#we technically don't know EXACTLY why she chose him but that doesn't matter with this. She still chose him.

[dootznbootz]

I'm happy that the "Helen is of Sparta, not Troy" post is getting seen and people are giving love to her as they should but I'm getting a wee bit frustrated by the Menelaus inclusion with the whole "She was a possession to others and never had a choice".

Yes, Helen is a victim of fate and multiple horrible circumstances. She gets kidnapped by Theseus and Paris. So much blame is being put on her when she really isn't at fault and doesn't have much choice.

A choice she made though? WAS MENELAUS!

The Oath of Tyndareus was all about how "If you want to have a chance of marrying her, you have to swear to respect her and her choice and defend their marriage if it's needed".

If anything, Menelaus was her "prize"! Not the other way around!!! And they are clearly shown caring for one another!!! uyfuygluhyutfugy

[lightandfellowship]

An aspect of Hoder's death that I find pretty compelling outside of just the effect her death had on the cast + the events of the game is the fact that her brother and friends seem to just be guessing at what she would have wanted or what she would have done in their shoes. And quite possibly guessing incorrectly. Which highlights one of the many tragic elements of death apart from the death itself: the dead not being able to speak for themselves.

Vidar turns to Kingdom Hearts because it might save Hoder's brother and he thinks that's what she would want. After all, her brother is someone precious to her who she's willing to protect with her life, as she demonstrated in Enchanted Dominion when she sacrificed herself to save him. But saving her brother via Kingdom Hearts means potentially harming the worlds, their residents, and the entire universe in general, and considering Hoder chose to confront a super powerful fairy all by herself to try and save Aurora, a random stranger she had only just met, endangering innocents for personal reasons sounds like the kind of thing she might seriously disapprove of. But it seems like Vidar, Vala, and Vali never considered that possibility, assuming that it was just a given that Hoder would risk the entire world for her brother.

And while Baldr's motivations are kinda complex and can be interpreted in a number of ways, it wouldn't susprise me if part of the reason why he wanted to purge the world and kill the upperclassmen was for the sake of getting revenge on Hoder's behalf. We know he blames the upperclassmen for not saving her, and it was the evil of the world that drew Hoder to the castle and got her killed in the first place. (There's also the element of "Baldr blames himself for her death but he can't handle the guilt so he's going to blame everyone else instead as a coping mechanism.") Once again, someone close to Hoder is risking the lives of countless others for her sake, ostensibly (though I'm sure Baldr is just telling himself that he's doing it for her when really he's mostly doing it for himself, unleashing his grief and wrath upon the world that wronged him.) And it's not just strangers at risk this time, her friends are getting killed one by one, all because her brother thought they deserved it for failing to save her. I don't think it's a stretch to say that Hoder didn't blame her friends at all for what happened to her and had no interest in getting "revenge" on them.

What makes Hoder's situation interesting/unique though is that she technically does get several opportunities to speak for herself after she dies, unlike most characters who die suddenly and prematurely. Once in the Underworld after her spirit gets temporarily brought back to meet with Xehanort and Eraqus, and several times after that when she's hiding in Xehanort's heart. But for most of these scenes she chooses not to speak, and when she does finally reveal herself and speak, it's during a scene where all of her dialog was potentially just a ruse to get closer to Baldr in order to take him out, and thus it's hard to say exactly how genuine her words were. Even when given the rare and precious opportunity to express her true feelings and desires post-death, she remains quiet, or chooses to speak but potentially with ulterior motives. Which actually fits how she acted in life as well. So maybe dying was never the problem, maybe part of her tragedy is that she never would have made her feelings clear even if she were alive. Which I think is a pretty interesting character trait for her, a character who values actions over words, a character who doesn't seem to be too concerned about explaining herself or being understood by others, a character who would rather just take matters into her own hands instead of clarifying her wishes to others who could act on her behalf...and the tragic accidents + miscommunication that occurs because of those secretive, proactive, and independent aspects of her personality.

Anyway, I have to imagine she kinda resents seeing her loved ones do these really terrible things in her name. Especially since she probably thought that her sacrifice was going to be the only one, no blood on her hands except for her own, only for that death to cause ten others. And as I've seen other people speculate, this probably contributed to her choice at the end to intervene. All of this tragedy happened because of her, because of her reckless actions and because of her friends and brother's love for her, and she needed to take responsibility for it.

"Dying was the worst decision I ever made." <- Hoder, probably

[acourtofthought]

My love! I have something in my mind. I like Elain as a character, I wouldn't say I love her we don't know much about her for me to say i love her.

yet a couple of things bothered me when speaking about Elain. One of them is the flower thing. I will not bring up the neglect of Feyre because that's on another point. But the fact that people say she could've planted crops and not flowers. While this is a valid point, I seem to recall the one who brought Elain the flower seeds.. was Feyre.. so if we're going to say "Elain should've planted crops" shouldn't we say Feyre should've bought her crops?

The second thing is more for the neglect to care for Feyre as the youngest, while she wasn't as cold as Nesta, and Feyre herself says so. It was always interesting to me, how when it came to Elain the IC would say things like "Elain is different" Rhys himself said this. What is so different about Elain's situation? Is it because she chose to stay with them? is technically acting as one of the shadow twins, cleaning learning, and caring? which may be a way to make amends and this is why is different.

