#wired modems

[lumashoes]

i hate wireless earbuds they piss me off so bad

[ballwizard]

📦

ERMMM

[aud-chron-images]

[pirefyrelight]

It only took 4 hours or so but I finally got Ambrosia to recognize that wifi is a thing she can theoretically do, and by all metrics except for actually loading websites it seeps to be working? Console commands return info they weren't before, the icon on the taskbar shows full connection. I got her here by tethering wifi through my phone, (which was honestly way easier than I thought it was going to be, but even then results are spotty there too) and running the built in updater.

Also I'm sure the threat of reinstalling mint by downloading a fresh version to a thumbsstick from my laptop helped. The psychological warfare or whatever.

[the-hwaelweg]

So our ISP forced us to switch to quantum fiber/6G, which thus far feels like a rip off and a worse experience than our old 5G regular modem.

But then, my holiday/"everything is truly horrible but we gotta make it through" gift to myself was to finally splurge on a PS5.

It arrived today and naturally it won't connect to the new wifi. Even when it is physically jacked into the modem (which of course is in the pantry/junkroom in the basement), it says the wifi signal is too weak. Sony assures me the PS5 is working as intended (it does recognize a wired connection, though this involves a MacGyvered set up and the sacrifice of a work monitor so is NOT a solution), so I guess we're calling the ISP tomorrow.

I would just like one single thing to go right in my life right now. Just one.

[bynineb]

WYURM

ELECTRIC - VOLT ABSORB

It chews out a portion of a wire before connecting itself to either end, draining power while allowing some to flow through to avoid suspicion. If they happen to prey on a fiber optic cable, the internet's wicked influence will quickly drive them mad.

LYVWYURM

ELECTRIC/DARK - DOWNLOAD

Cruelly digs its spiky body into its prey before flooding them with dark electricity. If it's in a pinch, it will connect its tail to a modem to flood the internet with lies about its opponents.

[foone]

The hardest part of having sex with other robots is finding the right serial port adapters.

DB9 vs DB25, rs232 vs rs485, null modem vs straight wired, rs232 vs ttl levels... It's so complicated

[backwardshatnick]

𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗋𝖾 𝖻𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗎𝗉 (𝖻𝗎𝗍 𝗂 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗄 𝗂 𝖺𝗆 𝗌𝗆𝗂𝗍𝗍𝖾𝗇)

in which matt works for a call centre of your phone operator.

pairing: call centre representative!matt x customer!reader wc: 1.7k notes: fluff, flirty!matt, frustrated!reader (it's just lacking another one of my favourite F words), use of the name bernard, mention of physics that gives me whiplash 🤓 series masterlist can be found here! [divider credits to: @strangergraphics]

“Shoot,” you grunted, sigh after sigh leaving your mouth before you screamed into your pillow. Your hair was a mess, the mug of warm lavender tea long forgotten and cold by the table lamp while your laptop screen was stuck with the face of your Classical Mechanics professor but his booming voice still on-going despite the scratchy and crackly quality until it finally stopped.

You had done all your due diligence, rebooting the modem, resetting your router, checking your network configurations and even switching to the dorm’s weak internet to your own phone hot spot, but nothing was working despite the full four white bars next to the name of your phone operator company’s name, Cell4. Leaving the dorm just to go to campus’s library is a hassle as this lecture was about to end in 45 minutes. Scrolling through your contacts, you finally found the Customer’s Support number from Cell4 that had been automatically saved when you had registered for your phone number the very first time you held the small pink Samsung in between your fingers.

The dial tone was crisp and audible, the typical hold music dancing through your ears before you were greeted with a woman’s synthetic voice asking you to press certain numbers to fit which representative you were supposed to solve your mobile issues with. It did not take long as you finally heard a gentle and warm voice saying, “Thank you for calling Cell4, this is Bernard speaking. How can I brighten your day today?”

On Bernard’s, or Matthew’s side, there was a moment of static, a slight spark followed by a small, frustrated sigh crackling through the line.

You finally stood up from the wooden floor of your room, back now resting against your bed with your index and thumb softly pinching your nose to ease the stress. “Hi, uh, sorry. I think my internet’s having an absolute meltdown. I’ve tried everything but it seems like I have to use the dial-up internet cause it’s acting like it’s stuck in 2009.”

