#zach woods
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d0rky-0utfits · 5 days ago
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I neeeeed him
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thelovewittch · 8 months ago
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WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS S06E08 | “P.I. Undercover: New York"
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geeking-n-tweaking · 1 year ago
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Gabe definitely likes to get pegged 🗣️🗣️
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harveyguillensource · 8 months ago
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Set photos from WWDITS Season 6 Episode 8, P.I. Undercover: New York.
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relentlesshag · 10 months ago
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emotionallymutilated · 7 months ago
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zach woods on the ‘wish fulfillment’ of silicon valley’s erotic fan art. (source)
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limmystardust · 7 months ago
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what the hell, sure.
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wow-bleh · 5 months ago
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I am not ok. I think my life peaked when I read this. I sat and stared at a wall for abt 5min as I tried and failed to process it.
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h3rb3rtw3st · 9 months ago
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It's been several months, so I'm thinking about Avenue 5 again. The POTENTIAL this show had, only to cancel it after 2 seasons. God, it was so good. Hugh Laurie as a bisexual, polyamorous, cringefail space captain stuck on a cruise ship in space; several strong women; several cringefail women; Zach Woods; Josh Gad as an Elon Musk parody.
It was so good! And so funny! And it's on HBO Max still! And you should all watch it please please please
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a-dotrivenitupontop · 10 months ago
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zach woods is officially 40 today which means every single one of my Celebrity Crush Men so far are in their 40s. love this babygirl sm <3
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profeyandere · 3 months ago
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𝐆𝐀𝐁𝐄 𝐋. ─── ☾ 𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐒
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ʟɪɴᴋꜱ ↪ ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ ↪ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏꜰꜰɪᴄᴇ ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ ↪ ᴡᴀᴛᴛᴘᴀᴅ
ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏꜱ ↪ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 1.7ᴋ ↪ ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: ɢᴀʙᴇ ʟᴇᴡɪꜱ x ꜰᴇᴍ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ↪ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ: ꜰʟᴜꜰꜰ
English is not my native language, so I apologize for any mistake and if you can help me improve it, I will greatly appreciate it. I hope you enjoy it :D
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Winter was usually harsh everywhere in the world; at least, that was the general rule. The streets were often frozen; in some places, it even snowed. Icicles formed on the overhangs of the roofs, which had to be avoided as much as possible to prevent physical harm or an accident, and anyone brave enough to venture outside was wearing at least three layers of clothing, not including a coat. In short, it was a terrible time of year—or at least that's what Gabe had thought his entire life, due to the numerous “problems” that season had brought him.
Due to his height, which wasn't exactly small, and his thinness, which sometimes became worrying, Gabe tolerated the summer heat quite well and was always cold in winter, to the point of wearing a sweater and polo shirt in heated places. Some in the office assumed it was because he was simply strange, a strange man with a strange body that functioned oddly, while others with a bit more sense of direction thought he was simply a man who felt cold and couldn't tolerate the cold temperatures typical of the season. Although, clearly, he didn't care about any other opinion but yours and hoped you wouldn't think the first thing about him; he'd be quite embarrassed if you thought he was strange and, therefore, unworthy of your attention or that he wasn't worth your time as a person. As tough as he was, Gabe had felt very lonely most of his life because he hadn't had friends who shared his interests, or, on the other hand, the people who had approached him had only done so out of pity, which was truly deplorable. Gabe preferred that no one approach him and that people stop acting out of the desire to be the saviour that everyone seemed to have—even if that had never happened, and, in reality, everyone who had met him at least once avoided him because he was actually very weird. He tried; he didn't consider himself a weirdo, but everyone else looked at him like he was one and treated him like one, regardless of their stage of life or where they went to school or worked.
"Knock, knock!"
Gabe quickly turned his chair when he heard your voice—so distinctive and so captivating—while a smile began to tug at the corners of his lips. You looked so beautiful that morning, with your long coat that covered you to your knees and your wool hat lightly covered by a fine layer of snow that seemed to be slowly melting in the heat of the office. Gabe loved the heat in the office. He even had a small hand warmer at desk level so he wouldn't get frostbite or freeze throughout the day, and his work area was completely windowless, but that didn't stop the gusts of air from chilling him.
"Good morning to you too," Gabe greeted, realizing only seconds later that you hadn't actually said hello, so he shrugged and sighed softly, mentally slapping himself. "I mean, good morning. I said ‘You too,’ but you didn't say hello, so I said something stupid."
Your face broke into a warm smile, as sweet and tender as you were. Gabe practically adored everything about you; there was nothing he could say against you—not that he'd ever tried. You were kind to everyone; you were caring, and you even watered the office plants. You exuded love from every pore of your body and positivity that bordered on the absurd as if you were a beacon of light in a storm or hot chocolate on a winter morning.
Meanwhile, your thoughts wrapped around that charming man who always seemed as red as a tomato without even trying. Gabe had been strange to everyone in the office. Almost everyone had warned you about it when they hired you for the company's marketing department, given the sudden rise of social media and its gradual rise in popularity. But in reality, you found yourself facing a fairly normal man, with tastes that were different from everyone else's, but he was nothing more than an ordinary man. In short, given how he'd been described to you, you were expecting a strange monster, but in reality, it was just Gabe.
