but when his beautiful eyes returned to meet her, Cappie could see that fire inside them, burning hotter than ever.

His beer was set aside, leaving his hands free to wander. They took her hand, a silent request to abandon her duties in favor of walking more to the center of the bar with him, his hands calloused but tender in their touch. Her heart raced like wild horses.

“You don't, you don't dance,” she mused in a whisper, the way Eli brought her closer to his body a bit distracting. 

With a hand on her hip, Eli looked thoughtful.

“Nope."

They swayed for a moment, slow despite the lively song he selected. Cappie savored the warmth of his eyes, the shy smile that teased his lips. Her own smile was spread across her face, awestruck and nervous, as if he was about to end the charade at any second.

“Ain't a dancer,” went on Eli. “But I'll dance with ya, Cap.”

“Why?”

The question fell out of her mouth before she could check herself. It was out there, and Cappie needed to know–

“‘Cause I like ya, that's why,” Eli said with a small chuckle, flavored by nerves. “Might not be as good as you, but I'd like to be, gorgeous.” 

Despite whatever anxiety he felt, Cappie beamed. Eli grinned when Cappie pulled away to spin, their fingers twisting so to not let one another go until she curled back against him for a kiss.

✨

And here's the song playing on the jukebox

[reginrokkr]

◟༺✧༻◞ Book of Esoteric Revelations / Book of Revealing.

...read countless volumes here. It appears that these books were left behind by an ancient order... Kingdoms rise and fall, and when a civilization is annihilated, a new one will be born after from the ashes, which these books refer to as "Fortuna"... It's somewhat rudimentary, but theoretically at least, it bears striking resemblance to the computational scheme I have formulated and termed "world-formula"... ...All the records are blurred with age. But were I able to quantify them to some extent, they could be of use in my "world-formula" calculations...

...No matter how many times I derive it, the result remains the same, though this result is not expected... Unlike the world depicted in these ancient texts, there will be no more new civilizations born... Unless we consider introducing "variables" from outside the system... If it was that sort of power, there might be a chance...

Here I found the magical techniques left behind by the Golden Troupe (they seem to be referred to by various names, I'll go with this one for now). Based on my interpretation, it appears to be known as the "Seal of Chymical Marriage" and consists of two parts. However, it has been weathered too much to decipher any more information... Interestingly, I have encountered similar symbols in documents from the Narzissenkreuz Institute archives... They look complicated, yet the underlying principles are quite clear. If the records prove accurate, there are some key locations within the realm remaining... Related records may be found elsewhere as well... I should record my findings here for now, as they may prove useful in the future...

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (I).

...The pollution of the land and water wrought by the giant beast Elynas seems to have been mostly purified and diluted. However, when it comes to Elynas itself, even the adults seem to be at a total loss. They simply cordoned off the surrounding area. Nevertheless, it was quite easy to sneak in. It felt rather strange slipping into the creature's mouth, and it reminded me of events from some of the stories I once read...

...Though I have no substantive evidence, I still sensed some sort of "will" from it. Jakob did, too... There were no signs of decay in the flesh. Instead, its body was hardening, as if forming a protective membrane. Given its current immobilized state, it looked like a self-defense mechanism to safeguard its internal organs... ...But it does make sense, with such a wellspring of vitality... If my deduction is correct, it may also be used to enhance Jakob's strength by following the same principle... However, at this stage, there's no need to subject Jakob to such risks. I should get safe experimental data first through the Institute of Natural Philosophy, and then set specific research objectives. Although, as Jakob mentioned, this may waste a lot of precious time... ...After all, the flesh of Elynas remains toxic, and the risk if Jakob...

...Jakob has returned. He's quite brave, but also an idiot. He didn't give any thought to the possible consequences. We have no one else to rely on now. If he... ...The data we've collected is still incomplete. Jakob had minor adverse reactions, primarily vomiting. But he recovered quickly and hasn't shown other symptoms in the short term. His mental status and physical status remain stable... It's only possible because Jakob completely trusts me... Our lives are limited. Still, even if it's just for the future, we must find a way to get allies, get stronger, and prevent disaster...

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (II).

...The tests on Jakob's strength continue. As before, the flesh and blood of the great beast Elynas is being used as nutrition. Jakob seems to have gotten used to it, so there's nothing to worry about anymore. Thus the "adverse reactions" observed before may just have been caused by Jakob's feelings of disgust. It's a relief to know that his physical condition hasn't been harmed... ...Jakob still eats, but only out of habit and no longer as a necessity for survival. But I suppose it's a good thing, because eating together is nice. It suddenly occurred to me that jam was somewhat similar to the flesh and blood of Elynas, so I made a joke about it. Jakob seemed quite uncomfortable... ...The results have improved significantly in comparison to previous tests. Perhaps more can be done... Then the next step would be to attempt the opening of a "passage"...

...The "passage" was opened successfully, though it only lasted a short while. During this time, many black monsters that were shaped like dogs emerged. They were very aggressive and terrifying, but thank goodness Jakob was here. Though he was so scared he was crying, he still managed to wipe them out while bawling... ...These monsters are identical to those we discovered during our desert expedition. However, those were salt gray, stiff, and immobile at the time, so it was relatively safe... ...I'm certain their properties are nearly identical to those of Elynas...

...The Khaenri'ahn records mention "passages" appearing in large numbers, and numerous dangerous monsters that looked like dogs emerging from them. It's very likely that they are the same type... ...It can be safely postulated that the location these "passages" link to is full of these monsters, and I shall tentatively call them "Beastly Rifts"... thus, these hounds may be called "Rifthounds"...

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (III).

...Although they say a single piece of evidence is never sufficient, the change in Jakob fills me with hope. If I can make more people accept this kind of change, then it wouldn't matter even if we came face to face with the apocalypse. Even if our world couldn't even grow mint, we could still survive, and as long as we can survive, we can revive our civilization. That will be the next topic...

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (IV).

...But Carter is unconscious. I took samples of his blood and skin and got a swift catspaw to take it to Sumeru to be looked at... other from observing the problem, the root of the problem cannot be found. It's pointless, absolutely pointless. Conventional medicine is pointless. I must figure something else out...

...Jakob... Jakob's proposal is very dangerous. I must give it more thought.

...

...I told Carter everything and had Jakob prove his strength and transformation. I even explained the risks, its historical baggage, and my other objective: To create a second sample that can corroborate the realization of human transcendence via ██, and derive the holistic character and method from it. Carter isn't very good at thinking scientifically, so I used many examples and methods of emphasis. But he seems to have made up his mind from the beginning.

...

...Still deteriorating. ...It seems Jakob's successful integration was an extreme case. Or perhaps he's not himself anymore? I can't be sure.

...

...I must continue observing. It can't be a waste. It can't be a waste. Or else it will all have been for nothing, utterly meaningless. I got more materials in an attempt to reverse it. All sorts of relics and biological tissue from after the calamity. I even got my hands on extremely dangerous residue. Nothing worked. But I can't give up. He's still "alive" right now. At the very least, in this sense, it can continue. It cannot be a waste.

...

...He's preserved for now and further tissue collapse has been prevented. Jakob doesn't tear up at the sight of him anymore... but occasionally Carter's voice is occasionally heard from... and that's the worst. I've tried cutting out the organs where his vocal cords probably are, but they grow back in one to three days...

...

...During my discussion with Jakob, I thought of another direction that's worth trying. It may be the solution to everything...

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (V).

...In the expedition to Petrichor and the ruins from before... we discovered... origin. It seems that compared to humans, we... If... all return to... transcend. Although anti-intellectual and counter-intuitive,... the ancients succeeded before...

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (VI).

...It's really nice to see her again. But there's nothing here except water, which is really quite uncomfortable. Actually, I felt the same way when I traveled to Sumeru with Jakob and Karl. Empty buildings feel lonely, yet enduring at the same time... In the apocalypse, stone structures outlive humans a million times over. It's the same here. So, to a certain extent, it's just a bit of apocalyptic scenery... The director has been observing these scenes for so long, so I'm sure she feels much of the same sorrow.

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (VII).

...Rather than calling it a sword, it should be called a key... It does not belong to anyone, and it just travels from one hand to the next... The wills of countless people be concentrated... Necessary materials and rituals...

...

...It's actually quite interesting, it basically just boils down to a kind of extremely effective witchcraft that takes advantage of the situation. But the reason it is effective is due to the nature of the origin, the primordial... based on the records, the constituent elements should be a "Circle of Four Orthants" and a "Tree of Emanation"... flows from the roots toward the center of the circle, and the circle encircles the abstract of... It's akin to pie crust and the filling of the pie, a metaphor sure to excite Jakob. Hmm, we'll need some suitably sophisticated terminology for the laymen...

...Found the ancient seal's general location. If the records are accurate, we should be able to confirm the specific site... We should also be able to determine the locations of the four constituent elements, for as long as we find one, we can calculate all other nodes... We arranged for members of the society to visit several candidate locations, we should be able to find traces of water and channels of higher quality and density... ...This is just hilarious now. The secrets that ancient civilizations, so carefully guarded, what a joke... Turns out we've already been through the same countless times in our youth...

...The slate replica we discovered supported the calculations. As the prelude to the apocalypse, the sea will...

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (VIII).

...Finally convinced her to follow us to the gestalt still under construction... She seemed apprehensive, but everything will turn out fine. We no longer have to fear the future. I have a lot of power at my disposal now: I have Jakob, the members of the society, and I generally know what to do... agreed at last. Now we can obtain the most precious... After all, other than the inferior mutants, you can no longer see the original in Fontaine... ...I am very satisfied with Jakob's design. The sense of mystery and ceremony is very intense. He may have a real knack for this...

...

...The rebuilding of the Four Orthants is near completion, and we have positioned our people based on the locations on the map... Reversing it and adding the power of the sword should be sufficient to control... ...All of us Fontainians will be able to transcend in this way, shedding the limitations of physical form and separation, and prevent the apocalypse... ...Got the sword, despite the cost... The director's condition is deteriorating. Hope she can hold on...

...

...Farewell, I shall rediscover myself through water, and be reborn through water. This is a tremendous feat that no one else in natural philosophy has ever attempted. If it fails, I won't have to worry about the future anymore.

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (IX).

Everything has become consummately clear. All meaningless obstacles have vanishes. This trial was a great success. I know now what I must do. This process appears to have cost me some time and experience. But that won't matter. I shall have all the time in the universe, after all. I am become Narzissenkreuz. ... The memories do not seem to match the records. Perhaps... (Most of the content has dissolved completely before it could be comprehended).

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (X).

...Shall be the passage between the primordial and the present... ...Deconstruct and reverse its utility, and internalize... ...Use to fully master... ...Matrimony of chemistry, bonding of the elements... ...Circular ruins, forest in the mirror... ...Send Lyris and Jakob to...

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (XI).

...Three agents have been absorbed to date. Useful skills gained... ...Discovered from their memories that, regarding the Ordo's existence, the Court of Fontaine has officially...

...

...Very interesting mechanism. With the right organ, consciousness can be transplanted... ...Has the knowledge to operate the mechanism. Understand the general idea after absorption that other than an experimental model, all operated on a simple logic tree... ...An interesting attempt, but the path he chose was regrettable. Rene would definitely think so... ...Jakob got emotional because he does not wish to oppose the Guillotin siblings...

...Declined, of course. Alain Guillotin said before leaving that "it seems that there's no going back." Alas, he is only a genius when it comes to machines. In all other things, he is but ordinary. He does not understand the future — he does not even realize that we hit the point of no return long ago. I, however, will create the future, and there will be a place for him and Mary-Ann Guillotin in it.

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (XII).

...Go to Elynas and carry out the above order together. Buy time. Let us meet again in the new universe and the pure sea of tranquility.

                                                                                     —Enigmatic Page (XIII).

[lightcreators]

He was really glad to see her again. Would always be glad to see her again, actually. Always. No matter the circumstances, no matter the timing for both of them, no matter how long it could have been for each other. At once, an expression fullfilled of happiness pictured, though, she would notice it was a bit distanced, modered, controlled from before … ❝ It had been a long time indeed. ❞ He agreed, as he would have to found an method to expressing some things changed. He had been a bit transformed by circumstances. Maybe something as much too long to explain within inside one conversation when they just reintroducing themselves each other. For sure, she would notice the difference. She wasn't to be blamed about that. Neither how his other iteration could pulling the blame over an path he had preparing him to take a long time ago when he had been considered enough malleable for be attentive towards foreshadowing. ❝ I wish myself I had better news myself. ❞ He admitted as he was likewise sorry.

Here came the moment when as much he remained distrustful while honored of his alternative self, he had been pulled inside an position when knowing the narrative was one of his few privileges. Featherine receiving an indirect reassurance concerning the rest of his timestream inclined an slight evolution of their relationship within the background … and regardless, if his alternative self desired the end of one hydra, of course, knoweldge would leave his lips concerning other problems. ❝ I was informed that there would be this problem. ❞ He confessed more frontally that time around, compared to all the time he had forced to force vagueness over circumstances. Assurebly, the universe going into complete extinction was something neither the MIB or Featherine wanted to hide. Nevertheless, Featherine's position remained unchanged. He would have to act in the manner she wouldn't have to interfere --- as she would have to simply erase the Flux. Deleting everything that could coming from the script if she decided to do it. The MIB had anticipated it --- as they were anticipating Thanos … and desired he found an manner to influence concerned heroic superheroes for save the day regardless his current position. ❝ Honestly, I thought it could have been an consequence coming from Thanos --- but I heard it's was another problem entirely. ❞ He had thought of a sort of temporal tarpaulin to perhaps stop the black hole --- when in search of these stones which could cause destruction of the galaxy, he hadn't been invited to travel across the galaxy to the moment to do the job, to simply act on Earth since it was possible --- but despite the good metaphorical idea, the technical means still remained somewhat complicated. ❝ Discussing with the Asgardians in order to have technological assistance is not something easy to obtain, even if you anticipate in advance. ❞ By the sound of his voice, he absolutely didn't want to see destruction of his universe.

@lightcreators liked here for a starter with Coulson!

"Good to see you again!" The Doctor says with a smile.

"I wish I had better news." The Flux is destroying the universe. And she's already done all she can to get UNIT's help. Budget cuts. So perhaps SHIELD can offer her assistance. Yaz and Dan are working on it too. But she could use all the help she can get. "Have you heard of the Flux?" She asks, deciding to get right into it. He deals with aliens. He might know.

[sinhasaheart]

Hal and sinestro talking about there parents

Green light flares, lingering in the air Hal strides through as he paces back and forth. Still, even lost in thought as he is, he spares the time to pause and smile briefly at Sinestro.

"You are identical to your father," Sinestro finds himself commenting, voice low. "Regardless of the physical similarities. It is the set of your shoulders."

Although startled, Hal is nevertheless pleased and he stops to run his fingers through his hair. Then he hesitates, "How do you...?"

"Your speedster friend must have mentioned our little adventure into your past," Sinestro drawls, waving a dismissive hand. It's unimportant and he watches Hal for a moment, studying him intently. "Did your mother resent the similarity?"

The answering glance contains a tight smile. "I think she hated me," Hal says. He turns and rests his back against the wall, arms crossed. "What's it to you? Your parents proud of having a power mad tyrant who destroyed their planet?"

Pain sears through Sinestro with shocking force at the cruel words cutting into him. His breath catches and he utters a soft laugh. "You are more alike to your mother than you realise."

Sensing Sinestro's inner but hidden reaction, Hal ducks his head. What he's said is true, at least somewhat, but he doesn't want to take pleasure in causing harm.

"My life is my own," Sinestro continues with a contemptuous toss of his head. "I need no approval from those who would not support me. Perhaps you ought to consider the same." As he looks at Hal, his upper lip curls in distaste.

It brings Hal up short. "I'm not like you," he tells Sinestro abruptly. His eyes narrow, suspicious of Sinestro's intentions.

"That is apparent." For the moment, Sinestro looks down his nose at Hal, but then he glances away. A small furrow creases his brow with genuine confusion. "Why must you insist on allowing those who hurt you to have access to your life?"

The distance between them seems to just fade and Hal rests his hand on Sinestro's chest. "If I tossed out everyone who hurt me, you'd be long gone." His fingers push up and wrap around the back of Sinestro's neck. "And then where would I be, hmm?"

Brown eyelashes tinged in green light frame white playful eyes. Hal is brighter and warmer than a thousand stars and Sinestro is inadequate.

"Free," Sinestro responds though he hates to acknowledge the truth. "Happier. Do not pretend -"

The strike is fast, instant even, as Hal presses the fingers of his other hand against Sinestro's lips. "You're wrong," he says, without hesitation. "I know which I'd rather have."

It's the genuineness, the honesty with which Hal speaks, that hits Sinestro more than anything else, that crushes him until he cannot bear to look at the human. "You ought not to be presented with that decision." His brow furrows and he bites back his own frustration. "I regret that I complicate matters for you."

Watching Sinestro, Hal steps back with a thoughtful hum and leans his weight against the nearby wall. "Would I even like it if we were uncomplicated? I'm not blameless." It hurts to know it.

There's something raw in Hal's voice, vulnerable, and Sinestro glances at him. "You are... entirely too blameless."

Hal coughs on a laugh. "That's a first," he mutters. If he did better, was less like himself, so many things won't have happened. Even now, Hal is being less than good enough and he hesitates, worrying his bottom lip as he thinks on what he's said to Sinestro.

Finally, Hal can't take it and he starts abruptly, "Sinestro, I -" but a hand is held up to stop him.

"Do not," Sinestro tells Hal calmly, unconcerned. "You will never have indifference from me."

