#what's the point of putting literal days of work into something

[rikiislvr]

♥︎necklace (5) - nishimura riki

read part 1-4 to understand the plot better! (on my masterlist)

pairing: nishimura riki x afab!reader

so much money.

that was far out of your budget. you were gonna have to work 10x more than usual the moment you came back. but it was worth it right?

you can go support him. and watch him perform with your own eyes.

this entire day you’ve been out shopping, you had to catch your flight tonight since the performance was literally tomorrow.

you finally got your hands on your outfit you were gonna wear to the concert, you hurried home, packing anything else that was necessary,

making sure to alarm your parents before you just randomly left to korea,

and just like that. you were now on your flight to korea, sitting in the seat looking out the window, watching the clouds pass by the night sky, you fiddled with your hands…

was this a good idea?

of course it was but.. would he get mad at you for just randomly showing up with no word? no.. he’ll be happy to see you.

you just hoped it wasn’t too much of a push.

you sighed and reclined your chair, closing your eyes, listening to the soft sounds from the plane as you fell asleep, drowning out all your thoughts.

-

you woke up to the sound of the pilot on the speakers, alarming the passengers that the plane will be landing in 10 minutes. you rub your eyes and sat up.

you check your phone, nothing much but… one message caught your eye. it was from niki.

“wish you were here to see me perform :)”

underneath it says it was sent with a translator, which made you giggle how he put so much effort to talk to you even if it wasn’t in a language he knew well.

but little did he know, you were landing in korea right now.

you fiddle with his necklace that laid on your collarbones, smiling to yourself in excitement.

you weren’t sure why he brought so much happiness out of you. he was a idol who had millions of fans and somehow…

you’re the lucky one?

the plane began to land, and once it came to a full stop, passengers clapped and began to gather their things.

you stood up and grabbed your suitcase from the department above your seat and made your way off the plane.

you were so intrigued by the difference here in korea, it was so beautiful and everything looked so organized.

you caught a taxi, using a voice translator on your phone to tell the driver where your hotel was located before he drove off.

only thing on your mind was tonight. you were too excited to see him again.

on the other hand, niki was a bit down,

him and the group were practicing on the stage they were performing on later, but niki stepped out and sat on the side, sighing before fiddling with your necklace around his neck.

jake noticed this and walked over, furrowing his eyebrows, “is that hers?” he asks in korean, niki looks up and nodded softly.

jake chuckled and sat beside him. “you really like her huh?”

niki sighed and ran his finger through his hair, he didn’t reply, and jake took that as his answer, “what’s on your mind? you seem stressed? is it the concert?” jake asks,

niki shook his head, “i don’t know hyung.. i wish i could see her again.” niki shrugged, jake felt empathy, he never seen niki like this for a girl, because niki never ever spoke about a girl before, so this was new behavior.

“let’s do good today, maybe she’ll be watching?” jake tried to cheer him up, niki tilt his head, pointing to the crowd, jake chuckled, “no- i meant like… watching it online or something. she’ll want to see you do your best right?”

niki sighed and nod, jake stood back up and pulled him up to his feet to continue practicing.

meanwhile, you were getting settled into your hotel, it was so nice and organized, you relaxed for a bit before you started to get ready for the concert, putting on the outfit you put together, styling your hair, perfecting your makeup, you were almost done until you got a message.

you checked your phone, seeing niki’s name popping up at the top of your phone, making you smile instantly.

you opened the dm, seeing niki texted you, “one more hour….” with a emoji that quite literally detected his nervousness. you giggled softly and replied,

“you’re gonna do great!” hoping to reassure him, based off the performances you’ve watched of him, he was an amazing dancer.

you so badly wanted to tell him you’d be in the crowd, but you decided to keep that a secret for a little longer.

niki smiled at his phone before he was called by his leader to began getting ready, he put his phone away to get himself ready for the concert.

just like you were.

a/n: heeeeey guys it’s been so so long & im so sorry for the wait but i did miss you all! :( lmk if u guys like where the plot is going & if i should continue !!

taglist: @certified-ni-ki-lover @noblub-4ulolz @yourmyst4r @vixialuvs @ni-ki-ismyluv @judeduartewannabe @soobs-things @en-chantedtomeetyou @definitelynotherr @heyniki @wntersm @geniejunn @pkjay @baevsxii @k1ttylvr @geniejunn @pkjay @chaevibes @jiyeons-closet @rii7eis7 @jenscifer

[mwphisto]

LaDs: their night routine

~ bouncing off the sleep post, here’s my personal head canons on what their nightly routines look like before bed

Xavier

Starts his night routine the moment he gets home from work. Otherwise, he’d prob fall asleep instantly and feel nasty when he gets up.

He is stripping the second his foot hits the bathroom tile. Uniform in the hamper, water on scorching, the bathroom is filled with steam before he’s fully undressed and ready to go

Not guilty of using 3-1s but he does use the cheapest shampoo and conditioner imaginable. The kind you’d find at the grocery store that you know if you used it would totally dry out your hair. For him? It makes it incredibly soft and smells so damn nice (like vanilla)

He's the type to literally wash his face with dish soap and still have the softest, most flawless skin you've ever seen. He's settled for a soft face cloth and warm water post shower and then a moisturizer you bought him.

He'll towel dry and then blow dry his hair, brush it out, and then start brushing his teeth. His eyes are nearly closed at that point.

Zayne

His night routine depends on where he is and what he is doing. For example, if he's working overnight or even a twenty four hour shift? The most he's doing is showering before passing out.

If he's just finished a day shift, he's going to take a little more time with his night routine but the exhaustion still wears him down.

He's very much guilty of using a 2-1 just for the convenience of it. Mostly used when he is at the hospital just to save a little time. Somehow still looks good after using it (ugh, men.) At home, he's very much taken note of all the things you recommended for him - often asks for your help too hehe.

Uses nice shampoo and conditioner at home, not super high end but not something you can find at the convenient store. Smells like pears and jasmine and it's so soft, you could sniff his hair for hours.

He'll use a gentle face wash - your recommendation - brush his teeth (floss and mouthwash since you keep calling him out about his frequent dentist trips), and blow dry his hair before heading to bed for the night.

Rafayel

He takes his night routine very seriously. Typically starting it with a nice hot shower to get all the day's work off of him. Then, he follows it with long soak in the tub (legit like 2-4 hours). He'll sketch and sing and call you while he relaxes.

His shower routine consists of luxurious floral shampoo and a nice deep conditioning hair mask. His hair is naturally a bit wavy so he tries to make sure it's soft and nourished. His hair smells like cherry blossom and strawberry.

He'll let it air dry and then cringe when it poofs up, then he'll go in with leave in conditioner and some scalp serums before blow drying it.

His skin is literally flawless, so he uses a very gentle cleanser, a nice milky toner, a rich moisturizer, and lastly lip balm. But he brushes his teeth before the lip balm portion (which is flossing, brushing, and then mouth wash)

Sylus

He takes his time with his night routine if you're with him in the N109 Zone. Spa night of sorts. if your not with him? His routine is short yet efficient.

Shampoo, conditioner, and body wash are all per your recommendations. But he's very guilty of using the shampoo, conditioner, and fruity body wash you leave behind. Which he does with a smirk despite your complaining.

He's a shower, brush his teeth, shave if need be, and pass out in bed type of guy. But all of his products are top of the line, so like, he can put that little effort in and still look perfect (again, men.)

If you're still awake he'll video chat with you while he does his skincare (literally only does it if you're there or if he calls you) and catch up with you on your day.

He's a brush teeth and mouth wash person, he'll floss when he remembers... speaking of... do you think because he can heal himself he can just heal his cavities before they even happen?

Caleb

Night routine? He has none. I should just end this right here because oh lord help him. His night routine is enough to make anyone shiver. He wasn't that bad when he still lived with you, but on his own? Lord.

He's a bar soap type of guy, y'know the ones that leave a stiff feeling film on your skin? And he is so guilty of 3-1s please.

Once you're back in his life? You get him a whole regimen and call him each night to ensure he is properly doing it (if you don't live together already)

He uses apple scented products, all curtsy of you, shampoo, conditioner, and body wash all have some apple note in their scent profile. You also bought him an acne safe face wash (he had some acne in his teen years) a nice moisturizer, and a good razor for shaving. Oh and a few lip balms and chapsticks.

You set up an auto-renew subscription for these products so they show up at his doorstep before he can run out of them. He spent all those years taking care of you, now it's your tune to take care of him.

[peekofhistory]

Hi! Love your Tumblr! I'm fascinated by the fact that you are in China making and playing the Guqin, I was wondering if you can share a bit more about yourself and your background and why you decided to move to China? Like a self intro (that you're comfortable sharing). Thanks and have a nice day!!