"Good morning," you greeted him back before closing the kitchen door to avoid the draft that would leave him freezing, as it usually did. However, that didn't stop him from hearing the thanks of many of the office workers in the main room. "I needed some peace and quiet. They've all gone completely crazy."
Your joke didn't go unnoticed by Gabe, who only smiled slightly. In all his years working for Joe, Gabe could assure you that the Dunder Mifflin office was anything but quiet. They were quite diverse in terms of thoughts, but the attitudes and psychology of the characters were so diverse that it often felt like a circus, and it was impossible to take them seriously. After seeing the huge hole in one of the walls, which had Andy's signature on it, it was obvious that that place could drive anyone crazy—or it was just a matter of time before one got used to the strange things that happened there. And Gabe, well, let's just say he tried to go with the flow as best he could, although, in the end, he failed miserably.
"Yeah, you do get used to your coworkers’ yelling and antics," Gabe stated, to which you simply nodded in agreement.
You were hired at the beginning of the year, and since it was December, it had practically become your daily routine. Even though you weren’t required to go to the office—having proven that the work you could do in a cubicle next to the cafeteria was also doable at home—you still preferred to stay in touch with all your coworkers, even if it meant returning home with a headache from the employees yelling at each other when there was a disagreement or when the pranks got out of hand. Although you had to admit, helping Jim with them was something you definitely wouldn’t miss for anything in the world.
"What happened this time?" the dark-haired man asked, to which you simply raised a small brown paper bag and a cup of hot coffee in your hands. "Kevin wanted your breakfast again?"
His assumption made you laugh, though again, it didn't surprise you.
"No," you denied, before adding, "The thing is, I brought breakfast for everyone, and, as always, everyone went crazy—specifically Kevin and Stanley."
Gabe didn't say anything; he just listened to you. Evidently, he didn't assume that “everyone” included him, though he was quite surprised when he saw you walk toward him and place the tall, seemingly freshly brewed cup of coffee next to the bag of chocolate chip cookies on his desk. At the time, he couldn't tell if it was a well-crafted joke by Jim—because maybe he knew about his feelings for you—or if you had actually gone out of your way to buy him his favourite coffee and some cookies that he definitely adored.
"You didn't think I'd forget about you, did you?"
Again, you caught him off guard. You always did something to make yourself stand out from the crowd, and now it had become clearer. For once, he felt included in someone else's social circle.
"Wow, thanks," he murmured before letting go of the computer mouse and placing his large hands around the coffee cup, feeling the warmth quickly penetrate his skin; he was so cold that his fingers were completely red. "I've never had this done for me before. It's really strange and charming of you."
Gabe couldn't believe he'd actually said those words in front of you until he saw how your eyes—large and beautiful—began to shine, and not exactly because of the spotlight above them both. He wasn't exactly a man of science; sometimes he believed in things that were perhaps subject to doubt. But he was a romantic man, and he considered himself the one who invented romance—or the best boyfriend on Valentine's Day. But he was truly certain that such a unique glow was produced by happiness. He was sure you were happy to have heard him say those words.
"It's nothing," you told him, leaning on the edge of his desk as you watched him slowly pull the coffee cup toward him, opening the lid to be greeted by the warmth of the drink. "I definitely wouldn't forget you. You bring me so much calm, and it's something I often need when I'm working in the office," you continued shrugging, causing your cheeks to redden slightly thanks to your smile and the feeling that had settled in your chest. "Besides, I know how cold it is in here, and I know you could use something to warm you up."
Your words warmed him—warmed his heart.
You were a special woman; he knew it from the moment he saw you walk through the front door of the office. But God, if he existed, would forbid him if he didn't say out loud the reason he'd had from the moment he met you until now. No one—absolutely no one—had ever done anything like this for him, and he felt like he owed you much more than a coffee and some cookies to make up for what you'd done for him.
Gabe didn't notice, but his pale blue eyes began to sparkle the same way you did, and his mouth opened slightly, forming a small “o.” Again, you found him charming.
At his lack of words, you leaned slightly toward him, and although for a moment you wanted to ignore your intrusive thoughts, you quickly backed off and decided to continue with your day, ignoring the rush of sensations his presence provoked in you. You hadn't realized that one of your hands had followed your thoughts for a few seconds, as it rested on one of Gabe's for a few moments before you left. The cold of his skin against the warmth of yours created a sea of sensations in both of you that left you speechless.
Gabe didn't notice his cheeks were burning, and you hadn't noticed how you had gently squeezed his hand over yours.
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canary-prince · 3 months ago
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ontheidiotbox · 1 year ago
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harveyguillensource · 8 months ago
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“Someone's jealous of my swag.”
Trailer for WWDITS Season 6, Episode 8, P.I. Undercover: New York.
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relentlesshag · 11 months ago
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emotionallymutilated · 7 months ago
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“I think [Jared’s] favorite day would be like you know, bringing breakfast in bed to Richard and then uh you know whatever. Taking Gilfoyle to Burke Williams.” (source)
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