It's both parts comforting and decimating. The words wrap around Hal like soft warm fabric, embracing his mind protectively. No matter what he says or does, he's written into Sinestro's life, an undeniable part. He's sure it's a curse on Sinestro.

[firesofdainix]

pspsps hello beloved marijuana I thought of something about Hideaki and wanted to share

since his appearance changes according to his mood, do you think as the apathy and indifference starts building up while he was in the cursed realm, his hair and eye color start getting duller and duller (assuming they have color in the cursed realm lmao)

I wanna talk about this in a complicated and long answer, Because I'm in the mood to talk more about Hideaki. Here's a few more facts about his powers and some more insight in his personality under the cut:

Hideaki's entire color palette, before he died, was a warm, soft spring, correlating to his initial personality of being a warm, bright child who clutches on optimism and happiness. That's why he always taps into the sub-element of spring when he uses his powers, because it reflects his attitude and way of life. He was born and raised by optimistic and well off parents who only wanted to see their children grow up happy with careers and a life ahead of them. Thus, why they let Hideaki go with FSM, no matter how sad they are about the ordeal.

Spring mostly taps into the power of Lightning, simply because spring is also the rainy season and just because I want to, lol. It can command the area in Hideaki's proximity to change or evolve in their seasonal patterns, but changing the actuality of the season is taxing for someone as young as Hideaki so he keeps it safe. He can make a flower bloom in the dead of winter, or can make a spring shower out of nowhere in the summer season. Nevertheless, he is in his most powerful during spring season, since he doesn't NEED to control the season nor temperature until he's comfortable enough to start fighting.

The Element of Seasons can also control the quality or traits attributed towards each season: Hideaki is the strongest in spring because his personality makes it compatible for him to control the season. That's why his eye color and hair, most of the time, resembles spring the most, because he's happy and joyful and all things associated with that season. He's vibrant and exudes optimism and that's what makes him so strong in a season where people get pollen allergies (idk I live in a tropical country).

Anyways, talking about moods, Hideaki could also control summer with little to no struggle as well; as a season commonly after spring, summer, in Hideaki's case, is based off raw emotions, outburst, passion and his temper flaming. While spring is his natural personality, happiness incarnate, summer is the emotions that he has to let out every once in a while. Initially, when he was a rookie elemental master not knowing what was happening to him, his confusion, anger, and frustration over not understanding why this phenomenon is tied to him accidentally almost burnt a part of the forest down because the season of summer had been tied to his emotion. It's what led FSM to find him in the first place and comfort him over why this is happening.

So, while his emotional outbursts can be tied to summer still, he has better control over how much he exudes over his element. So when his hair and eyes are in its summer colors (more vibrant and fiery), and the temperature around them is somewhat abnormally warm (especially during winter, autumn, and spring seasons), it means that Hideaki is probably experiencing strong emotions of either passion or anger. Maybe you should start talking to him before he burns down another forest again. Because of his affinity towards summer, he can tap in to the core element of Fire (because summer = hot lmao) helping either increase the temperature or decrease it. In some extreme cases, he can create a fire by making the temperature rise.

Now we go onto the elements Hideaki didn't have primary or stable control over, before he died: autumn and winter. If spring is the embodiment of his personality and how he views things in his life, while summer is his raw feelings and passion, autumn and winter are the opposites of what he and his entire being stood for... For a while, of course.

Autumn is the season represented with abundance, plentiful harvest, but simultaneously represented with death, decay, and decline. You can already see where Hideaki is struggling with this; Hideaki can only replicate or manipulate the one side of autumn that is all about the harvest and abundance of harvest, but not the other side of it. He struggles to understand that sometimes life is meant to be lost. He can tap into the element of earth, yes, but because he can't control the side of autumn very well his access to the element of earth is quite limited and closed off to him. When using autumn's powers, his appearance only appears as a slightly less desaturated version of summer because of his inability to control all of autumn. If he had any true power over the season, his colors would resemble the one in my Hideaki picture.

Some abilities he CAN do while using his autumnal powers: speeding up the process of crops being harvested, ability to detect or sense a change in direction. Autumn is the season of dormancy, which is why Hideaki struggles; he is known to be active and enthusiastic over everything, so finding himself trying to be... Lethargic or inactive is like a mortal sin for Hideaki.

Next up is winter, a season that transmutes coldness and representation of death. Hideaki also doesn't have the personality of winter (nor autumn), and is the complete opposite of his personality. It's literally the representation of inactivity, detachment, stillness, stagnance that Hideaki finds repulsive throughout his life. It's beautiful, yes, but he would rather just be able to move or feel something other than being, well, the same thing as a winter wonderland. Because of this, he STRUGGLES attempting to replicate winter or even manipulate traits that are usually associated through winter, to the point he avoids using it unless the other Elemental Masters force him to for whatever reason. He couldn't properly tap into the Element of Ice; he can make temperature frigid, but beyond that, it's a really big struggle.

(Fun fact! He actually managed to defeat the Oni of Anger with a trivial temperature decrease, to distract him, before Kokoro goes in for the kill. That's how you deal with toxic father in laws everyone!)

Anyways, about Hideaki's colors depending and changing on his mood or what season he's channeling, it's time to go into his abilities post-mortem. He was the first and last Elemental Master of Seasons (he planned for his baby to become the next inheritor, but you know what happened), so most data about his abilities is lost through history. Anyways, because he died in a gruesome, tragic way and is then subjected to the worst condition of afterlife possible, his spring and summer persona and traits start to fade.

Hideaki starts to understand what the season of autumn truly meant during his years in the Cursed Realm, filled with misery and the case of not having to do anything. Not wanting to do anything anymore, knowing that every escape, every attempt is quite futile, he started to lose hope and what made him Hideaki in the first place. While there is no concept of seasons in the Cursed Realm, he can now control all sides of autumn, tapping into the element of earth properly without any struggle. His emotions slowly but surely begin to grow stagnant, less passionate, less feeling over the years. He is only left with the growing sense of bitterness and that building apathy. Simply put, because of the prompt betrayal and murders carried about his legacy.

When autumn transitions into winter, it's not a very special change, because they're all ghosts and the only way to see whether or not they have colors is if the green pigmentation is a little lighter or darker. But Hideaki KNOWS he's been stuck in this wintry cover for over a thousand years. And yes, because spring colors are all about the softness of colors and being full, winter is the opposite of that, the colors getting duller and duller as the years went by. It's a consequence to his power, as the successor of the Great Devourer's seasonal abilities. Seasons are the driving force of his power, yes, but it also gives and takes from his own emotions, which is the biggest link of them all.

Winter is the season of death, stillness, void, and frigid. Hideaki in the next life is dead, a specter, an old incarnation of his old self. He thinks that, in the end of all things, the person he used to be is gone. It died when he died. This new person that ended up in the Cursed Realm, turned into villain, the thing he hates the most. Yet, after so many years, so much suffering, so much overwhelming emotions that couldn't be solved... he stopped. He developed the need to stop feeling. The need to not cast his expression to the stage, to be the husband the Preeminent wanted him to be. The person that is supposed to not care about anything at all. Yet as the apathy built up, so is his emotions resistance. Somewhere inside him, the last trace of spring remains, no matter how much he want to believe that the person he once was was gone.

<small>... he just doesn't want to believe that some part of him still cares about the people around him.</small>

Here's a discord convo about Hideaki's struggle with empathy and emotions, along with a character parallel I actually created with another oc of mine, Alvern, who's the complete opposite of Hideaki.

Here is also doodles of his summer and winter variant when it comes to the comparison of his most vibrant colors to his lowest, duller and blander ones:

[animeyanderelover]

Hey💖Can you do Tobirama,Hashirama,Madara,Itachi,Sasuke and Indra with a s/o whose giving them the silent treatment?

Whatever you wish for.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, obsessiveness, possessiveness, violence, harsh behavior, threatening, blackmailing, bribing

Silent treatment

Indra Otsutsuki

💜That will not work with Indra since he expects obedience and is controlling, terrifying much in that matter. I do see him not working very well with a very talkative or clingy darling to start with, he needs a lot of his own space and appreciates silence. So he wouldn’t be someone who would want to talk often with his s/o to start with. He is after all someone who does ignore them from time to time too, most likely when he’s stressed or with his thoughts somewhere else. But if his darling ignores him, that’s something entirely else. It’s disrespectful for him and will piss him greatly off. Not only that, but whilst not admitting it, Indra does feel the tiniest bit insecure about himself. He was after all rejected by his father for his brother who was a nobody, but still beat him and became the leader of the village. So ignoring him and not appreciating will give him some nasty memories coupled with a stinging reminder of his hurt ego and pride.

💜You won’t be able to do this for too long, the moment Indra gets what you’re doing, it’s already game over to say the least. You only get this one warning from him, you know? And it is maybe better to use this one ‘friendly’ warning before he decides to go with other ways which are far more painful and cruel and not worth the pain at all. If this is still whilst he’s part of the village, he wouldn’t be that incredibly violent, but he would end up monopolizing your time a lot and somewhat threaten you to talk finally to him. Who knows, his brother might try helping even though Indra didn’t want his help.

Madara Uchiha

🌑Whilst it is with Indra already a piece of horror, with Madara this is even more intense. He is just a lot more complicated and twisted than Indra is, not to mention a whole lot more controlling due to having lost his brother and having gone through the trauma of his whole clan who he respected betraying him for the Leaf Village. It led him to a literal war-starting paranoia and made him just so much more prone for any sort of disobedience. Different from Indra, Madara has a lot more confidence in himself so whilst his darling ignoring him won’t poke any sensitive spot in his heart, it will just make him mad for the reason that they won’t listen to him and he gives only few warnings.

🌑It’s in general just so difficult to please him since he expects a lot and also never really tells his darling what they can do to help them, it’s just a blind game for them. And he has no qualms about hurting and punishing his s/o whenever they slip up which will happen very fast in here. This small act of rebellion will be short-lived, just wait and see. If we’re talking about a Madara in the village, he would be a bit less intense about this, but still ready to go to extreme lengths, including involving the darling’s family so they start paying attention to him once again.

Hashirama Senju

🌳Good luck with trying to successfully ignore him because Hashirama is a lot to endure. He's extremely clingy and also somewhat very needy for his darling's attention so please just give it to him. Because that guy is really prone and whenever his darling is in a bad mood, he is as well. To go as far as giving him the silent treatment he must have done something pretty terrible because normally Hashi is really charming and funny, besides his clingyness. And if he did something wrong, be that bribing you or something similar to hat, he knows why you act the way you do. And believe me, he feels terrible about it, in a way even thinks that he deserves it. Nevertheless, it will lead him to constantly being down and upset, people noticing that he seems more depressed these days and the longer this continues, the more it might actually affect his work.

🌳Hashirama is different from the previous guys. He doesn't hurt nor threatens his darling. As I mentioned, he might be delusional, but he knows that whatever he did to lead you to going as far as coldly ignoring was wrong. He won't really give up and leave you alone though, he just talks to you in hopes of getting you to respond, also trying to do things to please you. But after a while he will realize that you won't do as much as look at him, letting him leave feeling like a kicked puppy. Most likely way how you started to talk to him again was either through Mito or Tobirama. Both know Hashi very well and are also persons who know about his feelings. So one of them might have visited you to talk to you, Hashirama maybe even requested their help. Mito is the more enjoyable option here because I feel like Tobirama would be somewhat mad at you for a.) upsetting his brother and b.) causing him to not work as good and focused as he used to be anymore.

Tobirama Senju

🌊He expects behavior, as harsh as this may sound. But Tobi isn't the softest Yandere to start with either, he's quite dangerous to be clear in here. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if he wouldn't be the type to sometimes ignore you as well, most likely when he is really busy with stuff or does it on purpose so you have to be the one to come back to him and ask for help because your life is once again in some troubles. He does feel bad about it somehwhere deep down, but if his darling would on the other hand just behave, he wouldn't have to do all of this. It doesn't even make him really mad, it just leads him to being annoyed since he thought you would know better than to behave like a bratty child. I'm pretty sure he expected some sort of rebellion anyways because as I said, he is aware of his wrong actions.

🌊I feel like he wouldn't use his position to threaten you, at least at first. Don't get it wrong, he is very willing to use it whenever he feels the need too. But he would like to not do this for something so ridiculous like this. There is surely another way to solve this. Tobirama feels like he shouldn't use his power simply because you decided to rebel a bit. I think he would just return the favor. He will ignore you as well, at least in private because in public he wouldn't do it. It doesn't sound as bad at first, but the problem is that his darling has to rely on him for a lot more things than they might expect, starting with the permission to go outside since the Anbu are watching them all the time. And so he will humiliate you once again because you can't keep this up forever, ending with you having to beg for forgiveness once again and him just acting smug about it.

Itachi Uchiha

🍡He is the best person in here to deal with this. Itachi is respectful, very much as well and feels also really guilty about what he did. He's a lucid Yandere and is all to aware of what unspeakable things he has done, not only for his s/o, but in general. And he carries this all too heavy burden with him. Itachi would never force you into anything as long as you don't do the first step, the only time when he did force you into anything was when he kidnapped you for which he is quite apologetic. He really doesn't expect much from his darling and tries to be as nice and considerate as he can be with them, it's honestly the only thing he can do after taking everything they knew away from them.

🍡He expected it anyways. He can't expect his darling to not be mad at him since the whole situation is really unbelievable. Who wouldn't flip out when being kidnapped from a stranger who happens to be the famous wanted criminal Itachi Uchiha? He gives you a lot of free space, not wanting to make you feel cornered or pressured in any way. It is hurtful for him to just being treated like air, but he couldn't have expected anything more from you either. He would never show how much this might sadden him and just give you time. There are times where he will still engage in one-sided conversations with you, not even trying to get you to answer. He just wants someone to listen since he has a lot on his mind.

Sasuke Uchiha

💙Except Itachi and Hashirama all the wrong guys in here were chosen, sorry to say this. Sasuke has to start with terrible mood swings and lashes quite often out on his darling for the smallest things, especially if he is already tensed up or in a bad mood. And he's also the type to give his darling the silent treatment as well and won't even apologize for it or even do as much as really feel bad for it either. He is just so incredibly prideful to admit all too often that he loves his darling since he always and still somewhat believes that love and friendship is ajust a weakness to have, meaning his darling makes him weak. His emotions confuse him and he can't progress to why he likes his darling that much in the first place, making him irritated with the whole situation and he blames it on the darling.

💙Sasuke has a controlling mania as well, maybe not that extreme like Madara or Indra, but still worse like in many other Yanderes. Next to that whilst he never really cares what his darling might think and feel when he ignores them, he definitely knows that he hates it when his s/o ignores him. It makes him agitated and from there on you have to be careful or else it will end in just another painful lecture. If we're talking about a mature Sasuke I feel like he would treat you more like a parent a bratty child, definitely not about cruelly making fun of you about being like this. As an adult Sasuke might have a bit more patience, but he still dislikes being ignored and the moment he suddenly becomes serious is the moment where I would advice to stop ignoring him, appreciate a more patient and less violent Sasuke as long as he is this way.

[starshipsofstarlord]

Jim and Jody - Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary; it was one of the biggest decisions of your life, but will you change your mind before your future is sealed?

Warnings; angst, mentions of abortion (everyone is permitted to do what they want with their body, in this imagine the reader wants to keep the baby, but pro choice, as everyone deserves control over their bodies and all 🤍), brief mention of sex and threats

Masterlist Link

To see him so relaxed, so completely and utterly himself was a paradise all on its own. There was a heaviness aboard your shoulders, but as you watched him goof tirelessly about, you had no other concerns, not even as you subconsciously raised your hand over your stomach. You shook your head at the sentiment, the two of you had already made the decision to abort this child, it was unknown how the poor fellow would turn out to be; with the combination of your powers and his super everything, it was sure to be quite the complication, and not one that you supposed was to be an easy course.

A smile pried at your face, simply from viewing him with the pack of children, the wind from the docks swept your hair into your face, and in turn, you swept the locks out and away from your vision, so that you had further access to watch the man that you loved in his absolute element. Through the years, past and recent, he had lost so much, and this child was just to be another mantle on the wall of memorial in his mind, it was sad really. If the two of you were normal, with average and lives that had perceptions with no regards of being heroic, there’d be no query about it, you’d keep the baby.

That life though, to your grave misfortune, did not exist, it was merely a fantasy living painfully inside of your mind, haunting you whenever you closed your eyes, with the flashing images of a resolution and end to the errors in your lifestyle. There’d be a big house, yet nothing to prissy, just enough room for the pair of you and few children of your own, a grand garden with a swing set and sand pit, where the infants could grow up and play in once they were older. Then there’d also be a shed for Bucky to work on small projects, such as attaining some love and care to his motor bike, as well as storing the supplies that he’d need to do so.

All that is a universe away, muffled from possibility by the stars expediting through the gorgeous veil of the galaxy, corrupting the possibilities of ever gaining access to such... peace. That was the one thing that the pair of you wanted, however catching a break was rather rare within your predicament. A stifled laugh reeled from the conjunction of your lips as you simply and endearingly surveyed how the boys, specifically Sam’s nephews hung from the vibranium branch of his arm. It was all your attention was focused on, until an extra person took a seat on the picnic table beside you, his sweet yet musky scent detailing whom it was. “If your not going to eat that, I’m sure Barnes Junior might want an opinion on that.”

The underlining of the words caused an abstract grimace to forlorn your features, as you stared not at the speaker of whom you were close with, but instead the slather of cake that was planted on a paper plate before you, the icing beginning to become slightly sick from the beating of the viable son. “You’re glowing, you know? Motherhood is a good look on you y/n/n, I wouldn’t be so soon to let that go.” Your fingers pried at the dismantled crumbs off your section of desert as you looked to your new captain, a resonating conformation fo bridled suffering and hopelessness clouding your view of his attempt at making you atone before you made a sin that you’d forever regret.

