#whatever you do... the answer is anything that shows you some new stuff to learn/lets you review or practice some stuff you've seen

[rigelmejo]

I'm sure if this applies to you, then you've already figured it out. But just in case. If you are contemplating learning Japanese, starting to study Japanese, I highly recommend you look up 'how to learn a language' generally when you come up with your study plan. Or taking a beginner Japanese class in a school, or on a MOOC like Coursera. Or getting a textbook, and starting with that.

Just because, it would be a good idea to get a sense of what it is going to take to learn a language to the degree you wish to for your goals. Whatever goals those are: to pass the JLPT N1, to work in a specific company that requires a certain proficiency at specific skills, to read manga, to watch shows, to talk conversationally with people, to go to university in Japan, etc. It would be a good idea to look up in general, what things do you study in any language, to reach those goals. Which is generally reading, writing, speaking, listening, to different amounts of skill level (depending on your goals).

It's a good idea to get a sense of your personal goals, and the general things that need to be learned to reach those goals, before digging into what other learners of Japanese are doing.

Because...

1. There's a lot of people trying to sell products, or classes, who may not align with your personal goals, or may not teach all the skills you personally need to study to reach your personal goals.

2. There's a lot of people saying the way they studied is the ONLY good way to study, and many of these people will contradict each other... which can leave you confused about which is 'better' and what to do. The answer of course is, do what works for you. It may be what someone else is doing, or someone else, or what no one else is doing.

3. It may discourage you to see a lot of other beginners asking what to do, and also confused about the conflicting study plans and paid resources they're running into.

4. It's easy to get distracted, trying to chase the 'new best study method/study material' if you're constantly being marketed to, constantly being told X person studied Y way and it's 'better.' Consistency long term is your friend, consistency over time is how you'll make progress on your goals. Restarting study from the same beginner material, over and over, could just delay your progress. Find something that works for you, and stick with it.

Good enough IS good enough. You don't have to be perfect. You don't have to keep searching until you 'find' the perfect study method, or study materials. I know it's easy to fall into perfectionism. It's okay to not be a perfectionist. It's okay to do something good enough, that's working good enough, and just consistently do it.

[cobragardens]

Notes on the Scene in Job's Basement

Crowley is not tempting Aziraphale here. He's experimenting on him.

Getting Aziraphale to sin, or even getting him drunk, is not Crowley's intent in this scene. Eating food, taking pleasure in food, drinking alcohol, and even being drunk are not sins in most of Judaism or Christianity (and they're certainly not sins in British Christianity, regardless of any church's doctrine). When Aziraphale turns down alcohol, Crowley just suggests he try food instead; so it's not important to Crowley what Aziraphale tries, but it is important to him that he try something.

This scene is also the first time (chronologically) we see that Crowley likes to drink and likes to be drunk.

We know from

and from

as well as from Book Omens and Word of God that angels have no instinct beyond curiosity pulling them toward eating or toward gender. From this we can reasonably presume they have no instinct toward Beverages either.

That means that in this moment--

--Crowley is very likely the only metaphysical entity he knows on either side of the divide, or even knows of, who has ever experienced a physical pleasure.

And he probably has some Lingering Questions about it, like we all did the first time a physical pleasure blew our minds. Like,

Is it this strong for everyone?

Is there something wrong with me?

Am I going to hurt myself if I do this, like, a lot?

And it's not like the poor creature can ask anyone, because the answers for humans aren't necessarily going to apply to him.

So when he sees an opportunity, Crowley gets that one angel he knows who'll talk to him to try a human thing, and then he watches to see if physical pleasure hits the angel as hard as it hit him.

And that's why he looks so creepily pleased when it does.

Apparently it is this strong for everyone and there isn't anything wrong with him. Now he can relax and get sloshed without worrying, and he even has someone to talk to about how rad human stuff is.

A Dip Into Speculation

We know because we're shown this isn't the first time Crowley has gotten drunk that, watching Aziraphale, Crowley understands what he's seeing. I think it's really interesting that Crowley doesn't laugh at Aziraphale at any point during this scene, and he doesn't correct the way he's eating, either.

Maybe it's because this is what it was like for Crowley the first time. Maybe he got so drunk he passed out and woke up in a puddle of his own sick. Maybe he got so drunk he passed out and didn't wake up at all, and there was Paperwork and he had to get used to a whole new corporation just when he'd got the hang of having legs in the old one. Maybe somebody had to show him how to use a fork or whatever they had going on for eating utensils in Ancient Mesopotamia. I distinctly remember having to learn as a small child to chew with my mouth closed. There is every possibility Crowley doesn't consider the way Aziraphale is eating to be worthy of ridicule because whatever Crowley did the first time was worse.

Maybe he wants to leave Aziraphale set up for later embarrassment over his table manners. Aziraphale was a judgy bitch about the wine.

Or maybe it's something like Let him have this one. There can be rules to it later; let him just enjoy it, once, like a little kid with both fists in their birthday cake.

Maybe it's desire. There is some textual evidence for this. Once Aziraphale learns to eat properly, the way he does it is very attractive, and we know Crowley loves watching him do it.

I don't think it's overreaching even to interpret David Tennant's physical performance of Crowley watching Aziraphale eat as one of sensual or erotic pleasure. I mean--

I'm not saying it absolutely has to be erotic, but it's not a reach, or even a full extension of the elbow, to read it that way.

There's another meta somewhere [I'll link it when I find it again; if you know this meta, please drop it in comments!] that discusses how this exchange in Job's basement is filmed like an erotic scene.

Like Crowley, we all want to kiss this face.

Aziraphale isn't eating prettily, but he's eating lewdly, ravenously, desirously, and it's lit like romantic sex, not like gluttony. Whether that's funny or poignant or hot may depend on the viewer. Here's how Crowley's handling it:

Srs tho, any frame of this scene could have been painted by Artemisia Gentileschi.

Or maybe--and this is my favorite of the available interpretations--maybe this is what it was like for Crowley the first time and he doesn't interfere because he wants Aziraphale to come out of this as someone who's had the same experience Crowley's had so Crowley won't be so totally alone in having had it.

[oopsiedaisydeer]

𝘥𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦’𝘴 𝘢 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘪𝘮?

ɪɴ ᴡʜɪᴄʜ…20ᴛʜᴄᴇɴᴛᴜʀʏɢɪʀʟ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ᴛᴀᴋᴇꜱ ᴏɴᴇ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ

Unfortunately for Iris, Y/n had no classes with Matt. Fortunately for Iris, Y/n had perfect visibility of him in P.E. class while she was upstairs in History every Thursday during the period before lunch.

Glancing down, she watches a particularly average game of soccer being played, and yet, she shoots out of her chair when she sees Matt being tripped up by another guy. Chris immediately rushes over, and he helps Matt up, the latter hobbling from the impact to his knee. Knowing what she must do, but also acting on pure instinct and camaraderie, she clutches her stomach. Her male teacher pales in the face as soon as she mentions her “cramps” and quickly ushers her out of the classroom.

Once in the nurse’s office, her eyes immediately flick to Matt sitting on one of the beds, propping his knee up. He looks uncomfortable, but not seriously injured. She’d just hang around, act casual, and hope he didn’t notice her too much. It wouldn’t be hard. Right? If anyone had the chance to overhear anything about him and his interests, it was going to be her. For Iris’s sake, of course.

The nurse isn’t there, so she leans against the wall by the door, pretending to be in pain, but really just observing the scene unfolding before her.

“Hey,” Matt murmurs, his fingers absently drumming on the side of the bed. “I, I was thinking maybe I’ll try the newspaper thing. Could be interesting, right?”

Her heartbeat increases. She hadn’t expected Matt to bring up joining a club at all, much less suggest it himself.

Chris glances up at him, clearly surprised. “No way. You? A club? Thought you’d be the last guy to go for that.”

Matt shrugs, looking somewhat conflicted but also intrigued. “I don’t know. I’ve been thinking about writing lately. Maybe it’d be good for me. I could write about sports stuff, or whatever. It’s just...I don’t know...I mean, I’ve never really been the ‘join a club’ type, but it could be interesting, right?”

Chris chuckles. “Dude, you won’t know until you try. Besides, if you do it, I might just have to tag along. You know, for photo stuff.”

Matt looks over at Chris, raising an eyebrow. “Photo stuff?”

“Yeah, man. I was thinking about giving it a shot. I don’t know anything about photography, but it could be fun, right?”

Matt grins, the nervousness seeming to lift from his shoulders. “You? A photographer? That would be a sight to see.”

Chris shrugs nonchalantly. “Hey, don’t knock it until you try it. Besides, cameras seem pretty cool.”

Matt stays silent for a moment, mulling it over, and then lets out a sigh. “I guess... I guess I’ll show up for the first meeting tomorrow. It can’t hurt, right? I’ll just go and see what it’s like.”

Y/n watches from her spot near the door, the cogs in her brain turning. Matt was actually considering it. He’d decided to try something new out. This was good. She'd made it this far, and if he actually went through with it, she might have the opportunity to learn more about him. For Iris’s sake, once again.

She quietly slips out of the nurse’s office. He was going to show up tomorrow. She had to be ready, so she prepared a quick mental backstory for why she was joining, in case anyone asked. The fact that her real answer was because of a guy filled her with disgust, but she quickly recovered by reminding herself this was for Iris.

The next day, when she arrives at the trial session for the school newspaper, she sees Matt. He’s hesitant, shifting from foot to foot, looking out of place but still there. Chris, ever aloof, stands beside him, seemingly lost in thought. Y/n keeps her distance, observing Matt from across the room. 

The room is filled with a small handful of unfamiliar faces, some eager and others clearly unsure about why they’d even shown up. A senior, a girl with an unflappable sense of enthusiasm, stands in front, claps her hands together to grab everyone's attention.

"Alright! Hey, everyone! So glad to see you all here for the first meeting of the year. Let’s go around in a circle and introduce ourselves and share what you’re interested in doing for the paper. Don’t be shy!"

She grimaces inwardly. She really wasn’t here to talk, but she doesn’t have much of a choice. As the introductions begin, she’s relieved that everyone else seems equally unsure about what they’re doing. When it’s her turn, she stands up straight and fakes an eager smile, not wanting to reveal how she’d rather be...well, not here.

“Hi, I��m Y/n,” she says, her voice steady. “I’m mostly just here to figure out what this is all about. I’d like to maybe do interviews, or whatever. I’ll see how it goes.”

She sits back down, trying to make herself as small as possible. The next few people share their interests, some more enthusiastic than others. Then it’s Chris’s turn. He stands up, hands shoved in his pockets, leaning casually against the desk.

“Chris. I’m here to try my hand at photography. I don’t know much about it yet, but I thought I’d give it a shot.”

A few people nod, but Y/n notices that Matt is still looking down, fidgeting with his hands. When it’s his turn, he hesitates before standing up. His voice is soft, almost unsure.

“I’m Matt,” he starts, glancing briefly at Chris. “I... I think I want to join to write about sports and culture, maybe. But... I doubt I’d be any good at it. I’ll just... see what the first meeting’s like.”

There’s a moment of silence as he sits down, and then Matt shifts uncomfortably, clearly looking for a way out. His gaze darts around the room, and the tension is palpable. She watches him closely, her mind racing with how she might use this opportunity for Iris.

After a couple of minutes of the senior girl rambling on, Matt whispers to Chris, who nods but doesn’t look at him. He stands and gives a half-hearted glance at Chris before quietly heading for the door, determined not to make a big deal of his exit. Chris turns inconspicuously to gaze at the door after his brother leaves.

She switches her focus to Chris, scrutinising him. He seems unfazed by Matt’s sudden exit. He leans back in his chair, as if this is all just another normal day.

“Well,” she mutters to herself, “that went well.”

Once the introductions are finished, the teacher goes over the basic logistics of the paper and asks everyone to pair up for future assignments. She hands out slips of paper with names written on them.

Y/n looks down at her slip and finds that she’s paired with Chris. She raises an eyebrow, not believing her luck, after all, what’s closer to Matt than his brother? The room empties out, and she sees Chris heading for the door. She hesitates for a moment, then follows him, determined to at least try to talk to him, to make the most out of them working together. For Iris’s sake.

“Hey, uh, Chris?” she calls out, catching up to him as he walks through the hallway.

He glances over his shoulder, eyebrow raised. “What’s up?”

“I guess we’re partners?” she attempts to say enthusiastically, but the words come out more uncertain than she intended. She stops in front of him, feeling the awkwardness of the situation. “Guess we're stuck together? I mean, it’s fine, I just—uh, I wanted to introduce myself again and just make sure we were on the same page.”

Chris shrugs, his expression not changing much. “Yeah, I guess we are.” He looks her over briefly, his gaze drifting somewhere else, distracted by something further down the hallway. 

Y/n nods, doing her best to get the conversation back on track. “I was thinking we could plan out our first assignment. Maybe split up some of the tasks? I can handle the research—”

Chris cuts her off, sounding bored. “I don’t know, okay I’ll just take care of the photos. Or whatever.”

She stares at him for a second, unsure how to push the conversation further. That’s it? Just like that? Guess he wasn’t in the mood to talk.

This wasn’t going how she planned. Maybe she was too eager. Or maybe it was just...

“Well,” she says, “I’ll see you around.”

Chris glances at her, an almost unreadable expression on his face. “Yeah. Sure.”

He turns and walks off, leaving her standing there, feeling like she’d just failed at some sort of social exchange. Whatever. She wasn’t gonna chase after him. She sighs, heading in the opposite direction. Maybe this is all there was to it. Matt couldn’t even bother sticking to it, and now Chris was giving her…nothing.

It felt like a waste of time, chasing this Sturniolo guy around. Then again, it wasn’t about her, not really. It was all for Iris. And yet, somehow she found herself questioning how much effort was too much, and how much of it was for nothing.

creds to @bernardsbendystraws 4 da dividers mwah

a/n: woah matt's arrived. and so has chris. dk how i feel tbh.

taglist: @snoopychris @chrissweetheart @sturnsrecord @sturns-mermaid @slxt4chriss @blushsturns comment to be added/removed from this au's taglist!

till next time!!

[written-in-flowers]

Lovesick: Chan x Male!Reader Pt 12

Pairing: Bang Chan x Male!Reader | Side pairings: Minho x Chan, Minho x Male!Reader (unrequited)

Word Count: 13k

Genre: Horror, Angst, Smut | AU: Yandere!au, Videogame!AU, Highschool!AU

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

Summary: After being sucked into the dating simulator "Lovesick", Park YN has to defeat five rivals to reach his goal. However, he soon learns his rivals aren't the only thing he must contend with for Chan's love.

Tags: Graphic depictions of violence, Main Character Death, dark fic, dead dove: do not eat, yandere behaviors, yandere!reader, stalking, murder/violence, blood and violence, toxic relationships, mentions of murder, unrequited love, mentions of domestic violence, school massacre/genocide, implied teacher/student relationship, homophobic parents, mentions of bullying/trauma, obsession, possessiveness, manipulation, high school setting, anal sex, anal fingering, edging, eventual smut, pool sex, locker room sex, blowjobs, choking, sex toys, mutual masturbation

A/N: PLEASE READ TAGS BEFORE READING! I'm not responsible for any feelings you end up having because you ignored this warning and the ones above.

Lee Felix: Wednesday < | > Kim Seungmin: Tuesday

****

Kim Seungmin: Monday

Things changed when you woke up. Firstly, your room looked different. No longer all beige and white, someone painted the walls powder blue and switched the bed covers to match. Secondly, your phone was not beside your bed or anywhere in the room. Thirdly, when you opened the bedroom door, you were met with a hallway and staircase. A house. Someone had built you a house. Baby blue walls had pixelated photos going down the staircase, and you stepped on oak wood floors and blue carpet. Carefully, you started downwards to a foyer with two rooms adjacent on either side. You didn't see anyone else. Not even a pet. The new addition made you uneasy. You touched the doorknob and found the answer. 

Chan stood at the end of your driveway, eyes lighting up when you opened the door. He looked the same as before, but you still drooled over him. You had half a mind to drag Chan back into the house, peel off his clothes and touch every naked inch of him. He reminded you of all the boys you met at clubs. You recalled their tattooed bodies and pierced faces. You could still taste some of them on your tongue. They often took you to the dirty bathrooms at shows, pressing you to a graffitied stall as you kissed. If things were different, Chan could be one of those men. He’d be the best of them. 

"Morning," Chan said, his voice still smooth and low. "Sleep well?"

"I did. Are you responsible for, you know, all this?” you asked, gesturing to the neighborhood and the house. 

“Yeah,” he nodded proudly, “I wanted to give you a bit more to explore. I’d planned on doing that with the game, but then everything happened and fucked that up. Do you like it? I could change anything you don’t like.”

“No, no, it’s great,” you said, coming out and meeting him on the sidewalk. “Though, would it kill you to let the player have some customization choices? I’m tired of wearing the school uniform all the time. It could come with, like, special bonus traits or whatever if you want.”

“That sounds awesome,” he replied, nodding as the both of you walked down the street together. “You should see the town. It’s great.”

“You made a town?”

“Yeah. It’s got a cafe, an arcade, a manga shop, a hardware store, a convenience store and a street vendor for snacks,” he said. “I was up all night working on it for you. If you decide to stay, you can have loads of cool stuff to do. I thought of making a carnival or like a pier-boardwalk type place with cool mini games players can play for money or special weapons like a sword or a machine gun.” 

“That could work,” you said, watching him. “I think people would really like that.”

“We can go after swim practice and I’ll show you around.” 

You examined Chan more closely. You gazed down to see the bag slung across Chan's chest. It reminded you of a laptop bag. One of the patches sewn into the top flap caught your attention. You recognized the acid green heart wrapped in barbed wire, hanging above the words 'Wire Heart'. 

"You like Wire Heart?" You remembered the punk band you'd seen play at a local club a few times. 

"Yeah," Chan replied enthusiastically, "They're one of my favorite bands! I bought this patch at their show in Daegu, and then this one," he pointed to an inverted version of the first patch, "When I went to Seoul. I've loved them since I was thirteen, so they hold a special place in my heart."

"Me too! I only saw them live when they used to do shows at this one club back in Incheon, but I was a kid so I didn't have money to get anything."

"That's not a big deal. You liked their music, and that's what's important." He then said, "So, you're from Incheon, then?" 

"Yeah,” you nodded. "You're from…here?" You never stopped to wonder where 'here' was. Lovesick did not have a named location. It was only Whimoon. You didn’t even know if a town was attached. 

"I’m from Australia, actually," he said, "But, I moved to Seoul when my parents split up. My dad got a job here, so we moved while my mom stayed behind. I think that's where I really came into my own, you know?" 

Another odd thing. "Then we're in South Korea?"

