tenderwulf

[tenderwulf]

Well I was not accepted in the convention I was hoping to participate *mega sigh* 😩😩😩

[tenderwulf]

[tenderwulf]

i've been blorboed....

[tenderwulf]

quintessential cat owner experience

[tenderwulf]

He feels fingers on his chin, and his head is lifted to draw him into meeting Bakura’s gaze once more.

“Ryou,” he says, “tell me.”

It’s too much.

“You- you fucking idiot, you don’t- I didn’t think it would be this way! You’re supposed to be in here-” -and he pats his chest twice, three times, hard, hating every second that passes- “-not out off on your- that’s not how this works! That’s not how any of this is supposed to be at all! You’re supposed to be in here with me.” His throat twists and it’s painful, wringing out a helpless sob from his shoulders. “But you keep leaving and going far from me, again, and again, and I don’t know what more to do!”

Bakura stares at him in bewilderment. “I was- I was trying to be respectful of you-”

“And I’m telling you I don’t want your respect! I don’t need that from you now, after everything! I need- I need you,” he says, and he’s certain he looks like a wreck and not in the sexy way anymore. “So stop running away. You can’t- you can’t leave me again. You just can’t. Unless- unless you don’t even want me anymore-”

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” he interrupts, and Ryou falls silent, hiccuping softly. “I wouldn’t have gone if you’d just-”

“Because that’s not how it works! You’re supposed to chase after me even when I tell you to stop, that’s what you always did! You take what you want and I tell you no and you do it anyway! I thought you’d- I thought you’d-”

“Landlord, what am I meant to do with you,” he says with a soft sigh, and Ryou melts into the way his thumb firmly strokes his cheek. “I’m not going anywhere. Settle down. I was… I thought I was making amends to you by distancing myself. I thought you really did hate me.”

“How could I?”

“You said- You said I ruined you, I hurt you. Over and over. I think you hit your head somewhere along the way.”

“But you were there. Over and over, you were there. You ruined me- I didn’t know how to be alone anymore after you left! Why me? Was I just- just a body for you to use-”

“No,” he says, almost offended at the thought. “...You were the only one who ever felt right. In here,” and he touches Ryou’s hand, where he’s still holding it against his chest.

Ryou sniffles, and finally brings it to clumsily rub at his face with the heel of his palm. “Oh,” he says, and then Bakura leans forward to kiss him again.

“I think I do understand now,” he says softly when he pulls away, and Ryou startles and reaches for his shoulders as he moves to lay him back against the floor and- oh, Ryou had nearly forgotten about that. “Let me try it again.”

“No,” Ryou breathes, fingers curling into him. “You can’t.” Bakura’s eyes narrow, and his smile turns wicked at the corners.

“But it’s not really up to you, is it,” he says, and suddenly, the months of crushing pressure on Ryou’s lungs seems to ease for the first time, just a little bit.

[tenderwulf]

It was small and wide painting, something like stained-glass window sketch x)

[tenderwulf]

[tenderwulf]

'Hyperion' by Dan Simmons has a great example of immortality as parasitism, 10/10 horrifying

immortality as theft (you have to steal life from something else) immortality as parasitism (there is something else inside You that is keeping you alive and you become less of yourself more and more the longer it stays in you) immortality as violence (everything is trying to kill you because everything is supposed to die and the universe will always try to find a way to right the wrong that is You) you understand

[tenderwulf]

catching debtors

[tenderwulf]

i feel odd. i feel like i'm forgetting something.

[tenderwulf]

nothing has changed. nothing has changed.

[tenderwulf]

Yearning

part 2: Tender

[tenderwulf]

"why did you stop writing your story!!! never stop writing!!!!!!!!!!!" well you see the character had to drive one mile to a new location and the sentence "she got into the car" was quite simply my undoing

[tenderwulf]

hey everyone HEAR ME OUT!!!!!!!

i know i said that haymitch losing his two unborn sisters foreshadows him becoming a mentor and losing two kids each year in the hunger games. but let me talk about it again and also about snow's unborn sister.

i think snow's unborn sister is supposed to represent the fact that he never became a protector. he fails to protect his tribute as a mentor (eventually) and he as a president fails to protect the citizens of his country

NOW how many unborn sisters snow had? one (1). how many unborn sisters haymitch had? two (2). like two district citizens for each capitol citizen that lost their life in the dark days. the rules of the 50th hunger games, the number of tributes being doubled than in the regular games. two of everything. twins motif. catch me outside

[tenderwulf]

“sotr is mid because you already know how it ends” shut the fuck up, the point of the book is that despite knowing how it ends you would have never known what actually went down because that’s the point of propaganda, the whole book is about the power of propaganda

[tenderwulf]

Haymitch and his ducklings

[tenderwulf]

i love you like all-fire