#wow I haven't been here in a while

[hiimlove]

Chuuya: imagine working almost half your entire life and still being broke

Chuuya, sipping his flabbergastingly expensive wine: couldn't be me

Dazai, right beside him, drinking a cold, instant coffee:

[youmustbestrongernow]

(Hope this doesn't sound creepy lmao) but you got caught up in my mind the other day, I truly hope you're doing great :)

i mean i don’t think it sounds creepy, it’s always nice (albeit a little surprising) to hear someone is thinking of you, i’m ok, life certainly has been interesting of late, but in general i'm doing good and i think i'm on my way to great

[shadowduel]

all i wanna do is untie all your knots, dissolve all your thoughts

[presiding]

you'll never guess which level we're up to in this dishonored 2 rewrite

[averlym]

wow wow wow wow i came here to say it’s jane seymour’s deathday and saw that you have done so much improvement it’s crazy everything looks so lovely and amazing you’re doing great

~ holiday anon

quick portrait i did a while back. lovely reminder to see you again ily holiday anon

[orpheus-of-thrace]

doodles from months ago :)

[princewylder]

Finally graduated haha let's go 🥹

[l-tora-l-archived]

Hello (again :6) !!!

[darqrai]

♟️🐈‍⬛ is so perfect to me because they just. Get. each other. also they come into the relationship with kids who aren't their kids but one of them is basically their kid so they fall asleep watching bluey or blues clues a lot

[inejghavertz]

having a moment

[kitchensinksurrealism]

this happened like 6 months ago but I'm still thinking about it so like if someone sends you a song, saying along the lines of "it kind of reminds me of your music", and the song is nowhere near by yo la tengo, with lyrics like these:

and also we rarely send songs to each other over message (although we did used to talk about music/recommend songs when we knew each other irl (like 60% of our conversations were about music)), does that mean anything or am I reading too much into it...

[sallieraptor]

lol omg thank god finally a Vaggie yout0oz. it was about fucking time

[thatstruwu]

so while sitting in front of my laptop at 4am i suddenly remember about decision to leave as im listening to the ost which is phenomenal

which i'll make it about blackmadhi now unfortunately i will make everything about them. also this is more like a word dump bc exams have rotted my brain so my memories are more vague therefore some details may or may not be wrong crossing my fingers rn

also (again) this is not going in ANY directions at all i realize this halfway writing and i'm not fixing it

(skip through this part if you don't want to read about the movie for reasons - contains big ass spoilers)

the detail that enthralled me the most was seo-rae (the chinese female lead) and hae-joon (the male lead) sometimes converse through a translating app, which logically is unneeded as seo-rae is capable of using korean fluently on her own . the thing is, seo-rae chose to use them when she didn't want to communicate them by another language than her mother tongue as it was her rawest form of emotion (in addition to herself being a secretive person already). but again, if translating apps are that good then it doesn't even matter - it is bound to get things wrong. doesn't help that hae-joon himself is terrible with communication in general since he's basically obsessed with solving crimes and his work instead. so their “i love you”s are never “i love you” in words. throw the phone into the ocean, that's what he said to her. he got rid of all the evidence pointing towards her. she helped with his chronic insomnia. she cleaned the blood inside the pool because she knew he hated blood. but an ideal love story is not always a forever-and-ever one and this movie is one of them. hae-joon has a wife, he's a detective fighting for justice, he's in love with rules. seo-rae is a chinese immigrant who is a criminal, and basically... has nowhere to go left. fireworks are magnificent but you can't keep it blooming forever.

(end of spoilers)

so it made me think a bunch of things about blackmadhi in general. basically, if they somehow end up with each other and get their happy ending, going through 18 layers of hell might seem like an easier option. but personally i think it'll be really romantic. in their weird way but still one.

when i read some works i'm really interested in details where authors (shoutout to yall i love you) highlight their vast background differences that can't be changed. sure we all know that one is an ex-convict and one is a regent, but do you guys realize that

it's gonna suck for nahyuta since now he has to act in favour of his beloved home country instead of whatever he want

how likely is simon gonna be accepted as a partner (both legal wise and reputation wise)

eloping is out of the question

and that's only their first problem. i bet at this point if anyone even bothers to read all of this you guys are asking HOW IS THIS RELATED TO THE MOVIE i'm getting there i'm getting there.