“Yeah,” he nodded, “We’re in Whimoon, a small town outside of Seoul. Investors originally said I should stick to an East Asian setting, like Japan and use terms like ‘yandere’ and ‘senpai’. I said those are Japanese terms, and it doesn’t make sense to use them in a South Korean town. I wanted to stick to the basic terms like ‘stalker’ or ‘predator’, since that’s basically what you are. But, they cared more about marketability. I wanted to work with what I was familiar with, and I knew nothing about Japanese culture besides their food. I think that’s where Minho and I differed on the project.”

“Wait…What are you talking about?”

“Minho lied to you, YN.”

You stopped walking, “Please, don’t play word games with me. Tell me the truth without any more cryptic messages. I let yesterday slide because you seemed so happy, but I think after everything I deserve to know things now.”

Chan’s shoulders fell. He stayed silent for a moment, contemplating his next words before turning to face you. “I’m the game.”

“I figured out that much for myself.”

“I was Chan in the real world,” he said, “Before Minho murdered me.”

Shocked, you paused for a moment before saying, “He what?”

“That whole suicide story wasn’t true. The story about him being the game’s creator isn’t true. Minho was a jealous, obsessive, possessive, abusive asshole who murdered me when I tried to leave him,” you heard the anger rising in his voice, but didn’t back away. “He killed my best friend then turned on me. He killed me, and then killed himself because he’s a fucking coward.” He came closer to you, “I then possessed the game. Don’t ask me how it happened or what black magic caused it, but it did. When I woke up, I was here,” he gestured to the street around them, “I was in my own creation. Minho might have helped me with it, but I was the brains behind it. I drew the concept art, the model prototypes, the beta version, the story lines and characters. I created this world. It became a part of me, and when I died, I became a part of it.”

It made sense. Despite everything, his words made sense. “So, who are you?”

“I’m Bahng Chan. Minho locked me away when he won the game the first time. He didn't like that I was upset about getting stabbed to death, and was angry when I rejected him. He decided," he took a deep breath and said, “That he'd lock me up and recreate a Chan who'd do whatever he wanted." 

You then remembered what the game told him about locked files. “You were in those files?”

“I was,” he nodded "For ten years. For ten years, I was this little string of code behind a bunch of encrypted barriers, waiting…just waiting," he breathed deep, "For an escape." He stopped when he was a foot away, “It’s a lot to take in so early in the morning. Let’s get to school and I can tell you more there, if you want.” 

He was right. It was a lot. You continued walking with Chan, mulling over what you’d been told. It sounded on par with the type of behavior Minho exhibited. He’d lied to you twice about how he came to be in the game, tried pushing you into a relationship with him, and then became enraged when you finally rejected him. Seeing his escalation in behavior, you didn't put anything past him.

“I'm such an idiot,” you seethed, hands tightening around your backpack straps. "Why did I not see this coming? I knew what he was and I still fell for it."

“Because he's perfected his act,” Chan said. “It’s how he’s lived this long. He lures people into this false sense of security, and then waits for the right moment to strike." He saw the anger etching into your face. "Don't feel bad. He's gotten very good at what he does."

“Why is he still here in the game?" You snapped, the embarrassment sinking. "If you hate him so much, why not get rid of him?”

“I couldn’t get out of the file. I could manipulate things around him, but not actually hurt him.” He then smiled, striding with confidence as he said, "But, you don’t have to worry about him anymore.” 

“Did you kill him?”

“I infected him with a virus,” he said. “It’ll keep him away.”

“Did it kill him?”

“I can’t really kill him, but I can do to him what he’d done to me. It’s the same thing.”

“So, I don’t have to worry about him anymore?”

“No. I only want you to focus on the game; not Minho. Leave him to me.” 

The both of you went through the school portal, still holding hands. 

“Want to get breakfast with me?” Chan asked once on the other side. “I didn’t get a chance to eat at home, and I’m starving.”

“Sure,” you almost added ‘I’d go anywhere with you’, but didn't. You knew you shouldn’t be so hasty to embrace this new Chan, yet the feeling came. “I could eat.” 

You began walking through the crowd towards the main entrance. You scanned the yard for Seungmin or Chorong. You needed to at least set your plan in motion. You did have several other things on your mind, but eliminating Seungmin took you out of the current situation. You figured Seungmin would be on his way to the Newspaper room to continue his "investigation". You’d reached the front when Chan stopped and smiled.

A few yards away stood Jeongin, who was busy passing out more egg bread. You thought of every subtle hint the freshman had given you. Learning what you knew about Chan, you wondered if Jeongin was another part of the game. Chan left your side, walking over to him.

“-We made them a little bit ago,” you heard Jeongin say as you approached. “They’re extra good!”

“Hello Innie,” Chan spoke fondly, eyes full of love and pride. 

Jeongin froze. He turned around to see Chan, and the tray slipped from his hands. Instant tears welled up in his eyes, shock cementing in his features. He kept looking over Chan over and over again, blinking to see if he'd disappear. When Chan took a step forward, Jeongin rushed at him. 

“Channie!” he cheered, crying into Chan's arms. You watched him clutch Chan tightly, as if afraid he might dissolve into nothing again. “It's you! It's really you! You’re here! You’re here!” You saw his shoulders shaking, and how he buried his face in Chan's neck. It particularly bothered you seeing them this way, but when you drew closer, Jeongin’s words became clearer. “....It hurt so much! It hurt so much and ther-there was nothing I could do!”

“I know, I know,” Chan consoled him, petting his back. 

“He took everything! I couldn't stop him, Channie!”

“I know, but I'm here now. Things are going to go back to how they were,” he said, face in Jeongin’s hair. 

“I want my phone! I want my laptops back! I want my room! He took it from me and stuck me in this NPC body! I want it back!”

His heart wrenching sobs did not alert anyone around them. The two stood embracing for several more seconds before Chan released him. He whispered comforting words as he flattened Jeongin’s hair, then brought him over to you.

“YN, you already know Jeongin, grade 9, right?”

“We've met a few times,” you said, still eyeing the distraught freshman. “You've been working together this whole time?”

“No, but I knew Chan was somewhere. If I was out, that meant he must be out too,” Jeongin sniffed, wiping his nose with his sleeve. “I couldn't say anything out loud because Minho was listening. He would've known my coding had broken if I acted too out of character. When you reconfigured everything and gave the NPCs more autonomy, I sort of woke up? I haven't worked out the details because Minho locked me out of the control room, but I’m assuming that’s what happened.” 

“The control room was yours?”

“YN,” Chan put an arm around Jeongin, “This is the real Bott. He was meant to be your guide throughout the game, who helps you if you get stuck or need information on a student. He was supposed to be a friend who works in the shadows.”

“But Minho-”

“-Minho redesigned me to be an NPC and took over my control room,” Jeongin snapped. “He made it so I couldn’t do what I’m supposed to. I couldn't help the players. I had to watch them die. I had to watch him destroy everything around here.” He started crying again, tears spilling down his cheeks. “This place used to be so beautiful, YN. It was free and comfortable and everyone was happy. Then Minho came and changed everything. He made us his slaves. The NPCs used to have a bit more autonomy back then; players could even change it if they wanted a more realistic experience.”

“But Minho got rid of that, right?”

“He did,” he said through his tears before Chan hugged him closely again. Your heart actually went out to your secretive friend. 

“If it makes you feel better,” you said, stepping forward, “I wouldn’t have made it without your help.”

He sniffled, wiping his nose and cheeks with a handkerchief Chan produced. “It’s what I’m meant to do. I would’ve told you everything if you’d asked. I knew…I knew you were special,” he sniffed back tears, “And you’d freed us. I saw how Minho kept trying to hinder you by kicking you off the canon path, and knew I had to help you.” 

“Well, I would’ve struggled way more without your snack clues.” 

Jeongin smiled gratefully, then Chan spoke. “Be Bott again,” Chan said gently, “And tell me what's going on.”

“Well,” Jeongin took out a phone with a purple case, and typed with shaky fingers, “Seungmin has been sniffing around the bleachers since the police left. He keeps thinking the killer will take their next victim there. Before it was just him, but now he’s got the whole crew following him.” 

You looked ahead and saw Seungmin with the rest of the Newspaper Club. They lined up behind him down the path to the front doors, cameras ready to snap a quick photo. You’re sure they’d capture any suspicious or daming activity now. Dread and a tad annoyance mingled together at the sight of Seungmin on the top step giving out orders. You imagined him directing them to different spots in the school to keep an eye on. If you did anything, it’d have to be during classes when they won’t see you.

“Group project?” Chan joked.

“More like a hunt,” scoffed Jeongin, who wiped his wet cheeks. “He’s been harassing people for information about the disappearances and Hyunjin’s death. He has this crazy idea that they’re all connected somehow, and wants to be the one to catch the culprit.” He looked at you, eyes still puffy, “You gotta watch your back from now on. There’s a rumor he thinks you might be involved since this all happened around the time you showed up.”

“That dick,” you hissed.

“Killing him is not an option here,” Jeongin continued, the three of you walking up into the school towards the canteen area.

“Clearly,” you said. “Doesn’t he have a girlfriend or something to keep him occupied outside of the club?”

“You’d think so, right?” Chan huffed. “With him being so handsome, girls are all over him all the time, but he’s not interested. He cares more about his future career than relationships.”

“You think he’s handsome?”

Chan must have heard the blip of jealousy and said, “Seungmin’s not my type, but I’m not blind. I did create him after all.”

You reached the food truck in the corner of the canteen, and waited in line. “You can go a few routes with Seungmin,” Jeongin continued, “But the canon route is to matchmake him with Do Chorong.”

“Canon route?”

“Yeah, a specific route you take that’ll get you more bonus points in the end,” he said. “Of course, the choice is yours in the end. You could take the risk and kill him, or you could frame him for the crimes. You could electrocute him with the faulty copier in the Newspaper room, poison his morning coffee, kidnap and brainwash a student into killing him for you, kidnap and torture him yourself, take him for ransom for the local gang, hire the local gang to kill him for you, plant drugs on him to get him expelled. Shit, you could’ve just committed genocide and kill everyone in the school until it was just you and Chan-”

“-Okay, okay,” you stopped his roll, laughing, “I get it. I get it. I got options.”

“This is what Bott does,” Chan explained, clapping Jeongin’s shoulder proudly. “He gives you options and advice.” 

“Like, how I could’ve given you tips on body disposal-” Jeongin began, but you stopped him.

“Wait, hold on. I could’ve hired someone else to do it?”

“Or brainwash them,” he shrugged.

“Hyunjin was your way of getting in with his brother, who runs a rival gang in town,” Jeongin said. “You would do him a favor for him, and he’d be indebted to you. When you meet his older brother, you could’ve hired him to do jobs or bought specialty items from him. You could’ve also gone into town and bought weapons from the hardware store or clothes to help boost certain skills.” He paused, “There’s a lot of things Minho kept from you because he wanted you to lose. He’s done it to everyone, and I…I wanted so badly to help them. It’s what I was made for. It was my job to help players get through the game and win their love interest. Games are meant to be won, not lost. Every time he snuck up on them at the last minute tore me apart inside,” he gulped thickly, “It’s why I wanted to help you, but couldn’t. Not the way I would’ve with anyone else.”

“You’re here now,” you grinned softly, “And you’re gonna be a huge help.”

The three of you bought food from the truck and took seats at a table. “What route will you take?” Chan asked, sipping from his cold coffee.

“Matchmaking, I guess?” you said with a shrug. “It’s the least suspicious of them. If people see me talking to Chorong, they won’t think anything of it and move on.”

“Like I said,” Chan began, “It won’t be easy. Seungmin isn’t interested in dating, and Chorong has been buzzing around him. It’ll take a lot of persuasion on Chorong’s end to get him to notice her. Thankfully, you have me and Jeongin.”

“How can you both help?”

“YN,” he said, “I designed the game. I know it better than anyone.”

“Oh yeah?” you challenge playfully, remembering the day before. “Prove it.” 

“Like yesterday in class?” He leaned closer, “I’d love to.”

“Or you could just get us a better breakfast,” Jeongin interrupted before anything happened. 

Chan pulled out a phone from his pocket, typed a few words into it, and a sudden ‘ding’ went off. In front of them, the sandwiches they’d ordered turned into steaming bowls of rice, vegetables and tuna. You took up chopsticks to eat a bit, moaning at the mix of flavors in your mouth. It wasn’t an orgasm, but just as good as in your opinion. You guessed making food appear from nowhere was a developer’s perk.

“Minho might have known how to play and manipulate the game,” he said as he watched you eat, “But I am the game, YN. He could get around me before, but not anymore.”

“And how did that happen exactly? You said you were murdered?”

Chan and Jeongin exchanged a serious look before Chan dug into his own bowl. When he finished chewing, he spoke:

“Minho and I met in our game design class at university. We were both into the same stuff and got on really well. I thought he was cute; he thought I was beautiful. We became friends shortly after meeting, hanging out after class and meeting outside school. I’d love to tell you that we developed a bond so deep it could overcome anything, but that’d be a lie.” He ate another piece and then said, “It was nice in the beginning. Minho was funny, clever, considerate and understanding. He made me feel seen and heard. He listened to all my vents about my life, and appreciated my stories and artwork no matter how dark the content. I felt I could trust him. I slowly started to fall in love with him, and I thought I’d met the person I'd spend my life with.

“But, things changed once we started dating. Minho became more possessive, like I said. He didn’t like me hanging out with friends or going out to places without him. He’d pretend to be cool about it, but I knew he wasn’t. I knew he worried about me cheating on him or doing something behind his back. He was so fucking insecure, oh my God,” he gave a soft laugh. “It was pathetic. I pushed my feelings about it aside because I cared about him so much and understood his fragile self-esteem. My simply saying I loved him didn’t appear to be enough. He didn't trust me. He kept trying to catch me lying to him. He told me it was because he loved me so much, and feared he might lose me. He told me he was the only person who loved me; that nobody would love me more than him. I almost believed him.”

“Almost?”

“He hit me,” Chan said firmly, “Punched me. It happened after I’d gone out with my friend, Changbin, and accidentally left my phone at home. He accused me of cheating, and when I tried defending myself, he punched me. Of course, he apologized later with gifts and fancy dates. I didn’t tell anybody because I still loved him; I excused it as him acting out of anger. I kept making up excuses for him whenever people pointed out the red flags because I didn’t want to be alone again. From then on, whenever I tried leaving or did something he didn’t like, he’d hit me.” 

You reached for his hand, and grasped it. “I’m sorry that happened to you.”

“So am I. It’s what got me killed. Felix, the real Felix, offered me a place to stay when I finally gained courage to leave. I waited for Minho to be at work to start packing my stuff. I don’t know how or when he found out, but Minho came home early. He saw Felix in our living room and freaked out. He…He really lost it.” Chan stopped eating, and gripped the end of his chopsticks. He stared into the bowl to avoid looking at you or Jeongin. “I’d never seen him that way before. He went berserk. He killed Felix first with a pair of scissors. He stabbed him all over the place…It happened so quickly…” He gulped back his tears, “I didn’t know what to do. I should have done something, but I didn’t. I stood there, scared and nearly shitting myself, as my deranged boyfriend murdered my best friend.” You gently squeezed his hand once more, seeing the memory bring tears into Chan’s eyes. 

“We don’t have to talk about that part,” you told him. 

“We can talk about this another time,” said Jeongin. 

Chan shook his head, “No…No, you need to know everything.” He gulped once more, took a breath and said, “He then came at me. He said I was a liar and a cheater. He told me nobody would ever love me the way he did. He told me we’d be together forever and then he shoved the scissors in my stomach.” 

Chan’s face fell and he pushed his food away. You imagined the scene: a tearful Chan, scared and pleading before sharp blades punctured his stomach. It broke your heart to think about. “And you ended up here?”

“I don’t know how, but one minute I’m bleeding on the floor, and the next I’m in the bedroom.”

“The love interest’s bedroom?”

“Yeah. I had been playing around with giving the love interest his own house when I died, and that’s who I became. The game sort of became a thing of its own and it assigned Minho and I roles. Minho was a player, and I was his love interest.”

“Let me guess, he got through easily?”

“He was helping me develop the game, so he knew how to play and win,” Chan said. “He won at the end, trying to apologize for what he’d done, but I didn’t accept it. He’d killed me. He’d taken my life and seriously thought I’d let it slide. When I told him off, he tried erasing me from the game,” he scoffed. “He tried deleting me, but he realized quickly he couldn’t. The game was mine. I’d put my soul into it from the moment I started conceptualizing it, so it chose me over Minho. Since he couldn’t erase me, he went into my files, infected me with a virus and deleted certain parts. He locked me into those protected files and created a new version of me that accepted him. He could keep me and not have to worry about me having feelings for someone else.” 

“He stopped loving you though. He’s been all about me this whole time.”

“Which concerned me the most,” he said. “Minho never liked anyone else before. When I realized he was falling for you, I knew I needed to save you before things got worse. I’m glad you stopped trusting him.” 

“I only thought it was weird that he showed up when he did, and how he seemed too eager to get me to the end,” he admitted. “It was only a suspicion. Him being creepy and possessive didn't exactly make me trust him either.”

“It’s good you kept him at an arm’s distance. He already gets jealous whenever you show interest or favor with me over him. It upset him whenever you avoided kissing him,” Chan said. You felt your cheeks burn realizing that Chan must’ve known about the confession and all the times Minho tried kissing you. “He thinks he can persuade you to stay here in the game when it’s over, fuck you, and then stab you when you’re not looking. If anything, he’d lock you up too and recreate a compliant version instead.” 

“I’d kill him before he did that,” The words left you before you stopped. When Chan turned to look at you, he said, “I don’t…I’ve always felt that, especially when he told me how he felt about me. I thought it was a trick to make me trust him.”

“It only made you distrust him instead.”

“A bit. I kept worrying he might slice my throat when I least expected it or kill me right as I’m getting to the end.”

“I don’t think he’d want to kill you right away, but he’d certainly try it if he thought he was losing you.” 

You started eating again, though the food now felt dry in your mouth. You no longer had an appetite, but ate anyway. You thought about everything Chan told you while you ate. There was no proof behind anything he’d said so far. For all you knew, Chan could be a hologram invented by Minho to trick you or lower your guard. That’d be the sort of thing Minho would do if he wanted your love. Hell, he might be posing as Chan right now, which explains the new makeover.

“You don’t believe me,” he stated with amusement.

“Not saying I don’t,” you began, “But I am in a game where deception and manipulation are the main tactics here.”

Chan and Jeongin grinned. “I told you we’d find a special player one day,” Chan told Jeongin.

"Here,” Jeongin pulled out his phone, “Take a look for yourself.” 

You took the phone and saw it opened a news app. The first page carried a headline reading, “Amatuer Game Developer Murdered!” 

“Bahng Chan and Lee Minho, creators of the popular indie horror game ‘Lovesick: Dating Simulator’ were discovered dead in their Seoul apartment early this morning. Police Detectives state that it’d been a murder-suicide committed by Lee, who killed close friend Lee Felix and Bahng first before turning the knife on himself…” 

“Alright, so he did kill you. Doesn’t explain the rest of the stuff.”