IDK what do you think about this, my love

I've missed your asks!!! I agree with your first point. Feyre bought Elain the seeds so if planting vegetables was such an obvious thing to do than why did Feyre buy Elain flower seeds? Yes, she knew Elain loved flowers however she had no issues asking for help in other ways (asking Nesta to chop wood for example). So why not say, "I'm going to buy you vegetables too, could you try to grow them?" I do think Sarah also addressed this entire thing later in ACOTAR, when the sisters are in their new estate and Elain says she'd like to plant a vegetable garden by the greenhouse if she could learn enough about it over the next few months. For whatever reasons, it doesn't seem like it was feasible for Elain to grow a garden in their cottage. To your second point, I think what Rhys is saying boils down to what Sarah has been telling us about Elain all along (in the books and in interviews). Rhys is Illyrian and knows he will do whatever is necessary to protect his people. Feyre, as his mate (and now with Illyrian anatomy) will do whatever is necessary to protect their people. The IC will do whatever is necesary to protect the people. It doesn't matter if they need to lie, steal or murder, they will become monsters to do what needs done. Rhys tells Feyre that Elain is Elain and Nesta is Illyrian at heart. To me that means that Nesta is exactly like the rest of the IC, he senses in her the ability to do whatever needs done to protect those she loves and it bothers him that she didn't follow through with that in the human lands. In contrast Elain is not written as morally gray (not like the others). She is not willing to do whatever needs to be done at any cost, it seems her character has limits. She's not revenge seeking, cruelty bothers her, etc. That's not to say Elain isn't just as strong but her strength lies elsewhere, in her kindness and generosity, her willingness to apologize for her mistakes, her ability to see everyone's POV (not just this person or that person because of her relation to them), offer forgiveness, to openly express her affections (something Sarah even mentioned in interviews, where Nesta and even Feyre found it difficult to be as open / as soft in their love as Elain). The NC is a land of lethal beauty, they will play the role of Dark Lords and Death personified when they need to. Nesta fits in to all of that. Elain does not. She refused the leathers, returned TT without looking back, was quick to deflect what she did to the King in the war, seemed shocked by Nesta's brutality with the King. I think Rhys knows that Elain is not Illyrian at heart, she is not the NC at heart and that's why he would not have expected her to do whatever needed to be done while in the human lands. I think he sees that her nature was more nurturer than survivor / warrior. Is that fair? Maybe not? But at the same time, is it fair to expect all people to behave in exactly the same way? I always think back on the Hunger Games. When Katniss left, she didn't insist Prim head out into the woods to begin hunting in her stead. Instead, she focused on what Prim's strengths were, to use her goat to bring in cash flow and asked Gail to continue hunting for her family. Prim also became a doctor / healer like her mother and I rarely see anyone give backlash regarding her character. I don't think I've ever seen anyone hold it against Prim that she did not become a hunter / warrior type the way they hold it against Elain for not hunting. If Elain were not in the house I imagine it would have felt like a Civil War in that place, what with Nesta, Feyre and their father. But Elain managed to maintain a decent relationship with all three and I think the role of peace maker is often overlooked but something that is at the core of Elain's strength and why I think she'd make an amazing High Lady someday.

[mal-lunar-28]

So finally here I come with my feelings about this chapter: devastated, utterly destroyed that's how I felt throughout all the chapter 🚶‍♀️🏃‍♀️😭😭

he fell deeper in this dark hole with Kat even though he didn't intend to. She just filled this void that he had, and it's fucked up of him to lean on the girl that messed up everything you two had in the first place.

I don't want to assume that Minho cheated on the reader before the accident, cuz if that's the case I would utterly prefer for them never getting back together... But what can I say? I think Minho deserves all the pain he's feeling, putting everything in perspective if I was the mc the moment I get back my memories and everything knowing that whereas I was dying he was getting his dick wet? I'll kill him ngl.

Let's say that I guess that the argument they had before the accident has to do with the reader feeling insecure, threatened by the presence of Kat in Minho's life? Or maybe she knew that Kat wanted her man? Obviously jealousy takes a great portion into this? The thing for me that's unforgivable and unforgettable is that Minho could have waited to have sex idk how to explain it but they all were preparing for the mc to die right, maybe his way of coping is by having sex?

The thing is he decided to have sex with the girl that messed everything in the first place for him and the mc, he did that conscious for me it doesn't matter that the mc was dying he at least could have waited to move on? Doing the maths mc had the accident like six months ago right? She's been awake for three months? It doesn't exactly counts as cheating but it's painful to think about it, especially knowing–assuming? that their problem before the accident was because of that girl...

I know they're the endgame but I guess I want Minho to see her at least try to get with someone else? Like I'm sorry but no, I want him to suffer a little more, squirm and panic even more? Cuz everything he did at some point that lead him to this situation is exclusively his fault.. He took some awful decisions, and technically he didn't, hasn't cheated? But it is close to it.. So for me the pain he's experiencing is justified, and I'm glad he knows he deserves it like if it's his destiny to see the love of his life falling for someone else yk?

The accident is/was not his fault, clearly, but they're so many things he could've done to prevent it... talking about that what happen to the Uber driver? Did something happen to them?

"Kat?" He repeats and looks at you. You nod at him so innocently and it hits him how much the accident has changed you. Of course, not your fault. But it goes to show how difficult it's been having to adjust. "We— she— that's not really a thing anymore, I guess?"

PAIN, LET ME SPELL IT FOR YOU P-A-I-N.

How do you continue to love someone who doesn't remember you the way you remember them— who doesn't love you the way you love them?

So much fucking pain.

I guess everything I wanted to say is that I don't think he cheated per se but he deciding/being close to Kat gave the mc reasons/the right? to feel angry/jealous/insecure? and to add to that he deliberately chose to have sex with Kat after everything, like it does put in perspective to why happened what happened.. And it's even more painful to see him have sex with that girl, if it was strangers he was having sex with I think I could forget about him getting his dick wet while the mc was in the hospital, but Kat being the reason why everything went to drain? It justifies a little why and what Jisung and the others have done, that I think that the mc deserved to know since a little after she woke up from the comma? Yeah, she deserved to know but how Jisung as a friend of hers would have the heart to tell her that first she had a boyfriend since high school but they're like broken up? And that maybe they were having arguments because another girl and hey your boyfriend still is having sex with said girl? I'd kill myself on the spot even if I don't remember anything and what hurts the most is that mc her heart yearns for Minho even if her mind/brain doesn't it, it's like muscle memory...

