#zero0reblogs

[colorcinabrio]

Today was full of annoying incidents.

I felt how the day just turned terrible and then worse.

The terrible part is how it affected my parents.

I admit: I didn’t help too much for solving them.

Actually, I blamed some incidents to my mother, but then, some of these events are more product what awful is the current social situation.

First, the cooking gas got over.

Second, the water got gone.

Third, the electricity service was cut for some REALLY silly thing. A REALLY SILLY THING! The guy who cut the electricity insulted my parents for their reaction of surprise.

For the great side, all the incidents got solved.

The water just returned after some hours. My parents bought cooking gas and went to the electricity service’s offices to comment about the incidents and the electricity returned.

Just some minutes ago, my mother commented me today’s the anniversary certain grave incident in my mother’s family and I was like “Well, now I can understand where came some of the dreadful vibes of this day.“

For other side, that comment remembered what I need to break the destructive cycle of abuse in my family.

If I don’t find the way for dealing with it, I can ruin my life.

If you read this, please send hugs for me and my parents.

Seriously, this day was horrible and kinda cruelly comincal for how orchestrated were all the incidents.

[colorcinabrio]

Warnings: about EDGY comedy, mention of murderer

This idea of “this serie is offesive to everybody, so no one can claim that’s ESPECIALLY ofensive to a group in particular“ is REALLY awful.

Remembers me some of the rare good jewels of commetary from my father, about the idea of a “democratic murderer“: someone who kill persons in an arbitrary way.

I guess my father didn’t know about the Zodiac Killer case, but the concept what my father was explaining is: just because something isn’t harmful to an especific group, it’s still harmful in the general sense to HUMANITY, especially to marginizated groups.

I know, comedy is one of these topics what needs to be analizated using intersectionality, because “doing fun from marginizated groups“ isn’t the same what “doing fun from privileged groups“.

[colorcinabrio]

Selfnote: Are BLEACH’s Aizen Sousuke powers related to Emotions?

If they are, what type of powers are these?

Possibly a ny of the next power asociated to “Emotion Manipulation“:

- Emotion Empowerment / http://powerlisting.wikia.com/wiki/Emotion_Empowerment

- Empathic Power Augmentation / http://powerlisting.wikia.com/wiki/Empathic_Power_Augmentation

-  Emotional Consistency / http://powerlisting.wikia.com/wiki/Emotional_Consistency

-  Emotional Power Link / http://powerlisting.wikia.com/wiki/Emotional_Power_Link

Comment these other BLEACH fans in Tw/itter.

Noting that Yoruichi Shihoin is listed as a character with “Emotional Consistency” power.

[colorcinabrio]

I’m crying.

I detest it.

I don’t want to do a generalizated blame to a website for the idea what I feel forced to put myself in a sexual orientation because everybody does it.

The idea what I haven’t chosen a determinated sexual orientation does me feel alienated in certain internet spaces.

IT’S EXACTLY WHAT I DON’T WANT TO FEEL!

I get what if I lack of experience in some topics, so there isn’t place for my opinions, but there are moments where people really start to destroy logic and attack people for random reasons.

I want to help, sometimes I try, but other times I don’t it because I fear some is going to say that isn’t my place to comment because I don’t have a determinated sexual orientation.

Maybe that fear is from the fact what I feel how that’s my fault being so indecisive about my true identity. The fact what lacking an identity causes me to think what I’m incomplete human, something to be destroyed for not fitting the standard.

I have ready felt like it since I was a child.

I know, I need to find a psycological help and I hope what I do.

For now, I want to have a good time.

[colorcinabrio]

I’m going to reblog these posts roasting EA today because the memetic nature of them just can last until tonight.

Also, reblogging some Unravel Two posts too!

By the way, save the internet!

https://www.battleforthenet.com/

https://www.fightforthefuture.org/

[colorcinabrio]

I feel how I want to cry because I feel how a failure as humanbeing , but in the same thing I can’t stop to think how ridiculous I am for that way of thinking and better I keep to doing some little activities until the time for go to sleep.