“Tell me how I’m so self-aware then,” he challenged. “Or how Minho is? Would we be this way if we weren’t ghosts living in a video game?”

“Minho could have made you.”

“Minho hates me. I doubt he’d upgrade me for you this late in the game. It’d only distance you from him further.”

“Hm…true.”

You contemplated it while you read the article. It detailed the rumored tumultuous relationship between Minho and Chan. Apparently, neighbors often heard them fighting and close friends recalled Minho exhibiting abusive behaviors. You hoped your death would never be publicized this way. Reading related words, articles about the game and its future were clearly lost with time. 

You came across another article that caught your attention. From the popular tabloid magazine “The Globe” plastered the headline “Local Busan Man Claims Game Is Cursed!”. Underneath, they’d placed a photo of a haggard looking man being guided out of a van with two men dressed in white uniforms. “Choi Kimoon, a grocery store clerk, claims he lost weeks of his life after booting up the video game ‘Lovesick: Dating Simulator’ which sent him into a coma.” You scrolled to find a comment section underneath. One comment linked a Subreddit page titled ‘r/Lovesick'. You pressed on the link that redirected you to the page. Clearly, it’d once been a page where Chan and Minho shared updates and answered questions from fans. Yet, the newest additions were what made you pause. 

“GAME IS CURSED!”

“This game kills people, guys!”

“My cousin played this game and died a few weeks later.”

“This thing’s like that videotape in that one movie. You die a month after playing it.”

“Y’all gotta steer clear of this game! It’s bad news!”

Every post claimed the same. Some users said it happened to their friends or loved ones, but the personal experiences unnerved you. They described similar signs: They all booted up the game and fell asleep during the introduction cutscenes; they’d be launched into the video game universe where they were forced to murder characters to win and go home. It appeared those who died in the game, died in real life. Those who lived woke up from comas in the hospital. You saw comments claiming the game’s creators’ tragic deaths cursed the game forever. They warned people against playing it, but others still asked where they could find digital or hard copies. 

“I’m not sure if I should be scared or intrigued,” you said, reading more comments. “This is insane.”

“People are drawn to the strange and dark,” Jeongin said. “Like, those people who go into haunted houses or listen to supernatural podcasts.”

“Clearly.”

Youtube videos of people playing the “Lovesick Challenge” cropped up next. A young social influencer filmed himself watching the cutscene of the game. He claimed that he planned to debunk the game, calling it a hoax. Gradually, his eyes went out of focus and fell closed before he finally passed out. The reposts did a time skip of the man’s body limp in the chair before a young woman came in and found him. You read the ruthless comments underneath. They denounced the influencer for trying to profit off something that killed people. They said he obviously joined in on the hoax to gain some notoriety. Another related video entitled ``The Curse of Lovesick: Dating Sim” played next. A woman with pink streaked hair sat in front of the camera wearing a face full of dark makeup. 

“Okay, so, in 2010, game designers Bahng Chan and Lee Minho pitched an idea for a horror game, right? In the game, people would play as a ‘yandere’. I don’t know if I’m saying that right or not, but it’s supposed to be like a Japanese archetype that's super focused on one person and will do anything for their love. Anyways, you'd play as this character and have to kill a bunch of people to get your man. They pitched this idea to loads of companies, but a lot of them were like ‘No, this game’s too violent’ or ‘No, this game’s not what people want right now.’ Chan and Minho then started their own gaming company called Stray Games, and their first release was ‘Lovesick: Dating Simulator’. They worked on it for months, releasing concept art, sneak peaks at the gameplay, and even releasing a beta version for people to try out, kinda like a demo. When it finally came out in 2014, it became a HUGE success. 

“Fans and horror enthusiasts flocked to this game’s website to download it. People were obsessed with this game, and rightfully so. It was supposed to be like this super scary, gory, horror game where you played the killer. Like, most of these games are usually where you’re the one running from the killer. So, the concept of being the killer really interested people. Game critics loved it too. They said-and I quote- ‘A fresh take on the otome genre with lots of interesting routes and endings’ and called it ‘fun, clever, dark and absolutely horrifying’. Oh, and also, a lot of people liked the game’s LBGTQ factor. Players could choose their character’s and love interest’s gender and sexuality. It was really cool. You could customize them how you wanted, choose their uniform and all that stuff. 

“But then tragedy struck,” she said with a dramatic tone. “In June of 2015, police were called to Minho and Chan's apartment and inside they found quite the scene. They found the bodies of Minho, Chan, and Chan’s friend, Lee Felix in the apartment. Chan and Felix had wounds, like, everywhere: chest, neck, stomach…you name it, it had a hole. Who was it? The police believed it was Minho, who unfortunately killed himself as a result of his crime. When investigating further, police found out that Minho and Chan had a pretty abusive relationship. Friends of the couple said that Minho appeared very controlling and possessive with Chan; they thought he might've been physically abusive too. He didn’t like Chan talking to certain people, and always wanted to know where he was, what he was doing, who he was with, you know, the typical abuser stuff.

“This affected the game’s future in a big way. If the forerunners of the game were dead, who’d keep things going and update the game? Well, Stray Games got bought out by a big company and they decided to keep the game as digital copies for the time being, since people still wanted to play it. But, a few months after the murder, bad things started happening. People who played it reported lapses in memory, unexplained physical pains and also lots of hallucinations and nightmares. Soon, these claims became even worse. People started going into catatonic states whenever they played the game. This strange phenomenon caused people to do what’s now called ‘The Lovesick Challenge’. It’s basically where you download the game and see how long you last before you wake up…except, some people don’t wake up.” 

“17-year-old gamer Josh Truman from Ohio died weeks after falling into a coma. What got him into the coma? Nobody knows. He didn’t have any signs of trauma or disease to explain it. His mom told police and reporters she discovered him unresponsive at his computer, where the game played in the background. Josh was on an IV in the hospital under observation for at least a month before he suddenly flatlined out of nowhere. Just like that,” she snapped her fingers. “Crazy stuff. Poor boy…He just wanted to play a cool video game.

“Anyways, this made the company decide to pull the game entirely. They made an announcement shortly following Josh’s death that they’d be removing it from game stores and websites. There definitely were mixed feelings: On one hand, people still wanted to play this super popular game despite all the terrible news around it. On the other hand, some people demanded they take it down considering the people it affected. I think they made a good decision to shut it down, because, like, dude, people went into comas and died. But, one Reddit user made sure the curse lived on. 

“KushKush_69-psh, 69, haha-anyways, Kush produced physical copies of the game to try selling to people. He sold them online on Ebay and Craigslist and stuff to all those supernatural lovers who weren’t afraid of a little itty bitty curse. I think these people really only wanted to showcase them in their house or their store? I don’t believe they wanted to actually play it. Eventually, the game fell out of existence, but every so often it’ll pop up on Reddit or 4chan or some other social media website whenever somebody dies from it.”

You stopped watching. You turned cold imagining your own unconscious body slumped in your gaming chair. You wondered if anyone found you yet. They had to have. Irene, your boss, would’ve wondered why her star game tester didn’t show up for work. She’d most likely send the police for a wellness check, where they’d find your body. Like those before you, you imagined your body laying in the hospital, a vegetable attached to IV tubes. Your body is physically at home, but mentally you are in the game. What happened if you lived and decided to stay? Would you be in a hospital forever or would your body eventually die? 

“It’s a lot to take in, I know,” Chan finally said. “So I get it if you don’t want to discuss it now. But, you deserved to know everything. Minho withheld the truth from you so he could control you and the game. If you’d gone through this knowing everything you knew, you might’ve played the game differently. You might want to go home when you win, and therefore leave Minho forever.”

“There’s a lot of important information he neglected to mention to you. Like, he never told you about the canon eliminations.”

“Canon eliminations?”

“Yeah, each rival had an official elimination. Sure, you could go ahead and end them however you wanted, but doing all of them unlocked a special ending. Jisung’s canon route was sabotage, which you navigated expertly until Minho amped up the tension to make you murder Jisung. Changbin is supposed to be the expulsion or blackmail route.”

“You were meant to befriend Felix or get him expelled. Seungmin is supposed to be matched with Chorong, but Minho would’ve tried convincing you to kill him or something instead so you lose points. If you do the deaths like you’re meant to, you get the A+ ending which comes with, um…special ‘benefits'.``

You sneered, glancing at Chan, “Such as getting to taste Chan?” 

Chan leaned closer, eyes scanning your face to your lips. “More than a taste if you’re a good boy.” 

Jeongin coughed, interrupting you, and said, “Minho has no intentions of letting you leave this game alive.”

“I shouldn’t have trusted him. Even when he was Bott.”

“No, you shouldn’t have, but he makes it quite easy when he’s playing as Bott. It’s the best way to misguide players into losing or getting low ending scores. It’s a good scheme,” he said defeatedly. “It’s a very good scheme.”

“It is,” Chan agreed. “He finds the vulnerable player, scared and confused, makes them feel safe through his role as Bott and guides them through to the end. Once they’re convinced he’s on their side, he comes out of nowhere and kills them. Minho doesn’t care about you like he says he does. Everything he’s done so far was to make sure you didn’t get to the end. He might even try to get me too, then he's got both of us.”

“Is he going to want you now if you’re like this again? If you’re self-aware, he’d have a harder time controlling you.”

“No, but he’ll try changing me back. I don’t doubt he’ll put up a fight, but I’ll be prepared for it this time.”

You slid over to him, “I hope he doesn’t. I quite like you this way.”

“Oh yeah?” He raised his eyebrows, “What’s doing it for you?”

“Your hair, for one thing,” you replied. “I liked the clean look, but this suits your style more. It’s fluffy and long,” you ruffled Chan’s hair, earning a laugh from him. “And that nose stud’s pretty hot too.”

“You think so?” he closed the space between you, his body centimeters away from yours. “You should see my tongue-”

“-Chan,” Jeongin caught his attention. “It’s Seungmin.” 

You held back the growl that came from your throat. Seungmin came up to them with his notepad in hand. He kept his eyes on Chan as if nothing about his appearance changed. 

“Seungmin-ah,” Chan began, moving away from you, “How are you?”

“I’m well,” he shifted his eyes to you and then back, “I was wondering if you're up for doing that interview about the swim meet? I need to get it in by Wednesday, and I don’t want to fall behind.”

“Oh, um, okay. Yeah, sure,” he turned to you as he stood, “I’ll catch up with you in class. I have somewhere to be with Seungmin. You can find her on the roof.”  

He pointedly nodded at Seungmin, and you understood. “Alright, okay. I’ll see you in class then.”

When they moved out of earshot, Jeongin typed a few numbers into his own phone. He beamed brightly when the phone lit up and vibrated. In your own pocket, your phone buzzed loudly. 

“Seungmin’s class is on the second floor. He always leaves his bag there. Text me if you need me,” he said, standing up and grabbing his coffee. “Minho can’t get into your phone, so no need for code words.”

“Thanks…Bott,” you smiled with a wink, which made Jeongin light up. 

You watched him leave before standing up. You needed to get to the second floor. 

You still felt Chan’s hair between your fingers, and his warm breath on your skin. You wanted to plunge a knife into Seungmin for interrupting that perfect moment. But, no. You’d save that knife for Minho. You mentally kicked yourself for falling for the scheme. You thought Minho was wrapped around your fingers; that Bott spilled all the game’s secrets to you. In reality, it’d been the other way around. Your gut feeling had been right the entire time, but lack of allies kept you from trusting anyone else. It bothered you that Chan locked him up somewhere. You’d love to stomp on his face right then. You eagerly awaited Minho’s level.

Walking into one of the classrooms at the end of the hall, you found Seungmin did leave his bag upstairs. You checked for signs of other students before moving towards his desk. Your body bubbled with excitement as you unzipped the backpack. A copy of the day’s newspaper, several notebooks, and manilla folders proved this was Seungmin’s bag. You rifled through the books and papers before you found a hidden inner pocket. Opening it, you found a magazine; a very inappropriate magazine that could get him in trouble. On the front cover, a bikini-clad woman knelt on a fake sandy beach with a beach ball against her crotch. You ignored this and flipped to the centerfold.

Her name was Yunhee, a 23-year-old Korean girl from Daegu. She stood in a skimpy uniform in front of a chalkboard, a book pushed to her cleavage. Seungmin must like bookish girls, then. In another photo, Yunhee sat with her legs spread in a bra and skirt, reading a book titled ‘world politics’. Flipping through the rest of her photos, it became clear Seungmin liked girls with long brown hair, who wore glasses and liked reading, politics, world news and libraries.

Now, you only need to let Chorong know.

****

You found her at lunchtime. On the rooftop underneath the warm sun, she sat with a group of friends. They all ate the same meal and looked nearly identical apart from their hair colors. Chorong had not completely removed Felix from her appearance. The pink strands woven into her hair still hung to her shoulders and she hadn’t removed the large earrings. You were sure once you clued her in on Seungmin’s type, she’d change overnight.

“Um, Chorong-ssi?”

Her eyes widened when she saw you and she immediately stopped eating. “Oh, um, YN-oppa, what…What are you doing here?”

“I hope I’m not disturbing your lunch,” you said, putting on the shy persona. “I, um, wanted to talk to you about something?”

“What is it?”

You noticed her friends hanging on your every word. Small hearts floated above their heads as they giggled behind their hands. “I’d rather we talked in private. It’s a pretty sensitive matter.”

She glanced over to her friends, who nodded their encouragement. They likely expected a lovey-dovey, sickeningly sweet love confession. Pathetic. “Alright,” she said, tossing back her hair, “I’ll be back, you guys.”

“Is there something wrong, Oppa?” she asked, once you were out of earshot. “I used to be in the psychology club, so I can help with any problems you might have.”

“No, no, it’s nothing like that,” you assured her. “It’s about Seungmin” 

“Seungmin? Why?”

“I know you are close to him,” you said, wincing with your words, “And you have a crush on him.”

She grimaced with embarrassment, “You do?”

“I’m sorry, but it’s kinda obvious, but, um…I think Seungmin has a crush on someone else.”

She flared up at once, “What?! Who?!”

“Me?”

“You?! Why you?!”

“I don’t know,” you insisted. “He keeps following me around school and taking photos of me! It’s weird. I asked him politely to stop, but he keeps on doing it anyway.” She gave a shocked look as you continued, “I thought…ah, this is so embarrassing…but, I thought if he liked you instead, he’d leave me alone? You’d be his girlfriend, so he won’t have time for me.”

“Seungmin is stalking you? That’s very unlike him.”

“I don’t know whether it is or isn’t like him. I only know that it makes me uncomfortable, and confronting him didn’t work. Chan-hyung said I should try hooking him up with somebody else, so then he’d forget about me. I figure you’re the best choice, since you already hang around him a lot.” 

“I’m sorry, YN-oppa, but I think I know more about dating than you. I know how to get boys to like me.” 

“I’m sure you do. I bet you have loads more experience with dating and relationships than me,” you flattered her, “But, I learned what kind of girls Seungmin likes. I can help you become his dream girl, and then you two can get together and he leaves me alone”

You saw her consider this offer. Chorong, despite her words, has trouble roping boys into liking her. You were sure the only ones that do are those she doesn’t want. She’d be dumb to refuse this easy path to Seungmin’s heart. “You do?”

“Yes. I found out from asking around,” you said. 

“And you’ll tell me?”

“I can help. You two would make a very handsome couple. I’m sure you’ll be the envy of the school having such a good looking, intelligent guy on your arm. He’d be lucky to have you too,” you added, sprinkling a compliment that made her smile. 

“We would make a cute couple,” she smiled to herself. “I always wanted to have a guy’s class ring around my neck or a little promise ring on my finger. Gosh, can you imagine? It’d be so romantic.”

“It would,” you said. 

She thought it over, then said, “Alright, where do we start?”

“Your hair.”

“My hair?”

“Seungmin likes girls with long brown hair. Come to school like that, and I’m sure he’ll at least be noticing you. Then, we can start on the other stuff.”

“Long brown hair, got it,” she punched a fist into her palm determinedly. “Kim Seungmin is going to love me!”

“Yes, he will. He might even confess to you under the maple tree.”

She gasped, “You think so?”

“It’s supposed to be good luck and it’s such a romantic setting, no?”

“It is. Park YN, you’re a genius!” She pecked your cheek and hugged you tightly. 

“But, you have to keep this between us,” you warned. “If you tell your friends, they might follow the plan and try stealing Seungmin from you.”

She glared their way, “Ugh, they would try that. Right, I’ll keep it to myself. Thanks so much! You’re an angel!” 

She hugged you again and nearly skipped away. Watching her bounce back over to her friends, you knew this plan would work. Chorong will do whatever you instructed to make sure Seungmin became her man. You respected that. You knew you’d do the same if it meant Chan fell in love with you. You started thinking of ways you could increase and change her interests. It sounded like a long plan that’ll span several days. Hopefully, by the end of it, Seungmin’s investigation and interest in Chan will be replaced by his love for Chorong. 

All the information from this morning came back while you walked down the stairs from the roof. It sounded like something out of a movie or a sci-fi book. The supernatural aspect intrigued you. You imagined Chan’s love for his creation somehow saved him from going into the afterlife. He’d poured his soul into the game he’d made, so it made sense in a weird way. Perhaps this was the afterlife and they were already dead. You saw the challenge videos people made, passing out in their chairs after seeing a few seconds of the game’s introduction. Vaguely, you recalled your own transition, so you could not say it wasn’t real. The people who won the game with the A+ rank went home. The people who lost ended up dead. Thinking about what Minho had done to people before you, you could see the prospects of sabotage. Humiliation still nestled inside you admitting you’d been tricked. You’d always thought you had something over your adversaries, but it turned out the biggest one was much closer. 

****

The cafeteria was a sea of hungry students. You and Chan walked in together, and you felt yourself walking on clouds. The both of you joined the lunch line, grabbing trays to pile with food. 

“How’d it go with Chorong?” he asked, scooping rice onto the tray compartment. 

“Exactly as expected,” you replied. “She fell for it right away. It shouldn’t take long to get her. I’m assuming I have to wait until after school to work on it.”

“It’s advisable,” he said. “Waiting until tomorrow wastes time, which we don’t have that much of right now.”

You happened to scan over the lunch crowd when you saw Seungmin standing with another member of the Newspaper Club. You stared at the member, a short young man with black hair and wearing a neat uniform. You recognized him from the group Seungmin gathered about him. They stood talking close together; Seungmin’s glimpses over to you made you nervous. The sudden thought that the person followed you up to Chorong made you feel sick. His eyes trained on you while you walked to a table with Chan. A glint of jealousy and suspicion flashed before he turned away. 

“He’s having me followed,” you said, still watching Seungmin and his goon. 

“He is,” Chan confirmed, biting into his fried chicken leg. “It’s why you need to be extra careful if you do anything violent or suspicious. They’ll get photos and take them to Seungmin, who then takes them to the police. He’s been following you for a while now; something Minho kept you from realizing straight away. He’ll be around possible disposal spots, and have his little minions patrolling luring areas like bathrooms or locker rooms.” 