I don't know where you're gonna take us with this story even tho we know somehow how this is gonna end but the journey to get to the end of this story is what matters, even tho I'm suffering a lot yk I feel like I indeed had an accident in these story 😭😭😭that's some other level of parasocial but I guess I'm deeply connected with this story ❤️❤️

So kudos author this is PAIN but your writing it's so lovely

blue side of the sky (lmh) | eight.

♡ spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: waking up after 3 months with no recollection of your past, your friends do what they can to help you remember. except, they omit an important piece to the puzzle - afraid you would remember the heartbreak and hurt all over again.

—pairing: lee know x f. reader

—genre: (18+) exes to lovers, bestfriends to lovers au | fluff, angst, (eventual) smut

—word count: 5.5k

—chapter warnings: cussing/mature language, mentions of alcohol consumption (not by oc), very platonic slow-dancing with jisung, we hear jisung's feelings about the accident 🥺, a bit more descriptive details of the accident, more minho x oc interactions yay!!, flashback - kisses/probably err on the side of making out lol

"Shit, I need to be at Yeong-Su's in the next five minutes or else my parents are gonna kill me." Jisung huffs as he struggles to get his tie done. You put your eyelash curler down to help him because you can't watch him struggle any longer. You step in front of him and take over, neatly securing his tie around his neck before looking up at him with a small smile. "Thank you." He lets out a breath of relief before looking at himself in the mirror once more. 

"You're welcome. You should go."

"You're gonna be okay?"

"I will."

"What are you trying to say?" Chan yells from their room, making the two of you laugh.

"You look beautiful, cielo."

"Thanks. You don't look too bad yourself, pachi." He smiles.

"See you guys down there." He calls out before rushing out of the room to meet the groom and the groomsmen. You finish curling your lashes, adding some light falsies to spruce up your look. You didn't add much makeup since you were going for a more natural look, but you were satisfied with how it turned out in the end.

You weren't entirely sure in the beginning, you hadn't done this in a very long time. It feels nice.

When you finally give your hair one last fix and spray a bit of perfume, you step into Chan and Seungmin's room, seeing them fix their suits a few times while looking in the mirror. Chan's eyes dart from the mirror to you, then back to the mirror before he's doing a double take.

"Wow, you look amazing Y/N." He turns to look at you. "And you were saying you weren't sure about the dress?"

"I just haven't dressed up like this in awhile, you know?" You shrug. "San said it was nice." Your hands brush down the fabric of the dress while Seungmin and Chan chuckle.

"San was right." Chan nods. "Though, I hope he knows we won't make it easy for him to weasel his way into your heart." Chan focuses on tightening his tie once more.

"Seriously, Y/N. You look stunning." Seungmin adds. "Ready to go?"

"Mhm. Ready when you two are."

"Alright, let me just throw on my watch and I'll be good." Chan says, snatching his Rolex off of the nightstand and securing it around his wrist. The three of you head straight towards the garden area, your eyes light up at all the wedding decorations. The venue was decorated beautifully with its sage, taupe and champagne flowers and tones.

You're pulled out of your daze when you hear a familiar voice greeting Seungmin and Chan, Chan glancing over at you once you've met the eyes of said familiar voice.

"Y/N, hey." Minho says, slowly eyeing you up and down. "W-wow, you look amazing." You look at him with a small smile as you also peep his outfit— a  crisp button up with a black tie, sleeves rolled up mid-way with nicely pleated grey slacks. It's simple, but it works well for him. His long, brown hair slightly drapes over his eyes, a silver watch sitting prettily on his wrist.

"Hey Minho. Thanks, you don't look too bad yourself." You chuckle just as Chan gently tugs at the gift bag in your hand.

"I'll go place this down at the gift table for you, alright? Gotta put my gift down too." You give him a small nod before returning your attention to Seungmin and Minho. They're chatting amongst themselves, and you find yourself shuffling closer to Seungmin as the crowd grows.

"You okay?" Minho suddenly asks. "Did you take your medicine?" Seungmin subtly bites onto his bottom lip while he watches your eyes shift upwards at Minho. Suddenly, Minho feels a little embarrassed for outwardly showing his worry for you. He knows this isn't the time, he knows he needs to step back. "Sorry, I—"

"It's okay." You give him a reassuring nod. "I did this morning. I appreciate the reminder, though." Minho simply nods in acknowledgement before Seungmin butts in.

"We should find our seats." He says, watching the rest of the guests settle into their seats. Seungmin's hand settles on the small of your back, gently pressing you towards the way to your seats. At this point, Chan re-joins the group and follows along, greeting some of Jisung's family members on the way over. Seungmin takes the seat near the aisle, followed by you, Chan and Minho. Just as Chan settles into the seat, Minho meets your eyes and his facial expression softens. The corner of his lips tug upwards into a tiny smile that you almost miss, and he doesn't necessarily peel his eyes off of you even as the pianist starts to play the entrance song.

You feel that look settle in the pit of your stomach.

"Oh shit, it's starting already." Chan harshly whispers over to you and Seungmin. The three of you stand as the pianist plays the song loudly, the bridesmaids accompanied by the groomsmen. Jisung walks down the aisle with a smug smirk on his face that makes Chan, Minho and Seungmin quietly laugh to themselves. Shortly following behind is another couple, then another— until the entire group passes and lines up at the altar. Once they've settled in their positions alongside of Yeong-Su, Yuna begins to make her way down the aisle looking beautiful as ever in her wedding dress.

