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simon-x-billy · 2 years ago

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Simon x Billy

Year of the OTP: February

Chapter 2: The European plug situation

February prompt: Different

AN: Simon x Billy is a slow-burn m/m fic using the first-time-bi trope; turns NSFW (male/male, consensual) beginning tamely at Chapter 7 (July).

Meet my OTP: Simon Lewis, author of a best-selling paranormal book series, who keeps writing himself into his novels; and Billy Delaney, Irish handsome devil and nomadic man of mystery, who chefs internationally; and Italy. It’s sort of like a threesome. Simon x Billy is a slow-burn m/m fic using the first-time-bi trope. TW: References to the pain of being cheated on, bad language, bad humor, puns, Irish-isms, making fun of Americans, massive rewrites.

Read it all: All: on ao3 || Start: January Ch.1 || Next: March Ch.3

Chapter 2: The European plug situation

———/Simon/———

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. This is not going the way I planned. I hate it when that happens. I was prepared.

Except for the European plug situation.

First off, my bad. My responsibility, my fault, my dead phone. On day 1, in another country that speaks a language I don’t parlo. Except when I’m having an internal scolding session. Apparently, io parlo Italiano just fine when I least need it. Like when I’m conducting a conversation behind my face. Behind my fucking face. (Whose lip I can feel curling to express distaste and low key angst.)

Ugh. They have to have cell phone chargers at the gift shop. I sigh. Looking around, it’s pretty obvious that this was originally some kind of old, schmancy vacation villa. Something tells me there’s no gift shop. It’s not that kind of hotel. Under my breath I whimper, “Fuck.”

“All right?” It’s Billy. I jump because why is he standing behind me?

I pivot and fix him with my very best suspicious glare. I went to theatre school. Ok, fine, summer camp. Point is, I give good face when needed. This is one of those times, one of those faces. “Jesus! How long have you been standing there, creeper? Were you listening in on my conversation?”

“You mean, the word ‘fuck?’ That was a pretty quiet, short conversation.” He’s grinning at me now.

“Did you go to theatre school?” I clarify, “Like, ever?”

Billy snorts. “No, man. Where’d that come from?”

He’s all good humor and it’s so totally inappropriate, I try willing him to stop. His eyebrow — oh my god it’s humongous wtf — one arches while the other frowns. How does he do that? At least the top half of his face isn’t grinning anymore. That’s progress.

“What?” he demands. “Why’re yeh lookin at me like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like you’d like me to feck right off, leaving you alone to realize you’ve not got your room key.” He jangles it at me.

“That would have been the topper to a very shitty day.” Having stopped rolling (not molly - the other kind of rolling), my eyes pop out of my head. Because he has handed me the keys. “Whoa,” I say reverently. “These are sooo cool.”

I have to keep myself from fondling them. “Skeleton keys,” I whisper.

“Glad they cheered you up, man. You were havin a mope there for a while.”

My mope returns. Sort of an exasperation + anxiety x annoyance, to the power of a lingering ache in my stomach that I know from recent experience is a bone deep sadness.

“And now it’s back,” he says. “Whatever’s goin through your head can be moped over later. Mate, you’re in Italy. Yeh haven’t seemed to notice that yet.”

“Is there a gift shop?”

“Sorry, what?” he asks. Is he laughing at me?

“A gift shop.”

“This isn’t that kind of hotel, mate, sorry. Is there something I can help yeh with?”

So many things. “I just remembered the plugs are different here. I have arrived in Italy with a dead phone and no compatible plugs. I feel so betrayed.”

He laughs and his eyes twinkle. They twinkle.

At least he can tell when I’m joking. That’s a thing.

“Don’t worry, Seemon. I’ll get it sorted.” He gives a small salute and disappears into the bowels of the hotel.

Oh shit. “Wait! Billy! Billy?”

A woman appears in his place from some dimly lit doorway. She reminds me of my mother. But with fewer anxiety and worry wrinkles criss-crossing her face.

Damn. Ma would be so wounded by that thought, so I put it out of my mind.

“Signore?”

“Oh, um, si, io non parlo Italiano. I like to start all my sentences that way,” I say with an attempt at charm. Billy doesn’t get to own charming.

She gives me a strange look, and responds with the old classic “Okaaaay,” in heavily accented English. “Why do you stand in the doorway? With the baggage around you like goats.”

Apparently neither one of us is very funny in English. I feel so lost in translation.

“Come. Let me make you checked in, and we will settle you. Come in from the doorstep,” she says as she turns away with her neck craning. “Leo? Leo!”

A young man (boy?) — A young man-boy hurries out of what appears to be an office. She’s peppering him with instructions that I can’t understand. My suitcases are being pulled right out of my hands. Rude! (But helpful. I guess.) Don’t try that in New York.

While she futzes with her computer, I finally take a moment to notice the amazing carved wood segment of wall behind her. I wish I could see it in detail. Figure out what story it’s trying to tell. It has something to do with nudity. I try squinting, but that’s all I can tell from here.

A bright, clashing array of intricately painted tiles are framed throughout the room. Chaotic, yes. Neutral, no. We’ll go with chaotic good. It’s also delightful, which I’m so not in the mood for at the moment.

She tells me about the amenities, breakfast times, the famous restaurant, blah blah blah as she leads me up three flights of stairs, and down a long, narrow hallway with many doors — none of which are mine. I’m starting to lose my bearings, but it’s only one more flight of stairs, atop which she pauses to unlock a door. “It is good, Signore Laywees? You have the face of a dog who is whining.”

“Wow,” I say, taken aback. Taken-aback has now officially been added to my repertoire of faces. Officially.

“Did I say something in a way that is wrong?” she asks, with a worried look.

“I don’t know. You might have actually wanted to call me a whining dog.” I start to chuckle.

“Yes. Exactly. A whining dog. I remember for next time.”

I blink.

She nods, “Si certo. Certo. And I tell you that what is here is the finest suite at Hotel di Limoni is here.” She ushers me on to the top floor. “You look around, you. See that there are no other doors here to this floor. You are here alone.”

“Yes. Yes, I am,” I nod, thank her, “Grazie,” and close the door behind her.

———/-/———

My mood disappears instantly.

Oh my god I’m in Italy.

The room before me has pale yellow walls the color of butter imported from Irish cows. That’s specific and descriptive, Lewis, nice one. (I try to encourage the writer within, whenever I can.)

Source Right: Hotel La Tonnarella. I stayed there, but not in that room. I wasn’t trying to get in that much debt.

Everything is in shades of sea and sky blues, bright lemon yellow, and pale Irish butter, with more of the chaotic good tiles here and there working their delightful magic. The bed cover is also in pale Irish butter. I will sleep in pale Irish butter tonight. Oh yes, I will.

The overall effect is an airy room, full of light, that recedes into the background against one hell of a view.

Large french doors lining the exterior wall lead out to a massive deck. One that I and I alone can access. The doors have been thrown open, with sheer curtains rippling into the room. The breeze off the Mediterranean Sea is fresh and cool.

Oh my god. That’s the Mediterranean Sea!

Or Tyrrhenian. Whatever.

I watch as boats speed across my entire view, appearing and disappearing between the open doors. They leave their long white slashes behind them, literally left in their wake. From inside the room, they look like dashes, stuttering white lines in each window darting through the perfection of the blue Medi/Tyrrhenian Sea.

Waking up to this is going to be amazing. She would have loved it.

“Fuck her. She can’t have it.” It’s mine, and mine alone.

———/-/———

I acknowledge that I need to stop. Stop with the moping. Fuck Billy for trying to be friendly and helpful, the bastard. That charming Irishman is right and I temporarily hate him for it. But only hyperbolically.

I walk out onto my balcony and into the bright sun. I immediately decide that this is worthy of a sunburn, and shuck off my shirt.

Oof. I’ve just realized that my eyes are watering because that distinctive odor is coming from me.

One would think a shower after a sunbath would be the rational, intelligent option. Nah. Intelligence has fewer hit points than stacking a 24 hour odyssey of jet lag, rumpled hair, eau de pit, and a bad attitude. I’m winning today.

“Chin up, Simon. Chin up.” That was Ma’s pearl of wisdom for this trip. The sum total of her empathy. She didn’t even like What’ser Name. So where’s the sympathy? The empathy? Apparently empathy dims in direct proportion to the glamorousness of one’s vacation destination.

Maybe I can wash the mope off. And the headache. And the me.

Grabbing my stuff, I head for the bathroom and stop dead.

“Dove il bano!” I cry. ‘Bathroom.’ Feh! What an absolutely disgraceful excuse of a word to describe something as magnificent as this. Look at it. So majestic, while also being mindfully calming. Everything everywhere is blue, and I can’t tell the inside from the outside.

Turning on a shower should not be this difficult. I am a grown man, goddammit. I should be able to figure out how to turn on a freakin shower. I mean, I figured out what the extra toilet was for. Correction: Not a toilet but a bidet. Though I admit to having called the front desk about it. What can I say, Italians like to have fresh butts.

“You will not defeat me, vile mechanism of demonkind, I will not be deterred, oh no! I will have my shower, and dammit, it will be good.”

———/-/———

I am happy to report to you, oh devoted fictitious audience in my head, that it was good. It was the best shower of my life. Or at least one of the top five, as I may have better showers even than this magnificent one at some point in the future. At least I doubt I will ever smell so good again. It’s the bath stuff made from a “beneficial” mineral spring somewhere around here. I want to smell like this every day for the rest of my life.

But first. The sun.

I feel unencumbered, unrestrained. So I skip the swim trunks and just wear my towel onto my massive deck. Deck. Not dick. Deck. I do want to let it all hang out there, but then, I also want to disappear into this experience, and the specter of horrified travelers covering the eyes of their crying children is enough to reinforce my modesty. I don’t want my dick ruining anyone’s vacation, so I keep the towel on.

———/-/———

I’m drooling as I wake up on my side with my ass half hanging out. It’s not a good look.

Turns out I couldn’t care less. Four uninterrupted hours of sun, in the peace and quiet of the apocalyptic visions usually filling my head these days. Whenever I think about the book I owe my editor — Noooo! Duck! Run! Hide! — See? I can’t. I won’t. You can’t make me.

And yet I have already double-crossed myself because I’m thinking about it anyway. Yesterday I was still slogging away at Book Four’s first chapter, and hating every single word I wrote. It was a whole pile of nothing. Less than nothing. It was tripe. So I gave up and rashly trashed it, deleting the offending text while I waited to board my flight.

All of it. It’s gone. And that’s a good thing, because every turn of phrase I had managed to wrest from my uninspired noggin just failed like a lead weight. Total fail. I’m used to having a tiny, yet enthusiastic filmmaker living inside my creativity. He’s really good at pulling forth the sweeping torrent of imagery I see like a movie in my head when I’m on a roll. (Again, not that kind of rolling.) But now? I can only manage six or so paragraphs at a time, and hatefully hate every one of them. “Whyyyyyyyy?” I ask the sky.

So here’s what I know: Half my characters will eventually be about to die unless Simon saves them. With the help of super-vamp Raphael and maybe a nymph or two. Looking up, I can see the islands they call the Syranusas, after the sirens who so callously call sailors to their deaths. So now I’m thinking maybe I’ll pull in some expendable mermaids, too. I dunno.

It all just sounds so played out. At least to my eyes. Like, I’m writing another war, with all the same characters, having the same powers, and using them all the same way, to rescue the same loved ones + world from evil the same way. Except I’ve stuck them all on the Mediterranean and added a bunch of mermaids. What’s next? Introduce zombies into the series as if they actually exist — for the first time in book four? Holy hell, writer’s block sucks. God.

This is supposed to be the book that finally focuses on Simon as the main character. The fans just will not shut up about wanting one. I groan. And not in a sexy way. I mean, I know I should be flattered that they like the whole twisty ‘he’s me’ thing, but how do I write a whole book about a character I based on me? Isn’t that kind of self-serving? Cringe?

I am such a dick. Only I would write myself into a book.

My eye-rolls are practically deafening at the mere thought of it. A whole book about me who is not me. And I have only me to blame. (Other me.)

———/-/———

Read More: All on ao3 || Start: January Ch.1 || Next: March Ch.3

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calehenituseappreciation · 4 years ago

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Tommy thinking Sam Nook and Sam are two different people would lead to such funny senarios.

Especially if you apply this logic to everyone.

what if mexican dream and quackity are the same people and that was just him making fun of dream and making tommy laugh and tommy genuinely thinks dream killed mexican dream and that hes a different person

and when ranboo pretended to be killed by clarencio

he just doesnt realise

he thinks girl dream is someone else too

tubbo genuinely has a bunch of personalities and so he thinks theyre all different people (and also he doesnt realise theyre the same people a lot)

sam, in his normal voice: tommy do you have the- tommy, crying: what happened to sam nook?

sam proceeds to live as sam nook around tommy because he once tried to tell tommy sam nook isnt real and he started sobbing and so sam cant

sapnap, approaching sam on the site: hey sam can you do this for me? sam: su- tommy, running up: SAAAAAAM!? sam, in the sam nook voice: hello tommy! sapnap: wtf??? tommy: this is sam nook! :D have you met him? sapnap: what? thats just s- sam: shakes his head, behind tommy where he cant see sapnap: uhhhhh sam: takes out sword sapnap: h-hi sam nook! tommy: :D

sam is not the only person this happened to.

tommy: technoblade???? techno, sneaking into l'manberg: uhhh techno, in a highpitched voice: no this is Clarencio tommy: the llama? techno, in high pitched voice: no the pig tommy: hmmm techno: sweats tommy: smiles brightly ok!!!! techno, under his breath: that worked??? tommy: wanna hang out with me? techno, in high piteched voice: i really need to go tommy: buttttttt :(

technoblade proceeds to have to pretend to be clarencio the pig and hang out with tommy all afternoon

phil, coming to check on techno: techno? techno, in a frilly pink dress, in a high pitched voice: hi tommy: phil!!!! have you met clarencio??? but not the llama!!! clarencio the pig!!! phil, holding back a laugh: is that so?

(defenitly happened before he got exiled, i refuse to change my mind)

everytime techno is caught he says hes clarencio (the pig) and tommy vouches for him each time and no one is able to bring themselves to tell him that clarencio (the pig) doesnt exist

sam nook, :handshake: clarencio the pic, :handshake: mexican dream, (not girl dream) not being able to tell tommy their not real bc hed cry

IMAGINE IF TOMMY WAS GIVEN THE JOB OF LIKE BEING THE BORDER PEOPLE WHILE HE WAS WILBURS VICE BEFORE THE ELECTION AND PEOPLE WOULD JUST FAKE IDENTIES AND TOMMY WOULD JUST BELIVE EVERYONE

quackity: i demand to be allowed to join l'manberg! wilbur: ur american quackity: i shpould still be allowed! wilbur: just say your not, thats what everyone does quackity: what wilbur: just make a fake identity?? quackity: youre... the president???? wilbur: yeah and?? quackity: shouldnt you not be be endorsing that??? wilbur: i made tommy the border person. you think i care? quackity: sksksks quackity: still bad tho

the only one tommy never believes is dream, no matter what, he can just tell when someone is dream, like ya know those police dogs? the only reason he didnt realise girl dream was because girl dream is girl dream he thought it was just a dream thing

TOMMY THINKS BAD AND MONOCHROME BAD ARE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE

monochrome bad: tommy tommy: whomst? bad: oh uh recolourfies tommy, screaming: WHAT THE FUCK

tommy doesnt have object permanence but for people

techno, while tommy is staying with him: leaves room tommy, crying: I had a big brother once, i dont remember him tho

phil leaves them and (while stabbing wilbur) tommy just doesnt realize its him until techno says "dad?"

quackity works at wendys and tommy goes there everyday but doesnt realise its quackity

tommy went there since the war ended

and at the time didnt realise tommy cant tell and so when he and tommy started a mafia and became friends he thought tommy knew who he was and tommy once suggested going to dennys and quackity is like 'oh my god' and tommy is like my friend works there!!! and then they go to the one quackity works at and quackity is like 'haha funny' and then tommy asks around and then turns to quackity sadly like "my friend isnt here today D:" and then quackity is like o h

tommy, towards sam, in sams house: sam!!!!!! sam, who was sleeping, in his normal voice: w-what? tommy: sam!!! :D sam: hey tommy yawns whyd you wake me up? tommy: sorry but i really needed to ask you a question!!! sam: did you want to ask me where sam nook is again? tommy: welll.. that too but!!! you should meet sam nook!!!! sam: what tommy: please please please sam: no go back what did you ask? tommy: you need to meet sam nook! i think you'd be friends!!! :D sam, internally: shit sam: uhhh i dont really think i should- tommy: pleaasee uses puppy eyes sam: sure sam, internally: why did i say yes????

sam then has to pretend to be sam and sam nook at the same time

tommy: you're gonna love sam nook sam!!!! sam: uhuh tommy: where is he? :( sam: uh maybe hes behind you tommy: turns around to look sam: runs to other side of tommy sam, in sam nook voice: hello tommy!!! tommy: sam nook! have you met sam??? hes right here!!! gestures to sam who has to run behind him again tommy: sam say hi!!! sam, panting, in normal voice: hi tommy: whyre you all out of breath and shit???

this,,, just continues for a while

quackity, watching this exchange, driunking juice: sucks to suck sam: you'd do the same quackity: no. mexican dream is dead lol tommy, only hearing the last part: cries i miss mexican dream quackity, feeling sad: uh- we can revive him maybe? tommy: wipes tears YEAH! sam, whispers to quackity: told you so quackity, hisses to sam : shut up

quackity then has to pretend to revive himself while running around also he has to steal another one of dreams masks

honestly in this au everyone would hear about what happened during exile and stab dream (while pretending to be other people because ig in this au tommy still thinks dream was once his friend and yeh)

tommy, after crying infront of sam nook and telling him what dream did to him: so.. sniffs do you have any more quests for me to do? sam nook: i have one more quest tommy, cheering up: what is it!! sam nook: for myself tommy, confused: what is it? sam nook, taking out a glock: homocide

insanebur: you want to know why no one listens to you tommy? tommy, pouting, on the verge of tears: What? insanebur, unable to finish, clutching his heart: your too cute

this is just au where tommy is baby huh

wilbur isnt mad schlatt exiled him- hes mad he exiled tommy

schlatt and dream are the only ones not affected by tommys baby vibes and thats their downfall

tommy just has to call everyone a nickname, once, and everyone is melted

niki and jack: tommy is the fault of all our probelms we should kill him puffy: he. bonk is bonk baby bonk niki and jack: look over at tommy tommy, with sam in the distance: cries to sam because he cant find sam nook niki and jack: okay... maybe we should be less... violent...

Sam rlly just went

sam: looks at tommyinnit sam: nothing bad will ever happen to this child ever again

huh?

I’ve named this au, au where hes baby ur honour

tommy: i had zero parents (who care) tommy, gestures to puffy and sam: NOW I HAVE TWOOOOOOO

insanebur: god i fucking hate everyone tommy: even me? insanebur: except you tommy

sam: I AM THE TOMMY GAURDIAN! GAURDIAN OF THE TOMMY! sam @ anyone who wants to hurt him: FUCK OFFF

tommy canoanically understands the animal crossing language

ranboo: i can speak enderman! tommy: well i can speak creeper

whenever tommy gets overwhelemed around sam he burys himself he asks sam to cover for him in creeper

okay thats enough of that

#dream smp #tommyinnit #awesamdude #mexican dream #captain puffy #sam and puffy are the only ones who get parental rights #hes baby your honour

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argumentl · 4 years ago

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The Freedom of Expression Ep 43 - Man who was living in attic above the supermarket ceiling arrested.

K: Hi, this is Dir en grey's Kaoru with this week's episode of The Freedom of Expression. Joe san, Tasai san, welcome. Ok, lets get straight on with it. Tasai san...

T: Yep.

K: Could you..?

T: Well, we have some unexpected news from America this time. Some attic news.

Y, K: Attic news?

T: A man who who living above the ceiling of a supermarket without permission has been arrested. A man named Matthew Hammer had been found to be living above the ceiling of a branch of the chain store 'Raley's' for one week. He was stealing food from the supermarket and eating it. So as to the background to his arrest, a night-shift staff member saw a leg poking out through the ceiling, and obviously thought, oh my god, there's someone there. They reported it straight away and the police arrived with the police dog. They sent the dog up to chase the man out, but the dog also lost its footing and it got stuck.

J: It sounds like a joke!

T: Yeh, its like a manga or something. So, in order to rescue the dog, a rescue team from the fire station was dipatched. After rescuing the dog, they arrested the man. What do you think of this sudden news?

J: Well, its really American...its hard not to laugh.

T: Its a crazy idea, right?

J: It is, you would never think someone would live up there.

K: But if you think about it...he could've continued living up there forever.

J: Yeh, yeh he could, he'd have ample food. Um, its kinda like that Korean movie that was released a while ago, Parasite. Living in a rich person's house without permission, and getting up to things while the owner was out. In reality this guy is sneaking into the supermarket, living there and helping himself to food.

T: Yeah, and apparently he'd also made a kinda simple-style living room above the ceiling.

J: Did he?

T: He'd put whatever he liked up there..a sofa, a tv...

K: Oh, the supermarkets over there sell all sorts of stuff, don't they?

J: Yeh, they do.

T: Yeah.

J: In America, well..in Nevada, its pretty big right? Thier supermarkets are also big. They are a lot bigger than Japanese supermarkets. So, from that perspective, I bet the attic space is pretty big. He would have had a lot of space to live in. But still, it seems like people might try to copy this idea. Im kinda interested in this leg sticking through the ceiling part.

K: Yeah, like why was his leg sticking through the ceiling?

J: Maybe he didn't realise it was poking through.

T: Its pretty shocking though right? If you suddenly see a leg poking through the ceiling.

J: Yeh, you'd think, 'What is that?!'. Well, at least you could say its good that no-one died.

K: It was dangerous for the police dog too, wasn't it?

J: Yes, it was.

T: It really was.

J: It was dangerous for the dog too.

T: Hm, the police dog. But why ???*1.

J: I wonder what this guy was eating though?

K: It says he was eating ready made deli food.

J: Oh, deli food?

T: What kind of thing is American deli food?

K: They do have it.

T: What is it like? Do they have stuff like deep fried pickled mackerel?

K: Ah, no, they don't have that kind of thing. They have like fried chicken, or salad, or meatballs etc.

J: He must not have had any kitchenware up there, right?

K: Well, he probably didnt need it. But they will have had it in there.

J:Hm, yeah. He probably didn't need to cook. He will have had all-you-can-eat potato chips.

T: Yeah.

J: Well, they recently had the presidential election in America..so from that perspective, well, the gap between rich and poor in America is a big problem. So for people who can't eat, they have to figure out a way to keep themselves going.

T: Yeah, but why did he start living there? He could have gone in and got what he wanted, then left.

J: It was probably the easy option. Rather than sneaking in and out. He figured he could live pretty well there. It seems like the security weren't checking as far as the ceiling each time.

T: It looks like he didn't ever want to go outside.

K: He might have gone outside sometimes though.

T: Oh, ok.

J: A bit like a guest .

K: But he didn't steal any money from the cash registers, did he?

J: Right.

T: Yeah.

J: When you think about that, it seems quite a reasonable thing.. haha

T: Yeh, like living together with the supermarket, haha

J: Im not sure whats worse in regards to shoplifting...he wasn't stuffing his pockets and making a run for it, he was just taking what he needs to eat upstairs.

T: He was probably watching who was shopping downstairs.

K: Ah, yeh.

J: Additionally, he was coming down at night to get deli stuff, so it will have been the unsold stuff. If you think about it like that its quite eco-friendly.

T: He's a good guy.

J: Haha, a good guy.

T: Matthew Hammer, age 35. He's a good guy.

J: He is. Rather than stealing the cash register money, he eats the leftover food.

T: I think Kami might have something to say about this story.

J: Yeh, so do I. Hello, are you there?

Kami: Yes, Kami speaking.

K: Haha, 'Yes, Kami speaking'? What is he saying? haha

Kami: Aren't the ceilings in American supermarkets pretty high up?

K: They seem high, don't they?

J: I think so, yeh.

Kami: So in that case, its a good job both the police dog and the criminal didn't fall.

J: Certainly, if he'd have reacted badly there could have been a big accident.

T: Yeh.

Kami: Thats right. Its good that the dog was helped with its task, but it didn't complete its mission at all, so it will end up having to be retrained.

J, K: Ahh.

T: But you'd never imagine a police dog having to walk above the ceiling. haha.

K: Yeah. It wouldn't know where was safe to walk.

Kami: I feel sorry for the police dog.

J: But you think the dog didn't complete its mission, so..

Kami: It will be made to retrain. Don't you feel sorry for it?

J: Well, yes, of course.

T: Hehehe

J: This is the kind face of Kami showing.

T: He is kind sometimes.

Kami: Because I'm a compassionate god.

J: Haha, you're calling yourself a compassionate god?

T: He is kind sometimes.

J: Kami, what do you think about the offender, Matthew Hammer? Whats your judgement of him?

Kami: Its difficult, but, hmm..what can I say? haha.

J: Haha, he laughed. 'What can I say?'

Kami: Well, he's innocent, right?

