therosewallkey

[therosewallkey]

"Shipabilis" coining Shipabilis = accepting shipping sobeit done respectfully cw LONG😅:

I don’t know if this is actually needed, it’s just that I’ve seen so many different takes on what these ‘subgroups’ and spaces stand for in shipping, and so wanted to make a clear distinct group for myself to identify within. 

My group/term is called shipabilis, which translates to “accepting shipping”

You may realize this sounds a whole lot like ‘proship’, and while it does hold many of the same ideas/values from a proship perspective, it differs in several aspects. And yeah I guess this sorta makes me an anti, while others may still see this as proship. And this is basically my own idea of what I wish proship was. (Taking notes from several posts.(May update these definitions in the future)) Shipabilis: adjective. 

“Shipabilis” is basically the idea “let people ship whatever fictional ship they want sobeit they portray it respectfully.” 

Ideals:

People who are shipabilis are anti-harrassment. 

People who are shipabilis are anti-censorship.

People who are shipabilis believe it is good and needed to have taboo media that can help people and people can draw from.

Someone who tolerates and does not discriminate against/harass people about any fictional ship(*done correctly/respectfully). This does not inherently mean the person does ship taboo things, just means they tolerate and don’t harass.

*When said “done correctly” this is where it differentiates itself from proship. Yes the words ‘done correctly’ does imply a moral stance. People who are shipabilis believe it is good to have taboo fictional media as long as it displays real life moral teachings. Examples:

Someone who is shipabilis will tolerate fictional media of grooming and paedophilia so long as the media makes clear to the audience that it is bad and wrong. 

Someone who is shipabilis will not support fictional  minorXadult where there is no comment about how this is morally wrong, and where this media could be used to normalize paedophilia. The shipabilis will not support it, but will also NOT harass a person over it. 

Someone who is shipabilis will tolerate fictional media displaying incest as long as the media makes clear it is wrong and does not promote it.

Someone who is shipabilis will not support fictional incest where the media does not make clear to the audience that incest is wrong. If the media seems to promote or normalize incest, the shipabilis’ will not support while also NOT harassing.

Someone who is shipabilis will tolerate fictional media that displays abuse as long as the media makes clear that abuse is wrong.

Someone who is shipabilis will not tolerate fictional media that makes it seem like abuse is not wrong. Media that victim blames or normalizes abuse. Shipabilis will not harrass people over this media either though. They will turn away and ignore.

Further Explanation/Discussion/Background: I am wanting to make this/coin this because with the research I have done I cannot find myself defining myself on either side of “pro” or “anti” ship. I have heard proship experiences, and I have heard anti experiences. The definition of both these subgroups has become so lost that the definition is drastically different depending on who you speak with.  I was also wanting to make this because while speaking to both some anti’s and some proshippers they expressed and made clear some things to me. - The proshipers told me that “all proshipper have preferences. And while I may dislike noncon and other taboos, I am still proship because I believe in ‘ship and let ship’. Anyone who  believes certain things should be censored or removed would be an anti.” - I was unable to get many/a generalized view from the ‘Antis’ because they generally just seem to be anyone against their idea of proship(which is usually taboo ships)and many antis I tried to speak with, even past proshippers, told me they had a “horrible experience with the proship community.” I didn’t ask the details but one person was able to tell me that basically “The ideas and concepts of Proshipping are to vague and widespread to simply be under one term” and that “While yes proship is about fiction, we need to acknowledge that for many people fiction impacts reality and how we view reality. So writing a minorxadult, or incest ship and not making it clear this is wrong in the real world, leads to it becoming normalized and unsensitized.”

And so again, with trying and somewhat understanding views from both sides I found I did not entirely belong with either. Because as some have said. “Proship or anti can mean so many different things now to different people.” To one person “anti” means terf, while “proship” means the same thing to another. So because I realized the flaws in certain areas of the proship community, my feelings of how fiction impacts reality, and as well as how I wouldn’t be accepted by many proclaimed antis, I realized I just needed to make my own “term” for myself, and if anyone hold my ideals they are welcome to join. 