You watch the way Yuna and Yeong-Su look at each other so lovingly in the eyes as they go through their vows, the tears still flowing down their cheeks— causing everyone in attendance to break into their own tears and sniffles. You wonder what it's like to be completely enamored by someone, to love someone so deeply and with everything in you; 

What is love?

Were you ever in love at some point? True, genuine love? 

Your eyes wander to the ocean just behind the venue, before they fall onto Minho again. But, when you turn, you find that he's looking at you already and his expression is unreadable. He is always unreadable, but it's the feeling you get that confuses you the most.

"Kiss!" Seungmin yells just as the crowd begins to yell along, making you chuckle. Minho is no longer looking at you, and he's snapped himself back to current times— back to reality.

God.

The wedding passes quickly, with the reception following shortly behind. It's a short distance of a walk, the huge tent with champagne-colored drapes right around the corner of the hotel. The view of the sunset and ocean is clearer in this area, with the breeze a bit stronger [though it hits the drapes and decorations beautifully]. 

"Cielo." Jisung comes from behind, causing you to turn over your shoulder to look at him. "Are you still doing okay?"

"Mhm." You nod. "I was just about to to grab a drink."

"I can do it—"

"It's fine, pachi. I got it." You give him a toothless smile as you step forward to the self-serve area for the drinks; all the fruit-flavored, non-alcoholic drinks lined up in cute beverage dispensers with gold detailing. You help yourself to some of the strawberry mango concoction that's almost gone, waiting for every drip to fall into your cup.

"I'm nervous." Jisung whines a bit, watching as you wait for your cup to fill.

"Why are you nervous? You're going to be fine, Ji."

"I haven't sang in front of my family in such a long time."

"And I'm sure you'll do great. They'll love you. Besides, you'll have Seungmin with you." You finally bring your cup up to your lips while you turn to Jisung.

"You don't think my singing voice is icky, right?"

"Jisung, please." You chuckle and shake your head. "Your voice is lovely. Your family will love it." You give his arm a gentle squeeze. "Promise." He lets out a deep breath before he nods.

"You're right." He walks alongside of you as you walk back to the table, Chan helping himself to the salad and bread that was just served. The three of you engage in small talk over some food, while Minho decides to sip on his drink near the open bar area. He watches the way you laugh and smile, his gut wishing he was the reason why—

"Please tell me you're just taking way too long to decide which drink you'll go for after you finish that." Seungmin comes to his side, making Minho damn near choke on the cocktail he's sipping.

"Excuse you."

"Creep." Seungmin gives him a look and Minho glares at him.

"I was just people-watching."

"Like that makes it any better."

"Would you mind your own business, Kim Seungmin? Don't you have a song to sing soon?"

"Soon, not right now." Seungmin sips on his cocktail before digging his other hand into his pocket. "So, staring at Y/N?"

"I wasn't staring at her." Minho looks at him, but all Seungmin does is cock a brow up. "I mean I was, but like, I was just making sure she was okay.. from a distance. It wasn't too long ago when I brought her to urgent care."

"Was that hard?"

"What?"

"To say that you care."

"She's still my bestfriend at the end of the day." Minho blurts out the first excuse that comes to mind even though he has no right to play that card.

"Alright then." Seungmin shrugs, half-understanding why Minho was acting the way he was, half-not-understanding why he couldn't just say what was on his mind. "Whatever you say, my guy. I'm gonna head back to our friends." He heads for the table with Minho following shortly after.

The remainder of the program goes by beautifully, with Jisung, the rest of the bridesmaids and groomsmen giving their thoughtful and sweet speeches. You've cried once or twice, especially when Yuna shares a dance with her father, and Yeong-Su gives his own speech to everyone before catering to his now-wife. There are special surprise performances from family, one being Jisung and Seungmin's performance— singing to Alto Moon's 'Mars.'

As soon as the dance portion of the night begins, Chan whisks you away to the dance floor, twirling you around before the both of you start to dance along to the song. Shortly, Seungmin joins along after he's found his way towards you two, then Jisung, Yuna and Yeong-Su. Minho joins the circle, laughing and enjoying himself across from you. Nonetheless, it's a good time and you find yourself having tons of fun with Jisung's family and your friends. You almost don't want the weekend to come to an end because you'll be looking to relive the entire thing all over again.

It's the first time you've felt alive in awhile.

"Hey." Jisung slips into the empty seat next to Seungmin while you two sit down for a break. "Please, help. I need a break from them." He points at his family. "They're killing me with the pictures." He tries to duck by Seungmin's figure to avoid people calling him over.

"Sucks to be you." You laugh at Seungmin's remark. "Jisung is over here!" Seungmin calls out, making Jisung punch him on the bicep.

"You asshole." He moves away from his seat to keep dodging his family, putting his hand out for you to grab when the songs begin to slow down. "Perfect timing! Let's go dance, cielo." Jisung brings you out onto the floor for a slow dance. You wrap your arms around his neck and he holds you around the waist, the both of you swaying to the slow beat of the song.

"Are you having a good time? Feeling okay?"

"I am. Thank you for bringing me along."

"Of course, I knew you'd enjoy it." He chuckles a bit.

"No, really. Thank you." You pull back to look at him. "You know, for always looking out for me and being there for me? For being patient? I know it might not be easy after everything that's happened. Or, I might not be the easiest to take care of, but you make life a lot smoother."

"Cielo, you're my bestfriend. I'll do anything for you." He lets out a breath. "When the accident happened, I was scared." Even if he won't get into too many details right now, it's the first time Jisung is really speaking up about the accident. "I couldn't help but blame myself because I felt like I could've done better. I spent nights trying to figure out where I could have prevented this from happening, where I lacked in keeping you safe. Why I didn't do certain things—"

"Jisung, that wasn't your fault."