J: Innocent?

Kami: Innocent.

T: Incidentally, Matthew Hammer has been charged with robbery, and obstruction of police. If he's found guilty he will get at least one year in jail, and at most ten years.

Kami: What did he do to obstruct police?

T: Probably by refusing to get down from the attic or something.

J: Ah, he might have been violent, yeh.

Kami: Well, he's guilty then.

J, T: Hahaha

T: Kami's decision power is pretty weak.

J: His opinions are too casual! 'Well, he's guilty then!' haha. What do you mean by that, Kami?

Kami: Well, a crime is a crime.

J: So Kami also thinks he's guilty.

Kami: He is guilty.

T: Yes, unfortunately, he's guilty.

T: By the way, what type of deli stuff do you guys like? Joe, Kaoru?

K: Deli? *To Joe* Do you eat supermarket deli stuff?

J: I absolutely do.

K: Me too.

J: What do you like?

K: I like..those Korean veggie mixes.

J: Ahh

T: Yeh, like Korean carrots and bean sprouts, or green veggies.

J: As for me, Im trying to be careful with food, but usually the leftover, discounted stuff is fried food, isn't it? My local supermarket puts the half price stickers on at 9:30. So, i get there for 9:30, but so does everyone else. Im on the offense and defense. As soon as a sticker goes onto any non-fried item, everyone is straight in there! There is so much energy.

K: Haha

J: Everyone is there slightly in advance, and just waiting.

T: You too, Joe?

J: Yes, me too.

T: Thats the type of thing that appeals to young women.

J: Ojikyun?

T: Yeh.

J: This?

T: Probably, haha.

J: Thats it! haha.

T: Everyone, try to imagine Joe waiting like that in the supermarket.

J: Its pathetic! At 52 years old, waiting for the half price off stickers in the supermarket! But, still, you have to wait, right? Kaoru, don't you try to get those? The half price off items?

K: I've never tried to.

J: But if you saw it was half price off you would buy it though, wouldn't you?

K: Yeh, if it was the same thing as what I wanted.

J: Right? Absolutely.

K: What about you, Tasai?

T: I like that pickled mackerel. Stuff like that.

Sorry for mentioning that again.

J: Thats all you've said today.

K: He's hinting that to us.

T: I love the stuff.

J: Do you?

K: Ok, shall we finish? Please subscribe, thank you very much.

*1 Couldn't catch.

#dir en grey #the freedom of expression #tfoe #kaoru #薫

24 notes · View notes

harryssunflowerkiwi · 4 years ago

Text

‘KIWI’ Part 2.

Pairing: Harry Styles x female reader.

Synopsis: You see Harry again. he’s still smitten and you’re horny.

Word count: 8.1K

Warnings: swearing, drinking, drugs (cocaine; mentioned in some detail), and SMUT (unprotected! Wrap it up pls), and slight pain kink. 18+

A/N: Hello! I hope you’re doing good :) here’s part two!!! Yay!! Thank you to those who liked part one. I truly am having so much fun writing this. Sorry it took me 80000 years to post this, I took a break! But it’s here and I’m so happy. Also, this is my first time writing smut! So please be nice but let me know what you think. Again, please keep in mind that this is PURE FICTION and is in no way an accurate dipiction of Harry Styles! It’s just for entertainment purposes. Also! For the purpose of the story, please pretend kiwi was not part of HS1 and instead part of his third (unwritten) album :) With that being said, i hope you love this part as much as I do xoxo

PLEASE REBLOG IF YOU LIKE IT :)

🥝 Outfits mentioned in this part 🥝

Words underlined are links !

PART 1

——————————————————————————

September 12th 2020~

It’s nine days since Harry had met you, nine long days. For him the days since have been filled with long studio hours and sleepless nights. Every night he’d come home and wonder when he’d get the chance to meet you again, he’d think about what you were doing and if you were thinking about him as much as he’d been thinking about you. Surely you hadn’t, he thought. If you had been interested you would have given him your phone number, like all the other girls had jumped at the chance to do. He tried to stay humble, but he wasn’t oblivious to the effect he had on women. It was obvious, atleast it always had been before. They all threw themselves at him, but you didn’t. You didn’t even give him a proper excuse to why he couldn’t have your number. You showed him very little interest and yet, here he was completely infatuated after one simple meeting. Sure, meeting you gave him enough inspiration to write songs which was initially the reason he went to that party. But it only left him wanting to do whatever he could to get the chance to see you again.

The days since the party have been rather stress filled for you on the other hand. With London fashion week coming up in less than a week you had so much work to do. You had a fashion show on the seventeenth to prepare for and dozens of custom outfits for various celebrities to finalize. It was both exhausting and exhilarating. You had thought about Harry, he’d pop up in your head whenever a song of his would play in the office or in the coffee shop you went to almost everyday. You felt the spark when you two had met, of course you did. He was incredibly attractive, charming, and kind but you didn’t have time to be dating a celebrity of his stature. You have a buisness to run and the last thing you need a bunch of insanely nosey fans bullying you along with the heartbreak of the inevitable break up.

Harry was sitting in the studio with Mitch, Sarah, and Charlotte recording. The three of his band mates were in the booth recording their respective parts of a song Harry had written a few months back called “30,000 miles” while Harry was sat on one of the black leather couches just outside the booth attempting to write. Although he’s been able to write a lot about you, he’s only gotten one song even remotely close to being finished. Most of what’s he’s writin since meeting you has come out more like journal entries about how your eyes made him quiver and how when you hugged him he felt like your touch was exactly what he’d been missing thus far. It all sounded like a horny fourteen year old, Harry thought. He needed to see you again for his feelings to repourpose themselves into more coherent emotions. Harry had been wracking his brain on how to make that happen since the two of you met, and the only thing he could think of was to ask Jeff. The only problem with that, however, was that Jeff would more than likely tell you and make Harry look desperate. And even though he was bordering on desperate, he certainly didn’t want you to know that.

Harry was lost in thought (about you of course) when Mitch came out of the booth and sat in the dark blue velvet armchair directly across from Harry. “Still having trouble dude?” He asked sympathetically bringing Harry out of his little trance. Harry sighed and moved his gaze away from the small leather bound notebook he was writing in to focus on his friend.

“S’ just hard man. S’neva been this hard before.” Harry said as he closed the book.

Mitch nodded and mumbled “it’s probably because you’ve never been single while tryna write”. Harry put his palms over his face and let out deep chuckle.

“Fuck, you’ve go’ a good point” he agreed as he sat lower into the couch.

“Are you interested in anyone at all right now? I mean I don’t think I’ve seen ya single for this long in forever” Mitch pointed out as he reached for his water bottle from beside the sound board. Harry sighed deeply, ran his right hand through his curls and gave Mitch a little pout.

“Who is she dude?” Mitch asks with after letting out a loud laugh at his friend being overly dramatic.

“Y’ remember y/n? The designer fo’ KIWI?” Harry responds, leaning forward and rests his left palm under his chin.

“Fuckin hell H. Wasn’t that night the first time you met her?” Mitch says with a grin, obviously teasing Harry.

“I know, I know. S’fuckin ridiculous but I can’ stop thinking about her” Harry replied as he slouched himself back into the couch shoved his black raybans off the top of his head so they were sitting on his nose, covering his embassment.

September 13th 2020~

Today is Sunday, which means it’s Harry’s day off. He didn’t really know what to do with the day but he was still extremely happy to have time to relax and try (and fail) to not worry about everything. He woke up at ten this morning, actually allowing himself to sleep in to make up for the various all nighters he had been pulling throughout the last week. He dreamt of you but not in the way he’d want, not one of those erotic sex dreams where he could make all his needs come true. No. In his dream you were with someone else, and he kept trying to talk to you but you couldn’t hear him or you were simply ignoring him. Either way it didn’t feel good but for some ungodly reason he’d still woken up with a raging boner. “Fuckin ‘ell even the thought of her wit’ someone else gets me off” he grumbled with a groan in frustration as he rolled out of bed.

As Harry was making himself breakfast, chopping yellow grape tomatoes on the large oak cutting board that sat on the marble counter next to the stove, he heard his phone ring. He looked around to try and spot where the ringing was coming from as he’d forgotten where he’d put it. He spotted it on the island behind him and to his left. He sprinted over to it and quickly answered with his left hand, wiping the tomato juice off the fingers on his right hand off on his blue sweatpants. “Harry here” he said realizing he hadn’t checked to see who it was before answering.

“Harry! I’ve got great news for you mate” Mitch’s deep American accent rang through the phone.

“Wha’ is the good news Mitch?” Harry asked as he sat at one of the light blue quilted stools that sat at the island, suddenly feeling slightly anxious.

“I’ve just found out KIWI is doing a show for London fashion week, it’s this Thursday” Harry could practically hear the grin on Mitch’s face through his voice. A fashion show? How could he get an invite four days before the show? Would he even get the chance to see her if he did? Won’t she be busy? Won’t she think he’s weird for going? Harry’s mind was filled with questions he knew Mitch wouldn’t have the answers to.

“Dude?” Mitch’s voice snapped Harry out of his panicked thoughts.

“Gotta go man, thanks for telling me” Harry mumbled before hanging up quickly.

After a few hours of debating with himself and trying tirelessly to forget about the idea all together, Harry found himself sat at his dining table with his phone open to Jeff’s contact. He stared down at the phone resting against the mahogany wood dining table trying to convince himself this was a bad idea. However, his efforts were in vain in the end. He glanced at the time in the right hand corner and it showed 12:41AM. He pressed the call button so quickly he himself even doubted if he’d done it at all, but evidently the calling screen came up and he brought it to his ear. Letting out a huge sigh at the forth ring, figering Jeff wouldn’t even pick up at this time of night. “Hello?” Harry almost dropped the phone when he’d heard Jeff’s voice on the other end.

“Um h-hello, Jeff s’ Harry” he stuttered slightly, still not really believing he was going through with this.

“Yeah H, I know. What’s up?” Jeff chuckled loudly.

“Oh umm so you uh know y/n right?” Harry asked trying not to seem to eager.

Again, Jeff laughed a bit before saying “you like her don’t you?”. Harry groaned internally at his friends ability to gudge his feelings based on his voice alone.

“Doesn’ matter, was jus’ callin’ to see if you could get meh a seat at the KIWI show on Thursday” Harry said as more of a statement rather than a question, feeling his confidence peak its head again.

“H, that’s in four days” Jeff responded without hesitation.

“Yeh I know, I jus’ ave’ to be there alrigh’?” Harry asked as politely as he could without making it obvious he was trying desperately to avoid any further questioning.

“Alright, I’ll see what I can do”.

September 14th 2020~

Today was incredibly busy for you. There were only three days till your show and you still had so much to do to make sure it would be perfect. You were currently at the office that you rent out for KIWI. The space is nice, modern and open with a slightly acclectic feel to match your taste. There were 3 separated offices, the smallest was for your assistant Grace, another for the head of public relations for the company who’s name is Gretchen, and the largest one at the end of the hall was yours. You decorated nicely, but kept it minimal as to not cause to many distractions. You only came in when there was issues you couldn’t deal with from home or when you just felt like getting out of the house to work. You liked to keep your company small, only hiring people who you really trust for jobs you couldn’t handle yourself. Even though KIWI is incredibly successful, you were generally able to manage it with little help.

At 7:13AM you arrived, greeting Grace and heading straight to your private office telling her to follow you. Once sat in your large brown leather chair Grace started giving you the rundown of who’s called, what there is to do, shipments, etc. “Jeff Azoff called early this morning, he left a voicemail asking for your availability. I told him to call back at 11 just before you go out for lunch as that is your earliest availability today” she relayed as she stood nervously (she was pretty much always nervous, even though she’d been working for you for over two years).

“Okay, did he mention what it was about?” You asked wondering what he could possibly need that he wouldn’t just call your cell.

“No, but he did say it’s urgent” Grace responded with a small nod.

At a quarter to eleven your desk phone rang, you picked up at the first ring already sitting right next to it typing out an email on your laptop. “Mr. Azoff on line 2” Grace said on the other side.

“Great, thanks Grace” you responded before hanging up and switching to line two. “Hey Jeff” you said as you closed your laptop.

“Hi! How’s it going y/n, haven’t talked since the party” he asked seeming quite cheery.

“I’m good Jeff, why are you calling through KIWI? Why not just call my cell?” You questioned rather confused.

“Ah because you told me not to call your cell for matters concerning KIWI-” he said as if it was obvious.

“Right, but you you’ve only ever called regarding KIWI to get pieces for one of your clients and you usually go through Gretchen” you cut him off, still extremely confused.

He chuckled before saying “Well If you’d stop cutting me off I’d tell you why I’m calling. I need a front row seat for your show on Thursday”. Well, that was certainly not what you thought he’d say. He’s never asked for a seat at one of your shows, let alone a front row three days before it happens.

“What? Are you insane? It’s in three days. Why on earth would you need a front row seat?” You asked, now even more confused.

“It’s not for me, it’s for Harry. C’mon I know you can bump someone back a bit, it’ll be good publicity having him there” Jeff said calmly. You had to do a bit of a double take when he mentioned Harry’s name, why would Jeff need him to be there this last minute? He had surely already been invited to the Gucci show on the same day. You sighed

“I don’t know, the people I put in front row deserve to be there. Any of them would take it as an insult to be put in second row”. You heard hum quietly on the other side of the phone

“y/n if you put Harry upfront it’ll be good for KIWI, you know I’m right” he continued. You let out a frustrated huff, you knew he was right. The paps would have a field day with him missing the Gucci show to come to yours, but you already had so much to deal with.

“Was this your idea or his?” You asked, genuinely curious. “He asked me to, but I think it’s an incredible idea for both of you” he said confidently.

“Fine, call Grace to set up the details. I’ll have an outfit sent to Harry by Wednesday morning just email me his measurements. He can’t be showing up to my show in Gucci” you replied sternly, giving in.

Harry was at the studio when Jeff called him. He was going over some adjustments for ‘30,000 miles’ with Kid Harpoon when his phone rang. “Jeff! Any news?” He said hopefully after picking up as soon as he was Jeff’s contact.

Jeff chuckled at the boys eagerness “Mhm you’re lucky I’m so good at convincing people, you’ve got a front row seat at the KIWI fashion show this Thursday” he said proudly.

Harry stood out of the leather rolling chair instantly and yelled “Wooooo!” Slightly starting Kid and causing Jeff to laugh through the phone.

“I’m glad I could get it for ya H. They are sending over an outfit for you to wear and I’ll have a car at your place on Thursday at 6PM sharp to pick you up.” Harry smiled widely, taking in the information as he sat back down.

“Thank ya’ Jeff, y’ the best manager eva’”

September 17th 2020~

Today is the big day. Of course it’s not your first runway show but the nerves never lessen, every time it gets more intense and nerve-racking. The cloths you design are your heart and soul, your blood sweat and tears, your everything. This makes showing them off to critics and the entire world terrifying but exciting. Not to mention you’ve decided to walk as the last model for the finale, which makes the whole thing even scarier as you’ve never really walked a runway as a model.

For some reason the knowledge that Harry was going to be front row made you all the more anxious and you hated it. No man has ever made you nervous at your own damn fashion show, it’s rediculous. “I don’t even like him” you said aloud to yourself as you were in the car on the way to the venue. Luckily by now your driver knows well enough to keep his mouth shut when you talk to yourself.

Once you arrived at the venue it was half past two. You always show up hours before the show to help set up, get all the outfits in place for the respective models and make sure everything is absolutely perfect. You’d spent months designing the way you wanted the show to look, clothing aside. The catwalk is all white, ensuring that all the colors included in the collection pop as they were meant to, especially once photographed. Above the runway are large fixtures that are meant to look like clouds, giving the whole collection an airy out-of-this-world feel. Which is exactly what you had planned when designing it.

Backstage was hectic and stressful, as it always was. The models all arrived at three, giving everyone enough time to get hair and makeup done in time for the show. The makeup and hair you had chosen for this collection was simple, yet bold. Nothing to extreme to not take away from the clothes.

Harry was incredibly excited for the show, more excited than he had been for a fashion show since the first one he attended. He was there to see you, but he was also elated to get to see the collection. He’s never been disappointed by the pieces you’d designed. Even before his newfound crush on you. You were exceedingly talented and fantastic at what you do, he’s known that since long before he met you. The suit you’d sent for him was breathtaking to say the least. He absolutely adored it. It was a black suit, with gold lining and silver flower embroidery all along the jacket. It made him feel like a billion dollars.

Harry arrived just before the show started, not to seem to eager in case you came to survey the venue before it started. He found the seat with his name on it and grinned widely as he sat. His seat was right at the end of the runway where the models would turn before walking back. It was the ideal spot really, and it gave him butterflies thinking that you gave him the best spot. The venue was nothing like he’d ever seen before and he was sure you had something to do with that also, because it was breathtaking.

Time went by like a blink of the eye for you, what seemed like twenty minutes turned out to be an hour. You were ushered to the hair and makeup chair to prepare for the finale. For some reason all your nerves had dissipated, completely vanished into thin air as you sat and listened to the makeup artist compliment you on how incredible everything looked.

After forty minutes in the hair and makeup chair you were being dressed. You had chosen one of the only gowns in the collection for the finale, wanting to go out on a memorable note (even though you considered every piece in the collection to be memorable). The gown was a floor length fully hand embroidered black and gold gown. Each embroidery was done by you. It had long sleeves with the same detailing and it was sinched perfectly around your waist with a large solid gold plate. The gown was the piece that inspired the whole collection, taking almost six months to make. You were very proud of it and you felt incredibly sexy.

As your stylists were putting you in your black pumps, one of the coordinators came over and said “miss y/l/n is on in five”. You took a deep breath, attempting to mentally prepare yourself. You followed the coordinator towards the entrance to the catwalk. You felt eerily calm, you knew you should be freaking out but you weren’t. You felt incredible.

“3..2...1.. here comes y/n for the finale”

Harry was thoroughly enjoying the show, each item was completely perfect. Everything was cohesive but wildly different, anyone with working eyes could tell how much thought and attention to detail was put into everything. Even the styling was uniquely perfect, each model wore the pieces like they were made for them. Not a single thing looked out of place, everything belonged in a rabelious harmony and Harry was completely enveloped in it. The music stopped playing as the last model walked out, Harry looked around as another song started playing. Assuming this was the finale, Harry sat up straighter and grinned. Excited to see whatever you had planned. As the beat dropped in the song, all the models came walking out in two lines. One on the right and one on the left. Once the two front models came to the end of the catwalk they all stopped and slowly bowed their heads. Harry’s heart was beating so fast he thought he might actually have a heart attack. Then all of a sudden you walked around the corner and stepped onto the runway and Harry’s heart stopped completely. You were walking towards him like you had walked a million runways. You looked so powerful and sexy. The gown you wore was nothing short of breathtaking, a fine piece of art and the way it fit your body made all the blood rush towards his crotch.

As you reached the end of the catwalk you looked directly at Harry, who was sitting right night to the main camera. You gave him a quick knowing smirk, obviously seeing the pure shock on his face as you turned around and started walking back towards the entrance. God, you felt fucking incredible. Each model followed you one by one off the runway before the music stopped.

September 23rd 2020~

The last three days went by relatively fast for you. The show went exactly how you wanted it to and it was nothing short of perfection. All the press had been incredible and the critics were being positive which wasn’t always a given. There’s been a lot of buzz about the gown you wore, in fact, there’s word of the national art museum of London wanting to showcase it which is unbelievable. All your success has been skyrocketed, even from what it was at before. Having Harry at the show helped with the media buzz, they always went crazy when he was around but it did start rumours of the two of you dating. Especially after the pictures from the show were released and it was very obvious he was staring at you in such a way. You didn’t really care though, all publicity was good publicity.

It was Wednesday today, and you decided to work from home this week because you were still pretty exhausted from all the work you’d done in preparation for the show. Your day had been relitively slow, answering emails and drawing out some new designs for spring. You were sitting at your desk drawing out a coat design when your phone started ringing, you glanced at it and saw Glenne’s name pop up. You smiled lightly and picked up up.

“Hello?” You greeted her.

“Hey y/n! How are you?” She asked cheerily.

“I’m great G, just finishing some work. How are you?” You asked as you sat back in your chair.

“Great! So the reason I’m calling is because Jeff and I wanted to throw a party for you to celebrate the show. Obviously we need you here for that” she giggled, obviously excited.

“Aw of course I’ll come. What day is it?” You asked.

“It’s Friday night! It’ll be at the Hilton hotel, just give them your name. We’d like everyone to be there at nine if possible” she responded.

“Okay! I’ll be there at seven babe” you said as you stood up to look in your fridge, suddenly feeling hungry.

“Harry will be there” Glenne said knowingly, slightly drawing out the end of his name. You laughed as you shoved a slice of cheese into your mouth.

“And?” You asked.

She giggled again, “he’s been asking about you a lot lately, and we all saw him at your show. You two are obviously fucking” she said in a mocking tone.

“G! We are not. He’s just obsessed with me” you chuckled, rummaging through your fridge for more snacks.

“Oh stop, who isn’t? Plus you guys would be adorable together!” She responded loudly through the phone.

“G, he’s the relationship type and I’m so far from that, you know this” you said sternly.

“Y/N you don’t even know him, how do you know he’s the relationship type?” She asked giggling at your tendency to assume you know people immediately upon meeting them.

“I’ve heard his music, G. Anyways, I’ve got to go make something to eat before my stomach eats itself. I’ll see you Friday”.

September 25th 2020~

As soon as Jeff told Harry about the party they were throwing for you he was ecstatic, knowing he’d get a chance to actually speak to you. Since it was a celebration of you and KIWI, Harry decided to wear some of the pieces he owned that you designed. It took him about 30 minutes to decided on which of your designs he wanted to wear, hoping you would appreciate the gesture. Jeff had already assured Harry that he wouldn’t be the only one wearing KIWI at the party when he brought up the idea to him, which made Harry feel more comfortable. Eventually he decided to wear a two piece set you’d designed last season. It was Harry’s favourite. It was a long sleeve button up shirt and long perfectly fitted trousers, both made out of a beautiful sparkly blue fabric with a light contrast stitching.

Upon arriving at the hotel Harry noticed that there were many cars parked out front and all down the street, way more than there had been at the last get together. He assumed it was because you would have invited more of your circle this time, as they were celebrating you. Harry made it up to the penthouse where the lady at the front desk had told him to go, and was greeted at the door by Jeff, quickly giving him a hug and ushering him into the large room. “Sorry I’m a little late, had some issues with m’ car” Harry apologized to Jeff with a small smile, both of them fully aware that he was indeed late because he takes so long to get ready.

“S’all good man, it’s just getting started” Jeff chuckled lowly as Harry followed him through the foyer and into the large open living room, where it seemed most of the party goers were. It was a pretty busy, around 80 people from what Harry could see. Through the crowd his eyes landed directly on you. You were talking to a small group of people, some of who Harry recognized. You were sitting on one of the big couches on the right side of the open space, you were slowly nodding while sipping from a glass of dark brown liquid. You were wearing a gold sparkly jumpsuit that hugged every inch of your torso in the most flattering way possible and flared at the from the knee down. Half of your wavy hair was effortlessly pinned back with a brown claw clip. You looked so beautiful, you stood out in the crowd of other beautiful people. Your energy and vibrancy completely overpowering the room.

As soon as Harry entered the living room with Jeff your attention was taken away from the group of friends around you. You immediately noticed that Harry was wearing one of your personal favourite designs, and you could tell he had spotted you aswell. As if he was looking for you, he smiled widely as you made eye contact. “Excuse me guys, I’m going to grab another drink” you smiled at the group before standing up and walking across the living room diagonally towards the open concept kitchen to the left of the living room. You purposefully glanced at Harry as you walked passed him with a cute innocent smile.

As soon as you entered the kitchen and bar area you felt someone behind you, you turned on your heel being met with Harry a few feet behind you. “Ello love” he greeted you with his deep English accent, “congratulations on the show, ‘t was incredible” he complimented with a genuine smile on his soft pink lips. You smiled back and slowly looked him up and down, observing his body in your design.

“Thank you, Harry. I’m glad you liked it. Lovely choice by the way” you said as you motioned towards his outfit with your hand.

“T’was hard too choose which one to wear if I’m ‘onest” he replied with a low chuckle as he stepped towards you a bit.

“You made the right choice, it’s one of my favourite designs I’ve done” you complimented as you leaned against the large marble counter, placing your almost empty drink on it “fits your body perfectly” you continued as you met your gaze with his again.

“It does doesn’t it?” He asked cheekily as he pulled at the top a bit with his ring clad hands. “Y’ look incredible, love the jumpsuit” he flattered as he moved about a foot closer, leaving only a few inches between the two of you.

You smirked “so charming” you replied as you gently touched his cheek while holding strong eye contact. You could feel his heart beating against your arm. You stared at each other for a few more seconds, almost as if you were having a conversation solely through eye contact.

“You need a drink” you smiled as you let your hand fall from his face and you spinned around as you made your way over to the bar.