It is complicated because I do not want anything to be censored necessarily, because then how do we decide what needs to be censored and what doesn’t? And I also do not believe in harassing a person over their views, especially when/if it hurts no one, and another especially if it’s about fiction. So my view is really just “see something you don’t like/agree with/you think should be deleted, just ignore it, don’t bring attention to it, and let it get buried in the dust of history.”

So now that we’re done with the quite long discussion/explanation/background, I will reiterate what shipabilis is. “Shipabilis’ is basically the idea “let people ship whatever fictional ship they want sobeit they portray it respectfully.”  I would say “correctly” but then that is again leaving it up to the argument of all our own differing morals and what “correct” is. So while yes my stand is portraying it ‘correctly’, you really just need to be respectful to people with things that can be and are real life experiences.  All the “anti- harassment” should just be a side detail of this. Because we should ALL be anti harassment. They should be labels you collect. You can be “anti censorship” and also consider yourself an “anti-shipper” it’s all how you view it. 

So while I as the coiner of “shipabilis” say that one of our ideals is “no harassment” I acknowledge that that is not it's only and sole distinguisher.  And say this does pick up, and one day there are others calling themself fellow “shipabilis” they cannot simply say “we stand for no harassment” and act like they are morally better just for that fact. Because there will be people who are anti-shipabilis, who are also anti-harassment. And it is because the world makes it seem so black and white, one side or the other, that led to all my confusion, and the traumatic experiences of so many from both these communities. 

From what I’ve seen many proshippers are not into the taboo ships, but label themselves ‘proship’ because it is supposedly the side of anti-harassment and anti-censorship. And that may have been what it was meant to be when it originated, but with time the meaning behind it and the community has changed. So again “shipabilis” = “when it comes to fiction, ship what you like as long as you present and indulge in it respectfully in regards to how it relates and mirrors real life and people’s irl experiences.”

And I apologize if a term for all this already exists and I have just failed to find it.

And I know some people who have been through trauma, or even not, feel “there shouldn’t stories about rape and abuse or etc. these things are not for people’s enjoyment.” And I agree partly. I understand taboo and how it can feel wrong and disrespectful. But I am also able to see and separate people’s enjoyment of media and their moral standpoint. We all have different reasons for why we ‘enjoy’ something. For some of us, we like reading drama and feeling on edge. Others like to read stories that remind them of their trauma and help them not feel alone. Some people read these things for the purpose of feeling sad. Some simply like to explore these complex dynamics and learn/educate about them. etc. I don’t know the reason, but I know that making this media is more important than trying to hide and destroy it. If you don’t make a story where it displays how something is wrong, then how are people meant to really and fully understand why. This book or fic about an abusive relationship between husband and wife, parent and child, or even just teen partners could make a difference in helping someone. So what if it’s nsfw sometimes. Sometimes we need these media, and the details, to help that one person in need to understand what's wrong and help them have words for it.  And it is for same reason above that I believe we should move away from media that can normalize these things. That same little girl or boy that read the story explaining about why their parent shouldn’t rape them, could be reading a similar thing that doesn’t make clear that this action is bad and wrong. Bury the disrespectful media and make clear and room for the media that portrays it respectfully and even if not made with educational ideas, could be the first sign or resource someone finds.

People writing books or fics of their trauma do not deserve to be harassed. And also this type of media creation or enjoyment is not solely restricted to those who have been hurt. We may have no clear answer yet to why we are drawn to this media, but it does not define our moral stance.

Fiction and nonfiction are separate, but also connected in which we must make clear what is right and wrong and we must portray it respectfully. I’m sorry that this is all so long, I just want there to be no misunderstanding of my ideals. DO NOT romanticize, normalize, simplicize, glorify, etc. abuse. No matter what type of abuse, sexual, csa, physical, psychological, mental, domestic, etc. It is all wrong and bad, and deserves and is needed to be portrayed with diligence and respect.

And another last note, if you are in a community, do not harass or milk a person for content. Especially about traumatic instances, especially x2 for children/minors. People do not owe you anything. Do not exploit them for content. 

and with that, the end of the very long coining of shipabilis.