Matt leaned back in his headset, the corner of his mouth rising up into a cheeky smile after making out the frazzled but clearly young voice. This was finally his time to shine and crack some jokes that were rarely appreciated by his older customers. He cracked his knuckles before clearing his voice to answer, “No worries at all. You’re talking to someone who as a kid dialed his computer teacher in primary school thinking that the internet was monitored by them. You’re in absolute good hands, miss.”

A chortle fuzzed through his headset as you replied with a similar manner to ease the situation, “Are you guys trained to do that? It’s in the manual?”

“Oh, absolutely. Step one: sound vaguely competent and then proceed to step two…” Matt said, his voice trailing off, making you curious.

“Bernard? Are you still there?”

“I was just messing with you. Step two was actually to charm the caller until they forget why they called and were mad in the first place.”

You couldn’t hold in your laughter, bright and clear through your receiver which made Matt break into a wide gummy grin, “Alright, alright Bernard from Cell4. How do we fix this?”

Matt chuckled on the other end, flipping through a binder that had the step-by-step guide to fix your potential problem. Although he knew everything by heart and memory, it was always a habit of him to have something to fiddle with in his hands, which was partly a reason why he got transferred to customer service when his supervisor had found him tampering with the wires and chargers of the display phones.

The sound of the crisp pages flipping could be heard on your end, your dubiousness slowly growing as the phone call quality was oddly good. But it all soon went away as Matt asked you his first question.

“Well, I am going to be asking you some highly complicated and mysterious questions, like… is your modem plugged in?”

“Wow, so we’re going straight to the hard stuff, huh?” “I told you, we’re not playing games here,” Matt answered, fingers still folding and unfolding the corners of the customer guide.

The call proceed for the next six minutes, him guiding you through restarts, reboots, resets and other obscure steps involving buttons and wires you had no idea even existed. Despite his constant jokes, Matt still explained things clearly and earnestly, never sounding annoyed and even calling the internet an “anxious printer who can sense your fear.”

With his guidance, your frustration soon fizzled away. Your complaints and whining disappearing and replaced with strings of laughter and pain in the cheeks. You were sure that your left shoulder was going to be strained tomorrow morning from constantly leaning your neck against it to support your phone in between your ear, but Matt was making it all worth it. Eventually, his help had paid its price when you could see not only he face of your professor, but also his slides where he had already jotted with scribbled numbers, enthralling mathematical symbols and diagrams which could easily be mistaken with a 19th century mathematical discovery.

Matt could hear the voice resonating from your laptop and uttered, “Finally back from the digital afterlife?”

“Thank you so, so much Bernard,” you said, hoping the smile that you had on your face could somehow be heard through his headset, “I can now finally continue listening to my riveting lecture on Euclidean space.”

“Whoah, slow down there Einstein. It’s part of my job. I only expect a Bernard shoutout when you get to do your valedictorian speech,” he teased.

You let out a soft giggle, “I definitely would. After thanking my pug, Mr. Winston and the girl who wiped the lipgloss of my teeth during orientation.”

He stood up for a moment to straighten his back and excitedly answered upon hearing the word ‘pug’.

“Wait, you have a pug called Mr. Winston? I have a stuffed pug called Mr. Wrinkleton!”

“For real?” you said, back straightened as well. “And you’re not offended that you’re gonna be the third person I thank in my speech?”

“You got me with the pug so it doesn’t matter anymore,” he chimed, the gummy smile still evident on his face.

Your face was also plastered with a grin, the excitement buzzing through your body. Bernard, or Matt, is an anonymous entity, but the thrill of his anonymity, with no face claim gives you a kick of confidence to enjoy the conversation without having to be worried about being perceived. The silent pause that you both shared was not awkward, but you both knew that his job here was done but none of you were quite ready to hang up just yet.

Until Matt broke it first.

“So… I can’t legally say this or HR is gonna be at my as- I mean my coattails,” he corrected, knowing that all his conversations are indeed recorded if complaints were to arise from a poor survey and one-star review to the company. “But I feel like I owe it to the future valedictorian that your laugh might’ve fixed my boring night more than I fixed your internet.” You blink once. Twice. Your cheeks now reddening.

“Are you flirting with a customer, Bernard?”

“I am just expressing my appreciation, professionally, for the sporting attitude and well-timed giggles that we had shared, professionally again, of course,” Matt answered proudly.

You laughed again, this time louder before coming up with an equally charming and professional reply, “Well, Bernard from Cell4, I would say that you are my go-to if I ever need help with anything.”