one more thing to note is that they're from literally different cultures. simon is british/japanese (personally i go with british bc yk localization thingy) and nahyuta is east asian. there's this quote from the movie past lives (2023) that i really like:

you dream in a language that i can't understand. it's like there's this whole place inside of you where i can't go.

there are memories that you will never be able to fully insert yourself in, basically because it's not where you belong. the culture clash that makes you doubt if you truly belong anywhere at all. when you stay with your partner, one of you have to left their life behind - could be me, could be you. sure, flights are a thing nowadays, but flying means more like you're visiting for a vacation, not living there. you had spent your whole childhood there - it's a big difference.

your friends, your family, your traditions, your home now are halfway around the world. now you have to fit into their family, their traditions - how much of you can you retain? even between languages, you will never have a 1-to-1 exact translation. there are words don't exist in the other language. no matter how accurate and faithful, when you translate, it is obvious that it's not 100% truly what you mean at first anymore.

In Vietnamese, the word for missing someone and remembering them is the same: nhớ. Sometimes, when you ask me over the phone, Có nhớ mẹ không? I flinch, thinking you meant, Do you remember me?

I miss you more than I remember you.

(Ocean Vuong, On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous)

nonetheless, it's still him that you want. if you're willing to hold your hands through everything, you have basically won your bet.

you fall in love with that scowling, glaring prosecutor who's somehow an ex-convict and has a hawk with him. he only wears black and white attire. you could call him a wannabe samurai except that he's very, very, very serious about it - way more than a wannabe should be. he has curly, fluffy black hair with a visible white patch. he studies psychology but has a close connection with the (seemingly unrelated) cosmos space center. he loves his sisters dearly - the older is happily in jail and the unrelated younger is thriving as a defense attorney (who you called a spring chicken at first and he was extremely mad at it). he enjoys the noodles made by his drunkard friend whom you prosecuted once. sometimes, you wonder how lucky you are to be with him, but your little pretzel princess sister always stomps her feet and says that he should be the one feeling like that instead.

your first impression about him isn't the best - horrible, even. so much that you actually don't even like talking about it; you have never seen a living person with such a disastrous attitude. not to mention that he was actively hostile towards your long-time friends, which to you is utterly unacceptable. yet, when everything went down, you slowly realize that maybe you have found a similar deeply troubled soul. athena told you she felt deafening when she tried to hear his emotions. he's pretty, bitchy, preachy, insincere, he hisses and bites anyone trying to go near him. but then you finally got him smiling - which in first glance could feel like his usual fake ones - when he realizes he can trust someone like him. in your opinion, you think his palm tattoo is the most attractive thing about him; maybe even more than his jewel-like eyes. not like you would say it out loud - you're not sappy enough for those wordy expressions.

[fragmentedblade]

.

[lilianne-tarot]

PICK A CARD: Your favourite things about your future spouse ✮⋆˙

✧˚. How to Pick Your Pile: Take a deep breath, clear your mind, and look at the images above. Which one pulls you in the most? Trust your gut! Once you choose the image, The number below your chosen image is your pile. If more than one catches your eye, that just means there’s extra tea for you, go ahead and read both!

✧˚. If you enjoyed this reading, get your own personalized paid reading here!😊🦋

✧˚. For personalized 18+ readings, click here!

✧˚. My Ko-fi link: here 🫶🏻

✧˚. My Masterlist🫶🏻

𝜗𝜚˚⋆ PILE I

Cards Pulled: High Priestess, the Chariot, Judgment, Justice, Knight of Wands and oracle cards

Okay, honey, welcome to this pile 1!! Let’s see into what you’ll be lowkey obsessed with when it comes to your future spouse hehe. Before I start this reading, I just wanna mention something really crucial here, UHM......... y'all are LUCKY AF. 😭😭like TF. Also for people who chose this pile, the person described here is sooo similar to the character of Sang Yan from the C-drama The First Frost. I haven't even watched that drama yet, just saw it all over tiktok and insta reels and it's soo crazy how I was constantly thinking about him throughout writing this. The way he carries himself in that drama and SPECIFICALLY HIS EYES. THIS PILE IS LITERALLY HIM. PERIODT.

First off, this person? Mysterious AF.