Hello :D

How I ended up in Yangzhou learning to make/play the Guqin is a rollercoaster of a story xDD

As for my background, I was born in China (Beijing) and moved to the US when I was around 6 yrs old (my mom had moved several years earlier and I went to live with her). From the start my mom emphasized I can't forget I'm Chinese, because that's where I'm from and where my family's from, so she put in a lot of effort teaching me Chinese. She even had a colleague send over elementary school textbooks from China so she could teach me Chinese at home. She also got recordings of some Chinese TV shows and she'd watch them with me, explaining each episode and giving me information on that period of history.

Back then there weren't that many TV shows in China, and the ones we could access in the US were even less, so it was mostly classics shows like Journey to the West (1986), Dream of the Red Chamber (1987) and Romance of the Three Kingdoms (1994):

That really planted the root for my interest in Chinese history and culture. Especially in the case of Romance of the Three Kinggoms that was based on the actual Three Kingdoms period in Chinese history, it made me aware of how long China's history was and how rich and colourful it was, all the incredible historical figures, the battles of the past, the stories, etc.

Later on I also became interested in Chinese Opera (mainly Peking Opera, Huangmei Opera, and Shanghai Yue Opera):

We moved to Canada after a few years and stayed there until I graduated uni. I then went to Japan to work for a few yrs.

When I returned to Canada, it was 2018 and I found myself having to start all over career-wise. My experience in Japan really didn't help me at all when job hunting in Canada, and I ended up doing a few entry-level jobs in healthcare (office admin work). Then Covid and I lost my job, found another job about a year later, but still entry-level.

It was actually during the Covid break that I found out I could buy Hanfu fairly easily now. Throughout my time at uni and in Japan I didn't really check Chinese websites so I didn't know much about what was happening in China. During the Covid break, with nothing else to do at home, I found Taobao and realized the pretty clothes I adored in TV shows as a child I can now buy :D I went a bit crazy at first and ordered a whole bunch, but at the time I honestly didn't know too much about Hanfu aside from long robes, large sleeves, criss-crossed collars. But it was fun to wear them out (once lockdown ended) and actually feel like the characters I once saw on TV:

The job I had just before I came to China I actually really enjoyed, the work itself was fulfilling, the pay wasn't great but OK, and my co-workers for the most part were pretty good (my direct supervisor was great, I really, really enjoyed working with her). Unfortunately there was some changes to staffing in the office and the workload became really bad. I found myself literally having nightmares about work, and crying driving to and from work everyday. I decided I needed to quit. It was taking over my life 24/7, I was constantly tense and dreaded having to go to the office every morning.

At this point I'm in my late 30s and I took a few months to think about what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. Either look for another regular office job that may or may not be better than the last, or try something completely different.

At the same time, I decided to take the chance to visit my family in China. Without a job, I could visit for a longer period of time (otherwise I could only get 2 wks paid vacation). I remember my mom mentioned during one of her visits to China she had met a master of woodblock printing (雕版印刷/diaoban yinshua). It was the first form of printing invented, they would carve out pages of text (or images), put ink over top, then print it onto paper:

This was even earlier than movable type printing (活字印刷/huozi yinshua) where each character was printed on a separate block so you could arrange them as needed:

This master's workshop took in apprentices and would offer free housing and food. After a certain amount of time, once the apprentices' work reached a certain level, they were even given a salary for their work.

I thought that sounded like a great plan. I didn't explicitly come to China with the goal of finding a place to do an apprenticeship, but I was aware this sort of opportunity was available, and it aligned with my interest in Chinese history and culture.

When I arrived in China last year I spent a few months visiting my dad and other family, before I ended up in Yangzhou.

There were some emotional ups and downs in between, I did find a woodblock printing master, I started to learn a bit with him, it didn't work out, etc., etc. But essentially I found myself in Yangzhou with nothing to do.

Yangzhou is quite famous for Guqin (there's an entire street here dedicated to selling Guqin...although it's a bit of a tourist trap ^^;;) , and I thought I could find a teacher to learn how to play the instrument at least. I had bought a Guqin years ago in Canada, but was always too busy/lazy to actually learn/practice it, but now being free everyday I decided I could do some sort of intense course. While scrolling through the Red Note app looking for Guqin teachers I came across a post of a teacher looking for students to learn how to make+play Guqin, with the option to live at the workshop and have housing and food covered:

And my eyes lit up.

That was how it all started :D

The biggest obstacle is honestly some family members. Growing up abroad, I've never really had a close relationship with any of my relatives in China. I've also never had to navigate the complicated family relations that Chinese families can sometimes have. If I were to go to any other country in the world to learn something, none of them would say anything, I don't think they'd even think about it, but because I'm in China a lot of them suddenly feel they need to express an opinion about my decisions, lol. Some don't like my interest in wearing Hanfu, some think I'm crazy learning something that "no one else these days is interested in", some think I'm immature/irresponsible not finding a 'regular' job and 'wasting' my time. Luckily, none of them live in Yangzhou so aside from a passive-aggressive text message/phone call once in awhile I can do my own thing 😁💖

[tiramiiswu]

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ Invincible x Tharja!Reader

✦ masterlist || next ✦ imagine: mark with a dark mage reader inspired by tharja from fire emblem awakening, aka mark and the freak who follows him everywhere they possibly can and casts curses on people who inconvenience them ✦ pairings: mark grayson x tharja!reader ✦ warnings: slight yandere behavior, stalking, reader is a little freak sometimes ✦ a/n: the inevitable tharja!reader imagine i keep babbling about :3 i love my wife she's so silly 💞😊also sorry if this jumps around a lot i like, worked on this infrequently and mostly whenever a brain worm started wriggling i had to get it out of my system i dont really know when to stop

✦ you might be into him because he's attractive or maybe you're just fascinated by his strength or general trauma spiral, sometimes you just follow him like a little stalker because you find him so fascinating for some reason

✦ you like the way you are for sure, it's less so that you don't see anything wrong with your behavior (you're definitely aware enough to know what you're doing is odd) and more so like, this is kind of just how you are and you don’t really see a point in changing

✦ but if mark ever mentioned like her creepy stalker/dark mage behavior being weird or wishing you were like more normal you would both like, understand you needs to change your approach but also lack the social clues to do this in a way that isnt fucking insane

✦ like you don't really understand that he finds you weird, that your tendencies to stalk him and watch him when you think he isn't paying attention, you just think your approach is wrong and that you should try to be As Normal As Possible (in the most bizarre fashion)

✦ you're usually pretty gloomy and monotone so you try to sound and act generally cheerier and upbeat but also uh, you tend to say a lot of weird things

✦ like your phrasing is just kind of Off and Weirdly iterated, you sound old fashioned but in a like, medieval sense

✦ Like you start to greet him specifically with “how fare you” and “good morrow sir” and say “huzzah!” at the end of some of your sentences and none of it sounds right, like it’s just odd and archaic sounding and Extremely Unlike You

✦ At some point mark is even more weirded out by your attempts at being normal that he just, straight up asks you to go back to the way you were before he decided he can put up with your usual strange, gloomy self better than this friendlier side of you

✦ mark starts to notice when tharja!reader is stalking him, it’s never inherently malevolent or out to get him or his loved ones, you're just like, creepy in general

✦ he doesnt have to worry about you trying to hurt him despite your past as a goon of some bigger, more threatening villain

✦ you're reformed and relatively loyal to him and the guardians (at least up until the team splits, then it's pretty clear that you're only really following where he goes)

✦ you're mostly just a lurker

✦ you're fascinated with him in a way you can’t specifically explain, but you fully believe you were destined to meet and tends to speak to him like the two of you are star crossed lovers of some kind

✦ idk if you'd like, go as far as following him to his house that’s insane work even for you, but at places like the gda or the guardian's hq and even during some of his assignments at some point mark would just start to feel you staring at him from somewhere behind him or within the vicinity

✦ you really aren't being that slick with it tbh

✦ yes sometimes you're peering around corners and watching him without him knowing but sometimes someone can just, walk up to see what you're doing and it’s clear as day just watching mark do Literally Anything

✦ you always manage to appear when he’s in the middle of doing something, even if he’s with company

✦ whether it’s walking in to ask cecil a question during one of his training sessions or even just suddenly appearing during casual conversations he’s having with the guardians

✦ it becomes very evident to everyone that you're always going to be lurking somewhere nearby if mark is there

✦ at some point it might become like? comforting? (at least in a stockholm syndrome kind of way)

✦ you become more reliable in combat if you can manage to keep up with him somehow (you're mostly grounded and you don't have very great stamina tbh but you can manage on your own) you do well to watch his flank if you're not in immediate danger, glass cannon and all depending on your opponent’s resistance to magic