He, like many others, knew that the family life was what you wanted; you wanted to be your child’s hero, tending to their each necessary (and unnecessary) need, them being your main focus and project and life. Instead, you had been handed your options on a short stick, and thus, your decision, albeit somewhat of a sensible one, didn’t make it hurt any less. “Sam.” You spoke his name, observing from the corner of your eye how Bucky paraded around the dock with Jim and Jody. It’d be nice to give him a slice of this kinda life, he was thriving as an adult around children, you could only imagine him in the case of this one being birthed into the world. “It’s not that easy.”

“No one said it was going to be easy.” Sam responded quickly, affirming your fears to your nerve wrecked face. “I get it, I do. People will be after this kid, and that is no way to live, but you two aren’t alone in any of this, nor will you be in that. You have me, along with many other old friends of ours, hell even the Wakandan’s. Do you really want to sacrifice this one life so you can continue living this one? You and Bucky have both lost so much, you don’t have to force yourself to willingly give away something else. The decision can be changed the last minute, it’s a lot to take in, I get that, but I see the way Buck is with my nephews, and how you watch them when you think nobody’s looking over at you. With your state pardon, you two can retire, and go far away, and abandon everything for this one little guy or gal, because I know that if you do, no matter what, they’ll be worth it.”

Bucky wailed a warrior’s shout as Jim and Jody playfully struck him down, his unsheathed metal hand grasping at the cloth that was tightly aboard his addictive chest. He rolled on the ground as the children ran to retrieve their toy lightsabers, leaving him to be expendable against their weapons. There was a giddy and fitting smile smouldering his usual stoic expression. It was no wander why he found calm in visiting Sam and his sister’s small, and accepting family. The kids brought out another side of him, which he had been tortured to refrain from showing, but you had seen, and were contemplating many things within your mind. You were lapping up the image, as though you were dehydrated and the sight of him appeased by the company of young ones was a source of water.

Sam was right, he always was and had been. “The decision was on both of our parts, you don’t think Buck’ll change his mind, or do you?” You were invested in getting a responsive answer, yet the man spluttered a laugh at your confused expense. He heaved for a moment, bracing his hands on his knees as he caught his breath. There was nothing stopping him from gaining it back, unlike Bucky whom had grabbed a saber of his own and lightly began to paddle against the one that was directed against him, other than another round of hysterics that abandoned him. A reasonable smile resonated a comfortable position upon the former falcon’s face, as he tentatively patted your knee, watching as you broke off a small rupture of cake and popped it in your mouth, feeding not only yourself but the inmate within your womb.

“There isn’t really much for me to say, it’s easy, look at him. He will be fine with whatever decision that the pair of you succumb to, after all, it’s your body, but it will pain him like nothing else ever has if you go through with the abortion, and if not, then trust me, we’ve both seen how hard he fights; think of that but ten times the mass in consideration of this baby, because I am certain that he’d do anything for them. He lost his entire family when he awoke from his mode of hydra assassin, this could be him getting it back. Different members, but a family all the same.” He stole a little of your cake, making you lightly elbow him as a smirk rendered a beauty upon his face.

“What’s that going to make you, the patriotic uncle who just can’t keep himself from flashing his shield?” Now it was his turn to retaliate, he lightly scuffed your ankle with a feather light tap of the toe of his shoe, causing you to promiscuously roll your eyes. “I’m joking, that was Steve’s aesthetic, this new version of cap is your baby, I have great faith in you to make this world a better and safer place. The funny thing is, when you finally accepted that shield was yours, that’s when my mind shifted to the possibility of keeping this kid. It was and has always been a sign of hope and protection to Bucky, maybe it could be the same for our little one. It was just a thought, I’m not meaning to put pressure on your or anything bu-“

“I get it, and I’m honoured. And if that is how it seems, then I want you to know that I’ll be there to protect them too. The main bump in the road for now is for you to talk to that grumpy ass boyfriend of yours and figure this sperm plus egg equation out, send Jim and Jody over here, I got somethin’ to show those two anyway.” With a nod and a grateful pat upon your friend’s head, you slowly plodded over to where Bucky was being cornered against the side of the truck by the boys. His blue orbs danced around their small and imaginative beings, until they landed on you, it was as though his pupils were calling out for help, begging for you to spare some mercy upon him.

“Jim, Jody, your uncle Sammy has something for you two to see.” They groaned lightly, having been pulled away from the narrative of their play time, but nevertheless their faces were clean slates as they expressed hyper smiles, and bolted their route towards their mother’s sibling, carrying their lightsaber replicas along with them. “Two kids beat an infamous, deadly badass with a metal arm. I think you might be getting too old for these kinda battles Buck, you were losing, and quite terribly if I say so myself.” Crossing your arms, as he came to an upright stand, hoisting himself off the ground, so that he could be more level with you.

“Yeah, yeah, rub it in. Thought you were supposed to be supportive of me and all that, as you said to Zemo, you’d quite happily cut his dick off if he compared me to the shadow that I used to be.” His brow raised, as he reminisced on the thought of you threatening Zemo; it was hot, and certainly had gotten him going, which had shortly left you in this predicament, trying to save the world and execute the one last thing that exhumed hope to either one of you. The baby. It was almost a certain and solid fact that the little one inside of you had been procreated on the Baron’s private jet, more specifically, the small and clean bathroom that had became dirty with your primal sins.

“And I still regret not doing that, he’d have had much less leverage in any sense of the word of phallic if he had it sectioned off.” Silence emitted between the two of you, although a humoured smirk tantalised upon Bucky’s graceful face. For a change, he was not prompting the expression of a grumpy cat that was refused its nip, no, instead he could be compared to a future - actually, he already was a father to the bean held in the shield of your body, having been an ample ingredient in bringing the small person into being. “So, you having fun with Sarah’s kids, sure looks like you were quite in your element before I cut in.”

“I’m always in my element when you’re around doll.” He smiled, wrapping his uncoordinated hands around the oval of your waist, and tugging you sentimentally closer, your hips bumped with his, as your eyes ogled infatuatedly up at him. “They’re great kids, makes me realise exactly what we’re gonna be missing out on.” Bucky gulped, sparks of emotion taunted the behind of his eyes, like saucers of resentful fire. “You’d be the perfect mother, you know that right? After all you’ve done for me, you’ve nurtured me close to the man that I once was, the only difference is that I want to settle, but I don’t know how to go about dropping everything. This kid is killing me, he’s making me question everything.”

“That’s what kids are supposed to do, unborn, or very much avidly attacking grown men with false lightsabers.” Bucky deeply into your frustrated and corresponding eyes, your hands reaching up to play defiantly with the smooth dip in his chin that could be seen through the shading of his light stubble. “What if we did have a Jim and Jody of our own some day? We could keep him or her, they’d be our greatest concern, we don’t have to go down this painful and longing, rusted road. We could bring something good into this world, protect them against all forces that threaten to disrupt their life, I want this with you Bucky. We could move far far away, or go somewhere close to home.”

“Brooklyn.” He stated, causing a line to crease gently in the plain of his forehead. “I want to call them Brooklyn, if I am to fight the rest of my life for something, I want it to be my home. Last time I had to leave there, but it’s my amends to never leave this child of ours, if we’re going to do this, we need to put them in front of everything, and I mean everything.” He spoke, in reference to the other avengers and other aliases that you had stood by for so long. Bleakly you nodded, grasping his jaw down for an amorous kiss, humming against the palette of his lips, as your hands entwined behind his neck, pulling his face closer to your own, prompting his tongue to travel deeper within the realm of your mouth.

“Brooklyn is a nice name. How about Brooklyn Margaret Barnes? I think that has quite the ring to it.” You offered, and he hardly reacted, instead quickly appraising a pleasant smile onto the canvas of his work of art face, as he ducked his head down, conjoining the pair of you into a passionate and meaningful collide of your lips. Sam smiled as he watched the pair of you, pointing at you two from afar, as his nephews from afar. He was giving them a man to men talk, offering them advice that they would have valuable usage of in the future.

“Now that is love. You don’t give up for the one thing that connects you, and those two, well Bucky and y/n have been through a hell of a lot. They deserve this, and when you meet a woman when you’re older, and your mum is watching on towards the two of you, I want you to make her proud by treating your girl like a princess, willing to sacrifice everything simply to create the future that she wishes for you.” He emotionally wiped his eyes, rushing to stand before he grasped a lightsaber, leaving the other to spare for one of them. “Now Jim and Jody, which one of you will be my padawan?”

[illuminatedquill]

Nevertheless, Episode 9 (Preview)

Na Bi’s Choice

It’s almost time.

This will be my last post until after the latest episode drops, I think. I have no more to say; no more speculation to offer. I am actually still undecided as to whether I’m going to watch it tomorrow or binge it with the final episode next week. We’ll see.

So! I am here to offer a recap and a run down of where Na Bi has been and where, maybe, she’s going in this next episode based on everything I’ve seen so far. This is my opinion and if yours differs, I would love to hear about it.

Let’s do a recap:

Na Bi is, somewhat unsuccessfully, trying to move on from her relationship with Park Jae Un. In episode 8, we have two confessions (well, three, but Soljiwan don’t deserve to be a part of this angsty mess): one from Yang Do Hyeok, Na Bi’s childhood best friend, and one from Park Jae Un, local asshole.

Na Bi seems now aware of how messy her personal life is and has decided that now is not the best time to be dating. She turns down Do Hyeok, who only reassures and comforts her that it’s fine; he still likes her no matter what. Do Hyeok, best boy that he is, decides to respect her decision and give her the space she needs to choose what is best for herself.

Jae Un, asshole that he is, hasn’t gotten the memo that Na Bi desires an end to their drama and continues to invade her personal space and cross boundaries where he isn’t wanted. He does his own version of a confession and drops a hefty piece of info: that he was present at the night when Na Bi’s ex revealed his erotic sculpture of her and saw it all went down. He further reveals that he fell in love with her at first sight there.

Na Bi, thankfully, isn’t impressed.

(Not sure if the show is going to expand further on this info but we’ll see.)

At the end of episode 8, it’s evident that Jae Un is increasingly desperate to keep Na Bi by his side. He stalks her to the alleyway where they first talked all those episodes ago and drops that dumbass one liner about butterflies again.

And that’s where we left off.

Let’s break down Na Bi’s choices next. I’m not going to say how likely any of them are to happen; it’s all up in the air.

It’s Na Bi. We won’t know until she says it.

First off:

Park Jae Un

Let’s talk about it. Chemistry and attraction seem to reign supreme in Nevertheless and his case seems to be further bolstered by the fact that Na Bi seems unable to shut him out permanently (at this point, I’m not sure what exactly would be her breaking point with him). Yes, the two have evident feelings for each other but I’m feeling it more from him, rather than Na Bi.

The tables have certainly turned in this latter half of the drama: now Jae Un is the one desperately in love, whereas Na Bi is not willing to reciprocate. His gestures and advances of “sincerity” towards her come off as entirely self serving; I feel like he enjoys the feeling of being in love with her rather than actually being present in the relationship. It’s one thing to love someone; it’s another thing entirely to put in the work to make the relationship sustainable. And I have yet to see anything from either Jae Un or Na Bi that tells me that they could be a viable couple in the long run.

Also, Na Bi’s decision (if she sticks to it, which I hope she does) to not date anyone currently might have closed the door on this couple already: Jae Un clearly wants to date Na Bi now. There’s an interesting (and increasingly plausible) scenario that could arise from this:

Na Bi gives in and admits her feelings to him but still rejects him because they need to sort themselves out. Jae Un, impatient and wanting nothing short of a hard ‘yes’, takes this as a total rejection and leaves for America. Na Bi is heart broken once again but moves on. They meet again after he returns and it’s up to the viewer to interpret whether or not they give it a second chance.

Here are the factors that work in Jae Un’s favor: first, that damn explosive attraction he has with Na Bi. Although I think it’s wearing off by episode 8, it’s still a potent force. And the fact that Na Bi still has lingering thoughts and feelings towards him also speaks that she isn’t done with him, much to her dismay. Yes, she’s angry, suspicious, sad with him but if she really didn’t care she wouldn’t feel anything at all. And, despite Na Bi’s better judgment, we know he’s the one she keeps turning to.

Other factors? He’s the fucking main lead. Rarely do kdramas have the girl end up with anyone other than the main lead. Our best boy Do Hyeok isn’t even listed as a second lead. So, that’s something to take into consideration.

But don’t count Do Hyeok out just yet. Let’s talk about him.

Yang Do Hyeok

Best boy. One of three reasons why most of us are watching this mess (the other two being Soljiwan). Do Hyeok, despite all the factors previously mentioned working in favor for Jae Un, continues to represent a strong rival and possible endgame for Na Bi. So, let’s talk about him.

Nevertheless makes the strong case for Jae Un and his type of love but it also makes a strong case for Do Hyeok. He was a bright, yet brief presence in the webtoon and his screen time in the drama has definitely been extended to showcase even more of that sweet, charming smile of his.

I’ve written in a previous post about why Do Hyeok and Na Bi make sense and why their relationship is already so good even though they’re not dating but I’ll simplify for you all here: it’s based on an even playing field and has a strong foundation of friendship already present. Do Hyeok doesn’t leave Na Bi in any doubts about how feels about her; he comforts her when she’s feeling down even after she rejected him; he is attentive and cares for her deeply. And, also, she trusts him implicitly in a way she doesn’t with Jae Un. He makes her smile the most like no one else does. With him, Na Bi is unapologetically happy and carefree that she hasn’t been in a long time.

Do Hyeok’s only flaw is that he has epically bad timing. Which, unfortunately, matters a lot in relationships.

The feelings Na Bi has for Do Hyeok have been complicated by his confession but, in a rare moment of clarity (again something she doesn’t have with Jae Un who only confuses her), she turns him down in order to protect him from herself. So, yes, Do Hyeok is still the childhood best friend but only because Na Bi is keeping him safe. She doesn’t want to disappoint him.

One factor working in Do Hyeok’s favors: he’s still in the drama, for one. Seol-a, Jae Un’s ex, has been absent since episode five (although she’s making her grand return in this next episode). If the show was really done with Do Hyeok, it would have been a done deal by now (well, we’ll see what happens in episode 9) but it tells me that there’s still a plan for him. He’s not merely a distraction or being used for character progression for Na Bi and Jae Un.

The biggest thing going for Do Hyeok right now? He and Na Bi are endgame in the webtoon. There’s been plenty of talk about how they’ve made changes to differentiate the drama from the webtoon but I’ve been talking with others who have read the webtoon and we are in agreement: the changes, while substantial, have been to the characters and not so much the overall narrative. I’m not saying the ending will be exactly the same but I do think it will hit the same beats just in a different, healthier and happy way.

My scenario for Do Hyeok and Na Bi is that she makes the choice to finally ditch Jae Un for good but doesn’t commit to Do Hyeok immediately. She might stay friends with him after asking him to wait for her. We’ll see the set up and consummation for that in episode 10.

(However, since Nevertheless is entirely driven by the characters and their choices you could make the argument that those character changes are enough to warrant a different ending. So, take that as you will.)

Despite all the positive things I have to say about Na Bi and Do Hyeok, I have to stress that nothing is guaranteed here. The preview promises nothing but more pain and angst between Na Bi, Do Hyeok, and Jae Un. That’s the only certainty.

Well. There’s one more certainty. At least, I hope. In fact, it’s the most obvious and clear choice that Na Bi should be making in episode 9 and the one I hope the writers are gearing towards. It’s the only outcome any of us should care about, really.

Yu Na Bi

Yes, you read that right.

This is the only endgame we should really give a shit about. That Yu Na Bi chooses herself, her well being, her happiness, over anything else. Jae Un vs Do Hyeok - it’s not important and never really should have been.

Yes, we can all differ on the opinion of which of these two guys can best help her achieve this but Na Bi really needs to stand on her own to achieve this. Happiness has to come from within; she needs to fix what’s broken inside before she can be in a good relationship.

Na Bi needs to love herself first before anyone else. She deserves that so much. I want that before anything else and if she can get that, I will forgive the writers for all the BS they’ve put us through. And even if she chooses Jae Un. I’ll be happy for her and wishing her well.

(Although, again, Do Hyeok is the only one who gets that she needs to figure this out for herself, BUT it’s still Na Bi’s choice. It’s not that Do Hyeok deserves Na Bi, but she deserves someone sweet and good like Do Hyeok in her life.)

Best of luck to us all, Na Bi, and Do Hyeok tomorrow. It’s the beginning of the end. We’re almost there. Let’s wish them all happy endings.

I’ll leave you all this as the mind set you should have going into episode 9:

[phantompearlsalt]

Sour Cherry, Chapter 17

Preview AND the real deal in one day? I’m on a roll 😎 But in all seriousness: super happy I could share this (more or less) on time with everyone! I’ve started working on a side project I’ll share more about tomorrow so I’m still figuring out my writing schedule. Also promise I’ll respond to all asks this week as well! As always, feel free to check out this chapter on AO3 and know that I adore all kudos, comments, asks, etc. You all make this journey such a gift ❤️

These days, things somehow felt slow and exciting at the same time — it was odd. There was so much at stake and all of it lay within the borders of Republic City. In a few weeks time, Kuvira’s spirit cannon would reach completion and the army would be on its way to claim all that remained to consecrate the Empire.

Although you still find yourself caught up the more bureaucratic aspects of the work — paperwork, meetings, more paperwork — it feels like you can almost touch the weight of anticipation that hangs in the air. Nothing else slows down but everyone appears to hold a collective breath as Baatar works on the final touches of the machine.