Harry was completely stunned as he watched you walk over to the large bar, quickly grabbing all the ingredients for whatever drink you had decided he should drink. Being so close to you only moments before made his mind blur and his heart race. How could you just walk away when it seemed as if you were about to kiss him? Most people would jump at the chance. But he assumes most people would also jump at the chance to kiss you, he certainly would. He was taken out of his thoughts by your sweet voice. “Harry” you called for him from the bar, his name sounding like heaven coming out of your mouth like that.

“What’d ya make me love?” He asked as he walked over to you. You held out a glass filled with dark brown liquid and a single large ice cube in it.

“A Manhattan, it’s my favourite” you blinked sweetly at him, the sides of your mouth tugging up at the sides as he grabbed it mimicking your smile before taking a sip and making a face as though he’d just taken a shot. Your smile grew.

“S’very strong love, but good” he assured you.

“Mmm what’s the point of a drink if it’s not strong enough to burn” you replied, not as a question but rather a strong statement again hitting him with that beautiful stare. You picked up your own drink (the same as the one you’d made for him) and said a quick “cheers” before downing most of it. Harry was about to say something but was quickly inturrupted by a group of people entering the bar area.

The group consisted of a few people Harry knew, immediately recognizing Lizzo, ASAP Rocky, Gigi and Bella Hadid but there were a few others with them he didn’t know (or atleast didn’t recognize). The smile on your face grew into a wide grin as Bella squealed and said your name, engulfing you in a bear hug. “Bells!” You giggled lightly into her shoulder before releasing from the hug.

“The show was incredible Y/N. You’re a fucking genius” she praised as she walked behind the bar, still smiling widely.

“You walked in it love” you reminded her, giggling as you went to greet Rocky. The two of you hugged tightly before releasing, Rocky’s hands going up to cup your face.

“You killed it baby, just like you always do” he said as he kissed your nose. You could feel Harry’s eyes burning into the side of your head as he chatted along with lizzo.

“Mm thank you Rocky, you know you’re my muse” you grinned wider as you kissed both his hands in appreciation.

Harry couldn’t help but watch your interaction with Rocky, you seemed so comfortable, so intimate. Harry felt a pang of jealousy run through his stomach at you calling Rocky your “muse”. He brushed it off with a clearing of his throat as he turned his attention back to lizzo. “You good H? Uh oh. Y/N made you one of her manhattans didn’t she?” Lizzo laughed loudly looking down at the drink in his hands before hitting Harry’s shoulder playfully, the question bringing your attention to them.

“Hey! My manhattans are world renowned Mel” (Lizzo’s real name is Melissa) you said proudly as you took a few steps forward, closing the distance between you and the couple. You pulled Lizzo in for a hug “m glad you came” you said as the two of you pulled apart.

“Of course! The collection is legendary as per” she replied genuinely. You thanked her and gave her a kiss on the cheek before turning your attention to Harry.

“If you’ll excuse Harry and I, Mel. He was just about to escort me outside for a smoke” you informed her, all well making full eye contact with Harry.

“Mhmmm you two have fun, come get me for shots later”

Harry followed you outside onto the large open balcony, watching you greet people on the way, doing the same if he knew the person. As soon as the two of you stepped outside Harry watched you take a deep breath, tipping your head back slightly to take in the fresh air. It looked almost erotic, even though it was just a simple action it made all Harry’s senses tingle. “How do’ya know Rocky?” Harry asked seemingly out of nowhere, it almost shocked himself. He knew he tends to get jealous rather easily, and maybe even a little possessive but usually it only comes out with people he’s exclusive with, not a women he’s never even kissed. And yet, there it was. He tried to sound casual but worried he failed terribly. You turned your head to him with a slight smirk before licking your lower lip and chuckling slightly.

“Oh, we’ve known each other for a long time. Met him at a party when I was first starting out” you said nonchalantly before grabbing a pack of cigarettes off the small table that sat on the deck. Harry nodded, understanding that you were in no way going to give away the nature of yours and Rockys relationship.

“I listened through your album again this morning” you admitted, effortlessly changing the subject back to him while taking a long drag of the cigarette you had just lit. Harry tried his best to hide the grin appearing on his face as he stared at you,

“did ya?” He asked waiting for you to continue your thought.

“Mhm. Listened to it in the shower” you hummed, as you leaned forward against the railing in front of the two of you, taking in the view and breaking eye contact.

The thought of you listening to Harry sing while completely naked in the shower made his skin feel like it was on fire and all his blood rush down to his groin. “What’s y’ favourite song?” He asked, leaning his back against the railing right next to you and looking down at your face. You looked up at him and hummed in thought.

“She” you said with a thoughtful, almost devious smile before standing up straight and putting out your smoke.

“Let’s go do shots, yeah?” Harry nodded with an amused smile as you grabbed his hand and pulled him back into the hotel.

Four shots and two hours later Harry found himself sitting on one of the couches to the right side of the open living room, watching you dance along with your friends in the middle. You looked so free, so careless, so magical. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you, trying to listen to whatever Jeff was trying to tell him to his right. “You’re not paying attention are you man?” Harry heard Jeff ask through a laugh as he followed Harry’s eyeline straight to you. Harry pried his eyes away from you to look at Jeff

“sorry mate. I’m listenin’” Harry told him, not really trying to be convincing.

“She’s an actress y’know. Not literally, but she knows how to get what she wants, she always has. But she’s got a good heart, just be careful alright?” Jeff said to him, patting his knee before standing up and walking over to glenne who was stood at the other side of the room.

Harry sat, watching you as he went over what Jeff had said to him a few moments ago. “She’s an actress”. Did he have to be careful? You didn’t look dangerous, but you did scare him a little. Not because he thought you’d physically hurt him or anything, but he knew if he’d let you, you could dig deep into his already fragile heart. Break it, possibly like it hadn’t been before.

Harry was brought out of his thoughts by seeing you turn your body towards where he was sitting, breaking yourself out of the group of friends that surrounded you. You made eye contact with Harry and motioned for him to come to you with your perfectly manicured right hand. You weren’t smiling, but he could see a glint of something he thought was amusement in your eyes. He got up and walked over to you. “You motioned fo’ me love?” He asked as he approached, a small smirk apparently on both your lips.

“Mhm, come” you said as you offered him your hand. He took your small hand in his as you ushered him through the growing crowd.

The two of you walked all the way through the living room, and passed the kitchen before entering a smaller room to the left of the kitchen. As you entered Harry took in his surroundings, it appeared to be an office space. There was a glass table in the center of the room with a large plate decorated with multiple lines of white powder on it, along with three chairs; one blue velvet and the other two grey of the same material. There were a few other people in the room, but Harry didn’t recognize them. “Some privacy please loves” you said aloud, asking them to leave Harry and yourself alone in the space. The strangers immediately obliged when they saw you, muttering greetings as they exited. You turned around to face Harry who was standing only slightly behind you.

“do you fancy a line Harry?” You asked, your hand coming up to touch his shoulder lightly.

“S’ a party innit?” He agreed, making you smile all too innocently given what he was agreeing to was quite the opposite. You walked over to the plate of narcotics, picking up the metal straw from beside it before holding it up to your nose. You bent over the table, flipping your hair over to the right side to make sure it didn’t get in the way as you breathed in deep through your nose inhaling a thick line of the powder. Harry watched as you stood up straight, tipping your head back and inhaling through your nose to make sure you got it all. You let out a cheery giggle before holding the straw out to Harry. He took it and did the same.

Just as Harry stood up straight you gently carressed his left cheek, staring into his blown out pupils. “God, you’re somethin’ else” he spoke just below a whisper, only loud enough for you to barely hear. He brought his large ring filled hand up to your waist as your hand fell from his cheek to his neck. He applied pressure to your waist encouraging you to move so your bum was pushed against the glass table. Once you obliged he moved even closer to you so your noses were practically touching, his hand moving to smooth itself over your back to hold you in place.

“Can I kiss you?” He asked, his voice much lower and more raspy than it had been. His eyes filled with desperation and lust. Instead of responding you giggled lightly and pulled him in by his neck, connecting your lips. The kiss was slow and messy, but filled with an undying passion. Your left hand squeezed his neck slightly, egging him on as one of his hands went to cup your jaw while the other one steadied on your waist. You opened your mouth slightly, inviting him in which he immediately took advantage of, sliding his tongue into your mouth. Both your lips were slightly numb from the coke but it did nothing but intensify the feeling. He tasted like whiskey and peppermint, making your head dizzy (in the most incredible way). You let your hands drop down to his waistband, slowly untucking the button down from his trousers and beginning to undue the buttons. Your eagerness made a low groan erupt from the back of his throat, feeling his boner growing rapidly at your touch. You broke the kiss as you finished unbuttoning his shirt, both of your breathing unsteady. He watched as you ran your hands up his torso slowly before pushing his sleeves off his wide shoulders. You made eye contact with him as he went to kiss you again, you stopped him shaking your head. You bent your head down slightly and licked his chest, starting from the top of his butterfly tattoo and ending just under his jaw. The feeling driving Harry completely insane with lust, goosebumps appearing all over his body as he let out a throaty moan

“y’ drivin’ me fuckin’ crazy” he said as you came up, standing up straight.

“Sit” you spoke, pointing at the large blue velvet chair next to you, not breaking eye contact. You could still hear the booming music and people taking from the other rooms as you watched him sit. You turned around so your back was facing Harry as you undid the tie that held up the top part of your jumpsuit letting it fall down, exposing your entire torso and back.

You heard Harry mutter a low “fuck” as you turned around and positioned yourself on top of him, successfully straddling his lap.

You could feel the exceedingly large bulge through his pants pressing against your crotch as he began kissing down your neck and towards your breasts causing you to moan slightly.

“Please Harry” you said breathlessly, giving him some control as you began slowly grinding back and forth against him.

“Tell me princess. Tell me what ya want” he raspily requested as he gripped onto your hips with both his hands, guiding your movements.

“I want you to fuck me harry, I want you to use me” you said still grinding against him while looking down slightly into his eyes as he stared back up at you. Without hesitation he lifted you, firmly holding onto your bum as he stood up and set you down on the table.

“Lift up love” he ordered, you leaned back on your hands and lifted up for bum so he could pull down the remaining part of your jumpsuit. After discarding the material to the side, taking your nude pumps along with it, he took a moment to take in your practically naked body. You grinned widely at his reaction as he began to grope your boobs, once again connecting his lips with yours. You reached your hands down to undo the button of his pants, using your skilled fingers you got them down in record time. You looked back up at him to see his eyes already staring at you. You placed your hands on either side of his face while his still ran along your nude body.

“Please Harry, I need your cock” you whispered seductively causing his whole body to go into overdrive.

He quickly pulled down his already undone trousers and boxers before sliding your peach coloured thong to the side, feeling your dripping pussy with his index finger and letting out an animalistic groan. You watched as he grabbed his large dick with his left hand, lining himself up at your entrance before turning his gaze back to your face. You both held eye contact as he entered you. The feeling completely overwhelming both of you, you leaned your head back, gripping roughly onto his back as you both let out a strangled moan. “Fuck” you moaned “you’re so big”. Your words egging him on, he picked up his pace pumping in and out of you slow but rough. He kept his focus on your face, watching as you moaned his name and praised him. You looked like a complete wet dream, your eyes barely open, your head tilted back as you stared at him through your eyelashes refusing to break eye contact.

“Good girl.... y’ take me so fucking good” he moaned, his ringed fingers digging harshly into your hips as his grip tightened. You lifted your head and moved your hands to his neck pulling him in closer so that his face was not even an inch away from yours.

“Harder Harry, fuck me harder” you moaned, completely out of breath. He started pounding into faster, all the sounds of the hectic party just outside completely drowned out by the sound of his balls slapping harshly against you and your shared moans. You finally broke eye contact when you leaned your head to the side and began leaving messy wet kisses along his jaw before meeting his neck with your mouth. You bit down roughly onto the skin of his neck earning a throaty moan from him. You licked over the spot you’d just bitten, soothing the pain a bit before he pulled your head back, balling your hair into his fist so you would look at him.

“Dirty little princess y’ are... leavin’ marks on me” he growled into your mouth before rejioning your lips to his and continuing his relentless pace with his hips.

You could feel your orgasm approaching rapidly, the overwhelming tingling travelling all throughout your body, all your senses becoming increasingly clear. “Y’ gonna cum fo’ me love?” He asked as he felt your walls becoming even tighter around his shaft. You nodded rapidly.

“Such a good girl... s’ fuckin tight” he said in between breathless moans.

“Cum fo’ me princess, I wanna feel you” he repeated, moving his right hand from its place on your waist to rub your clit, matching the pace of his hips. You could feel it happening, your vision blurred, your toes curling, your legs shaking rapidly as you dig your nails deep into Harry’s black, holding on for dear life.

“Fuck, Harry. Fuck” you repeated over and over as you came hard around his thick cock.

“Fuck Y/N, y’ gonna make me cum” he moaned into your neck as you held onto his shoulders.

“Cum for me harry, please” you whispered in his ear between moans of your own. You could feel his body start to weaken as he twitched inside of you, about to cum. You wrapped your legs around his hips tightly and pulled him in closer as he let out a loud raspy moan. You felt thick ropes of cum shoot deep inside you.

Once he came down from his high he kept his head rested on your shoulder, your arms and legs still wrapped tightly around him, both of you desperately trying to catch your breath. After a few seconds you both released, your legs falling down beside his as he stood. You made eye contact and you giggled lightly making him smile boyishly. Both of your hair a complete and utter mess, breathing heavily, and completely naked. The plate of cocaine that once sat on the side of the table was now shattered on the floor. “Your insane” Harry said before he laughed looking around the room, really taking in everything that happened. You laughed with him as you hopped off the table and walked over to where he had thrown your jumpsuit and shoes.

“I’m going to assume you meant that as a compliment.” You said as you pulled your jumpsuit up over your nude body.

“F’ course love. You’re a fuckin minx” he complimented as he buttoned up his shirt.

“You’re not so bad yourself, Harry” you shot back with a quick wink as you finished putting you shoes on.

End note: Ahh thank you so much for reading!! I’m kind of nervous about posting this, so please let me know what you thought! I’d seriously appreciate it. And if you liked it please please reblog :) I know the ending is kind of abrupt but it’ll make sense in the next part. Also, there will be ANGST coming up !

#fanfic #smut #harry styles x fem!reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x you #harry styles #solo harry #harry x reader #series #fanfiction #fandom #fine line #oneshots #x reader

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crystalninjaphoenix · 4 years ago

Text

Puzzles & Pleas

A JSE Fanfic

A new part whoooo! As I’m writing this description I’m very tired so I’m not sure what to say. We’re basically following up directly from the last part, like literally only a few hours later. Chase and Marvin are having a nice visit with Jack, and at the exact same time, their other three friends are having a variety of bad times with Anti. Fun fun fun! Well, not for the characters, but probably for us. Enjoy :)

You can find the other stories under the pw timeline tag!

“You look nervous.”

“I’m not.”

“I mean, it’s understandable if you are—”

“I’m not fucking nervous, Chase.”

The elevator doors opened, forcibly stopping the brief exchange. Chase stepped out onto the third floor, glancing back over his shoulder at Marvin. “Well, if you were, I was just gonna say it’s okay to be. Now c’mon.”

Marvin hesitated. Despite what his protests would indicate, he did look rather anxious. He kept twisting the edge of his shirt around. But he took a moment to steady himself and followed Chase out of the elevator, saying nothing.

“It’s just the same room,” Chase said, gesturing down the hospital hallway. “Let’s go.”

They walked in silence for a while, passing by closed doors, each with a room beyond. Chase kept looking back towards Marvin. This would probably be the first time he’d left his house in a couple weeks, something that Chase knew from experience wasn’t good for your health. Marvin looked fine, physically. His hair was combed and pulled back in a ponytail, his shirt and pants neat. But he just seemed...not as energetic. If that made sense. Hopefully, this would be good for him.

They soon reached the room they were looking for. Chase was about to knock on the door when Marvin suddenly asked, “Do you think he’ll be mad at me?”

Chase blinked. Then laughed, in an effort to lighten the mood. “Why would he be mad at you?”

“I don’t know. I mean, I hardly ever went to visit him.” Marvin continued to twist the hem of his shirt. “A-and I haven’t seen him at all since he woke up.”

“Marv. Trust me. Jack wouldn’t be mad at you for something like that.” Chase instinctively went to pat him on the back, but Marvin leaned away, so he dropped it and settled for a reassuring smile. “He’s not that type of guy.”

“Would he be...disappointed?” Marvin asked tentatively.”I-I don’t want to make him feel bad, he probably has enough to deal with—”

“It’s going to be alright, Marvin. Jack knows you didn’t mean to hurt him by not visiting. And besides, you’re visiting now, aren’t you? So it all works out.” Chase waited for Marvin to say more, but he just nodded, breathing out slowly. “Alright, we’re gonna go in now, okay?” Marvin nodded again, and Chase knocked on the door before slowly opening it. “Hello? It’s me.”

Jack turned to look towards the door. The moment he saw Chase, he smiled, and reached to the side and adjusted the controls of the bed to a sitting position. “Hii Shhays.”

“Hey bro. Look, I brought a friend.” Chase stepped into the room, allowing Marvin to take his place in the doorway.

Marvin froze for a moment. He stared at Jack, taking in the bed, the wires, the oxygen tube. Then he waved. “Um...hi.”

“Mahfin!” Jack grinned even wider. “‘S good t’see yuh!” He waved Marvin over.

“Ha. Y-yeah, good to see you, too.” Marvin stepped inside. “Oh, uh, d’you want this open?”

“S’fffine.”

“Alright, then.” He closed the door.

“Hey, c’mon, Marv, sit down.” Chase walked over to the side of the bed, indicating one of the nearby chairs. “Get comfy in the plastic hospital chair.”

Marvin laughed, and followed Chase over to the bed. They both sat, and Jack leaned over to pick up his communication board from the nearby table. He pointed to the How are you? box.

“Eh. We’re alright, I guess,” Chase said, glancing at Marvin.

“I...well, I’ve been...” Marvin stopped, the words getting caught in his throat. “It’s fine, though. Probably nothing compared to what you’re going through.”

Jack frowned. It was a small, awkward gesture, something his facial muscles were still having trouble with. He indicated the I don’t think so box.

“What’s that s’posed to mean?” Marvin asked, confused.

“It means he’s doubting you,” Chase explained. Jack nodded.

“Well, I mean...it’s fine,” Marvin said slowly. “Honestly, I’d rather talk about you. Like, how are you doing? What are you doing? It can’t be too fun being stuck in here.”

Jack still looked unsure, but he shook his head, and tapped a box labeled I agree.

“You’ve got a TV in here now, though,” Chase said, pointing to the corner. A big box television sat on top of a wheeled cart. “It looks like the ones they used to bring into classrooms in elementary school, y’know?”

Marvin and Jack just stared at him. “I think that’s an American thing,” Marvin said. “Or at least, something that wasn’t common where we were from.”

“Ah. Well, they did it all the time. A couple classrooms had them bottled to the ceilings in the corner and you watched movies on it, but you were always too far away to see it properly.” Chase laughed a bit. “But still, there’s probably only so much TV you can take.”

Jack groaned, rolling his eyes. He emphatically tapped the I agree box.

Marvin smiled a bit. “Well, don’t you have hospital stuff to do? Like, examinations and shit?”

Jack pointed to the Yes box. “Therrs...th’rapy. Lotta it.”

“Yeah, like speech therapy, physical therapy, probably a million other kinds.” Chase nodded. “Oh, speaking of which, you sound much better! Good job, bro.”

“Thnkss.” Jack smiled a bit.

“Y’know, I did some, uh...I don’t know if it was physical therapy exactly, but I did some exercises as a kid,” Marvin recalled. “Because I was severely uncoordinated. Tripped over my own feet to the point Grandmam was worried about it.” He paused. “I don’t know what I mean by that. I guess I’m just saying I relate a bit. It’s probably not the same thing, though.”

“Nnoh, ‘sfine,” Jack assured him. “I geddid. Ah.” He made a face. “I. Get. It.”

“Good, then.” For a moment, there was just silence. It stretched long enough to get awkward, and just when Chase was about to change the subject, Marvin blurted out, “I’m sorry I never came to see you, Jack.”

Jack blinked. “Hm?”

“Well I did but—it wasn’t that often. A-and not since you woke up, and I’m really sorry about it, it’s just—I’ve been having...a...moment.” Marvin clenched his fists as he tried to find the words. Sign language wouldn’t work here; Jack couldn’t understand it. So he was stuck with verbal speech. Not always his strong suit. “You know, when you have...a moment? When it’s hard to do anything because you...don’t...really...feel like anything?” Chase nodded encouragingly, and Marvin took a deep breath. “It’s not because I didn’t want to come see you. I really did, I-I’m really happy you’re awake again! It’s just...my fault. I put it off for so long, and then I got nervous about it, like, that it would be weird to suddenly show up and start talking like nothing had happened—I-I do that a lot, y’know, that’s why I don’t really talk to anyone besides you guys—and it’s not you, it’s me, and I’m sorry.” He finished with a rush and then stopped, waiting, his posture stiff and tense.

Jack was quiet for a moment. Then, he leaned closer, reaching out and putting a hand on top of Marvin’s own. “Mahfin...Mmmahrf...Marrrfvin.” For a moment, he looked frustrated at his inability to pronounce his friend’s name properly, but then he took a deep breath, and moved on. “Mahrfin. ‘S not...yoh fahlt. Thin’s happen. ‘S alright. ‘M happy t’see yuh—yyou. Yohr herre now. An’ tha’s what’s...i-im....important.” And he smiled.

Marvin’s face swelled with a mix of emotions. Relief, hesitancy, joy. It brought tears to his eyes. “You’re sure?”

“Yeh. O’courrrse.”

“I...good. That’s...good.” Marvin wiped his eyes. “Y’know...if you’re having trouble, you could just call me Muffin or something, for the time being.”

Jack laughed. “Shurr, Maffin.”

The moment was interrupted by a faint buzzing sound. Chase jumped a bit, feeling something vibrate in his pocket. “Oh, uh, sorry guys.” He took out his phone, face turning red with embarrassment as the other two watched him. “I didn’t think anyone would be calling me.” He glanced at the screen. “Huh. I don’t recognize the number.”

“It’s probably spam,” Marvin dismissed.

“Maybe. Or it could be important. Like, the kids are in school now, what if their teacher’s calling?” Chase hesitated. “I’ll just—just see if it is spam, really quick.” He tapped the Accept button and pressed the phone to his ear. “Hello? Who’s this?”

——————

He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t breathe. Something was squeezing his chest, his lungs—something was inside him, it was—no, no it wasn’t. This was panic. That had to be the explanation. He had to calm down, and—and do...something.

Schneep had woken up a few minutes ago. It took him a while to remember what happened before that. How someone had been in his room. No...not just someone. He knew—it was him, it was—there was no escape, there had never been any escape—

Okay. Calm down. Breathe. Focus on the facts. He was lying on the floor. In a strange room that he didn’t recognize. Near the wall. And he wasn’t alone. But he couldn’t focus on that fact now, it just made it hard to breathe again, thinking about being watched, being stared at, being—stop. Calm. Breathe.

Maybe if he looked around, it would help. But there wasn’t much to see in the room. The walls were dark gray, the floor was rough white carpet. There was a circular black rug in the middle. And a window with blinds. Besides those features, the only thing of note in the room was...a desk. And its chair, with someone sitting in it. But he didn’t want to look towards that. What about...the window? Was there anything outside?

He hesitated, and briefly glanced back towards the desk. It looked like the chair’s occupant was busy, attention fully focused on the computer monitors on the desk’s surface. But he knew he was still being watched. Perhaps...if he moved slowly, then it wouldn’t be too strange? It would be natural?

Deciding that was worth a shot, Schneep cautiously sat up. His head was still a bit dizzy, and heavy, too. He grimaced, then glanced out the window. The glass was a bit dirty, and looked unusually...thick, if that made sense. Outside, he could see a street corner, and houses. This room was in a house like that, then? And it was at an intersection, with a pair of street signs marking the roads that crossed here. Unfortunately, he couldn’t make out the street names this far away without his glasses. But one of them had some graffiti on it, a spray-painted square with a diamond inside it, and a black dot inside that. It might’ve been more elaborate than that, but again, he couldn’t quite make out the details.

“I see you.”

Schneep yelped, pressing against the wall as he turned to look towards the desk. Anti. He’d turned around in his desk chair and was staring at him now. Staring with those mismatched eyes that haunted his nightmares.

“Enjoying the view?” Anti nodded towards the window. “Sorry, not much to see. Nothing particularly helpful. Especially since you can’t read the street signs from this distance without your glasses.”

He knew what he was thinking?! Was he in his head again?! Schneep squeezed his eyes shut, shook his head, and opened them again. No, that wasn’t true. Anti was human, he’d never read his mind, humans couldn’t do that.

“What? Do you think you’re safe up here?” Anti tapped the side of his head and grinned. “Don’t be so sure. You’re so easy to—”

“Shut up, you are lying,” Schneep interrupted. “You—you cannot do that anymore. I know it’s a trick.”

“You don’t know anything,” Anti said, still grinning. “Because I’ve been watching you. I know you’ve heard me. And I know you’ve told others about me. Don’t you remember what I said about that? The more people know about me, the stronger I become.”