"Still." He looks at you. "Maybe I should've prevented you from leaving that night. I should have made you stay knowing the storm was at its peak." You can't even remember the night of the accident, but your uncle had briefly mentioned leaving Jisung's. Why you were there, you weren't sure. Why you left, you aren't sure. But you hopped in an Uber, the driver losing control of the car when a drunk driver in the opposite lane swerved— causing the car to flip when you were only 5 minutes away from home.

It makes you sick to even think about it. That's one thing you don't want ever to relive, or have memories of.

"There are things you can't protect me from, pachi." You say softly while looking up at him. "Just as me with you."

"I just should've done better, Y/N. I could have." He clears his throat. "You were almost taken away from me. I'll never let another opportunity slip past me again." He looks at you as if it's the last time he's looking at you. But before the moment carries on, he pulls you in, hugging you tightly and warmly. He keeps you close, because that's what he feels like he needs to do from this moment on.

"I'm here, pachi." You softly say as you part from him. All he can do is look at you and nod, giving you some space as the next song begins to play. 

"I know." At this point, Jisung's mom comes from behind him and sweetly asks for a dance from her son. You hand him off, smiling at them right before you turn on your heel to head to the bathroom. Luckily, it isn't too far into the hotel. You can't wait to relieve yourself and freshen up a bit, giving yourself a bit of a break before heading back out to be surrounded by people and loud music.

Once you feel like you've given yourself a good enough breather, you leave the bathroom and turn the corner—

"Woah." Minho says, his hands immediately coming to your elbows. "Oh jeez, I'm so sorry Y/N." He says when he realizes it's you he almost ran into. 

"You're alright." You chuckle. "I shouldn't have turned the corner so quickly." He puts on a small smile.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I just needed a little bathroom break and a quick breather." You look past his shoulder to get a glimpse of the party. "Is Jisung still with his mom?" He shakes his head.

"No, but his auntie."

"Of course. I saw you and Chan with the aunties earlier."

"Gotta save them a dance or two, you know?" You giggle.

"How sweet." Pause. Silence. Minho observes every inch of your face, body— the scar on your cheek from the accident, and the one near your hairline. You're beautiful, and he doesn't even care if he's staring.

All that liquid courage, especially.

"You really do look amazing tonight."

"Thank you, Minho." You fiddle with your fingers. "I should let you get back to.. you know.." He lets out a small breathy laugh just as you see Jisung hurrying into your point of view.

"Please. Help." You read Jisung's lips and furrow your brows, causing Minho to turn over his shoulder and look at him.

"He always needs saving." Minho rolls his eyes, making you laugh at his statement.

"Are you gonna head back to the table after?" He nods.

"Yeah. But for now, I think you should get to Jisungie before he cries."

"Right. I'll see you later." You chuckle as you walk past him and meet Jisung, who is hiding from his aunties [again] even in plain sight. 

Minho is left alone to ponder on his thoughts, and he can't stand this.

Actually, he can't stand himself. Cause god, he was preparing to accept the worst. To lose you, to not have you around. To have something taken away from him so suddenly.

Then, that wasn't the case. But that's not the issue at all, no. He's happy and he can't stop thanking the higher power for giving you another chance at life. He doesn't know what he'd do without you, you were always important to him. Always will be.

Still, you are what he loves the most.

But he can't stand himself because he's here, acting like everything is fine. He was heartbroken when you didn't remember who he was, had no recollection of the memories you two shared— he fell deeper in this dark hole with Kat even though he didn't intend to. She just filled this void that he had, and it's fucked up of him to lean on the girl that messed up everything you two had in the first place. He couldn't help himself. But, what breaks his heart the most now is that you don't know, and you may or may not ever know. He couldn't dare to see you crying or hurt. Even though Minho really wants to be honest, he really wants to tell you.

You two have so much to talk about.

He looks at you as you hit the dance floor with the group and he's just not sure when or how to do this— how to even act around you because you're the girl he's always loved. You're the girl he imagined spending his entire life with. But you're also the same girl he hurt so, so deeply.

He's the one who brought you all this love, along with all this hurt, and he'll never forgive himself for it. 

He wishes it wasn't so difficult because when he looks at you, he wishes he could love you time and time again— like the world was due to end any minute now.

That's way too selfish of him, though. He's already been selfish once, and he won't dare to be that selfish again. He'll try not to.

Not if it hurts you.

Jisung joins Yeong-su and the groomsmen for a little after party at a nearby bar, while Chan and Seungmin busy themselves with rounds of Mario Party in the room. You decide that you want to walk and experience more of the ocean, listening to the waves crash against the sand under the cool weather.

"I'm going to walk around the hotel."

"Wait, do you want one of us to come?" Chan's eyes are fixated on the screen in front of him as he furiously presses the button on the controller.

"No, it's okay. I just wanted to take a quick walk and sit by the water for a minute. I'll come back." You stand at their doorway and give them a small smile.

"You su— ah, fuck off dude!" Seungmin yells. "Are you sure, Y/N?" He repeats to finish off his previous thought.

"More than sure." You give them one last wave before heading out the door. After the wedding, you quickly took a shower and threw on some cotton shorts, a baby tee and a loose zip-up to protect you from the colder breeze at this time of night. You zip it up halfway, tugging on the zipper as you step into the elevator and head down to the first floor. It's still pretty lively, with guests at the restaurant and bar. Just as you send a text to your uncle to let him know you're okay, you do a double-take when you catch a familiar face sitting in the same exact dining area where you and Seungmin sat yesterday.

You don't say much, but you're quick to find out that you don't need to. As if his instinct told him to turn right at the moment, he does. He catches your eyes as he's about to take another sip, a subtle smile forming at the corner of his lips when you shyly wave. He sets the glass down and lets the waiter know he's finished, acknowledging him once more before making his way over to you. He smiles a bit, but you can tell he's nervous [partially tipsy, too].