Like you know when someone doesn’t post on social media but when they do, it’s in black-and-white with a cryptic caption and you’re like “HELLO? What does it mean??” Yeah, that’s their entire vibe. The High Priestess is the main character here, and this person is dripping in silent depth. It’s not that they’re quiet, NO NO, they’re intentional. Everything they do feels like a sacred ritual, even if it’s just tying their shoes. You’re gonna love how they somehow make you slow down and listen more, not just to them but to your own damn intuition. I’m getting this image of you two sitting on the floor, legs touching, and you’re rambling about your day while they just watch you like you’re a rare eclipse. And they’ll say something like “You feel like the ocean right before a storm,” and boom. You’re ruined. Forever.

And OMG don’t even get me started on the emotional depth… because wow.

Yeah, I got CHILLS. Literal chills. ? Bestie, your future spouse doesn’t just love you, they DROWN in you. There’s a softness to them that feels ancient. Like they’ve lived a thousand lives and chose you in every single one. Their love language? Definitely some spicy combination of telepathy, forehead kisses, and knowing your exact comfort food without you saying a word. And yet, they’re not soft in the doormat way. HELL NO. Baby, this person moves. When they decide they want something? Game over. They’re a force. You’ll love how they’ll be gentle with your soul but a literal wildfire for your protection. Someone stares at you weird? They’ve clocked it. You’re nervous to speak up in a group? They smoothly redirect the convo so you shine. It’s that ride-or-die loyalty with a spicy side of “Don’t mess with what’s mine.”

Your future spouse has transformed by the time they meet you. Like… phoenix out of the ashes levels of rebirth. I’m seeing someone who may have had to break out of their own cycles, maybe even some shadow work that slapped, but they did the work. That’s something you’ll absolutely adore about them: their self-awareness. You’ll be so drawn to how they hold themselves accountable. They’ve probably been the villain in someone else’s story, and instead of playing the victim, they faced it. Shadow work? Check. Therapy? Likely. Apologies? Given when needed. They’ve done a full spiritual exfoliation, and now? They’re GLOWING. AND they treat you with such intentional fairness. They don’t play games, they don’t breadcrumb, and they sure as hell don’t ghost (WHEW. thank god cuz i hate that shit) What you’ll cherish most is how they show up for you, consistently. Every little action feels like, “I see you. I honor you. I’m choosing you, even on the messy days.”

And um, can we please talk about how HOT they are when they’re PASSIONATE??? Because the Knight of Wands is coming in LOUD with main-character energy and It’s giving “I’m dragging you into the hallway to make out because I missed you for two hours.” FJNIDNSBTRVIH There’s a bit of chaos in their passion, but like… the fun, flirty, seductive kind. You’ll catch yourself staring when they’re focused on something they care about, eyes lit, words flying, and it’ll hit you: “Damn. That’s my person.” Like they could be talking about some weird niche topic, idk, the ethics of time travel or why a band’s debut album was superior, and you’re just sitting there like, “Okay, philosopher.” It’s hot. It’s brainy. It’s unhinged. And it’s so them. (did i just describe my type here?) 

But here’s the real one, your potential most favorite thing? It’s how they love you through your shadows.

It tells me that they don’t just love your highlights, babe. They’re the one who knows about the parts you try to hide, and loves them deeper. You’ll feel so safe being raw with them. Like crying-on-the-floor-at-2am kind of safe. They’ll be the person who doesn’t try to fix it, they’ll just sit with you in it. You’ll finally feel like, “Oh. I don’t have to perform here.” Also, minor side message that just smacked me: they might help you release a generational wound. Yep. It’s giving “breaking ancestral chains with one good relationship.” I’m not saying they’re your healer (you’re healing yourself, boo), but they are a safe space that lets the healing happen. And the ocean symbolism? BABY. Their love is like the tide, constant, natural, overwhelming in the best way. You might not even realize how deeply they’ve rooted into you until one day they’re not there for a few hours and you’re like, “Why does the air taste different???”

Okay, a few more spicy psychic messages which I got throughout the reading I'll drop here before we close because the tea is still hot:

You’ll love their hands. Like, obsessively. Spirit keeps showing me images of their hands wrapping around yours, brushing your hair back, gripping your waist, yeah, you’re gonna be down bad. They have a “hidden” creative side. Music? Poetry? Painting war miniatures? IDK 😭but it’s something they keep private until they trust you, and once you see it? Prepare to melt. 🫠 They’re a consent king/queen. In the bedroom, in arguments, in making plans, they’re always checking in. Always making sure your voice is heard. It’s HOT. You’ll laugh together in the weirdest moments. Like cracking up during a serious movie or turning a grocery run into a full-on comedy sketch. The emotional intimacy? Unreal.