“That is more lies,” Schneep insisted, pressing his back to the wall.

“I’ve never lied to you. And I’m not about to start now. I’ve been watching you. I know you’ve seen my shadow in the corners, and my eyes in the ceilings.”

“How do you know about that?!” Schneep shrieked.

“Because I sent them, of course. To keep an eye on you, make sure you didn’t break any rules.” Anti sighed dramatically and shook his head. “I hoped it wouldn’t be needed, but I thought, better safe than sorry. And it turns out I was right.”

Schneep pressed his hands to his ears, trying to block out Anti’s words. They had to be lies. He knew that Anti wasn’t some supernatural creature, he was just a man. Anti had to be guessing about the things he saw. Though...how did he guess about the eyes in the ceilings? Schneep couldn’t remember telling him about them, and that had to be a fairly specific hallucination. Maybe he really...? No, there had to be another explanation.

Anti laughed, and Schneep flinched at the sound. His eyes darted around the room once more. There was a door, but it was on the other side of the room, and he was willing to bet it was locked. Same with the window. He could try to break the window, but there was nothing to break it with. Unless he wanted to try and grab one of the computer monitors and throw it through the glass, but he knew he’d be overpowered if he tried.

“That’s right, you’ve got no way out,” Anti said, leaning back. “You’re lucky I haven’t tied you to a chair or anything. The only reason I haven’t done that is because you know it’s hopeless, anyway. Unlike certain others...wearing red jackets.”

Schneep felt a chill pass over him. Jackie. Of course. Anti still had him captive. “I-it’s different, now,” Schneep protested weakly. “They know about you, a-and me, and that we are not the same. They will be trying to rescue me this time.”

“Probably,” Anti admitted. He grabbed something off the desk and stood up, approaching. Schneep’s eyes widened, and he pressed further into the wall, pulling his legs and arms close. “That is, they’ll be trying a search and rescue as long as they think I’m involved.” Anti stopped, standing over Schneep, and leaned down. “So here’s what’s going to happen.” He showed him the thing he’d grabbed from the desk: a phone. “You’re going to call the lovely Dr. Laurens and tell her you left on your own.”

“What...wh-why would I do that?” Schneep stammered.

“Because you got scared. Because you didn’t feel safe in that hospital. Because you told her you saw Anti in the hospital rec room, and you think that he’s real, and that he can come after you.” Anti smiled. “It’s built on truth, isn’t it? Because you told her you saw me, didn’t you?”

Schneep stared at him in disbelief. He had told Laurens about seeing Anti in the rec room. At the time, he thought it was just him seeing things, but...had it been real? The whole time? And how did Anti know he’d told Laurens about that?

Because he hears your thoughts. He can twist them to control you.

No! No, that wasn’t real. But...the idea still lingered.

“What are you waiting for?” Anti held out the phone, staring at him. Staring, staring, staring. Always staring.

Schneep swallowed a sudden lump in his throat. “..okay. I will call her.”

Anti didn’t say anything as he took the phone, still watching him as he dialed the phone number. Schneep tried not to think about it too much as he held the phone to his ear and listened to the call connect.

The other end rang for a long time, and Schneep swiftly grew afraid that nobody would pick up. But just when he thought it would hang up, the ringing stopped. “Hello? Who’s this?”

“Um. Hello.” Schneep reminded himself to breathe. “It’s me, it is—well, you can probably tell by the voice.” The voice that was shaking quite a bit.

“What the f—Schneep?!” The voice on the other end shouted in disbelief. “Why are you calling me?! No, wait, how are you calling me? I thought you weren’t allowed to have a phone there.”

“No, I—there is—something has happened,” Schneep said carefully. “I-I am not at Silver Hills anymore.”

“Well then where the hell are you?!”

“I am...I am somewhere...else,” Schneep said slowly.

“Yeah, where?”

Anti narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “Get to the point,” he hissed.

Schneep froze for a moment. He needed to speak freely. “It’s because of—of him,” he said carefully. “You know who I mean, yes?”

“You mean...Anti?” The other end went silent for a minute. “Schneep where are you? Can you tell me, give me a clue or something? I-I’ll call the police, but if you could tell me anything—”

Anti frowned. “Put it on speaker,” he said.

Schneep’s heart sank. Impossible. Anti would immediately know that he hadn’t called the right person. He had to do something drastic. “Er ist es, er hat mich mitgenommen,” he said, speaking quickly. “Ich weiß nicht wo ich bin.” Anti’s eyes widened, and he lunged forward. Schneep cried out, and rolled to the side, just avoiding him. “Ich weiß nicht wo ich bin! Ein Haus an einer Straßenecke—Ich kenne die Straßennamen nicht! Das Schild hat Graffiti, es ist ein Kreis in einem Diamanten in einem Quadrat—”

“You little—!” Anti grabbed Schneep’s wrist and twisted the phone out of his hand.

“Bitte komm—!” Schneep didn’t manage to get the rest of the sentence out before—

Smack!

He fell to the side, half of his face suddenly alight in pain. For a moment, he was too dazed to respond properly. Then Anti grabbed him by the shirt and pulled him upward. He instantly started struggling.

“You worthless little fucker,” Anti hissed, grabbing a handful of Schneep’s hair and pulling his head backwards. “Can’t believe you did that. Fuck. You deserved that. Your friend’s gonna have worse for that stunt you just pulled.”

“N-no!” Schneep gasped. “Leave him alone!”

“No, you know the rules. You know how this works.” Anti glared at him. “You’ve just gotten cocky. So you need a reminder.”

Schneep felt a tear trickle from his eye. He hoped that call was worth it.

——————

“Schneep?! Henrik?! Are you there?!” Chase shouted into the phone, but got no response. There’d been a rustling sound, like a struggle, then Schneep had shouted, and then there was—there was another sound, a sound he’d most often heard when his kids would fight each other, and he had to scold them. That sound was a lot more sinister in this context. Especially considering the call had apparently dropped after it. “Fuck!”

“What happened?!” Marvin asked, shaken by the half of the conversation he’d heard. “Was that really—?”

“H-hang on, I’m gonna call his doctor first,” Chase said. He hurried to dial the number for Dr. Laurens, misdialing at first because of his rush and entering it a second time.

The call was picked up surprisingly quickly. “Chase? Is that you?” Laurens’s voice came through loud and clear.

“Yeah, it’s me. Listen doc, is...is Schneep okay?” Chase didn’t know how else to ask.

“Is he—oh, Chase,” Laurens said softly. “I was just about to call you. We...we don’t know where he is.”

“You...don’t know where he is?” Chase repeated, feeling the bottom of his stomach dropping out. He heard Marvin gasp, and saw him squeeze Jack’s hand, who was now sitting up as straight as he could. “What do you mean?”

“He never showed up to dinner. When Oliver went to check on his room, he wasn’t there. We’ve been searching the building and the grounds, but he’s nowhere to be seen. I thought—since you’re his friend, a-and his emergency contact—wait a minute.” Laurens stopped, realizing something. “Why are you asking?”

“Because he just called me,” Chase explained. “From some number I didn’t recognize. He said that—he said that Anti took him.”

“Shit,” Laurens cursed. “Chase, I need you to hang up right now and call the police. We’ll keep searching the nearby area, just in case. I-I’ll call you if we find him.”

“Y-yeah. Okay. And I’ll call you again after I talk to the cops.”

“Great. Go do that.”

“I’m doing it. Talk to you later.” Chase hung up.

“So he just disappeared?!” Marvin whispered harshly. “Just—just like that night.” He glanced over at Jack.

“Wh’s happennin’?” Jack asked, his features drawn.

“You guys heard that call, right? Henrik called me, h-he was speaking...haltingly, I think, with a lot of pauses, I think that’s the word.” Chase squeezed his phone case. “Then he freaked out and started shouting in German—I bet because Anti can’t speak it.”

“What did he say?!” Marvin demanded.

“I don’t know all of it, it’s been a while since I—give me a second.” Chase opened up a translation app on his phone and quickly typed in a few words, trying his best to match the spelling of the things he thought Schneep had said. He had to fill in the gaps. “Okay. He said that Anti took him, and that he didn’t know where it was, but it was a house on a street corner. He couldn’t see the street names, but mentioned some sort of like...graffiti? On the sign? A circle in a diamond in a square.”

Jack’s head shot upward, and he cried out.

“What?! What is it?!” Marvin leaned forward, checking all the wires and monitors.

“Nn—noh that!” Jack clumsily pushed him back. “That sss...ssymmbel. Know it.”

“Wh—you recognize the symbol?!” Chase repeated in disbelief. “Square-diamond-circle?!”

Jack nodded. “H-he...fffakes. Th’ fakes, th’ one...prtendinn tuh be yuh two. I...rmemmber now.”

“Huh?” Marvin asked, utterly confused.

“Right, you don’t know,” Chase realized. “Jack, he—he’s said some stuff about fake versions of us visiting him. Anti, in disguise. I-I know, I ran into him pretending to be you one time, and I heard about an imposter me from Dr. Emerson another time. Apparently Anti talked to him, said some freaky stuff.” He gasped. “You mean—he told you about this symbol?”

“Symmbl. Symbel to...to haf others recogniss him.” Jack pressed his hands to his forehead and leaned forward. “Put outssside...places he...h-has? I don’...don’ rmemrrr.” He fell silent, squeezing his eyes shut. “On a sighhn...steet signnn...ffahk. Fahk!”

“I’m gonna call the police,” Chase said, already dialing 999. “I’m gonna tell them everything, a-and meanwhile, try to remember anything else.”

Jack nodded, eyes still shut. Marvin squeezed his shoulder, an anchor to the physical world. He could hear Chase’s voice relaying what happened over the phone, but the words were indistinct as he tried to concentrate on his memory. Everything was all mixed up and blurred. None of it made sense most of the time. He remembered hearing voices, but he wasn’t sure when it was Chase, when it was this Anti, or when it was just a dream. But he’d definitely heard that description of a symbol before. When...when had he...when...when......?

——————

......

...

“It’s a calling card. Or a warning, if you want to think of it that way...simplified version of my...”

...

The man had no eyes. Or maybe he was just missing one eye. A blank, dark spot in the middle of a white face. He looked like a friend, but that dark spot was wrong. It told him it was a lie.

“Most people don’t know what it means exactly, only that it’s trouble. The area...claimed.”

And the voice was wrong. It...it sounded a bit like his own, actually? Was this...him?

Was that why he couldn’t move? Why he couldn’t look away?

“...outside safe houses, where I store my...and other equipment. They’re also secondary bases. Just in case...never know in this line of work. I don’t want...caught. Living...prison...just be the worst. You have no control.”

The man was smiling. His teeth stretched...his skin was melting. He—he couldn’t understand. What was happening? Who...was this man...? Was he him? Who are you? Who am I? Are we the same? I can’t understand. Something...something is broken up here. My thoughts...they’re scattering. Like throwing paper in a bowl of water, watching it soak it up, then stirring violently. Everything came apart.

“I’m never going to let anyone control me. No. I am in control. Everyone else...my little puppets. I like watching the shows.”

The white ceiling and walls were burning his eyes. It was curving, like a bubble. They were in a bubble. He was floating. He couldn’t feel anything.

“...times I worry about you telling people. But then I—” Laugh. Laugh. Laugh. “I remember you’re a veggie. People rarely wake...after something so severe. So...doesn’t matter. Maybe you can hear me. Maybe you can’t. Doesn’t...”

Green line. Up and down. Up and down. Crossing the man’s face. Cutting him in half.

“Why am I even doing this?”

Green light. Everything is green.

“I don’t even know. It’s a waste of time, a waste of resources, and a risk. Maybe...need it? I’ve never talked so freely. Not even to Jamie. He...a kid, you know. Always will be.”

Light is gone. Everything is black.

“...it doesn’t really matter what I say. I can tell you about the marks outside the houses. Ha. Hell, I can even tell you where they are. Like, for example, on the corner of—”

——————

Jack’s eyes flew open. “Ah!”

“Wh—?!” Marvin jumped a bit. “Jack?”

“Th’ steet! Strreet! Is—is—” Now the problem was just getting his mouth to form the sounds properly. “Ay...airrr...loom.”

Marvin blinked. “Air loom?”

“Hhay. Hhhhair loom.”

“Oh, heirloom? I don’t know that street, uh...” Marvin turned to look at Chase. “Did you catch that?”

Chase nodded in response, still on the phone, then returned to his conversation with the emergency line. “Um—maybe try on one of the corners of Heirloom Drive? My friend thinks that might be it.” A brief pause. “Uh, I don’t know.” And he looked over at Jack, pulling the phone away a bit. “Hey bro, do you...remember the other street? It’s at an intersection, right?”

Jack closed his eyes again. But this time, the memory wouldn’t even come to him. “No.”

“That’s fine.” Chase returned to the phone. “My friend doesn’t know, but on the phone call he said—my other friend—said that there was some sort of graffiti on the sign, that was a uhh square around a diamond around a circle. That probably helps right?” He paused. “No, I don’t think he’d see them. He’s near-sighted, and I don’t think he has his glasses. That probably means that the graffiti description is pretty vague, but it’s an idea.” Another pause. “Yeah, that’s it. Oh, wait, uh...I think Detective Nix was involved in this case? Can you tell him?” And another. “Yeah, his name’s Henrik.” And one last, long pause. “Alright, thank you ma’am. I’ll wait.” And he hung up, letting out a long exhale.

“It—it’s going to be fine, right?” Marvin asked anxiously. “They’ll find him?”

“It might take a while, but I think so,” Chase replied. “God...Hey, uh, Jack? You’re sure about this?”

Jack thought about it, then nodded slowly, head bobbing. That memory was a bit weird, but Dr. Emerson told him it was common to have dream-like memories, with everything that had happened to him. He was confident that the conversation was real. He couldn’t forget the times Anti came to visit, just because of how deeply unnerving his words always were.

“Alright. Well, they’re going to call me to update me on what happens,” Chase said. “Uh...not sure how long this’ll take. Visiting hours might end before they sort everything out.”

“Mm.” Jack shrugged. He picked up the communication board again—he’d just done a lot of talking, and needed a moment—and pointed to the I’m okay box.

“You sure?”

Yes box.

“Well we’re not leaving until they kick us out,” Marvin asserted, folding his arms. “If they call us back, you need to hear it. You just helped out a fuckton.”

Jack smiled, a bit lopsidedly. Thank you box.

Chase laughed, but it quickly faded. He looked down at the phone in his hand, already anticipating the call. “I guess...we just wait now.”

——————

There were footsteps passing by outside the room. At first, Jameson had tensed, waiting for the door to open and Anti to walk inside. But that didn’t happen. They just kept passing back and forth. You hear those, right? JJ asked.

Jackie didn’t respond, so JJ looked back over at him. He was lying on the bottom bed of the bunk and staring up, eyes glazed. Something he’d been doing quite a lot, JJ noticed. When he asked about it, Jackie always said he was daydreaming, which would be fine normally, but JJ was pretty sure that he was doing it too much. Well, he couldn’t blame him. But still, it would be nice if Jackie would look at him when he was signing.

Jameson walked over and, after a moment’s hesitation, shook Jackie’s shoulder. He blinked, made an odd gesture like he was asking someone to wait, then looked at JJ. “What?”

Have you been hearing the footsteps outside? JJ asked.

“Huh? Oh, uh, sorry. No. I wasn’t really paying attention,” Jackie admitted. “What do they sound like?”

Like someone’s running up and down a hallway outside, JJ described.

“Really? Well...I mean, I can’t really think of anyone but Anti who’d be doing that.” Jackie’s face scrunched up in thought. “Maybe he’s...doing something? I dunno. Running, though...it must be important.”

Jameson frowned. That was a good point, why would Anti be running about? I’m going to try to look outside, he said, walking over to the door.

“Look outside?” Jackie sat up, turning so he was on the edge of the bed. “You mean, through the gap?”

JJ nodded. He got down on his hands and knees and pressed his head to the floor, peering through the gap under the door. Nothing much to see. He got to his knees and was about to stand up...when he heard the footsteps again. Wanting to see what happened as they passed by the door, he quickly peered through the gap between the door and the doorframe. The steps were approaching—

Then the door slammed open, directly into Jameson’s face. He cried out as he fell, clasping his hands to his face.

“Oh my god, Jamie?! I’m so sorry!” Anti covered his mouth, staring down at him in shock. “It was an accident, I didn’t expect you to—are you okay?!”

Jameson didn’t answer. His face was in pain, and his nose in particular was throbbing. He pulled one hand away and saw it covered in blood, felt it trickling from his nostrils and soaking into his mustache.

“Shit. Fuck! I-it’ll be fine, I can—i-is it broken?” Anti bent over, grabbing Jameson’s head and trying to inspect the damage. But Jameson pulled away, waving at him to get back. “Hey, I just—okay, fine. This isn’t the time. We can look at it later.” Anti took his phone out of his pocket and checked the clock. “We need to go.”

Go? Did he say go? As in, they were leaving? Jameson stood up, keeping one hand on his face, trying and failing to stop the bleeding from getting everywhere. Why did they have to leave? More importantly, why was Anti trying to move the two of them? Unless...something happened that meant he had to move them. Like...the police coming. At that thought, Jameson started backing away.

“Jamie, this isn’t a joke, we need to leave now.” Anti insisted.

Jameson shook his head. He glanced over his shoulder at Jackie. Judging by the wide-eyed expression on his face, he’d come to the same conclusion as him. It was strange to see the glimmer of hope in his eyes. And that thought made Jameson’s heart hurt.

“Are you going to—?! Fuck, I don’t have time for this.” Anti rubbed his eyes, then adjusted the strap of the bag hanging off his shoulder. He stared at Jameson for a moment. Then followed his line of sight over to Jackie. For a moment, he hesitated, thinking about something. And then he made a decision. “Okay, fine.” Anti pushed past Jameson, reaching into his bag as he did so. He grabbed Jackie, yanking him upwards to a standing position, and pressed a knife to his neck.

Jameson gasped. “A-an!”

“I’m going to kill him,” Anti said calmly. “I’ve been thinking about it, and I can’t handle three of you after all. And he’s the most useless.”

“A...aan.” Jameson shook his head slowly. He didn’t dare to take a step forward. Jackie had looked terrified when Anti grabbed him, but the moment he said he was going to kill him, all emotion seemed to drain out of him. Now he was slumped, eyes blank, not there at all. Please, Jameson simply signed.

Anti looked him in the eyes. “The only way you can convince me not to is if you come with me right now.”

Oh.

So...that was the plan.

Jameson wasn’t sure why he wasn’t more shocked. No...no, actually, he knew why. But somehow, it surprised him to feel this lack of...well, surprise.

But in any case, he couldn’t let Jackie die. Alright, he signed slowly. I’ll go with you.

“Good. Follow me.”

Anti walked out of the room, right through the door, and Jameson followed behind him, quietly. He tried to catch Jackie’s eye, but Jackie wasn’t paying attention to anything at all. He just let Anti pull him along with the blade at his throat.

They went down a hallway and arrived in another, which they then walked down to arrive at a door. Anti pushed it open with his shoulder, and then they were in a small backyard, hardly more than a strip of grass. Jameson glanced at the neighboring houses, but they looked empty. But...maybe someone could see them? Maybe someone would call the police, if they hadn’t already been called.

There was a car parked in the gap between their house and one of the neighbors. It didn’t have anything distinct about it, a simple, gray, four-door car. But the trunk was a bit open. Jameson caught a glimpse of some sort of suitcase—maybe multiple suitcases—before Anti kicked the lid closed. “Stupid boot,” he muttered. “Jameson, get in the passenger side. Leave the door open.”

Well, he didn’t have much of a choice, did he? Jameson walked around to the passenger side and got in, sitting stiffly on the edge of the seat. He wiped his face, clearing up blood from his nosebleed.

“Good.” Anti nodded once. He then shifted his knife to his other hand, still keeping it pointed at Jackie, and used his other to rummage around in his bag until he pulled out a small bottle. He popped the lid open. “Hold out your hand.” When Jameson did, Anti shook a few small pills out of the bottle and into his palm. “Swallow three of those.”

That was the part that got Jameson to finally say something. Or, try to, at least. “A-annn? Yuh...c-c-cannn’...beee sss—”

“Don’t do this, Jamie,” Anti said through gritted teeth. “I know what you’re trying to do. Just eat them, okay?” He put the bottle back in his bag and switched the knife between hands again. He pressed it firmly into Jackie’s neck, causing a drop of blood to trickle down from where the blade met skin.

Jameson nodded, and hurriedly threw the pills in his mouth. Anti watched him closely, making sure they were eventually swallowed. “Good,” he said again. Then he closed the car door. Immediately, Jameson heard the clunk of the lock. He was expecting that...but he wasn’t expecting Anti to walk back towards the back door they’d come from, taking Jackie with him.

“Hhh—!” Jameson pressed his face and hands to the window. “Aaaan! N-nuh!” He banged a fist against the glass. “Nnnuh! Nn—n-n-no!” He screamed. But Anti didn’t even look towards him as he disappeared back into the house with Jackie.

He tried pulling at the door, but of course, found it useless. And looking around the inside showed there wasn’t a way to open the car from the inside. That was probably a safety hazard, but Jameson was willing to bet that Anti had the car modified. He spun around in his seat, looking for anything that would be of help in the back. But there was nothing. Except for...a man. Asleep, sitting in the back seat. Pale skin and brown hair, with a yellow-purple bruise forming on his cheek. Jameson was confused for a moment, until he noticed the plastic medical bracelet around the man’s wrist and remembered. That was Henrik, wasn’t it? Schneep? He hadn’t recognized him. Of course, they’d only met once, and Schneep had spent most of it freaking out, thinking that Jameson was Anti. He looked unharmed, but he was clearly unconscious, and therefore couldn’t help them get out of the car.

Frustrated, Jameson started kicking at the door, leaning back to build up as much force as possible. He tried hitting the window. But it felt as solid as the actual door. This went on for a few moments, until he saw the back door opening again. And Anti came back outside. Alone.

That made him stop, fear shooting through his heart.

Soon, Anti sat down in the driver’s seat. “Alright, finally,” he said under his breath, glancing up at the dark, early-night sky. “We’ve wasted enough time—”

Smack!

Anti was too surprised to even cry out as Jameson’s fist connected with enough force to whip his head to the side. “Y—you just—” He pressed his hand to his cheek and looked at Jameson in disbelief. “Jamie, you hit me.”

Don’t fucking call me that! Jameson threw his hands in Anti’s face, almost hitting him again. Not after all that! You don’t deserve it! You’re the most horrible person I know!

Anti glanced back towards the house. “He’s not dead.”

Well I don’t trust a word you say!

“Just...” Anti sighed, and rubbed his cheek. “Just go to sleep and be quiet, Jameson.”

Oh, you’d like that, wouldn’t you? Jameson seethed. You’d like to have a perfect, quiet, naive kid brother that you can protect and therefore feel good about yourself for once. Well he doesn’t exist. Not one of those words describes me. Jameson turned away. Don’t ever call me your brother again. You make me sick.

Anti didn’t say anything in response, and Jameson refused to even look at him. The car started, then pulled out of the driveway and onto the street.

As the house on the corner faded into the distance, Jameson’s anger lessened, overtaken by the fear and all-consuming worry he’d felt before. He could only hope that Anti wasn’t lying about Jackie. And he didn’t like that. He didn’t like relying on this...person for anything. But, unfortunately, he was at his mercy for the time being.

He had to find a way out. Not now, though. He could already feel the sleeping pills starting to take effect. But as Jameson closed his eyes, he swore that he wouldn’t let Anti be in control of anyone ever again.

#jacksepticeye #jacksepticeye fanfiction #jacksepticegos #septic egos #jacksepticeye au #septic egos au #chase brody #marvin the magnificent #antisepticeye #dr schneeplestein #jameson jackson #jackieboy man #brigid writes fanfiction #pwtimeline

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suchalonelysunflower · 5 years ago

Text

“Entangled” (c.h) (h.s)

Pairing: Calum Hood X Reader / Harry Styles X Reader

Requested: Yes!

Summary: You never wanted to be caught up in a love triangle, you never asked to be entangled in this situation. Now you have a choice to make. You know it has to be one of them at the end but, who would it be? And why is it so hard?

Warnings: Love Triangle! Pinning, unrequited love, language, angsty with a little fluff, mentions of alcohol and some grammatical error (English is not my first language, I’m sorry)

Word Count: 7.2 k

Author’s Note: Requested by my darling @rime-warrior a few weeks ago, I decided to turn her wonderful promt into a series. This part serves as the intro of the series! It starts with the reader in the “present” (just go with it) and then it will follow their journey with the boys since 2014. Reblogs, comments and feedback are always welcome 💕 You can read my other works for Harry and 5SOS HERE. Hope you like it and happy reading 🦋✨

@rime-warrior : Hi! I’m back lol I loved the heather imagine and I was wondering if you could do a calum/reader/Harry imagine where they’re on tour and trying to get the readers attention by being goofballs

Part 1: The beginning.