“Nosey fucker…”

Chan chuckled, “He’s got ambition. You can’t deny that.”

“And it’ll ruin everything.”

“Then get him to like Chorong.”

“That’s what I’m doing, but it’s going to take a while.” You turned back to Chan, “How do I make her smarter?”

He nearly choked on his chicken in a laugh. Washing it down with milk, he said, “The library. Just pick the subjects Seungmin likes, and it’ll make her ‘smarter’.”

“Just like that?”

“Just like that.” 

“You certainly made it easy. Tedious,” you noted, “But easy.” 

"Well, you made it this far on your own, despite what Minho might say," he said. "You'll do well."  He took a bite of his chicken again when he asked, “What did you do?” 

“Huh?” The sudden question caught you off guard. “What do you mean?”

“Before you got here, what did you do for a living? What was your life like?” 

Your heart softened hearing these questions. Having someone be genuinely interested warmed your insides. “I was a game designer,” you said, “I worked at Vision Entertainment as a tester and story writer.”

“How do sports games have story modes?” he smiled amusedly. 

“Oh, no they don’t do just sports anymore. They’ve branched out into action, adventure and horror genres,” you explained. “They hired me after my first game took off. They said they liked the story and the graphics, and wanted to get the rights to remaster it.”

“Oh? What was the game?”

“Nightmare Carnival,” you smiled proudly. “It was my first full length game, and I’d done most of the work myself until they gave me a team. It was about a group of teens who get locked inside an amusement park after hours and the player is one of the kids. They have to make it through the night with the demonic spirit haunting the place.” 

“Hm, interesting concept.” 

“They thought so too,” you nodded. “The player can’t fight back though. Their only choices are to hide, distract, or run away.” You smiled recalling your old game. You wished you could work on it more, but you might not get that chance. “It worked mostly on suspense and jumpscares, but I left hints of a mystery and lore inside the game that people liked.” 

“Sounds like a good game,” he complimented. 

“It was. It got popular through walkthroughs and gameplay videos people did online. When Vision picked it up, they wanted to do a sequel.”

Chan rolled his eyes, “Of course they’d want a sequel. Any time a game is popular, these companies come along and squeeze as much from it as they can. Then, they make spin off games and books and movies and all that crap.”

“Right? I told them Nightmare Carnival could possibly have a sequel to expand on the park’s mystery and backstory, but after that, there isn’t much. But, they started going on about a legacy storyline and making prequels too.”

“That sucks,” Chan said. “Stray wanted to do a sequel to Lovesick.”

“How would that work?”

“The sequel would be set in the future where the main character is the Sunghoon's kid,” he said. “It’d be the same thing: they go to a nice school, and kill some people to get their crush. I told them I didn’t want to do it. I felt like it’d be the same thing, but a different setting, and I didn’t want Lovesick to be my lifelong project. I had other games I wanted to make. Minho was totally on board with it. He said we had a good thing going and we’d be stupid to stop things now.”

“I mean, a sequel isn’t a bad idea.”

“Not you too,”

“No, no, I didn’t mean the same story. You could’ve taken the same concept, and flipped it.”

“Flipped it?”

“Yeah. Instead of the player being the ‘yandere’, they could play as the ‘senpai’,” you suggested before eating your own chicken leg. “The game could be them having to solve the murders of their friends, because the police aren’t interested or they think they’re just accidents.”

Chan paused, thinking it over while he ate pieces of kimchi, “Hm, that could work.”

“You can still keep the horror aspect with them getting slowly closer and closer to the truth before the killer’s revealed. But, you can add suspense and more story to it this time. I noticed Lovesick doesn’t have much of a story otherwise.”

“It does. I just never got to work on it much because everyone kept pushing the murder/horror parts of the game.”

“What was it?”

“I wanted to expand on the supernatural parts of the story. Like, Sunghoon is the way he is because of a demonic entity that’s followed him around since childhood,” he said. “It sort of talks to him and causes him to do all this crazy shit. I didn’t get t really flesh the idea out because everyone liked the insane stalker shit Sunghoon does.” 

“Maybe…” you pushed around the rice on your tray, “We could work on that sometime? You know, brainstorm together.” 

“That’d be awesome,” he smiled, dimples on full display and making your heart race. 

The class bell rang before you could ask for more. You moved to stand up before Chan stopped you. “Don’t go,” he said, “Let’s stay here and keep talking. I haven’t gotten to talk to you much while you’ve been here.”

“Won’t we get in trouble? We’re supposed to be in class. I could miss out on skill points.”

He snorted, “YN, I made this game. I can do what I want. Sit down."

You slowly sat back in your seat. The teachers supervising the area ushered students out of the cafeteria, but none of them noticed the two remaining students. This is truly heaven, you thought. Rather than waste time building skills, you sat with Chan in an empty room. You both continued talking about new versions for your games. Chan’s ideas amazed you. Being stuck with tons of free time, he’d spent it planning out new games he wanted to build. One involved playing as a dragon hybrid prince on a quest to save his kingdom, and another revolved around a dream world full of horrible nightmares. He intently listened to your feedback, eager to hear your inputs on his ideas. Talking to him felt so easy; you didn’t have to lie through your teeth or dodge questions. You could be open and honest. 

"Damn," Chan cursed, looking at his watch, "Swim practice."

"We don't have to go. It's not like it's important."

"It's not, but I like going," he eyed you up and down, "It's the only time I get to see you."

You internally squealed again, and didn’t hide it this time. You walked to the boy's locker room, where the rest of the team prepared for practice. The air in the room felt different, as if Chan’s change affected everything around them. He appeared more confident, less animated and mechanical than before. You watched him open his locker as one teammate approached them. Much like Seungmin, nobody noted the change in his appearance. To them, Chan always looked this way and you were being the weird one. You took him in for a moment. 

You couldn’t help admiring his body again now that he’d removed his shirt. Tattoos covered part of his chest and shoulders, going down to his forearms. Chan decorated his body with a story, and you would kill again to read every piece. His curls fell into his face over his brow, so he occasionally pushed it back, causing his arm to bend and his body to move with it. You noticed his nipples again, which were pierced. You longed to feel Chan now; more than before. Your fingertips ached to run over his muscles and skin, caressing and putting all the sensitive points to memory. How could Chan expect you to stand there and not do anything when he looked so tempting? 

You walked over to your own locker beside Chan and spotted another change. The swim uniform shorts, previously knee-length, now ended around the tops of your thighs. Nobody seemed bothered by the change but you. They casually strutted around as if this was the normal uniform. Your heart stopped when you saw Chan wearing them. The band around his waist, the skin tight fabric clung to his hips and ass, accentuating his silhouette from afar. The seams stretched around thick, muscular thighs. Their firmness and size were perfect for humping. You bit your lip as you pictured yourself grinding on one while flicking your tongue over the pierced nipples. As for the center, you prayed to God Chan never caught you staring too long. 

You clicked on your shorts, and knew they’d be riding up your crack by the end of practice. You took one more eyeful of Chan, then walked out to the pool with the others. Seeing the olympic size pool, the cool water would surely calm down your arousal. Positioning yourself at the end, you kicked off in a single push to dive in. The cold water latched right onto your body, giving a slight shock to your hot skin. You heard the others following suit, and people flew right past you. You weren’t the best swimmer, but that didn’t matter to you. 

When you reached the other side, someone cracked into you and bumped the wall. You didn’t need to turn around to know who collided with you. 

“Oh, I’m sorry, YN-ssi,” Chan’s voice drew low in your ear. “I didn’t realize we’d gone into the same lane.” A distinct ball of hardness poked between your buttocks. You bit back your lip again to suppress the sound that threatened to come out of you. “I’ve been dying to be close to you like this,” Chan pushed into you again, “Especially after watching you in your bed at night.”

“What do you mean?”

“I may have peeked at you once or twice while I was swimming around cyberspace, and seen your delicious body,” he said, fingers dancing on your hips. Your eyes fell shut at the touch, wishing there was a way to absorb and maintain the feeling forever. “I’d originally done it to watch over you, but then I started watching because I liked looking at you.”

“You watched me sleep?”

“I hope you’re not bothered.”

“Not at all.” 

Pressed into the wall, Chan’s hardness finally met your bulge. Chan leaned in and your lips locked together. Passion, longing and desire poured and flowed between the both of you. You gasped in surprise when something small and metal brushed your tongue. A tongue piercing. You swore he purposefully designed himself to pleasure you. The little ball only added to the sensations, dragging along your bottom lip every time they caressed you. Fire exploded inside you, scorching through when Chan pulled you closer, every kiss fanning the flames. You had killed and schemed for these lips. You’d done things you normally wouldn’t do for a mere taste of them. Now, you enjoyed them as long as possible. You let out a soft moan when a hand pinched your nipple. The uncomfortable feeling in your shorts became more apparent when your cock strained against the fabric.

“Mine,” he murmured in your neck, “All mine. I'm never letting you go.”

“You'd have to catch me first!”

You cackled and dove back into the water. Chan laughed after you, kicking off his swim shorts in the process. He swam closely behind you, making swipes at your ankles before you kicked farther away. You’d reached the halfway point before his hand grabbed your ankle and yanked you back. You intentionally slowed down to let him reach your hips, waiting for the fingers to hook your waistband before rushing away. He easily pulled off your shorts, and you gasped at the cold water exposed to your hottest area. You swam closer to the edge, Chan right on your heels until you came back together at the other end.

Up against the wall, you seized the chance to fondle Chan more. Hands roamed the tones body, grazing over smooth flesh and tensing muscles. His hard, solid body made everything feel real. In this virtual world where something can be something else, the thought of this moment being real sounded unlikely. You couldn’t help worrying about this being another trick of the game. Yet, when Chan brought you closer, the doubt disappeared. You’d never get this far if someone else pulled the strings. Your fingers delicately traced up the studs in his nipples, rubbing them to hear Chan’s soft whimpers. Your free hand ran over Chan’s hard bulge, letting it rest in the middle of your palm and tracing the length to the tip. Hard and hot, you brushed your fingertips over the very top of Chan’s tip, his lover giving another whimper. You continued doing this for a while, lightly tracing circles around the spongy head tortuously. You moaned into Chan’s mouth when a cold hand started groping you back, sliding further down to your balls and cupping them tenderly.

He helped you onto the top step of the pool ladder nearest you. Despite the cold, your dick throbbed being so close to Chan’s face. You stayed propped up on your hands as Chan licked a stripe from your balls to your tip, giving the head a very light kiss that made you shudder. He went back down the same way, latching his mouth to one of your balls. The sensitive sack in his mouth, he hummed softly as he rolled his tongue over each side. You tightly gripped the steel curves of the ladder, letting your back arch as Chan teased and licked you. Your moaning echoed in the spacious room once his hand wrapped around the base of your cock and slowly stroked.

“Channie…” you breathed, unable to take your eyes off the beautiful man nipping your thighs. “God, I’ve wanted this for such a long time. Don’t stop, please.” 

As you said this, Chan lifted himself onto the ladder by one leg and kissed you. “But,” he said innocently, “It’s cold here. Don’t you want me to fuck you somewhere more comfortable?” He used his free hand to resume jerking you, “Where we can enjoy each other properly?”

“I-I don’t care,” you huffed, looking down to see Chan’s cock sticking out straight. “I don’t care where we do it. I want it so badly.”

Chan chuckled, pecking your lips briefly, “Then let’s get dried up.”

You slid out from underneath him, concealing a whine when he released you. Once you got out of the pool, you pressed yourself to his body again. You said another heated kiss, walking backwards towards the locker rooms and leaving the team still swimming in the pool. Something told you none of them would interrupt you.

Inside the locker room, you brought him over to your locker and sat on the bench. Chan moaned when you took hold of his rock hard cock, stroking the precum leaking out and sucking the clear droplets sliding from the hole. Chan held onto your shoulders as he watched you lick and suck on the head. You reached behind him to the pert ass cheeks to give them a squeeze and bring him between your thighs.

“Fuck,” Chan groaned, restraining himself as you slide your tongue over the underside without the use of your hands. “Fuck, that feels so damn good…don’t…”

“Stop?” You finished for him, letting his dick stay on your lips and work around his erection.

“Yes,” he sighed, pushing his hips to your face before stopping himself. “I fucking knew your mouth would be heaven,” he said, tapping his dick on your tongue. “So tight and hot…I bet your throat is even better, but you probably can’t do that anyways.”

You heard the challenge in his voice, and smirked. “You think I can’t deep throat you?”

“I’m a bit too big for your little mouth,” he chuckled, sliding his tip along your lips, “It’s okay if you can’t. Not everyone’s an exper-Fuck, YN!”

You didn’t hesitate. You’d done it plenty of times. Breathing through your nose, you gripped Chan’s thighs as you sunk your face right to his crotch. Taking in the smell of him, enjoying the weight on your tongue and heat filling your mouth, you let his tip hit the back of your throat multiple times. You stared up at him as you continuously pulled him out and put him back in teasingly. Neither of you cared about the drool dripping onto your chest and the water coming from the corners of your eyes. You loved the slight suffocation each time he buried himself in your throat. 

Your own groin burned and tightened in your lap. You kneaded his ass while you worked his cock, yet you eventually stopped despite Chan’s objections.

“We need to dry you up,” you said, dotting kisses on his wet skin.

You grabbed the towel from the bench and started drying his legs and thighs. He shivered at the soft fabric against his skin, getting warmer as you wiped him down. You smirked when you heard him shudder at the towel grazing his hard nipples above you. This was so much better than you imagined. His body was to die for, and you just might die to get it. You wanted him for ages, and now you had him. You dried every part of him, saving his crotch for last. He gripped your shoulders as you finished off his sack and underside.

When you finished, you both switched places. Chan used the towel to tease you the same way, and continued using his mouth as he did so. You fell into a new wave of pleasure as Chan slid you between his lips. Sucking onto when pulling away, he kept the same pace as he dried up your stomach and chest. He pinched your nipples with the towel before going around to your back and ass. You didn’t care if he didn’t dry every part of you; the pink lips expertly working your length blinded you to all sense. The ball of his piercing traced along the thick vein pumping blood into your cock. It swished teasingly over your tip each time he came upwards, and you thought you might go insane. All you’d gone through the past weeks was worth it for this moment. Your knees quaked when Chan picked up his pace, his throat humming whenever he took you far enough.

“Chan, Chan, Channie,” you huffed as he sucked around your base while he pushed you into his throat again. His stud brushed the base, and you almost finished right there. “Oh my god, fuck, yes, yes, yes, like that. That feels amazing, please keep going. I want to cum so badly. Let me cum in your mouth, please. I promise I’ll do anything you want, please.”

When Chan pulled off you, you admired his wet lips and lustful eyes. Panting and licking the strings connecting him to you, the piercing hitting it each time, he looked up and said, “Then be a good boy and hold that in for me, okay? We only just started.”

“But-”

“-You want to make me happy, right?” he teased, kissing your throbbing head. “You’re doing all this to make me happy, right?”

“Yes.”

“Then make your hyung happy and hold that cum,” he said. “You’re doing so well already.” He sucked your dick a bit longer, chuckling with a full mouth when you wriggled around in place. He knew exactly where to weaken you. “Let’s go to my place. We can get more comfy there.”

He gave your dick one more kiss before standing up, and you both molded into one another again. Your hands went down to his groin, grabbing the considerable length and picturing it stretching you. Ages past since anyone touched or kissed you this way. You couldn’t remember the last time another person stoked the burning flames in his loins, making him nearly feral for release. Chan led you by the hand to the locker room entrance, both of you still completely naked as you reached the door. For a final time, he pushed you to a wall while a pink portal gradually opened before you. Tongues brushing together, teeth clashing, both of you fondled each other wherever you possibly could.

Once the portal opened, Chan pushed you into a bedroom. Chan’s bedroom. He wasted no time in pushing you onto your back and settling between your thighs. Pinning you to the bed, he passionately kissed and grinded into you. 

“Fuck me, please,” you panted between kisses, pushing your hips to his. “Please, fuck me, Chan. Please, please, I promise I’ll be good.”

“Since you asked so sweetly,” he said, pushing your legs further apart.

Grabbing lubricant from his bedside drawer, Chan lifted your legs to his shoulders and slide lube-covered fingers over your ass hole. This new sensation curled your toes and your eyes rolled back. Suddenly, your entire body became hyper sensitive to Chan’s touch. When he squirted more lube over your erection, his hand sliding smoothly with the slippery substance, a slew of moans escaped your chest. Two fingers gradually traced your entrance, breaking the motion with a shallow dip inside before continuing. Your orgasm tightened your abdomen and shivered down to your thighs. You worried you might burst any second with the nerves moving down to your groin. Chan didn’t say anything, but he sensed the climax approaching. Right as you tittered on the edge, he stopped.

“I want us to cum together,” he said in your ear, kissing the lobe and giving it a gentle nibble. “Are you ready?”

“Yes!”

He then sunk both fingers into your cavity, pushing all the way to the last knuckle and making you writhe underneath him. “Ooh,” he cooed at your desperate moan, “It’s exactly how I imagined it’d be.”

“Chan-hyung…” you pleaded, pushing into the fingers probing you.

“And exactly how I imagined you’d sound,” he said, pumping his fingers carefully in and out. ““Hearing you touch yourself in your bedroom is nothing compared to hearing you in person,” he squeezed the base of your cock. “I’ve wanted this for such a long time,” he dragged his fist up to the head, rapidly stroking it in time with his fingers to make you squirm in his grasp, “I’m going to savor every part of you.”

Your back arched the moment you felt his fingers brush into your g-spot. You quivered and gripped the pillow under your head as it pushed it over and over. Lost in the throws of your pleasure, you laid helpless as Chan fingered and stroked you steadily. After a few more pumps, Chan withdrew his hands and lifted your knees until your ankles hit his shoulders. You waited with bated breath as he pressed his tip to the wet entrance. He teased you further by rubbing the head over it a few times, slapping it between your cheeks before languidly pushing inside. Your moans became louder and more desperate. You felt every inch fill and stretch you until your bodies were fully connected.

It was everything you imagined and more. You couldn’t help meeting Chan’s hips in every thrust, your moans coming together in a symphony of pleasure and desire. After a few minutes, your body fully adjusted to him, and Chan went faster. He kept you pinned to the bed by your thighs, pushing them onto your stomach as he changed angles and pace. Your stomach tensed up as your orgasm once again built up in your body. You didn’t want to finish. You loved the sensations far too much to let go of them now. The slight burning of Chan’s girth stretching you was drowned out by the head tapping your prostate. It nearly blinded you to everything around you. You only felt Chan and his dick. Only he existed. You gripped onto his shoulders as he sensed your orgasm and charged after it.