✦ but like idk tharja!reader’s head over heels in love with him and isnt opposed to lending an ear or a shoulder to cry on, you just aren’t exactly the first person you’d think to turn to for comfort

✦ i think he’s keeping you at an arm’s length because regardless you're fucking weird but like

✦ idk i want them to have their tharja/robin moment where after getting used to your antics and somewhat comfortable at the idea of you watching over him/taking care of him he feels you watching again and like

✦ reaches out and pulls around the corner you're hiding behind just like, “i mean, i guess an easier way for you to keep doing all this is to just keep you by my side forever or something”

✦ but for now instead of marrying you he'll just like, ask you out on a date

✦ and while you would accept this bc you were almost like? waiting for it, in very tharja fashion you would just be like, “hm, this is wrong, turn back around” and make him ask you again (you still said yes dw)

✦ you're not actually used to him like, looking at you directly

✦ he thinks it's kind of cute in a way that you get kind of shy when he's actually speaking to you face to face

✦ he notices you actually don’t like making eye contact with a lot of people in general, it’s rare to see you actually speak to someone while looking at them dead in the eyes you tend to look down or generally avert your gaze to focus on something else during conversations

✦ cecil probably couldve had you on a tighter leash if he started letting you monitor the graysons with him

✦ 10/10 if someone gave you the job you’d dedicate enough of your time away from studying dark magic and worshiping the fell god to stalk mark on a government paycheck

✦ that’s implying you even like cecil tbh

✦ you honestly couldnt care less what he actually wants to get out of it, you barely listen to him most of the time you're on parole anyway

✦ tbh you could develop a much better hex to keep tabs on mark and his family than whatever cecil’s system is, you just likes doing it yourself

✦ when mark isn’t there for you to shadow? you're holed up in some quiet dark room to practice your dark magic

✦ whether it be studying old texts of rituals and curses or just like, practicing a hex that can change the color of her curtains temporarily

✦ because you're not just practicing spells that are for combat, you're practicing minor hexes for simply just convenience’s sake, or

✦ like yeah you can cast a spell that has to inflict pain onto someone else to replenish your strength and stamina, sure you can sap the life force of another person to heal your wounds or trap someone in a pool of corrosive mire from a few yards away

✦ but what do you actually practice and study the most in you spare time?

✦ developing a new spell to relieve the aches and pains in you feet after you walk in heels, or a hex to help regulate your body temperature just enough to avoid shivering or feeling that prickling sensation from the room being just a bit too warm, sometimes it's just developing a quick charm to take your makeup off at the end of the night because you just couldn't be bothered to go through your whole routine that night

✦ you aren't always trying to cause harm

✦ well, okay except when you're trying to get out of having to see cecil because you Really Don’t Feel Like It and decide to put a curse on him so he gets sick or mildly injured so you can miss your meeting (this has caused him to add more time to whatever deal the two of you made in relation to not sending you to jail)

✦ like not enough to leave him severely harmed of course but like, leave him with a bad cold or maybe like a sprained ankle

✦ something that inconveniences him so he can reschedule and so you can just go back to your books or so you can watch mark in person

✦ this goes for quite a few of the guardians actually

✦ like i mentioned before you'd probably be a reformed villain, like not actually reformed like you had a change of heart and suddenly wanted to do good

✦ but because the villain you worked for was about to get apprehended or killed and you switched teams because you realized you were on the losing side and decided throwing your life away for some crazy mf who doesn't care about you wasn't worth it

✦ you're still not opposed to killing someone if you need to, mark didn’t approve of it though so you've been reeling in your more lethal spells (which was uh, most of them if you're being honest)

✦ it’s taken a bit but you're gradually starting to become more merciful and sparing your opponents from severe bodily harm in an attempt to gain mark’s approval

✦ you'd offer your help to anyone besides mark almost begrudgingly

✦ like you asked for this tbh

✦ you agreed to join the side of the good guys maybe even the gda with some deal with cecil or whatever sure, but you're not going out of your way to interact with your new "teammates"

✦ they always manage to find a way to butt into your business somehow, like you just cant escape them

✦ at some point it's like you're stuck being their therapist at times

✦ like there's something about you that makes people just kind of talk out loud about their problems around you or the universe just has the most impeccable comedic timing when it comes to you walking into a room when someone has a personal issue

✦ like you don't know how to make it any more clear how much you don't really care but like, for whatever reason you decide to offer your assistance (probably just to get them to stop talking)

✦ your methods would be fucking wild and unconventional as hell tho

✦ like oh, mark is still traumatized and conflicted over his feelings about his dad trying to conquer the earth? simple, you’ll just spend a couple of days working on like a whole ritual or concoct some elaborate spell or curse to place on him that will erase his memories of his dad entirely to get rid of the source of the problem like??

✦ it could definitely be a plausible solution (you had the courtesy of offering it to him and waiting for permission to use that spell and he definitely said no ofc) but who the fuck would think of that first???

✦ honestly you'd probably get along with robot decently well

✦ like who else would tharja!reader find kinship with than the fucking weirdo who literally stole his coworker's dna to seem more appealing to his crush? what a fucking freak (you definitely wondered if mark would like you more if you suddenly became ginger or something)

✦ tharja!reader likes to pretend that they're not interested in forming bonds and attachments with others except for mark, but he’s seen how you sit and observe people before offering a solution to their problems

✦ you don’t actively seek out friendship with anyone but he sees how much you try to just like, exist, to prove yourself as trustworthy to the other heroes who hold you at an arm’s length

✦ you tend to be othered due to your track record being a former villain, or because your personality isn’t the most approachable and how you're kind of off putting because your hobbies are strange and how your solutions to problems are extreme at times

✦ like he sees how you get defensive when you think they question your loyalty or judge your practices

✦ you have a tendency to get catty or make snide comments either at others or say something self deprecating about yourself to make a point

✦ you tend to shrug it off as just being honest or realistic, but it’s apparent that it’s starting to get under your skin how much you get treated like a time bomb

✦ he genuinely considers for a moment that you might’ve cursed him

✦ you didn’t btw however everyone definitely thinks you did based on the fact that mark is? actually looking for you now? like willingly?? what the fuck??

✦ like he just cannot stop thinking about you it’s genuinely driving him mad like at first it was because yeah you’re always near him or watching him ofc he’s going to think about you constantly you never leave him alone

✦ but now he’s like, up at night thinking of you sometimes, maybe hugging his pillow to his chest and kicking his feet a little

✦ at some point you aren’t even there and he passes by a shop that has like pretty notebooks or like a black cat or crow plushie in the window and he thinks about you or how you would probably like something like it and maybe he even buys it for himself

✦ if mark ever feels like tharja!reader is like, trustworthy or loyal enough to him (with some stipulations) he might introduce you to his family

✦ you would oddly be mostly disinterested in his family but like, hey, a win’s a win you gets to go to his house and lurk in his room, life is good

✦ depending on when you're invited over mark doesn’t have to worry much about you reporting back to cecil about oliver because you're like

✦ actively avoiding the kid

✦ you look at him like he’s a little creature

✦ like not specifically because he’s an alien or because his skin is purple, but because he’s a child

✦ you don't want any of his kiddy germs on you

✦ mark thinks it’s funny how much you stiffen up when oliver walks over to you

✦ like the way you shuffle further away from him when sitting on the couch and the little sounds of panic/defeat you make when inevitably little toddler oliver corners you and starts like patting your leg or trying to crawl or climb over you

✦ you look so miffed by oliver being curious it's so silly

✦ sometimes you make a minor illusion of like a butterfly or some small glowing image to lure him away so you can escape, or just so he won't hover around you when you're trying to converse with mark or debbie (the graysons finding your efforts to entertain oliver quite silly and endearing in an odd way)

✦ mark pretends not to see you working quietly on making an amulet that can help disguise oliver/change his appearance with a transmog to help debbie save money on whatever foundation or face paint she uses to hide his alien skin

✦ he thinks it’s cute that when oliver’s still pretty young you tend to talk to him like he’s an adult, seeing you holding your amulet up to him and with a rather serious frown explaining to the boy the importance of keeping the pendant unharmed and intact in order for the enchantment to work

✦ the sigh you let out when he inevitably ends up teething on the pendant before giving him the ever so slightly affectionate tug on his cheek is something mark thinks about quite often after that

✦ you don't particularly like being touched by people, but with mark? you're like a cat, you slink around and start to cling to his side or creep up behind him and just sort of like, press into his back and hold onto his waist or shoulders

✦ neither of you have really noticed yet but the two of you both sort of take turns like, watching the other sleep when you're together

✦ whether it be looming over him when he's napping or staring at his face when the two of you fall asleep side by side, you find the peaceful, helpless look on his face when he's vulnerable just oh so mesmerizing

✦ on the other hand whenever you actually managed to fall asleep first beside or on top of him (or sometimes when he finds you slumped over your books, a hex dancing along your fingers to your pen to scrawl across your notes while snoozing in your chair) mark can’t help but find the relaxed expression on your face so… enchanting

✦ it’s corny mark’s so fucking corny but genuinely it’s like you put a spell on him

✦ which tbh is highly probable, like sometimes you put a hex on him during combat to spike his adrenaline for a few seconds or block a pain receptor or two every now and then (maybe even crank up his libido or something idk whatever this little freak wants)

✦ but this time you definitely didn’t do that

✦ last minute addendum mostly unrelated to that last part but this now implies the existence of noire whose father is mark

✦ and that her like bipolar mood swings/personality switches are being influenced by fucking viltrumite genetic strength,,,,,, girl is gonna get a crit and shout “blood and thunder!” and rip a man in half omg

✦ i think they’ve created a monster and by they i ofc mean me this might get a pin put in it i will be scheming about father candidate mark now

[bleue-flora]

can you explain why you're so obsessed with diminishing the abuse and torture cdream faced in the prison? you come off as if you don't think he's valid as victim.