Today in particular, you decide to take a trip to engineering. Kuvira is nowhere to be found so you assume she’s off in some pressing meeting with her sergeants. Perhaps strategizing for the City’s response and especially the Avatar’s. Given the scope of the army’s proposed attack, you can’t possibly imagine anyone, not even Korra, withstanding such magnitude of force.

You feel a slight twinge in your chest at the thought of what lies ahead. You think of Bolin, Varrick, and Zhu Li. You wonder whether Raiko will willingly submit to Kuvira and spare the damages that will transpire if he doesn’t.

But at this point, you know better than that. If the United Republic had wanted to end things peacefully, Kuvira would have already reached an accord with them. It was clear no one was willing to budge so you could only hope that the damages would be as minimal as possible.

You stroll into the warehouse, following the sharp sounds of electricity and metal clanking together. A number of privates salute you as you walk past and you offer them reassuring smiles. “At ease, privates,” you chuckle. Despite how much time has passed, you’ll never grow accustomed to the way people interact with you for being both Kuvira’s significant other and a critical role in her Inner Circle.

Baatar recognizes your voice and he looks down from the platform several feet above you. He calls your name excitedly and you can’t help but grin. Admittedly you’ve never been too fond of the man (even back in Zaofu) but you would be wrong to deny all of the incredible work he’s put into bringing the army this far along. Plus, he’s done his best to get on your good side once it became clear his chances with Kuvira were effectively eliminated.

“How’re things going up there?” you call out.

“They’re going,” Baatar responds, somewhat disillusioned. Your brow furrows together and you cross your arms.

“What’s the matter? You don’t sound too pleased,” you remark.

“I can’t seem to make the connection between the cannon and the suit’s body...each piece functions properly on its own but the wiring simply won’t synthesize everything together,” he explains.

“Hm...I’m not sure how much help I could be but could I come check it out at least? If anything it’ll be a good way for me to admire all your handiwork,” you say.

Baatar smiles halfheartedly and sighs. “I suppose. Perhaps there’s something you might notice that I haven’t been able to. Five straight hours can do that to someone,” he admits, leaning over to press the yellow button that unfolds a metal staircase.

Once it lands on the floor with a soft clink, you leap onto it and head up until you’re within an arm’s length from Baatar. Being much closer to him you can see the lines of exhaustion etched below his eyes. His hair is gelled down neatly, though some strands of it fall along his temples where it sticks to a thin film of perspiration.

“Baatar...have you seriously been working on this for five hours straight?” you ask.

He appears confused by the question and purses his lips. “Of course I have. What else would I be working on?” he replies.

“I understand but...you should take a break soon. At least a half hour or something,” you recommend. He vehemently shakes his head in protest.

“Absolutely not. Kuvira wouldn’t allow it and with good reason. Every moment wasted on anything other than this machine is more time lost to take Republic City for the Empire. I will not be the reason everything we’ve worked for is lost,” he states.

You stay quiet, watching him worriedly before you release a soft sigh. You always knew Baatar to be...a deeply passionate man since joining Kuvira. From what you had pieced together during your conversations with her, you learned that he grew up in his father’s shadow. He was always praised as the mirror image of the older Baatar, with an aptitude for design and engineering.

When he joined Kuvira, it was probably the first time in his life that something was entirely his own. Not an addition to his father’s work, not a continuation of everything so many people expected of him. What he created was novel, powerful, and completely his own.

Understandably, he had grown so invested in this final display of his autonomy and innovation that any potential threat to it was unfathomable.

“It’s alright, I understand,” you reassure him, stepping forward and tentatively resting your hand on his forearm. You feel him tense beneath you and you wish he hadn’t because now it feels even more awkward. You’ve never felt the urge to offer him any sort of comfort until now but then he relaxes and you can slide your hand away without feeling too uncomfortable.

“So!” you exclaim, hoping to break the odd tension. “You said you were having trouble connecting the cannon to the rest of the suit?”

“Indeed,” Baatar sighs. He peers into gaping machinery, sifting through thick cords of wiring and metal. “I’ve checked for any and all missing pieces and there isn’t a single thing out of place. I wonder if you’d be able to see anything I might be missing.”

You chew on your lower lip, growing nervous at the prospect of going anywhere near the obviously complicated technology. The chances of you damaging anything are close to none...though they aren’t quite zero.

Nevertheless, you lean forward just an inch to gaze upon the convoluted maze coiled within the massive platinum encasements. None of it makes sense to you and you feel foolish even bothering to check.

Even so, you angle your hand forward and throw Bataar a questioning look. He nods and you start carefully pushing aside the cords in hopes of seeing, well, something.

At the exact moment you feel an indentation in one of the metal fibers, you hear the echo of footsteps below and the sound of Kuvira’s voice. You mean to pull away in excitement but the hem of your sleeve gets caught.

Grumbling, you manage to pull it away but not before feeling a sensation pulse through your body that’s lightning hot and stinging all the same. The pain concentrates in your arm for a split second and your eyes are forced closed.

The only thing you’re aware of is the muffled sound of shouting around you beneath your own screaming before your head crashes against something cold and hard and your vision fades into complete darkness.

---

“This could have been so much worse, Baatar. Do you have any idea how much worse this could have been?”

The voice sounds distant, almost warped, as if it were coming from another room. Wait...are you in a room? It feels still and quiet so you assume you are.

Your eyes are sealed shut and it feels like your brain is trying to push out of your skull. When you try to twitch your fingers, a searing pain shoots up your left arm and a pained sound gets caught in your throat.

Okay. So no moving yet.

You inhale slowly and wince at the sharp ache in your ribs and your chest. Other than that, nothing hurts too bad if you stay relatively still so you focus on maintaining a careful breath.

As you start to grow accustomed to the aches and pains, you let your eyelids flutter open. Well, flutter almost seems too glamorous to describe the heavy feeling when you peel them apart. It feels like you’ve had them shut for weeks.

You try not to move your head around too much as you scan your surroundings, realizing you’re back in the tent you share with Kuvira. The lanterns have been blown out so you assume it’s nighttime until you hear the voices again.

“Kuvira, I apologize profusely for my lapse in judgement. I should have known better than to—”

“You’re right. You should have known better and you didn’t. Baatar, I expect nothing but the utmost professionalism from you and now is not the time to make such potentially fatal errors.”

Though you can’t see anything, you clearly envision what poor Baatar’s face must look like: crumpled in defeat and tight with regret. You want to get up and reassure him you’re okay, though you aren’t really sure what happened in the first place.

Instead, you clear your throat and before you can even open your mouth, Kuvira’s voice whispers something rushedly before she bends the door open and steps inside. You expect to see Baatar join her but she enters alone, sliding it shut and preventing anyone else from entering.

“You’re awake,” Kuvira sighs, rushing over to you and kneeling at your side. Her hands hover over your arm, unsure, and it catches you off guard. Kuvira’s self-assurance rarely falters — when it does, it’s a cause for concern.

“I am,” you affirm, attempting a soft grin before you try to push yourself up. As your left arm protests in agony, you realize it’s been bandaged with multiple layers of thick gauze. Kuvira notices your confused expression and her face grows grim.

“What happened?” you ask. Kuvira stares at your arm for a few moments in thick silence, almost as if her capacity to speak had been plucked from her throat the instant you broached the subject.

“There was a damaged piece of armored cable,” she eventually says. “Between the wiring and what little spirit energy was being transmitted from the suit’s core, it was exposed enough to deliver a shock that knocked you out for hours.”

Ah. So that explained the bandaged arm and why everything else seared in a dull, muted ache.

“Hours? That’s better than what I thought,” you joked. “I could’ve sworn I was out for weeks!” You attempt to laugh but Kuvira finally looks up at you and her expression is so grave it effectively shuts down whatever attempt you make to lighten the situation.

“You could have been,” she hisses. “Had you gotten any closer to that damaged material who knows what could have—I don’t know what I—”

“Kuvira,” you interrupt. Her eyes slide shut and she grips the bedsheet tight, closing her fist over the material with a force that would break anything else if it were more solid. You manage to lift yourself up with your good arm and once you’re upright, you press your palm against her cheek.

“I’m okay, really I am,” you reassure her. “It’s probably just some bruising here and there. Plus my arm will be good in no time, you’ll see.”

“I know that, it’s just…” Kuvira’s voice trails off for a few moments before she can continue. She swallows hard and exhales shakily. “I walked in exactly as it happened and...it looked like you were gone. I heard you scream and when you went quiet, your body hit the ground and I could’ve sworn you...you weren’t there anymore.”

“I’m here now, Kuvira,” you murmur, dragging your thumb over her cheekbone in that way she loves but has never actually verbalized. You maintain a slow pace until you feel Kuvira melt into your touch, her features softening.

“I’m right here with you, alright?” you tell her. “I’m not going anywhere anytime soon. I’m going to be okay and I promise I’ll be more careful. Now why don’t we go on a walk and maybe grab some tea?”

“No,” Kuvira responds quickly. “You stay here and I’ll bring you whatever you need. Besides, it’s late and you should be resting anyway. We’ll spend the night in the tent and see how you’re feeling tomorrow. Just...wait here.”

She leans forward to press her lips against your temple, staying there for a moment, confirming to herself that you’re really alive, and then breaks away with a reluctant stride. You sigh but smile inwardly, leaning back and hoping you get better soon so Kuvira will feel more at ease.

---

True to form, you recover within the span of a few days from the worst of it all. You take it easy in the days immediately succeeding the accident, even finding some spare time to meet with Baatar and assure him there’s no bad blood. He can’t find it in himself to accept forgiveness, though frankly you don’t blame any of it on him. You make it a point to eat the occasional meal with him when time permits...something you never envisioned doing mere months ago.

Character development indeed.

Though your arm takes longer to heal, you get back to work within three days time, albeit with slightly less mobility. Nevertheless, you approach your assignments with the same level of attention and detail as you would any other time.

However, the one thing that remains the same is Kuvira’s unwillingness to stay away from you for longer than thirty minute intervals.

Ever since the accident, she stays by your side almost nonstop except when she’s called away for business that doesn’t involve you. A hand on your waist when you lift yourself off a chair, her arms circling you as you get out of bed, her fingers guiding you towards an exit when there are too many people nearby.

Today, you’re filing away the last of the latest shipment updates from Yi. You sigh and Kuvira looks up from across the room. “Are you alright? Are you in pain?” she asks worriedly.

You bite your lip with hopes that it’ll stop you from rolling your eyes as you shake your head. “I’m fine, Kuvira,” you respond. “Head’s just feeling loaded from all these files. I think I’m going to close out for the day.”

“Of course. Let me take you to our quarters,” Kuvira replies, shoving away whatever she was working on and making her way towards you. She offers you her hand which you take, not without some exasperation.

“I can get there on my own, you know,” you remind her, hoping you don’t come off as too abrasive. Luckily it seems to go over her head because Kuvira is too preoccupied with making sure your knee doesn’t smash against the desk or that the wall doesn’t touch any other part of your body.

“Of course I know that but I won’t let you,” Kuvira says simply. And with that, she guides you back to the tent with one arm wrapped around your waist, her hand digging softly into your side. The guards look on with a mix of sympathetic glances and the occasional teasing grin. You grimace in response and do your best to ignore them, affronted that they’ve become so bold.

You reach the tent and you aren’t sure what look Kuvira gives the guards because they quickly scramble away (or as good as one can scramble in a bulky mech suit) so she can bend the door open. She steps in first, letting you lean on her arm to lift you up the two steps.

“Here, let’s get you into bed,” she murmurs, leading you towards the mattress and releasing your hand as you sit down.

“Kuvira…” You start to say but something in her face makes you stop. You’re tempted to tell her to ease up, that you’re fine and she’s worrying over nothing but you remind yourself what you would’ve felt in her place. You’ve seen Kuvira come close to death too many times and the thought nearly destroyed you.

So you keep quiet because you know she’s not actually being domineering. You hold her hand between both of yours and bring it to your lips, sliding the glove off so you can press your mouth against her bare skin.

“Don’t leave, Kuvira,” you murmur. “Can you...can you stay with me?”

“Of course,” Kuvira whispers, her face losing some of its tension as she sits to your side. She watches you intently and you can’t tell what she’s looking for. Perhaps some indication of pain? Discomfort?

The tent is quiet for some time and when Kuvira breaks the silence her voice is unusually hesitant. “I’m sorry if I’ve made you uncomfortable lately,” she sighs. You look at her and her expression is unreadable.

“What do you mean?” you ask.

“I’m afraid I’ve been rather...overbearing for the past few days. I know you’d never say it outright but I imagine it’s been difficult for you to deal with,” she explains. “I hope you understand why I’ve done it though.”

She adds that last sentence almost as if to reassure herself that her behavior is warranted which, frankly, it absolutely is and it pains you to think she doesn’t believe that.

You press closer to her until your thighs touch, lifting your hand to tilt her face towards yours and cupping your fingers around her jaw.

“Of course I understand, Kuvira. It’s absolutely fine. I can’t expect you to recover from something so frightening in such a short amount of time. I’m sorry if I gave the impression that you had to,” you apologize.

Kuvira exhales sharply and her lips curl into a faint smile. “Never. If anything you’ve been extremely patient for someone who’s had their partner doting on them for almost every waking hour,” she chuckles.

You grin and lean forward until the tip of your nose brushes against Kuvira’s. “Well I can’t say it hasn’t been kind of sweet having the Great Uniter at my beck and call,” you respond slyly.

“But don’t you always?” Kuvira asks, closing the gap between your faces just enough for her lips to nearly graze over your own.

“I suppose you’d think so,” you giggle. “Clearly you’ve been more...zealous as of late, haven’t you?”

Kuvira hums while she slides the other glove off her hand, lifting her fingers until they wrap around the back of your neck. The caress of warm skin produces a thrill that courses all the way down your spine. “May I kiss you?” she whispers and her breath tickles the skin below your ear.

“Please,” you respond, bridging the space that separates you and finally bringing her supple mouth against yours. The kiss is tentative and chaste, so similar to the ones you would share in the early days of your relationship. Kuvira’s hand stays still on your skin, mirroring the carefulness of her mouth, so evidently displaying her anxiety of moving too abruptly for fear of harming you in some way.

So you decide to encourage her further, parting your lips and letting the tip of your tongue playfully brush against hers. Kuvira gasps and jerks backward, her face already tinted a lovely shade of red. It’s an unusual look for her but one that you relish for its rarity.

“What’s the matter? Too much?” you ask. The inquiry comes out sounding much more playful than you’d intended.

“I, um. I guess I didn’t expect that. I thought you would want to take things slow for now,” she elaborates. Kuvira is normally so composed, hyper-aware of every sound and movement she makes especially when she’s being closely observed, which is why you’re pleasantly surprised to see the way her throat clenches as she swallows.

“I’ll take things slow if that’s what you want. Is that what you want, Kuvira?” you ask innocently, lifting your eyebrows and removing your hands from her body. “Do you just want me to kiss you nice and slow...not deeper and harder until you feel your heart pounding against your chest? Not until you start kissing my neck and moving your hand lower and lower...just enough to feel how wet—”

Much to your delight, you’re swiftly cut off when Kuvira seals her mouth over yours again, the force of it strong enough to push you back an inch. You make a pleased sound in your throat and finally throw your arms around her neck, readjusting until you can swing your legs over her thighs and rest upon her lap.

Kuvira’s hands drift mindlessly over your sides, not quite touching but not too far off either. You grow exasperated so you tug on them and wrap them around your hips, grinding downwards so she can feel the growing heat between your legs. How desperately you’ve wanted this for days now.

She moans softly against your mouth and her patience wears thin within moments. Between the havoc you wreak on her lips and the canting motion of your body against her thighs, she eventually cradles you against her arm before placing you onto the mattress on your back.

You gasp in pleasant surprise once she hovers over you. She carries her weight with even greater caution, overly cognizant of potentially pressing down too hard and hurting you.

“What happened to taking it slow?” you tease breathlessly, hovering your fingers over the metal plates on her shoulder. She notices right away and knocks them off with quick work of her hands. They’re tossed onto the ground with a resounding clash.

“I think you should be asking yourself that question,” she responds, leaning down until her lips dance across your neck. “What was that you were mentioning earlier?” she whispers against you, dragging her tongue along the skin that isn’t covered by your uniform.

Your body instantly arches upward, feeling Kuvira’s breasts press against your chest. Between the accident and how busy everything already was before that, it had been weeks since you’ve been with her like this.

Therefore it’s no surprise that your body responds accordingly.

“Now don’t tell me you’ve gone all soft on me,” Kuvira says, pushing away the collar of your uniform and carefully sinking her teeth into the flesh at the base of your neck. You’re at a total loss for words, the sounds and syllables dissipating with each brush of Kuvira’s mouth on your body.

“Because that would be such a shame. I do love it when you make me work for it,” she sighs. Her hands, firm yet careful nonetheless, drift downwards until one rests over your hip. Even through the layers of fabric, her touch produces a sensation like fire that spreads from the point of contact all the way to each bit of muscle and nerve.

“But you also love it when I’m completely at your mercy, don’t you?” you shoot back, rather proud that your voice isn’t as weak as you expected it to be. Kuvira cocks an eyebrow and removes her mouth from your neck. You mourn the loss momentarily but keep going.

“You can’t deny it, Kuvira,” you continue, your eyes widening with glee. “I’ve seen the look in your eyes when you have me all tied up, completely and utterly at your disposal for whatever you desire. Haven’t you missed that? The way I’m completely helpless when you bind me up and all I can do is wait to see what you’ll do next.”

“It sounds like you’ve been thinking about this for some time,” Kuvira exhales, already short of breath.

