tellsjokes-blog

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jack dylan grazer as freddy freeman in shazam! (requested by anonymous)

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halloween/fall starters ! 🎃

masterlist of autumn and halloween themed sentence starters! 

​❝ i made pumpkin cookies! want to try one? ❞

​❝ thanks for bringing me to this fall festival. ❞

​❝ let’s go to the fall carnival! ❞

​❝ let’s go get a pumpkin frappucino! ❞

​❝ do you wanna go walk in the leaves with me? ❞

❝ did you cut yourself carving the pumpkin? let me see it. ❞

​❝ how does my pumpkin look? ❞

​❝ we can go get hot chocolate after this movie? ❞

​❝ want to go to this halloween party with me after school? ❞

❝ stay still i’m almost done with your costume. ❞

​❝ let’s paint pumpkins. ❞

❝ hurry up! we’re going to be late for the costume party! ❞

❝ help me decorate! ❞

​❝ let’s open some windows, okay? ❞

​❝ it’s starting to rain… ❞

​❝ bring a jacket! ❞

​❝ i didn’t expect it to get so cold. can i borrow your jacket? ❞

​❝ do we really need to go to a pumpkin patch? can’t we just buy one at the store? ❞

​❝ let’s go pick pumpkins! ❞

​❝ it’s chilly out here, you need a coat. take mine. ❞

​❝ you sound sick. are you sick? ❞

​*throws leaves on your head*

*sneeze* ​❝ sorry, allergies. ❞

​❝ wanna go out for halloween? ❞

​❝ looks like it’s time to rake the leaves… ❞

​❝ let’s go get hot chocolate then go for a walk. ❞

​❝ let’s go trick-or-treating! ❞

❝ let’s go jump in the leaves! ❞

​❝ come in here where it’s dry! ❞

​❝ it’s dark?! already?! ❞

​❝ ooh it’s chilly out. ❞

​❝ please, enough with the pumpkin spice. ❞

​❝ good morning. no, don’t get up, it’s raining, let’s stay in bed a little longer… ❞

❝ did you hear about the werewolf/vampire/witch roaming around this town on halloween night? ❞

❝ let’s go to the haunted house! oh, please, please, please, please?! ❞

❝ i don’t get scared. i’m practically fearless. ❞

❝ did you hear that? ❞

❝ we have to get out of here! ❞

❝ are you going to hide in my shoulder the whole time? or actually watch the movie? ❞

❝ i’m not going in a graveyard. ❞

❝ what did you get? ❞

❝ want to trade candy? ❞

❝ i got a rock. ❞

❝ don’t blame me! it was your idea to come in here! ❞

❝ what are you going as for halloween this year? ❞

❝ i just can’t wait for halloween! ❞

❝ you should totally buy that costume! ❞

❝ trick or treat! ❞

❝ happy halloween! ❞

❝ happy fall! ❞

❝ i wanna make sure that my jack-o-lantern is the best! ❞

❝ i’ll race you through the corn maze! ❞

❝ that guy in the gorilla costume has been following us for the past ten blocks. ❞

❝ aww come on! it was a prank! ❞

❝ please, please, PLEASE no scary movie marathon! ❞

❝ that wasn’t funny! ❞

❝ i keep tripping over my costume. ❞

❝ i’m not sure we should go down that street. ❞

❝ no fair! your costume is getting you more candy. ❞

❝ faster! we need to get to all of the houses! ❞

❝ forget being ‘too old’ to trick or treat. i’m doing this forever! ❞

❝ i don’t like these woods. ❞

❝ i just saw something! ❞

❝ look at that intestine cake! ❞

​❝ i’ll trade you candy. ❞

❝ i’m a real vampire. ❞

❝ do you think stuff really happens on halloween? like..supernatural stuff. ❞

❝ i made us matching costumes! ❞

❝ i think i just saw something move outside your window…is someone watching us? ❞

❝ you’re not going to make me carve this pumpkin all by myself, are you? ❞

❝ did you hear there’s a masquerade ball this halloween? let’s go! ❞

❝ you shouldn’t go out there! ❞

❝ s-scared? me? i’m not..scared. ❞

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           don’t care if he’s guilty, don’t care if he’s not                              he’s good

                                   &&  he’s bad

                                         &&  he’s all that I’ve got

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                                               (  y o u   d o   c a r e  )

                                                 you care so much,

                                           you feel as though you will

                                                    bleed to death

                                                with the  p a i n  of it

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its strange how we treat ourselves with such double standards. 

cruel treatment toward a friend or loved one… and we become  furious. yet, when the same is directed toward us? 

