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Some cool night time carnival photos from the first night of the Upland Lemon Festival

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It’s been a loooong time since I’ve shared a tarot reading…. I recently received a beautiful new deck from a friend and finally had a chance to try it out. :)

Gotta have my wand… :)

Per usual, the cards had inspiration to share with me tonight, so I thought I’d share my reading with you!

The New Moon Spread

TLDR:

Right now, my thoughts are trapping me in a whirlwind of feeling like I need to act, like I need to DO something to change my Reality. But I am in a position to resist and find my inner calm. I need to release this energy, this desire to move and make things happen; that energy is not needed right now.

To help me, I conjure the intention of simply Being, of watching things happen around me without reaching out to fight it or change it. The knowledge I seek, to bolster me, is that of the steady Earth: the wind may blow around me, but like a tender grass I simply bend in its gusts. I seek to nurture the outside world with love and kindness. The positive energy emerging around me now is the hope of the Star card: that understanding the divine nature of Creation and the vastness of the universe keeps me still and at peace.

The Full Reading:

1. R8🍃 (Where I am now):

• “In spite of the relentlessness of our thoughts, we dig deep to find the energy to fight against our prison”

2. MOON (What needs to be released):

• “de-escalation of activity; creativity-to-equilibrium”

• An impulsivity to take the anarchy around me and make something happen in the material realm.

3. DEVIL (Intention needed for growth):

• “escalation of activity; equilibrium-to-entropy”

• “transmutes the nonmaterial force of personal inner harmony of 6 into the material form of conscious adjustment via intellect in 8”

• “This thing is something that we ethically feel (or have felt in the past) harmonious about. We have willingly let this energy into our framework of values, and it is driving our actions—which are actions of non-interference and submission to obstacles. We are content to let nature run its course.”

4. R🌱🍃 (knowledge to seek):

• “If thoughts get the better of them, this page will be tossed about by the wind. They may become rude, insulting, and defensive, while trying to hide their discomfort in the howling torrent of thought.”

• Clarifying card: 🌊🌱

◦ “This queen is as at peace, with a peace like the stillness of a lake resting in the earthen bowl of a valley. She nurtures the material realm with love and kindness. She is clear-headed (and clear-hearted), patient, caring, and generous.”

• Note that Earth is the linking element between them...

• Seek the knowledge that comes from stillness and balance... (Look to the stars to help find that: see Star card below...)

5. STAR (emerging positive energy):

• From the Divine (inspiration) to our heart (our generator of Force); “de-escalation of energy; creativity-to-equilibrium”

• “transmutes subconscious, cosmic power into the force of unconscious harmony”--at rest; no need to stir the heart in any direction

• The divine “splitting of the atoms” of Creation leads our heart to Balance and Peace. I see the Natural mimicry of universal elements (remember I am the same stardust as the stars I see above) and that brings me Peace and Stillness--I am NOT inspired to stir myself to action.

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This is so interesting—I think it’s why lately making mental health breaks into fantastical rituals has been extremely invigorating for me. I use my tarot cards, light candle, select the appropriate crystals, and pretend I’m a witch on a mission to speak to my Inner Self and comfort or guide Her using arcane knowledge tucked deep inside of me. :)

A friend once told me that when they are struggling with getting laundry done, she pretends it is her sworn duty to smuggle the young prince out of the castle to safety, disguised in a laundry hamper.

Now, when I am struggling with hygiene, I pretend I am part of a village with an annual festival, and I get one day a year to spend luxuriously at a bathhouse in preparation.

What my friend imparted on me was the skill of turning mundane tasks into fantastical adventures to make them more compelling and bearable.

So next time you need to go on a mental health walk, maybe consider doing reconnaissance for a secret underground organisation.

Next time cooking is too much of a chore, consider you ability to turn space station rations into a feast to the delight of your crewmates.

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Ace of Cups. Art by Foniksvind, from the Witchy Magic Tarot.

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I had a really impactful reading today, in conjunction with a new system of Ritual I've been working with lately.

So the Theme (far left card) of the whole message had to do with my recent overthinking storm--just so many things going on in my head the past few days! The message of the Reversed 7 of Swords (🍃) that fit for me was how all of our own strategizing and overthinking can lead to our own self-deception.

The three Details (as depicted in the center column), from top to bottom, were:

Head: Reversed 9 of Disks (🌱) -- Any material success I think I have right now is largely superficial or overblown.

Heart: Reversed 10 of Cups (🌊) -- My emotional sense of "arrival" is dysfunctional and not stable.

Feet: Reversed Wheel of Fortune (4-7 on the Tree of Life) -- in this particular case, my own ethical consolidation is not stable, so when change comes (as it will), it may be a rocky transition for me.

The Advice Card (on the far right) was a welcome one: The Sun. Basically, the answer to my current state of chaos in my mind has to do with bringing my efforts out into the sunlight. I've been doing a lot of Shadow- and Dream-Work lately, so I took that to heart, and the first thing I did was a Shadow exercise where I mindfully acknowledge, in my conscious mind, the traits of someone I despise and start the work of integrating those traits (which do exist in me, though they are hidden) into my Inner Collective Whole.

So basically, the Sunshine of Consciousness can often be a balm to us when our spiritual work gets chaotic. :)

For more insight into how I read tarot using the Cabalistic Tree of Life, check out my book, "Arcana"!

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Litha Tarot Read: Happy Summer Solstice!

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Revised artwork — Futility & Karma …representing the 7 of swords (Futility) and the Major Arcana Judgment (Karma, here portrayed as the wings of Ma’at ). These are my Destiny Card and Birth Card respectively.