“Oh I certainly have. And given how you can barely get through an entire sentence without gasping for air, I’d say you’re quite a fan of the prospect yourself,” you murmur.

“Are you sure? You’re not in any pain at all? I don’t want to hurt you,” Kuvira says quietly, the lustful look on her face morphing into one of concern.

You nod assuredly and shyly press your lips to hers again. “Yes, I’m absolutely sure. We’ve got our word, remember? I’ll let you know if I need you to stop.”

Kuvira nods against your touch and moves her hand to the back of your neck once more, this time undoing the buttons that hold the article together and lifting your arms to pull it away. The fabric bunches up around your bandaged forearm and though the gauze isn’t as thick anymore, it’s enough to make you both pause.

You bite back the laughter flooding your mouth and Kuvira looks vaguely irritated. Nevertheless, she approaches the minor hiccup with her usual, unhurried maneuvers until it slides away and you’re only covered by a soft undershirt.

The scars beneath the gauze start throbbing a bit but you manage to keep the worst at bay. It’s nothing too bad — nothing worth paying much attention to.

Kuvira spends the next few moments showering kisses, bites, and caresses over every inch of skin she can reach with her mouth. She takes you apart with slow and intentional movements until all you can do is lay frenzied with desire beneath her ministrations and attempt to hold back the pathetically desperate sounds that fall from your lips.

She begins to lift up the undershirt until it glides over and off your head and falls to the ground, along with the growing heap of Kuvira’s clothes mixed with your own. She keeps your arms high above your head, sliding her fingers over your skin and pauses. When she stops, you realize your eyes have been shut so you snap them open and look down at her impatiently.

“Don’t you worry...I’ve got exactly what you’ve been waiting for,” she murmurs. Kuvira lifts her hands and starts to coil her fingers. You hear the sharp sound of metal sliding against metal and then you see two silver strips emerging from her abandoned uniform. They float menacingly above your bodies, gradually curling into crescent shapes that hover over your wrists.

“I think it’s about time,” Kuvira whispers. Not a moment is wasted between the time she utters those words and the sensation of frigid metal clasping around your wrists, pulling your arms together and holding you down tight.

You’re met with an immediate burst of exhilaration and you ride it for about five seconds before it’s overridden with a growing feeling of discomfort that spreads under your bandages. You do your best to ignore it and instead focus on Kuvira moving downwards until she reaches the hem of your trousers.

“Now let’s see just how much you’ve wanted this,” she purrs against your hip, clipping her teeth over the edge of the fabric and using it to guide her hands as they slide it off. She’s soon met with the throbbing heat nestled between your thighs and you sigh in shameless pleasure.

As delicious as it feels, the pain in your arm only intensifies with each passing moment. You attempt to zero in on Kuvira’s mouth brushing against your bare hip, your thigh, the feeling of her lips hovering over the wet fabric of your underwear. It becomes overwhelming — the tension of wanting more but feeling your arm quiver with increasing pain.

“May I?” Kuvira asks, hooking her finger over the thin fabric and hinting at tearing it off. You murmur a quivering “yes” and hope she can’t sense the discomfort in your voice. She promptly removes them, dragging them down your legs and pressing her face against the crease where your hip meets your thigh.

It’s such an unbearable union of tender and carnal that it makes your body jerk hard against the restraints. The material digs into your injury just enough to make you cry out in distress.

“Silver, Kuvira! Silver,” you grunt through gritted teeth. Kuvira immediately breaks away and bends the metal strips off from your arms. They land on the floor with a harsh sound that makes you flinch.

“What do you need? What should I do?” she asks calmly. It would almost startle you how quickly she manages to shift tonalities but right now, it brings you a comfort you didn’t realize you needed.

“My arm...it-it stings,” you mumble, carrying it down until it rests on your abdomen. “I just need a second. Maybe that healing salve?”

“Of course. Stay still, alright? I’ve kept it in my desk,” Kuvira reassures, leaning down to press a kiss against your forehead and leaping off the bed. She throws a spare bed sheet over her body as she strides across the room, shuffling through a drawer until she finds the salve and a sealed green pouch.

She kneels on the bed and slides her arm around your bare back to help lift you up with little pressure. Once you’re upright, she gingerly takes your injured arm between her hands and begins to unfold the gauze.

The skin that emerges is marred with a thin layer of scarred flesh, much less angry than how it appeared just last week. Kuvira uncovers the glass jar and scoops a portion of the salve onto two fingers that she presses against the wound.

It feels awful at first, almost exacerbating the pain, but it gradually melts into a refreshing coolness that numbs the discomfort. You hiss a bit at the beginning and Kuvira lifts her hand away.

“Is it too much?” she murmurs. “I’m not pressing down too hard, am I?”

You shake your head adamantly. “No, not at all,” you respond. “You’re totally fine. Just stung at first. It feels good now, I promise.”

Kuvira nods in understanding, rubbing the last of the substance onto your skin and pulling open the small pouch. She pulls out a long strip of gauze that she untangles and starts folding over your arm, sealing the salve’s properties against the scars.

She moves smoothly, indicative of one who has done this many times before. You wonder how often she had tended to others’ wounds as a guard in Zaofu.

“You’re all set,” she affirms once she ties it all together. She rests her hand over her handiwork, stroking her thumb over the material and looking up at you concernedly. “What else do you need?”

“I hate to say it but I think you were right,” you chuckle. “I think...I just want to sleep now. Do you, uh...do you mind, er—holding me?”

Kuvira’s face brightens even in the darkness of the tent and she nods, guiding your bodies back down to the bed so she can curl her body around yours, mindful of where your injured arm rests. Your legs tangle with hers as Kuvira tugs a thick blanket over your shoulders, bringing you closer to her chest until your forehead touches her collarbone.

The silence is comfortable, soothing. Exactly what you need. But you can’t shake the slight degree of embarrassment that clings to your thoughts.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper.

“You don’t have to apologize for anything,” Kuvira murmurs. “I know you want to...and I understand. I won’t scold you for it but just know you don’t have to. I’m glad you told me. That’s what we do, right? Honesty.”

You nod against her and swallow. “You’re right...I appreciate it,” you respond. And though you don’t exchange any more words for what remains of the evening before you fall asleep, you lose yourself in the calming silence that follows. Kuvira’s hands float up and down your back and your shoulders, guiding you into a dreamless sleep that welcomes you with warmth and safety.

[kpop-zone]

A Little Longer | Jennie

Warnings: NSFW

Genre: angst, a little smut

Wordcount: 6,609

Request: Sentence prompt with blackpink jennie: “I don’t want to be alone right now.” 

A/N: Inspired by Bang Chan’s “I Hate To Admit It”

Part 2 Part 3

From past relationships, you knew how hard breakups could be. No matter how long the relationship lasted or how mutual the breakup was, there was always a part of you that felt empty after the other left your life. But you could have never guessed how hard your breakup with Jennie would be.

Everyone around you probably thought that you were fine. But you knew that there hadn’t been one day since Jennie walked out of your life almost a year ago that you hadn’t thought about her. Of course, your world kept spinning. You managed to land a great promotion at work and your friends were a great distraction. Nevertheless, you couldn’t stop your heart from aching, every time you saw something that reminded you of her.

Which was basically everything.

You had dated for three years, so it seemed like you had been at every place in the city together. When you were in the supermarket, you thought of her when you saw her favorite brand of chips. When you walked past a dog park, you thought about the times the two of you played there with Kuma and Kai. It was driving you insane. It seemed like your body physically reacted to the memories with her, making all of your limbs feel numb and heavy. Things that usually shouldn’t be straining felt like a full-body workout, because all of your energy had evaporated into thin air the day Jennie had left you behind. You hated the power that she still had over you although she wasn’t even near you. Especially since you seemed to be the only one that was suffering. Jennie had not only managed to move on from you after the breakup, no, it seemed like she had already moved on while the two of you were still dating.

“Look! This one kind of looks like Kuma.”

You giggled while pointing at one of the cookies that you just had shaped.

After a long time, Jennie finally had a day off and you decided to spend it in the shelter of your own four walls to do some domestic activities. It gave variety to your usually hectic days and you found yourself being completely immersed in this lifestyle. So immersed that you didn’t even notice how Jennie had stopped decorating the cookies and was looking at you instead.

“I think, I don’t want to do this anymore.”

She stated and you giggled in response.

“It’s ok. This is the last tray. I can finish it on my own and then we’ll do something else.”

Although you were having the time of your life right now, you didn’t mind doing something else. As long as the two of you did it together, you could be out there picking up trash and you would probably still be smiling.

“I didn’t mean the cookies.”

Jennie responded somewhat coldly, making you look up from the tray. You cocked your head to the side in confusion.

“I don’t want to do this anymore.”

She repeated her statement while pointing between the two of you.

Theoretically you understood what she was referring to, but practically you had trouble wrapping your head around it.

“W-what?”

You stuttered in disbelief and Jennie huffed.

“Look, Y/N. Don’t make this more complicated than it has to be. I’m sure you have noticed the change in our dynamic lately too.”

In your dynamic? You couldn’t belief how callously Jennie was talking right now. Wordlessly you stared at her while thinking about the past weeks. Of course, you hadn’t had much time for each other because of Jennie’s schedule, but you had always anticipated the days that you could spend together.

“No, quite frankly, I have not noticed that.”

You answered honestly, causing Jennie to massage the bridge of her nose.

“Jennie, if this is about the lack of time, we had for each other lately, I don’t want you to worry about that. I know your schedule has been crazy these past weeks, but there will be-“

“It hasn’t.”

Jennie cut you short and once more you felt like you were lacking some information to make sense out of all of this.

“Of course, I had some appointments, but I still had enough free time. I just didn’t come home, because... I had better things to do.”

Her words had managed to break through the wall of confusion that had surrounded you till now and left a deep cut in your heart.

Better things.

Those words played over and over again in your head like a broken record.

“I’m sorry if I’m too blunt, but I feel like it’s time we stop the charades.”

She continued, but you wished that she had stayed quiet. You had been nothing but honest in this relationship. Every confession, every love declaration, every compliment had been the truth. But apparently you had been the only one.

You wanted to scream at Jennie for being so heartless, but your body felt weak as tears started streaming down your cheeks. You trembled in anger, disappointment and pain. But there were no traces of those emotions in Jennie’s eyes. She looked bored. As if she was just sticking around a while to be polite before being able to close this chapter.

“Go.”

You choked out, causing Jennie to look at you. For a second her gaze lingered on you, but then she leaped to her feet uncomplainingly and grabbed her stuff before leaving you behind. No apology, no regret; just as if these past three years hadn’t happened.

As soon as the front door fell in its locks, you broke down to the floor and gasped for air. The walls around you seemed to close in on you and you curled up into a ball in search for protection. But no matter how tightly you tried to hold yourself together, your heart was ripped wide open.

How long had she only been playing with you?

“Earth to Y/N! Hello!!”

You were suddenly shaken by your shoulders, causing you to snap out of your memories.

“Dude, are you crying?”

Tami, one of your best friends and co-workers, asked perplexed.

You hadn’t even realized how deep you had been engulfed in your thoughts until you tasted the salt of your tears on your lips. Quickly you wiped your cheeks and put a smile on your lips.

“No, pabo. My allergies have just been hitting me hard lately. What have you been saying?”

Tami looked at you skeptically for a second, but then she decided that her urge to tell you something was more important than your weird behavior.

“I’ve been asking you what you will be wearing tonight.”

Tonight? Confused you sifted through your calendar mentally but couldn’t think of any birthday parties or other invites.

“The vernissage?”

Tami continued annoyed as she noticed that you couldn’t follow.

You grunted in response and let your head fall to your desk. You had totally forgotten, no, repressed that event that was marked with a scull in your calendar.

While Jennie and you had still been dating, the two of you had often went out together. Visiting bars, having dinner at fancy restaurants, accepting the invites of her high society friends to their million-dollar mansions. Your relationship surely had never been boring. Jennie’s network ranged throughout the whole city and as time passed, parts of her network became yours too. Most of her friends were actually a lot more approachable than they seemed at first and you eventually found yourself hanging with them even when Jennie wasn’t with you.

One of them was Jiyong. He had always been rather down to earth despite his extravagant clothing style and millions of dollars in his bank account, making him weasel his way into your heart in no time. And even after the breakup, he had assured you his friendship, leading to this dilemma now. His invite to his vernissage had reached you a few weeks ago and since then you had been trying to find a way to avoid it. You couldn’t just deny his invite, because you knew how important the event was for him. But you really didn’t want to go either, because she would be there.

Jennie and Jiyong had already been friends long before you. He was one of the few friends, she actually liked and kept by her side. Therefore, you knew that she wouldn’t miss his first big vernissage. Of course, you had told yourself in the course of the past weeks that meeting Jennie on neutral ground wouldn’t be an issue; after all, you had broken up a year ago already. But even if you hated to admit it, you knew that this wasn’t true. If walking past a dog park made your heart ache, you were sure that seeing Jennie would probably knock the air out of your lungs and make you suffocate.

Somehow you needed to get out if this death trap.

“You’re not thinking about bailing last minute, right?”

As if she could read your thoughts, Tami looked at you suspiciously with one eyebrow raised after you had been quiet for a while.

“I really don’t want to go.”

You whined, causing your best friend to huff in frustration.

“What is your deal, Y/N? Of course, it’s hard to meet your ex, but it’s not like you’re still mourning after her.”

She exclaimed annoyed and you avoided her gaze; if only she knew.

“I don’t know. It’s just... not really my thing. All those rich people and the paparazzi.”

You lied, but you knew that Tami wouldn’t take no for an answer.

“You’re right, that sounds absolutely terrible. Getting free champagne, eating appetizer from a five-star Michelin chef and flirting with millionaires. Such an agony.”

She responded mockingly and you wished that you had never asked her to be your plus one in the first place. But Jiyong had given you two tickets and it was clear from the beginning that you wouldn’t be able to go there without some moral support.

“We’re going, Y/N. Wear something fancy, I’m picking you up at 7.”

Tami concluded your discussion without waiting for an answer before returning to her desk again and leaving you with your thoughts.

A bad feeling in the pit of your stomach was telling you that this night would become a disaster. It made your anxiety increase tenfold and when it was 7 at last, you felt like throwing up. But precisely when the clock reached the full hour, your doorbell rang, indicating the arrival of Tami. For a second, you toyed with the idea of just hiding under your covers and ignoring all of your responsibilities. Then, however, you remembered Jiyong’s text that he had sent you earlier in which he thanked you for your support despite the struggles that you would have to go through because of it. With a huff, you accepted your fate before grabbing all of your necessities and walking to the front door.

“Are you ready???”

Tami greeted you with her shrill voice as soon as you swung the door open, making you flinch in surprise.

“Yeah.”

You cheered less then excited. But Tami didn’t care; quickly she interlinked your arms and pulled you to the elevator.

“This is going to be the best night ever!”

She yelled, making you believe that you’d probably soon have a headache additionally to your nausea.

Your lack of enthusiasm, however, didn’t keep Tami from gushing nonstop till you reached the location of the vernissage. It was an old warehouse with a rundown façade, but the sportscars parked in front of it with their overdressed passengers gave away that this place was far from being an ordinary building. People of all kinds lined up in front of it although it was clear that some of them were nowhere near to being given access by the scary looking bouncers. Nevertheless, they had the chance to sniff the air of the rich and glamorous, even if it was just by looking from the outside in.

“Wow.”

Tami gaped next to you when she saw all the VIPs dressed in their expensive-looking clothes passing the bouncers with ease. Her pace got slower with every step and you ended up pulling her to the door where the bouncer eyed you dismissively.

“Invite.”

He murmured impolitely, probably thinking that you were just two wannabes. After dating Jennie for three years though, you were already used to it. Flashing him a big smile, you dug out your invite and shoved it into his hands. Perplexed he scanned the paper before giving you a suspicious look.

“Name.”

His demand was even ruder than before and you needed to swallow a snarky comment.

“Y/N L/N.”

You hissed instead, waiting for the satisfaction that would come a second later when he’d realize that you were actually invited.

Expectedly his eyes widened when he found your name on the list and reluctantly, he let you pass to get inside. You flashed him a last triumphant smile before entering the building where you were greeted by a turmoil of people and some futuristic beats. The room was larger than expected and decorated with Jiyong’s artworks whose illumination was the only source of light.

“This place looks amazing.”

Tami whispered as if her voice could disturb the mysterious and extravagant atmosphere.

But despite the amazing artworks and the carefully designed interior, your focus was not where it was supposed to be. Attentively you scanned the faces of the guests instead. Not with the intent of finding any A-list celebrities like Tami, but with the intent of finding the one person that you were not hoping to find.

“She’s not here, yet.”

A sudden voice from beside you made you jump in surprise.

It was Jiyong who had apparently managed to look right through you after taking one glance at you. Sheepishly you grinned before opening your arms to invite him for a hug.

“Everything is so beautiful. You can be really proud of yourself.”

You said to distract from the fact that you had been caught red-handed.

“Yeah right. I’m sure you have been looking at my art.”

He responded doubtingly, causing you to blush. Gratefully, however, Tami cleared her throat next to you in need for attention, saving you from an unpleasant conversation about your miserable state even one year after the breakup.

“Ah yes, this is Tami, Jiyong. My co-worker and a really good friend of mine.”

You introduced Tami who immediately started buttering up Jiyong with compliments, causing you to roll your eyes. You looked at the scene in front of you for a while until secondhand embarrassment took over your body and you decided to save both of your friends.

“Come on, let’s look at the art.”

Tami looked obviously displeased when you pulled her away from Jiyong who was starting to feel a little uncomfortable because of the exuberant attention.