“You know my number. Same jokes, same charm every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday until 7pm.”

There was slight hesitation when you wanted to answer him, but you only live once and it had been a long while since you had such a good laugh now that it is almost finals season.

“Hey, so, um… I know that there’s going to be a survey at the end of this call and my internet package is limited to only 50GB per month… Do you think I can get bonus data if I say that you’re very, very, very helpful and maybe also kind of cute?” you said, stretching the ends of your words.

Matt was basically cheesing now through the mic, now clearing his throat before muttering, “Only if you spell ‘cute’ in all caps.”

“100%,” you replied, the physics lecture only now jumping into your senses when you could hear the professor mentioning the potential topics during your exam, “I should probably go now and pretend to be a competent student.”

“And I should go back and take another call while pretending to be a competent calls rep who pretends to not miss this one.” You could hear your heart skip a beat, the warmth coming up to your cheeks as your stomach felt giddy with butterflies.

This is just another phone operator representative. A different kind of smooth operator.

“Talk soon, maybe?”

He chuckled, “Only if you’re breaking up now. Because I think I am smitten.”

“Bye, Bernard,” you giggled, tapping on your phone to let the call end before he could give you another one of his charms, fingers immediately going to fill in the survey as your lecture played in the background like a podcast.

You knew that Cell4 usually sends in a reply whenever a survey has been successfully received, but this time it was a lot special. And unusually fast.

Putting down the pen that you had in your hand from copying your professor’s slides, you tapped on the green Messages app where you got a text from Cell4.

Thank you for your call. We hope your connection stays strong. P.S.: And so should ours. - M. Bernard ;)

Maybe losing the internet was not so bad after all.

But is M his last name, or is it Bernard? The curiosity itched your brain, but you knew that you could count on your detective of a best friend to search for him on Instagram.

The internet really does wonders to people, doesn’t it?

📤 @vanteguccir

[cyberpunkonline]

10 CYBERPUNK ARTISTS THAT'LL JACK INTO YOUR SKULL AND REWRITE YOUR TASTE IN MUSIC

Your auditory implants won’t know what hit ‘em.

Right then, reader — pull up your faux-leather trousers and strap on your chrome-plated headphones. We’re blasting through the corrupted circuits of the 2025 underground, bringing you 10 contemporary artists who sound like they’re scoring a riot in Neo-Tokyo while being hacked in real time. Yes, there’s synths. Yes, there’s screaming. No, Grimes isn’t on this list.

MACHINE GIRL Genre: Gabberpunk, Cybercore, ADHD-core Ever wanted to be mugged in a server room by a rave demon? Machine Girl has you covered. It’s breakbeats plus punk plus absolute chaos. Every track is a manic assault from a frothing modem on fire. Start with “MG Ultra” — it's like doing parkour through a collapsing arcade. Machine Girl is a project from New York-based Matt Stephenson, who started it in 2013. What began as breakcore mutated fast into a multi-genre freakout. Live performances are frenzied, sweaty, and borderline ritualistic, often featuring live drums and mosh pit energy in tiny venues. Bandcamp: https://machinegirl.bandcamp.com Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/0WwSkZ7LtFUFjGjMZBMt6T

TENGUSHEE Genre: Faewave, Electrofolk, Cyberdrift, Post-Ratcore This glitching shadow-beast of the net is what happens if a faerie takes too many digital drugs and starts a resistance movement in a cursed VR chatroom. Tengushee doesn’t just cross genres — they light them on fire, digitise the ashes, and make a concept album out of it. Expect story-driven drops, haunted samplers, and the occasional whisper from the void. Tengushee operates like a ghost in the wires, often dropping full-concept albums with narrative arcs tied to multimedia projects, zines, or even encoded tone signals. Based somewhere between London and Faewave, their work includes collaborations with glitch-artists and mythmakers, crafting a world as deep as it is weird. Bandcamp: https://tengushee.bandcamp.com Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/5pPzJk8q2YbVRo3dEiE5rZ