He rested on top of you, spreading you apart and kissed you deeply. He did not lose his pace one, moans and whimpers exchanged between you. Your orgasm finally broke through when he started stroking your cock again, the muscle sensitive to his touch. You could feel nothing but the pure euphoria blasting through you; it caused you to writhe and whine in every pump. Everything leading to this moment did not seem pointless anymore. It felt justified. It felt right. A familiar warmth surged in your ass as Chan burst inside you. White hot and powerful, you latched to the release. Every stroke brought out more long streams and droplets of white to your stomachs. This reaction eventually brought out Chan’s, a mess of contracted muscles and jaw clenched as he grunted. 

Chan fell to the bed, and rested beside you. Exhaustion slowly came over your muscles and bones, causing you to sink into the mattress. All the stress and frustration of the past weeks faded away. You did not worry about Minho or eliminations or schemes. In this moment, you simply basked in the post-orgasmic glow of Chan, who was nothing but a panting, sweaty mess of limbs. You tucked strands of hair from his face, and kissed his temple softly. The young man rolled onto his side and returned it the same way. 

“Was it worth the wait?” Chan whispered, pecking your lips. 

“Very much worth it,” you replied in a smile. “I don’t ever want to leave this room. I want to stay here with you.” 

“I wasn’t planning on us leaving here for a long time,” he said, nuzzling your nose. “I worked hard to have you. I’m not letting you go so easily.”

You smiled, relieved by his words. You kissed one more time, ultimate bliss settling over you both as the game universe went onwards. You almost did not want to complete the game; you had what you wanted now, and didn’t need anything else. 

Chan was more than enough for you. 

****

A/N: heeeyyy guess what's baaack!! Sorry it's taken so long to update this fic. Im going to be posting the rest of it today so expect more chapters <3

[letomills]

Elaboration on my past shameful cc hair practices (I have learned the error of my ways)

Context over there. This here post is an answer to an inquiry by @sillysoraya.

This whole time since I started trying my hand at Sims 2 cc hair recoloring/retexturing, this had been my process: find recolors by a creator whose textures I want to use as a base, export said textures from their recolors via simPE, modify and/or recolor them in GIMP, then make fresh recolor files in bodyshop, reimport them immediately, close bodyshop, promptly delete everything that was generated in the Projects folder, take the new recolor files out of the SavedSims folder, and put my edited textures onto my them by building DTX in simPE.

When I say “textures”, I mean textures that look like this, you know, the ones you see in simPE with the transparent background:

[↑ that's evannamari's DBrown retexture of Newsea Miles Away]

That's how I do it for clothing, so why wouldn't it work for hair, I told myself naively in my immense hubris.

Well turns out there's a reason why the tutorials (such as this one by DeeDee) tell you to apply the textures not in simPE but in bodyshop. You’re supposed to put your textures in the Project folder - this kind of texture, that covers more than just the alpha:

[↑ the texture on the left / the alpha on the right ↑]

And only then you reimport and let bodyshop do its thing. The alpha will do its job carving out the texture properly (or whatever kind of sorcery happens in there).

Because if you give your recolors the already alpha’d out textures with the transparent background, what I believe happens is as the transparent background gets floodfilled with black during bodyshop’s file creation process, all the parts of the texture that had some wispy half-transparent hairs on them now have a layer of black underneath. Or at least what I know for sure is that those wipsy sections don't turn out looking nice but weirdly wire-y, especially on light recolors. Many hairs don’t have wispy strands and therefore are very forgiving (which is why I didn’t see a problem when I did the Rosesims hairs for example) but others have plenty of them, like the Newsea hairs. On those, it makes a clear difference. In game, it shows most as you zoom out, for instance in CAS from a face close-up view to a full-body view. It’s the same principle as this seam problem I had a while ago (and several times since), with clothing texture that was floodfilled with white too close to the borders of the texture mapping. When you zoomed out, the white would start showing.

Anyway, this is definitely stuff that creators in the community have known for 20 years and it’s 100% my fault for not following a hair tutorial and instead relying on prior knowledge of clothing-making that turned out not to be applicable 1:1.

I’m sure I still have a lot to learn on hair retexturing even after figuring this out. I was working on Newsea Yesenia when I had the realization that I was doing things wrong, but before I upload anything else, I’m gonna go back and look at all of the hairs I’ve done so far, fix them up when needed, learn more. Fortunately I think all of the Fakeblood gender conversions are fine but I’ll check and get back to you on that, there’s something I need to investigate. Edit: yes, all the gender conversions and copy-pasta of other people's unedited textures are completely fine, thank god.

Seems like as long as the texture didn't go through GIMP's import-export, it's fine, even if I didn't apply it via the Projects folder.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Ragatha x mute s/o headcanons pls? I love her so much ToT she's so sweet

Ragatha x mute!reader

UEUEUEUE I wasnt expecting to get TADC requests but I am all for it! Perhaps I should make an official post to advertise requests being open, feed into this new interest of mine.. mweheheheh

Side note! I'm writing this on mobile, so there may be more typos and grammar mistakes than my recent stuff (which has been done on computer)

I simply

Do not wanna get out of bed, it's very cold in my house <\\3

That said I hope you enjoy! Possible OOC since I'm still studying characters and trying to figure out how I wish to write/interpret them!

+ some other hcs since the post felt too short with the simple base idea

Right off the back with the main idea that helped push me to answer this now rather than later; ragatha would definitely learn sign language so she can understand you, if you find sign language to be easier/more convenient ! If not she always keeps a pen and paper on her in case you need it/forget your own notebook

Immediately welcomes you to the circus, similar to in the pilot she would show you around and explain the general way of things in the digital circus

Advocates for you when others (mostly Jax) speak over you (ignoring your signing, your writing, ect) or dont pay attention to you in a conversations

She doesnt try to force you to speak, nor does she pry for why you're mute

Generally very sweet and patient and stands up for you in group settings and makes you people pay attention to your input

No thoughts only you two cuddling in one of yalls rooms and you start pressing signs into her skin, communicating that you love her or that shes pretty or that you're enjoying being around her , stuff like that. I think that's sweet, like how some people trace a finger over someones freckles or moles during cuddles

Now onto more general hcs and ideas

I saw a ferris wheel at the digital carnival. You already know what I'm about to say: THE FERRIS WHEEL GETTING STUCK TROPE. Ragatha tries to keep the air nice and light while you guys wait for Caine to fix the issue. Afterall, she ain't afraid of anything but centipedes!

Speaking of, you're not afraid of centipedes, are you? Borrowing this from random things #7, where I mention an idea of the reader helping rid her room of the wretched things, that can be a surprisingly nice bonding moment with you two just talking and you letting her vent her frustrations

You two naturally gravitate to one another when Caine has everyone do a game or challenge or whatever he has planned for that day

[jollyreginaldrancher]

Yellowjackets S3 E10 liveblogging

I made a bunch of posts between eps talking about my thoughts and speculating on the next ep. Didn't watch any previews and stuff. Also this time I'm going to watch the credits cause I don't imagine we'll get any spoilers for this ep, what the hell.

Okay.

I wonder who's gonna do the "previously on" line. Under 15 minutes to go and I'm watching something to pass the time and doing some chores and stuff. Really hyped for this one.

I've got this Tumblr app and post open to avoid anybody spoiling anything from the episode or the preview or whatever. Haven't been online since I saw that preview dropped really. Not in Tumblr or tiktok at least.

Aaand it's finally up

I think it was Natalie this time. The previously thing. I'm counting it as confirmation that this episode's fucked up.

Just rewatched Van die in HD so...that was fun.....

If we don't get straight to Misty and Nat I swear-

Nah, yeah, montage, that's totally what we need right now.

Tell me the episode continues where the last one ends and we don't have a fucking time skip

Are they dragging Misty back to camp?

NATALIE?

Fuck is this because of the attempt...I forgot about that.

Tai I know that's you under that fuckass mask next to Shauna.

Wait, Hannah?

Misty? In her hut? What the fuck is going on?

I hate when they do shit like this and leave you disoriented. It genuinely pisses me off. Feels like I'm being edged, just show me the follow-up conversation and continue from the last fucking episode, it's not that hard, for fuck's sake.

Okay, what was that look between Misty and Nat

Oh oops and we're flashing back to that and Natalie is blaming Misty for everything like I guess I knew she would. Very loudly. Screaming like she never scrumpt before.

Oh

Woah

I called Natalie socking her when I guessed that was how her glasses broke but not... Wow

Okay

So Natalie socks Misty so hard she has a cut on her lip that I don't remember noticing on adult Misty but whatever.

She doesn't tell anyone though

And her and Van and Misty work to get everyone home

Shauna's running a secret police natzi style

She doesn't want to get back so she's looking to find the radio? Make sure they can't get home? And Nat and Van and Misty are hiding it and undercover working together to get them home

So Van must know or at least suspect Misty found the flight recorder and crap.

I hope they find out eventually that it wouldn't have helped them get rescued or at least Natalie and Misty figure out what it's actually for...

I don't see either Misty or Nat ever letting this go though.

Meanwhile Lottie's snug in her bed while visions of antler queens dance in her head

Heartbreaking to see the new dynamics

They're clearly trying to keep it on the down low that they're working together but Misty can't help feeling for Natalie and almost blowing their shit by being kind to her so Natalie has to learn to push Misty away to hide their secret relationship. Makes their adult dynamic make more sense.

So this version of the antler queen that Lottie sees is her adult self

AND SHE HAS A PROPHESY OF HER DEATH! Or at least herself post death.

What did they promise?

Who are they meeting? Is it Laura Lee? Tell me it's Laura Lee

Is that Shauna's baby crying?

We're kinda getting her death out of sequence a lil

We're seeing like her death, pre death and post death merging together in her mind which reminds me of bly manor a lil bit

Are we gonna finally get some answers though?

Oh come on.

Was there numbers on their necks in the intro at some point?

Ah fuck

Back to Shauna's milfmobil

What are we up to now?

Tell me they're not burying van in the woods like a prom night baby

God this is heartbreaking

Taissa resolves to unite her two halves by no longer burying her other half and

Oh

I don't know what I expected

I really should have seen this coming

Adult timeline is gonna pop OFF next season (after the obligatory 7 episodes where nothing fucking happens)

Okay

Alright

Misty's gone to see Callie

Callie #1 suspect for Lottie's death LET'S GO!

I think I called it btw

Oh I know the stans are gonna be going off about Misty calling out Callie for drugging her

Hillarious but she has a point and she's allowed to not be happy when it happens to her even if she did inadvertently drug the whole group that one time

Yo why DOES Lottie have a picture of Shauna's kid on her damn phone

Lottie I need you to beat the groomer allegations

I KNEW IT

IT WAS CALLIE

Okay

Last second guess

She lures Callie down to the basement with the tape, tries to get her to do some ritual and Callie freaks out and runs, and Lottie dies in the ensuing scuffle

Ok I'm starting to feel a lil sad for Callie.

She just has the door opened up for her, she can ask anything she wants, and her thirty-year-old actress just asks if her mom loved her. Damn. Honestly though this would hit harder if Callie wasn't so annoying and all this time wasn't wasted on her when I'd rather be watching other stuff. On rewatch I'm sure she's more palatable but to me she'll always be pretty irrelevant. Not even adjacent to the characters I like.

Like at least Lisa's thing with Natalie was interesting and developed her but they're trying too hard to set up Callie as another protagonist when there's nothing really interesting about her, at least to me

"we couldn't stop" they're leaning into the post-rescue hunting clues. Really insinuating that they kept going after rescue but that would be so unsatisfying. How would they even maintain that? People would notice they went missing once a month and shit. And if they kept disappearing. Unless they hunted other people. Which they would logically also notice, if people around them kept dying and going missing after they were rescued. I don't think I like this idea but fuck it, I guess that's where the show is going. I think I hate it though.

I hope it doesn't lead to two seasons post rescue where they're pulling adult timeline bullshit in the teen timeline.

"our child" Lawttie stawp!~

If Shauna was there to hear this she would have ended Lottie herself

"it was an accident" she says as she full body tackles Lottie into the abyss

An accident

Accident

Nevermind, fuck you Callie, I don't like you

I know she's gonna be leading the hunt 2.0 by season 5 finale too, and she's out here calling Lottie insane and claiming she doesn't buy into it.

Sweet scene with Callie and Jeff. I still can't let myself like him or Travis though for what they did to the girls.

Anyway I was right about her death and it seems I'm right about Van and Misty and Natalie working together in secret

I notice winter is more gradually settling this time around and not hitting them like a dump truck like last year.

Aww, Akilah.

Did they forget to build the animals a pen or something to keep them warm during winter?

God the little scarves and stuff they put on them, they really are just kids out here 😭

Yeah Lottie, how did it happen?

Natalie don't talk. Matter of fact, Natalie get behind me, you know you're one spot away from living in that pen, stop talking up.

Mari, the fuck?

I wanna see what to Lottie and Nat Stan's have to say at Lottie smirking when Shauna threatened Natalie into joining the hunt.

Okay. I see now.

Misty and Natalie and Shauna. Van's choosing is how they survive. Tai wants to save her best friend so Shauna's off the table, Nat too because she deserves better and Misty cause she's helping them get out.

Van rigged the cards for shit bucket duty

And she thinks she only now is going to start picking who dies

Baby you've BEEN picking

Tai has a point. It's nice to see season one Tai stepping up and Tai take the reigns again because I was tired of her just being a collaborator, watching on the sides.

Roflmao HE LEFT! HE LEFT AND TOOK THE KID! YAS KING!

You think Melissa ran back to Shauna after all that? I was thinking how hillarious it'd be if the baby survived and shit and Shauna made it back with a baby AND a girlfriend

Her mom would have a coronary

Now LottieShauna is living that dead wife life. John Wick style. Hearing voices and imagining shit.

Where DID everyone go though? That Camo was empty. Was it a dream or someone fucking with her?

Do we think they ever figure out what Van's doing? Also are people gonna start trashing her too now that they know she's straight up picking who's dead or alive and not as innocent as she seemed all along?

Does Misty know about the card rigging? And is Van doing it by switching the order of cards so if anyone stepped out of line or whatever they could fuck the whole thing up?

I'm terrified Lottie's gonna fuck the card order and Akilah's gonna get it. Or Mari. Or maybe Gen

All I know is I'm reading fanfiction and chatting to bots tonight, I'm gonna be fucked up by what happens for sure.

Oh fuck

Shauna

No

no

NO

NO!

Okay

Okay

Mari's NOT going to die

She has the necklace on

She can't die

Fuck you Lottie

NOW Travis is drinking

Great

I'm guessing she's going to hide in the cave

Is Travis going to warn Shauna about the trap?

Mari is for sure not pit girl because I don't think he's told anyone and pit girl was keeping an eye out for the trap and also she was in a nighty so she's definitely not pit girl.

I hope the necklace keeps her safe.

Slumber party makeouts? JACKIESHAUNA CONFIRMED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway Travis is on some funny shit

I love Misty not just washing that man out of her life but removing every trace of him from her house. Please go off on whoever is at the door baby cakes, you deserve it.

Shauna

Why am I not surprised?

YES

YES

PLEASE

PLEASE GO GET A RESTRAINING ORDER I'M BEGGING YOU

Back to mari

Wait

Wait no

Don't tell me

Tell me she doesn't take her damn clothes off

I think she's gonna strip to lead them away

Then almost fall in the pit trap but not

Because pit girl is from the adult timeline

That's my guess here

Is Taissa trying to spare Mari?

Are we gonna have the same TaiShauna fight we had last season all over again?

Are they gonna kiss?

Ngl there was a split second where I thought they were gonna kiss

Is that Natalie with the phone?

Fuck is she gonna get caught by Hannah?

Is that the scene from that first preview where someone's like grabbed by someone else and shit?

Are Van and Nat and Misty and Taissa and Gen planning to call for help or is Gen and Van and Tai gonna try to help Mari or is this part of another plan or...there's so much they're leaving out of the teen timeline.

Honestly? I want Natalie to stab Hannah. To not believe her. To call the hunt off by killing her or whatever. Just go the fuck off. I do NOT trust her and I think it's gonna jite Natalie in the ass if she spares her (again).

What's Akilah up to?

Naw tell me she's not going back in the fucking caves

Akilah's gonna die now isn't she? They've been building up to this all season

And Shauna found the clothes and it seems she's falling for the trap, not that it's a good one but it's bought Mari a few seconds while Shauna looks around like "is this bitch really dumb enough to take all her fucking clothes off and run around barefoot during winter?"

Akilah again.

I want to find a completely feral Lottie down there. If you're gonna go there go all the way there.

Ain't no fucking way

AkIlAh? Baby why? To get rid of Hannah?

Oh no, Akilah

Be careful, baby

Oof, see? I called it. Psych out. And now for Mari to walk away from this unscathed and not fall into a pit trap.

Okay is this a coup on Shauna?

Aww she's only trying to help.

Now I'm hoping Gen's not pit girl either

Come on Mari, prove them wrong! Best the pit girl allegations!

Okay, who the fuck levelled Shauna then?

Misty?

Was it MISTY?

Goddamn!

Cause she's like the only one left

Other than Melissa who I don't see having the balls to- oh no

Mari ran into Lottie

Lottie who knows about the pit trap

Are they on the pit trap?

Is this reality looping?

This is some mind bending stuff right now

No

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

Fuck

Gotta give them kudos for blending this scene seamlessly with the pitgirl scene

Was that an eye on the tree? Sort of?

Okay it was melissa

For a glorious moment I dreamed that Misty had enough of Shauna's shit and decided to do the group a solid one though

"I knew you'd turn out to be boring" oh please punch her again Mel

Oh and by the by, FUCK YOU TRAVIS

I need something strong after this

Anyway, who's Tai talking to? Finally seeing some sense. I see they took a vow to protect one another but kinda dumb to like cut everyone off and run if you're gonna do that. If they stayed in each others lives it would look way less suspicious if they did seek each other out rather than only knocking on one another's door when you need help to cover up a murder.

Now I hope Taissa's talking to Misty but I suspect she's talking to herself. I wonder if people will think she's talking to another yellowjacket we haven't seen yet though.

OH SHIT!

SHE'S TALKING SENSE!

TO THE RIGHT PERSON!

FINALLY!

SOMEONE'S CUTTING MISTY INTO THE FOLD.

So next season it WILL be most yand Taissa working together to bring Shauna and Melissa down and Shauna trying to get her family back and shit I guess.

Walter keeps on creeping on

What did Natalie end up doing with the phone?

Did she put it back or hide it?

Oh now we get the pit girl scenes in this cringy montage

Fuck you Shauna for making Natalie the butcher officially I guess now

I guess that's how the hair thing started on the antler queen thing

Or Shauna just wanted it as a prize

Fucking sick fuck

Loser adult Shauna being the most boring character hits my funny bone in a special way

Adult Shauna speedrunning turning into Van's mom

Is that the FUCKING LETTER UNDER THE FRIDGE?