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𝜗𝜚˚⋆ PILE II

Cards Pulled: Death, Ace of Cups, Four of Cups, Five of Pentacles, Knight of Cups and oracle cards

OKAY BESTIE… buckle the HELL up. This pile??? This pile is literally a love letter from the universe, and it’s about your future spouse in a way that’s got me gasping and screaming into the void. Like, if you’ve ever wondered what it would feel like to be truly chosen, truly adored, and truly transformed by love??? this is THAT reading. I’m already sweating more because the cards are kinds big ones as you can see😭 . This ain’t a crush. This is main character's energy meets divine rebirth through love . And your favourite thing about this person? Oh honey... it's EVERYTHING they awaken in you. But let me explain because DAMN it gets DEEP. 💀

this pile is all about how utterly devoted and obsessed he is with you, but in that controlled, sexy, lowkey psycho but make it romantic way. He doesn’t say much, but when he does?? It cuts straight to your soul. He makes you feel like the only person that’s ever existed. And when he touches you? The world fades.

Okay so first of all, this love is not soft-launch energy. Actually there’s no soft energy here. It’s not the kind of love where you post a blurry arm on IG stories and call it a day. No no. This is Death + Ace of Cups type of sh*t. This person literally drags you out of a fog you didn’t even know you were in. Like, imagine going through life feeling fine, maybe kinda meh, autopilot vibes, and then BOOM. You meet this person and suddenly, colors are brighter. Food tastes better. Music hits differently. You’re like, “Wait, am I ALIVE again??” Yeah. That.

You don’t just fall in love with them. You fall in love with yourself through their eyes. Because they see you in this way no one ever has before. They don’t pedestal you in some weird, unreachable way, but they mirror back your rawest essense. And you start to remember who TF you are. ✨ Like, you start off this journey feeling a lil rejected, a lil disillusioned (Four of Cups + Five of Pentacles energy… hello loneliness my old friend), but through this love?? You rise. You blossom. You reclaim your power. The crown was always yours, you just forgot. They don’t give you your power back, babe. They just remind you where you left it. And that?! That is your favorite thing about them: they activate the version of you that had been buried under years of rejection, doubt, and disconnection.

Bestie, I’m not gonna sugarcoat, this is NOT some sunshiney, fluffy past you’ve been through. You’ve known the ache of being left out in the cold. Maybe you’ve been the one always giving, always chasing, always hoping for scraps of love from people who didn’t even deserve to speak your name. You’ve had your heart cold-stoned and ghosted and breadcrumbed, and you were probably starting to believe that maybe love just wasn’t in the cards for you. Enter: this person.

They don’t just walk in with roses and pretty words (though they absolutely do that too, Knight of Cups energy is full-on poetic simp vibes 😭). But more importantly?? They SHOW UP. When you expect abandonment, they stay. When you push them away, they lean in. When you flinch at love, they don’t take it personally, they just hold you through it. You’re not their project. You’re their equal, their mirror, their muse. And you’ll find yourself sobbing randomly, “Wait… this is what it’s supposed to feel like??” Because for the first time, love isn’t a battlefield. It’s a sanctuary. It’s not conditional. It’s safe. I’m not kidding when I say this person is the Knight of Cups in every form. So with this person prepare to also see the perfect blend of this combination. prepare for random voice notes at midnight because they saw a cloud that looked like your side profile. Prepare for forehead kisses, poetic ramblings, playlists that sound like your soul. But also?? It’s not performative. It’s not just vibes and aesthetics. It’s intentional.

They speak your love language fluently, even the ones you didn’t know you had. You like thoughtful gifts? Boom, they kept the receipt from your first coffee date and made it into a bookmark for your favorite book. You like acts of service? Baby, they’re doing your laundry and ordering your comfort food on a day you can’t get out of bed. You like words of affirmation? They’re sending full monologues about how divine you are. Honestly, at some point you’re gonna be like, “Can you STOP being obsessed with me for five seconds?” But also you’ll be like, don’t stop. Ever. 😭

Let’s circle back to that Death card because whew… this is the CORE. Your favorite thing about this person isn’t just what they do, it’s who they are and who they inspire you to become. You literally go through a soul transformation in their presence. They don’t fall in love with your mask. They fall in love with your shadow. With the parts you thought made you unlovable. With your mess, your moods, your madness, and suddenly, those parts stop feeling like flaws and start feeling like facets of your magic. And in turn?? You’ll start holding them that way too. You won’t be idolizing each other. You’ll be liberating each other. This love isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being real. It’s about death and rebirth. It’s about watching each other burn and saying, “I still choose you.” They are going to be your favorite revolution.