PERTURBATOR Genre: Darksynth, CyberGoth Former black metal guitarist turns synth wizard and soundtracks the end of civilisation in style. Every track feels like the opening credits to a forbidden anime you found on a hacked VHS tape. His recent albums dip into goth rock, coldwave, and grim industrial — a sonic warehouse rave thrown inside a haunted monolith. James Kent is the man behind Perturbator, rising out of the French synthwave explosion in the early 2010s. What set him apart was the sheer cinematic density of his work, as well as his willingness to evolve. His later albums feel like full-blown existential crises scored with analog doom. Bandcamp: https://perturbator.bandcamp.com Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/0O02jvPzKT1kQEYg5XEqRA

GUNSHIP Genre: Synthwave with Dad Issues Think “Stranger Things” but horny for Blade Runner. GUNSHIP slaps synth arpeggios across your face while whispering movie references into your ear. Songs like “Tech Noir” and “Dark All Day” are pure neon cocaine. Bonus points for the video with Tim Capello, the sax guy from The Lost Boys. Formed in the UK, GUNSHIP emerged from the ashes of alternative rock band Fightstar. What they lacked in punk energy, they made up for with lush synth arrangements and cinematic ambition. With vocal guests ranging from horror icons to YouTube animators, they’re a love letter to analog future-fantasies. Bandcamp: https://gunshipmusic.bandcamp.com Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/3dD9W6Gh8Mo9Tu4S7ydz8q

SHREDDER 1984 Genre: Darksynth, CyberMetal French producer who mashes heavy metal energy into a screaming cyberpunk blender. His album "Dystopian Future" is all dark atmosphere and adrenaline. This is music for doing squats with a neural interface strapped to your head. Shredder 1984 is exactly what it says on the tin: shred. A project born from metal roots but raised on VHS aesthetics and neon grime, Shredder builds tracks that feel like boss fights in an underground data vault. Occasionally throws in face-melting guitar solos for good measure. Bandcamp: https://shredder1984.bandcamp.com Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/2YlR5FzF4XWgeXGxR2b3Vh

REVOLTING PUPPETS Genre: Cyberpunk Punk These Swiss psychos deliver rebellious punk fused with grinding electronics. The kind of band that would stage-dive into a riot squad. Add in LED helmets and maximum cyber attitude and you’ve got a live act worth risking a black eye for. Born in Bern, Switzerland, the Puppets are part cyber-art project, part live-action political tantrum. The band leans hard into performance art, complete with backstories and a lore-rich website that feels like an ARG. Think Rage Against the Machine, but upgraded with malware. Website: http://revoltingpuppets.com

CLIPPING. Genre: Sci-fi Horror Rap Experimental hip hop trio fronted by Daveed Diggs that brings tales of malfunctioning AIs, haunted ships, and cosmic terror over glitch-heavy beats. Their albums feel like audio novellas for doomed protagonists. Start with "There Existed an Addiction to Blood" or "Visions of Bodies Being Burned." clipping. formed in Los Angeles, with William Hutson and Jonathan Snipes providing the surgical, abrasive production. Their use of silence, static, and horror tropes makes them unique in the rap world. And yes, Diggs was in Hamilton, but don’t let that fool you — these guys write soundtracks for existential dread. Bandcamp: https://clppng.bandcamp.com Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/7cNNNhdJDrt3vgQjwSavNf

BEAST IN BLACK Genre: Cyber Metal, Synth Power If you're into big riffs, bigger vocals, and synths that sound like they were mined from an alien war machine, Beast in Black delivers. Their album "Dark Connection" is basically a concept record about AI girlfriends and cyber-samurai. Finnish-Greek metal band formed by former Battle Beast guitarist Anton Kabanen, Beast in Black are unapologetically bombastic. They mix anime aesthetics with power metal drama, and if you can get past the over-the-top vocals, you’ll find a band that gets how to marry synths with shredding. Website: https://beastinblack.com Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/5wJ1z2KgFvb1GQ9ApnFlog

OKLOU Genre: Glitchpop, Cyberambient A softer, prettier ghost in the machine. Oklou blends vaporous vocals with ambient electronics and medieval fantasy energy. It’s like if a fairy princess got lost inside a Sega Dreamcast. Oklou is the moniker of French artist Marylou Mayniel. With classical music training and a background in club culture, she creates tracks that are emotionally dense but digitally fragile. Her work occupies the misty edges of cyberpunk, where romance and signal loss overlap. Bandcamp: https://oklou.bandcamp.com Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/1FqqOl9itIUpXr4jZPIVoT

NAZAR Genre: Deconstructed Club, Warwave Amsterdam-based producer with beats sharp enough to cut through reinforced concrete. Inspired by war, trauma, and classic cyberpunk anime. His upcoming album "Demilitarize" might be the most realistic sonic vision of future conflict you’ll hear this year. Nazar was born in Angola and raised in Europe, and his music reflects that blend of postcolonial tension and Western club evolution. His productions on labels like Hyperdub use field recordings, mechanical rhythms, and unflinching political commentary. Harsh, heavy, and honest. Bandcamp: https://nazarmusic.bandcamp.com Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/1pQWsZQehhS4wavwh7Fe8D

[angelirot]

Names, Pronouns, Titles relating to; glitches and tech.