[context]

Heh?… have you read my other posts? Or my fanfiction lol? cuz uhhh……. if you actually think that is what I was doing versus just revealing some interesting lore details then you are very mistaken. I mean the [post] I literally put up before reading this I hope alone highlights that.

Honestly, I was just annoyed the other night while making a fun prison arc montage when I noticed how I had way more clips of Techno being hurt by Quackity then I did of Dream.

(this is all of Dream’s & around half of Techno’s)

I mean I hope you’re new around here because I’ve literally done analysis on which tools Quackity used [post] [post] [post] [post], I’ve compared the length of prison vs other big events [post] to point out how truly awful it was, I’ve compared visitors of exile and prison [post] to point out his isolation, I’ve written essays on the cruelty of prison here’s just one [post], I’ve put together a summary sheet and title detailing Dream’s stay in prison [post], I’ve looked at how many times Sam might have hit Dream [post], I’ve highlighted how abusive the cell in itself was [post] [post] especially for someone who’s autistic [post], I’ve noted how potions may not have been used [post], I even have a 15 chapter fanfiction [fic] dedicated to what I think could be plausible canon (and unhinged) torture visits, and I’ve posted a total of 28 prison arc torture scenes in my various works and on here... I mean I feel like the most blatant takeaway from my blog and fanfiction is that prison was such utter unjust cruelty.

And yes I do love looking at the lore and streams and finding cool details, but just because I’m pointing out interesting things from the few visits we get doesn’t mean I’m diminishing his torture or abuse. I’m just looking at the lore and sharing something I found while making a fun video. Now, I do think that Dream was stronger willed and such than is often portrayed [post], but that doesn’t mean I don’t think he hasn’t suffered. I’m just looking at the facts and they highlight how Dream tried to take weapons, accused, hit, shouted, and argued with his torturer from visit 1 to visit 83. So, just because he faces immense abuse and torture does not mean I think he is pathetic and I think that’s a fair assessment considering the lore we get, even if it is an unpopular one. But also, as I’ve pointed out before, we only get 3 scenes (2 of which are impartial), a few images, a montage, a few descriptions in dialogue of what happened in those 83 torture visits, not to mention what could have happened in the whole 314 days of the prison arc. So there are a lot of unknowns and a lot of implications and assumptions we can make…. anyways I digress…

I’d hardly say I’m obsessed with diminishing his abuse and torture, if anything I’d hope it’s obvious that I’m really obsessed with pointing out how horrible it was and noting ways how it was even worse than we realize. Of course, I see him as a valid victim, I’d even argue he is The victim. That to quote Techno:

“No man has ever suffered as much as Dream.” [clip]

[stellargh0ul]

Could I have some reader cockwarming Copia after they had a bad & stressful day? (Totally not self indulgent)

you would not believe how much of my writing in these prompts is just excuses to be self-indulgent. you're good, dove.

-

his hands run gently through your hair as you curl in his lap, petting through the strands in slow, rhythmic motions. you don’t say anything, but you feel his chest move like he’s about to- and then he falls silent once more.

you’re grateful. you don’t know what you would have responded with had he asked you a question or said something, but you aren’t fully sure it would have been coherent.

it isn’t just the cock sitting inside you- though that’s part of it, of course.

it’s just that your day had been utter shit, from the moment you woke up in the morning to the moment you walked into Frater Imperator’s office and wordlessly climbed into his lap.

the scratching of his pen on paper resumes and you close your eyes once more, leaning forward on him to lay your head on his shoulder. Copia’s head moves slightly, turning to press a kiss to the side of your head, but otherwise the two of you are still for a long moment.

it had taken a bit, to get to that point, of course. ever the gentleman, he’d insisted on fingering you open before he’d allow you to take his cock, something which you’d protested as unnecessary. but you were overruled.

and even before that, he’d gone down a long list of things he could possibly do to make you feel better before arriving at cockwarming: drawing you a nice bath, serenading you with a song meant only for your ears, cooking your favorite for dinner rather than eating at the ministry cafeteria…

nothing had sounded like enough to your ears. you weren’t so much feeling overwhelmed as you were feeling disconnected: from the world, from your duties, and from the very people around you.

and so, what better way to feel connected once more than to literally be connected together as he finished up his work?

you’re very nearly asleep by the time he puts his pen down once more and his hand comes up to stroke your back.

“cara,” he murmurs in your ear. “I’m finished with work. how do you… how do you want to do this?”

experimentally, he moves inside you for the first time since the pair of you had settled into this position and you groan a little as the motion pushes him just a tiny bit deeper.

“I don’t know,” you say. “I don’t��� want to be separated.”

even the few minutes it would take for him to collect himself and the pair of you to walk to your chambers feels like too long for you to be apart right now.

“…hm.”

his hands trace patterns on your back and you hold tight to the grip you have around his neck, his body the anchor keeping you grounded in a world that felt so utterly foreign to you right now.

“…we can sit here as long as we need,” Copia says, after a time, and it’s in the face of his love that a few tears finally begin to fall.

[wistericaine]

date day | mattheo riddle

rockstar!mattheo x reader | chaotic fluff | wc: 860

summary: mattheo and you go on your first date

“And you’re sure you don’t want anything?”

You looked up at Mattheo. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, you’re faking a relationship with me for what seems like no reason.” he murmured. You could tell that there was a hint of confusion in his voice. “Wouldn’t you want something out of it?”

You shrugged simply. “It seems fun.”

“So are you doing this for fun, then?” he asked confusedly. 

You shrugged. “Why not?”

You couldn’t quite put your finger on it other than just adding a bit of spice of life. You didn’t want money or anything directly—nothing more than just the experience.

“What kind of things do you like, then?” he asked you.

Mattheo and you were both standing near a hotdog stand. There was a rather large bite hanging out of your mouth, sauce dripping back down to the hotdog wrapping. The two of you had exchanged numbers just last night, organizing for a hangout the next day. Mattheo hadn’t been able to talk much when he got home—but he had been talking quite a bit this morning. 

Then again, there was only so much that you could learn about someone in less than a day.

“For what, a date?” you asked him. 

He nodded, hand moving to wipe just beside your mouth. “You have sauce by your mouth.”

You rolled your eyes playfully before looking around the plaza. There were fun activities around that the two of you could do if you wanted. A wreck room near the end of the west side or the escape room alley on the east. The thing that caught your eye the most though was a laser tag arena just a couple of steps away from the both of you. 

“Laser tag.” you said finally. 

Mattheo looked at you with a curious expression, a smirk forming on his face. “Laser tag?”

“Yup.” you nodded. You were already making your way to the arena, finishing your hotdog and tossing the wrapping. There wasn’t a single word that was going to stop you from playing laser tag, whether he wanted to or not. 

You could hear him chuckling in the background before his footsteps caught up to you. “Any particular reason for laser tag?”

“Teamwork!” you said excitedly as the both of you walked inside. “We’ll make code names and develop a strategy together. And if we work together, I’ll reward you with a kiss.”

That seemed to get another eyebrow raise out of him. “A kiss?”

“What, you don’t want to kiss from me?” you teased him.

“I figured that you would want to build some rapport first.” he chuckled, though you could tell there was something more genuine hiding in there. 

You looked over at him with a deadpan expression. “I literally agreed to date you for PR without even knowing your name. I think rapport has been thrown out of the window here.”

“Fair enough.” he said. “Which arena do you want?”

“Okay Nommington, we’re going in!”