"Wear your power proudly and unapologetically" is not just advice, it’s what your future spouse pulls out of you. You’ve spent so long shrinking. So long waiting for permission. And this person? They’re gonna hand you the crown and go, “You were born royalty. Act like it.” And the best part? They don’t do it for clout. They don’t flaunt you like a trophy. They cherish you like you’re made of stardust and war paint. Your softest parts are sacred to them. Your weirdness? Worshipped. Your power? Encouraged. Like babe... you will feel both feral and safe in their arms. Do you know how rare that is????

Okay this is so random but it came through SO clearly, I’m getting this image of you hating Mondays your whole life, until this person shows up and suddenly?? You’re excited for the week. You’re looking forward to slow morning texts, coffee runs together, messy buns and “just 5 more minutes” cuddles before they leave for work. They re-sensitize you to the beauty of everyday things. And that is so underrated. They make your life feel like poetry again.

 Final random Favorite Things You’ll Obsess Over:

The way they say your name like it’s a prayer. Youll love listening to your name from them. Their ability to sense your moods before you speak. That would be their superpower, honestly. And also the contrast of their softness in private vs their strength in public.

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𝜗𝜚˚⋆ PILE III

Cards pulled: Six of Swords, The Empress, The Fool, Five of Wands, Ace of Swords amd oracle cards

OMG This pile? This is the rom-com-meets-healing-arc-meets-delulu-dream-guy-you-manifested-during-a-Lana-Del-Rey-retrograde kinda situation (don’t ask me how i came up with this😭). This is raw. This is “you didn't know you were starving ‘til he fed you” energy. Wow that was deep LOL.He LOVES the full spectrum of you. Your sensitivity, your rage, your need to cry during commercials, he eats it up. Encourages you to take up space. He celebrates your chaos. And the banter?? UNMATCHED.

So first off, let me just say this: I legit felt like I was watching one of those dramatic K-drama slow burns when I tapped into this spread. Like ep 1 is you emotionally limping out of some messy chapter of your life, and ep 16 is you soft-smiling while they brush hair from your face and say, “You’re safe now.” I’m crying just thinking about it 😭 but I digress—

Now let’s start peeling back the layers of this absolutely BONKERS beautiful energy: your fave things about this person? Oh honey. It’s not just their looks (although, side note, the way they carry themselves? That quiet “I know who tf I am” swag? Oof. HOT). But no, what melts you? What gets you twisted in the sheets and emotionally raw in the car at 2AM? It’s their consistency, their emotional maturity, and the fact that they’re lowkey your safe space after a lifetime of chaos. Yeah, I said it. The trauma you didn’t even realize you were still carrying? They help you walk that ish to the river and let it go. Six of Swords style.

And listen. This person doesn’t swoop in and fix you, don’t get it wrong. They don’t love you despite your wounds, they love you with them. Like “hand-in-hand with your demons” type love. They don’t run when things get messy. They lean in. You’ll sit there anxious and they’ll hand you a blanket and be like, “Keep talking, I’m not going anywhere.” THAT kind of presence? Yeah, bestie. That’s what you’re gonna worship. But don’t think this is some therapist in a man’s body situation either lmao. There’s a whole wild side to this person too, like, this person challenges you. HARD. Five of Wands energy was screaming at me like “YUP WE FIGHT BUT MAKE IT FOREPLAY.” 😂 They’re gonna debate you for fun, tease you just to make you roll your eyes, push your buttons not to be toxic, but because it turns them on to see you all passionate and fired up. The intellectual banter is chef’s kiss. Your fave thing about them? You never get bored. They don’t just nod along, they’re present. They got opinions, they got a backbone, and they’re not afraid to go toe to toe with you when you are acting up (and honestly? You love it).

This pile is all about liberation. Your fave thing about him is how he reminds you of who you are before the world made you smaller. He gives you permission to laugh too loud, cry too much, and dream too big. And he’s gonna do it all right beside you.