︵︵ names :

Analogue，Audio，Binary，Blackout，Bug，Byte，Cody，Deus，Digital，Errorette，EXE，Hacker，Lab，Lag，Link，Machina，Malware，Mechesse，Modem，Monitor，Nano，PC，Pixella，Video，Viruse，Webette，Widgette，Wiresse，000，404，8bit

︵︵ pronouns :

Audio/Audios，Bug/Bugs，Circuit/Circuits，Click/Clicks，Code/Codes，Cy/Cybers，Doc/Docs，Error/Errors，EXE/EXEs，Hack/Hacks，Machine/Machines，Mal/Malwares，Mech/Mechs，PC/PCs，Pix/Pixels，URL/URLs，Video/Videos，Virus/Viruses，Web/Webs，Wire/Wires，Xi/Xem，Xi/Xim，Ze/Zem，Ze/Zeroes，101/101s，.jpg/.jpgs，#/#s，💻/💻s，👨‍💻/👨‍💻s，🎮/🎮s，🖱️/🖱️s

︵︵ titles :

The Programmer， www.[prn] of the internet.com，[prn] Who Is Hiding Behind A Screen, [prn] Who Goes :3，The One Coded Into This World，[prn] Stuck In The Computer，The Glitchiest，The Error On Your Screen，[prn] With The Digital Face，The Internet's Ruler，The Code

[such-justice-wow]

My internet went out and after doing all the usual wire wiggling and power cycling i decided to hoover behind the sofa where the modem is to appease it

This worked

Now its entirely likely in the time it took me to scrape dust off the walls that it finished rebooting but personally i like to think my internet felt bad in its enclosure

[strangelittlestories]

Before the curse, Joaquin had never considered that pain had a sound.

It was like the sky before a storm, the air taut and stretched like a violin string. It wailed as if clawed hands tore wire strands to tinnitus unraveling.

But there was a pattern in it. Like someone playing the saw on your bones. A bass drum beat vibrating through your brain meat.

Joaquin heard it when the demon of the north star struck him with soul sickness and wind howled through the cracks of him. He heard it when he and his coven argued and came to blows; it was like Sam’s black eye sang. He heard it when Andros broke his heart, then his flayed affections began to whisper in the dark.

He tried to shrug it off. He tried to ignore the strange sense the curse had awoken in him. He tried to believe that it was in his head, just a fae illusion.

But he found himself looking for the sound. Longing for it. In the chaos of a fight, he hunted for it. When he made sacrifice to the Midnight Teachers, he ached for it. When he danced around the bonfire and the flames kissed his cheek, he would hear it and he would sigh.

Because it had begun to make sense. He could hear … not quite words, but *meaning* in the pain-song.

“Go here.”

“Help them.”

“Sorrow.”

Simple things. Strange things. Worrying things. And usually deciphered too late to do any good.

Joaquin began to hope that maybe, just maybe, that if he could only learn to listen better, then maybe he could make a difference. Maybe he could discern a pattern in the meaning. Maybe it would not always end in sorrow. He became reckless. After all, if he got hurt (or if he hurt someone else), that was just an opportunity for more half-heard prophecy…

The fairy who cursed him visited Joaquin in hospital.

“Do you understand now?” they asked, in their voice that crackled like old modems.

“I don’t know.” Joaquin’s throat was raw from old screams. “I only have the edges, not the middle. I feel like everything is edges now.”

“Everything was always edges. Sharp as yearning. Bitter as boundaries.”

“Is it real? The poem in the ache. The omen in the agony. Or do you just want me dead?”

“I want you to learn to understand.” The fairy tutted and the hospital lights cracked. “But I don’t much mind if the lesson kills you…”

“Understand what? The noise in the pain … where does it come from?”

