thelucoid-blog

[thelucoid-blog]

It's BBC 6 Music's annual T-Shirt Day today, celebrating authenticity in music, fandom and the glory of band tee designs. So, today I'm sporting a Babyshambles T-shirt. Not one of my oldest or most worn gig T-shirts but one that still fits, at least. And that you probably won't find copied by high street retailers. That's how T-Shirt Day began; as Wear Your Old Band T-Shirt to Work Day, to fight back against the fashion takeover of the T-shirt designs that music fans wear so close to their hearts. Old, new, much-loved, worn through, misshapen or shrunk in the wash, wear your band T-shirt with pride. #tshirtday #6Music #Babyshambles #wearyouroldbandtshirttoworkday #memories https://www.instagram.com/p/B5KoYSfAYqP/?igshid=19lq82uhdlx8s

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What was your first gig? Not the time your mate's band played the school hall (or your dad took you to see your step-brother's band in a pub, in my case), but a band on tour, someone who'd made it, that you had to buy tickets for and wanted All The Merch but had to make do with a knock-off tee from that shady bloke who had them all laid out in the road outside. Mine was Suede at Cambridge Corn Exchange in 1994. The Dog Man Star tour. And that was the start of something BIG. Live music became a massive part of my life. Recently, gigs and I have been on a break, thanks to the arrivals of A and D, but this week, I made it out to my first one in years! And how fitting that it was Suede at, you've guessed it, Cambridge Corn Exchange. This time it was me that drove there, not my friend's older brother Trevor (I mean, that would be so weird; we're not even friends any more), and I didn't elbow my way to the front to be squashed against the barriers. Instead, the lovely @emma_glitter_1 and I stood in only a minor crush, with easy access to the loos and, thankfully, not quite so many tall people in front of us that we couldn't see anything at all. Not that it was the clearest view in the world, but the atmosphere was fantastic, so much happiness and delight in the air. And we could see enough to notice that Brett's poor shirt was hanging on for dear life, apparently only attached to his body by sweat in the end, with failing buttons and a huge tear exposing his skinny ribs as he strutted his stuff. And strut he did. Even though it was the last night of the tour and his voice was going, and, let's face it, none of us are as youthfully lithe as we used to be, Brett still darted about the stage during the livelier numbers, commanding everyone's attention like some kind of master of puppets, adoration seeping out of the audience's pores. At least, I think it was adoration. What does adoration smell like? And as a final stroke of genius, the band invited all the superfans up from the front to sing Life is Golden with him on stage, leaving us with the warmest feeling and loveliest earworm for the dark drive home. #Suede #BrettAnderson #livemusic #gig #metime (at Cambridge Corn Exchange) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bw6_ITgFycn/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=4hpi2a2cibuj

[thelucoid-blog]

I have blue felt tip on my face (thanks, 1 year old!), there's a mixture of breakfast and lunch all over the kitchen floor, the dishwasher's still full from last night's cycle and the Christmas tree's still up, complete with decorations. Part of me thinks things are getting a bit out of hand. Good job I got a slow cooker for Christmas, it could save my sanity this year. I tried it out for the first time yesterday, with Jack Monroe's lentil ragu, and it was so fantastically easy! We'd planned to have it with spaghetti for tea, but had to come up with something else part-way through the day. As I live with a non-vegetarian 4 year old and was unable to produce ham sandwiches out of thin air (cheese just wasn't good enough) I was forced to open a tin of spaghetti hoops for lunch, and I didn't want to feed her pasta twice in one day so we had a lentil sheperd's (sheperdess's?) pie instead. The baby didn't touch it (new thing and all that), the 4 year old mostly just ate the mash with her fingertips (but did devour broccoli for the first time in forever), and I wolfed it down. It was so good I finished the lot, including the baby's rejects. I know, I should have saved some for the freezer but it's lucky I didn't as someone (ahem, Matt) left the freezer door ajar last night. Not much lost, thankfully. No babies were harmed in the taking of this photo, by the way. I'd only just switched the pot on. #slowcooker #vegetarian #familylife #food #familymeal #vegetarian #lentilragu #jackmonroe https://www.instagram.com/p/Bsf2958lBNc/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=15b1nrw7iowhg

[thelucoid-blog]

Always nice to get a freebie when you're at work! And you should have seen the queue for these biscuits. Not bad with my decaff cuppa, and the other flavours sound good too. Time for swapsies, I think! @naturevalley.uk @theworkperk #theworkperk https://www.instagram.com/p/Bp17z07FLHR/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=4vxq82rdop0

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This morning, our little engineer used her sister's first birthday present to make a rainbow tunnel for her train set. All the love for creative play in action! Suppose I should get her dressed now and comb the tangles out of that mop. #grimmsrainbow #briotrains #morning #play #woodentoys #familylife https://www.instagram.com/p/BoOSMvXnJfT/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=yejz07zn27an