                         well, we’re used to it, right? 

            and, somehow…. that makes it   o k a y

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Best Buffy: the Vampire Slayer quotes  {Sentence Starters}

“Be brave. Live. For me.”

“I love you. I don’t know if I trust you.“

“Gee, can you vague that up for me?“

“Without passion, we’d truly be dead.“

“God! What is your childhood trauma?“

“You’re not special. You’re extraordinary.”

“Alright, yeah, fine. You’re a nummy treat.“

“The hardest thing in this world… is to live in it.“

“Power. I have it. They don’t. This bothers them.“

“It looks quiet down there. It’s not. It’s deafening.”

“We do not joke about eating people in this house!“

“I’m the thing that monsters have nightmares about.“

“If you want to kill the world, well, then start with me.”

“Can we just skip it? Can you just be kissing me now?“

“But, if you’re too much of a coward for that, then burn.”

“No one asks for their life to change, not really, but it does.“

“You’re really campaigning for bitch of the year, aren’t you?”

“I laugh in the face of danger. Then I hide until it goes away.“

“I’ve seen honest faces… they usually come attached to liars.”

“I may be love’s bitch, but at least I’m man enough to admit it.”

“I think I was in heaven. And now I’m not. I was torn out of there.”

“This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed.“

“I may be dead, but I’m still pretty. Which is more than I can say for you.“

“I’ve seen things you couldn’t imagine, and done things I prefer you didn’t.“

“You think you know who you are, what’s to come… you haven’t even begun.”

“You’re not friends. You’ll never be friends. You’ll be in love ’til it kills you both.“

“Love isn’t brains, children, it’s blood… blood screaming inside you to work it’s will.”

“Strong is fighting. It’s hard, and it’s painful, and it’s every day… and it’s what we have to do.”

“I’m standing on the mouth of hell, and it is going to swallow me whole… and it’ll choke on me.”

“Every single person down there is ignoring your pain, because they’re too busy with their own.”

“Everything here is hard, and bright, and violent. Everything I feel, everything I touch… This is hell.”

“It is always different! It’s always complicated. And at some point, someone has to draw the line and that is always going to be me!“

“I’ve seen your kindness, and your strength. I’ve seen the best and the worst of you, and I  understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are.”

“There’s just a body, and I don’t understand why she just can’t get back in it and not be dead…anymore! It’s stupid! It’s mortal and stupid!”

“When I say I love you, it’s not because I want you, or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are. What you do. How you try.“

“I want you to know I did save you. Not when it counted, of course, but after that. Every night after that. I’d see it all again, do something different. Faster or more clever, you know? Dozens of times, lots of different ways. Every night I’d save you.”

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We’ll have to do dinner Thursday night instead.

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harley vc: when ???  is someone gonna kiss me ???????  my lips are soft and strawberry flavored ??????

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  some  one  word  prompts .    (    send   one   of   the   words   for   our   muses   to   interact   based   off   that   word   )

goodbye :  my  muse  kissing  and/or  hugging  your  muse  goodbye.

secrets :   my  muse  sharing/confiding  their  deepest,  darkest  secret  with  your  muse.

nightmare :   my  muse  coming  to  your  muses  aid  when  they  awake  from  a  nightmare.

push :   my  muse  pushing  your  muse  out  of  the  way  of  danger.

embrace :   my  muse  abruptly  throwing  their  arms  around  your  muse,  hugging  them  tightly.

bloody :   my  muse  coming  to  your  muse  with  blood  stains  on  their  clothes  and  hands,  shaking.

drunk :   my  muse  takes  care  of  your  muse  while  they  are  in  a  drunken  state.

bed :   my  muse  wakes  up  in  the  same  bed  as  your  muse  with  little  recollection  of  the  night  before.

slap :   my  muse  slaps  your  muse  across  the  face  out  of  anger.

gone :   my  muse  stays  by  your  muses  side  while  they  take  their  last  breath.

scream :   my  muse  hears  your  muse  scream  and  quickly  runs  to  their  side.

sleep :   my  muse  falls  asleep  on  your  muse,  making  it  hard  for  my  muse  to  leave.

stalk :   my  muse  gets  caught  by  your  muse  trailing  behind  them,  watching  them.

sacrifice :   my  muse  jumps  in  front  of  your  muse,  sacrificing  their  life  for  your  muses  life.

trail :   my  muse  watches  as  your  muse  traces  one  of  my  muses  scares,  asking  them  about  it.

love :   my  muse  confronts  your  muse  about  why  they  never  say  ’ i  love  you ’  back.

piggyback :   my  muse  jumps  on  your  muses  back,  my  muse  gives  yours  a  piggyback  ride.

