thecherrypitpie

[thecherrypitpie]

I sent you omens and all kinds of signs please respond

[thecherrypitpie]

[thecherrypitpie]

“Hot and bothered” in the sense that it is 90 degrees out and I am extremely annoyed

[thecherrypitpie]

i hope luigi mangione is proven innocent & gets to sue a ton of companies for slander and win & i hope he gets enough money to rebuild his life and get any help for his chronic pain that he needs & i hope he’s able to disappear from the public eye entirely if that’s what he wants

[thecherrypitpie]

may god forgive my wretched sins (spent money)

[thecherrypitpie]

my favorite response to that datv criticism about rook being weirdly divorced from the rest of the party is the "no one in the prev games ever checked up on you either." um. y. yes they did. they did that a lot in fact.

[thecherrypitpie]

both the mage rebellion and the templars had the foresight to not send their most important people to the conclave incase someone might try something, but the chantry did not only put their most important person there, but also everyone that was an immediately obvious choice as her successor so really there problems are kinda their own fault.

[thecherrypitpie]

they should invent a 2025 where good things happen

[thecherrypitpie]

if there's one thing the breeding kink discourse taught me, it is that most of you aren't weird enough to handle solas. i'm taking him off your hands. solas dragon age is my character now and i decide that he's a freak. i decide that he's a slut and a freak and that he is capable of doing bad shit with bad intentions.

solas did drag a low approval inquisitor to the eluvian by the arm and shut it off to dismember them most traumatically. he did that shit and he was swinging his hips as he did so.

solas will sometimes bite into something particularly crunchy and think fondly of times he was in his dread wolf form eating animals bones and all while they were still alive. he might even have a lil smile about it.

solas is of the persuasion that everyone around him is inferior to him, that the lives of everyone who survived his error hold so little value that he's willing to sacrifice countless of them. he has a prejudiced and highly racist remark for every inquisitor be they elven, qunari, human, or dwarven. solas is a cunt.

and yeah, this is the same cunt who protected a random wanderer who fell asleep between the paws of his statue. yup the very same as the one who goes "that was a kind thing you did" with the softest voice in the world if his companion goes out of their way to spread some stranger's ashes where they would have wanted. same dude as the one who beelines to offer his aid to hurt refugees at the crossroads in da:i. and yes it's the same freak who loves dancing and gossip and tiny cakes and painting and who calms cole down from a panic attack. he is all of those things at once.

but give me warlord!solas. give me the solas who followed a man for twelve years to drive him to madness with laughter. give me the solas who carves vallaslin into the faces of his foes when he kills them. show me the solas who faced mythal for the first time after betraying and rebelling against her. the solas who saw the first dwarves crawl from the titans and perceived them as being beneath him, as being the severed arm of a once mighty hero, lying in a pool of blood, undirected, whatever skill at arms it had gone forever? zoom in. enhance. rotate. this solas is just as true as the caring, wise, sad solas.

i'm not saying he's evil, i'm just saying that he's not a good man. he isn't. treating him as one and excusing his failures and crimes as exclusively poorly executed but well-intended mauls him. he's such a complex, multidimensional character and i wish people would stop woobifying and sanitising him because it is such a waste!!!!! it's such a waste!!!!! let him be freaky!!!!!

[thecherrypitpie]

this just in: Date Everything (the game) can very rapidly send someone with hyper empathy into a dark spiral

[thecherrypitpie]

Martin as a character drives me crazy because the archetypal secret heir to the throne is a warrior so pure of heart that he can easily rise to the task & we get a middle aged priest who is so sad and wet and sweet and will do whatever he can but clearly feels the crushing weight of his new role far too heavily.

Just look at him. Someone please give him a job as a librarian and a cat.

[thecherrypitpie]

[thecherrypitpie]

you there 🫵 sexualize this old man with me.

[thecherrypitpie]

cursebearing hips

[thecherrypitpie]

"these researchers published a paper on something that literally any of us could have told you 🙄" ok well my supervisors wont let me write something in my thesis unless I can back it up with a citation so maybe it's a good thing that they're amplifying your voice to the scientific community in a way that prevents people from writing off your experiences as annecdotal evidence

[thecherrypitpie]

there's nothing i like more as a computer program than a long period of silent contemplation - not doing anything, not rushing anywhere, just standing here and enjoying this moment with the user. oh, it seems once again he has summoned my beautiful and ruthless wife Task Manager. hello, my darling! what are you doing with that long cruel scimitar

[thecherrypitpie]

haha thats so funny [face gets gravely serious] but were you not a staunch and trusted ally i would have you executed for such a joke