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Does tea have magic powers? This morning we had some devastating news. A very dear friend of ours died yesterday, aged only 35. I was in pieces as soon as the initial shock passed but all it took was a click of the kettle and the soothing process of making a proper cup of tea to start to clear my head and ease the tears. Well, that and a MASSIVE hug from my wonderful 3 year old. Her hugs have magic powers, too. And then I sat and drank my hot, sugary tea, and thought about Hayley, and realised how perfect the tea was to remember this most awesome of people, who wrote her dissertation on the role of tea in English literature. Cheers to you Hayley; I am honoured to have known you. xxx #tea #friendship #magic https://www.instagram.com/p/BnyPx9zHQ-d/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1sitz5vujcrdj

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So, apparently Alice took quite an interest in the woodworking area at nursery the other day. Not exactly a surprise to me, but I guess it's taking her a while to show them the full extent of the awesome, crazy character that's out big style this morning She's always challenging things, trying stuff out, pushing everything to its limit and beyond. Create, destroy, repeat. And yes, that is a toy pushchair hat. . #hammertime #spiritedchild #familylife https://www.instagram.com/p/BnqMYu2nTYZ/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1t8v9c0279908

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I always thought I'd love doing creative stuff with my kids but, oh my god, do I find the mess and extreme enthusiasm stressful! We got the paints out last week for the first time in ages. They've been hidden away again now. It's a bit like Pandora's Box or something. Seems like a great idea at first but I'm soon filled with despair, wondering what the hell I've unleashed. They both had loads of fun, Alice painting an egg box and Daisy having her first real attempt at making marks with paint. But then... Daisy eating paint was a bit much to bear, and we still have Alice-sized welly prints in red paint on the patio. Thankfully other craft type things have been much more fun lately, and Alice loves getting her craft box out to glue random things together or cut out mad shapes. I even reorganised the box the other day and added in loads of rubbish from the recycling bag, so she now has plenty of materials to inspire her (well, it's mostly empty loo rolls, junk mail and the crap that falls out of magazines but got to start somewhere, right?). Go me! . #kidscrafts #posterpaints #babypainting #toddlerpainting #messyplay #familylife #paintedbaby #wellies #recycling #repurposing #journeytozerowaste https://www.instagram.com/p/Bm5_Jl_nJKU/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=oqxr9i6e1dht

[thelucoid-blog]

I've just stumbled across this photo from a couple of weeks ago, when my mum had 20 minutes spare to play with the baby while Alice and I spent a some rare time together, just the two of us. Alice packed us each a suitcase for a little holiday at the playing field across the road and off we trotted. I was delighted to find a book, glitter bottle, toy turtle (one of Alice's favourites) and a box of tissues in mine. I think she had colouring pencils, a pair of socks and a grabby dinosaur toy in hers. . So basically, I'm sharing this as it makes me smile. I hope I remember the little moments like this forever and can forget about the hellish ones that seem to override all the good at times. . (And yes, she did choose to wear that T-shirt herself.) . #park #summer #suitcase #toys #books #bench #wellies #Nirvana #familylife https://www.instagram.com/p/BmgrXCynP0f/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1ayg6rt1douop

[thelucoid-blog]

It's been a while since I shared a photo of Daisy eating, so here's one for the fans! She's very much enjoying her first spaghetti hoops. I haven't had them for ages - like, YEARS, but I'm so glad I got some in the other week (yup, impulse buy!) as today's definitely a lazy lunch day. We're all knackered with all the craziness of me being back at work. Meanwhile, Alice abandoned hers in protest at the addition of sweetcorn (don't worry, they went to a good home... yum!) and is now eating a yogurt as messily as only a three year old can. #babyledweaning #spaghettiontoast #spaghettihoops #messy #lazylunch #lunch #parttimeworkerfulltimemum #familylife

[thelucoid-blog]

I'm really struggling to get the girls to bed on my own at the moment (well, struggling with parenting calmly at all, to be honest) so I've brought the three of us back downstairs to give me time to reset and calm down after frustration got the better of me. Here's hoping some Duplo for them and a decaff cuppa for me will be enough to make the second attempt easier. Husband will be at his Round Table meeting for at least another hour (EEEEK!!!)... wish me luck! . #familylife #GentleParenting #maternalmentalhealth #bedtime #Duplo #playtime #evening #RoundTable

[thelucoid-blog]

I may be surrounded by the detritus of family life but with a sunny garden and the tantalising promise of a new read (plus a sleeping baby and the 3 year old having fun with daddy), I reckon I should be able to switch off from it all for at least a few minutes. Really feel like I need it today, after a week where life's felt a little fuzzy round the edges. Me time, here I am at last! . #Sunday #sunnyday #summer #book #reading #MichelFaber #TheCrimsonPetalandtheWhite #strawberries #raspberries #sunhat #tea #cuppa #stripes #garden #outdoors #MeTime #maternalmentalhealth

[thelucoid-blog]

...10k/10miles...

