#why don't i make this distinction with insects and arachnids
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I know this makes me some sick sort of freak or whatever but the thought of this wretch dying via centrifugal vacuum laundering is so nice. I try not to indulge the sadist but this one this one felt good. This one felt really good.
#i should let it spin a bit more for good measure just in case#will I go to hell for desecrating the insects corpse?#this thing probably had a right to exist#too bad it was at the wrong place at the wrong time#too bad too bad#really such a shame#a better person might have let it live#a better person might have just felt relief at its death instead of glee#to marvel at the ''how'' instead of the plain ''that''#well worse people than me have gained absolution#I'm not religious but lets jusg ignore thaz for a sec okay this is about the melodrama of it all#partially#i do think this is a really vile character trait of mine#this habit of mine to enjoy the final struggle of poor insects i mean#but it's interesting to know that my reasoning of “kill them so they can't return and do it slowly so I can feel good about it too'' is#the same that some people use to justifiy war crimes#i know I'm reflected enough to stop i know i could just let them leave and they'd be fine outside#but i prefer them trapped under a glass for days so I can watch them whither away#why?#you know? why?#i would never do something like that with people i would never do something like that with small animals as well or reptiles or fish#although i do find it a little funny to see the fish out of water and the way they squirm#in the end i am aware thaz that is cruel and they need to either be killed fast or be thrown back into the watee#why don't i make this distinction with insects and arachnids#because I just don't care for them? I don't care much for fish or geckos either#but I'd never sit next to a street of geckos and drop rocks on them one by one#i would do that to ants#have done so. as a child but still#i guess at the end of the day i just don't see any redeeming qualities to spiders or houseflies or some of the such#which is odd but I've reached tag limit and through such my ability to think about this further
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More more Stark's Mind notes eps 9-14
Episode 9
“Have you guys ever heard of Felix Freeman?” FELIX MENTION. Talks about him like they were friendly/friends
“Just don't get discouraged by that man's words.” I stg it sounds more like he's telling that to himself than the little survivor group he has
“Just keep going. Whether you have to help someone, or kill someone, there's one clear goal in mind.” Oh 💔
“Just don't let up, Stark. Don't give in.” He's trying to make himself feel better </3
“We would've been out of here if someone had one god damned key.” Key's would help if the locks were on your side of the door
“Just don't mind the neurological stress this whole thing has had on me.” And it's gonna get WORSE from here
“People like them are counting on me. And I swear, I will get through this, I will. I have to. It's my responsibility.” He's putting so much on himself god
Episode 10
“What do they use? Echolocation?” I have no clue about the Black Mesa headcrab models, but the og Headcrab models do actually have eyes! They're on its front pincers(?) and are pretty small
“I wish I knew how to do a pull-up.” Again, twink.
“You can never hate Mr. Whiskers.” CAT PERSON 🐱 (cat-bo💥)
“Sorry, insects and arachnids.” Very important to make that distinction
“I concur.” STUPID FUCKING NERD ASS (/aff)
‘can you access the mail server?’ “That's not helping!” I just found that interaction funny lmao
Episode 11
“So as of right now, when I get to the surface I'll have to deal with being an imposter, PTSD, the deaths of several employees, and an alien invasion. Oh and that whistle blowing thing from back then.” The whistle blowing thing???
“I can already see the headlines. ‘Charming physicist saves entire facility.’” Sir, your ego is showing.
5 grenades used before he gives up on trying to blow the turret up with one. Please learn to conserve your shit I'm begging 💔
Gets shot somewhere by the turret (probably on face? He says he felt it)
“Once I get out… Well, if I get out. Correction.” Give yourself some more credit man </3
Episode 12
“I might be overthinking this whole thing!” About seeing someone from the ‘rescue team’ shoot a scientist
2 ear injuries! Both ears are injured
“Christ my ears…” There's no way he doesn't have some form of hearing damage from all of this
“Somebody should supply the military with a fucking thesaurus.” *cough* Yore dead Freeman *cough*
“I still don't know how I'm doing this!” Fear and adrenaline is one hell of a combo
“I was at the wrong place at the wrong time, and somehow… I really shouldn't dwell on that kind of thinking too much. Usually that kind of thinking leads you to your death.” Oh ☹️
Episode 13
“I'm being a bit overdramatic, aren't I?” HAVE YOU SEEN THE SITUATION YOU ARE IN?
“There's also no point fighting scared civilians either!” sir you are way past the point of being a civilian?
“It's kill or be killed.” No actual comment, I just like how he says it
Episode 14
He's… so, so dumb sometimes (presses a random button without knowing what it would do)
“This is how I would envision a railway system set deep underground.” That's… so specific cause what else would that be.
His reaction to the actual tram is so <3 cause it's the only time in this whole series he finds something amusing (which I mean, fair tbh)
“My nose is bleeding because of the sheer amount of rage and frustration that I am going through right now.” Fun fact, stress can actually cause/worsen nosebleeds! So rip man
“I am the embodiment of anger.” I am so sorry but he's so cringe sometimes please shut up (/lovingly)
“See! That's not real- it's real.” I have so many questions. Why does Black Mesa just, have that much toxic waste??
“Until I become suicidal or something.” You… aren't already?
#stark's mind#vincent stark#mindverse#I'm gonna try making my notes 6 eps instead of the 4 I was doing before
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