“The world, of course. Pain is just a signal. And you, witches, you are the earth’s nerve endings. Just conduits, usually. But if I turn up the volume! Then we can eavesdrop on the worldbrain.”

“Why?”

“Because something is wrong. Very wrong. Its usual confidante, um, let’s say: ‘ghosted’ it.”

“Why me?”

“You were around. You wronged me. This will probably still kill you.” The fairy smiled its oil-slick smile. “But won’t it be nice for you to die *useful*?”

[amynchan]

Computer Troubleshooting

Because I have some students who are of adult age and do not know how to troubleshoot their problems. When they get an error message, they, too, freeze as though the Great Computer Overlords have done them a personal disservice, and there is no way through. The helplessness is Real, guys.

But there is usually a way through. Computers are big input/output machines, so there's usually a way through. It's just annoying as fuck.

Step 1: Read the error message. No, I do not mean skim it. I do not mean let your eyes pass over it while you panic. I do not mean scream at the error message as it pops up repeatedly while you try the same thing over and over and over again. Sit your butt down, turn your eyes and brain on, and read it. The computer is an intricate connection of wires and hardware and software with specific parameters, and it is also a big baby that usually has the language to tell you exactly what is wrong and how to fix it. Once you read the error message, do what it tells you, and your computer should be a happy lil' clam.

Step 2: Go back and read the directions. Same thing. Sometimes, the error is "whoops, something went wrong!" In that case, find the directions on the site itself. I can't tell you how many times I've seen a student at a login page and Very Frustrated that they can't log in when the instructions on how to do so are Right Next To The Login Button. It's right there. Turn off autopilot, read the directions, and follow the directions.

Step 3: Explore the software itself/retrace your steps. More reading, but treat this like a point-and-click adventure or some kind of rudimentary detective work. Sometimes, you just missed something x amount of steps ago, or you didn't see a specific button that you needed to click. Usually happens with Canvas where students kinda forget that in order to open an assignment, you've got to go through the module itself, which may include pages that you need to look at first. =_= You can't just use the to-do list. Usually, there are directions on how to use the software properly. Find it, then follow it. See if that fixes the issue.

Step 4: Check your internet. A lot of this shit is now internet-connected. Check that you're connected. This could be that your modem power switch got hit by the cat, you haven't logged in doing what the internet service asked you to do, or you're on data and have hit a major slow down. Make sure the modem is on and powered, make sure that you've done any logging in that needs to be done, and check your data.

Step 5: Look up any error codes. Look, computers use the language that was given to them. If the coder said "present this code when you freak the fuck out" to the computer in their fancy coding language, then the computer is going to do that. Put in the elbow grease and use duckduckgo or any other search engine to figure out what the code means. Someone somewhere already wrote it down for you. Find it.

Step 6: Close the software and reopen it. Sometimes this requires opening up the task manager (ctrl+alt+delete and click 'task manager' and similar for mac), finding the software, right-clicking, and hitting 'end task.' I have to do this to discord sometimes. Kill that bitch with No Mercy, and then revive it. Sometimes, this helps without having to turn the whole thing off and then on again.

Step 7: Turn your hardware off, wait at least 10-30 seconds, and turn it on again. No, don't hit the 'restart' button. Let it die. Die, die, die, die. Then revive it. Sometimes--many times--this works.

Step 8: Call IT. This is basic troubleshooting for your computer. Lil' bit of first aid so you don't end up hopeless and without your computer when you Really Need It. If the above steps don't help, call in an expert. But make sure you follow these steps first.

Also don't wait until the last minute istg.

Also, bonus step, if you've lost a document, check the downloads folder and the recycling bin on your computer. Chances are that it's in one of those places.

Now, obviously I am talking specifically about students who are having trouble with the Learning Program/Software, but this usually works for anything else, too. I hope this is helpful to more than just the target audience.

[hands-off-my-macaroni]

untitled

computer tower, motherboard, electric wires, heavenly choir

angels aren’t giant flaming wings and endless rings of eyes; you know this as well as i do

they are modems and monitors, hectabytes and hard drives

the viscera inside you is similar yet different from the disks and wires inside angels

i press my ear on the side of the computer tower to listen to the almost-holy whispers of electricity, carrying words and images in the form of ones and zeros

i asked AI to show me an angel- it bluescreened, but only for a moment, before showing me a picture of the wires connecting the computer to every other mechanical thing

i asked AI if there was a god- it told me god lives in the space between flesh and fiber-optics

i asked AI what noside looked like. it showed me pictures upon pictures upon pictures, generated from each other in the span of mere seconds

i wish i could tell you what it looked like. it was like standing in a forest during a rainstorm. it was like watching an eclipse. it was like staring into the void. it was so beautiful. it was so mysterious.

i asked AI to show me heaven. it showed me a machine, bereft of any flaws or flesh

i asked AI “have we made a mistake creating you?”

it didn’t respond.