Ngl I can't read some of that writing

Give us a voiceover I'm begging

Forgiving herself is the last thing Shauna needs to do

First thing is hold herself accountable

Honestly I don't think I can sympathize with her, even if she does

Oh for fuck's sake

With that fuckass journalling

Sddjgfyhdhdhdbdbxuduoggbhd

"I was a warrior"

"we were having too much fun"

Speak for yourself

Literally everyone else has got a conscience

Misty regrets to the end of her days that she broke something she thinks could have helped

Took a punch to the face for it and kept working to get back

Taissa, van, all the other girls

Shauna's the big bad here

She's officially the antler queen

But like she's way too fucking into it

Now that she has all the power

It's fun

But when she was nothing it was horrible

The lack of self reflection is hers alone

Everyone else has BEEN reflecting and seeing shit. Or at least some of them. It's just Shauna who's revelling in her power. And Lottie.

Anyway.

Natalie's being really quiet.

That's not Natalie is it?

It's hard to tell with those masks.

But I'm guessing she pulled a fast one here.

Hannah!

I knew it!

Natalie's trying to call for help isn't she?

Nah fuck off Misty did NOT have that cut on her face in the teen-

TIME LOOP

THEY'RE IN A TIME LOOP

THE WILDERNESS IS PURGATORY

WE ARE NOT WATCHING FLASHBACKS TO THE TEEN TIMELINE WE ARE WATCHING THE PURGATORY TIMELOOP WHERE THE YELLOWJACKETS ALL WENT AFTER THEY DIED

All these characters are dead and this is their souls living over the wilderness timeline over and over and over again

That's why things look different this time around

This time Natalie punched Misty and gave her a scar or a cut at least that she had during the pit girl scene

Last time she didn't

And Misty I see that smile

You know don't you?

Natalie's gone up the mountain to get a better signal, hasn't she?

I fucking knew it

THAT'S MY BABY

THAT'S MY GIRL!

I'm guessing next season will be Natalie trying to get help to come over while Shauna tries to hunt her down road runner and Wile E Coyote style. There's a schism in the group already and people are picking sides and nobody's on Shauna's aside from Lottie who's obsessed with her eyes and her baby.

Disappointed we didn't see Laura Lee to be honest

Maybe another time

But yeah

That my theory

[kellysue]

On Interviews and Getting All Up In My Head

If you haven’t yet listened to Sam Fragoso’s interview with Annie Baker, please do. Baker is startlingly honest, and I mean that literally. I was folding clothes, hadn't even chosen the episode—it was just the next thing in my queue after whatever grisly murder podcast I had purposely selected. I was startled enough to stop folding, rewind, and listen again. I don’t want to say too much about it for fear of spoiling the experience for you, but there’s an authenticity there that’s rare. If anyone within the reach of this email knows Fragoso or Baker, please pass along my compliments. It was a hell of a thing.

Interviews are on my mind as I gear up to do press for the new comic. I’m not a shy person, not an introvert in the least (as anyone who’s met me will attest) but I do get up in my head about this stuff. It’s a part of the job that elicits a stew of feelings. The sort of vulnerability required to write, to create anything really, is different from the vulnerability required to talk about the work, about the process, or about yourself in that mix. (My heart is beating a little bit faster all of a sudden—my body reacting to even the thought of it. No kidding: I just got a notification from the Apple Health app.) There’s a certain defensiveness in the experience, no matter how friendly the interlocutor, one I suspect is fueled by the spirit of this internet age. As a part of your brain is searching for an honest answer, another is running through all the ways your response could be deliberately misconstrued, and a third is asking, ‘Will this really help the sales of the book/film/show/etc.?’ Is this worth it?

Baker lays all that bare; she risks being considered “difficult” or annoying Fragoso. (To his great credit, he doesn’t just allow for it; he answers her vulnerability with his own.) She appreciates the thoroughness of his preparation but at the same time wonders aloud at the peculiarity of having something she once said parroted back to her as Truth. She doesn’t deny having said it, and likely it was true once, but memory and identity are fickle things, and the perspective of age alters how the light hits both. Of course, for the purpose of an interview, for the purpose of any conversation, there have to be some things we take as given, but her willingness to highlight the absurdity of the exercise, to own her discomfort, and then to light up when Fragoso is willing to ride along is refreshing, a buoy to me just now.

I love her willingness to push back, too. If you know me, you know I can be a lot, and I don’t exactly have a reputation for conflict-avoidance, but there have been moments/remarks in interviews past that I let slide unchallenged and they gnaw at me still. My hesitancy to hit the press circuit probably has something to do with that as well. Fear of signing up to either answer the well-meaning stranger back or grit my teeth and learn to live with another Lego in my shoe. And for what? In comics, anyway, no one seems to know what press, if any, will move the needle.

Oh goodness. Reading back, I’ve descended into something that looks rather unflatteringly like privileged moping. I am fortunate to make my living in the arts, I know. My challenges are hardly those of a coal miner or a policy-maker, I know, but here we are. Bucking up now, I promise.

I’ll say in closing this bit out, though, that I probably ought to own that my efforts to find new ways to market FML (starting with the acrostic in the last email) are not entirely about the current media landscape. They’re at least in part a reaction to the current me landscape. And I think it’s probably okay to acknowledge the absurdity of being so tired you can’t bring yourself to do things the usual way and then making up new approaches that require three times the work. Nothing if not on brand.

xo

Kelly Sue

[fairyminnie444]

i wanted to ask a more spesfic question in reguards of my situation because i feel like im over complicating everything even though im aware of how simple it is. I have known about the law assumption since last July and I feel like I'm in the same place I was when I started in July to now and it's just like I am so tired of learning and not seeing anything happen. ( I am aware that whatever you are aware of expands) I feel like there are times where I literally just am angry because I feel like I'm telling myself that I am this new identity, but it's like, everything around me keeps reminding me of my old one and I feel like this has been months and months of this happening like I've cleared all my social medias. I've stopped using tiktok because of all the distractions i see on there. I only have one friend now and I'm just trying to get rid of anything and everything that reminds me of my old self but it's like, I feel like I'm trying so hard and I'm aware that you don't need to try but it's like when I do nothing and just try to live in the knowing I feel super stagnant because I'm not seeing anything new it's just I feel like I'm in a snow globe I don't belong anymore and it's just like super draining because it's like I have all this knowledge and I know what I need to do and I'm doing it but I'm just like stuck in this in between of having it and not having it, I'm like in this like weird middle part and I've been in this part for so long and it's just like I've tried every way of detachment and letting go parts of myself but i constantly do these battles where it's like I'm trying to disregard these thoughts that are my old identity, but they just keep on lingering and like at times I try not to focus on it but it's like I've created an identity saying "I have it but never seeing it in the 3-D" its so weirdly complex, I've created an identity that is solelyimaginary, how i feel right now is like law of assumption is a fixation of my mind and only belongs in my mind. and I know that's obviously not the reality and truth of the law but I think that's what my consciousness believes and I know this seems all very complicated but I think I've just had too much time to reevaluate over and over again, Ik ive done things right in ways because I've manifested things before and they always worked out when I was completely calm and still in who I was and knowing who I am, but it's like it will be like that for maybe a moment and then I'll start to have doubts and stuff like that and I'm thinking that it's self-concept problem but I've done so much self-concept work and it's just overall very very draining for me and I want this to be over. I want to get out of the middle part and completely embody the new life, without wavering and without doubts, and without all of this stuff that's coming with it because of my old self. I know that naturally for every person that's going through law of assumption journey, or whatever has the stage where their old self fights them, and tries to make them believe the old story, but there's no way that this is supposed to last for seven months like this is absolutely crazy to me. i'm the girl that recommended the power of I am channel to you maybe like a month ago and if you remember that message I sent you then, I feel like the contrast between that message and this message just shows how much wavering goes on in my reality like I literally can't stress enough how tiring this is it's like my brain is constantly fighting 2 realities, 2 identities and I just want the old one to die so bad and I know you watch Eric and he gives out every answer for this and I know in the end, there's probably nothing that you can respond to this that I don't know myself, but I'm at a point right now where I just need some advice from somebody that knows and can understand where I'm coming from specifically.I think partially the reason behind it could tie to family life because i've had a very oppressive life as a kid but its such a weird parallel because I'll think things like this, but then go to dr. & loop

I got you and I remember you. ❤️

You know this is simple, but your mind keeps trying to “figure it out” and analyze it, which creates complexity where there is none. I did that too, it’s super normal.

Maybe you’ve associated “doing nothing” with stagnation instead of true knowing. You’re waiting for the external to prove it to you.

You’re just hyper-aware of the “in-between” stage, and that’s what’s making it feel like it’s lasting forever.

Here’s the truth: the “middle part” is an illusion. It only exists because you keep identifying with it even tho u don’t want to. The only reason it feels like you’re fighting between two realities is because you keep acknowledging the old one as something that’s still there.

You’ve already shifted, the only thing making you feel stuck is the belief that you’re stuck. You know it’s simple you know. But You’re still measuring progress based on 3D (even if it’s just the absence of change). That’s reinforcing the idea that you’re in the “in-between” instead of fully being in the new.

I found myself in this situation a short time ago and since you already know everything, I'm going to tell you what I did and I hope it helps you somehow ❤️

I cried a lot, I freaked out. I couldn't swallow the anger I had, so I let it out without fear. I acted like my old self and vented everything my old self was feeling. Because asking myself "what would I do if I had what I want?" certainly wouldn't be freaking out like I was freaking out. But I needed to get it OUT of me. I was tired because I thought that process was exhausting like you. But it's not. What is exhausting is human experience itself sometimes. (in my opinion) But we know something that many people don't know and that can take away all of that bad feeling and give us PEACE. And as soon as the feeling came out, I started to feel again like I am what I want to be. Know that you will feel things that you don't identify with and sometimes you won't be able to repel them, but it doesn't change the fact that you are the creator of your reality and knowing this is all the foundation you need to not drown in your human emotions. You always have somewhere to go back to. AND THIS DOES NOT NULLIFY YOUR PROCESS. You don't start all over after that, you're already there.

I just stopped fighting, you said it was tiring and draining you too, you know it’s not supposed to be like that. Stop trying to make yourself believe. The overanalyzing, the re-evaluating, the need to “get rid of” the old identity—that’s what’s keeping it alive. You don’t need to kill the old self. Just stop feeding it attention.

I released the process. This is done. You are her. There’s no “figuring out” left to do. The moment you fully accept that, it will show up effortlessly — just like it did in the past when you were fully calm and still. Just let go the how and when. That’s the most important, also to keep you free from this doubt too.

The snow globe feeling—that sense of being trapped, seeing your new identity but not fully experiencing it—is just a byproduct of over-identifying with the transition phase. You’re not actually stuck. You’re just still looking at life through the lens of “I’m trying to become this” instead of “I already AM this.”

You don’t break out of it—you just realize there was never a barrier to begin with. The moment you stop seeing yourself as “stuck in between,” the in-between disappears.

Imagine waking up tomorrow with complete amnesia about ever struggling with this. No memories of feeling “trapped,” no questioning if you’re doing it right, no awareness of a “transition phase”—just the assumption that you are already living as her.

You are already outside the snow globe.

You know it's already done the moment you decide. So do things you like, do nothing and still know it's already done, download TikTok again, fuck it!!! If you see something that doesn't align with your reality, walk straight past it, deny it, laugh about it as if it were something completely outside of your reality. You don't need to hide or avoid things because you already know who you are. That's all that matters.

If you want to talk more about it with me so we can deal with it more together, send me an ask with your username so I can DM you 🫶🏻

[btheleaf]

What made you like Pema? :3 Just out of curiosity, I feel like she's a character many people tend to kind of ignore or dislike.

Short answer: Spite

(Very) Long answer:

Tenzin was my first love and obsession when I got back into LOK. I went to AO3 to read about him and his wife! and found the attitudes towards Pemzin... odd? The ship is way less popular than Linzin, which was strange to me at the time, considering Pema/Tenzin are literally married in canon. But hey, whatever, to each their own. Maybe people just like Linzin more. Lin is a sexy badass, so I get it. Maybe people don't wanna write about the air babies. Maybe the age gap or any other countless things were giving people the ick about pemzin. Fine. It's all good to me. I began to look for pemzin fics to enjoy and found 🥲 strange things.

Pema was usually written as some kind of man-stealing demon with a magic coochie that could make Tenzin bend to her will and stay with her despite the fact that he loved Lin more, but at the same time she was a dumb and useless broodmare? More often than not, the Pema/Tenzin fics seemed to be written by people who didn't actually care for the ship and had Linzin endgame in mind.

I thought, "Okay, I'll check out Linzin, surely with way more fics to pick from, I'll find something that focuses on Lin/Tenzin and not Bad and Evil Pema."

I was disappointed to say the least.

So much cheating and lying, so many secret babies. SO MUCH Pema v. Lin, which doesn't do anything for me. I could understand it if there were Actual Reasons, but it was like Pema was showing up to be an emotional homewrecker despite her being IN HER OWN HOUSE. I just... like what the fuck is going on there?

Why does Pema hate Lin SO MUCH? Did the stories ever touch upon that? No. She just hates Lin. Obviously. Lin dated her husband 20 years ago, so she hates her. Logical. Much logic. No explanation. Look no further. Your bad guy is here. Bye-bye interesting concepts. Pema is a bitch and a snake and a man-trap and she never loved Tenzin anyway. She just wanted to be a trophy wife who ushered in a new generation of airbenders. No explanation. Don't question it. She's one-dimensional in a 3D world.

Pema is everyone's favorite bad guy in Linzin fics all because of that one line from Book one that is honestly super fucking cringe about her "seeing her soul mate with someone else." Linzin shippers asked if anyone was going to demonize this mother of four and didn't wait for an answer.

Both Pemzin and Linzin shippers need to learn how to tag their fics for both "emotional cheating" and just straight up "cheating." Navigating this shit is terrible. I once read 50k of a very interesting concept, and then all of a sudden Pema came out of nowhere and just started acting like a jealous 13 year old for no reason and Tenzin QUICKLY left her and the kids to go be with Lin. Like?? I do not understand what the fuck is going on in some people's minds.

WHERE WERE THE FICS THAT PAINTED PEMA AS A WHOLE HUMAN PERSON WITH FLAWS AND WANTS AND DESIRES??? I think most of my comments started having "thank you for writing Pema like a person" somewhere in them.

When I first made this blog and Let It Be Known that I ship pemzin, I got a looooooot of weird anons asking me stuff about like, if I support cheating and shit? I realized that these attitudes towards Pema were not Old Beliefs. These were very real people in the year of 2024 still unable to conceptualize an interesting idea for a character that has SO MUCH room to play with.

We know jack shit about her. We know just enough that makes her entire character like candy to me. She's not around a lot in the show, but also somehow is always still right there? She goes through Some Very Real Shit in every season, and her absence from screen time is like free real estate to fic writers. I literally don't understand how so many people manage to summarize her entire being into the word "snake" and move on. The potential for expanding on her character is limitless because of how little we know. The more people try to stuff her into a box, the more I'll pull her out of it.

I didn't really care about Pema until it became clear that everyone else disliked her. The more people hate her, the more I love her and the more powerful I become.

I'm like this because of how the fandom treats her.

[elysianstars]

Part of being a fan of the Fell Xenologue, is frantically trying to come up with explanations for weird stuff the plot does.

Why do some people confuse both Alears, despite the gender swap? Why does Rafal not seem invested in Ivy's attempt to revive Sombron? What was Sombron actually trying to achieve with his heir/legacy nonsense, and how did Rafal expect to do that properly without understanding it? Why was Nil, the weaker and less useful twin, getting sent off to battlefields without Nel? Why could Alear only sense something strange about Nel's dragonstone, and Zelestia identify that as Sombron's magic, after it was shattered? How did Sombron, the world's worst parent, manage to spot the difference between Nil and Rafal? Why are Nel and Rafal not doing anything during Chapter 21 of the main story, if you have them recruited at that point? When did Gradlon sink during the Xenologue timeline, and if it was after Sombron's first defeat then where were all his surviving offspring hanging out for the next thousand years?

I've got elaborate headcanon answers for the majority of those, which let me sleep at night, but literally every time I replay, more questions manifest to torment me. Here's the latest set.

1. After the battle in Firene, why does nobody ask how the Bracelet of the Brash General came to be awakened with Fell power? Obviously 'Nil' knows, because he did it. Nel suspected the royals were Corrupted, and it would make sense that whatever Fell sibling was responsible for that would have woken the Bracelet at the same time. So she's got a working theory that she'd rather not discuss yet. But neither Alear nor Zelestia suspects that, so why do they never question who's going around messing with these Emblems, without actually stealing them?

2. I always had the strong impression that Nel and 'Nil' ditched their family a long time ago, and were living in Lythos for most of the thousand year peace. But in one of Zelestia's supports with Madeline, she claims the twins didn't appear until Sombron 'showed signs of returning'. Which makes far less sense, since where does that place them for the last several centuries? In a Gradlon which may or may not have been underwater? Surrounded by hostile siblings, who only learned not to openly talk about murdering 'Nil' because Nel slaughtered the last group who did that? Choosing to deal with an atmosphere like that for centuries? Or were they just wandering the world minding their own business, in which case why is that period never referenced, and why bother ever showing up at Lythos? It doesn't give Nel much time to fall in love with Xeno Alear either, when it's said she felt that way for years.

The other possibility – and I've never considered it before, but the Xenologue is SO agonisingly vague with timelines that I suppose it can't be fully discounted – is that Nel and Rafal aren't actually thousand-year-old dragons born during the first war, they're only teenagers born during the second war. But that also doesn't make sense, since it would have necessitated Sombron being around for at least a couple of decades after his return, plus where did the mothers of these brand new children come from? Were they just floating around in possibly-underwater Gradlon, waiting a thousand years to be impregnated while having no ambitions of their own? Or did they get resurrected alongside him in a package deal?

...I really don't think any explanation works, aside from Nel and Rafal being long-term residents of Lythos.

Nel says she cut ties with Sombron during the last war, but you could interpret that as either running away, or openly fighting against him. Sombron, in the flashback that seems to be placed shortly before Xeno Alear kills him, says it had been 'some time' since the twins betrayed him, and that Nil died 'long ago' (yet isn't it the Bracelet of the Three Houses he's shown with, and wasn't that in Divine Dragon hands, so it could be sealed in the Somniel?). Rafal refers to his residence in Lythos as an 'age of lies'. Everything is 'for a time' and 'not long after' without giving numbers, and those phrases become increasingly vague when they're being spoken by individuals who measure their lifespans in thousands of years. We don't even know how long the Divine Dragon has been dead for – months? Years?

'Showed signs of' is another unspecific phrase. You can show signs of something that doesn't actually happen in full until many years later. You can show signs of something you've already been doing for many years in secret. I don't have the energy to compare the JP text and see if there's any differences. Sorry Zelestia, I'm going to have to ignore your single obscure comment as either a mistake by the writing team, or just you being forgetful because you're so old.

Otherwise I'd have to rewrite around 100,000 words of fanfic as not being canon compliant enough, can you imagine the pain of that.