(This’ll be my next tattoo!) 🥰

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Queen of Pentacles. Art by Viv Tanner and Eli Baum, from Sefirot.

“Life’s but a bout, an inconstant stay, Where wasteful Time debateth with decay And all in war with Time for love of you, They take from you, while I engraft you new.”

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Animal Crossing Tarot Card T-Shirts made by MrMisprints

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Ok so I can’t help but look at the collection of various tarot cards within this one card…

From top to bottom we have:

Devil (“…something is taking over our actions or physical reality... This thing is something that we ethically feel (or have felt in the past) harmonious about. We have willingly let this energy into our framework of values, and it is driving our actions—which are actions of non-interference and submission to obstacles. We are content to let nature run its course.”)

9 swords (“We have been unable to fight the self-imposed prison of our mind in eight, and our thoughts clutter even our dreams at night, stealing any hope of sleep from us. Perhaps our never-ending guilt or worry is what plagues our mind day in and day out.”)

The Tower (in the center of it all): “…a necessary destruction (of preconceived notions, of established habits, etc) befalling us due to outside forces, in order to bring us to a place of submissive observation where we can reevaluate our situation.”

3 swords with two of the traditional 7 cups to the right of it (3🍃—“…the mind can easily become overwhelmed with a torrent of ideas and take our emotions for a distraught ride”; 7🌊—“Life becomes illusory, tempting us to chase after material things that will not fulfill us emotionally.”)

Death is on the lower left (“…we are moving from a place of unconscious harmony to a new place where we must consciously endure with patience and fortitude as the winds of change toss us about”)

10 of swords on the lower right (“If our whirlwind of thoughts has remained unchecked and unacknowledged up to this point, we will be overwhelmed and collapse under the cruel sting of their cutting energy.”)

The lower center is the 5 of cups, with the dog and wolf from The Moon just below it (5🌊—“When we are faced with emotional chaos or change, our hearts will seek an outlet where they can flow freely again”; Moon—“…a calming release in letting go, of not struggling to keep our Shadow selves or subconscious impulses ‘in check’. May our dreams guide us and our fantasies roam free.”)

Basically, even in the midst of emotional turmoil and a universe being turned upside-down, there is always hope, a brighter dawn ahead, and a peace in letting go or letting our Shadow Selves free.

All quotations from “Arcana: Numerology, Tarot, and the Tree of Life”.

new tarot card "fuck your entire life" and its a guy being attacked by devils and flaming skulls and wild animals and screaming and fire everywhere

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I did a thing. I’m proud of it 😄

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I LOVE Tumblr’s new icon!!!!

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I had a fantastic revelation in my therapy session today, and I thought there may be other creatives out there who could benefit from this…

For as long as I can remember, I have tempered my enthusiasm—the innate joy I feel while making my art—in the name of “being realistic” or “being humble”. At first it was clearly because my dad forbade me from pursuing these creative exploits at all professionally (he said he was trying to “protect me” from getting hurt), and so I always felt “wrong” for making music or writing stories, even though those activities brought me so much joy. I‘ve always told myself it’s wrong to be confident in my work, or that it’s wrong to be so hopeful and joyful in what I do.

Decades later, making music (and teaching about music) is my full-time career. My therapist helped me realize that it’s ok to acknowledge that I’m good at it. It’s ok to acknowledge and respect the absolute Joy I feel when I am being creative. The way she put it was, my eyes light up and my face animates with so much joy when talking about creating music—then there’s always a “But”…

This “But…” is the part of me that still places an emotional “lid” on all my creative activities. It comes out whenever I say things like:

“I want to win a Grammy someday… But it’s wrong for me to think that.”

“I want more people to enjoy my art… But I’m only one of millions of artists out there.”

Basically, I was reminded that there is nothing wrong with wishing and hoping and wanting great things for myself. I don’t have to shut myself down for being hopeful and excited—for knowing I’m good at what I do and loving what I do.

What would happen if I lifted the emotional lid of caution off of my creativity? What would happen if I truly embraced all that I know that I am? What might have I been “protecting” myself from by tempering my innate joy and creativity in the name of being “realistic”?

Here is the mantra I wrote out for myself today, in response:

Henceforth I will lift the Lid off of my Joy, and allow my True Self to shine ever-so brightly.

Here’s to all of us being willing to shine brightly and no longer restrict who we are, to ourselves or others!

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An interesting pattern in today’s reading…

Today’s cards are all hanging out around the Passive Pillar of the Tree of Life— the energy of the cards on this Vertical Plane include:

“Passivity, individualism, intellect, restraint, science, entropy, observation, and judgment.”

Basically, there’s a lot of entropy going on, and combing that with 3 of the 4 cards being Reversed, there’s a lot of resistance and blockage, too.

The Reversed Hanged Cat 🐱 and the Reversed Chariot are the Advice cards in this instance, which is to be aware of these blockages and resistance to the motivation to enact change.

Thanks to the presence of the Lovers in my Head-Space, the answer to achieving equilibrium lies with a change toward balance and harmony in my thoughts.

Awareness is most of the battle. Once we know something about ourselves, we get the choice to change it if we want to.

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A look at 8 (Located on the Astral Triangle, on the Passive Pillar)…

Head-Space: 8🌊 = I step back to observe my emotions thoughtfully.

Heart-Space: 8🍃 = I step back and observe my swirling thoughts, which interfere with my heart and trap me emotionally.

Feet: The Hermit (4 –> 6) = the action I take is to move inward toward quiet introspection, where I will find balance and inner harmony.