#y/n steals lan zhan to be her dad and gets wei ying in process

[self-indulgent-imagination]

A Little Rabbit Steals Lan Zhan

warning: implication of child abuse, fluff, wei wuxian (bc let's be honest, he is his own warning)

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Wei Wuxian stared at her. Her big eyes, just like Wei Ying, lips jutted in a pout just like Wei Ying, her lack of words, just like Lan Zhan. She was more like Wei Ying than Lan Zhan, really. Or maybe she was a bit of both. Probably that was why Lan Zhan had picked up this little waif of a girl from streets. And so, Wei Ying stared at her.

The girl stared back at him. And Wei Ying would've almost believed her mein of defiance if he hadn't been her some thirty-odd years ago. He knew those haunted eyes. He knew those straightened shoulders which hid the quivering hands, the shivering heart. He knew that pout which hid real hurt under pretence. It had been his childhood after all.

"Aiya, did my Lan Zhan bring me another little radish?", Wei Ying asked, kneeling in front of her.

"Mn," Lan Zhan replied, just as the little radish said, "Not a radish."

"Ah, not a radish? Then what is this, Lan Zhan? A small rabbit?"

The rabbit in question giggled at this and nodded. "Ahh, so this is a Xiao Tuzi!! Well, what is this little rabbit called?"

"Y/N," she replied.

"Wei Ying, this is our daughter, Y/N," Lan Zhan spoke suddenly.

Wei Ying looked up slowly, his eyes wide, mouth half-open. "Lan Er-Gege, since when did you go around stealing kids?"

"Zhan-ge didn't steal me, I stole him," the little rabbit declared confidently.

"Xiao Tuzi, your Zhan-ge is already married. You shouldn't steal other people's husbands."

"But I didn't steal a husband, I stole a Baba who wouldn't hit me," these words uttered in complete earnestness were what brought the legendary Yiling Patriarch to his metaphorical knees.

"Aiya, but now you'll get two babas."

"Y/N likes Ying-baba. And Y/N wants an older brother, so she will also take Sizhui-ge. Now you all belong to me."

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a/n: yes. that's it. that's all i have. a little rabbit stealing lan zhan.