“When are you ever going to stop calling me that?” Mattheo grumbled out loud, laser gun in hand as the two of you stood at your tower.

The both of you had decided to play duo mode with five other couples—which made for eight other players that you two had to eliminate. While you had partly explained to Mattheo that you wanted to test your teamwork skills together, you also knew that it ran just a bit deeper than that. As chaotic as you were, you didn’t quite want to fake date someone who made everything extremely boring.

“When we stop playing this.” you said simply, gun pointed at one of the opponents. “One down!”

“And another.” Mattheo said. You noticed the way that his face was drawn into a deep focus—brow furrowed just enough to show how laser-focused he truly was. Ironic, given the ‘laser-tag’ environment. 

The two of you made your way through the arena—avoiding one laser tag attack after another while you eliminated the other teams. Mattheo had even moved you out of the way one time to take a hit for you, though you had pulled him out just as quick. His laser had hit the person shooting even quicker than the both of you had moved.

The scoreboard was glowing green in just under ten minutes, the lights turning back on as your names were displayed on the leaderboard for the most hits.

“We won!” you said excitedly, jumping up and down before looking at him. “You’re rather good at this.”

He shrugged. “You get good at aiming after a bit.”

“Bit of what?” you asked him with a smirk. 

“Fans tossing their bras at you.” he deadpanned—a laugh bubbling out of your throat almost as soon as he said it. “I’m being serious!”

“Seriously?” you asked him.

“Dead serious.” he said grimly, much more like he was talking about a dead body than his musical tour. 

You rolled your eyes at that, hands wrapping around your arms. “You’re utterly ridiculous.” you laughed—the both of you making your way to the front desk. “Did you want to get some food?”

“Only if we get dessert after.” 

hello everyone, i hope you guys enjoyed! i thought that i would post a couple of snippets before i focus on this series that im working on, so have some rockstar!mattheo <3 thanks so much for reading!

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© wistericaine 2025. do not copy, translate or claim any of my works as your own. reblogs + comments are so very appreciated!

[yansurnummu]

Critiquing the Construction of Cipher's Midden

AKA "Why Can't Hermaeus Mora, In His Infinite Knowledge, Teach These Poor Nerds Some Basic Joinery Techniques"

Being back in Apocrypha replaying these quests after what, 2 years now? Got me actually looking around and looking at some details in a few houses (for fic purposes, of course) and then once I started doing that, being a woodworking aficionado with some construction experience myself, I couldn't help noticing a few things.

(Disclaimer that this is just for fun and not meant to be ripping on the actual ESO devs who did a great job of creating some really great environments and set pieces)

Unsupported beams: Putting beams across an otherwise open roof situation like this will add rigidity to the structure, but uh. They've gotta actually be attached to the frame. To have it just stuck to the interior panels like that is concerning. Honestly, from this point on, I'm just assuming any circular beams are purely a decorative choice because they just don't make sense otherwise.

Mystery Gaps: This is only the beginning for these particular beams. They will become a recurring theme. it's actually fairly common in modern-day construction to have multiple thinner pieces of wood (like 2x4s for example) stacked together like this to create support beams as this is usually a more cost-effective option than something like 4x4 hardwood and isn't really significantly less strong. but having 1-2 inch gaps between them is ???? not that bad I guess but just why? You're only making more work for yourself.

Missed Connections: If we're assuming these beams are carried over from the outside, then these oddly-spaced, doubled-up beams are likely what's supporting the eaves of the roof. That's not good! Leramil, your study's gonna blow over in a stiff breeze! Always carry your load-bearing beams across the frame!

This is Fine: well, it's not fine, it's probably not helping with insulation in here, but structurally it's not a big deal, just a bit baffling. It looks like their roofs are built in 3 layers; the boards visible behind the broken parts would be laid down first over the frame, and then the shingles on top, and then this broken shiplap (using that literally here lol) is the interior layer. Note how they don't quite meet up where the frame is.

I have no idea what that metal brace is holding up. Or the ropes. I guess the Ciphers are all just really into shibari or something.

Here we can see that someone among the Ciphers has the skills to actually cut proper joinery. From the look of it, that beam is supported by this round log, which has a joint cut into it to keep it in place. Good job!

And here we can see the ends of those doubled-up beams from the interior.

Decorative Protrusions: So, there is a historical precedent for details like this, but typically they would be supporting the floor of an attic. On the opposite side of this, there's just... wall.

After the nightmare that is the interior, I was interested to see how bad the foundation would be, but honestly? It's pretty solid, assuming the beams are lap jointed (cutting blocks off the beam on the outside and cutting a corner off your beams on the inside so they then fit together and sit flush without the need for nails) Evenly spaced 4x4 beams about a foot apart, this would be great if not for the floorboards running parallel to the beams themselves, and then the odd connections of the posts that serve as the foundation not actually sitting on the frame. So close!

So, canonically, I believe that the Ciphers get most of their material salvaged from Fathom's Drift, which makes things like this doorframe actually make a decent amount of sense. These long, curved beams could feasibly have been part of a ship's hull once, and I think that's a pretty cool touch.

Now, onto the walkways:

a suspension bridge without a railing is just a springboard for co-workers you hate. bonus points for the tripping hazard to make extra sure you faceplant on the ground below.

I have no words for this railing. the nice thing about it is, assuming all those rods are dowelled into the boards beneath them, this could actually work out if they properly connected the rail itself. which it doesn't seem like they have, if the mix of nails and rope is anything to go by.

Before I finish this, I just wanna take a quick look at some furniture:

(Yes, I know these are technically the rustic High Isle set, but I'm doing them anyway)

Really the only issue I have with this table and chair set is that the seat of the chair is covered in nails. Don't do that. You've already used dowels on the back, just use them to connect the seat as well. Or if you have to use nails, you can sink them down further and then plug them with something. (I'm sure there's a tamriel equivalent of wood filler, it's basically just sawdust and adhesive) Otherwise these are both pretty solid and well built.

The chair back is a little interesting though. It's pretty common for chairs to be built with tennon joints (basically the vertical pieces have niches carved into them, and the horizontal slats either have the ends tapered, or carved away entirely to sit flush with the other piece) but the visible dowels are a little weird and probably not doing anything structurally. I guess it could be an aesthetic choice.

TL;DR:

Most of this place would absolutely not pass a building inspection. These choices vary from dangerous to just kind of weird, and the Ciphers should probably find a new carpenter.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk <3

[mkm543]

Summary: You needed extra driving practice, so you asked your childhood friend Matt if he could teach you not expecting the outcome after.

Driving Lessons

It was about time you got your license, but you needed practice of course. You didn’t really have anyone to help you, your mom doesn’t know how to drive, your dad is always busy at work and you don’t have any older siblings. 

So you decided to ask a childhood friend of yours, Matt Sturniolo. You’ve always had a small crush on him but you never knew if he did as well so you never told him anything. You asked him for some driving lessons this Saturday which he agreed to immediately. No one will ever know but you jumped with excitement at his confirmation. 

The day came, Saturday 3:00 pm, Matt was gonna give you some lessons. He picked you up at your house and drove off to an empty parking lot. On the way there you were expressing to him how excited yet nervous you were to finally be able to drive. He then responded with, “Yeah I know, you get to have so much freedom. Like when I finally got mine, I was able to literally go wherever the fuck I wanted but then I became an uber driver to Nick and Chris.” 

That last part made you laugh because you knew how much his brothers made him drive them everywhere. Matt arrived at the empty parking lot and put the car in park when he turned to you, “You ready?” in such a sweet tone it made your heart melt. With a grin on your face you responded, “Yes.” 

Matt got out of the car and switched places with you. You got into the driver's seat and immediately adjusted the seat to your height, considering Matt was quite taller than you. He got into the passenger seat and giggled a bit seeing you having to change the seat while putting on his seat belt. 

“Alright, so you know where the brakes and gas pedals are right?” He asked in a soft tone which you said yes to while showing him where they were. “Okay good, where are the blinkers?” you turned them both on, left and right. 

“Good now check the mirrors, make sure you’re able to see on the sides of the car and here-” he pointed at the rearview mirror. “Make sure you’re able to see through the back window.” You did as he said and checked the mirrors. You were adjusting the rear view mirror when he gently grabbed your wrist that was by the mirror and said, “Now sweetheart, make sure your head is facing towards the road before you do that so you know how it’s going to look when you are driving.” 

“Ohh smart” you responded while doing just that. He then went on making sure you knew where certain things were and what they did. “Alrighty, you’re all set” he stated. You put your foot on the brake to switch the gear to drive when he noticed something and stopped you, “Hey missy you’re missing something-” he said while putting his hand on the gear on top of yours. 