Never in a million years did you think you would end up making a decision like this. Hell, never in a million years did you think you would be here in the first place! If somebody would’ve come to you a year ago to tell you that you would’ve been in one of the biggest reunion tours of one of the biggest boy bands that's ever existed and one of the greatest pop/alt bands of the new generation you’d call them crazy and probably pepper spray them as you run away. But here you are and, surprisingly, it’s the last place you want to be at.

You are currently sitting at the stairs outside the venue, it’s the last concert on the “Here We Go Again” One Direction/5 Seconds of Summer Reunion Tour. Tapping your feet relentlessly against the cold metal and regretting not bringing a jacket with you as you can hear the fans going crazy inside the stadium, and who could blame them? They waited so long to see their favorite people again, not only that but together! After almost six years apart. You would’ve been just like them if it weren’t for the stomach ache your nerves are giving to you at this exact moment.

You knew what you had to do. It was the right thing after all, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt like crazy. Somehow you were going to lose someone tonight and you weren’t ready for that, you’ll never be ready for that.

How the hell did this all start in the first place? How did you become so entangled in this mess without realizing? And how would you get out of it?

So many thoughts are running through your head, yet none of them seem to stick around for more than ten seconds before rushing onto another. Head spinning at a thousand miles per hour as you clenched your fists at the side of your body, knuckles turning white as they grasped the cold and dirty metal of the staircase.

You could run… you were kinda fast and they are all inside so they wouldn’t be able to catch you. Maybe you could move to Peru, you always wanted to visit Machu Picchu and its alpacas, plus the ponchos look really good on you. The problem was that 1. You didn’t know Spanish. 2. You had exactly 9.57 dollars left on one of your pockets because you left your wallet inside and 3. You weren’t a coward.

Well, you were. That's why you let it come this far. But you were not going to do that anymore. You need to make a decision and it has to be tonight. But why was it so hard though?

***************************************************

A few years ago

“Y/N! C’mon!” You heard your best friend say “We are going to be late again!”

Lottie was impatiently pacing around the hotel room once again, she had her bags around her shoulders as she considered leaving you behind.

“You know I have to start early today! There’s gonna be four more people to style and I don’t want to do it all rushed.” She whined, sitting on one of the beds.

You came out of the bathroom soon after, cheeks a little bit flushed because it wasn’t like you to slow things down, especially when it came to work. But you wanted to look cute today, well, more cute than usual.

The tour was about to start and you were lucky enough that management let you come with Lottie to work on the stylish team with her. Her older brother, Louis, was a close friend of yours as well, so when he proposed the idea a few months back, you just couldn’t resist.

“Sorry, love” you replied sheepishly “I lost track of time”

Lottie lifted her gaze towards you and rolled her eyes playfully “Oh, shush. You and I both know that you are bluffing. I know exactly what you’re doing wearing that outfit and honestly? Can’t blame ya”

She was right, she’s always right when it comes to these kinds of stuff.

It’s not like you’ve never met the guys! I mean, you know Louis and Zyan because of Lottie, you’ve never seen the other members of the band in person, yet. But it’s not like you don’t know them either, they are everywhere! It was impossible to escape from the impact One Direction had. And now you were going to work with them as a stylist, it seemed like a dream.

Not only that, but you were also in charge of styling the opening number: An Australian band called 5 Seconds of Summer that Louis likes. You don’t know much about them other than this is the second time they’ll open for One Direction and they’ll be around for the European and American leg of the tour. You googled them to have a reference of what they’d look like so you’ll know how to work around them and, honestly, where do they get those guys? They don’t even look like eighteen year olds! And they are also talented and successful at such a young age? You promised yourself that you were going to listen to some of their songs, but still haven’t gotten around to do it just yet, but tonight will definitely change that.

You were nervous. You could feel your hands get clammy just thinking about the pressure that’s on you to make those guys look like absolute gods on stage (though that wouldn’t be a challenge, knowing the nine of them are incredibly handsome already) But that thought didn’t ease you a bit. You wanted to be good. No, scratch that. You know you are good. You want to impress them, hence the cool outfit.

“Think you know it all?” You said, already grabbing a pillow and throwing it to Lottie’s face.

“I know it all, darling” She laughed, throwing it back at you “Now, move your ass. We need to ge to the stadium as soon as possible”

You could hear the fans from a mile away before you walked through the backstage doors. The adrenaline was contagious, everyone was moving around like crazy but you could feel the excitement in the air. You already knew this was where you were meant to be, haven’t even started but you love it already. This was meant to be.

Lottie was walking fast, easily leaving you behind as you stared in awe at your surroundings, not paying any attention towards where you were going until you felt something hard crashing into you, making you lose your balance and you fell to the floor with a massive weight crushing your lungs.

All you could feel was the painful sting that shocked your body as your ass touched the ground with a big “thud” Luckily, the person that knocked you down was quick enough to put a hand behind your head so you don’t hit it too harshly as it came in contact with the cement floors. You tried to curse but the weight in your chest made it almost impossible to talk, making you only gasp in surprise.

The person lying on top of you groaned in discomfort, they must’ve hurt themselves too when you both hit the ground. “Are you okay?” The deep voice said, trying to hide the pain. You opened your eyes at the sound of his voice and were shocked to find two green orbs staring right back at you.

Harry’s face was too close to yours. Noses almost brushing as you took in all the details on his panicked expression. He was beautiful. Breathtaking in the metaphorically and literally since he was still on top of you, crushing your chest with his.

You tapped on his arm trying to push him off you. He seemed to get the hint as he quickly apologized and stood up, offering you his hand to help you do the same. You gladly took it as the air came rushing back to your lungs, a little whine escaping your throat as you felt how your muscles ached after the impact.

“Oh shit, are you hurt?” Harry asked, faced filled with worry as he looked at you up and down, trying to make sure there were no visible injuries.

“Not really, but-“ You said bringing a hand to your lower back and rubbing it gently, hissing when you felt a hint of pain when you touched a certain spot “Definitely gonna bruise in a few hours”

“I am very, very sorry. I didn’t mean to- Do you need ice? I can get you some ice if you-“

“I’m fine” You raised your palm to cut him off, smiling as you saw how worried he actually was “Really, I’m fine. It could’ve been worse if it wasn’t for your hand working as a cushion for my head” You giggled “Are you okay, though?”

Harry nodded, smiling as well “I truly am sorry, I was not paying attention to where I was going”

“Well, that makes two of us. But why were you running?”

“Oh, ’m running away from my bodyguard. You see, they really don’t like it when you do that and steal the keys to the van” He said with mischievous eyes, flashing a smile as he showed you the key dangling in his finger. Soon after, you heard someone yell ‘Harry Styles come back here!’ You couldn’t help but laugh at how ridiculous the situation was. Harry stared at you for a little while, eyes gleaming at the sound of your giggles “Gotta go! Are you sure you’re okay…?”

“Y/N” You said, nodding your head.

“Y/N…” He repeated in a low voice, eyes scanning you once again as he backed away slowly “See yeh round, love” The last thing you saw was his flirty wink before he started running again.

You felt your cheeks get warmer but you were quick to hide it. This was your job, you need to be professional. Though, you gotta admit, having Harry Styles knocking you off your feet on your first day wasn’t bad at all. Really not bad at all.

“There you are!” You heard your best friend call from the other end of the hall “C´mon, we need to set everything up before they come here” Lottie came close to you, softly grabbing you by the hand and tugging it so you could follow her. She had an understanding smile on her face “Don´t worry, I was in the same position as you when I first visited the tour. It's amazing, isn't it?”

“Kinda intimidating, actually”

Lottie laughed and linked your arms together as you walked through the enormous hall downt to a small room.

You spent the next hour or so getting everything ready for when they come, laughing and joking around each other like you always do, making you almost forget that you were here to do a job and not just hang out. That's one of the many good things about the Tomlinsons, they make you feel so comfortable that you forget all your worries.

The playlist you chose was blasting on the small speaker you had brought to entertain yourselves while waiting for the boys. You were both laughing and jumping around with brushes in your hands, pretending they were microphones and you were having your own little concert with the Spice Girls. You were in the middle of your solo, already lost in the sound of Baby Spice´s voice when the door opened at the same time you were stretching your arm in an improvised dance move, accidentally hitting the person next to you with the heavy brush.

“Ouch!” The boy said as he quickly brought his hand to his nose, trying to make sure it wasn't bleeding.

You covered your mouth immediately and threw the brush into one of the cushions “Oh my- I´m so sorry. I'm so so so so sorry” You soon apologized and went over to him, trying to assess the damages and hoping you didn't break his nose “Are you okay? I really am sorry I didn´t-”

The boy opened his eyes, locking them with yours. You have never seen such an intense stare in your life, it was intriguing, magnetic. You could feel yourself blush, but you didn't know if it was because of the embarrassing situation or because you felt intimidated by those brown eyes.

“Uh.. Yeah” He said blinking when he realized he was staring at you for a little too long “I just wasn't expecting that” He chuckled to ease the tension. He had a beautiful smile, like the kind that's just so welcoming and warm, so you couldn't help but join in his laughter.

Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Lottie trying to hold herself together so she wouldn´t burst into fits of laughter at the scenario playing in front of her. You quickly cleared your throat and asked “Are you sure you are okay? Nothing's broken?”

“Nah, that's just his face” A voice with a thick accent said.

The boy rolled his eyes as you peeked over his shoulders. Leaning into the door frame were three other people, boys of apparently the same age, taller than life and equally amused by his hurt friend. You recognized them immediately (mostly thanks to the color haired boy) They were the opening act. They were 5 Seconds of Summer. And you just hit their bassist on the nose.

“Way to make an impression, Cal” Laughed the boy with the long curly hair. Ashton? or was that Luke?

Calum flipped them off as they made their way into the little room and you felt your cheeks get warmer again. The three of them went to say hi to Lottie, having already met her at the last tour, and started a whole new conversation with her.

“Uhmm, I can go get some ice. If you want?” You asked, feeling a little self conscious now that there were more people in the room.

Calum smiled.

“I´m good, but thanks sweetheart” He winked at you “I´m Calum, by the way” He extended his hand for you to shake.

“Y/N” You said with a smile.

“Beautiful” He said, barely even a whisper before his eyes met yours again and you swore your heart just skipped a beat right there and there.

“Hey, Calum!” Lottie greeted him with a hug “We are starting with you today, okay? Go grab a seat” Calum nodded and sat in front of one of the vanities. Lottie came closer to you and whispered “Talk about a meet cute” She teased.

You rolled your eyes and muttered a “Shut up” before you walked away and started to work with one of the other boys.

This was going to be an interesting first day.

For the next hour or so, you found yourself amazed at the fact of how much you had in common with the Aussie band. You bonded over music, fashion and you laughed at the same dumb jokes, and were genuelly surprised at how grounded they all were. They were just as excited as you for the tour, knowing what big of a chance it was and how lucky they were to be here, just like you. In a matter of minutes you were acting like old friends.

From time to time you would look at Calum over the mirror, only to find that he was already staring at you, flashing you a smile every time your eyes met. He wasn’t much of a chatter like his friends, but he still engaged in every conversation, especially if you were part of it.

When their time at “your office” as Lottie calls it, ended, he was the last one to go out. But before he stepped out the door, he gave one last look at you and said “You’ll be watching our set tonight, right?”

You smiled “Wouldn't miss it”

Calum's smile grew until it almost reached his ears, he muttered a last goodbye before closing the door.

“Well, someone has a crush” You turned around and saw Lottie wiggle her eyebrows in a suggestive way, pressing her lips into a teasing fine line. You just rolled your eyes.

“What are you talking about? He was just being friendly”

“Who was being friendly?” A familiar voice said.

You looked behind you and ran towards the slim figure that just opened the door, pulling him into a hug.

“Louis!” You squealed in excitement, circling your arms around his back as he held tighter to you.

Louis was the closest thing you had to an older brother. Growing up as Lottie’s best friend made you an unofficial member of their family and you loved them all as your own. He was always the life of the party, making jokes, teasing you and sometimes reprimanding you if you messed up. You couldn’t count how many times he took you both for a late night snack or let you hang out with him and his friends when you got bored. He also gave great advice, and you trusted him more than anything (besides Lottie, of course) The day that he went away to chase his dreams was one of the most bittersweet moments of your lives, for one part you were happy for him but you would miss him like crazy.

And now, almost five years later, here you were. The three of you, together again like old times but with a more busy schedule. And you wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Y/N/N! It’s so good to see you, love”

“What? No hug for me?” Said Lottie sarcastically, cocking an eyebrow to his older brother.

“Only if you tell me who was being friendly with Y/N” He said as he let you go and her in for a tight bear hug.

“Who’s being friendly with who?” Someone called out from the door.

The three of you turned around to see Harry leaning onto the door. His brows frowned as his eyes scanned the room until they met yours. If he was surprised to see you there then he didn’t show it. After all, you didn’t get to tell him what you were doing here.

“H!” Lottie gasped in delight as she pushed her brother away and went to hug the curly haired man.

Harry hugged her with the same energy, holding her close and muttering a sweet ‘hello’, just like Louis did with you.

“Oi, mate! Have you met Y/N? The new stylist and best friend anyone could have?” Asked Louis as he put his arm around your shoulder, showing you off like a proud big brother.

Harry looked at you and smiled “Yeah, we ran into each other earlier” He shared a knowing smirk with you and you couldn't help but chuckle a little bit.

“Quite literally, I must say”

He was about to say something when the door opened again, you realized no one here bothered to knock first, apparently. Niall, Liam and Zayn entered the room, ready to get themselves ready before the show. Lottie introduced you to each one of them and immediately started working when she noticed how knotted Niall’s hair was.

The conversations started flowing with ease, all of them genuinely curious to get to know you, convinced that any friend of Louis was a friend of them. They were all very sweet and welcoming, and, just like with the members of 5SOS, you bonded rather quickly. All the nerves you once had easily faded away as you felt more comfortable in this space, more convinced than ever that this was where you were meant to be.

“Oi, what about those pretty eyes you saw earlier, Harold?” Liam’s voice filled the room “Seen them again?”

Harry instantly lifted his gaze to watch his friend through the mirror and shot him a deathly glare “Don't know wha you’re talkin ’bout” He stated.

You could’ve swore he looked your way, just for a moment his green eyes met yours through the mirror. It was quick, almost like a reflex. Maybe you were just imagining things.

“Ooh, does Harry have a crush?” Lottie teased while applying some oils to his curls. He just rolled his eyes “Wouldn’t be the first one to catch feelings in this room”

You snapped your head towards your friend, knowing and dreading what she was going to say next.

“Spill” Said Louis, living for the drama.

“Well…” She started, searching for your face in the mirror. But you quickly averted your eyes, suddenly finding Zayn’s hair very interesting “Let’s just say that one of your Australian mates already started making eyes at our Y/N”

The room filled with “oooohs” and “aaawwws” from all of the boys. All except Harry, who was just staring straight at his reflection with a rather serious look.

You laughed and shook your head “Honestly, Lottie. You are just imagining things”

Staring at the mirror one more time, your eyes quickly met Harry’s green orbs, already staring at you from his seat. You shot him a smile and he returned it as the topic of the conversation changed once again.

Time flew without any of you really noticing it. All the boys were done with their hair and make up, ready to move on to the wardrobe department. Lottie tagged along with Louis, wanting to say hi to a few friends she made last year. You wanted to go too, but a quick glance at your phone made you aware of the time and the promise you had made.

“Oh shoot” You breathed, quickly grabbing your phone from the vanity as you rushed through the door.

“What’s the hurry, love?” Asked Harry, amused at your behavior. You didn’t notice that he was the only person left in the room.

“The show’s about to start and I kinda promise someone that I wouldn’t miss it” You smiled “But, now that I think about it, I don’t even know how to get to the side of the stage!”

Harry got up from his chair, wiping his palms onto his black skinny jeans “I could take you there, but only if you promise to stay there for our set as well”

“What? Are you kidding?” You laughed “You really think I wasn’t planning on doing that already?”

His eyes gleamed with joy at your words and you swore you saw a glimpse of his pink tinted cheeks as he nudged his head and asked you to follow him.

You followed Harry though a complicated mess of halls filled with people running around, making sure that everything was already set to start. You had to admit, he really knew how to navigate, not only on stage but backstage as well, you would’ve gotten lost the moment you stepped outside the door if it weren’t for him.

Once you reached the side of the stage, making sure that you stayed way out of the fans point of view, Harry said he had to go back and change.

“‘S not Ashton, is it?” He asked, just before he turned to leave.

“What?”

“The boy who was a crush on you” He stated, eyes locked to the stage, almost like he was trying too hard not to meet yours “‘s not him, right? Cos I’ve seen him look at my sister and I don’t-“

“Nobody has a crush on me!” You laughed as you rolled your eyes, reminding yourself to kill your friend right after the show. “Lottie was just teasing. Besides, I’m here to work, not to look for a relationship”

Harry nodded, seemingly pleased with your answer, making his way back to the maze called ‘backstage’

You watched him walk away with a soft smile on your face. Harry was not like everyone in the media said he was, and you were glad. You didn’t need more drama in your life, no boyfriends nor toxic relationships. You could feel that this was going to be your safe space, and who knows? maybe when the tour finishes you’ll have a new friend to lean on.

The sound of a guitar riff caught you off guard, pulling your attention away from the black background and into the stage. You could hear the fans go absolutely bonkers as the four Australians came into view, smiling as they took their places on stage.

Sharing one understanding look among each other, Ashton banged his drumsticks together, setting the pace for their first song. The crowd goes wild as they recognize the melody immediately, singing and jumping along the words of a song about a girl friendzoning one of the guys.

They sounded incredible. It was hard to imagine that they were still teenagers like yourself, like most of the people in the crowd, actually. The way they moved on stage was erratic, always walking around and messing with each other as they sang and played their instruments like it was nothing. It was easy to tell that they’ve been friends for a long time now and they feel comfortable with each other, having the most fun up there, seizing every moment like it was their last,

You, on the other hand, found yourself enjoying their set a little too much. Since you’ve never gotten the chance to actually listen to most of their songs before tonight, you were quite surprised at how much fun and kinda edgy they were, making you want to dance and jump like the rest of the fans. So you did. You didn’t care about if people around you were watching, you just let yourself go to the rhythm and enjoyed your night. This was the beginning of your new life, what better way to celebrate it than letting all your worries go while your new favorite band played on stage, just mere meters in front of you.

You were so lost in your own little world, completely immersed in the music, that you didn’t notice the looks Calum gave to you while onstage. Everytime he had the chance, his head spinned towards you, watching with joy as you danced along to their songs. Once you caught his eyes staring at you, you smiled at him and stuck your tongue out, mocking him. He just laughed wholeheartedly, bringing one finger to the side of his nose, the same one you punched a few hours ago. You did the same without questioning it, turning that little gesture into your first inside joke.

The guys played a few more songs before their set ended. Calum came to you as soon as they finished their bows.

“Hey!” He said, still pumped with adrenaline.

He was sweaty, very sweaty. But his energy was contagious as he flashed one of his beautiful smiles to you, eyes shining from excitement.

“You came!”

“Told ya I was going to!” You exclaimed “You guys are amazing!”

“You really think so?” Calum looked like a boy on Christmas, genuinely happy that you like how they sound like “Or are you just being nice because you almost broke my nose?”

“Almost! That’s the key word there” You chuckled “But no, I’m being honest. You killed it tonight!”

Calum’s smile almost reached his eyes, making all of his little dimples pop out as he looked at you softly.

“Hey… Uhm.. I need to get back to our dressing room, Wanna come with me?” He asked, suddenly shy.

“Sure!” You said, making his eyes sparkle “Then we can come back and watch the others perform”

Calum furrowed his eyebrows “Oh, you’re staying for that?” He sounded a little bit disappointed.

“Well, yeah? How could I miss it” You chuckled, but stopped once you saw his expression change “Why? You’re not staying for the whole show?”

“Management doesn’t let us stay long after our set”

You muttered a surprised ‘oh’ That wasn’t fair at all! Why couldn’t they enjoy the show like the rest of you? Or even just stay backstage and do nothing but chill until the show was done? You could see Calum was disappointed in that fact too, it must be a bummer for them not to have the full experience.

“But..” He said smiling, bringing his eyes up to meet with yours again “There is an after party at the hotel later tonight, will I see you there as well?”

You nodded “Of course! I’ll be there”

“Yes! Can’t wait!” He jumped in excitement as he took a step forward and started walking towards the dressing rooms. Not before turning back around and saying “See ya there, Y/N” Putting his finger to the side of his nose and smiling when you did the same.

A few minutes later Lottie showed up beside you, knowing the concert was about to start.

“How did the guys do?” She asked.

“Oh, they were amazing! I don´t know why I´ve never heard of them until a few weeks ago!”

She hummed “Yes, they are pretty good. How was Calum?”

You looked at her confused. Was this going to become a thing now? Couldn't you just have a friend without getting involved in some relationship drama? It was frustrating and it will only end up making things awkward for everyone. It has happened before and you were not ready to experience that again.

She seemed to notice your discomfort and immediately changed the topic. Not wanting to upset you. Clearing her throat she said “Uhm.. the boys really like you”

You snapped your head towards her direction.

“They´ve talked about you a little bit, they all say you are really nice and all the yadah yadah I already know” She smiled “Harry was especially pleased with your work. He says could come and stay with me permanently on the team”

You blushed at his compliment, but before you could even say anything you were interrupted by his voice.

“Straight off the plane to a new hotel..”

The fans go wild. Quite feral, you might add. But you couldn't blame them, not even a little bit. The five boys walking down the runway was truly a sight to behold.

You felt the goosebumps run around your body as the energy grew into something quite impossible to understand. This was it. This was the feeling everyone's been talking about, and now it was your turn to experience it every night.

As the music flew through the stadium. All five of them took over the stage like it was their home, and in some way, it was. They practically grew up there, being in the spotlight since a very young age and stealing the hearts of millions around the world. They were as professionals as they were goofy, always finding an excuse to have fun and tease each other in the middle of the songs and with the public, creating an atmosphere of pure bliss wherever they went on that huge structure in the middle of the stadium.

With every song they sang, Lottie grabbed your arm and started dancing and jumping like it's the first time she heard their music and you did the same, getting completely lost in the feeling, so much so that you didn't even notice how much time had passed and just before you know it, the concert was getting to an end.

When the last song came through, the guys were scattered around the stage, running around as they took in everything they could from this experience. At some point, Harry stood right in front of you, just like Calum did a few hours ago, and while he sang his heart out, his eyes connected with yours. His green eyes sparkled like stars when he met your gaze, only for a second too long before he joined his brothers in the middle of the runway, ready to give one final bow and exit the stage where he came from.

“C´mon!” Said Lottie, pulling you out of your trance “They are going to shower and get ready for the after party. We should get going now, because I am not going to show up there with this outfit!”

You laughed at her and followed her to grab a cab, feeling more than excited for the afterparty.

You walked along the lobby, Lottie right by your side. Both of you clean, fresh and looking hot as hell as you made your way to the venue. To say you were nervous was an understatement, you were downright terrified. This was your first VIP party celebrating, not only your first day, but also the first day of one of the biggest tours of the year.

“Hey,” Lottie calmed you down, placing her little hand on your shoulder. “We did an amazing job today, sweetie. It’s time to celebrate”

You nodded and let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, trying to calm the stomach ache that your nerves created and opening the door of the hotel club.

You immediately got caught up in the dark atmosphere, flashing colored lights flying around the room and reflecting themselves onto the mirrored dance floor. Out of the corner of your eyes you spotted a few people sitting on the bar stools, some were already on the dance floor and others were just sitting on dark booths pulled against the walls, chilling as they watched the party go by. You recognize some of them, but most of them were strangers, elite people that came to celebrate and wish another successful tour for the boys.

The pressure on your chest became tighter. You grabbed Lottie‘s hand and felt some kind of comfort when she squeezed it for a second, at least you weren’t alone.

“LOTTIE!” Someone called from one of the dark booths. You could recognize Zayn’s thick accent anywhere. With one reassuring look, Lottie pulled your hand and guided you through the sea of people flooding the room.

Once you reached the booth it was easier to identify its occupants. Zayn was sitting next to Louis who, at the same time, was beside Ashton and Luke. You all exchanged your hellos as you took a seat next to Lottie.

“What’d think of the show?” Asked Louis, taming a sip of his beer.

The group started rambling on and on about the different parts of the show, their favorite moments and about the craziest fans they managed to see. You spend quite a bit talking and laughing with the guys, slowly getting more comfortable being there. It’s not like you didn’t enjoy parties at all, on the contrary, you loved them. The problem was that this was new territory, pleasure mixing with your responsibilities and you didn’t want to fuck this up. The sheer thought of that possibility made you feel ill again and you wanted nothing more than to breathe a little air into your lungs before you passed out from overthinking too much.

Scanning the room you spotted a glass door that led to some sort of balcony, you cheered internally “I’ll be right back” You whispered to Lottie, who was having a nice chat with Luke about his bone structure. She looked at you, worried. You smiled at her “I’m just going to get some air, keep talking. I won’t take long”

You almost sprinted to the door, heart racing at the thought of a moment alone to gather yourself. Once the cool air of the night grazed your skin, you felt like you could finally breathe properly. You always felt more like yourself when nighttime arrived, it was complicated to explain but it seemed like the stars could understand you better than anyone. They were your comfort and your confidants, because no matter what, you knew they wouldn't ever leave you alone.