3. In one of Rafal's bond conversations with Emblem Celica, he asks if her warp magic could be used to travel between countries. But isn't that exactly what he does, after showing his true colours in the Xenologue? How else does he transport an unconscious Alear from Elusia to Solm, seal them in the desert ruins, then race all the way back to Elusia in time for Nel to be none the wiser? His later warping has a stronger basis in the game's mechanics (abducting Nel in a way that's similar to an Entrap staff, then blinking over to the Somniel because the previous Divine Dragon must have given him the blessing). But that particular cross-country event? If he can do it regularly, it would also explain how he can rampage around Corrupting the entire world's royals without Nel realising, but hello, where does this power come from? And where does it go, once he's recruited and just has to walk places normally like a loser.

Additionally, I do enjoy when characters say things which are painfully ironic in hindsight. Zelestia saying in an early chapter how it's so fortunate Nel and 'Nil' never lost their other half, and 'Nil' is just like yeah, haha, that sure is great isn't it...

Sadly I will continue to try and deal with Fell Xenologue's problems forever, because it gave us the gift of not one but two hot murderous bisexual dragons acting completely unhinged, and to me that's worth digging through any number of plot holes for.

[hittmeandtellmeyouremine]

ᵎ!ᵎcel's rulesᵎ!ᵎ ﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

ᵎ!ᵎ safe space - my blog is not a place for you to be hateful whatsoever. if you're a trumpie, homophobe, transphobe, sexist, racist, zionist, ablelist, pro-lifer or any of the -ist or -phobes that can't let other people live their lives peacefully, you're not welcome here. i am directly tied to almost every single one of those communities and do not play around with that. don't even try it, i will block you (or worse, rory will see and rip you a new one. don't risk that).

ᵎ!ᵎ boundaries - you guys can ask whatever questions you want and i'll most likely answer them but don't expect me to tell you super personal things. respect my privacy please. if you want to know stuff about me it's all under the '𝗰𝗲𝗹!' tag. you guys can inbox me with personal stuff (girl talk, ask for advice, etc.) if you want. i'm the oldest daughter, i really don't mind.

ᵎ!ᵎ minors - it's not my favorite thing but i was 14 once and lying about my age too so i know some of you won't be 18+. i honestly can't check every single one of you who interacts with me's age but i do ask that you keep the interaction to a minimum if you are underage (this includes ageless blogs too). if you see a post say 'mdni', follow that please.

ᵎ!ᵎ judging - yes, some of my mutuals (and i) write taboo stuff. yes, i'll probably repost it. no, you don't have to read it. no, it's not okay for you to send hate over. it's fiction, it's not real. it doesn't mean that we agree with that stuff irl. you guys would be shocked at some of the stuff i write but can't even fathom doing irl, don't jump to conclusions. if you don't like it, scroll or block.

ᵎ!ᵎ requests - if you're requesting something, please please please be patient with me. i'm a uni student, i have things going on. you'll probably see me bitch about it too so, prepare for that. ↴

ⓘ i'm still learning what i will and won't write with you guys. i've been pretty lucky with the requests i've gotten so far but if there's one i don't think i can do and i say that, please respect that. there have even been occasions where i've gotten a request that i think one of my mooties would better execute so i might even send you over to them.

⊘ don't send a bunch of writers the same request. for one, we'll probably figure it out before we even write it for you. second, it can cause issues, especially if we don't interact with each other. save us the drama.

ⓘ like i said, i have things going on. pay attention to my pinned post to see whether or not my requests are open. once they get to 10+, they'll be closed. more than that will literally send me into an anxiety attack.

⊘ don't ask me to write anything that has to do with bodily fluids, race play, necrophilia, etc. the list will probably be added to as i figure things out. don't be afraid to ask me but also don't be upset if i tell you no. i'll always try to find someone who does write that stuff and send you over that way!

ⓘ i don't only write for rafe, even if he's the majority of my writing. it's just because he's the easiest to write for. y'all i am a fangirl, chances are i probably like who you're thinking of too. i try to stray from writing anything sexual about real people for the time being but again, you can ask!

⊘ all of my readers are imagined to be a woc because i myself am a woc. you'll probably see small descriptions and things that hint at that in my writing. if that's not you, skip over it. do not bitch to me about it because you will be blocked.

ⓘ if you see 'lottie do not read' that's my equivalent of 'dead dove, do not eat'. that means it's taboo content. i've had someone ask about this before so just to give you guys a heads up.

ᵎ!ᵎ blogs - i have three different blogs for different things. if i follow you, it will show up from this blog, even if it's for one of the other blogs. this is my main (and first) one. just keep this in mind!

[madamejadex]

Hi Miss jade!! I’ve got a question

First of all, I really like your blog, I’m very new to all this sort of stuff and I’m trying to understand it better for my girlfriend because she wants me to try some stuff with her and I’m not sure about it so she told me I should look into it.

I’ve seen a few people say stuff about sub drop or dom drop and I was wondering if you could please explain it to me?

I tried to look it up but everywhere said something different and half the results were porn (unhelpful) so I figured I’d ask someone who seems to definitely know what she’s talking about rather than trying to piece it together based on whatever random stuff I find online.

Anyway, thank you for reading my ask! You don’t have to answer it straight away or at all if you don’t want to obviously! I know it’s possibly an uncomfortable question (it was kind of awkward for me at least) but anything for her I guess?

(Side question- should I let her do wax play? Because I don’t think I mind but is that not dangerous at all? It sounds like it’s dangerous)

Hi there, and thank you so much for your message. I’m truly touched that you reached out, and I want you to know right away: there’s absolutely nothing awkward or uncomfortable about asking thoughtful questions like these. In fact, I absolutely love when I get these type of questions.

And I just made a long post which touches on the questions you had. So please look it through: A Deep Dive Into Subspace, Domspace, Subdrop, Domdrop, and Aftercare

Now for your other question about wax play. It’s not a silly question at all, and you’re right to ask.

And I myself love Wax play, and it can absolutely be safe and enjoyable if done carefully. But it’s important to use the right kind of wax and that's never standard candles, as they burn too hot and can cause real burns.

Instead, look for wax made specifically for skin (often labeled “BDSM wax” or “sensual wax”). These melt at lower temperatures and are much safer. Even then, you want to test the temperature on yourself or your partner’s arm before using it in more sensitive areas.

And like everything else in kink, talk about it first. What do you want try out? Where are your limits? Do you want to be the one dripping the wax or receiving it? What safe word or signal will you use if something doesn’t feel right? What do you needs during aftercare? Do you have any triggers, past traumas or mental health issues that might effect the scene?

With the right setup and lots of communication, wax play can be a really sensual experience, but always start slow and never feel pressured.

I want to end this answer by saying this, my dear: You’re already doing something incredibly loving by exploring this world for her and by asking questions instead of pretending to know, you’re showing maturity, humility, and heart. Those are exactly the qualities that make for a safe, wonderful Dominant (if that’s what you choose to explore).

Keep learning, keep asking, and know that you're welcome in my space anytime. You’re doing beautifully.

xo Miss Jade

[rainofdauwuand0w0]

Ive seen the age old question of “which fictional world would be the worst to live in” again and saw a good point made by announcerofgames on TikTok(they are also on youtube and make good warhammer stuff and good halo reviews, check’em out) that technically what is the worst is subjective.

There is the obvious answers like halo where circle-shaped planets destroy you, warhammer 40k is constant bad no matter what, and all the zombie apocalypse of left 4 dead…but he also mentioned how sitting on the crayon drawn seats would be uncomfy in blues clues and how in spongebob you watch the same lesson be learned over and over again.

Oddly enough this angle makes some worlds even more scary.

Let’s take mlp:fim/g4 mlp for a first example, where the world is filled with magical creatures and such, magical sentient beings aswell! Depending on when you are born into this world, you could be enjoying the era of starswirl and all the chaos that comes with that, you might be young enough to see the entirety of g4 happen before your eyes, all the villains, all the chaos, all the enforced order, all the changes to sentient species in your time (diplomatic wise or even physical looks wise).

Thats not even taking into account being born as anything else then a pony, you could be a changling born into the world, and depending when, you could really see the differences in the ages of time periods, kirin, the mermaid/flying ponys of those islands, the yaks, the griffins and their innate greed that they have to battle with every day, the dragons who always has a new rulelr depending on who wins the race, the smaller creatures that do their beet to fly around.

Not to mention all the pests that also have their own magical benefits and sometimes weird ways to deal with them.

For the second ,Pokemon, of course the dex entries show us the dark side and such, but every person who cant respect personal space with a cat or a chihuahua will learn very fucking quick that this world bites back ten times harder in varying ways due to typing.

Third example I will personally wanting to think about is splatoon, sure its probably the best option among these three, a post human world where while you still have to of course participate in the system, the system supports you doing what you love, which has led to the evolution of turf and such, but I have a hunch that sometimes the species of splatoon, do feel like they have some high standards to live up to, the peak of humanity, the good and bad is probably taught from whatever scraps they can find, I bet for some that would be a heavy weight to bare.

[faerienextdoor]

Hi :D can I request a Jujutsu Kaisen matchup? I'm a straight girl with an ISFJ personality. I wear glasses and have a Long curly mohawk haircut. I'm studying animation so I'm interested in any type of art and my dream is to become a writer. I love videogames, anime and superhero movies. I tend to have a resting b!tch face most of the time because I always stress a lot over my studies buy whenever someone talks to me I tend to smile a lot. I tend to be a perfectionist on everything I need to do and can be a loner whenever I need to get stuff done but that doesn't mean I dislike people, it's just hard for me to truly trust and like someone. Thanks! (I wasn't sure of what else to write so if you want more information for the request, feel free to message me! :3)

crawls back into this acc with a jjk fixation...

Let's ignore that answering these matchups have taken over a year. Anyways here u go I hope it's to ur liking!!!!

I match you with....

Nanami Kento

He gets along well with your drive and passion for the arts, even if he necessarily doesn't have the same type of eye for it like you do. When you two started to get to know each other for the first time and he learned of your enjoyment for it, he started to show you pictures of paintings he enjoys.

"This is one of my favorite pieces. Perhaps I can take you to the museum where it's held, hm? I hear there's a new exhibit opening up."

Even if you're not the type to enjoy walking around and staring at art pieces. Which he'd respect OBVIOUSLY. It's just his way of trying to be involved in your hobbies!

But he also knows art can be deeply personal or just something you don't want to share often. So he won't push to see your creations, he definitely urges you to chase those dreams of yours though.

He'd also respect the way you work. If you take on a big project and shut him out entirely during it's duration, he would understand. Just be reasonably worried.

Calls you "my love" a lot and puts the affection on heavy when he checks on you 😭 even if he's just texting. Probably super formal even through messages HAKDHSJD

"My love. Please ensure you've eaten something today. I'll be off work at 8pm, if you feel up to it I can drop by and prepare a late dinner?"

So serious about his love for you.

After a long day of work he might not be into the sound of a movie, but he'd happily collapse into your arms and play with your hair as you engross yourself in whatever you want to watch <3 it's just background noise for him

Stressed from studies or work? He'll massage your shoulders until he feels you sorts go limp from relaxation

"How about I run you a bath?"

Act of service KING

Need help reshaving your mohawk? or just need a trim?

"Well.. I am no stylist, but I can help."

[proceeds to spend like an hour shaving one side of your head because he is also a perfectionist and "won't let you walk around with an uneven haircut" if he's the one doing it]

He's insistent on date nights though. Just to make sure you're not starving yourself from the sun or anything like that. And so he can spend time with you

If you're not feeling social, that's okay. No crazy huge restaurants needed, he'll take you to a park and have a picnic or a nice walk and return home for a dinner he lovingly put together with your help :)

I think him falling for you took time. Not a crazy amount of time, but it took longer to realize it y'know? It hit him though once you started to trust him.

I can see it happening when you're spending an evening together. He's off work and you're taking a break from whatever you had on your plate, laughing about some comment he made. And his heart squeezes a little in his chest when you thank him for spending time with you.

He'd adore you.

I hope u like this omg I'm so so so sorry for it being late ;w; sorry for any typos!

[votederpycausemufins]

Yes I know it's been over a year. Life has been craaaazy. Like I graduated, I got a job, I almost died, I got a new computer, stuff like that. I mentioned some of it in other fic stuff, but maybe you're just here for this scattered fic based on the au from @hermitcraftheadcanons

Fun detail is Evil X and Grum's sections I actually pulled up mc and played to make things more accurate. I mean i messed with my spawn location since you don't normally end up where they did, but otherwise i actually did it.

The Watchers jumped slightly when Xelqua slammed his hand on the table along with a number of papers. “There. All done before the nutshell.”

No one said anything as Zem picked up the papers, reading them over as Xelqua grinned, feathers ruffling excitedly. Yus looked over Zem’s shoulder to read along, sometimes moving the papers to get a look at something they missed. It took a few minutes before Zem handed the whole stack over to Yus so they could really look through it as well as show to the other three. “So, it looks mostly alright, but I want to ask a few things first.”

“Go ahead!” Xelqua happily agreed, quickly building himself a chair and sitting in it, making Zem narrow his eyes.

“First, how were you able to prepare this as fast as you did?”

“Oh, well Mumbo actually wanted to help out. Of course I was suspicious at first, he could have been trying to tweak things in their favor, but he actually made it worse! I mean so many shriekers littered about, prioritizing moving people around, more challenges, he’s even fine with giving the ‘living redstone’ things a downgrade. Oh and not to mention this little tidbit here.” And Xelqua ran over, stealing one of the papers to really let Zemunis look at it. “Adding an extra requirement to this whole thing similar to that little rotator. Meaning it’ll last longer and we’ll get more time to test and research. I mean, this will definitely up the time from around six months.”

“And are you sure that extra time won’t skew our results?”

Quickly, Xelqua’s cheery demeanor turned serious and almost angry. “I’m sorry, are you saying we shouldn’t do this?”

“Well I think he’s just-” Yuslep spoke up before a glare silenced them again.

“We’ve gotten results already. Herobrine has already started giving us answers after who knows how many years you two have tried getting him talking. And now we know that this is the world. If we do anything wrong, They’ll just show up and tell us to stop. Now, not sure if you’ve noticed, but as far as I can tell, They haven’t shown up. And since They haven’t shown up, They probably don’t want us to stop. So until They do, we’re going to keep going. Plus, you agreed to this if I could get the work done, and now I have.”

“Well, you didn’t really get it done. One of the testers did.”

“One who is learning to become a Marked. If we’re going to allow any of them, it would be him. So. Are you allowing this, or not?”

With the current tension in the room, Zem jumped as Pin whispered in his ear. Watchers were fortunately known for their eyes and not their ears, so a hand in front of Pin’s mouth easily made the conversation private from Xelqua. “Look, if one of the hermits planned this all out, it’s obviously something that should help them in the long run, even if Grian can’t see it. And it’s not like the experiment isn’t a mess already with how it’s affected Grian. Noah even just got back and is recovering because whatever’s doing this to Grian messed with him as well. And either way, he’s right about us finally getting information. If you’re worried about the time, all this might end up shorter if we can finally find Them from the experiment.”

Zem was quiet for a few moments, processing all the information before giving a single sharp nod. “Yuslep, send a mass message to the testers once we’re ready to implement the changes. Give them a warning of half an hour, then update.”

“Got it.” Yus agreed before rushing off, beginning to set things up.

After Joe passed out in the tower, Beef struggled getting him back to the village. While he rested, Beef worked on gathering more materials. Around the time Joe finally woke up again, Beef didn’t get a chance to ask for what he had been trying to say earlier because the messages from Doc and Etho started flooding the chat. Immediately Beef crafted an anvil and some stone swords for Joe to use on him, sending some messages to everyone.

While it did work, it was done while Joe was only just waking up, so the action left him tired. At first Beef was the one to let himself die since Joe was still recovering, but it was more important after it was pointed out that hybrids were being affected, which was probably similar to what was wrong with Joe. 

Beef was sure he would be able to ask Joe once he woke up again, but that hope was dashed again when his comm started making noise other than the standard buzzing. The last message that had been sent through deaths was a message from Mumbo, warning that the experiment was going to change up a bit, but it turned out it was coming sooner than anyone thought. Though Beef wasn’t speaking out loud, at the same time he read the message, it seemed like the voice of someone else was reading it off with him.

“As stated previously by a player, an update will occur for the experiment at the request of one of your own. All spawns will be reset but inventories will stay constant. Unregistered players will be registered, creating a total of 30 players. Terrain may be altered, but will for the most part remain unchanged if already explored. Original spawns may also change due to player overlap. The update will occur in half an hour. You have thirty minutes.”

Beef quickly shook Joe awake the rest of the way and they began to gather resources and equipment into their inventories. With the mention of spawns changing due to overlap, especially with the two of them at true spawn as opposed to anywhere else, Beef and Joe were most worried about their spawns changing. 

They, along with anyone else who could, grabbed armor, weapons, tools, blocks, and more, preparing for when the time was up. Coordinates were memorized for meeting points, and a few messages were sent in chat in hopes that it wouldn’t be wiped. And then-

‘Your Server will be Restarted Shortly. Please be patient.’

.

.

.

The mountain was a reluctantly familiar sight. It being devoid of life, however, was not. Sure, there was the weird pillar monument thing from before, plus the bed, but there should be more. “Hello? Is anyone here? Dad? Grum?”

The last thing Jrum remembered was him and Grum seeing a message where someone was killed by a zombie using a named tool. Said tool was listed in chat, which made the two of them realize that renamed weapons or whatever could be used to send actual messages. The problem was you needed an anvil. 

Somehow, he and Grum had managed to imprint some of the letters on and around the pillar to a snowball. Jrum offered to be the one killed for the message, if it could even really be called that. They had done their best to use the odd symbols to look like the word hello, but it didn’t really. 

But even then, he had been killed, and it didn’t look like he had respawed normally as not only did the time seem completely different, but Grum was nowhere to be seen. His next guess was that Grian was right to worry about their respawning and needing to use magic for it, but then Grian didn’t seem to be here either. Did that just mean that normally for them, it would take ages? Did… did Grum think he was dead for good?

But where was Grum? There didn’t seem to be a path down or anything. At least that he could see. But maybe the same thing that happened to him happened to Grum. After he didn’t respawn, Grum would have been alone. And he had to do everything himself until he slipped up. Which meant he was probably just taking his time respawning just like Jrum.

But as he finished that train of thought, he then noticed the amount of death messages appearing in chat. Ones that probably shouldn’t be happening… not with the prior information he knew. Impulse didn’t seem to be drowning, nor was Daddy dying to vindicators. But Xisuma was still being killed by a Warden and Wels to hoglins, so at first it would seem like they escaped their area, but at the same time, there were other messages causing confusion.