jump :   my  muse  runs  to  your  muse  and  jumps  up,  my  muse  holding  yours  up  by  their  thighs.

dance :   my  muse  holds  their  hand  out,  waiting  for  your  muse  to  come  out  and  slow  dance  with  them.

carry :   my  muse  carries  your  muse  to  their  house,  either  drunk,  or  a  weakened  state,  can  specify. 

lighter :   my  muse  pulls  out  a  lighter  and  lights  it  for  your  muse  to  use  to  light  their  cigarette.

shot :   my  muse  gets  shot  and  struggles  to  your  muses  house  for  aid.

wound :   my  muse  patches  and  bandages  a  wound  your  muse  has  gotten.

fight :   my  muse  stops  your  muse  from  getting  into  a  physical  fight  with  someone  else.

arrest :   your  muse  finds  my  muse  arrested  in  cuffs  with  swarming  police  everywhere.

hospital :   my  muse  awakens  in  a  hospital,  finding  your  muse  by  their  side,  asking  what  happened.

gun :  my  muse  pulls  out  a  gun  on  your  muse,  your  muse  tries  to  talk  them  into  putting  the  gun  down. 

betrayal :  my  muse  finds  out  that  your  muse  has  betrayed  them  in  same  way  and  confronts  them  about  it.

nude :  my  muse  walks  in  on  your  muse  accidentally  seeing  them  naked.

karaoke :  my  muse  pulls  your  muse  up  on  stage  with  them  to  sing  some  karaoke  songs. 

laughter :   my  muse  hears  your  muse  laughing  uncontrollably  and  approaches  to  see  if  they  are  okay.

murder :   my  muse  walks  in  on  your  muse  committing  a  gruesome  murder.

wet :   my  muse  strips  down  to  their  under  garments  and  runs  into  the  water,  motioning  for  your  muse  to  join  them.

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the most fucking uncomfortable thing for harley is coming out and he has to do it all the time and he hates it

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au where two people are connected and if one gets hurt or touched, the other feels it.

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also harley with a crush on a girl is the definition of schoolyard taunting.  he goes absolutely fucking feral around girls he likes

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hhhhhh harley wears flavored lip balm.  this is important.  also kiss him

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            i’m going under 

                          &&  this time… I fear there’s no one to

                                                                                 s a v e  m e

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                        ….. i was getting kinda used to being someone you loved

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                       Spoiler alert: 

                                                             the ending ain't  h a p p y

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right in the guts. angst sentences.

“It always comes back to this with you, doesn’t it?”

“Why can’t you just learn to let the fuck go.”

“Did it over occur to you that I never wanted this to begin with?”

“Why can’t you just look at me for one god damn second!”

“Let go of my hand.”

“I don’t want to talk to you right now.”

“Why are you — saying all these things —”

“You know what? I was wrong. You never really meant anything to me. You’re broken, you’re beyond fixing, you’re not something I want to take the time to handle. Simple as that.”

“You’re a god damn mistake, that’s what you are.”

“I never wanted anything to do with you to begin with.”

“This, us, was a fucking mistake and I should have known the second things went further than planned.”

“I can’t do this anymore.”

“I don’t want anything to do with you anymore.”

“If anything, you were a fucking waste of time.”

“I just don’t feel anything anymore.”

“Looking at you I see nothing but something I need to put an end to.���

“Oh? Really? You thought we had a future? What gave you that idea.”

“Is this even going anywhere?”

“Why can’t we just talk about it —”

“Does it ever occur to you that I am done talking? That I am done with reflecting upon my words and action? Can’t you just take a fucking hint that I’m done with you? I don’t want anything to do with you anymore.”

“We’re through. I don’t want to do this anymore.”

“You were broken to begin with.”

“How am I supposed to ‘love you’ when I never had feelings to being with.”

“Haha, I don’t know who gave you THAT idea, but we’re not an item. We never were.”

“I’d like for you to leave now.”

“Just get out. Get out and leave me alone.”

“Why are you — saying all these things??? Where did they come from???”

“If you never were happy to begin with, how come you never told me?! I would have listened, I would have helped —”

“I don’t need, or want help, what I want is for you to get the fuck away from me.”

“You’re damaged goods and I can’t find the patience to take on you as a project.”

“You’re the kind of crazy I don’t want to deal with.”

“Lately you’ve become a burden, and I can’t handle it anymore.”

“If you’d just leave me alone, that’d be great.”

“Oh come on, the second we got to know each other, the due date were already set on us. We were never meant to last forever. Our relationship had a deadline, and now we’re at it; so, what you gonna do?”

“This is all on you.”

“Save your tears. I’m done here.”