"I didn't think I'd run into you out here." Minho says, making you chuckle as he continues to walk alongside of you.

"I wanted to walk around and sit by the water for a bit."

"Not tired?" You shrug.

"I am, but I wanted to get a better view of the ocean before leaving." You look up at him. "I could ask you the same."

"I figured I'd explore around too."

"See." You giggle.

"What's Chan and Seungmin doing?"

"Playing Mario Party." He chuckles.

"Of course." It's silent for a bit before the two of you head down the steps and finally hit the sand. "They didn't wanna join?"

"I mean they asked, but I told them they didn't need to. Don't wanna interrupt their session."

"They'll live." You laugh a bit and nod.

"It's alright." Minho catches you take in a deep breath before exhaling, biting onto your bottom lip as you slowly take steps forward, closing in to the water. It falls silent between you two, but it's a comfortable silence. You take in the view, while Minho observes you.

Calm. 

Beautiful.

So—

"So pretty." His head tilts to the side because yes, you are.

"Yeah, it is."

"I think I want to draw or paint this when I get back home." You quickly snap a photo.

"You should." You look at him and give him another small, toothless smile before sitting on the sand. Minho stands for a bit before he finally sits next to you— legs propped up while his hands rest on his knees. "How's all of that going?"

"I don't know. Better? Finally feeling some kind of inspiration to get back into art." You smile out towards the water. "I haven't done much yet. But either way, it's refreshing."

"That's good. How are the pottery classes?"

"Fun." You shrug. "Keeps me busy." You tuck your knees to your chest and look at him again. "I think I wanna work at the florist shop near Sunday Morning." 

"Really? That'll be fun, too." Minho chuckles a bit. "You sure you're ready?" You nod.

"Yeah, think so. I feel ready. San said I should go for it, too." Minho's smile slowly fades. Of course he did. 

"How's that?" He forces himself to ask, though he's afraid of the answer. Selfishly so. Here he goes, already failing with being selfish.

"Which? San?" You ask him, genuinely confused about the question.

"Mhm."

"He's becoming a good friend. We hang out, we talk." 

"As long as he's good to you, Y/N." He's not even sure what direction that statement is going, but whatever it is— he truthfully and wholeheartedly means it. If San is what will make you happy, then he will let you be happy.

That's the most important.

"It's good company, that's all." Your arm brushes against his, but you don't react much about it. "Enough about me though, what about you?"

"I'm a boring person."

"Clearly not if we're bestfriends." You chuckle a bit.

"All I do is exist, Y/N. Truthfully. I just work, dance, cook." Minho laughs at how pathetic he's making himself sound right now, but it's true. It's all he does.

"Well, what about Kat?" He shivers a bit. It's weird how her name used to be like venom. Now, it's.. nothing?

"Kat?" He repeats and looks at you. You nod at him so innocently and it hits him how much the accident has changed you. Of course, not your fault. But it goes to show how difficult it's been having to adjust. "We— she— that's not really a thing anymore, I guess?"

"So, you two were dating officially?"

"No. Never. We casually saw each other but that's all." He swallows the lump in his throat.

"I'm sorry, Minho."

"No need." He chuckles. "We were never going to be serious. I just finally learned how to walk away from it. The hard way."

"I hope you really are okay." You rest your chin against your knees. 

"I am. Don't worry about me." It falls silent for a moment before you call for him.

"Minho?"

"Yeah?"

"This is nice. I.. haven't been able to talk to you much, so it's nice to hear your voice more." He smiles before his head drops and he shakes his head.

"I know, I'm sorry. I just get occupied, and I always try to keep myself busy. Plus, I wanted to give you your space for a bit."

"I understand." You sigh. "This must be weird for you."

"No." He shakes his head. "It's not weird or anything. Don't ever think that."

"You feel distant."

"I'm not gonna lie, it's difficult because a lot has changed." He looks at you before tearing his eyes away. "I'm terrible at coping, and I'm terrible at dealing with big changes. All my own personal struggles, that's all."

"I get that."

"But I am sorry you feel that way. I know I should've done better, especially as your bestfriend. I haven't acted like it."

"It's okay, Minho. You don't have to apologize."

"I do. You deserve that from me." He looks at you again and his eyes soften. How he wishes he could pull you close, hold you, reassure you through a kiss on the forehead. 

He feels his heart sink to the pit of his stomach, so he shifts and focuses on the water, listens to the waves crashing against the sand.

Maybe one day, he'll be able to look at you for longer.

"I wish you didn't leave so quickly after you brought me home from the clinic."

"I wanted you to get your rest."

"Jisungie was there. I was looking for you. I wish you stayed." This is what makes it difficult. You looked for him. He feels like it's been forever since that happened.

"I'm sorry." He replies softly. "I'll make it up to you, okay?"

"You can by staying and not hurrying away next time." You feel your heart thumping in your chest, and you're not sure why you feel so shy, so nervous around Minho right now. The root feeling you get with him is unfamiliar, strange— falls into the category of known unknowns. But, one thing is for sure: you crave Minho's company.

"I can do that." You nod before letting out a small yawn into your elbow. "Maybe we should head back so you can sleep?"

"Yeah, I think the exhaustion is finally hitting me." You giggle, watching as Minho stands and dusts himself off. He puts out a hand, letting you grab onto his to help pull you up to do the same. "At least I got to enjoy the ocean." You turn to him as you start to walk back into the hotel. "Thanks for spontaneously joining me."

"Of course."

"Are you on the fourth floor too?" He shakes his head.

"I booked my room a little last minute so I'm on the seventh." He digs his hands into his pockets. "Is Jisungie back?"

"No. He probably won't be back until later."

"Hm." He hums as he presses the elevator button.

"I think we're getting breakfast tomorrow right? Us 5?"

"Mhm. If Jisung is alive." You laugh and step inside.