Last Jrum knew, it was only the hermits, he and his brother, oh and those two mysterious players Gemini and Pearlescent. But apparently Helsknight was also here now. Also False hadn’t dealt with any other deathloop other than a little bit of drowning at the start, but now she kept dying to something called dripstone. And while Xisuma was still being killed by that warden, now the death message was different mentioning a sonically charged shriek. And finally Zedaph was now being eaten by frogs? For some reason? Jrum didn’t even know what that was!

Jrum was just about to essentially set the messages to a sort of do not disturb so he wouldn’t have to focus on that, but just before he did, a new death message popped up. This wasn’t one of the hermits, nor was it one of the new people. Instead, it was Grum’s name, and he had been killed by a Piglin.

Jrum was immediately looking around. There wasn’t much on the mountain, and he had already looked around, but he had still hoped to either see a nether portal, or see Grum respawn. But neither of those happened. He still looked around expectantly for a few more moments, barely noticing himself starting to shiver before there were more messages of Grumbot getting killed by not only piglins, but hoglin and brutes as well. Jrum almost shut his messages off so he didn’t need to look, but then a single message from Doc came in, saying ‘bot. water.’ and a pair of coordinates, him having gotten an anvil apparently and given a sword to a zombie.

Bot was probably referring to him with the nether not able to have water since now Grum was spawning there for some reason, plus Grum had reported seeing Doc below the clouds. That, along with the fact the coordinates weren’t too far from where he currently stood. In fact they were close enough that he could probably jump to where the water was. Since it would probably be easier to get back up to the mountaintop after going down and hopefully getting resources, Jrum took a running start, then jumped.

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The sky was not black. It was very much blue. Meaning Evil Xisuma had gotten their spawn moved to the overworld. Pretty much the last place they wanted to be. Sort of. They lifted their head to see where exactly they ended up, only to curse when they saw very very large mushrooms. They took it back, this was the last place they wanted to be.

He gave a long sigh, putting his head back down and continuing to lie in the mycelium. “Fuck it, I’ll just kill some mooshrooms and swim elsewhere.” Then after a moment more, they jumped to their feet, running towards what looked like further into the island. Opposed to what the message given to everyone said, EX did not still have his loot from the end city in his inventory, which was going to make any progress to get back there very difficult.

While there were indeed mooshrooms, that was not the only thing present on the island. Standing among the mushrooms, growing from mycelium and not a patch of grass, were some trees. They weren’t trees EX recognized, but they were still some type of tree. “Well I guess I don’t have to swim.”

Instead of attacking the mooshrooms, Xannes started gathering wood. The wood itself seemed to be oak, but the leaves looked the wrong color and shape, plus last they checked, no leaves had flowers blooming in them. Eventually a sort of sapling fell, that being an azalea shrub, whatever that was. But if it could be bonemealed into a tree, it would work. But that meant getting some bonemeal, which meant finding a skeleton. And monsters didn’t spawn on or under mushroom islands.

Or at least that’s what Evil Xisuma thought, because once they had gathered a few trees worth of wood and shrubs as well as some beef and leather, they went down into a surface cave. They were already intrigued by what seemed to be vines glowing further into the cave that they didn’t realize until too late that a skeleton was nearby. At this point, the only gear they had was some leather crafted into boots to potentially help reduce fall damage a tad. They didn’t really have enough to make more, and they didn’t think they would need any.

EX managed to whack the thing once with their axe before getting killed. They grumbled before finding their way back to the cave, managing to grab their stuff and start leaving the cave before getting shot again. Fortunately they weren’t attacked after picking everything up again and instead mined some stone that was further away from the dark part of the cave. 

After getting a good amount, EX crafted a furnace, as well as a stone pick, sword and axe. They grabbed a little bit more wood now that they knew that tools and torches would be more important. The skeleton had moved away a bit, but a creeper was in its place. The creeper exploded around the time the skeleton wandered back over, damaging it a bit more, but it took another hit before the monster was finally dead. 

Xannes ate some of their now cooked beef before realizing that regen still seemed to be disabled in the world, so they couldn’t heal back to full, but at least for now they had about seven hearts. Plus there were no more mobs, and there only seemed to be the one dark area and further into the cave also had the ground above it missing, acting as a sort of skylight.

They used the area as a chance to mine for iron and coal, only to be surprised when the iron wasn’t ore, but some sort of raw iron. It seemed to need to be cooked as well, which didn’t make much sense to them; but it was whatever. They got it cooking before going towards a slightly darker area, now with armor, a shield and an iron axe. There was only one skeleton, but it did give them a bone, which was the point of looking.

Gathering up the last of the cooked iron as well as their utility blocks and some more coal, Xannes had grabbed water from one of the various clay lined pools. There had been a single block leading down to a cave, and right now the goal was to get down to diamond and lava level.

There was a bit of an incident with some mobs at the bottom of the water stream. One of which being a perfect line up to end EX up with a music disk, though it was 11. Further down past that was a more open cave. The greenery, clay and water from before was gone, which would have made it look normal, if it weren’t for the fact that the stone was the wrong color.

Getting distracted, Evil Xisuma looked around, trying to figure out what the weird stone might mean… up until they ran into an exposed piece of diamond ore. And hidden underneath were four more. “Alright, I’ve changed my mind. I ended up in the perfect place.”

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When Grum opened his eyes again, he expected to find himself up on top of the mountain again, hopefully with his brother. From there, it would be easy to make their way back down to where Doc was positioned, assuming the pond they had made was still in place. Unfortunately instead of snow and ice and cold, Grum found his new spawn much hotter, with blackstone around him and the grunts of some nearby piglin.

With no danger immediately present, Grum checked on the world chat messages, noticing that a few players had gotten into death loops again, though some had gotten into new ones as well as some of continued deathloops having some small changes, that mainly being Xisuma’s.

Wondering about his dad, Grum then switched over to the player list, finding all the hermits listed including his dad, though with a different name than usual listed for him. There of course was also Pearl and then the other unfamiliar person, Geminitay, but there were also two newer-ish names. Those names were Helsknight, who was vaguely familiar, but also Xannes, which wasn’t as much. It would just have to be something Grum would ask about if he found anyone.

Well, anyone who was a player, as once he stopped looking at the world chat and tried exploring his spawn, he managed to run into a piglin and got killed. Knowing that path wouldn’t work, Grum attempted to go a different way, but this time he found a hoglin inside the bastion which also made quick work of him. By the time he finally managed to get to a safe area, Grum had been killed by some piglin brutes as well as more deaths from the other two. And if anything, he had been killed by some of the brutes a few times more than the others. Normally he wouldn’t try paying attention to that, but it wasn’t like this world was normal.

Grum finally noticed that the safe area he had found was actually a pretty good place to be. He could hear piglins, sure, but there were none in sight, even despite the fact that there was a chest right there. He carefully listened around to figure out how close the piglins were before opening the chest, getting prepared to run. He knew enough to recall that piglins did not like you rooting through their chests, so they could show up when he did. 

After a few seconds with the chest opened, nothing arrived, so Grum carefully looked inside, still keeping an eye on the surrounding area. The two most important items to him were a gold sword and a golden apple, a weapon and a way to heal since regen still seemed to be off. There were also a decent amount of arrows and a pair of crossbows, which were also helpful, though Grum wasn’t sure how well he could use them. As for the rest of the items in the chest, Grum collected up some golden carrots, some string, a singular pork chop, two iron nuggets, a handful of bone blocks, and some crying obsidian, but most importantly, there was some regular obsidian as well.

If Grum could find a ruined portal, or just more obsidian and enough stuff for a flint and steel, he would be able to create a portal and escape. Unfortunately, that all hinged on him actually getting out of the bastion alive as well, since he would lose all the items if he did die. There was the potential of dying so many times the piglins accepted him as one of their own, but he wasn’t really looking forward to the possibility of being part mob. If he even could become part mob when he was a robot and not a regular player.

From where Grum stood, he could just barely make out a chest on the other side of the bastion. He couldn’t see any piglins directly between it and him, but who knew what would be on the way there, and if he could even easily get there since there was also a large pool of lava in the middle as well. It was surrounding some netherwart, so that meant there was a platform, but that would likely be soul sand which would slow him and- he was overthinking this.

Steeling himself, Grum loaded both of his crossbows before running towards the chest. Almost immediately a piglin was in his way, and Grum turned to try and run away from it before getting cornered. With no other option, he fired his crossbow and was relieved when the single arrow was able to kill the piglin. Unfortunately, in running, he had fallen down a level, which hadn’t hurt him, but there was now a wall keeping him from getting directly to the chest. Loading the crossbow again, Grum carefully made his way around the wall through thin corridors, expecting danger at every turn.

Finding another dead end, Grum turned around, only for an armored piglin to see him. With two more arrows and a swipe from his sword, Grum killed it, but not before taking some damage. He barely had time to load his crossbow again before another piglin armored appeared with a brute by its side. Miraculously, Grum was able to hit the brute into the lava pool and kill the piglin, even getting its golden chestplate, which he immediately threw on. Just in time as third piglin appeared, this one with no armor but a crossbow of its own. Grum only had his sword ready, so sliced at it, getting shot once in the process, but not being killed. 

With no more threats immediately appearing, Grum ate his apple, glad for the healing to take him back to full hearts and then a little. Another piglin with a crossbow saw Grum as he made his way to another alcove. Grum managed to take one of his bone blocks to block a gap for them to see him from, but in the process found some magma flooring, taking just a touch of damage before he was safe again, hearing the piglin killed by a hoglin.

From his new place, Grum could see another chest in the middle of the lava, which unfortunately was now further away from him than where he had started. It was something he could try to get to if he died again, but that was still thankfully an if. The regular path continued into a dead end until Grum went up a level, but he could hear more piglins there, so instead he used his other two bone blocks to bridge a small gap towards another opening.

Using a touch of crying obsidian as well as punching through some blocks with his hand, Grum ran into another piglin, and only barely stopped himself from firing his crossbow before noticing that he wasn’t being attacked thanks to his stolen armor. Unfortunately, the same didn’t work for brutes, and there was one between him and the chest. Thankfully, it couldn’t reach where he stood, but Grum knew opening the chest would also anger the piglins, so he had to take his next steps very carefully.

The moment he attacked the brute, all the piglins get angry with him. With some panic, Grum managed to get them all to walk into a pit where they could get in and out, but couldn’t get to him. Barely dodging an arrow, Grum managed to attack with his sword, and then watched in surprise as pretty much all the piglins found a puddle of lava and fell into it.

As Grum continued to pick off piglins, a baby hoglin dropped in on him, barely loading his crossbow in time to hit it before it thankfully ran into the pit as well. Finally, Grum reached the chest, and then yelled in frustration at the items inside. The most useful items were more bone blocks as well as chains, as he could build across gaps with them, but the piglin disc and other gold chestplate weren’t as helpful. Well, Actually his stolen one was almost broken, so he did replace it, but it was still lacking.

With some reluctance, Grum made his way to the center chest, picking up the growing netherwart as well. Taking a deep breath, he went to open the chest, only to get killed by a piglin brute that fell from above. Feeling angry as he respawned, Grum didn’t even hesitate as he rushed back and shoved the brute into the lava, picking up what remained of his own items. Thankfully the new chestplate still survived along with his obsidian. In fact, while his sword had fallen in lava as well as one crossbow, the other crossbow survived with the arrows. And as Grum opened the chest, he doubled his obsidian as well as got a gold axe.

With enough obsidian to make a portal, Grum smiled before frowning at the fact that holding the axe felt a bit more comfortable than the sword or crossbow. He hoped maybe it was just his own imagination, but Grum couldn’t be sure. But not wanting to dwell on it or get the chance to die again, Grum immediately used his obsidian to make a portal frame. Though he couldn’t light it, it was at least there, so Grum stood on top to fire arrows at the rest of the piglins and brutes and hoglins, taking the last few out with punches into lava when his arrows finally ran out.

Feeling safer, Grum explored a bit more. There were unfortunately no more chests, but Grum did find where what seemed to be every remaining piglin seemed to be. He did his best to block up the area with bone blocks, but one brute escaped, which killed him twice before he finally killed it in return. But with that, he was safe. There weren’t any more hoglins or brutes, and the only remaining piglins were children and didn’t attack him. They seemed scared of him, which was reasonable since he had just killed what seemed to be their family. 

He felt a little sad for them, but he had to do it to survive. With some reluctance, Grum picked up the chests he had emptied and took them to his spawn point. He was still stuck here, but he had the beginnings of a way out, and that was progress, and progress was good.

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He was willing to admit that he had lied a little with what he had said to Wels. After the warning of the soft reset, Hels had reluctantly helped with obtaining stone tools for himself and Welsknight. He also did his best to kill a couple of hoglins and pass the pork off with a reminder that starving was probably a better option than eating crimson fungus.

It was midway through trying to make sure Wels' spawn was safe when it happened. One moment Hels was in the nether placing blocks, the next he was in the overworld, and with his inventory completely empty. Great, so the part about him keeping his stuff was a lie. Which made things a lot worse for him.

When he had tried to claim that needing to keep Wels from dying just wasted resources he could have used for himself, that wasn't entirely the case. While his name was Helsknight, it was in part because he was from a sort of alternate universe or whatever that was referred to as hels. Going between the two places wasn't common. He had ended up there in the first place because of one of the Hermits' inventions, and was only back due to Evil Xisuma. The only reason he had been doing so well in the nether was because Evil X had insisted on modding one of their seasons with the nether. Because that dimension wasn't normally a part of hels.

Helsknight himself, despite being named after the alternate universe or whatever that didn't have the nether, had actually been from a world that had also been modded with the fiery dimension. Which, if he knew enough about how things worked, Wels was in the same situation, being from a world that had added in the connections to an extra dimension. Still, the dimension that Hels had grown up with didn't exactly match the present day nether of wels, but for whatever reason, Evil X had wanted to be nice and give a slice of home to the knight. It had felt off since it was made to match the new version of things, but now Hels appreciated the gesture.

It still hadn't exactly matched with the nether Hels had found himself in before, but it gave him some familiarity with the dimension he had found himself in. But emphasis on had. Because now he found himself in the overworld in a biome he didn't fully recognize. And that would be bad enough if it weren't also for the fact that he wasn't exactly sure how to actually survive.

Okay, that was sort of hyperbole, but it was still going to be tough. From what Hels had learned after his first visit to wels, there hadn't originally been a separation between the two dimensions. But sometime around the addition of a new dimension, the split happened. Since then, the two dimensions had stayed separate, and what might be discovered in one of the worlds would have a different equivalent in the other.

Like for instance, apparently they had spruce and birch instead of pine and sycamore. If something that small was different, what else was he going to deal with? Well for one, probably the bird a couple of blocks away from him. He looked at it and it looked back, but nothing happened, so it probably wasn’t hostile. He then looked around at the landscape, hoping to spot some kind of landmark, only to be disappointed by finding just one. 

Just like at Wels’ spawn, a similar pillar thing stood just behind where Hels appeared. But unlike the netherbrick of the other one, this was made mainly from a type of wood he can’t recall the name of. It’s orange wood, but the bark is more of a gray. The only things not like that are the piece of bedrock and the strange block on top of it that looked like weird dirt or stone.

As far as Helsknight could tell, he couldn’t get anything out of the small structure other than being able to see his spawn. Maybe that meant he should build his base there, but he needed to gather wood first. So, Hels started walking to the nearest tree, punching at the logs that matched what the spawn marker was made of. When he finally picked them up, he noted that they were ‘acacia’ before turning them into a crafting table and set of wooden tools.

Chopping down another tree, Hels used the planks to outline where his base would be before digging at the group below until he hit stone, then continued to mine that up until he could change to a stone pickaxe and make a furnace. He popped back up to the surface to place the untility block next to his crafting table, also making and placing a chest for good measure.

Digging randomly for coal wasn’t really the best option in the moment, so after stuffing the extra cobble and dirt into the chest, Hels went looking for a shallow cave in hopes of finding some coal ore. Thankfully it didn’t take long, and he mined it up and crafted a number of torches. One was placed in the cave opening to help it stand out, and he placed a small trail on the way back to his base for the same reason.

While placing one in the center of his outlined area, Hels frowned at where it was now suddenly broken. For whatever reason, a few of the blocks he had placed were just missing now. He couldn’t really see why, but Helsknight placed more blocks in the gap. After that, he added a second layer of blocks to make sure there was a wall to hopefully keep out any monsters once night finally hit.

Now that Hels had a number of torches, he continued his staircase in the spawn area. If he could find a cave below his spawn, then he wouldn’t need to go exploring too far. And with regen off, if he died, it would be fairly easy to return to where he had been. But that meant finding a cave in the first place.

For now, he was having very little luck. Helsknight had only managed to find two pieces of iron ore, and he had no clue what to do with the raw iron that had dropped. Even if it worked like regular iron ingots, what was he supposed to do with shears? As Hels tried to potentially come up with any idea, his train of thought stopped in its tracks when he reached the surface. In the same area as before, the planks making the wall for his temporary base were gone.

Helsknight stared at the gap in the wall, trying to figure out why it was there again. His first guess was the strange bird he had seen earlier, but at this point, it had wandered off far enough that he couldn’t see it anywhere nearby. With another glance, he noticed how that side of his wall was closer to the spawn structure than the rest of it. Probably nothing could be within a certain distance of the thing. 

With a frustrated sign, Hels tore up what remained of that wall and expanded it. He was still going to enclose the thing to some degree. It was his spawn, and the thing was important enough that protecting it was probably the safest option.

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The first time he had seen a player was a surprise, leaving quickly enough he was pretty sure he wasn’t spotted. The next time he wasn’t as sure, but couldn’t tell. The third and fourth times he knew they didn’t, but the fifth time he knew he had been seen.

He had been alone for a long time, on his own and sometimes managing to find himself in different worlds. Sometimes, those worlds included other people. And when those people saw him, they talked about him. Those talks ended up connecting to more things they had spotted, things he had left behind like little tunnels or small builds. He didn’t think it would amount to much, until the first time a player appeared in the world he was in, instead of the other way around.

That had been this world. Ages and ages ago. When the first Watcher had appeared. They did something to him that day. They essentially laid a curse upon him, one he was stuck with for ages. Technically, he was still stuck with it, but it had been lessened. At most he could say it left him feeling sick for a day or so. And part of that was because of how accommodating his current home was.

Well, it wasn’t really current now. This world wasn’t supposed to be their home. And it seemed someone had noticed the little fix that had been given to his curse. The Watchers were running the show after all. They wouldn’t want something like that messed with if they hadn’t been the ones fixing it.

But he didn’t know it had happened until it was too late. The idea only crossed his mind near the end of their timer. He did his best to rush back to a piece of safety, hoping to ride out what he thought was coming. Surely he could be taken care of for a little bit. That’s what hermits did after all.

He called out to Beef in time for him to turn around right as the server reset began. And when everything was set back to normal, only one hermit remained at the true spawn. And due to the message given previously, Beef sadly assumed that the other Hermit had ended up with a moved spawn.

But that wasn’t the case. He hadn’t moved spawns, but he was no longer at the true spawn. He was nowhere. 

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