“‘S nice to know ‘m not the only one who needed a break” You heard a familiar voice say next to you.

Harry was standing next to railing, green eyes fixed on you as you took a step closer.

“You’re not having fun?” You asked, resting your elbows on the cold metal of the balcony.

“Parties are all the same after a while,” He said absentmindedly “‘m just really tired”

“Well, that’s understandable. After the night you had? If I were you I would be sleeping until I turned 40!”

Harry laughed and shook his head at your comment “How’s your bum?”

“My what now?”

“Your ass” He said pointing at your backside “From the fall?”

“Oh! It’s fine, just a little bruised up. Which is surprising since I expected a lot worse from being run over by a six foot man”

He smiled “‘m sorry, love. If it makes you feel better I got my ass handed to me by a six foot five man right after that”

“Yeah, that does make me feel better” You chuckled, looking at the sky again “Still can’t believe I’m here”

Harry came closer to you, his arm barely inches from yours. You didn’t notice as he studied your face carefully, almost like he was trying to remember every detail “‘s like a dream, isn’t it?”

“It truly is. I-“ You turned your face to him, only to find his way closer than you remember “Is everything alright, Harry?”

He hummed, distancing himself from you as he laid his back to the railing “Just thinking”

“About?”

“That I might actually enjoy the parties if you’re around”

You were about to return the compliment when you heard the glass door open with a ferocious amount of force.

“Y/N!” Lottie yelled from the insides of the party “Get your little perky arse in here! They’re playing our song!”

You knew better than to say no to that. So you laughed as you made your way back inside, but not before saying bye to Harry.

“I’ll come and find you soon” He said with a dashing smile.

“As long as you don’t throw me to the ground, then that’s okay”

You grabbed Lottie’s hand and she pulled you over to the dance floor, not wasting any time before she started moving along to the song blasting from the stereos, you joined her almost instantly.

At that moment, you didn’t care who saw. You were having the time of your life dancing with your best friend in a party celebrating your new life. Your new beginning. Yes, you were scared. But why be scared now? Why don’t just enjoy the moment? Life’s too short to be moping around hypotheticals. Right now, you wanted to dance.

And you did, for five more songs you let all your worries go down the drain. Tonight you were living the dream and you silently promised yourself to cherish every moment like it’s the last one, no time for worries nor fears. Just fun.

“Ugh! I need a wee!” Lottie called over the music.

“I’m gonna grab some water!” You said to her before each of you made your way to your own destinations.

Once you reached the bar, you tried and failed to get the bartender’s attention. Them being to worried about the other clients waiting for a line of shots at the other side of the bar.

Wanting to rest your feet for a while, you decided to sit up on one of the tall stools they had, trying to catch your breath after that intense dance workout you just had. Your eyes began to wander across the room again out of curiosity, you wanted to know what your friends were up to at the moment.

You quickly found Liam and Niall on the dance floor, trying to copy some choreography they probably saw online and failing miserably while doing so. Louis, Zayn and Ashton were still at the booth, they were laughing hard at something that Josh had said, making Louis spill his drink onto the table. You scanned the room a little bit more, pretending like you were in a game of ‘Where’s Waldo?’ Without looking for anyone in particular. That’s when your eyes met Calum’s.

He was sitting at the other end of the bar, eyes already fixed at you when you met them. When he noticed you were staring, he quickly shot you a smile and brought his finger to the side of his nose, remembering your secret greeting from earlier. You smiled back and did the same, beckoning him to come talk to you.

He was by your side in a second

“Hey you!” He said excitedly “Was wondering where you went”

“I was just dancing with Lottie a few minutes ago” You pointed out the dance floor.

“Oh I know, hard to keep the eyes from ya” He smiled “Looks like karaoke is not your only talent”

“Oh shut up!” You laughed as you playfully punched him in the arm “I could still break your nose, you know?”

“I’m completely aware, darling. Wouldn’t mind it if you did, though”

You rolled your eyes at him “Are you having fun?”

“I am now”

You laughed again and Calum swore he had never listened to such a beautiful sound before. His brown eyes met yours again, trying to communicate everything you needed to know with just one gaze, just one moment. He was never a man of many words, but he hoped that this would be enough.

“So..” You said, trying not to get lost in his stare but failing miserably as you felt how his dark eyes took you in “What’ve you been doing, if you weren’t having fun?”

Calum smiled and shook his head “Trying to get Michael and Luke out of trouble-“

“CALUM” A voice was heard from across the room, probably Luke’s

“Like I said…” He pointed behind you at the two young men on the dance floor next to Liam and Niall, trying to balance some beer bottles onto Niall’s quiff “Cal! Come here!”

Calum sighed “I better go see what they’re doing”

“Make sure they don’t hurt themselves, I certainly don’t want to deal with covering them with make up tomorrow if they end up cutting their faces off” You joked.

“I’ll take that into account” He chuckled “I’ll find you later, Y/N” Calum said, turning around to their friends.

After a while, you decided to go over the booth and hang out with Louis, not wanting to be alone on a stool bar any longer.

“I can see you’re having fun, aren’t ya, love?” He said, putting his arm around your shoulder in a brotherly kind of way.

“I am, in fact. Thank you for asking”

“Been a bit flirty from what I can see as well, haven’t ya?”

You looked at him. He had a smug smile on his face, one brow raising teasingly as he waited for your answer. What did he mean by that?

“Uhm.. what? I haven’t been flirting with anyone” You state, confused by his question.

“Yeah? Do they know that?” Louis said, pointing behind you.

You turned your head to where he was pointing and you could see Calum and Harry, both coming from different sides of the room each one with two drinks in their hands, approaching the booth. Both of their eyes were fixed on you as they walked closer and closer, until they stopped completely in front of you.

It seemed like only then did they acknowledge each other, as they comically turned their heads to their side, looked down at each other’s drinks and then lifted their gaze to meet again face to face, mirroring each other’s movements and expressions.

“Guess you got a handful there, love” Louis whispered in your ear.

Oh, boy.

Part 2

216 notes · View notes

harrysgloves · 5 years ago

Text

Let Your Hair Down (chapter x)

Get caught up with the Let Your Hair Down Masterlist!

word count: 1,629

story summary: Harry gets more than he bargains for when he falls not only for you but your little girl as well.

chapter summary: Sarah helps you get ready for your date!

warnings: Language.. >.> sorry

a/n: I love Sarah so much so... I had to of course put her in your getting ready chapter. She’s the cutest in this story. I love her so much! Hope you guys are looking forward to all the upcoming fluff... followed closely by drama! hehehehee :D xx

>>><<<

It was Saturday night and you were finally getting ready for your date with Harry. Sarah was sitting on your bathroom counter with the world's biggest shit-eating grin on her face as you fussed over your hair. You really would have slapped the look off her face if it wasn't for the fact you were freaking the fuck out. You hadn't been on a first date in almost 6 years. You weren't even sure what people did on dates anymore.

Your hands shook from nerves, causing you to burn yourself on the curling iron. You shrieked dropping it into the sink, your finger going to your mouth to stop the throbbing pain. Sarah jumped off the sink to take your hand, looking at it, before saying you'd be fine.

"God, I'm so nervous." You mumbled, picking back up the wand of Satan and trying to not burn yourself this time as you curled the piece of hair that you had previously tried to do.

"Well, stop it." Sarah perched herself back up on the sink, grabbing her glass of wine, and taking a long drink from it. "You're gonna do fine. Obviously, he likes you, been going after you for a year now."

Your eyes widened as you looked towards Sarah who simply shrugged. What the hell was she talking about? You had only known about his little crush on you for a few months before you started hanging out and you didn't even think it was a serious crush until he started randomly showing up all the time even after getting you in bed.

"He wasn't chasing me that long." Your eyebrows pulled together as you tried to think back. You were so sad last year it mostly all seemed like a blur to you.

"Uh yeah, he did." She sighed, sitting her cup on the counter. She turned her body more towards you as she helped fix some of your curls falling around your face.

"You were just too depressed over the divorce to notice it and too stuck up Ryan's cheating ass to realize Harry was a jealous little jellybean every time you two hung out with all of us." Her words hit you like a tidal wave, had you really missed all those signs from him? It was definitely possible given how utterly crushed you were for the year following the divorce. It was only the last few months that you really started to feel like yourself again.

"I'm an idiot." You huffed out, hands going to your face as you had the realization of everything hitting you all at once. Harry was into you and not just for sex, like actually into you.

"Yeah you are but you're a sexy idiot tonight." Sarah smiled as you gave out a pathetic laugh.

"God," You stomped your foot, feeling so absolutely dumb. "I thought he was going to bolt after we had sex and come to find out that's why he was so weird about it beforehand."

Sarah gasped at your confession, jumping off the counter, her hand clasped over her mouth as she pushed your shoulder.

"You dirty slut!" She yelled through her hand, her voice so loud you were sure Thea would hear her and wake up. You desperately shh-ed her, telling her to keep her voice down.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She questioned, quickly turning from shocked to annoyed at the fact you hadn't shared the details with her.

"Cause," You sighed as you leaned your back against the counter, head tilted towards the ceiling to avoid her stare. "I didn't want to admit it happened. What if he never talked to me again after that? It would have made shit weird so I just didn't want to bring it up. Just in case."

"Wow," She said as she mimicked your position. Her arms crossing over her chest. "Bet he almost shit himself from nerves. He told Mitch he'd probably get struck by lightning before you ever agreed to get in bed with him."

You laughed shaking your head. Of course, they had all discussed this, they wouldn't be your overbearing friend group if they didn't. You rolled your eyes before turning back towards the mirror and adjusting the loose deep neck black camisole you had on back into your high waisted jeans. You had no idea where you were going but Harry told you to not dress up too much so you assumed somewhere where there wouldn't be a lot of attention on you two.

"Stop it." Sarah slapped your hands away from your constant fiddling of your outfit and readjusted your tank top back into place. "You look gorgeous so stop worrying."

"Thanks." You smiled but the hint of nerves you had still showed through. You had no idea if he'd still like you after tonight. This seemed so different from the other times you hung out together, way more official.

The knock at your door stopped your breath as you turned to Sarah, panic filling your wide eyes. She gripped both shoulders and shook you lightly.

"Get a hold of yourself girl. You're a bad bitch. Go get him." She said, turning you and slapping your ass. Making you jump and turn around to glare at her.

"Oh so if Harry does it it's fine but I do it and I get the look." Her eyebrows raised accusingly, making your face heat, and her snicker.

"Wait!" She said, stopping you in your bedroom. "You got on nice lingerie right?"

"Oh my God, Sarah!" You pushed her shoulder, causing her to laugh again.

"Who am I kidding? A hoe like you? You're probably decked to the nines." She walked out of your room and you followed closely behind her, too nervous to tell her off.

You stood beside her, right in front of your door as another knock came from outside. Your heart slammed across your chest. Nope, no way, you couldn't do this. You started to turn around but Sarah caught your wrist and basically dragged you to the door. Pushing you slightly from behind to open it.

When you did your heart could have exploded. There stood Harry, gorgeous as ever. He wore the yellow vest with blue polka dots on it that you absolutely adored him in. It laid overtop a white-collar shirt with light grey stripes. But what really finished the look for you was his wide smile as he stood there staring at you. A single sunflower in his hand.

"Look gorgeous, love." A bright smile across your face as he handed you your flower.

"Thanks, H." The smile on your face not fading as you stood taking him all in. Both of you in some sort of trance, honestly you could just spend all night looking at him but the sound of Sarah loud Aweeeee from behind you made you roll your eyes.

You turned around widening your eyes, trying to telepathically tell your friend you would murder her if she didn't shut up. She of course just smiled wider as she walked out of the kitchen with another glass of wine and plopped down on your couch.

"Thanks for babysitting Sarah." Harry said from behind you, trying to be nice but Sarah was in the mood to tease you both.

"Oh, I wouldn't miss this for the world." She quipped back, smug smile, basking in all her rightness of you two hooking up. You wanted to deck her.

You turn back to the front door and grabbed your cardigan off your coat rack. Ushering Harry out the door.

"Be back later tonight." Rushing out all the words to try and avoid any embarrassment.

"You better not set foot in this apartment until tomorrow morning!" She yelled after you. "I expect a walk of shame Y/N!"

You quickly shut the front door, resting your back against it as you looked up to Harry who finally broke and started laughing. You sighed pushing him out of the way and starting down the stairs.

"I take it you told her." He chuckled, hand filled with rings reaching down to intertwine with yours.

"Regret telling her. Now she gets to do the stupid told you so dance. She really enjoys that too much." You huffed as you both made your way out towards the street. You still had no idea where you were going but when you saw the very expensive-looking car sitting in front of your building you stopped.

"Wat?" He asked, turning back around to you.

"Is that yours?" You stepped forward to get a good look at the car that probably cost more than you'd make in your entire lifetime.

"Uh, yeh." He said but it sounded more like a question than a statement. You turned to him eyes filled with shock.

"They let you drive in America?" He immediately rolled his eyes at your teasing, opening the door for you and motioning for you to get in.

"I'm serious Harry. You know we drive on the right side of the road here, right?" You asked before stepping into the car and him shutting the door.

He quickly walked around to his side and got it. Looking over to you, waiting to see if you were done picking on him yet.

"You better not wreck us cause you forget which side of the road to drive on." You smiled at him. He shook his head, hiding his smile and leaned over the center console to kiss you.

"Not my fault bloody American's do everything backwards. First, you refuse to use the metric system and now you drive on the right side of the road." He started his car, glancing back over at you with a smile.

"But don't worry. I'll keep you safe."

#Harry Styles #Harry #Harry Styles x Reader #Harry Styles x You #Harry Styles x Y/N #harry styles fanfic #Harry Styles Fanfiction #Fanfic #Fanfiction #writing #mine #LYHD

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sunflowerseraph · 4 years ago

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HEEHEE! hits u back with the character game uhh thor or bucky :33

!!! I'll do... BOTH >:D ! It'll be long tho so I'm putting em under cuts :}

Here's the ask game btw!

Thor!

How I feel about this character: OH he's such a bi disaster. But he's trying his best. Textbook himbo. Crushed under the weight of his father's expectations of him alot of the time. Probably struggles with self worth nowadays too,with the battles and family he's lost! Also he's very much like those memes abt dudes/dads where they'll mention some horrible childhood trauma and then have some funny song playing in their head like nothin even happened.! I feel like he cares very deeply for the friendships he's made and the found family he's gained with the warriors three [rip] and the avengers! Overall? Kind himbo who respects women and forgets how smart he is sometimes.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: honestly this is such a hard question cause im sure if u presented me with like,good reasons for most people then I'd be on board. But so far one of my Main ships for Thor rn is Bruce and Thor <3 GammaHammer makes me happy :} I've seen thor n valkyrie stuff too which is like aight they're all bi4bi t4t prolly,but honestly a polycule or some shit w Bruce Val and thor would be Inch resting :} I'm not sure tho! Oh and Jane Foster I Guess but she's not rlly up there.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: OH absolutely thor and loki ! Brothers 🤍 I rewatch the thor movies the other day and seeing them fight together and hang out as kids made me so 🥺❗ yknow? I also think Thor n Darcy are a fun pair! Thor and the warriors three make me :} as well bc they're all buddies! That's his little family yknow!! Or. Was.

My unpopular opinion about this character: listen i know I just called him a himbo but he's smarter than people give him credit for I think. But also he's pretty cocky at times with his fighting ability and I feel like that's his greatest downfall. He tends to sorta think he can do everything on his own,and he doesn't rely on others until he really needs to and it ends up w him or his companions hurt :(

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.: ough I wish we could've gotten more time to see him experiencing earth stuff! In other like shows n such (like one of the animated series) its funny to see him interacting with mortals and I feel like we don't get that enough. Like sure we got the "another!" Scene and if you watched the YouTube mocumentary he obviously doesn't understand money or jobs. But it's still funny and I'd like to see him go "I don't understand what that means :D" like an optimistic puppy yknow :]

Uhmm yeh that's for thor! OK Bucky time 🤍

Bucky-

How I feel about this character: I feel like. They should do more w him in the mcu! But that's just bc im a kinnie ig but it makes me sad that he's just viewed as Steve's Sidekick when he's got a personality and works so well as Sam's partner in TFAWTS! I like the representation he can bring to the table though,regarding disability (I mean even though. He's an enhanced person but yknow.) And mental health! He also shows that your past doesn't need to define you and you CAN be free and work past old mistakes.! I feel like he's a little out of touch sometimes bc of the time shifts and mental stuff goin on,but I'm not saying it's a bad thing,its just compelling to meeee

All the people I ship romantically with this character: I USED to ship stevebucky I won't lie,but I much rather prefer SamBucky bc its just better LMAO Sam is much cooler than Steve in many regards and to me Sam is a better influence on Buckys life ig? Like. Idk how to explain it well enough but their banter is better and they compliment eachother rather than one of them taking the reigns all the time. I just like the level playing field where it still feels like Bucky can be a Sidekick but his partner at the same time rather than Just Bucky Barnes. Idk if that makes sense but !

My non-romantic OTP for this character: honestly I'm not sure? I feel like if they could both get over association's with like...almost killing eachother Bucky and Nat could be friends :] both were molded to be Weapons and have to deal with their traumas and mental health. Obviously I also wish Steve would've stuck around bc I hate that he like.LEFT his best friend and new family,but whatever.

My unpopular opinion about this character: I think bucky is sort of a dork actually. Alot of people make him very stoic and Winter Soldiery but that's. Not all he is! He's a complex person who's been used and weaponized and its annoying whenever people try to say he's a stoic person or whatever. Like no bro ur thinking abt the winter soldier. Ofc the winter solider was/is part of him and that doesn't just shut off but I think it's bs to boil him down to Killing Machine Assasinator Ooo Scary! When he was also a soldier during. Fucking Ww2! He was also like shown to be a bit of a dorky guy who liked to dance and be with chick's n shit lmao,like he mustve been a charmer. And even after,like during tfatws he's shown to still have bits of that personality. He messes around with Sam's nephews and offers help without prompting and just overall wants to live a more peaceful life while still managing to be social and humorous. ("How old are you anyways?" "106.") Anyways I think what I'm saying is ppl tend to forget to split him and tws.!

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.: this is sort of similar to the Thor thing but discovering new age shit! Like I wanna see him be bad at tech or be confused by new slang. Also wanna see him like, get annoyed at how the tech is where he's at vs. The wakandan tech. That shit probably blew his socks off and then he had to go hang w Americans and went :(?? How do i use a flip phone. The beads were so convenient in Wakanda HFNEBDB. I also wish we could've actually seen how bucky Healed in Wakanda?? Like however he was helped yknow? I'm sure they (mcu) can't like do much besides say he was Magically Cured Of Mental Illness so I guess I'm glad they left it up to whatever but. Still 😔

Anyways uhm yeah! Sorry this is so long sjdjf it prolly doesn't make much sense but 👍❤

#thank u for ur ask ricky :}#now i wanna take a nap before work bc ive been up since 6 :(#ask game.answered #thor #bucky barnes #mcu #marvel #ill answer the other ones soon ooo im just sleepy rn

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syms-things-5 · 5 years ago

Text

Clear The Area - Chapter Fourteen

Previous Chapter HERE

Warnings: Language, NSFW Language

Tags: @jennmurawski13 @kelbabyblue

Note: Apologies, this is a repost from yesterday for reasons I won’t go into now. i hope you enjoy this chapter!

Chapter Fourteen

Sarah jostled with the mail as she entered their building, trying hard not to knock over the newest fresh plant currently adorning the entrance. They usually took it in turns to handle the post and whatever parcels the Supervisor had signed for that day but she was starting to feel a little short-changed as Shanna had consistently more post coming her way these days. Sarah realised she needed to get out more. Carting everything up the stairs was starting to become its own workout. Today’s treasures involved two Nasty Gal packages, a package from Pottery Barn, a box from Amazon, and what appeared to be a free sample of a Louis Vuitton fragrance. Sarah might just keep that last one to herself.

Jocelyn had sent another care package of sorts her way but it only served to remind Sarah that she had not called her folks in over a week. Ever since the accident, Jocelyn had been so consumed with worry that she had taken to sending Sarah articles ripped form magazines and gift cards for relaxation therapies. Despite Sarah’s many protests to the contrary, Jocelyn was sure Sarah was struggling with some form of undiagnosed PTSD. She’d read about it in a magazine. “If affects upwards of half a million American every year, honey.”

After successfully dodging the neighbour’s schnauzer, she eventually reached their floor and was just about to turn her key in the lock when the door swung wide open. Before she had time to react, she was brought face to face with a stressed-out Shanna, hair dripping wet from a shower. Not her favourite Shanna it had to be said. Not even in the Top Ten.

She grabbed Sarah by both shoulders. “I don’t know what I’m going to wear, Sarah! I’ve got less than an hour!”

“And hello to you, too!” Sarah smiled broadly, almost comically so, before Shanna lowered her head in embarrassment and moved out of the way so Sarah could physically get into her own home. She held the packages up. “Maybe there is something in here?”

Shanna shook her head. “No, they’re more summery. More formal.” She’d started fluttering around Sarah in a panic. “Do you still have that leather midi skirt? Do you think I could fit into it?”

“Uhh yeh it’s in the back of my closet somewhere.” she remembered. “Might be a bit warm, though? What are you gonna wear with it?”

“Well it’s a punky kind of bar, think it has live music and stuff so I thought maybe that Rolling Stones t-shirt and the maroon boots? Keep my hair down and casual?”

“So basically all of my clothes?” Sarah retorted. Shanna pressed her hands together in prayer and gave her the best pitiful smile she could manage, one she knew Sarah couldn’t resist. Shanna seemed to genuinely like this guy and if this guy was as charming and as smart as she told her he was, Sarah was sure she would like him, too. Hell, he’d be best friends with Scott and Chris in no time so long as he enjoyed football, Sam Adams, and didn’t put points on Shanna’s licence.

“Give me five minutes and I’ll see what I can pull together. Do you wanna borrow that heart necklace of mine? If you’re wearing your hair down, it’s probably best you avoid wearing earrings unless you want me to cut you out of them again.” Sarah shouted as she walked into her room unaware that Shanna had followed her closely behind.

“Oh god I hadn’t even thought that far. You know what, I might just cancel. This is just too much right now and I’m not even sure if he really likes me as anything more than a friend.” She feigned a dramatic flop onto Sarah’s bed, one arm landing across her forehead. Sarah delved through her closet to locate the desired items. If Shanna was threatening to cancel the date already, it must be serious.

“How many of you are going to this club?” Sarah asked, emerging from the closet doorway.

“Don’t know. Think three or four from my department and another couple from his?” she responded, hopelessness evident in her voice. Shanna never did well with vagueness where guys were concerned; everything had to be black and white with her.

“Come on, you’ve still got time.” Sarah encouraged as she carried some clothes and a couple of pairs of boots towards the bed. “Dry your hair and we’ll figure this out, OK?”

“Have I told you how much I love you lately?” Shanna pouted and Sarah tried to shrug off the pit growing in her stomach from her words. Shanna used every ounce of energy she could muster to get up and drag herself back into the bathroom leaving Sarah shaking her head.

It was only a rare occasion when Shanna took less time getting ready in the bathroom. Sarah had fond memories of shouting through the door back when they were at college and deciding to move in together required a complete 180 degree shift in her expectations. Still, in less than half an hour, here she emerged fully dressed, primer and foundation applied, and hair dried accordingly. It was a miracle of epic proportions and if she hadn’t shoved some false eyelashes into Sarah’s hand, Sarah would have snapped a photograph to send to the family as evidence that their little girl was growing up.

Thanks to her professional, steady hand, Sarah was always the eyelash-fixer among their group. While fixing a couple of lashes to the corners of her eyes, Sarah’s phone buzzed. It buzzed a couple more times in quick succession and she would have managed to ignore it had it not been for Shanna’a roving eye.

“Looks like someone wants you.” she murmured, trying her hardest not to move as Sarah held the glued lash in place with some tweezers.

“It’ll just be Audrey probably.” Sarah responded in no rush to check for herself, keeping a firm hold on what she was doing.

Shanna tried glancing to her side one more time to catch who it was but couldn’t quite make it out. It buzzed again. “I’d hate for you to miss out on a date with Greg on account of helping piece my pathetic love life together. Oooh maybe we could double-date!”

Shanna’s exclaim nearly caused Sarah to lose her grip on the tweezers but a sharp intake of breath convinced Shanna to give up the inquisition. “Sorry. Sorry.” she held her hands up as an apology before feeling Sarah’s hands relax as she moved across to the other eye.

Sarah was pleased to see Shanna eventually leave their apartment. Not because she wanted the peace particularly but just because it was nice to see her get excited over a guy that wasn’t Ben. She looked gorgeous, too. Sarah was quite proud of her work. If it wasn’t to be a proper date, it definitely would be after tonight. Robbie would be an absolute fool to miss out.

It was only when she slumped dow onto the couch and spent the next hour or so flicking through television channels that she remembered her phone had buzzed earlier on. She reluctantly peeled herself off the sofa and retrieved it from where it had originally landed on her bedside table. Honestly, it was like Shanna had taught her nothing.