Now The way they see you… like, you're not just a person to them. You're a literal universe. The way they look at you when you’re ranting about something random? Or doing your skincare? Or just existing in oversized pajamas and a bonnet? They’re gone. Fully GONE. And because of that? You start to see yourself differently too which is honestly the best part. Like, your favorite thing about this person is how they love you into softness, into full self-worth. They speak to the parts of you that felt unworthy and whisper, “More. You deserve more.” You start walking different because of how deeply they hold space for you.

 Baby😩 This person is your reset button. The Fool here isn’t naive, it’s liberated. You’ve been carrying so much emotional weight from past relationships, maybe even from family crap, old fears, toxic exes, and here comes this person like… “Why are you still dimming your light?” this is literally them encouraging you to live a little, say yes more. Take the leap. Splurge. Cry. Yell. Make a mess. Be too much. They LOVE that you're extra. They don't flinch when you're chaotic. They jump off the cliff with you, giggling. (that one was a little exaggerated but nvm😭)

Like, your favorite thing about them is how much they let you take up space. Not just tolerate it. They encourage it. “You are worth every desire, every dream. Demand what is yours.” And this person? They believe in that. They fight for that. Ace of Swords slicing through the bs like “You’re not going back to that old version of you.” And I’m telling you right now, they’ll probably be the one who drags you to that dream vacation you were too shy to plan, or who makes you apply for the job you think you're not good enough for. They see your power. They know your value. And it becomes your favorite mirror. 💅

And YESSSS, there’s a sexuality to this pile too. Bestie. Don’t lie. I know you saw The Empress + The Fool and went 😏. SAME. This person? They worship your body like it’s art. Like a damn temple. And it’s not just hot passionate nights, it's playful, explorative, curious, FUN. That “I can’t keep my hands off you but I also wanna laugh in your neck while doing it” kinda vibe. 😭That alone could’ve been the whole reading LMAO. But here's the secret sauce: the emotional intimacy hits harder than the physical. It's the way they look at you when you’re vulnerable. When you’re quiet. When you’re in your dark. The Ace of Swords says this person cuts through the noise, you don’t need to over-explain yourself. They just get you. Like intuitively. You’ll be like “I didn’t even say anything” and they’re already making you soup or running you a bath or telling you to block that toxic friend. HOW DO THEY KNOW??? Idk, babes. Soul contract things. 💀

OH and one more image i saw, there's this moment I saw like clear as day: you're going through a rough patch emotionally. You're bawling, maybe imposter syndrome, maybe an old wound opened up, idk, but this person? They stop everything and hold your face and say something brutally honest but loving like: “You forget who you are. Let me remind you.” And it floors you. Floors. You. 🥹

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Thank you so much for reading all the way through! I hope my reading resonated with you and that you had a lovely time going through it. If you enjoyed it, please like and reblog, it really means a lot! Let me know which pile you chose; I absolutely love hearing your thoughts and feedback on my readings! If my reading resonated you, you may consider buying my paid reading as it would really help me out financially♡

Note: tarot cards provide guidance and possible insights into what could happen based on current energies, thoughts, and actions. the cards can highlight potential paths or outcomes, but they do not fixedly predict the future. this is a general reading so take what resonates!

[thepitlanepress]

WE'RE FAMILY, ME AND YOU –

↳ oscar piastri + gf!reader

⌗ :: masterlist

⌗ :: a/n: osc being protectiveeee . also he is so fine in that pic. warnings for offhanded comments abt weight and shit like that (if anyone irl is like this towards you i'll personally fight them). idk if this is gonna be super good bc i think my brain stopped working near the end lol but other wise enjoyyy

"please don't hold my horrible family against me, oscar," you say when he pulls into the driveway of your childhood home, the warm lights blaring inside.

"baby, we've been dating for two years, and i've met your family before," oscar smiles picking you hand up and gently squeezing it.

"i know but seriously, they're going to be awful," you groan softly falling back in your seat. "i don't want to do this."

"we'll do it together okay?"

"okay."

the first comment came a few moments after you walked inside: "oh its so good to see you oscar!" your mother and grandmother both come rushing out to greet you.

