#thread:alec&eli

[blindspct]

alec felt bad to have even mentioned ending things with the other, especially since that wasn't at all what he wanted. he wanted to be with the other. eli was the first person who had made him feel anything and he really wished he didn't have to go. he didn't want to make any rash decisions though and instead, he was going to see how the two of them made his work before he considered giving up travel nursing. he returned the kiss, his hand resting on his cheek. "that makes two of us." but he knew that they could overcome the distance either way. he allowed the other to take his hands and chuckled, his bottom lip coming between his teeth. "mm, i guess it depends baby. what do you have in mind?"

eli leaned into his touch, smiling softly the more alec spoke. the thought was too tempting. the idea of just packing up and going, following his heart. he almost found himself saying yes, that he'd be packed and ready by tonight. his lips even parted with the words on them but he stopped himself. thinking about his parents and siblings and his friends. he couldn't just leave them. especially not when he was in the middle of such a big project at work. "it's not insane because i really wish i could," he admitted and leaned forward to press a kiss to his lips. "i am worth it, huh?" he teased and reached out for his hands. "and so are you. just in case that wasn't obvious.but the bigger question is how are we going to make the most of your last night, hm?"

[blindspct]

alec laughed at the other's words, "i won't or well, i don't know. i'll try not to." he was bad at that, especially when he knew he wasn't going to stay long. he pushed his fingers through the other's hair and took a deep breath, "i wish you could just come with me. i know that's...insane but i hate leaving you behind like this. i know the visit will be worth it though. you're worth it."

"i would love that," eli said without hesitation. already picturing it in his mind. "but you have to promise you won't live out of boxes forever until i come visit. you gotta decorate and plan it out and make it your own and everything," he told him, brushing his fingers through his hair for a moment. "i want you to have fun over there, even if you'll be missing my handsome face," he added with a wink.

[blindspct]

alec laughed. that was one of the many things that he loved about the man. it was why he was thankful the other wasn't ready to let him go. it'd been so long since he'd been this connected with anyone and he was willing to put in the work if the other was. "i like that idea. those are things we won't expect all the time and i think it'll be nice." he smiled and leaned into eli's touch. "i'll be honest with you from here on out. maybe when i get settled in my next place, you could come visit. we could be tourist together." he suggested.

"yeah, yeah i guess we will. i mean i'll try not to go too crazy with it but you know i love a color coded excel sheet. though i don't think that comes across as sexy in terms of planning out phone calls," he admitted, his cheeks slightly flush at the suggestion. "i'm not an expert at long distance either. i think we both just have to be willing, you know? we could make it more romantic, mail each other letters. very old school," he added. now that it was clear they weren't about to break up, eli felt more comfortable reaching up to brush his fingers along alec's cheek, eventually reaching in to kiss him softly. "guess we also can't be afraid to be honest with each other either."

[blindspct]

he had a fair point. this wasn't really the way he expected the conversation to go either but he didn't know that the other would really want to do long distance. alec assumed that things would be easier if he cut things off. that didn't seem to be what the other wanted though and at the end of the day, he didn't either. eyes met his, "okay." he breathed out, hand reaching out for the other's. "no, i'm not going to a different planet. i just, i didn't know i meant that much to you." his hand squeezed gently, "but i want this as long as you do. i'm willing to make this work. i want this to work."

"i mean don't act surprised i asked the question, alec. there's a lot of ways this conversation could have gone and you just telling me you're leaving and it's over is not the one i had in mind." he let out a long breath. eli wasn't naive. he knew this moment would come, he just thought they would talk about it more seriously instead of thinking of what they had as momentary fling to leave behind. he stepped forward, almost taking his hand but deciding not to. "then don't leave me behind. i mean you're not going to another planet, are you?" eli hated to feel like he was begging and it caused him to step back again, the emotions mixing up too much for him. "but i don't want you to just do it because you feel like you have to. i want you to want it too."