#wait did i just thèse-antithèse-synthèse this post lol

[bluemoon-golden]

"pangi is bad at commitment this" "pangi is great at commitment that" it's both! It's both okay!

Pangi sucks at commitment but he is great at committing.

Pangi couldn't tell Mocha he loved him. He couldn't daydream with him about the life they'd have if they ran away. But he showed up. He sat in the potion room day after day, emptying bottles and listening to Mocha despairing about how hard alchemy leveling was, and just enjoying Mocha's company. He knew Clown would kill Mocha but he still went with him all but holding his hand to the arena. He witnessed Mocha's death and he mourned him and he carried his pain and anger until Ace allowed him to release it.

Pangi didn't make big promises to Aimsey or Ros after the Null, though he did say he'd protect them, and now he would drop everything in a second if they needed him. He saw Aimsey's thinking room and dragged them there and asked about it. He is prone to anger and fighting but he would never really attack either of them no matter how upset he gets. He would never really do anything to hurt them deeply and would rather disappear from their lives than face their hatred (as shown in the disagreements they had in the past - he just assumed they wouldn't want to see him again and tried to make his peace with it rather than go for revenge and betrayal)

He joined green as a way to try and balance the forces, almost as a joke. But did you know he was the first to join green? Did you know bad was the first to notice Pangi is a pangolin? Have you heard him the last 500 times he said that?? Do you think he spent literal hours removing water from the cathedral because he isn't committed to his faction???

Pangi won't seriously ask Lukey to marry him (or even just to date him) but he will build statues and underground rooms because lukey asked. He will flirt like his life depends on it at the first occasion just because he can, because lukey will flirt back, because lukey will laugh. he will throw I love yous when he is upset or annoyed, and jokes about tormenting lukey for the rest of his life but won't say those things seriously.

Pangi says he is bad at commitment because he thinks no one would seriously commit to him, and so he doesn't vocalise his commitment, he doesn't do promises of forever that could be broken. because it's easier not saying anything than risk being rejected. and then he turns around and dedicates everything he is to others. this is how he loves and he doesn't even know it because admitting it would be too scary and vulnerable!