"True. He'll be a mess later."

"Do you wanna sleep in my room?" You raise a brow at him and he instantly retracts. "Oh no, no— sorry, I meant like, you can sleep in my bed— fuck." He groans. before gathering his thoughts again. "We can switch. So you don't have to deal with him later." You laugh.

"It's alright. If I need help, I'll call you. How about that?"

"Fair enough."

"I'm sure he'll be okay." The elevator dings when it his the fourth floor. "Thanks again for the company. I'll see you tomorrow morning?"

"Yeah." You smile. 

"Goodnight, Minho."

"Goodnight." His eyes are glued onto you even as you turn on your heel and walk down the hallway, the elevator doors closing in front of him.

Now, he feels empty.

He's left with another piece of his heart broken, left with the unbearing sadness and anxiety he feels every time you walk away from him.

How do you continue to love someone who doesn't remember you the way you remember them— who doesn't love you the way you love them?

☁︎ FLASHBACK | A NIGHT DURING FRESHMAN YR IN COLLEGE

"Ouch, fuck!" You whine as you almost slip on the dirt, making your way up the stupid fucking hill behind campus. "If I break my ankle or fall, this will be all your fault Lee Minho."

"You're fine! We're almost there, princess." He laughs loudly as he watches you struggle climbing up the somewhat steep hill. Minho holds his hand out for you to grab, giving you some leverage to tackle the dirt path. You squeal a bit when you feel him pull you upwards, letting out a laugh when you finally get your footing together on flat ground.

"All this for the tower." You dust yourself off and look up at the abandoned watch [fire?] tower nestled up in the hills behind campus. "So worth." You turn to look at the town's view ahead.

"Atta girl." Minho smiles and nods towards the tower. "Come, let's go up the stairs and sit up there." He swings the rusted, metal gate open to lead you to the stairs.

"We're not gonna get in trouble, right?"

"Baby, baby, baby." He says in a certain tone. "Are we really asking that question?"

"Well, I don't know!" Minho steps aside to let you climb up the steps first. "Campus security could see us from down there and catch an attitude about us being here at this time!"

"Then we'll just tell them we're not getting any younger. It's a must to explore what's outside of campus before we're thrusted in the real world." You snort as you reach the end, feet stepping onto the platform. It isn't an incredibly huge tower— quite frankly, it's tiny and you're not even sure why the dang thing existed in the first place. But, there's nothing eery to it at all. It's a nice spot to have these moments.

"A prophet. I am dating a prophet."

"Maybe." Minho laughs as he sits on the platform and takes a swig of his water. "Sit with me. Please?" Is all he says when he reaches for your hand and gently pulls you in between his legs. You sit contently, letting Minho lazily wrap his arm around your neck before planting a kiss on your temple.

"It's a perfect night." You look up at the dark, night sky, counting as stars in your immediate view. You feel your body into Minho's as he adjusts his position and holds you closer to him. "Thanks for taking me up here, love."

"Course." He gives you a small smile. "Just don't tell Ji or else he's gonna be pissed. He's been wanting to do the hike up here but I keep telling him I'm too lazy."

"Too lazy, huh?" You chuckle.

"Gotta make princess happy first and foremost." He boops the tip of your nose, making you slightly turn over your shoulder to meet his eyes.

"Hey, babe?"

"Hm?" He hums as he gently pushes the hair away from your face.

"What do you think life would be like for us in a couple of years?"

"Well." He lets out a breath as you lay back on him, the both of you watching the hustle and bustle of the town. "I'd be owning a café. You'll be teaching art, maybe opening your own little boutique for it. We'd probably live together, and I'll start stressing on how to propose to you as time continues to go on—"

"Woah, propose?" You smirk and playfully push him. "Is that so?"

"I thought we were looking at us in the future?"

"Cute. Do you think we're too young to think like that?" Minho shakes his head.

"Maybe." He presses a kiss to the top of your head. "But I'm sure of it. I think that counts for something." You let out a soft, breathy laugh.

"Yeah, you're right." You nod and lay back on him. "I like that. I like future us."

"Good." You scoff before laughing. Minho continues to stare at you, smile slowly fading when his eyes shift from yours, to your lips— back up to your eyes. "So pretty."

"It's nighttime." He shrugs as he leans in slowly.

"And? Can still see you perfectly." He mumbles just as his lips brush against yours— sending tingles down your spine. You subtly bite onto your bottom lip, closing in on the kiss. Minho holds the kiss for a moment before he inches back, coming in for another shortly after. This time, his tongue lightly glides across your bottom lip; his way of asking for permission to take the kiss a little deeper. 

And you let him.

You slightly turn to position yourself better, hand coming up his neck, jaw, cheek, just as he sucks onto your bottom lip and tugs it back. You let out a soft sigh, smiling into the kiss as Minho continues.

"Maybe—we should—" You kiss him. "Head back?" He nods, giving you one last peck on the lips. 

"Yeah." You prepare to stand and dust yourself off when Minho grabs your wrist. "Hey, babe?" You turn to look at him when he gets himself up. "I love you."

"I love you, too." You smile and kiss him on the tip of his nose.

☁︎ END

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[deafchild2000]

Unpopular opinion: Lewis and the girls shouldn't had taken a lot of Louise and Max's advice to heart.

Keep in mind: The 50s mermaids starred in the FIFTIES! Unlike modern teens, this 50s group was, for starters (if you pinpoint the old mermaids starting their journey in 1955), presumably 15 years since the group was born (early 1940s) and 10 years since the World War 2 ended. Teenagers had it differently than those in the 2000s (namely in sexism, communism, racism and the uprising of rock and roll, jazz and swing dancing) and especially in the social norms deemed ordinary for teenagers at that time.