Your heart started to flutter and your cheeks turned a light shade of red from the physical contact between the two of you. You looked at him all confused when he then pointed at your upper body, “Where’s your seatbelt sweetheart?” You got embarrassed instinctively, how did you forget the most important step of driving? Probably because you were busy thinking of the handsome boy beside you. 

“Oh my god, how the fuck did I forget that?” you said laughing at yourself while putting it on. “It’s okay, you’re still learning just don’t forget next time okay?” he calmly stated while looking you in the eye making your heart race. 

“Let’s try this again” he takes his hand off yours so you can start driving. You put your foot on the brake to shift the gear to drive. “Now, don’t hit the gas just yet, only when I tell you alright sweetheart?” you nodded. “Take your foot off the brake and go straight and stop by that tree” he signaled a tree that was about 15 feet ahead. 

“Yes sir” you said back in a joking manner causing a giggle from him. You took your foot off the brake and went forward just like he told you to. “Good, you’re doing very well Y/N, press the gas a little bit” he praised you. 

You got to the tree and pressed on the brake to stop the car smoothly. “Very good. Now you’re going to keep going until you get to that stop sign and you’re going to turn left for me okay?” You nodded in return doing as you’re told. 

You were getting close to the stop sign when Matt said, “Now when you get to a stop sign, you’re going to make a complete stop for at least 3 seconds and look both ways to make sure there aren’t any cars coming.” 

You got to the stop sign, made a complete stop, turned your blinker on and looked both ways. You made sure there weren't any cars coming and then you turned to the left. A small smile started to appear on Matt’s face, he was very proud. “Very good Y/N. Now you’re going to do the same over there but turn right this time.”

“Okay” you said in a happy tone, knowing you were impressing Matt with your driving skills. After, he kept telling you to do the same things for a while so you could get the hang of it. You didn’t really notice but he kept giving you a few glances here and there with a grin on his face.

“Alright sweetheart, put the car in park for me” you did just that. “Now, you’re going to reverse okay. What you’re going to do is put your left hand at the top of the steering wheel and make sure it’s straight.” he said while putting his index and middle finger on top of the wheel, you put your left hand there and gave him your full attention. 

“You’re going to put all your weight onto your right thigh while putting your right arm across the back of my seat to look out the back window okay?” he stated while putting your right arm behind the passenger seat. 

“When you reverse, you’re going to want to look at the back window and the side mirror as well, can you do that for me?” “Yes I can sir” he smiled at the name you just called him, blushing a little. “Also, when you are going to reverse, make sure you get into the position before you take your foot off the brake okay?” you nodded back, he then gave you green light to reverse the car. 

You put the car in reverse, got into the position and then took your foot off the break. Matt was watching you carefully, making sure you’re doing it correctly while also checking you out a little. You did just like he said, looking through the back window and side mirrors. 

“Good girl-” he said barely above a whisper, thinking you didn’t hear him but you did. Your stomach immediately got filled with butterflies, your cheeks got red, but you still tried your best to concentrate. 

After about 30 seconds, Matt told you to stop. You hit the brake and went back to normal position. “Put the car in park for me sweetheart” he calmly demanded. “Now you’re going to park right there okay?” he said while signaling where exactly he wanted you to park. 

You realized that there’s a car parked right beside the space Matt wanted you to be in. You got nervous, what if you accidentally hit the car? He could tell you tensed up, so he gently started rubbing your shoulder to help you calm down. 

“Hey Y/N, it’s okay. You've been doing very good so far.” he comforted you. “How ‘bout this, instead park next to the one I just said where there’s no cars.” He looked at you with his ocean eyes that always made your heart drop to the ground, especially with the way he’s looking and talking to you.

You turned to meet his gaze and you nodded. The two of you stared for a while causing some tension before Matt pulled away and directed you to park in the empty space. You put the car in drive and started to turn the car into the parking spot Matt assigned you. 

“Sweetheart, make sure you’re not stepping on the white lines when you go in. If you are, you reverse and align yourself properly okay?” he sweetly stated to you. “Yes sir-” Matt couldn’t hide the fact that he liked being called that by you. Everytime you said it to him, it made him blush, butterflies would fill in his stomach, and he would start to feel restricted in a certain area. 

You did as you’re told, you went in the spot slowly. Matt then told you to check if you were inside the white lines which you did by opening the door. You realized you were, just a little though. “Oops-” you said while closing the door. “Don’t worry about it, reverse and fix it. Also make sure there aren't any cars coming.” 

You put the car in reverse, got into the position and took your foot off the brake. You didn’t notice but the top part of your camisole shirt was starting to drag down, revealing your cleavage a little. Matt noticed it of course, I mean it was basically right by his face due to the position you were in. 

He couldn’t help himself and look but tried to be as respectful as possible, he didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable. After reversing, you went ahead and aligned the car in between the white lines on the ground. You put the car in park and turned to the boy beside you, “So Mr. Sturniolo, how did I do?” you asked jokingly even though you really hoped you did well.

He looked at you, “Honestly Y/N, you did so well, I’m honestly surprised. Not that I thought you’d be bad, but from what you told me you haven't practiced that much. Very very good, I'm impressed-” he replied with a grin on his face, applauding you. 

You blushed so hard you’d swear they looked like a tomato, you were so happy Matt was not only proud but impressed. You then jokingly tossed your hair around and said, “Thank you, thank you. I know, I know I’m the best-” you both bursted out laughing. 

“Hey, how about I reward you for being such a good listener and student tonight? Wanna go get dinner?” Matt asked you in a flirtatious yet subtle manner, indicating he was serious. You were flabbergasted at the fact that he just asked you out, of course you’re not going to let this opportunity down. 

“Oh my god yes I’d love to!” you tried so hard to hide the humongous smile on your face but Matt saw right through it, seeing how happy you were at his question. “Alright, let me take you home first.” You both switched seats, you were now in the passenger seat and he was in the driver's seat. 

He took you home and before you opened the door to leave he gently grabbed your thigh and said, “I’ll pick you up around 7:30, wear something nice okay? It’s going to be a surprise-” he winked at you. The physical contact alone made you feel like you were in the clouds making the statement that just came out of his mouth causing you to be in heaven. 

You looked at him and responded with, “Okay I will” in a tone that let Matt know how excited you were. He smiled back as you got out of the car and basically sprinted to your house. Matt made sure you got inside before he drove off. 

You ran to your room and rummaged through your closet to find something to wear tonight. You came across your black skims dress that highlighted your curves so well, “perfect.”

You got all dolled up and it was time for Matt to pick you up. You got a notification and saw Matt texted you that he was outside. You jumped for joy, you are actually going on a date with your childhood crush. 

You went downstairs, opened the door and saw his car parked right at the end of your driveway. He saw you walk towards him and he was mesmerized; you looked stunning! The most beautiful girl he’s ever seen. 

You got in the car, Matt couldn’t keep his eyes off you. “What?” you asked with a smile on your face while blushing a little. “You’re so beautiful Y/N” he went to reach for your hand and kissed the top of it. 

Butterflies were racing around in a messy figure 8 in your stomach. You couldn’t believe what was happening, it all felt like a dream. Matt drove off to the surprise spot he wanted to take you. 

The whole time you two were cracking jokes, flirting here and there, having a good time. It was so good you didn’t want it to end. As you guys were leaving, Matt gently placed his hand on your lower back, leading you the way to the car. 

He opened the door for you while holding your hand. On his way around the car, he was thinking a million things he wanted to do with you, licking his lips and letting his imagination go wild. Matt got in the driver’s seat, he still couldn’t keep his eyes off you. 

You eventually noticed the way he was looking at you with a mesmerized yet hungry look on his face. You jokingly said, “What you wanna fuck me?” while giggling. Matt looked at you with desperation in his eyes, “Yes please-” 

You couldn't believe what you just heard, your eyes widened so much you felt like they were about to pop out of your head. You didn’t expect him to actually say yes, but who are you to stop him? 