[colorcinabrio]

Warning: family issues

I hurt my mother some hours ago.

I apologized, but my apology felt really difficult to believe.

Then, that’s really stressful to give an apology to someone who believe have done NOTHING wrong, so NEVER apologizing of their harfulm acts.

I explained her what I got angry becuase she made me doubt of my memories, but she was so focus in her pain.

We are adults but it really is stressful to get together.

She uses my father manipulated to me to hate her, how if her negligence when I was a child wasn’t part of my issues with her

*SIGH*

I feel how I could avoid all that situation if I stopped my bitter behaviour and calling her about these little annoying acts she does.

[colorcinabrio]

I’m very angry and streessful with myself how for reblogging.

Anything is NOT working how I wish and I need to stop to be so prideful about how I want things turns.

If I want all gets better, I need to solve it myself.

BUT HOW I AM AWFUL PERSON, IT IS GOING TO TAKE A LOT OF EFFORT!

OF COURSE!

I want to punch myself.

Either I’m coward in internet or in REAL LIFE.

Coward or just prudent? I don’t know anymore!

I had emotional abuse but it isn’t an excuse for being terrible human being!

Psycological help in Mexico either is expensive or worthless. OR BOTH!

Not sure that’s going to happen this Wednesday.

I feel how I must to explain what I’m going to do the next weeks so I don’t turn in an obstacle to my older sister’s plans.

[colorcinabrio]

Warning: blood, another biologic stuff

I guess my interest in stories with blood is because when I was a child, between 6 and 10, I used to have a lot of nosebleeds, especially in summer and I spited a mix of saliva and blood for avoiding that blood close my notrils.

You know, I found some muscular move for pulling my nose’s blood to my mouth and spit it.

My mother thougth it was just “the high temperatures“, so she didn’t bother in take to a medic when it used to happen. Apparently my older brother had the same thing in that age too.

[colorcinabrio]

Yesterday, I went to “treat myself“ (that is how that is said, right? That’s a USA thing or Universal English language thing?) and all was right the first hours, but when I was going to take the bus to home, something awful happened.

Don’t worry, that was just “something I ate maybe caused me feel ill“ thing, but I don’t want get in details.

But how I REALLY enjoyed the day, I have this weird mix of “Maybe I was feeling guilty about having fun when I have a lot of home chores to do and spending money in unnecessaries things that I sabotage myself“ and “Well, that didn’t turned how I planned but I was happy for these hours and I got new experiences.“

For other side, my idea was “treating myself“ for giving new energies for doing homes chores and other activities, but how I walk so much my legs hurts.

But I keep this “happy feeling“ and I worry that I’m doing a fool of myself for having that mood when it haven’t helped me to do homes chores or being nice to my mother.

I guess while it helped to me to stop to have self-destructive ideas that kinda helps, right?

I’m confused but still having this little feeling of happined with me.

[colorcinabrio]

Getting into the Street Fighter lore, I can’t help to do contrast with “Overwatch“.

The usual could be a comparision with King of Fighters, but being honest, KOF is still living because the niche fighting game community. Also, Street Fighter took the pop culture status for the first fighting game with stereotypes by country.

Maybe I’m still thinking about that Overwatch have put in the category of “unfinished lore by lazy creators what the fandom tries to fill with their own ideas“.

In part Overwatch being released with a little lore and still using stereotypes what feels like the ones that Street Fighter have used since its first game in the last 80′s. It feels like “Wow... more 2 decades and so little have changed in a series with character from various countries“.

Unless King of Fighters and the previous videogames series what shared the same universe tried to do something different for giving the character a touch of personality. KOF has some tolerable inclusion in Asian representation. Still lack of characters with dark skin, but then, that isn’t the only game with the same problem.