The 50s mermaids tried to make the most of their years as teens and supernaturals creatures, especially with Max's help. They went to dances, had dates, played board games and had fun.

But then things change. Like all teenagers, the bigger picture sets in sooner or later.

This applies to Gracie. Looking back at 2x19, her distance from her friends and Max felt...familiar. I'm not going to headcanon, but her life must have not been easy. She was happy that Max found out her secret yet when Max started to experiment on the moon pool, that's when she started drifting away. Max created the locket to keep the girls together, to remember they're special, and Gracie let it go. And there's must be more to the story. Just because the girls between eras mirrored each other (powers, necklaces, personality traits, or life-altering moments) doesn't guarantee that they shared the entirely same life experiences. Whatever could've cause Gracie to willingly give up her tail for a normal life, it must have been bigger than her just yearning for her old life back! (And even if it was, there's no reason to judge her for that! Especially considering she's the first apparent one in the group to moved on with her life.)

And that goes back to Louise and Max, particularly Louise. As enchanting as a "mysterious lady who lives on a boat and had a magical secret" sounds, I wish we knew why she had no family or next of kin [mentioned]. Considering everything she's said, we never know what became of her powers. But she got married and lived on The Lorelei until it sunk. Louise is technically the first one we know of who got married, so she at least had time to mature and see Gracie's side of things. Judging from her life, Louise's husband must've known her secret. And there's the fact they didn't have kids, either by choice or inability to do so. And this is Emma's counterpart, who just-so-happened to not be around when Emma needed advice about Ash and her secret.

I get it, when she told the girls to stick together [as three], it came off well-meaning at first, but it also caused problems. She'd been so removed from Julia and Gracie she hadn't known that either of them died, or at least Julia, as far as we go. And when she told the girls about how the lockets were meant to make them feel special, she didn't even consider the possibility that either of her friends had left legacies behind. So because of that, where was she when Charlotte and the issue regarding the ownership of Gracie's locket came to light?

To conclude: Louise used the girls to relive an old friendship, gave half-assed advice for their mermaid sides, and didn't really help the girls when personal matters came in.

And now, the biggest lovestruck fool of all, the Hermit who didn't move on: Max Hamilton!

Max Hamilton is supposedly Lewis's 50s counterpart. The scientist in love with a mermaid. He's Lewis, in the same predicament he's in about a certain water-manipulating mermaid.

First off, Max discovered the 50s mermaids' secret when he followed them to Mako, right to the moon pool. Then, he started to experiments on the moon pool to help the girls, for them to understanding their change, which was around the time Gracie grew tired of being a mermaid. Max created the lockets to remind the girls how special they are, and it worked for a while, but eventually Gracie had enough, throwing away her locket. She gave up her tail and broke up with Max.

Keep in mind: This guy got dumped by a mermaid who chose to live as a HUMAN! While I can understand one relationship being the most definitive one of someone's existence, Max didn't move on. He did his research, which got published and was enough to attract Lewis, and then....didn't do anything with his life. We don't hear of him moving on, getting married, or at least having a kid or grandkid. He's just alone in his little house on the beach. Oh, and while they know each other, we never get any hints that Louise and him still talk. In comparison, he actually makes Louise look better.

He only lent Lewis his research once he became aware there was a new generation of mermaids walking around and Lewis was exactly where he was 50 years ago. He tells Lewis to hold onto Cleo, like he failed to hold onto Gracie.

See, when Gracie started to distance herself from the group, Max created the lockets to help the girls remind themselves of how special they are. The sentiment was nice, but then, after watching both sets of mermaids, I've come to a conclusion:

The lockets were shackles, tethers at least.

I know there's such thing as free will and choice, but the next generation ended up becoming very brazen with using their powers, even abusing them, in public. Charlotte is labeled by most as the worst agitator, but what about Rikki? Emma? Or Cleo? All of them have used their powers to do shitty things! And then when the issue over Gracie's locket comes up, it's not even subtle just how much toxicity came about because of it.

And judging by the way Max talked about Gracie in 2x19, it's more than obvious he was obsessed with her, almost like a posession instead of a girl he onced loved. And if you view something as a posession, you wanna put a claim on it.

What if Gracie, who just could've just kept the locket, CHOSE to throw it out so it wouldn't be a tether? What if she realized what she was to Max and threw it out to ensure no one would feel that way again?

If so, should we have really had taken everything Max said for granted? Yes, he helped everyone's FAVORITE couple realize they still love each other, but he also was the one who was more than happy to confirm to Gracie's granddaughter - who had basically figured everything out on her own - about the moon pool and what is does. And then, how much did he know AFTER she changed? We don't see Lewis confronting Max about it or how "coincidentally" his advice about the 50 Year Full Moon came when Charlotte was "on the darker side" of things with the group.

I'm more than convinced Max knew exactly what he was doing and played the group to be just like, or perhaps even better version of, the 50s mermaids.

And what gave him the right to do that? Like Louise, Max had plenty of moments to step in, to take back what he said, or perhaps, not been involved in all. If Cleo and Lewis were meant to be together, they'd find their was back to each other. If Charlotte was meant to be a mermaid, she'd still would've ended up on that Mako Island. And if there were meant to be ONLY 3 mermaids, then there wouldn't have been any grandkids who were hinted towards the truth.

In fact, all together, the biggest point of being a newer generation, where world order is better, racism isn't as rampant & POC are accepted, and women can especially have more life choices.

Unlike the 50s mermaids, the girls can go wherever they want, love who they want and it's their own choice to live how they wanted. Just as Rikki eventually found that balance and became a renowned diver, the girls could have learned to be more accepting. Charlotte could have been welcomed, and instead of all that ugliness, could have been reliable.

The 2000s mermaids may mirror the 50s mermaids, but they are not like nor have to be like them.

And Louise and Max should've know better than to hinder them from that.