You gave him a look which indicated everything he needed to know. The two of you got in the back seat, let’s just say things got steamy.

xoxo - m.e

[moki-dokie]

and, as another layer of this shit sundae, i am already underpaid considerably. like, 10k/yr below what i ought to be making with my experience and position. i've been fine with that because we are an extremely small company/start-up and that kinda comes with the territory. also, oklahoma is hella cheap so i can get by on a lower income pretty fine.

and, again, this comes with start-up territory, i do about 5 different jobs at once on any given day. all of us do. it's gotten worse over the last 2 years though as we've had to lay off about half of the company yet still trying to run it that just isn't possible with a less than skeleton crew.

even after securing one hell of a lucrative deal with R*, we are still fucking floundering and can't bail out or get a good enough investor or make enough of a profit. ceo has been in panic mode for at least a year with no fucking direction and just throwing shit out in hopes something might stick but also quadrupling the work load of everyone. ceo is also the most underqualified asshat in existance and has no fucking right to be calling himself a ceo because he isn't an executive in any fucking capacity. 10 years my junior, no college education whatsoever, no work experience outside of running this company, and his only real guidance has been a few leadership classes here and there. he has lucked his way through the last decade and that luck has run dry. i have been screaming for the last FOUR years at HR (which is useless bc it's contracted and its run by a friend of the ceo so. yeah.) that the ceo is the problem. all of our turnover comes back to him. all of our operational problems comes back to him. he is singlehandedly driving the company straight into the ground and like every techbro on the fucking planet, cannot take five minutes to step back and consider that he is wrong and unfit and needs to hand off his position to someone qualified.

we are still a start-up after 12 years. we aren't *starting* shit anymore. the core leadership are the three co-founders who collectively have no idea how to run a business but are nonetheless good at pretending they do. they have never secured stable funding. they have never been profitable enough to do the things they're trying to do. it's only been this past year that they've gotten so desperate that they finally put their egos aside a BIT to take advice from the rest of the team. too little too late, though.

ceo has completely and utterly eroded my trust and goodwill over the years after throwing my department under the bus far too many times. i have 0 faith the company will last another two years, shaky faith that it lasts even 1 more year. i have 0 faith we'll ever get the back pay we were promised upon taking pay cuts.

on top of explicitly telling them i do not want this position on multiple occasions (trust me, it's not that i'm a good fit and they want me for it, its because they have literally no other choice), i know it's something i'm not capable of handling besides. i'm not remotely interested in upper management and i know i can't operate the way they need me to in order to succeed at it and i don't want to stress myself tf out trying just for the sake of it when we're in a sinking fucking ship. as i told my manager, if that weren't the case and there was even a glimmer of hope on the horizon, i might be more willing to tough it out and give it a shot. as it is, not only is it not worth my stress, but i just don't give a shit enough. there is quite literally nothing in it for me at this point other than some experience that ultimately doesn't mean shit.

i'm told that, well, its alright if you don't like it! You can always step down! to which i say - step down into WHAT position? you're getting rid of mine, so it'd be into the demotion -> layoff path, which ends up being the exact same ultimatum. I'm told that, well, we won't throw you to the wolves! it's okay if you fuck up a little, we'll help. to which i say - that isn't fucking possible when you *just* gave me an unjustified final warning write-up a month ago that'll be on record for 6 mo minimum. one single fuck-up more and I'm out. not that they need a reason at all, because like most of the nation oklahoma is at-will employment so as long as it isn't discrimination related your ass can be fired for any ol reason.

i have been given the shaft more times than i can count in my tenure here. ceo and i have butted heads enough times that i simply refuse to talk to him unless it's fucking necessary because i'm two seconds from ripping his head off at any given moment. since at least 2020, leadership has been trying to get rid of me in a way that simply cannot be contested (not that i would, i've tried that before and it's fucking pointless in at-will states) but i'm a fucking cockroach and i survive the shit they pull. you might be thinking WHY the fuck haven't i moved on? well, 1) i am my own boss 99% of the time 2) I am completely remote 3) we have the most generous PTO of any company i've *ever* worked for 4) we are super lax about people utilizing that generous PTO whenever and however they want 5) the health insurance is actually pretty damn good 6) i decide my own work hours and schedule and 7) because i legitimately liked doing the job we were doing for quite a long time and i still do at its core and now that AI has sucked human interaction out of customer support i take extra pride in my team and 8) despite being paid well under the industry standard, it's well above literally anything else i could make elsewhere in the state, because oklahoma is a broke ass ho with a job market in the dumpster and i live minimum 30 minutes away from where jobs would be besides and 9) without a fucking degree, which i do not have, all of my experience is utterly worthless to 90% of the job market and especially fucking resume-fielding algorithms and 10) bro i'm mid-30s in middle management customer service which is being rapidly wiped from the job market as a whole with some not-insignificant medical issues that are easily used against me without triggering any sort of technical discrimination. basically, this is as good as it gets for me where i am now. that, however, is changing.

but since i'm about to be in california, in a very walkable city, with a very good job market and overall better employer mentality, my options are expanding. i could also jump ship to a competitor, which i'm heavily considering. the problem there is that this industry is so fucking small that all the ceos and leadership teams know each other, and i know from experience that they shit talk the employees they don't like amongst each other and circumvent laws asking about employment by just talking to each other as friends. so, eh, it's a risk but its a risk i'm considering too. all things considered, this came at a pretty good time. i think they honestly counted on backing me into a corner, not realizing i had an escape route that *just* opened up.

anyway. there's 6 years of my life wasted. i'm tired and i'm stressed and i'm angry.

work: so your choices are take the promotion, or take a demotion and then lay-off

me: hm. k. so how much is the pay raise for the promotion?

work: well. about that. there isn't one

me:

work:

me: so. you just. expect me to take on more work and more responsibility when i've already been working under a pay cut for the last 7 months?

work: well, what else would you do?

me: hm, gee, i don't know, maybe NOT take any extra work on at all actually and just be demoted since I'm already at that pay grade?

work:

me:

work: okay but see you're holding yourself back here. are you really willing to face being laid off over challenging yourself?

me: yeah actually i'm very willing to do exactly that

work:....alright lets talk some more tomorrow

[mercymaker]

bruv comparison is truly the mind killer like damn...

[psychopomp-namine]

@lyd1adeetzz I am always happy to talk about the twins lol. replying through a reblog because... word count.

I've already talked about it at length here though, so I'll just copy paste the parts relevant to this post:

which is why I think post-reconstruction ima is so fascinating because it happens at the point where he has already accepted kako as an equal and he tries to be less overbearing. at the same time, he gained a new body, and there are hints that he actually shares some memories with sirei. I think, given their backstory, ima already had a complicated relationship with his body (and the reconstruction just adds more on top of that), but ultimately, ima-as-sirei allows him that extra physical distance from kako. he, quite literally, had to become a person outside of “kako’s twin brother” and “kako’s protector.” he no longer looks like kako nor can he even use hemoanima or even just fight at all. but ima without his kako responsibilities? he doesn’t know who that person is. so he assumes the role sirei once did. and I think that, because he was enjoying pretending to be sirei (and everyone else was fine with it) it allowed him to finally make connections with other people during the prologue. like he was REALLY into being a commanding officer and planning the excursion and actually helping drive the plot forward, figuring out the mysteries. he gets to do things and show more of his personality that aren’t strictly about/for kako! he’s contrarian and strategic and observant and plans for the worst case scenarios. maybe he actually shares an interest in mystery solving with kako, but he would have never known that as an inherent desire for himself. in any other situation, he’d be convinced that he probably likes it because kako likes it, and anything kako likes is good. you don’t really start to know the non-kako side of ima until very late into the first 100 days. maybe ima himself didn’t know either

in essence, ima-as-sirei could have been an interesting way to explore ima's identity (or truly, his lack thereof). ima defines himself as "kako's twin" and "kako's protector" and "the sibling that takes on all the shameful work so kako can remain pure and innocent and safe" and all of that is taken away from him without his consent. without that, he has to actually... figure out his own identity.

and also just, on a practical level. we know that ima takes care of his appearances because of his work. when he gets sirei's body, not only is he unable to protect kako physically, he also:

is in a position where he can do nothing but trust that kako can take care of herself and that kako will protect him (since he cannot use the revive-o-matic)

no longer has a body that is tied to his previous work, so any hangups he has over that (and he probably has many of them) is something he can perhaps try to untangle since the sirei body puts an additional distance to all of that

but that also means that, if he had survived the war, I just know ima was already thinking about, "okay what's my next job gonna be to provide for kako? how can I be useful in this body?"

if he has sirei's body, sure he doesn't have to go back to his old work, but he might also be forever tied to military work. which also isn't really good?

this situation also begs the question: if they switched places, would ima have asked yugamu to reconstruct kako?

plus, ima grew up distrusting adults. so I think he got a kick out of being the commanding officer to his senpais lol. and I mean, he was doing a pretty good job, all things considered! so, good for him!

we even see the effects of this too. when ima-as-sirei was coming up with the plan and selecting who would check out the base, he was okay with kako staying at the academy and being separated from her. he actually talks to other people without bringing up kako every 5 minutes. (minor spoilers for coming of age ->) in coa, during the slumber party, ima said he actually enjoyed it since he didn't really have any friends. so like. him just starting to have interpersonal connections with other people he's also starting to care about, even if it's through "mission work," is already a huge step for him.

it also hints a little bit about kako's own thoughts on their relationship. I think it's easy to fall into the idea the she wants to be free of their previous dynamic for her own personal independence, but what she wants is for ima to be free of his self-imposed duty. and, more importantly, she can also be selfish about ima (<- said without any judgement). like, she could have let ima die. ima would have been fine staying dead if it means kako lives for another day. but he lives another day, as sirei.

kako said something like, (non-verbatim) "if he wakes up and doesn't like it, I'll kill him myself" which is such an interesting characterization moment for her. I mean yeah, ima would be totally fine with kako killing him too, but let's think about this. is there ever a reality where ima will tell kako that he hates that she asked him to be reconstructed?

we might never know what ima actually thinks about this, because he'll always say that he's okay with it if kako is happy. and he'll believe his own words. and maybe he is genuinely okay with it! but given their backstory... I think ima having body autonomy issues is quite likely. "your body is a product" and all that. selling your body, forced body modification... it's whatever. to ima, those are the cards he's dealt with. and he's gonna deflect and be nonchalant and just accept that this is his lot in life. which, idk. is very sad to me.

of course, all this character exploration never really happens because, well. yeah. but I think ima-as-sirei could have been an interesting first step for ima to think about what it means to be his own person. which, at the end of the day, is all kako wants for him.