I signed up for a 10 mile race at the weekend. Here are my thoughts afterwards:

Do I wear shorts and shorts or shorts and leggings?

Do I run with sports gels or sweeties?

Do I take my music with?

Will there be stingy nettles?

Better eat some pasta. And on the subject of food, seeing as I’m going to be hitting higher mileage in training, it’s probably time to add in a fourth meal as well. Mmmm, breakfast cereal at bedtime…. 

And then it hit me. Higher mileage. This ain’t no 10k people. It’s 10 miles. MILES. I had let the situation get completely out of hand. I could have entered the 5k Canicross section. With a dog who, in this picture, looks like a fairground waltzer. 

Or the 10k? I mean, that’s do-able right? But no, I had managed to enter the 10 mile race. And what had seemed like a good idea at the time began to feel like a very poor life choice five miles into an eight mile run on Monday.

It’s ok, it’s ok. I’m exaggerating slightly. I got to six miles before contemplating getting a lift in the next passing tractor. No. Still I stretch the truth. I got to seven miles before stumbling into a patch of nettles and declaring I couldn’t go on. Right, stop it now. You see, the truth is, I ran a hilly (2 slopes) 10k in Titchmarsh last month in 54.24 which I’m pretty proud of. Powered by self-belief (’I am enough’), new trainers, the promise of a pub lunch and the fact that my kids would not be prepared to hang around for very long, I was pretty much on wheels and ran my fastest 10k ever.

Apart from the time I ran a 10k in 29.28. 

That’s actually from the time I ran from home to pick up my husband’s car, forgot to turn off my running watch as I drove home, so it kept timing me and I cannot figure out how to delete it. But it’s just the job for posts like this one.

It’s probably also worth mentioning I considered retiring from 10k a few years ago after finishing a race in … 59.32 … 

I put that in for no reason other than to prove practice really does make perfect. I thought I’d never run a sub sixty minute 10k again after that, but here I am, four and a bit years later, still trying and still hurtling around the countryside. 

I’ll end on this little nugget. Shall I tell you why I run? That’s easy. Because I find it hard, and although I look cute and sweet and fluffy, I like a challenge and I like to prove to myself I can do it.

Shall I tell you why I race? To show my kids if you want something you have to work for it. When they started school, they couldn’t write. When I start race training, I can’t run fast/far. But you’ve got to build up to these things. Keep practising and working. Keep chip, chip, chipping away. 

And know that you’ll get there. 

Although if I’d signed up for the 10k instead of the 10 mile, I’d get there a lot faster…

J x

[thelucoid-blog]

See this? It's only my bloomin' reading pile from two weeks ago. I used to have an exciting stack of fiction beside the bed, and went to sleep most nights with an amazing story buzzing through my brain. My reading habits have changed massively since my first child was born, and I've gone from reading thirty-plus novels a year to fewer than five. I've learnt some really useful stuff, but I've lost that switch-off time and escapism that I love. So, I picked up my ten-year-old copy of The Handmaid's Tale and kept it to hand for bedtimes and breastfeeds, and ordered some new books too. And you know what? It's been fantastic! I found out the other day that our brains can't read and think about other stuff (like laundry and what to cook and missing library books) at the same time, so it's a very mindful thing to do and great for mental health. I'll get back to the self-help stuff at some point, and they're still there beside the bed, but for now, I'm reading for pleasure. Bring on the books! #reading #books #parentingbooks #readingpile #gentleparenting #metime #selfcare #CalmParentsHappyKids #DrLauraMarkham #TheGentleDisciplineBook #SarahOckwellSmith #RaisingYourSpiritedChild #Calm #AMindfulnessGuidefortheFrazzled #RubyWax #StewartLee #ContentProvider #TheWholeBrainChild #Maternalmentalhealth #TheHandmaidsTale #MargaretAtwood

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"Would you like red or yellow, Alice?" "Green." Maybe she's a little young for Connect 4. #retrogames #Connect4

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Today was so grey and rainy I only ventured outside to empty the compost crock, and that was during a dryish spell. I don't know about you but I could do with a little pick-me-up, so here's a flashback to last week's amazing weather. Alice loved it! #nofilter #icecream #favouritephoto

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So, the playpen has a new resident and and Alice has new wellies. Nothing stays the same for long with little kids. For me, that's one of the hardest and most amazing things about being a parent, all at once. And one of the most fun things is using underpants as headwear.