#we got a yapperr

[coldwetdirty]

man do i wish my insomnia was at least productive. all i do is sit on tumblr and fail at school

[coldwetdirty]

once again in instagram jail for the crime of talking about my inability yet desire to love. thanks for not letting me post cringe i guess

[coldwetdirty]

today i found out that spirit halloween jtk mask is $40. anyway mine is hanging in my closet 2 jumpscare me when i open it n forget it's there

[coldwetdirty]

defending my little sister from my father's assholery vs her turning around n provoking him like oh god why do you have so much beef with a 15 year old vs oh god you're 15 traumatized and your role models were your immature parents and Me

[coldwetdirty]

some ppl don't understand what it's like to grow up ugly and by god i will never be ugly again

[coldwetdirty]

a week without shitposting has left me so pent up. when i was in kindergarten/1st/2nd grade ish my teachers would tell my mom they were concerned about how meek i was. always getting picked on never first to anything blah blah blah. i never really cared i was just sad other kids were mean to me.

i don't know what changed or when it happened but now i'm still quiet and still am never first to anything but now i'm so angry all the time and the resentment towards everybody who has pushed me around and the people i continue to let do so because i don't want to be alone again continues to build and build and build and i don't know what to do with it. there is so much i want to say and so much i want to do and yet when it comes down to it i'm still that exact same kid and i'm still angry at those kids for picking on me and i know that i will never be able to do anything to get even and that makes it so much worse. my mom said she wanted to take me to see a psychologist when i was around 6-8 to try n figure out what was going on with me because that's when it started to get bad and it never happened and i really wonder what my life would've been like had that happened. i don't have the means to talk to anybody now and frankly even if i did i don't really want to. i'm comfortable stewing in this rapidly boiling pot of bitterness trying to dissolve the vile parts of me like cyanide in soup 👍

[coldwetdirty]

i talk a lot about the infinite amount of animosity resentment and other ugly feelings i have towards my parents but i have 2 give them kudos for thugging raising me and my sister  out i cannot phathom doing anything every day for weeks much less so many years especially dealing with two little assholes you have no choice but to deal with. god damn

[coldwetdirty]

i sense my instagram poofing again soon so. hi guys. hopefully i don't go to tumblr jail too

[coldwetdirty]

i post what i want and i'm downright evil and ugly inside if you don't like me you're wrong die and go to hell.