// route 0 spoilers

people saying "lol remember when they turned ima into sirei. what was that about" and I'm just here gritting my teeth so I don't join the conversation but it matters!! they didn't explore it too deeply but ima kinda needed to be forced into that!! and it gave kako depth!! oughhh I'm going insanse... is this what eito defenders feel like about their blorbo. I wish they actually explored this more and how ima-as-sirei changed their relationship in subtle ways, but unfortunately takumi doesn't really care lol, so why would they

[laugtherhyena]

Playlist listened to while writing; https://spotify.link/WzxvdTKBCJb

Holy shit dude, the ceo of rei angst wrote some rei angst what the HELL!! We have to kill her guys she cant keep getting away with this.

Anyways im gonna be writing about a lot of these nerds. I just love rei. This is really rushed and I am really sleepy so it is not my best writing.

Also i cannot write teruya so you will habe to ppppUT UP WITH IT.

Warnings for like. Violence and my attempt at writing a breakdown.

-

Rei held the rusty pipe like a baseball bat, swinging for a homerun as she smacked off the head of someone she once knew. Someone who had abandoned her long ago.

The rotting head of what used to be her mother rolled on the ground, sickly green skin squishing against the ground and stared up at her with lifeless eyes.

“I didn’t want to see you again like this,” Rei hissed as her chest heaved, “i wanted to see you staring with regret as you saw your daughter on top of the world. I didn’t want to kill you or see you dead.”

That had been the second time she had run into her zombified mother. The first, she had been a coward, unable to kill her and her father– the two people she hated most, the two people who had abandoned her and left her on the streets.

Where had all her rage gone that time. When had she become soft.

-

Midori clung to Ryutaro with all the strength in her frail body. “My brother,” she whispered, “i saw my brother’s corpse down there. Kakeru… he… they got Kakeru… they killed Kakeu…”

He didn’t say much in return, but he did pat her hand briefly– the only comforting action he could manage while carrying her.

“I see a store up ahead. Let’s stop by there for supplies.” Keisuke pointed out to the leader of the bunch.

Setsuka patted the clown on the back and gave him a smile. “Sounds good, lead the way. Maki, do you need me to carry Yamaguchi for a bit?”

Midori wrapped her arms and legs around Ryutaro a bit tighter at the suggestion, very much attached to the guy who had found her and saved her from zombies.

“I’ll be fine until we reach the stop.” The blonde nodded his acknowledgement to the bluenette, forcing a smile as he struggled to catch up.

The group walked in silence for a bit, the only sounds being the orchestra of distant zombie groans.

“Miss Yamaguchi,” Hikaru said after bit, his tone fatherly like usual, “may I check your pulse soon? And may I check if the swelling on your ankles has gone down?”

“Yeah, that… sounds good. Thank you, Uncle.”

-

Kanata removed the bandages from Ayame’s arm gradually.

“There isn’t any sign of infection, Hatano. Kinjo and Maki are still out, so… uhm… can I get you something to eat?” The surgeon spoke softly as she stared at the sprinter.

“I’m not hungry…” Ayame mumbled.

“Inori!” Tomori slammed the door open, her eyes sunken from lack of sleep, “i think i got bit. Check! Check, please!!”

Kanata bit back a sigh of exasperation and forced out her cheerful smile. “Of course. Where do you think you were bit this time?”

“My ankle. They went after my ankle so I couldn’t run! They’re going to eat me. I’m going to die, aren’t I? Oh, god, I’m going to die!” The cheerleader’s words were jumbled together and practically nonsensical. She grabbed onto Kanata’s shoulders as she spoke, her nails digging into the other’s lab coat and pressing her skin uncomfortably.

“Miss Tomori,” Kanata winced, “please let go of me. I will check your ankle, but I am sure you are fine.”

“I’m not fine!” Kizuna wailed before glaring accusatory daggers at Ayame. “If you… if you hadn't gotten yourself bitten! If you had just seen that bitch for what she is! We wouldnt be doomed! You’ve doomed us all!”

Ayame took the words without fighting back. What had been the point in fighting anymore? Kizuna was right. She had doomed them all.

“Miss Tomori, please… Taira had us all fooled… if Miss Hatano is to blame, then so are the rest of us…” the blonde murmured. “Please sit down so I can check your ankle…”

-

Mindless. Kinji was mindless. His faith had only been able to spare him for so long.

His teeth were decayed now. His skin was green and purple and yellow. His eyes were dull. His cheeks were sunken.

It was incredible that his mind stayed intact long enough for him to bury as many as he did. The only bodies he didn’t put 6 feet under, the only bodies he couldn’t handle burying, were those of the people he knew.

But what was the point?

-

Yuki held his stomach as he choked up and spat out the last meal he had, beans that had barelt even begun to digest.

“Urgh… gross…” he mumbled to himself.

Shinji was away at the moment, scouting out for the next safe place for them to go and likely trying to find his family in the process.

The lucky student fought back envious tears. At least they knew there was a chance that Shinji’s family was alive– they found his mother, Aiko, brutally murdered in the Maeda household. Her corpse was bloated and rotted when they found it.

The sight still haunted his dreams. He couldn’t even keep.meals down since he saw it.

-

Mikako peered into her brother’s lab. He hadn’t eaten in quite some time, nor had he slept.

“Yamato…” she whispered hesitantly.

He spun around with a dart ready in his hand. He only lowered it after he registered it was her.

“Mikako, I’ve told you to leave me alone. I need to find a cure, or no one will be safe.” The inventor turned back to his work and threw a crumpled up piece of paper to the side.

“I’m sure someone else is searching for a cure, Yamato. Why not try to make a vaccine? Some sort of immunity would help while someone else finds a cure.” The exorcist suggested.

Her brother didn’t seem to have heard. That, or he was ignoring her.

“Ah… nevermind.” She straightened her back and spun on her heel to hunt down their other classmates.

For the newcomers, Satsuki was putting on a performance– juggling empty bottles and broken gadgets whilst telling jokes. That could not be safe, but Haruhiko seemed to have his eyes on her.

The bunker door heaved open, and Teruya’s team came in, carrying boxes full of food and other supplies.

“We’re back with dinner!” The merchant shouted.

Mikako rushed over to take the box from him.

“Thank you, Otori, this should be good for at least a week. You and your scavenger team did good.”

He grinned at her and handed his box over. “Thanks! We uh…” he hesitated, “We saw Taira and Maeda… err… Utsuro? On our flight back… they looked like they were heading somewhere… dunno where…”

She bit her tongue and nodded thankfully at him. “Thank you for telling me.”

-

Thats it. Im hungry good bye.

Aw yeah infection Au moment! I do remember you saying a while back that you wanted to write something about Rei in this Au and MAN her part has gotta be my favorite out of these little snippets.

I really like taking a look at how a bunch of the cast is doing, seeing the way you wrote them in those situations was pretty fun! It reminded me how much i like the idea of Setsuka's like group with the 6.5 cast and how Kanata probably wishes she has a degree in psychology to properly deal with Ayame and Kizuna (she may feel as if she's not doing enough for them seing as her kindness can only bring her so far when dealing with their turmoil)

[ponyatowski]

so ive been to london for the (kindof) very first time as a conscious human being and man it is like. i can’t articulate all the feelings ive been having but its making me REALLY emo because Wow heres a city that seemingly works!

[bonestrouslingbones]

found yet another picrew and accidentally made stretch so pretty i have to punch a hole in the wall

[fingertipsmp3]

Things that happened in my sims game today that ✨just make sense✨

-My sim went on a date with his stalker