"and my darling daughter," your mother smiles and gives you a small hug, before pulling back and eyeing you up and down. "you chose quite the dress wow, you can see everything. you'd would almost think it was too small."

you laugh along with the "joke" and only relax slightly when you feel oscar's hand slip into your own, reminding you he's there.

you continue on through the house as your grandma gives oscar a tour, even though he was here about two months ago and literally nothing has changed.

he's polite, and nods along with whatever nonsense spiel she's giving him about a vase that apparently was her great great grandmothers - when you know for a fact she bought it a week ago because she sent your sister an incessant amount of texts about it in the family group chat.

the one you're clearly not apart of.

when you make it to the lounge room, you instantly sit down on the couch pulling oscar down with you, wanting this night to be finished with already. your grandmother enters the room with a platter of snacks, smiling as she puts it down, "now don't eat too much of this sweetie or you won't have room for dinner, or anymore room in that dress."

you don't notice is but oscars demeanour changes then.

he pulls you closer to his side and has one arm tightly wrapped around your waist as he takes a few crackers slipping every second one to you. he leans down whispers in your ear. "eat, i know you haven't today, fuck what linda says."

you smile and slightly relax more into the conversation, especially when your grandad and dad enter the room. both are overjoyed you're here, instantly stealing your boyfriends focus and talking to him about racing and the latest car that your dad bought and wants to fix up.

you were having a slightly better time, well until:

"pumpkin, leave poor oscar alone, you're practically on top of him!" you mother fusses, and you internally flinch at that dumb nickname.

"i wouldn't mind if she were on top of me," oscar mutters and you choke slapping him on the chest as he smirks. it brings a smile to your face the first one of today.

your dad clearly having heard what was said becomes all red and flustered clearing his throat and announcing dinner is ready, while struggling to hide a smile.

–––

dinner is your least favorite moment of the night. from the comments, to the "mothers" purposely pushing plates away from you. oscar notices and instead puts food on his plate and then switches it with yours.

which leads to them tsk-ing about how he needs to eat more and let you choose what you eat.

and you do what any good daughter would do when your mother looks at you and nudges the salad in front of your plate and says, "make sure you eat your salad, pumpkin," you shove it down and paste a smile on your face.

oscar sees it.

"how is work lately, oscar?" your grandmother asks smiling at him, before nudging him in the side with her elbow, "you're doing better than, pumpkin over there i tell you."

shove it down.

oscars hand lands softly on your thigh, silent support in the only way he can right now. you smile softly at him and he winks at you a small smile appearing across his face.

"oh enough you, we don't need all this while eating dinner, well while we eat dinner, you don't really need to," your mother sniffs. you struggle to push this one down and excuse yourself from the table. "i'm sorry oscar, that she wasn't letting you breathe. she needs to learn to give you some space. so clingy that girl."

"i'm breathing perfectly fine," oscar answers entering the conversation his voice calm but strong. "and quite frankly mindy, i think you need to lay off with the comments, i'm fine, your daughters fine, we're all fine, so stop with the snarky comments and the petty bitchy notions. because quite frankly, thats how you're acting, like a bitch."

he shoots a look to your grandmother, "and you too linda, don't go around pretending you're all high and mighty with your "everyone is amazing and i love my family" act, when you can't even treat your own granddaughter right. you two should be ashamed of yourselves. do better. all of you- well except you darren and mike i like you guys."

with that he pushes his chair out and goes to find you, knocking on the bathroom door, but not hearing a response. "sweetheart? you in there?" after a few more moments of silence he enters the room - you're not in there obviously, the window is open and he can hear the car running outside.

he leaves the house without saying goodbye to anyone and just gets in the car with you puts it in reverse and leaves.

you're both quiet for a few moments before you whisper, "i'm sorry for running out."

"no," oscars voice is firm. "don't you ever apologise for that, those women are bitches in a snake skin and they do not deserve your time and attention." he pulls off on the side of the road, cars driving past the only sound that fills the space in the quiet. "don't you ever apologise for being a beautiful, perfect person. don't you ever apologise for being you. because you are perfect."

he takes your face gently in his hands and softly kisses your nose. "you are the most amazing human being ever and i'm glad my heart belongs to you, those pathetic women back there can't see your beauty or your talented-ness or your smarts - you're a race engineer for gods sake - and thats on them." he presses a kiss to both of your cheeks.

"you are my sweetheart, my gorgeous best friend, my everything. and i love you baby," he whispers kindly before pressing a soft kiss to your mouth. "we're a family me and you, we don't need those fuckers back there," he winks.

you giggle and whisper back, "i love you too."

a quiet moment falls over top of you both as you just rest your foreheads pressed against each other.

"takeout?"

"let's go."

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