From just two messages, Chris had attempted some mild flirtation with her before asking her if she knew what in God’s Name Penhaligon’s was.

Sarah 8.19pm: Perfume I think. Pretty old school brand. Why?

Chris 8.23pm: Mom wants it for her birthday. Never heard of it before. Scott thought it might be some kind of scarf??

She googled the name to make sure. Last thing she wanted was to end up ruining Lisa’s birthday celebrations with a present she absolutely did not want. Her birthday was something she took with increasing seriousness as each year passed by and her children and grandchildren grew older in front of her eyes. There was always a party of sorts, a massive cake, perhaps a theme, and a “suggestion list” for possible gifts. Well, they say “suggestion” but rarely did anyone dare deviate from “the list”. Sarah hadn’t yet considered buying a present but if Chris was already looking, she would no doubt need to catch up.

Sarah 8.34pm: Yep, pretty certain it’s a perfume. Pretty pricey. Good shout.

Sarah started scanning through her phone as another couple of messages caught her eye, some she had accidentally missed from earlier in the day. One from Audrey. One from Greg that she was not expecting.

Greg 7.02pm: Great news! 29th is set up. All you need to do is say the word! Don’t know how long I can hold the spot open so let me know as soon as you can. Have a great evening x

It took her a moment to register what he was talking about.

Chris 8.37pm: Cool THX What are you wearing??

Sarah stared down at the phone. She felt light-headed. There was far too much going on for this time of the day. She wiped at her forehead with her sweater sleeve and took a deep breath.

Sarah 8.41pm: You wouldn’t be interested lol

Chris 8.42pm: try me..........

He had a surprising habit these days of cheering her up.

Sarah 8.46pm: Nah I look a mess. Get out while you can.

Her phone started ringing almost as soon as she’d pressed ‘send’, Chris’ name flashing on her screen. She contemplated not answering now that her mood had taken a turn but she knew he would work out something was wrong and immediately dive over.

“Hey,” she answered, trying for a jovial tone but coming up just south of delirious.

“Hey you,” he smiled through the phone, happy to hear her voice. “In all the years I have known you, Bernette, not once would I describe you as looking like a mess.”

She laughed down the line. She made the right decision.

“...you are far too cute to ever be a mess. Do you know that? Like, I can already picture you with your sweats on, your hair tied up, soft skin...” he trailed off with a low sigh that she was sure was filthier than he intended it to be. “Man, that really does something to me.”

“You really know how to charm a girl. Have you figured this Penhaligon’s thing out yet? Was I right?”

“Don’t change the subject.”

She laughed again. “Sorry. Sorry. I’m not great with flirting over the phone. You should know that by now.”

“Then do it with me in person.” he proposed as if it was the easiest solution in the world. As if she wasn’t going to be distracted with thoughts of work and studies enough to not focus on him entirely. And he didn’t deserve to be second best.

It would have been all too easy to allow him to come over. Forget about overthinking things again. There truly was no one better at making her feel good about herself these days. Like, honest, through-the-bone good about herself, whatever that entailed. Goosebumps raised on her skin at the thought.

“I’m pretty whacked to be honest and...”

“What’s going on? Are you feeling alright?” he asked, concern evident in his tone. Whatever he had been pottering about with in the background had stopped all of a sudden.

“Yes! Yeh, I’m fine. Just...I dunno, boring. Plus, it’s Friday night! You should be out with the guys or whatever. Shan said Scott is having issues with Zach again. Is he OK?”

He laughed at her second lame attempt to deflect. He knew something was going on and he knew she knew he wouldn’t give up easily.

“Is Shanna there?” he asked.

“No, she went out with some friends.”

“So why don’t you ask me to come over and I’ll make you feel better than fine?”

She was lucky she was sat down or that her legs were crossed underneath her as she lounged on the couch, her back against the arm rest. His tone was causing her to feel things she shouldn’t be focussing on. What must it feel like to always be confident of your effect on people?

“Do you wanna come over?” she asked, treading lightly, not entirely anxious should he decline.

“I’ll be there in twenty.” He ended the call almost as abruptly as he had dialled it.

She remained where she sat for a moment, Greg’s text message still lighting up her screen. She wasn’t expecting for things to suddenly be so easy for her and it was strange how opening herself up to more possibilities could cause her to feel so immobile.

She would need to move at some point and as a helpless and as confused as she now felt, she knew it would look far too obvious to Chris if she bid to make herself up. She also didn’t really have the energy to do so. Lord, Chris really should have taken the out when he had the chance.

“Have I just walked into a teenage girl’s bedroom?” Chris asked, taking a look around as he entered the apartment not long afterwards. He clearly found the scene amusing although Sarah couldn’t under stand why. It was partly Shanna’s home after all. He should be used to girly mess. “What’s going on?”

“Shan has a date. I was helping her to get ready.” Sarah replied, humourously holding up the hairdryer like a trophy before dumping it back in her bedroom. “Sort of, actually. She doesn’t quite know if it’s a date date or a friend date.”

“I was told those didn’t exist.” Chris smirked, reaching for a bottle of water from her fridge.

“Well, she’s dressed up for one. Looks gorgeous.”

“I think you look gorgeous.”

She rolled her eyes at him. “Chris, you don’t need to make any more effort, OK? You’re already in the apartment.”

“I think it bears repeating is all.”

He swallowed half the bottle of water before fixing her with a semi-quizzical stare. He tried to figure out what was going on as he watched her potter around the kitchen table, swiping something away into a cupboard, phone grasped in her hand. “What’s going on? You sounded weird on the phone and now you look like it as well.”

“Nothing’s wrong.” she answered far too quickly and tried to shrug it off but his body language told her he wasn’t buying it. She wasn’t sure what was bothering her more in this moment; him knowing her too well, or that he knew he knew her too well.

“OK, alright, well, it’s Friday night and I’m happy just hanging out and doing whatever but you can also talk to me as well. I’m not a monster.”

“It was her turn to look back at him, unsure of her next move or indeed his. she wondered if he was very likely regretting his decision to meet her now when twenty minutes in the opposite direction would take him to one of his favourite downtown dive bars. Instead, he rested against the side of the kitchen doorway, arms folded, a softness still present in his facial expressions. He seemed hesitant of what to say and she didn’t like the slight awkward air surrounding them. She didn’t want to venture into work-territory either.

“Do you want me to go, Sarah?”

She looked back up at him after a short spell spent staring down at her feet. “No. I don’t want you to leave. I’m just...there’s something...” she paused to re-evaluate her words. “You know what, it’s find. It’s nothing major. Of course I’m glad you’re here now.”

He pushed himself off from the counter and moved towards her, accepting of the greeting smile now covering her face, the bottle of water still in his grip. “Cool. Shall I follow your lead then, or...?”

“Do you wanna watch a movie or something?” she suggested, more casually than he would have liked. She didn’t know what to say to him now that all of her brain space was taken up with possibilities and wanting to call Audrey with the news. Chris hadn’t factored in watching a film but she seemed like she wanted a little peace and quiet and he had pretty much dived into the apartment as soon as she gave him the green light, eager as he was to see her without threat of Shanna walking in at any point.

“Movie sounds good.” He bobbed his head in agreement, content in their surroundings for now.

At some point towards the end of Searching, Chris quietly excused himself to go to the bathroom. Realising something was about to happen and not wanting to have to explain it to him after he returned, Sarah put the film on pause and headed into the kitchen to make a cup of tea. She had held him at an arm’s length for most of the night, the couch seeming longer somehow, but was now feeling a slight chill despite the thick sweater reaching midway down her thighs. He would no doubt have been cosy to snuggle up to but she was still pondering Greg’s message and couldn’t concentrate on much else.

Her demeanour hadn’t gone unnoticed by Chris. A couple of times he caught the glare from her phone screen illuminating her face from below and wondered who had gotten her attention this evening. He stopped himself from making an obvious joke and was disappointed that she hadn’t noticed him glance across at her several times during the movie. He wasn’t much interested in watching it. Telling the truth, he’d seen it via a DVD screener Matt had sent him months earlier but she’d mentioned she was looking forward to watching it and in all honesty, he had figured they would curl up together and he would have still gotten something out of it.

“Chris? Do you want a cup of tea?” she hollered from the kitchen doorway. No response for what seemed to be a long, long minute. She switched the kettle off and began pouring him one anyway. She could always drink two if he didn’t want it.

“Chris?” she shouted again.

She walked into the lounge to place the cups down and clocked the bathroom door ajar and seemingly empty. Maybe he left without telling her. In all fairness, she wouldn’t have been surprised or annoyed. She’d barely given him a moment of attention for the last two hours.

She wandered slowly down the hallway first passing Shanna’s bedroom before reaching her own and finding him stretched out across the bottom of her bed. She giggled and leaned on the side of the doorway. He looked rather comfortable. A little too comfortable. Maybe he wanted some company?

“What are you up to, Evans?”

He tilted his head up to find her standing there. “I was wondering how long it would take for you to notice I was gone.” He leaned up further and rested on one arm to fully take sight of her. His eyes appeared a little dopey, a thing that always seemed to give away his nefarious intentions. From the angle he was now lying in, the size of his bicep looked ridiculous. It could not have been an accidental move and she’d be lying if she said it wasn’t working for her.

“Are you bored? You can absolutely go if you have a better offer, I promise I won’t mind.” she offered by way of an apology but he stayed looking at her, not moving or responding to her offer. Being caught under his glare like this was unnerving to say the least. His hair looked a little messy from where he had been lying down yet he still made zero effort to move at all.

“I’m not bored.” He finally spoke, sincerity lacing his voice. “Are you? You seem distracted tonight.”

She didn’t know how to respond except to say he was right and to apologise again. She hadn’t figured out what to say to Greg yet so explaining her thought process to Chris wasn’t going to get her very far. It was times like this, when he was looking at her like that, that she wished she had the confidence to try and shut him up the old-fashioned way.

“Come here...” It was barely a whisper and she would have doubted he had spoken at all if it wasn’t for the hand he was now holding out towards her. He didn’t blink once.

She couldn’t refuse him and moved slowly to stand in the middle of his now-parted legs hanging off the end of the bed as he sat up. She watched as he closed his eyes when he felt her fingers smooth through his hair. There was something so calming about her touch, the deliberate graze of her nails sending little shocks down his spine. He wasn’t normally fussed by a woman playing with his hair even if occasionally he liked it when they pulled on it but something about her slow, tender touch was unlike anything he had felt before.

He moved his hands to the side of her thighs before pulling her legs down to either side of him. “I love looking at you from here.” he whispered, wrapping his arms around her waist making sure she couldn’t get away from him.

She moved in to kiss him, softly at first before she felt his tongue glide along her bottom lip, a wordless request for her to open up. He paused for a second, taking her in while she caught her breath before kissing her deeper than before. She pulled his t-shirt up from the hem and he reached up over his back to grab it and whip it off in record time. Not one of his proudest moments, it caught on his watch as he tried and failed to fling it to the side of them and he made a mental note to try that move again when he felt her chuckle against the side of his neck. He didn’t much mind being a dork in front of her. She knew he wasn’t as cool as he made himself out to be.

His hands found their way into her hair as he caressed the strands out of her face. He loved how silky it felt between his fingers and how faintly it smelled of coconut, her signature smell by now. Her hands gripped his wrists before slowly moving up his biceps and grasping at his shoulders while he pulled her down onto him to allow her to feel how hard he was becoming from her touch. He wanted to know she was only thinking about him. She felt him push up into her core and arousing her even more. His breaths were getting shorter while his hands moved down her sides in an attempt to hook into her leggings and drag them down and off her body. She moved a hand away from his shoulders to help him with his mission but a tapping sound soon broke her from her reverie.

“Wait.” she was still holding on to his arms to steady herself until things went quiet and his hands froze on her waist. Their breathing levelled out quickly and Chris threw her a confused look. “Do you hear something?”

“What?” He gasped. “No, nothing.” He grabbed the back of her head and pulled her back down to kiss him hard. His hands firmly gripped her ass until she was putting pressure back where he wanted it. She quickly forgot what she was thinking about while he moved her slowly along his growing length. He moved one hand up her side, dragging her sweater up with it so his fingers could finally feel her skin underneath. Her hands were pushing down on his chest a bit harder and in a moment that took her by total surprised he quickly flipped them over so she was lying underneath him, completely encased by his strong forearms.

Kissing her was so easy he couldn’t believe he hadn’t done it sooner. Her lips were soft, some of the softest her had ever touched. He figured she kissed like she wanted to be kissed, and he wanted to kiss her back like no boy had ever kissed her before. It was soft and hot and breathy and turning him on immensely. Neither was trying to win a battle but rather seeking and enjoying their closeness, the sharing of this one single sensation, outside world be damned.

The prospect of being uninterrupted was giving him all kinds of ideas. Her breathing was hot against his skin and he knew she was in the zone with him. They’d never particularly been slow and up until this point, he hadn’t much minded but he knew there was some part of her she was holding back and honestly, it was thrilling to him that he was determined to figure her out.

Pinning her underneath, one hand reached down and grazed the inside of her thigh. A little more pressure just over her clit caused her breath to hitch with a sudden squeak ever so slightly until they smiled back into their kiss, tongues massaging together. Honestly, he could carry on doing this for hours if he knew for sure there would definitely be another time they had this opportunity.

She opened her eyes to find him resting so close above her and evidently relishing the way she was lightly tickling the back of his neck with her fingers. Another languid kiss followed before he caught the side of her neck between his teeth and pushed himself against her core, her wetness increasingly apparent to him. She was growing accustomed to his need to tease her like this that she almost missed the scraping sound that had returned, only this time it was louder and sounded like it was coming from just down her hallway. She would have loved nothing more than to continue focussing on the hot breath now ghosting across her neck and shoulders but, panicking, she grudgingly pushed him off her.

“Fuck, what is that?”

Helpless and slightly dazed, all he could do was watch her get up from the bed to stand by the door. With an ear close to the gap, she listened out for another sound. Quieter than before, she swore she heard what sounded like shuffling followed by something being dropped on the ground.

Spying him about to protest, she shook her head. “Nope. Nope, that’s definitely something.” She proceeded to tiptoe out of her room and down the hall towards the kitchen, her bare feet treading ever so lightly and managing to dodge the one creaky floorboard. She wasn’t sure what she was expecting to find but felt a brief surge of confidence knowing the vision of Captain America might alarm whoever was attempting to break in to her home and presumably try to murder them both. He was 6 foot and built like a tank, he could absolutely save them both if push came to shove.

Of course, no one was there that she could immediately see. Maybe something had fallen off the wall instead, or perhaps had been knocked over by a strong breeze coming in via the open window in the lounge? Maybe she was hearing things after all or maybe it was a burglar but they got startled and ran away when they heard footsteps inside. Maybe it was just their neighbour moving around next door but it sounded a little too close for that. She resorted to the only thing she could think of in that moment and picked up a spatula just in case.

Chris was reluctantly putting his t-shirt back on when he followed quietly behind her, shaking his leg to relieve some of the tension in his boxers. Something banged again but this time she was sure it was coming from outside of her front door. He could now hear it as well but wasn’t entirely sure what she was hoping to accomplish with a plastic spatula in her hand.

She held her finger up to her lips to stop him from making any noise and peered through the peephole. She couldn’t see anything. Gingerly, she decided to open the door and jumped backwards when there, on the ground hunched up and leaning against the door frame, was a rathe intoxicated Shanna. Her bag had been emptied in a hurry like she’d been trying to locate her keys, and her coat was falling off her shoulders. She was half-asleep.

Chris snorted from somewhere close behind Sarah unable to contain himself, instantly familiar with the view in front of him. Sarah exhaled with some kind of relief that they were safe from a mass-murderer.

“I don’t believe it...” she spoken quietly.

“I do!” Chris could barely stop the laughter coming out now.

She and Chris moved to help her into the apartment, each grabbing her under one arm. Chris bared the majority of her weight while Sarah carried her bag and as a many contents as she could find. They managed to manoeuvre her into her bedroom where she promptly fell forward, head first, onto her bed,

“Fuckin’ waster,” he laughed heartily before Sarah punched his arm to stop him from waking her. the room fell silent for a moment before the unmistakeable sound of Shan snoring took over. Chris closed the door behind them before following Sarah to the kitchen where she collected the remaining items that had fallen out of her bag. Picking up her phone, she checked for scratches.

“Well at least she didn’t lose it this time,” she held up the mobile to him but noticed he couldn’t stop grinning. “What’s so funny?”

“Nothing.” he shook his head. “I just wish I’d taken a picture of her. Scott would have a heart attack. Always told her she couldn’t handle her drink!”

“i don’t know how you’d explain getting hold of a photo of her.”

“Oh yeh, good point.” he chuckled in reponse. They regarded each other for a moment, Chris clearly hopeful they could pick up from where they left off.

“I think you should go,” Sarah thought apologetically.

He paused before answering, expecting her to have been joking. “Why? She’s passed out on her bed. She’ll be asleep for hours. Do you have any idea how many times I have seen her like this?”

“Have you any idea how many times I have seen her like this? She’ll wake up in the middle of the night and get into bed with me and it’d be a lot easier to handle if I didn’t have to explain to her why her bother was also there.”

“Sarah, we could throw a rave and she wouldn’t wake up.”

He was making no effort to move, instead fixing her with a stare waiting for her to recognise how ridiculous she sounded. His hands pinched at his hips and he looked a foot taller than before

“Seriously, Chris, you’re just going to have to leave.”

He took a couple of steps towards her, bare feet padding along the hard, cold floor. “I haven’t see you all week.” He moaned, hands reaching out for her hoping the memory of where they had been would be enough to convince her he should stay.

“That’s not true. You saw me the other day.” It was a weak response. Even she knew that.

“That’s not what I mean and you know it.”

She offered back nothing. She had no response. He was disappointed and equally as frustrated with his lack of a decent comeback. He should definitely stay. He should be rocking her world right this moment and whispering filthy things into her ear but instead, all he could do was stand there and shake his head in defeat. When he made eye contact with her again, she looked somehow smaller in some way and he found it hard to continue being frustrated with her. He understood what she was doing as much as he didn’t want to.

Resigned, he shuffled towards her and embraced her in a hug. She felt him semi-hard against her tummy, briefly doubting her choices. It stirred something exciting inside her to think she could make him feel that way and mentally chastised Shanna for cock-blocking her. She felt bad for kicking him out like this.

“I promise I’ll make it up to you.” she whispered.

He loosely pulled away from their hug and looked down at her. He playfully raised an eyebrow and looked down at her lips, still pink and swollen, before chastely planting a kiss on them.

“I am absolutely going to hold you to that.”

Shan finally made an appearance the following morning looking like death warmed up. She’d somehow managed to remove her clothes but had a pyjama top on backwards and her hair was sticking out in all directions. She had Sarah’s expert eyeliner and a false lash smudged down one cheek.

Sarah was eating breakfast and checking the news on her phone when she saw the creature from the black lagoon emerge into her kitchen. Stifling a laugh at the sorry sight standing before her, she felt a pang of sympathy seeing every step cause her pain. Shan just pouted at her before taking a seat at the kitchen table, resting her forehead in her hands while Sarah fixed her a glass of juice and some aspirin. She took it gratefully before groaning.

“Remind me never to do shots again.” she stressed. Sarah knew it wouldn’t last, not with that Boston blood coursing through her veins. “Was Chris here last night?”

Sarah froze, a sudden ring clouding her ears. “Erm, no, he wasn’t.” She turned to put her bowl in the sink and tried to hide any blushes. She didn’t know who felt more like shit in this exact moment.

“Oh I could have sworn I heard him is all.” Shan said, more to herself than to anyone else. “God, it’s good he wasn’t. He’d have a ball game seeing me in that state. How awful was I?”

“Not very,” Sarah lied again.

“How did I even get home?” she asked, trying to piece together the flashes of memories that kept racing through her mind.

“Um, I think your friends dropped you off in a taxi and you somehow managed to get up the stairs but then I guess you couldn’t find your keys...?” Shan managed a puzzled look. “You were slumped against the front door.” She refilled her glass with juice. “You’ve been in bed for, like, twelve hours.”

“Shit, we must have started early.”

“Well it happens to the best of us.” Sarah sat next to her and pushed a loose piece of hair out of her sweaty, red face. “Your hair looks OK! I don’t think there is anything stuck in it this time.”

Shanna laughed for the first time before her head panged in revenge.

“So? Did anything happen with Robbie?” Sarah asked, a cheeky grin crossing her face. By the look on Shanna’s face, the answer was a resounding “no” but it could very well have been the alcohol-induced hurricane currently running though her head.

“Well, it was a great night regardless. You’d love the bar. I think we ran into that guy, the porter from your hospital? Pat something? Did you know he plated in a band?”

“Um, no, not at all. Wow.” Sarah was trying to picture Patrick with an array of different instruments to see which suited him before remembering the awkward time he attempted to drum Phil Collins’ ‘In The Air Tonight’ with two scalpels. “Actually, he does seem the type. I’ll have to let Audrey know. She’ll love this.”

“He sounded pretty decent. It’s not just punk music or heavy rock. I think we should all go one night. Maybe as part of Mom’s birthday week.” Shanna perked up a little, proud of the idea that had materialised in her head against all odds. “It’s amazing what people can do when they put some effort in. Makes you wonder, doesn’t it? Where you might be now if you just took a chance.”

Following a night of heavy drinking, Sarah wasn’t expecting such an existential conversation at this point in the day. But it was a good point regardless. She grabbed her phone from the table and typed out a message to Greg.

“Yes. I’m in.”

#chris evans #chris evans fic #evans fic #chris evans x original female character #sarah bernette #clear the area

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yungblud-fics · 6 years ago

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loner

summary: the jocks lock you and the new kid from london in the janitor's closet. who knew it could lead to one of the best friendships you've ever had?

warnings: cursing, fluff, and bullying.

A/N: the story starts in your 8th grade year. then it fast forward's to your sophomore year in case my writing is confusing to you. he's a cutie by the way.

"fook," his heavy accent rang through your head. the new kid was hard to miss in the hallways with his hair all over the place, his bright pink socks, and of course his accent. he stuck out of the crowd in your american school.

personally, you thought he was cool. the way he dress, the way he acted seemed to draw your attention. he seemed like a genuinely good kid to you. but the rest of the school had something against him. they found the littlest thing to pick on him about, beat him up. didn't matter to them.

you turned around the corner and one of the jocks bumped into you, causing you, and your book bag, to be pushed to the ground.

"watch where your going, freak," they spat at you. this wasn't the first time this has happened. like the new kid, you had a hard time at school too.

"don't want to end up like the other one," they laughed. you knew exactly who they were talking about. you grabbed your bag and tried to run but they held you back.

"can't get away that easy."

you tried to kick off of them, find some way to get out of their grasp, but soon they had thrown you into a dark room and locked the door. you stood up and tried to open it, but to no use.

"c'mon, this isn't funny anymore," you pounded your first on the door.

"oh sweetie i think it is." their voices teased you from the other side of the locked door.

"they're not gonna let ya out mate," you turned around, startled by the voice behind you.

"i know, this isn't the first time they've locked me in here," you sighed. you were actually talking to him. granted, not the best time or place, but it was something.

"sorry 'bout that."

"wasn't your fault. they've done it for years."

the next moments were silent. the laughing outside had stopped and only your breaths could be heard.

"i don't bite y'know. despite what other kids are sayin', i'd like to think i'm pretty nice," he laughed.

he had been watching you since he first moved here. you had science, chorus, and math with him. he was always too scared to talk to you--scared you'd be like the rest of them and make fun of him.

you sat down, fairly close to the boy, setting your bag down across the room and laying your head against the wall. it was cold in the closet and there was no light.

"i'm dominic," he looked down at his feet, almost as if he was ashamed of his name.

"i'm y/n. i like your accent by the way," you smiled even though he couldn't see.

he looked up at you raising an eyebrow, "you mean that?"

"of course i do. i don't understand why someone wouldn't. it's really nice."

"thanks mate," dom was glad that there was no light because he was blushing like a little kid.

you shivered slightly from the cold and pulled the sleeves of your sweatshirt farther over your hands. you grabbed your phone from your bag.

no service.

shifting your attention to the time, you saw school had ended 20 minutes ago. that's great.

"looks like we're gonna be stuck here tonight. everyone in the school leaves by 4:00. it's 4:20."

(i'm so sorry i had to do 4:20)

"fook man," dominic groaned. he immediately shook his head, "sorry."

"what're you sorry for?"

"j-just my accent. i was just scared you'd make fun of me or hit me or somethin' like everyone else has."

you sat criss crossed next to him and clicked your tongue.

"wanna play 21 questions?" you smiled. he faced you in the same position and gave you the biggest smile you'd seen.

"yeh!"

"okay. favorite color?"

"pink, if ya couldn't tell from my socks," you laughed at his response.

"um, what do ya do in yer free time?"

"wow you're getting personal," you winked to him causing him to blush once again.

"i-i didn't mean-"

"i know. i'm just messing with you! mostly draw, listen to music. usually watch the sunset at night."

"i love watching the sunset too!" he got so energetic and happy, he felt like a different person. maybe the one he was back in london. he missed it there.