“We were totally vibing.”

She hissed once you were out of Jiyong’s earshot and you just chuckled in response. That girl would probably play every trick to get herself the number of a millionaire tonight.

You wished that you had been able to place a bet on that as Tami was out of sight not even a minute later after running off to snap some pictures with a famous fashion blogger. You, on the other hand, couldn’t be less interested in the other guests of tonight. You just wanted to dawdle away the bare minimum of time to be able to flee the scene without being impolite. Therefore, you combed through Jiyong’s artworks instead while trying to stay clear of all people in order to avoid making unpleasant encounters. But despite your friend’s obvious talent, you couldn’t enjoy his event. The fear of accidentally running into Jennie was breathing down your neck, although you had been able to fight your nausea with the hope of being able to leave before her arrival.

Your hope was destroyed though, when a murmur suddenly went through the crowd. Like magnets, the guests were pulled to the entrance and you didn’t need to turn around to know that she had arrived. You kept your gaze stubbornly fixated on one of Jiyong’s paintings, but you couldn’t block out the whispers around you.

“Look at her dress.”

“Wow her skin is glowing.”

“She’s even prettier in person.”

People gasped left and right to you and it felt like someone was twisting your heart. Only the thought of being in the same room with her made you feel nauseous again and you anxiously started chewing on your lip. Your body almost ached because you were refusing to turn around, but your brain forbade you to give in to the temptation. With every second the whispers got louder, indicating that Jennie was getting closer to you. You clenched your fists as you concentratedly tried to keep staring ahead while fighting your own heart that was screaming at you to finally look at her.

Did she look different? Was she looking for you like you did for her?

Your curiosity was killing you, making your head turn involuntarily to the side like Jennie was radiating some sort of gravitational force. A quick glance over the shoulder couldn’t harm anybody, right? You would allow yourself to look at her just for a second to appease your thirst; nothing more.

But as soon as Jennie stepped into your field of vision, all of your resistance crumbled. Your breath hitched in your throat and everything around her became blurry as you were only able to see her. Her feline eyes were scanning the dumbfounded crowd while a smirk on her lips was giving away how much she loved the attention. You hated her smugness, but at the same time it was making your knees feel weak. She was radiating pure power and superiority, making you realize that she was like a drug that you were addicted to. Only seeing her was energizing you more than anything else in the past year. Finally, you were feeling like yourself again and your thirst for more grew.

You needed more of your drug. You needed more of Jennie.

Your feet were about to follow the draw that was pulling you to her when your trance was suddenly disturbed by the increasingly loud murmurs. Confused, you furrowed your brow as the blocked-out background started to come to the fore. You were able to see the bigger picture again and noticed how the chatter of the people had gotten more agitated. Groups of people were sticking their heads together while eyeing Jennie derogatorily causing her smirk to falter. Suddenly she didn’t look arrogant anymore; suddenly she looked like your Jennie again. The girl that was afraid of thunder and preferred to watch Disney movies because all of the other movies were too suspenseful for her.

You tried to understand the chatter around you, but it was too jumbled. Nevertheless, it took no genius to know that they were talking badly about your ex. You knew that you should probably feel some sort of satisfaction right now; after all she had chipperly ripped your heart out without any form of regret, just to eat you alive and spit you out again. It should make you feel good to know that karma was coming for her. But of course, you didn’t enjoy seeing her suffering. She looked so lost in that moment and you cursed yourself for wanting to wrap your arms around her and whisper sweet nothings into her ear to comfort her. But unfortunately, that wasn’t your place anymore. Instead, all you could do was to try picking up some words from around you to figure out what was going on.

“Dating scandal.”

Those two words suddenly sounded clearly directly next to you and you jumped in surprise before turning your head. Jiyong had once again managed to sneak up on you. He was standing next to you with a champagne glass in his hand while zeroing in on Jennie.

“Huh?”

You asked confused, making him look at you.

“She has been entangled in another dating scandal. That’s why the crowd is being especially wild around her tonight. Some hope for more gossip, while others just want a piece of her fame.”

He explained and your heart clenched.

Not, however, because you learned that Jennie had been in another relationship in the meantime. You hadn’t expected anything less from her. She was the embodiment of grace and perfection, so it was to no surprise that she had captured someone else in her net of temptations. No, what hurt you more was the fact that once again people seemed to forget that Jennie was just human. Like vultures they were surrounding her, waiting for a slip in order to pounce on her and tear her down.

Over and over again, they criticized her for the stupidest things. Every step that she took was supervised, leaving her scared and insecure after being in the industry for so long. But no one seemed to notice. Everyone else only saw her perfect smile and sublime demeanor. It was all just a game for them for their entertainment. A game with no regard for fatalities.

Silently you unlocked the door and tiptoed into the house. After you had read the news, nothing could hold you at work anymore and you faked sick to leave early. Blackpink had showcased their comeback yesterday. Jennie had been incredibly nervous beforehand, but you had assured her that all of her hard work would pay off and that there would be nothing to worry about. But once more the netizens proved you wrong.

Today an enormous amount of hate comments about Jennie were flooding the internet. Bad dancer. Weak link of Blackpink. Lazy. The usual insults were thrown at your girlfriend’s head and when you texted her to check up on her, you received no answer. You knew that this could only mean that she had read the news and had broken down again.

Carefully you entered her room and saw her balled up on her bed.

“Baby?”

You whispered softly once you were standing in front of her, but you got no reaction out of her.

Her trembling shoulders, however, were giving away that she wasn’t sleeping but crying instead. Therefore, you sat down on the edge of her bed and gently brushed some hair out of her face. Although the room was only dimly lit, you could see that Jennie’s eyes were red and puffy, causing you to almost wince in pain.

“They hate me, Y/N.”

She sobbed silently and you instantly lifted her up to pull her into your arms.

“They are just jealous, jagi. Fame always comes with hate. But there are so many people that love you; so many.”

You whispered into her ear, but her sobs kept echoing in the room. Helplessly you pressed her against your body in hopes to give her the comfort that she needed while you were lacking any words to make her feel better.

If only you could find a way to make all of this hate go away.

Unfortunately, you never found a way though. Your relationship with Jennie continued to be a cycle of your girlfriend soaring through the sky due to all the praise in one moment and hitting rock bottom the next. And now a year after your breakup, it didn’t seem to be much different; only that you weren’t there anymore to pick up the pieces.

A mixture of guilt and hatred for the people around you made your skin crawl and you could feel your irritation getting the better of you.

“Excuse me.”

You said to Jiyong before storming off into the direction of the restrooms to avoid seeing Jennie’s broken figure any longer.

With all your power, you swung open the door of the restroom, making it slam loudly against the wall. But you couldn’t care less, you needed to do something to get rid of your anger. With big steps, you headed straight for the sink where you looked at yourself in the mirror. Your breath was fast and shallow like you had just run a marathon. Once again, your feelings for Jennie caused a physical reaction in you against your will.

Quickly you turned on the tap and splashed some water on your cheeks in hopes to cool your head. Your thoughts were racing, and you needed to slow them down to prevent a short circuit in your brain. Closing your eyes, you focused on your breathing and gradually managed to slow it down along with your heartbeat.

This was none of your business anymore, you thought. Jennie wasn’t yours. She had probably never been. Her actions were her responsibility and it wasn’t your job to fix her. It was a hard pill to swallow, but maybe tonight could be your wake-up call. It was time to let your brain guide you again, instead of your heart. Therefore, you kept reasoning with yourself until you couldn’t feel your heart jumping out of your chest anymore. When you opened your eyes again, you sternly looked at yourself in the mirror.

“None.Of.Your.Freaking.Business.”

You warned yourself as you were still struggling to ban all thoughts of Jennie from your mind. Maybe you could speak your disinterest into existence.

Like a mantra, you kept mumbling this sentence under your breath while touching up your appearance until you were pleased with the outcome. With determination you nodded to yourself in the mirror before feeling ready to leave the restroom. Maybe you weren’t ready yet to meet Jennie, but you surely felt confident enough to be in one room with her and just let her be. With newfound positivity, you swung open the door, only to find your confidence being destroyed a second later. Another person was almost running down the hallway with their face lowered and buried behind their hands. There was no time for you to get out of the way, causing the two of you to bump shoulders. Only then, the person lifted their head and with wide eyes, you realized that it was Jennie who seemed to be fleeing from the crowd.

“Y/N.”

She breathed evidently surprised when her gaze met yours. It seemed like she hadn’t expected anyone to be here, especially not you. There were tears in her eyes and the smug look from before had disappeared. Concern immediately washed over you, leaving nothing of the newfound determination behind. Jennie, however, noticed your pitiful look, making her put up her façade again. As if there weren’t tears shimmering in her eyes, she flashed you a gummy smile.

“It’s been a while! How are you doing?”

Jennie asked overly cheerful.

You didn’t know what hurt you more. Suddenly being so close to her or having to watch how she pretended to be fine once again when she obviously wasn’t. Why did she always have to mime the strong one?

But despite knowing that she was hurting herself, you still felt inferior to her. Something about her always managed to make you feel weak. Her feline eyes were scanning all the details in your face and you felt yourself getting nervous under her gaze. It was melting away the little rest of confidence that you had been guarding, leaving you vulnerable and scared. Looking into Jennie’s face, threw you back to the day, she had decided that she didn’t want to be yours anymore. Like every day the past year, the memories choked you up and made you wordlessly stare at Jennie.

“Y/N?”

Only her soft voice was able to break your train of thoughts and you cleared your throat to recollect yourself.

“Um... fine. I’m perfectly fine.”

You lied while avoiding her eyes. Suddenly, however, a sensation on your hand made you jump in surprise. You snapped up your gaze to see that Jennie had reached out to touch your hand.

“That’s a lie.”

She simply stated, causing you to reflexively back away to protect your personal space.

“W-what? Don’t be silly.”

You chuckled nervously, but it seemed like your insecurity had suddenly turned a switch inside of Jennie, causing her confidence to return. She took a step forward while eyeing you with a piercing gaze.

“Really? Then why are you shaking?”

Only now you realized that the adrenaline that was rushing through your veins right now was making you tremble. Quickly you hid your hands behind your back to save your face.

“I’m not.”

Your answer made Jennie chuckle and a cold shudder ran down your spine. It seemed like she had found a distraction from the pain that was probably still pulling at her heartstrings because of earlier; she had found a prey that she could easily bring down despite being ailing herself. But you wouldn’t let her torture you, just to make her feel better. You wouldn’t go down without a fight.

“How are you though? I heard about the dating scandal.”

Your voice wasn’t as confident as you would have wanted it to be, but you could still see in Jennie’s face that you had struck a nerve. A dark shadow flashed over it and you almost grinned, because you had finally won the upper hand. Your smugness faltered a second later, however, when a new flame flared up in Jennie’s eyes.

“What can I say, fame always comes with hate.”

Emotionlessly, she repeated your words from all those years ago, causing you to gulp thickly. If you had wanted to bring out the vulnerable girl in Jennie, you had failed miserably. Instead, you seemed to have poked the flame in her that wanted to consume you.

“Do you remember how you used to take care of me when I was involved in another scandal?”

Jennie asked while inching closer to you.

You didn’t know what intentions she had right now, but you were sure that they were not of the good kind. Jennie always had been an asserter of unhealthy coping mechanisms and the humiliation from before had deeply hurt her, even if she tried to play it cool. Someone needed to pay for it, and something was telling you that this would be you.

With her eyes fixed on you, Jennie creeped closer while you kept stumbling backwards. Eventually, however, you backed against the door of the restroom, leaving you trapped and defenseless against Jennie’s attack.

“I miss those times.”

Your heart missed a beat as Jennie said exactly the words that you had wanted to hear.

You were aware that they were a lie. But your brain didn’t seem to be strong enough to make you act by your better knowledge. Instead you stood perfectly still as Jennie was now standing directly in front of you, in order to calmly, but surely take down all the pillars that were supporting your defiance.

“Jennie.”

You breathed with your last willpower while pushing her away halfheartedly.

Your resistance was of no use, however, as Jennie leaned into you, making you feel her hot breath against your neck.

“I just don’t want to be alone right now.”

She said barely above a whisper, but you understood every word clearly as her lips were only inches next to your ear. A shudder ran down your spine and you had to fight a moan that was threatening to leave your mouth. Every part of your body was tingling in anticipation for Jennie’s touch now.

She immediately noticed the change in your demeanor, causing her to push down the handle of the restroom door in order to shove you inside. In lightning speed, she checked all the stalls for any unwanted spectators before locking the door. You gulped thickly as you were standing helplessly in the middle of the room like a lamb in front of a slaughterer. Your brain was telling you to run while the rest of your body was telling you to stay, leaving you paralyzed. A mischievous smirk was playing on Jennie’s lips as she was walking towards you while swaying her hips seductively. She hadn’t even touched you yet, but the heat between your legs was already making you shift uncomfortably from one leg to the other. Jennie laughed sardonically when she noticed your desperate state and pushed you backwards until you were pressed against the sink.

“Impatient, are we?”

She hummed and you lowered your head in embarrassment. You didn’t know what you hated more. The fact that you were still so affected by her or the fact that Jennie knew about it.

“Don’t be embarrassed, baby. I’ve made you wait too long, haven’t I?”

Her fingers sneaked under your chin to lift your head up. She made you meet her eyes while her other hand unbuttoned your pants. Attentively, she watched your reaction while wallowing in the satisfaction that your obedience gave her.

“Lucky for you, we don’t have all night. So I won’t make you wait any longer.”

With those words, she crashed her lips into yours, not hesitating to slip her tongue into your mouth. But you didn’t mind. Like she had said, you had waited way too long for this. Your arms found their way around her neck to pull her closer as Jennie put her hands on your hips. She detached your lips to kiss along your jawline down to your neck where she sucked on your pulse point. You closed your eyes immediately to indulge in the sensation. Jennie had always known how to work the weaknesses of your body perfectly.

While she made sure to mark your neck, one of her hands sneaked under your shirt to your breasts where she gave your left one a firm squeeze. A moan escaped your mouth that was cut short though when the handle of the restroom door was suddenly pushed down. Automatically, you straightened up and pushed Jennie back who looked at you disapprovingly.

“It’s locked, babe. Don’t worry.”

Calmly she pressed you back in place, but you couldn’t stop glancing at the door.

“But...”

You started, but Jennie shut you up with a kiss.

“They can use the other bathroom. But I promise to make it quick.”

With a swift movement, Jennie pulled down your pants along with your panties. She pressed you harshly against the sink, making you yelp loudly when your bare skin came in contact with the cold surface. You could spot a smirk on Jennie’s lips just before she attached her lips to yours again; she was enjoying this way too much. She kissed you roughly, making you feel breathless and desperate for more. You were sure that the wetness between your legs was starting to drip down by now, causing you to press your legs together. Jennie, however, immediately protested as she was exploring your ass and inner thighs with her hand.

“Uh uh.”

She shook her head and spread your legs again.

“Let me help you with that.”

Suddenly you felt two fingers thrusting into your entrance without a warning. You gripped the edge of the sink hard, turning your knuckles white in order to stop you from screaming profanities. Jennie didn’t hesitate to start pumping her fingers while circling your clit with her thumb, making your legs begin to feel like jelly. Noticing your struggle, Jennie pressed you harder against the sink with her lower body while wrapping her arm around your waist to steady you. As the knot in your stomach was beginning to grow you pulled her closer to you and buried your face in the crook of her neck to muffle your moans that were steadily getting louder.

“Why don’t you let me hear your moans? You sound so beautiful.”

Jennie complained before pushing you back to be able to kiss you again. Soon you were running out of breath though as her fingers kept slipping in and out of you, causing you to throw your head back to gasp for air. The pressure in your stomach wanted to be released, but Jennie chose to move her fingers in a torturing slow pace to tease you a little longer. Impatiently you rolled your hips against Jennie’s hand, but she pulled away every time you were close to hitting the right spot, causing you to whine involuntarily.

“Does that feel good?”

Jennie asked teasingly while nibbling on your earlobe.

“Please...”

You choked out, desperate for her to stop this torture.

“Only because you asked so nicely.”

She giggled before licking along your jawline and finally picking up the pace of her fingers. She thrusted deep inside you, making you unable to control your moans anymore. The room was filled with your panting, the sound of your wetness and eventual curse words that rolled over your tongue when Jennie hit the right spot. It didn’t take long till you could feel yourself chasing your high, making you desperately cling to Jennie in fear that your legs would give in. Your fingers entangled in her hair, but she didn’t stop pumping in and out of you, sending you over the edge eventually. All the tension left your body at once and your hips stutteringly bucked forward to ride your high as long as possible. Only when you felt like you couldn’t take any more, Jennie finally removed her fingers and pushed herself off you. Shakily you propped yourself against the sink while trying to catch your breath.

Although you had shared this form of intimacy a hundred times before, you could feel yourself getting shy as you were standing in front of Jennie exposed like that. She, on the other hand, showed no signs of shame or embarrassment; as a matter of fact, she wasn’t showing any emotions at all. Nonchalantly, she walked to the sink next to you to wash her hands before fixing her hair and makeup. Dumbfounded you watched her while waiting for your legs to follow your commands again. Jennie, however, didn’t pay any attention to you. Only when her appearance was back to her satisfaction again, she took notice of you. Her eyes scanned your body until stopping at the mess that she had left between your legs. Wordlessly, she grabbed some paper towels and shoved them into your hands.

“Clean up.”

Jennie demanded before checking herself in the mirror a last time and walking to the door.