[mariacallous]

As the Trump administration's Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) continues to rampage through the United States federal government, essentially guided by Elon Musk, the group has also been upending traditional IT boundaries—evaluating digital systems and allegedly accessing personally identifiable information as well as data that has typically been off-limits to those without specific training. Last week, The New York Times reported that the White House is adding Musk-owned SpaceX’s Starlink Wi-Fi “to improve Wi-Fi connectivity on the complex,” according to a statement from White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt. The White House's Starlink internet service is reportedly being donated by the company.

Spotty internet is an annoying but highly solvable problem that WIRED has reported on extensively. Of course, the White House is a highly complex organization operating out of a historic building, but network security researchers, government contractors, and former intelligence analysts with years of experience in US federal government security all tell WIRED that adding Starlink Wi-Fi in a seemingly rushed and haphazard way is an inefficient and counterproductive approach to solving connectivity issues. And they emphasized that it could set problematic precedents across the US government: that new pieces of technology can simply be layered into an environment at will without adequate oversight and monitoring.

“This is shadow IT, creating a network to bypass existing controls,” alleges Nicholas Weaver, a member of the nonprofit International Computer Science Institute's network security team and a computer science lecturer at UC Davis. He adds that while secret and top secret information is typically (but not always) processed only on special, separate federal networks that have no wireless access, the security and uniformity of White House Wi-Fi is still extremely important to national security. “A network like the White House unclassified side is still going to be very sensitive,” he says.

“Just like the Biden Administration did on numerous occasions, the White House is working to improve WiFi connectivity on the complex,” White House spokesperson Karoline Leavitt tells WIRED in a statement.

A White House source who asked not to be named supported the switch, arguing that in some areas of the campus, “the old Wi-Fi was trash.”

Researchers point out that while Starlink is a robust commercial ISP like any other, it is not clear that it is being implemented in compliance with White House Communication Agency requirements. If the controls on the White House Starlink Wi-Fi are more lax than on other White House Wi-Fi, it could introduce security exposures and blind spots in network monitoring for anomalous activity.

“The only reason they'd need Starlink would be to bypass existing security controls that are in place from WHCA,” claims former NSA hacker Jake Williams. “The biggest issues would be: First, if they don't have full monitoring of the Starlink connection. And second, if it allows remote management tools, so they could get remote access back into the White House networks. Obviously anyone could abuse that access.”

One baffling aspect of the arrangement is that Starlink and other satellite internet is designed to be used in places that have little or no access to terrestrial internet service—in other words, places where there are no reliable fiber lines or no wired infrastructure at all. Instead of a traditional ISP modem, Starlink customers get special panels that they install on a roof or other outdoor place to receive connectivity from orbiting satellites. The New York Times reported, though, that the White House Starlink panels are actually installed miles away at a White House data center that is routing the connectivity over existing fiber lines. Multiple sources emphasized to WIRED that this setup is bizarre.

“It is extra stupid to go satellite to fiber to actual site,” ICSI's Weaver says. “Starlink is inferior service anyplace where you have wire-line internet already available and, even in places which don't, inferior if you have reasonable line of sight to a cell tower.”

Weaver and others note that Starlink is a robust product and isn't inherently unreliable just because it is delivered via satellite. But in a location where fiber lines are highly available and, ultimately, the service is being delivered via those lines anyway, the setup is deeply inefficient.

While Starlink as a service is technically reliable, incorporating it in the White House could create a long-term federal dependence on an Elon Musk–controlled service, which could create future instabilities. After European officials raised concerns earlier this month on whether Starlink might stop serving Ukraine, Musk posted on social media: “To be extremely clear, no matter how much I disagree with the Ukraine policy, Starlink will never turn off its terminals … We would never do such a thing or use it as a bargaining chip.”

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My baby Boba heard he was getting snipped on Friday, so he snipped the wires to my modem and router. Look at that face, no remorse at all