"okay, what do you like to do?"

"i like to make music, star gaze, i'm really adhd so i'm always movin'."

"wait you sing?"

he nodded shyly, "i'm not very good."

"sing a song for me. you have my full attention."

he stared at you for a good minute. you kept your eyes on his the whole time. he took a breath to calm down and sang the first verse of london calling by the clash.

you stayed quiet and mouthed the words to the song. when he finished, you clapped and cheered.

"that was amazing!! i love that song."

"thanks mate. i'm not good but i hope to perform one day. i just think it's so fookin' cool to just hype up people and be an artist ya know?"

he looked so passionate talking about music, you could tell he loved it. you smiled as your both continued the game.

"it's getting late," you said putting down your phone.

"yeh. um, goodnight i guess," dom stuttered out.

you laid down on the cold cement floor, but to no use got comfortable. your thoughts began to get the better of you just like every single night.

"y/n, are you awake?" dom whispered.

"yeah. can't sleep."

"why?"

you hesitated, afraid we would make fun of you. "just anxious."

"why?"

"the things everybody says about me gets to my head and i worry. usually ends with me staying up all night."

"me too. i ended up breaking down at 2 in the mornin' the other day," he nervously laughed. "usually wake up my sister so i can lay with her. it sounds stupid but that helps."

"my dad usually comes home early, goes to sleep, then leaves for work before i wake up. it's fun being an only child," you laughed sarcastically.

everything got quiet before dom moved over to you and laid down by your side. you laid down too, your faces now inches apart.

"am i too close?" he whispered.

"you're good."

he nodded before his breathe began to slow and he dozed off, you falling asleep soon after.

you awoke to the sound of keys jingling at the closet door. turning to dom who was still asleep, you shook him gently.

"hey dom, wake up. someone's here."

"five more minutes," he mumbled.

"nope," you pulled him up as the janitor unlocked the closet door. you both bolted out and to the school yard, already out of breath.

"wanna come back to my house?" dom asked

"yeah alright."

~2 years later~

"shut the fuck up dom," you whacked your best friend in the head with a pillow.

"i surrender," he spoke through laughs, putting his hands up.

you laid back down on your bed, legs dangling off the side, the record playing in the background and dom by your side. since that night you were both locked in the janitor's closet, you only got closer.

you looked to the window and sat up abruptly.

"c'mere."

you opened the window and jumped out onto the small section in front of it and climbed to the roof, dom following closely behind. you both had done this many times before--gone to your house, watched the sunset, then accidentally falling asleep while watching a movie.

the sky was painted with purples and pinks, shades of orange mixed in. you sighed happily, "it's always so pretty."

"mhm," dom's eyes lit up as he looked toward the sky. you look at him for a good two minutes before he turned to you and smiled.

"what?"

"nothing."

"but ya were staring at me," he said softly. you nodded lightly, gesturing to go inside.

after climbing back through the window you fixed the blankets on your bed.

"do you want to stay the night?"

he opened his mouth but you cut him off.

"no you won't be bothering me or my dad."

"ya weren't even facing me! how'd ya know i was gonna say that."

"i know you."

"yeah, i'll stay."

after watching nightmare before christmas, dom started to doze off. you both already put lounge clothes on, so you put away your laptop and turned to him.

the butterflies in your stomach returned and you swallowed back a lump in your throat.

"i'm gonna get water. do you want anything?"

"i'll come with you."

you both quietly walked down the hall and into your kitchen. it was pretty dark and your dad had gone to bed downstairs hours ago.

you started to fill a glass of water and suddenly got a burst of confidence.

"fuck it," you mumbled.

"what're ya fookin' n/n?" dom laughed.

you turned around and crashed your lips onto his, then pulled away and smiled.

dom was speechless. he wanted to do that since the day he met you. he pulled you into him and hugged you close.

"i love ya," he mumbled into your hair. (A/N: *ahem* will you marry meH)

"i love you. c'mon let's get some sleep."

you walked hand in hand back to your room. it brought back those butterflies that filled your stomach.

jumping onto your bed, you made room for dom who immediatly grabbed your waist and dug his head into the crook of your neck.

"g'night love," he whispered, sending shivers down your spine.

"goodnight dommy," you kissed his forehead and soon drifted off to sleep.

A/N: hi frens. as i said before, my mental health isn't doing it's best but i have lots of requests. i'm doing about six right now so hang tight with me <3

thank you for reading!!

#yungblud #yb x reader #dominic harrison fanfic #dominic harrison #yungblud fanfic #yungblud x reader #dom harrison.x reader #dom harrison x reader #dom harrison fic #dom harrison imagines #dominic harrison imagines #dominic harrison fic #yungblud fan account #yungblud fic

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hazkiwislutt · 6 years ago

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it’s more than skin deep.

{ it’s athena!! the main character is african-american, because this is inspired by my best friend, who is african american and does not deserve even a sliver of the hate she gets and the opinions formed about her, all because of her skin. the quotes at the beginning of this piece are things that people have actually said to my best friend. disgusting, right? do not insult african american girls, do not fetishize african american girls, do not take advantage of african american girls. for my african-american ladies in the world who want a story where someone sees that your character is more than skin deep, here you go. please enjoy every second of it, because you deserve it and so much more. i love you! }

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but you’re too black for me.”

“I think the only reason I like you is ‘cause of your skin color... I’ve never been with a black girl before.”

“I only wanted to sleep with you ‘cause most black girls are curvy, but that’s it... I don’t really want a relationship with you, ‘cause I don’t think we’d be compatible since we’re... different.”

“Ew, what the fuck? Sorry, but I don’t date black girls, I just can’t get past your color and what comes with being black, if that makes sense?”

“Being with a black girl seems a little difficult and I’m not sure I could handle it.”

The words echoed around in her head as she watched the scene unfold. This was nothing new to her, unfortunately. She’d felt these feelings before, seen these things before, experienced these things before.

Her best friend had taken her to eat, insisting on treating the two of them to a nice dinner because she’d gotten paid and she felt that they both could use a night out. They’d made reservations at a swanky bar and grill, where the drinks cost more than the least expensive item on the food menu and the waiters and waitresses relentlessly tried to swindle them into more alcohol, because “this one is a great deal, ma’am, think it’d suit your bruschetta quite nicely while you’re waiting on your meal.”

It was lovely; the food was delicious, albeit overpriced, and they giddily sipped their expensive wine while trying not to laugh so loudly as they imitated posh aristocrats sitting at the bar. It was all lovely, until suddenly, it wasn’t. Not for her, at least.

How could it be lovely, when once again, she was under the microscope of this man’s eye, and he wasn’t even trying to cover up his distaste at what he saw?

They had just been in the middle of a case scenario, her best friend tittering and swirling her wine around in her glass before commenting in a snotty voice, “And then I said to Jennifer, who do you think I am? I’ve got enough money in my bank account to yeet you out of existence!”

They’d both doubled over, howling with laughter, until someone had cleared their throat, and they both turned in their barstools to see a man standing before them, with sandy brown hair that was combed to the side and hazel eyes. His hands were in his pockets, and he wore a baby blue button up with slacks. Clean, fresh, and carefree were the exact words that could be used to describe this man.

“Hello, I’m Jake. I’m sorry if this is a bit weird, or too forward, but you look absolutely stunning.” He flashed a pearly white smile to her friend, before extending his hand.

She knew how this would play out before it even began, and she braced herself for the words, or the stare that were guaranteed to follow this introduction. She heard her friend introduce her, and she felt Jake’s eyes scrutinize her before giving her the look. Clean, fresh, and carefree might describe Jake, but dirty, disgusted, and bothered were the words that described his stare.

“Oh, uh... Nice to meet you, but I actually came over here for you.” He quickly shook her hand before turning his attention back to her friend. Jake had only looked at her; he hadn’t said anything like the words that were pounding in her head, but he didn’t have to. They way he looked at her, if only for a few seconds, was enough. She knew what he was thinking, forming his opinions, fostering his disgust toward her, and her brown skin.

It was always about her and her brown skin.

“I’m going to use the restroom,” she says, reaching over to squeeze her friend’s knee before standing up and sauntering to the hallway where the restrooms were located. Her friend stuttered on her name and reached out for her wrist, but she shook it off gently. Upon reaching the bathroom, she opened the door swiftly but closed it softly, before resting her back against it and sliding down it’s length, sighing deeply as she rested her head against her knees.

She was still for a moment before standing up once again to examine herself in the mirror, fluffing her hair and adjusting her hoops. She scrutinized herself, piercing herself with eyes that were sharp and harsh. She felt her face burn with irritation as she washed her hands, but not because of squeaky clean Jake who looked like every other man in that bar.

Rather, she was irked that this continued to happen to her, over and over again, and the injustice of it all seeped through her body as she paced around the restroom, trying to estimate whether stupid Jake would still be out there flashing his unnaturally white smile and trying pathetically hard to swoop her friend up.

She sighed and finally decided to just endure whatever situation lay out there for her; there wasn’t much she could do anyway, since her friend was the one who drove.

Her friend was still sitting at the bar, but not alone as she’d hoped. Instead, her annoyance quickly morphed into a quiet anger as she realized Jake had taken the spot she’d excused herself from five minutes ago. Her friend made eye contact with her from where she stood, eyes widening and subtly motioning her hands towards him, mouthing a quick apology. No apology needed, though, she thought exasperatedly, since this seems to happen all the time.

She made a beeline for an empty seat at the very end of the bar, walking briskly and breathing heavily with the burden of her rage. She sat down heavily, lacing her hands together and swinging her feet like a metronome, before ordering a glass of water that would hopefully help her get a grip on pent up emotions that were running wild.

She’d pulled out her phone, skimming her messages, replying to her mother, checking her twitter, and most importantly, scanning the dankest meme pages she could find. She came across a particularly stupid one, but it still made her snort and choke on her water, making her cough aggressively as she let out a loud chortle before clamping a hand over her mouth, stifling her giggles so as not to disturb others around her. The longer she stared at it, the more her shoulders began to shake with laughter, and she felt her spirits lift a tiny bit.

“S’cuse me, love,” drawled a low voice, tinged deliciously with an accent and adorned with a slurred lilt. She stiffened immediately, not wanting to be the subject of anymore scrutiny after tonight’s events. Reluctantly, she turned around, expecting to see a cold stare, or even a hungry one. Instead, she was met with clear green eyes that were crinkled in a friendly smile.

He was very beautiful, with hair that was tousled and long enough that it curled a bit at the ends and a soft smile that was accompanied by a prominent dimple. But tonight had left her tired, and impatient, and she didn’t know what this man’s business was with her, but she decided to plaster on the strongest smile she could and kindly ask him what she could help him with.

“Forgive me,” he began, “if this is weird, but I heard yeh laugh an’ it was the most beautiful thing ever. Made me laugh along with yeh, an’ I didn’t even know what yeh were laughing at. Just thought yeh should know, ‘cause yeh tried to stifle it at the end, an’ I didn’t think tha’ a sound so pretty should be silenced.”

She slackened a bit, dropping her shoulders and cocking her head, before giving him a small smile. No one had ever voluntarily walked up and said something like that to her. She’d almost felt a tinge of guilt for awaiting the hateful stare or the ugly words that she’d thought would come from this interaction. It’d happened too many times for her to not think that it would.

“Thank you, that’s very nice of you to say,” she replied softly, nodding her head as he gave her a blinding grin in return. He shuffled in his spot, smiling and the ground and twiddling his hands and drawing attention to the rings that adorned his fingers as the clinked quietly together.

“I, uh, I noticed yeh were sittin’ alone. An’ I was wondering if I could join yeh,” he started painfully slow, as if calculating what he wanted to say, “but yeh can totally say no, ‘cause I don’t mean t’intrude on your time.” He shyly looked up at her, and she nodded again, turning her stool to face his as he took it.

“M’Harry,” he said, extending his hand and shaking hers with such a friendly execution that she was stunned into silence before introducing herself.

“So, wha’ was it tha’ made yeh laugh like a songbird?” He wiggled his eyebrows at her and she laughed once again, before pulling her phone out and finding the picture that had brought this man to work up the courage to talk to her.

The picture turned into something much deeper, very quickly. One picture turned into bursts of brightly colored conversation; she laughed without stifling her sounds, and each time, Harry looked at her as if she’d just created a sky full of stars just for him. They spiraled through as many topics as they could touch, debating if ranch was better than ketchup, or if humans were really the only forms of life out there, or whether soccer was better than football, or if Harry’s sister and him were closer than her brother and her.

One picture turned into the crowds of people slowly dwindling down to just them, and the waitress telling them the bar would close in a few moments. She looked around, and concluded her friend had probably left without telling her, but Harry offered her his arm and she looped hers through it as he guided her outside.

“Christ, tha’ was the most fun ‘ve had in ages, y’know? Yeh’ve got a story for everything, don’t yeh, love?” Harry was beaming at her in the late night air, and she couldn’t help but smile back.

“Suppose I do. You’re great at listening, so thank you.” He nodded eagerly, before pulling out his phone.

“I’d like t’listen to yeh over brunch tomorrow morning, if yeh’ve not gotten tired of me? M’sorry again for intruding on yeh’re alone time, but I just had to talk to yeh.”

And this was new, she thought, as she reached for his phone with shaky hands due to an excitement she couldn’t possible contain. This was very new, she thought, as she punched in her number and handed it back to Harry, who took it from her, and captured her hand in his so that he could squeeze it in thanks.

“Hey, Harry,” she began before she even realized the words coming out of her mouth, “why’d you come over to talk about my laugh?”

He’d cocked his head at her, looking at her confusedly as he processed her question. She’d looked down, eyes fixed on how he was still holding her hand, watching the stark contrast of his skin against hers, and he’d suddenly understood why she’d been alone, and why she’d wanted to ask this question. She shouldn’t have had to feel that way.

“Oh, love,” he murmured, stroking her hand with his thumb as he tilted her face back up to look at him, clucking his tongue, “it’s more than skin deep with yeh. Don’t yeh forget that.”

#harry styles story #harry styles #harry styles blog #harry styles imagine #harry styles writing #harry styles blurb #more than skin deep #fluff #athena writes #here she is!#african american #african american main character #writing #i hope you like this #iim sorry if its not very good #please let me know #what you think of this #thank you #i love you!

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csykora · 7 years ago

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i don't know if you know the answer, but if you do, would you mind explaining why some Russian names are always transliterated the same way (like Никита to Nikita), but some very much aren't? i've seen Evgeni, Evgeny, Evgenii, Yevgeni, and Yevgeny - is one 'more right' than the others?

Thanks for asking! You’re right, there’s some whacky variation in the League right now, and it’s something I’ve been wanting to talk about for a while.

(I’m going to focus on North American English speakers: if you’re not, sorry! The basics should still apply and make sense.)

The NHL follows the International Ice Hockey Federations 2011 standard for transcription of Russian names. Probably.

The NHL is a loose confederation of franchises. Historically, it’s been up to each team what they wrote on their Russian players’ jerseys. A lot of their creations were more artistic than phonetically accurate, but the surname would stay pretty consistent for PR and jersey purposes. First names were a free for all, with the team and official NHL media or licensed materials like video games all spelling them differently.

It’s still technically up to teams, but since 2011 the League is pushing a little harder to pick one spelling and stick with it across all media, and to have the spelling reflect how the name should be said.

Any Russian player who came over before 2011 is grandfathered in as whatever spelling they were assigned at the time, for PR reasons. (Like Craig MacTavish being the only one on the ice without a helmet, but less horrible.) Anyone who debuts in the League today should, theoretically, be assigned a spelling that follows the new rules.

The IIHF transcription standard has three basic principles:

Sound-emulating: Yevgeni instead of Evgeny

Simplicity: Yevgeni instead of Yevgeny, Alexander instead of Aleksandr

Consistency: same spelling for same name (and different spelling for different names)

Sound-emulating

What does Russian sound like?

youtube

This is one of my recital pieces, Tchaikovsky’s Moy geni, moy angel. Music is a great snapshot of the sounds that a language likes to use, particularly the vowels. Listening here, you’re going to hear a lot of “eh” and “ooh”, a lot of soft schwa sounds, and no “ae” or “oh”—the only long vowel is “ee”. You might pick up an odd nasal quality to a lot of those sounds, as if the singer is actually say, “yeh” or “yoo”.

Russian has different phonemes than North American English. A phoneme is “any of the speech sounds which are perceived to be a single distinctive sound in the language. An example is the English phoneme /k/, which occurs in words such as cat, kit, scat, skit.” There are a couple Russian consonants that seem to give English-speakers trouble (most obviously Ж in hockey fandom. The (Y)evgeni(i)ys just have to go and confuse North Americans more by also calling each other Женя, “Zhenya”, which fans often try to say with a G or a J sound. It’s pronounced like the S in “pleasure” or “treasure.”) But mostly, it’s all about the vowels, which don’t line up with English spelling or pronunciation very neatly.

In North American schools your teacher probably talked about how English has long and short vowel sounds.

And Y does double duty, as a mystery vowel and a consonant that can jump in before or after other vowels.

You’re not really going to hear any long vowel sounds in Russian, except for ē. Instead, Russian has hard and soft vowels:

The hard vowels are close to English short vowels. The matching soft vowel is pronounced pretty much the same but you glide into them with a “y” sound.

So Э and E are “ĕ” and “yĕ.”

O and ё are “ŏ” and “yŏ.”

(Standard Russian speakers splinch O and A (“ŏ” and “ă”) into a schwa sound, a phenomenon called аканье/akanye.)

And so on.

The exception is Ы and и, who are both shifty characters. Ы drifts between ĕ and ĭ, and и moves between ĭ and the long e sound.

(“и” also happens to mean “and.” You’ll hear hockey players, especially Kuznetsov, make a sort of horrible high-pitched eeeee sound all the time in interviews. That’s Russian Hockey Player for “…uh….” )

й is the Cyrillic character for the Y-consonant sound after a vowel, as in “Moй/Moy”. The symbols ь and Ъ can also appear on their own, and they palatalize the consonant before (adding a sort of Y twist to the end of it), or explicitly forbid you from doing that. This sound is rendered with a J or a Y after the consonant in different Russian transliteration systems. The IIHF uses Y.

So when we get transliterating, we’re going to have to have Ys all up in everything.

Евгений

This is where the many Yevgenis come in.

Every Евгений is best said as “Yev-gen-ee-y.” (I’d say it kind of ends in a little Y twist, but that’s because it’s kind of easier to say and a Cyrillic spelling artifact. You say “Yevgeneeee” or “Yevgenee-y” depending on your natural voice and how quickly you’re speaking.)

You don’t necessarily say the first syllable with a heavy Y like “yeah,” but the glide has to be there. “Eh-vgen-ee” would be an entirely different name, spelled Эвгений. And Э just isn’t a very popular sound in Russian: only 2 male names start with it. Maybe there’re some hipster parents out there naming their son Эвгений right now to annoy people, but otherwise, no.

Simplicity

Since Y is playing an important role in the basic vowels, we don’t really want to use it to represent the long e sound the way it sometimes does in English.

So “Yevgeni” is preferred over “Yevgeny” or “Yevgeniy.” Yevgeniy is the most technically accurate, but let’s be honest, North Americans are going to pronounce them all the same and the second two are just way too much Y.

The one time you will see reliably Ys standing alone is in patronymics. Yevgeni Kuznetsov’s father is also named Yevgeni, so his full, intensely boring name is Евгений Евгеньевич. “Yevgeneey Yevgen-ee-e-vich” is not exactly a delight to have to say. The suffix -евич/-evich means something, so you don’t change the letters in there, but you can drop the last vowel of the first name and palatalize the last consonant, making it into an easier “nyuh” sound. So it becomes “Yevgenyuh-evich,” which we can transliterate as Yevgenyevich.

With a name like “Aleksandr,” the IIHF standard says go ahead and spell it as the familiar “Alexander,” because you’re gonna pronounce the two the say anyway.

Consistency

So every Евгений whose name is pronounced the same way should be spelled the same way—and players whose names are pronounced differently…should be spelled differently.

Семён и Сёмин

The IIHF standards were introduced after feedback from Russian players, most directly Semyon Varlamov.

By 2011 the NHL had officially spelled Varlamov’s given name, Семён, as:

Simeon

Semyen

Simyan

Simyon

Semin

and of course, Semen.

Ah, cross-cultural respect.

Listen, the fact it’s Varlamov makes that feel just. But it was being done randomly to everyone.

And it was especially on the nose because Varlamov was on the same team as Александр Сёмин—Alexander Semin.

Semin’s surname, Сёмин, is pronounced something like “Syaw-min”. (Akanye turns it into an A-sound, which is how his nickname, Сёмa, is pretty much pronounced “Sam,” rather than the way North American fans probably read it when they see “Sema.”) Under IIHF rules, his current KHL jersey is spelled SYOMIN.

But when he entered the NHL someone said, “That sure looks like an e to me,” and wrote down ��S-E-M-I-N” Few years later that same spelling wizard looked at Семён (pronounced “Sim-yawn”) and said, “Man, I got this.”

Team officials, media, fans, even their teammates read the Latin spellings, naturally assumed their names were pronounced the same way, and went around calling both of them the same thing. Someone yells something that sounds like “semen” in the locker room, or on the ice in the middle of a game, and both of them have to turn around.

Semyon addressed the pronunciation with media, pointed out the confusion with his own teammate, filed paperwork to officially change the spelling (because he had to do that, the League had functionally taken away his name), and contacted the IIHF to ask them to step in, which they did.

(Semin did…nothing, because he would literally rather turn into a snow leopard and run away to nap in the sunshine and eat flowers and squirrels and live in the forest forever than talk to an official. So his name is still spelled SEMIN.)

More “Right”

Pronunciation isn’t a moral issue. As we grow up, our mouths learn to shape the phonemes we’re using all the time and our brains trim away the nerve connections for making sounds we don’t need. Some of us can learn some of those back, and some of us can’t, and we certainly can’t learn very well if we don’t have examples and help.

And it is strikingly hard to find that for Russian in North America.

Until the ’90s, management and especially announcers had no way to hear names pronounced before they had to try to spell or say them because there was no real cultural exchange between North America and the USSR: no TV, no radio, no way to hear the voices of Russian people except briefly on the ice. Miracle had Al Michaels recreate his goal calls because at the time he’d only had a hasty list of the Soviet line-up that he begged off the officials, and he took a wild swing at Vyacheslav Fetisov. A decade later Fetisov came to America and we were able to hear him speak and learn his name.

It’s unimaginable now, but when Ovechkin was drafted, many broadcasters were calling him “Alexander ov-itch-kin,” not “Oh-veh-chkin.” Because they actually did do their homework: they were trying to listen to Russian-language broadcasters and recreate their pronunciation. If you hear a Russian speaker say it, the middle vowel does sound a lot more like an I than a drawling North American “eh.” But then we all said it a thousand times a day and our mouths settled into sounds that are comfortable for us.

Which is fine, we’re not in any way Wrong for calling him “Oh-veh-chkin.” Just saying a Russian person’s name differently than native speakers say it isn’t a horrible thing. (‘Native speakers’ of every language fight each other all the time, too.) What matters is respect: trying our best to transliterate and pronounce a name shows that we’re listening to that person and we’re valuing them.

I think it says something that it’s still hard to hear any Russian in North America, it’s still hard to learn these names, and so we still say them in a very North American way. Even if we’re not the ones making it, the Russian voice still mostly exists in our consciousness as a joke.

Sometimes that joke feeds into innocent not-quite-accuracies. And sometimes like with the Se(i)(y)(o)mi(y)(o)ns, it feeds something that feels a little…less of us.

It’s been 16 years* and we’re still turning their names, one of the few personal things they were able to bring with them to the foreign world of North America, into dick jokes. It’s hardly the worst insult in the world or in the NHL: making each others’ names into dick jokes is hockey players’ primary sport. It’s just that the foundation of the joke is, “I actually didn’t take the time to listen to you say your own name,” and that makes it seem small of us. And it seems smaller after they made repeated requests and took legal action to ask for their names back, and we’ve not only kept doing it, most of us don’t know or remember that they asked us to stop.

some very much aren’t

It’s worth remembering Russians still make up a small percentage of the NHL, and most of the active Russian NHLers came over before 2011.The Russian voice in North American hockey is still small. So the spelling of Russian names is still controlled by North Americans NHL officials, and it’s a small and wild pool of possible spellings. Change comes slowly, if it comes at all.

Most of the new prospects’ surnames do seem to have been effectively standardized, but I’m not really sure where future Yevgenis stand at this point in the NHL. Евгений Свечников is the newest I know of: under IIHF rules he’s Yevgeni Svechnikov, but it seems he’s still being spelled “Evgeny” in the NHL. Because it’s such a common name and several Yevgeni-spelled-Evgenys have been high-profile players, we’re all already used to seeing Evgeni and Evgeny, and NHL officials might easily choose to keep using them for PR reasons.

This was fun! somebody ask me about nicknames or patronymics or the Czechs next, please. I need to keep expanding my embarrassing tabloid glitterbomb vocabulary.

#long post cw #Russian language #semyon varlamov mention #Sasha Semin #evgeny kuznetsov #nhl media

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