Your body automatically straightened up and you almost yelled at her to stop. You had known that this meant nothing to her, but you still didn’t want her to leave; not yet. You wanted to hold her just for a little while longer even if you knew that it was just a lie. But when her eyes met yours, you knew that there was no use in begging. The Jennie that you had known wasn’t there anymore. Once again, she stared at you wordlessly before reaching for the door handle. No apology, no regret; she left as if you were just two strangers that had met by accident.

Tears sprung to your eyes, but this time, you didn’t break down. Your heart had gotten used to the daily torture that Jennie put you through, even if she probably didn’t know about it. She had broken your heart, but she wasn’t to blame for the agony that you were going through ever since. She had lost her way somewhere along the line of your relationship and you should have given up on her. But you had been too stubborn to accept it. You were still hoping until this day that the old Jennie would return eventually. Maybe one day she would remember all the whispered promises that you had told each other under the covers. There was no point in giving up on your hope now.

You had waited so long for her already, you didn’t mind waiting some more.

Just a little longer.

[sorry-i-ship-drarry]

Prompt: 8th Year Fic where Quidditch+ the events of DH have resulted in Ron being really toned and muscular which he flaunts for Hermione at any opportunity (she rolls her eyes but she secretly LOVES it). Draco finds out and in his endless quest to one-up Ron, starts doing GOOFY shit to bulk up. Insanely complicated and ineffective workout routines, repulsive protein shakes etc. Harry can't help but find it oddly adorable

( I absolutely love this request )

8th year , post war .

" Ron you have got to keep your head up high ,you can't afford to miss one goal . It's the first match of the season and losing this would mean our scores would be low all year" harry tells Ron who was brushing off his broom .

" I know harry , I know , you keep your head up high for he snitch , you know malfoy is back in the game and can't deny he's always after you. I've heard he's been working hard this year " Ron nodded .

" hey by the way what's the news over new uniforms , I can't wear the old ones , it would be like my ass on display and we don't want any distractions , right mione ?" Ron smirked . Harry snickered while Hermione rolled her eyes .

" you should keep the blushing to the minimum mione " harry whispered . Hermione hit harry with a book , obviously.

" I'm not sure , I've talked with madame Hooch but I think for the first game you might have to wear the old ones and mione would have to be distracted " harry snickered .

" you're both arseholes " Hermione rolled her eyes ( but she was definitely blushing)

The day of the quidditch match Ron sat down in front of harry in the great hall with Hermione by his side

" this uniform is hideous , couldn't you have had at least tried to get new uniforms " Ron said as he flaunted his arms .

" I think you look great " a girl in their year said . Ron smiled and mumbled a thanks .

" do you think I look good mione ?" Ron smirked at her as he flexed his arms . P

The war and the relentless quidditch practices have made Ron somewhat fitter , muscular and more toned , gone were the days when he was lanky and was clumsy , he had grown confident , strong , organized and definitely without a doubt became unequivocally hotter or so as Hermione thought , not that she'd ever say it out loud .

" you look exactly how you look everyday " Hermione replied sternly

" so good or good ?" Ron joked

" dumb , is what you look Ron " Hermione replied and went back to reading daily prophet

" well girls in the year find me good looking so that's on you mione " Ron winked at Hermione and went back to eating a little before the match , even when he was shit nervous .

During the match , Ron had brilliantly played without missing a single goal , so had harry and surprisingly enough Draco too . Ron was the star of the game and everyone had cheered him on In the quidditch Field and dormitories .

" oh shut up , he looks hot okay " Harry , Hermione and Ron had heard Someone Whisper.

" it doesn't matter , he's out of any one of our leagues , although I think he is hottest of the Weasley's " the same voice whispered. Ron chuckled .

" he looks hot in his uniform " other voice said and harry laughed .

" mione I think people are having crush on Ron "

" really ?" Ron raised his eyebrows as he took of his strappings in front of the mirror . Harry nodded smiling .

" mione , I wouldn't be surprised if one of these days someone tries to kidnap him " Harry jokes

" yeah and why would that be a problem . I'm sure it'd feed his ego " Hermione folded her arms .

" I can't help it , they say I've changed a bit "

" haven't I mione " Ron smirked as he closed the distance between them and winked at her .

It rendered Hermione speechless .

" it's gonna faint her , stop it Ron " Harry laughed . Hermione hit both of them with another book over their heads , blushing furiously.

As for coming days , Ron kept asking Hermione questions like " darn this , even this shirt seems to be too fitted , doesn't it Hermione ?" Or " is it just me or do you feel like these pants are making my thigh's a bit more constrained , right mione ?" Or " I think this shirt looks good on me , doesn't it Hermione " or " Harry do you think mione checked out my arse today " , Ron used to purposely say it out loud for Hermione to listen and as an answer to all , she used to roll her eyes but definitely checked him out any chance she got .

Meanwhile in Slytherin , everything was a chaos

" Draco , I'd date him , he gone fitter , you can't deny it " pansy Groaned as Draco ranted all about how girls and guys both had been crushing over Ron and how he looks better with his stupid red head and his stupid pants and shirt that protruded his body .

" Draco if it bothers you that much , just start working out , show him who's the actual better looking one here " Theodore suggested and Draco Actually noted it but as it turned out Draco working out relentlessly regularly , drinking those disgusted protein shakes didn't do anything to him . He literally used to huff out crying in frustration like a child after every workout .

Nevertheless he kept doing it , which only made him more tired during mornings .

" Harry you've got to stop ogling him " Hermione pointed as Harry was looking over at Draco , who was lazily eating his toast .

" fuck " he heard Draco hiss as he spilled some juice over his shirt . Draco stomped at his table glaring at Ron . Harry chuckled at his reaction .

" he's bloody perfect " Draco whispered to pansy as he glared at Ron .

" he is " pansy agreed lazily . Draco hit her lightly groaning .

" why are even smiling at malfoy " Ron asked Harry .

" what , no I'm not " Harry blushed.

" sure " Hermione sarcastically replied.

Still Harry couldn't stop staring at Draco from table away . Harry hated to admit , he was starting to watch over Draco . He liked watching Draco workout and then cry out on the ground with his legs spread out like a baby or when Draco had grown so lazy that he had become clumsy or when Draco used to just doze off between classes , Harry sort of found it cute but never said it out loud.

The leading evening he was making marks on quidditch Field when he saw Draco sprawled across the ground looking up . Harry went up to him and looked at him upside down . When Draco opened his eyes , he screamed .

" for fucks sake potter " Draco put a hand over his heart as he sat properly.

" not going to cry like a baby today " Harry chuckled .

" ha ha very Funny potter " Draco rolled his eyes as he tried to get up but his legs gave in. Harry immediately wrapped his arm around Draco and helped him up .

" Trying to work hard to win the next game " Harry chuckled

" what- I mean yeah it'd help but In all reality I'm dying right here potter , blind are you " Draco rolled his eyes . Harry helped him to the corner and helped him sit against the fence .

" well I see that everyday , crying like a baby "

" oh shut up would you " Draco rolled his eyes again.

" why are you even doing the whole improper workout ?" Harry asked as he bought water .

" I can ask why are you even here ?" Draco questioned back

" I'm stalking the Slytherin king " Harry sassed

" why wouldn't you " Draco smirked . Harry rolled his eyes

" tell me , why all of this ?" Harry asked

" i-its stupid " Draco sighed

" oh , is there anything more stupid than you , wow " Harry raised his eyebrows.

" ha ha " Draco sassed " i-i just I was just trying to put out the red head Weasley "

" put him out ?" Harry questioned and sat down next to Draco

" he's literally all over , like everywhere he's all I hear about , sickening " Draco scowled

Harry laughed , like loud and Draco should have been annoyed but he wasn't , infact he liked the laugh not that he'd admit.

" why did I even tell you this " Draco groaned at the sudden realisation, burying his face in his hands .

" Ron isn't trying to be famous or anything , he's literally just trying to get Hermione all the time . They're so fucking in love but they never admit and Ron just likes to tease her you know . I think it's all for her anyways " Harry explained . He looks at Draco to his side and bring his hand to Draco's and take them off his face .

" you know what , you are stupid and I can't believe you actually told me this even though I am your so called enemy " Harry smiled facing Draco .

" you're not my enemy, not anymore at least " Draco mumbled . Harry smiled at his innocence . Harry finally gets up .

" for what its worth , it's adorable to see you cry on the field like that and that you're trying to put him out "

" you're cute sometimes Draco specially when you're jealous " Harry smiles and leaves .

Draco blushed uncontrollably .

" you're stupid potter " Draco called out .

" three broomsticks , 7 pm tomorrow , I'll wait" Harry yelled back and ran out of the field .

Guess Draco malfoy just got asked out on a date with his " so called enemy " who by the way now he finds adorable and boy that arse didn't do justice not that Draco didn't already know

[ someone please make a fan art of Draco crying like a baby and Ron and Hermione, please 🥺 ]

[fowlblue]

Ignis Aurum Probat (Part 2)

———————————

(Part 1 can be found here.)

———————————————

He had left the door unlocked, so it took him only a second or two to creep back within the house, shutting the door carefully behind him. The dark, shadowy stretches of space unnerved him- he quickly flicked on the first lamp he could, surveying the rooms before him with a falsified confidence.

This is my house too. I am not an intruder here, he thought, in an attempt to reassure himself. He felt jittery and out-of-touch with the space around him. At least, for tonight. Afterwards, most likely that will change.

It wasn’t a pleasant train of thought.

Forcing his concerns to the back of his mind, Artemis located the kitchen, flicking on the lights and making himself a glass of water. He didn’t bother to keep quiet- at this point, it didn’t matter. He needed them awake.

In seconds, he had downed the glass, taking the time to rinse it out and put it away. The clink of the glass in the sink felt out of place this late at night, but he didn’t bother to disguise the sound.

He thought he heard the sounds of someone awakening upstairs, and the sound of lights being switched on.

Passing through the foyer, Artemis made his way into the den, seating himself comfortably in one of the armchairs. It felt odd- there had been no armchairs on the ship (a necessary sacrifice to make way for equipment, albeit a less-than-comfortable one).

Artemis sighed, loudly, focusing on his breathing the way Butler had taught him. The upcoming meeting was no doubt going to be distinctly unpleasant (he could feel a familiar frustration knotting itself within his chest, desperate to be released). Nevertheless, it was unavoidable- it would need to be had now or later, and later would only complicate matters. Complication was hardly something he could afford at the moment.

It only took a few seconds for his Mother and Father to descend into the foyer- in seconds, they were both standing at the entrance to the room, both half-asleep and completely bewildered by the sight of their son.

“Hello, Father. Mother.”

Artemis’s tone was overly formal, cold and distant in a way it hadn’t been since the recovery of his memories post-mind wipe. He made no attempt to soften it, as he was not here to exchange words or pleasantries with his parents.

Artemis Fowl was here to give warning.

Before either could speak, Artemis raised his hand, cutting both off before a word could leave their mouths. His face contorted in an ever-so-slight snarl- his fury was beginning to shine through, and he let it. “Don’t say anything, either of you. I’m not here to bandy words back and forth, nor am I here to listen to whatever reasons you two decide to excuse your actions with. I’m done with that.”

Their faces slackened in surprise at the sudden vitriol in his voice.

“No.”, Artemis continued. “Tonight, you are going to listen, without interruptions. If you have anything to say, feel free to air it to the empty room after I have left- I have no wish to hear either of you speak, right now. The time for negotiation has long since passed.”

He steepled his fingers in front of his face, his eyes narrowing. The next words had been well-rehearsed, though he found himself speaking with less emotion than his original attempts- he felt like he had stepped into frozen water, the chill slowly eating its way through him until it had numbed him. He imagined that would not be the case later, but for now, he accepted it- it made the words that followed easier, somewhat. More detached.

“I am taking custody of the twins.”

Immediately, his parents stiffened. His father’s voice reminded him of a gunshot.

“What in the-“

“Be quiet.”

Artemis’s growl cut through the air, drowning out his father’s protest. He raised his hand again for silence, his lip still curled into a slight snarl. “I said I didn’t want to hear you, and I meant it. I’m not going to give you the chance to guilt me or intimidate me in the way you did to my brothers- I know better than to listen to you, now. So be quiet, because I am not going to repeat myself.”

Fowl Sr.’s hands curled into fists at his side, but he did not speak. Artemis took that as acceptance, and continued.

“The twins are both currently with Butler. I will be taking them with me, and I will be caring for them for the foreseeable future. As I���ve stated, I will be taking custody of them.”

His voice darkened.

“I refuse to explain to you why- I have tried to make you see reason many, many times, and each time I find myself disappointed. So tonight, I won’t bother. If you can’t see what’s wrong with what you’ve done, that’s your own shortsightedness, not mine.

If you attempt to stop me, rest assured that you will fail. I am perfectly willing to take this the legal route- and I would win in court, as you know. Should you attempt again, or in any sort of violent manner, and I will instead seek help underground. I have informed Commodore Holly about your behavior, and while I’m sure she doesn’t want to be involved, she’s as appalled as I am. I doubt you want to risk upsetting her, seeing as part of your ridiculous argument is centered so heavily around the fairy folk’s ‘interference’ in our lives. Hardly very grateful, but again, that is your issue.”

As he spoke, Artemis felt the knot of anger that had been curled in his chest ever since that one call from Beckett unravel, if only slightly. It didn’t abate his fury in the slightest (he doubted anything ever would), but in some sense, it felt like relief. Like he had lived his life with poison festering inside him, and now he was free to let it slowly drain away.

“I will be returning soon to collect the twins’ things. If I find any harm has come to their property, the aforementioned ‘legal route’ will become the only route. I have covered my tracks well, but I doubt our ‘family name’ will help you much in court.”

Artemis took a second to pause for breath, surveying their reactions with the same cool-eyed stare he had usually reserved for enemies. An expression completely unemotional, as not to give anything away.

“I made a promise to my brothers that I would protect them. I uttered it the first day I met them, and I’ve repeated it every day since. I am fulfilling that promise now. I am their older brother, and the fact that it has come to this is partially on me. I shouldn’t have trusted you with their care, because at the end of the day, I was also raised by you, and the effects of your negligence still affect me to this day: it has taken me a long time to realize that.

I do not know when you will see them again- it depends on what the twins want, alongside what my reason demands. Were I simply to follow my heart, the answer would be never, but I understand that is not always the healthiest option. For now, I think it’s best you limit your contact to me, and I strongly recommend you keep it minimal. Are we clear?”

His parents stood, shocked by his overly-formal statement of warning. Artemis felt a brief pang of guilt at the horror on his mother’s face- he did not know if she had been involved in the lockdown. But the fact was, she hadn’t protected the twins, time and time again, and that made her almost irresponsible as Father.

Let me be a monster, then., he thought grimly. I know I am right.

He stood. “I’ll see myself out.”

——————————————

When he returned to the boat, both Myles and Beckett had piled themselves together on one of the seats, each looking uncharacteristically (though understandably) glum. Beckett visibly brightened when he saw his brother stoop through the low entryway, though Myles only gave him a dismissive glance, turning his anxious gaze back to the opposite window.

“I’m back.”, he announced, loud enough for Butler to hear from the helm. After a few seconds, the boat tumbled to life.

Artemis picked his way through the twins’ scattered belongings, eventually settling on a seat adjacent to them. Beckett immediately scrambled over, eager to pile back onto his brother- in seconds, Artemis felt the ever-excitable twin curl up against his side. The contact was warm and Artemis felt some of the hollow feeling in the pit of his stomach lessen. Myles turned to face him, though he kept his distance. His glasses were slightly crooked.

“Well?”, he snapped. “You said you would explain this nightmare.”

Artemis nodded, heaving a sigh. “I suppose I did, didn’t I?”

Beckett shifted against his side. “You totally did.” He chirped. “Which is good, cause I’m pretty confused-“

“As am I!”, Myles agreed, his tone slightly bordering on the hysterical.

“Okay then.”, Artemis nodded, reaching into one of the bags he himself had brought, quickly finding what he needed. He tossed the pack of gummy worms to Myles.

“Here, I brought these for you. Eat while I talk, you’re getting anxious.”

Myles likely would have disagreed, if he hadn’t already been furiously devouring the sugary snack. Artemis mentally reminded himself to fetch more at the first opportunity- Myles liked them, and they helped soothe his anxiety, which was something that would most likely be very important in the upcoming days.

“I’ll preface this by saying that none of what has happened tonight is either of your faults, in any way.”

Both twins paused- Artemis’s tone had lost its jovial tone, now all seriousness. In fact, he almost sounded a little sad.

“Mother and Father are… no longer responsible for you, as of right now. I am.”

Beckett turned to look up at Artemis, confusion swimming in his gaze. “What’s that supposed to mean?”, he mumbled. Artemis patted him lightly on the head.

“To put it as simply as I can, Mother and Father weren’t taking very good care of you. They were never spending time with you, or keeping an eye on you, and always yelling at you when they were angry- that makes them negligent. When Father decided to yell at you both, scare you, and isolate you from everyone else, and then ignore you as a form of punishment, he was being… a bully, to put it mildly. That’s not how parents should behave, so I'm stepping in for a little while. Maybe a long while, if they refuse to change. Does that make sense to you?”

Beckett deliberated the question for a moment, his face screwed in a look of intense concentration. “I guess.”, he eventually decided.

Artemis’s expression softened at that. “Well, I suppose that’s good.”, he said with a small laugh. His gaze flickered upwards to the other twin, currently seated across from him, absentmindedly picking at the seat underneath him. “Myles, did that make sense to you?”

“Of course it did.”, the younger boy hissed, his expression immediately becoming defensive. “I’m not stupid.”

Artemis detected a note of fear in his brother’s voice- his heart broke a little more.

“You’re not stupid, Myles. Neither of you are.”

The younger twin didn’t respond for several seconds, his stony expression unreadable. Then, when he spoke again, his voice broke.