I see you, Overwatch and the lack of black women when we have been these Overwatch agents in the game’s art.

Until KOF’s background and non-playable characters had some lore, aside of names.

[colorcinabrio]

*Next comment is full cynism*

Taking in reference how a lot series with half-made plots are so popular, I wonder why fighting games aren’t lack of the similar popularity in the actuality, with many fans doing headcanons and having conflicts about ships.

Either “popularity is relative“ or the theory these female fans are the ones who produce more creative works in the fandom is true.

[colorcinabrio]

I think what one of my annoying habits in getting into series what I’m new or just happened to know them for pop culture osmosis and/or being popular in some past time of my life because some character happen to be linked a lot of convoluted theories related to cultural references and esoteric symbols.

Other annoying habit is automatically shipping some characters for the same convoluted theories.

Ugh.

Look how I need to do more for stopping that last habit.

I feel how it overlap with “I just started to think about random shipping ideas as a funny creative exercise and now I’m having feeling for it“ thing.

Unless I am not going to attack the fandom just for enjoying a random ship.

[colorcinabrio]

Comments are welcome; NOT REBLOG.

I have tried to think how write about this topic, but I feel how I can’t redact a proper post about it.

That’s about “Not liking somethign is OK“ concept and the difference between it and proper criticism.

Also, thet fact what you like/dislike something can be product of unconscious thoughts what reflects a person’s social envioroment.

The most common example of this can be about main female characters with classic heroic tropes and how a lot of person call them “mary sues“, when a lot of famous main male characters has the same or exaggerated attributes what these persons blame the femalec characters as “unrealistic“.

Commenting this disliking of these female characters is product of a misogynist society and lack of women in creative spaces is a valid concept.

People wondering if they detest a female character because this is good, because they find how much misogynist mentality have polluted them and they go the wayto “unleanr“ it.

For other side, sometimes a person can like/dislike something and not be related some harmful social concept. Just happen to be that way.

For example: I don’t interested in stories with MECHAs.

I don’t find interesting humanoid-like robots what can be piloted.

Now, if go to psychonanalysis myself for finding the reason about this, maybe it’s what I used to watch some animated series with MECHAS when I was very young and I got really tired of them since then. Maybe the reason because I have the vague memory of these shows, my mind is like “remembering this just for being sure this isn’t an interest“.

Me lacking of interest in series with MECHAS is bad or good? Either, just happen what I am not interested.

Now, a lot of series with MECHAs have been criticited for sending military messages, some of them trying to subverting these messages but broken them because the way the series goes to frame how “cool” is the miltary stuff. Kinda like “you can’t do an true antiwar film” concept, because the only use of war related stuff give war relevance.

Returning my own opinion about MECHA: does this criticism is the reason what I don’t like MECHAs? The answer is: No, it happens what I don’t like MECHA, INDEPENTLY of that criticism, but I think the criticism is valid because the same concept can be apply to other type of series, as the historical genre about war.

That’s something what I detest about fandoms: just because someone doesn’t like an aspect of a show doesn’t mean they are the same person who are doing criticism of them.

There is this tendecy to put all the person who dislike a series and persons does criticism how being in the same category.

[colorcinabrio]

COMMENTS WELCOME; NOT REBLOG.

Look how the first season of “Craig of the creek“ is over and watching it can be just less 5 hours!

Maybe I’m going to do it this weekend!

Something what I have noted is I haven’t seen too much commented about this series. I have seen good things when the first episodes was aired, but nothing negative until now. Sounds great, but strangely, I don’t see this series being comment how the usual popular stuff.

Maybe that’s a good signal the serie is worth to watch.

I know what my perception of somthing depends of the blogs what I follow, but a lot of the blogs what I follow are mostly related to recent animated series and I found weird not seeing about this series so much.

[colorcinabrio]

Some comments about media, fandom and related stuff.

You can comment, but AVOID TO REBLOG.