“Why…”, Myles stammered, curling in on himself slightly. He looked significantly more distressed now. “Why did he yell at us? It’s not like we meant to get the jet blown up- how were we supposed to know someone would attack us-“

“Myles....”

The genius twin glanced upwards, his expression distraught.

Artemis had already crossed the narrow aisle, seating himself besides Myles. He didn’t touch him- his younger brother was much like himself in that he didn’t like sudden, overwhelming contact. Instead, Artemis let Beckett race past him, the blonde boy immediately placing himself next to his twin. Artemis noticed him bump against the side of Myles’ hand with his own- a unique form of high five.

“Myles,”, Artemis repeated, waiting until the boy’s eyes were on him to continue. “It’s not your fault. It’s not your fault at all. You shouldn’t have taken the jet, yes, but Father’s reaction was extremely out of line, and you didn’t deserve to be treated like that. You never deserve to be treated like that.”

“But… I should have known better, I’m a genius-“

“No.”, Artemis shook his head. “It’s still never okay. Even if you’re a genius. Father made you upset because he couldn’t handle his temper- that’s his fault in every way. Not yours at all, okay?”

Myles didn’t answer, though Artemis noted that he was no longer hunched over. That was a good sign.

“Myles, Beck, listen to me.”

Both turned to him- Myles looked significantly calmer now, though both still looked slightly distressed. Artemis couldn’t blame them- this entire night had been a rollercoaster.

“Remember what I promised you two earlier? It’s going to be okay. We’ll be okay. That was a promise, alright? I don’t break my promises.”

Neither looked wholly convinced. However, much to Artemis’s surprise, Myles eventually leaned over, so that his head was resting against Artemis’s arm. “Against my better judgement,” he mumbled, his voice muffled by Artemis’s sleeve, “I believe you.”

Beckett swiftly took the opportunity to clamber over his brother, firmly nestling himself against Artemis’s other side. Artemis lifted his arm, and soon Beckett was completely snuggled up against him. The blonde twin rarely missed out on a chance to be clinging to someone- normally, Artemis would have found this overwhelming, but after such a night he found it was the most wonderful feeling in the world.

In all honesty, he had no idea what was going to become of this. He still needed to inform Holly about his whereabouts (he had asked her to keep an ear out, in case the meeting had taken a turn for the worse), and he still needed to plan to retrieve the twins’ belongings from the Villa. Nevertheless, Artemis Fowl was certain that this was the right thing to do- he could only hope that the future was a little brighter, after this.

Whatever may come, my brothers, I will continue to protect you. That will always be a promise.

[palmett-hoes]

this was originally meant to be a response/follow-up to @i-did 's post about race in the aftg fandom (that you should read). i ran it by him first and asked permission to add, but then we decided it was too long so i should make it its own post

---

i want to talk about fandom's take on the twins' race because it's rather glaring in the fandom that andrew (and then aaron by necessity) are often portrayed as the only white characters on the team and i have to question why?

there's nothing in the backstories that would mean writing them as POC would fling them headlong into offensive stereotypes that the fandom hasn't bypassed over to make another fox a POC.

they have a history of addiction? but it's okay for matt and seth to be addicts and be brown.

they're violent? but it's okay for renee to be non-white and a former gang member.

they're blond and 'pale'¹? but allison can be a WOC and bleach her hair without saying it explicitly? renee can have white rainbow hair no matter the AU? neil can be a blue-eyed redhead and still be drawn darker skinned half the time?

'pale' in and of itself is a very vague word that's only brought up in the context of comparison to notably dark skinned nicky. it's completely relative, and multi-racial families where people look wildly different from each other exist (pretty commonly). or if you're prescriptivist how about the multiple ways a POC can still be a natural blond including but not limited to pigmentation conditions or being mixed race? similarly, i think less than a quarter of the FCs i've seen for andrew over the years have been natural blonds themselves.

so if our holdups aren't about racial stereotyping and they aren't about the incredibly vague character descriptions, then why are the twins always white when it's approached as a good thing that no one else is? when i've seen multiple different posts lauding the fandom for adding diversity where nora didn't write it, except for here?

.

to be completely, bluntly honest, it's because we as a majority-white fandom are uncomfortable when we are not the central characters. or maybe we are uncomfortable when people of color ARE the central characters. i don't think there's much of a difference.

we are comfortable writing and drawing nicky, the upperclassmen, then kevin (in that order) as poc because, simply, we use them as background characters. they are rarely the main characters of fics, or have their own storylines in them; it all revolves around andreil.

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additionally, while i've used neil up to now as an example of the fandom being OKAY with writing POC, let's also admit that it's an,, imperfect representation, as he will often be racially ambiguous with no explicit ethnicity, he will be the lightest skinned of the foxes of color, and he will still have eurocentric features. also it's genuinely a toss up as to whether he's drawn brown or not, there are still plenty of white neils, much more than there are white dans and matts and renees (not an attack on anyone who draws white neils, simply a statement) and FCs and edits of him still tend to be white people.

he's a bit of a schrödinger's person of color, not really any one thing or another, very few people being willing to take a hard stance on him and do the work of taking that decision under consideration when writing and drawing him.

(quick shout-out here to @hi-raethia for making content about an explicitly chinese interpretation of neil).

(additionally, to be as clear about my intended message as possible, this isn't a statement on the politics of passing or undermining the ethnicities of lightskinned poc, this is about a lack of detail being put into making a character a character of color in any thoughtful, meaningful, or significant way)

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so when i talk about the centralization of white people in fandom, neil gets to be included, perhaps with a footnote indicating that this is somewhat of a more complicated statement than it is with lily-white andrew minyard.

nevertheless, i feel comfortable saying that 75% of fandom content revolves around andrew and neil, major exceptions only being jerejean which are often stand-alone from the foxes, and the rising branch of kevaaron shippers. however both of those ships are actually subject to this exact same criticism, as ships between a a flat-out white character and a dubiously "non-white" character who can also be white sometimes. it varies.

conspicuously, content about the UPPERCLASSMEN tends to revolve around andrew and neil.

fics where the upperclassmen are the pov character are often outside-perspective fics on andreil.

HC posts about the upperclassmen, especially matt, will devote major portions to his time spent helping, hanging with, and thinking about andrew and/or neil.

secondary ships like danmatt or renison tend to be just that, secondary ships moving in the background of andreil-focused works. they get more of a,,, scenic shout-out than a storyline

it is only comfortable for us to write these characters as characters of color if they revolve entirely around white characters

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so after all that? what should we do, as a white-majority fandom? what should YOU, specifically, as a white person, do?

i hate to talk about a problem without also talking about solutions, and i try not to carp on something i don't want to be an active part of fixing. public criticism without an action plan only leads to hurt feelings and guilt, and that's never my intention when bringing this up. my goal is to address a general problem, not anyone specific's personal failings.

in all honesty leaning completely into all of the foxes being people of color, though i think neat and i certainly support, is not the best solution, and would be more of a hollow action than anything else without addressing the underlying problems that lead to the development of this dynamic.

i think the best thing to do would be to 1. do some research on writing poc, usually by following some writing-specific blogs like @writingwithcolor or @pocinmymedia . look up the 'black best friend' trope and really spend some time tjinking about it. spend an hour seeking out a random assortment of blogs that interest you that are also run by people of color. checking through tags like drawingwhileblack or blacktober may be good kickoff points.

tumblr is great because with an hour of active work to find these blogs, you can then go months passively seeing content from them. try not to interact, actually, simply watch and listen and become familiar with general trends and concerns in different communities. remember that every blog is run by an individual person, not an elected representative of their race, and always keep this in mind.

you are teaching YOURSELF that people of color are individuals, they have interests and inner lives that don't revolve around whiteness, that don't revolve around YOU

at the same time, 2. challenge yourself as a creator to make more content about the upperclassmen, specifically. make art about them doing stuff as a group separate from neil and andrew's group. find a compilation of 'draw the squad' memes and draw/tag the upperclassmen only. make jokes where they talk to each other. write some meta about their character motivations. write a fic where andreil isn't even mentioned, it can be super short, you can even use a prompt generator.

as a reader, reread their backstories in the extra content. reread son nefes. use ao3's filtering system to read some fics about JUST the upperclassmen, few and far apart though they may be.

if we've decided that the upperclassmen are people of color then lean into that, and learn to CARE about them on their own merit, because they are the most underutilized characters in the fandom. we need to make content centralized around them to combat the fact that fandom centralizes whiteness

[protecticarus]

Hi! I just wanted to say that I love your fics, they’re absolutely amazing. Anyway... bit of an odd request but can I get an angsty fic where Dirk realizes he’s in love with Todd? (and proceeds to do nothing about it) The amount that I kin Dirk might be a little concerning, and the amount that I associate my best friend of four years with Todd (and they agree) might be a bit concerning. Especially since I just figured out... whoops, I’m in love with them! (and let me tell you it HURTS) I’m almost 100% sure feel the same they’re just not at an emotionally stable point for me to tell them. (you know, much like Todd) So I know it seems a bit silly and weird, but I think it might help me cope a bit to see Dirk in a similar situation, feel less alone

hi anon! i’m sorry you’re stuck in such a complicated situation. i hope it all works out in the end. i can definitely relate to dealing with things by reading about a similar experiences and relating to fictional characters a little too hard. just remember that what you’re feeling is valid and no pain is permanent. x

i hope this does the trick!

~

The tv screen flickered between a diverse selection of images, the sound cutting off well before a full phrase could be heard.

“I regret the day I taught you how to use the remote.” Todd told his friend from the kitchen.

“What on earth for?” Dirk absent-mindedly replied while switching the channel, yet again. He had already kicked off his shoes and was now comfortably lounging on Todd’s couch.

Todd rolled his eyes. “Definitely not because you switch the channel about 187 times a minute.” He replied.

Dirk scoffed. “Poppycock.”

“God, you’re so British.” Todd murmured. “Just pick a channel, Dirk.” He added, louder.

“Fine!” Dirk said and lifted his finger off the button. “There’s some sort of apocalypse film on, we can watch that?” He added after he registered the image of a large fire on the screen.

Todd poked his head out of the kitchen long enough to see the screen. “Hate to break it to you, Dirk, but that’s the news.” He said.

Dirk’s eyes widened. “Bloody hell!” He exclaimed.

“Yeah, the world’s going to shit. Pick something else.” Todd told him.

“You just told me to stop changing the ch-“

“Just pick something other than the news, Dirk, Jesus.” Todd interrupted.

Finally after a few more channel jumps, Dirk settled on a rerun episode of Friends.

Soon, Todd sat down next to him on the couch and handed him a cup. “Here.”

Dirk furrowed his brows. “What’s this?” He asked.

“Your tea.” Todd said, already focusing on the tv.

“You made me tea?” Dirk asked.

“Yeah, you usually drink tea at this time of day, right?” Todd replied, his eyes never leaving the screen.

“Y-Yes, I suppose I do.” Dirk replied. He had no idea that Todd had taken notice of his tea drinking habits. “What kind of tea is it?” Dirk asked.

Todd scoffed. “That one- you know, your favorite one.” He replied.

Dirk lifted the cup to his face and sniffed. It was indeed his favorite tea. “You know what my favorite tea is?”

Todd finally turned to look at him, with an amused expression on his face. “Yeah, of course. You drink it all the time.” He said and turned back towards the tv.

Dirk just turned to stare into his tea. “Thank you.” He said quietly.

“Sure.” Mumbled Todd, like it was no big deal.

But it was to Dirk.

The only time another person had made Dirk tea was when he ordered it from a barista in a coffee shop. And then he had to specifically instruct them to make it the way he liked it. But here was Todd, knowing this about Dirk, just by paying attention. By caring enough to take notice.

Dirk lifted the cup to his lips in an attempt to hide his growing smile. Todd had made him tea.

As Dirk took his first sip of the tea, he turned his eyes toward Todd, who was still watching the tv. The tea was a little weaker than Dirk himself made it and still a little too hot to really enjoy but... It was made by Todd. For Dirk.

Despite all his claims of being an asshole, Todd’s affection for those he cared about was clear as day in the little things he did. It was one of the reasons Dirk loved him.

Dirk spit some of his tea back into the cup, shocked by his own train of thought. Todd turned to look at him.

“Ew.” Said Todd. “Is it bad?” He asked.

“No! No, not at all.” Dirk hurried to reply. “Just hot.” He added.

“Oh, okay. Let it cool down.” Todd said and turned back toward the tv.

“Good idea.” Dirk said, his attention already far away from the conversation.

Obviously by ‘one of the reasons he loved Todd’ Dirk had meant ‘one of the things he loved about Todd.’ There was a clear distinction between the two. You can love things about a person without loving the person.

As soon he’d tried to tell himself this, Dirk knew the truth. He loved Todd. And not just that, oh no. He loved Amanda and Farah, sure. But he loved Todd. He was in love with Todd.

Dirk felt the sudden urge to list all the swear words he knew - which would be an extensive list - but he decided against it, as he didn’t feel like explaining this course of action to Todd.

Dirk felt dumb. How could he not have realized this before now? Clearly it was not a new development. He felt the exact same way about Todd that he had prior to this day. The same way he had felt about him for a while. Only now he knew what it was.

He would have liked to pretend he was mistaken, chalk it up to not having previous experience with being in love, but Dirk knew better. If you’d asked him a year ago what being in love felt like, he’d have shrugged his shoulders and replied with something along the lines of ‘I haven’t the slightest clue!’ and go on about his day.

But now? He knew exactly what that particular emotion was.

It was the warm tidal wave in his stomach whenever Todd laughed at something he said. It was the sudden burning in his cheeks when Todd touched him. It was the rib-cracking pain when Todd was hurt or in danger. It was the ineffable pull he felt coming from Todd, constantly begging for Dirk to come just a little bit closer.

Dirk had never given much thought to the popular idea that when you’re in love, you just know. It was incredibly cheesy. Yet, as it turns out, surprisingly accurate.

Dirk fought the urge to groan out loud. This had not been part of his plan. The plan was: befriend Todd, start a detective agency with Todd and work with Todd. That was it. Much like the little girl with the red cape from that morbid children’s story Todd had told him about, Dirk had strayed far from the assigned path.

In so many ways, Dirk was eccentric. He had never fit any ready-made mold, he had never fit any stereotype. And now here he was. In love with his best friend. What a cliché.

Dirk’s bitter musings were suddenly interrupted by a loud laugh coming from the man next to him. Dirk turned his attention to Todd, who seemed to be thoroughly amused by a woman with a turkey on her head dancing on the tv screen.

Todd’s laugh was like music to Dirk’s ears. His stupid, predictable ears.

Dirk too tried to focus on the screen rather than Todd’s side profile, only to witness the turkey-headed woman’s shock at her companion telling her he loved her by accident. It was clearly the first time she heard this confession and the man immediately tried to backtrack and deny ever having said those three words in the first place. Nevertheless, she seemed elated at this revelation. She kept repeating ‘you love me, you love me’ excitedly.

Dirk turned his attention back to the object of his affection. For a moment he imagined what Todd’s reaction would be to hearing those words from Dirk.

He’d like to imagine that Todd would react somewhat similarly to how the woman had on the show. Surprised, but overtly happy. Dirk’s eyes suddenly felt incredibly warm. He turned his gaze at the ceiling, hoping to will the tears not to leave his eyes.

He knew his feelings would not be greeted with overt happiness. A small part of him dared to believe that Todd wouldn’t be utterly disgusted by Dirk’s feelings for him. An even smaller part of him almost sort of entertained the idea that Todd might reciprocate. But Dirk also knew that even if those things would somehow be true, they would not change the outcome.

Todd was a mess. A mess Dirk loved dearly, but a mess nonetheless. Todd still believed himself to be an asshole, tightly wound in a web of self-hatred. Amanda was still giving him the silent treatment. He had yet to come clean with his parents about the lie he’d been living. He was still getting used to said lie actually becoming reality, one pararibulitis attack at a time. His apartment still showed signs of the Rowdies’ visit all those months ago, a fact that wouldn’t get taken care of until they started making more steady money at the agency. And then there was the agency. It was up and running, but still in its early stages, still finding its legs.

No matter how he might feel, Todd was in no place to hear that his best friend was in love with him. Dirk was one of the only stable pieces of the crooked Jenga tower that was Todd’s life. Dirk didn’t dare to think what would happen if he were to compromise that structural piece. It wouldn’t be fair to Todd. He needed a friend right now.

Dirk felt like in the span of about five minutes, everything he knew had been turned upside down, yet he ended up in the same place he started at. Turns out he was in love with Todd, but this would and could not affect his actions in any way.

Dirk felt a new flavor of sadness settle on his tongue. He loved Todd, but Todd could not know. Dirk loved him, but it could not be acknowledged outside of his own head.

Suddenly Dirk felt like he might burst with the way deep longing clawed at his chest.

But as he watched Todd, smiling and comfortable on the couch next to Dirk, he decided this was a good thing, not a bad one.

Dirk might have to prioritize being Todd’s friend over his less than platonic feelings for him, but he was more than willing to do that. For Todd.

Love, in all its forms, was a good thing. And Dirk had a lot of it. He might not be able to put it into words, but much like Todd himself, Dirk could let it bleed into the things he did. He could be there for Todd, and love him, without saying so. He could love Todd, even if he never said so.

After all, Todd deserved to be loved, even if he didn’t know it yet. But Dirk would make sure that he would know. Eventually.

“Dirk, drink your tea before it gets cold, I’m not getting up to make you a new one.” Todd said suddenly.

Dirk smiled and raised his cup to his lips again.

~

if you have any ideas for fics, send me prompts! my inbox is always open! xx