"Her eyes and words are so icy, oh, but she burns like rum on a fire.."
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Dear, Love
I wish i had met you sooner.
You know, if you were mine when i was seventeen, i never would have such a horrible birthday and got broken hearted for the first time on the same day. That was the first time my anxiety and trust issue grew within me.
And perhaps, if i had known you since i was a little girl, i never would have gotten enough for all of the sticks and dirts that people threw on me. A tick mark on my skin and a pair of red watery eyes for each time those people disrupt me.
And if we had met two years ago, i probably would have been in your arms, enjoying the warmth of your love while we started to drift off to sleep, instead of swallowing a whole lot of irony and regrets, nearly selling myself to the grim. I would probably never know the bitterness of pills because my mouth would be too busy telling you that i love you.
I know that people can not possibly turn back time, i’m just saying, but i think if we could go back in time, and kiss before the scorching grief washed away the tear stain on my pillow that night, i would have never know what it feels like to have a desire of death.
Yet, despite of all that, i am graciously thankful for what God has given to me. You, your radiating love, and a full blithesome year without ever feeling vacant and out-casted by life. I know that i don’t need to turn back time for you. You are here now. Living in my present while settling yourself into my future. And those are the only important thing i need in my life. Maybe God loves you too much that he saved you from me while i was lost tottered by His life game. And after He saw me withered, He gave me you.
You are the hero to my hopes and dreams. The hand i would grab whenever i have pain. The mouth i would kiss whenever i feel mirthless. The tenderness i would hug whenever i need love.
It is more than from the earth, to the moon, and back again. My love for you is infinity.
Thank you for accepting me and being in my life. Please stay. Forever.
Sincerely,
The girl who loves you more.
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That wasn't me talking, because all i want to do is to kiss your face and to savor all of the love you are willing to give me. I'm tired of bawling my eyes in the middle of the night, i'm tired to be drowned in the bitterness of your absence, i'm tired of hearing the devil bickering at each other. You're the only one who keeps me grounded, but now, the bitterness has overcome your power. And once it takes over me, it will take over every senses i have for you.
My subconscious thoughts, in a crucial need of a help.
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Sally.
Did i ever tell you about Sally?
Well, that girl, she’s above everything. But on the same time, she’s also on the low.
She’s a wave. She knows she was born for something, yet she could never grip the shore.
One time Sally says she can love and she does love. But, the following day, she chooses to be alone and isolated, enjoying the dust of introverted mind she breathes in from her vague reverie.
She’s a fluctuation concept. She believes she can commit to something, she fights for the ability to grip the shore. But, every steps she walks, she’s fully aware that she’s lying to herself.
Are there any victims? Yes, there are.
And the boy would probably be one of them.
The poor boy she has walked away from on the curb. The poor boy who got rejection at that dry evening.
But the odds are he could be the antidote of her tottering mind.
That, only if he wants to.
And also, only if she can successfully gain the ability to grip the air.
Which she never did.
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I love your posts! Your writings are very inspiring and prepossessing. I bet you've had a really beautiful love happening in your life. I really want to know about that one love that has turned you into an extraordinary escapist. You should probably tell us about him more (and not in an analogical way, give the boy/girl some credit, for God's sake! haha). Anyway, i'm waiting for your next post. Keep up the good work.
Wow, i never thought someone would give me a compliment through the question box. xD You’re the first though, but why anonymous? I would really appreciate you if you didn’t cover yourself. Anyhow, thank you so much for reading my bunch of alphabetical nonsense. I’d love to post more often but i got caught up with college, drowning and sinking because of a ton of assignments to do. Gasping for air is now my obligatory ritual on a daily basis, just to keep myself away from insanity. So please, do understand.
About the boy that has turned me into an (i’d rather not call it that way) extraordinary escapist, this might be the only one chance for me to talk about him clearly, since i love to write only in analogical way.
Well, he’s the love of my life. A dreamy eyed boy with flawless hair, who really swears to give away his life just to convince me he can provide the warmest hug whenever i need it. I can’t possibly talk about him much here cause we know, by the time i found another thing i love about him to brag about, i simply couldn’t stop.
The thing about him is, he’s the only one that can keep myself sane, for i have escaped too much from reality.
I’m going to post more about him and other things that matters to me in my life. Probably not now though since i still have a ginormous amount of assignments that due this week. But i can promise you, i will post again. Maybe about the love of my life, or a fairy tale, or maybe you can give me a suggestion on what to write cause that’s even better :D Once again, i hope you understand about my lack of consistency of posting.
Thanks for reading my stories. I’ll wait for your thoughts soon. xoxo
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The Story of Maxwell. "We used to go camping together on the beach at night. Everything seems solely beautiful, especially when Papa makes a bonfire on the sand.", he uttered, his gaze was lost into the blueness of the sea, matching the color of what has been the mirror of his empty soul. "my little sister likes to catch a jellyfish. Sometimes it kills her when they sting but she'd never mind the rash.", he continued, chuckling softly. "She loves jellyfish." My stare changed painfully as i decided to turn my head towards him. A single tear caressed his cheek softly, running its touch and ending it on his sharp jaw. He was lonely. It was written on the tear. Heck, it was written in his voice all along. Never did he know that he had me. He had me attached to that tear drop on his jaw. He had me dissolved into the ocean wind that he breath. He had me whenever he wrapped his arms around me. He had me with my heart, mind, body, and soul. He never was alone and never will be. #beach #camping #photography #blackandwhite #story #excerpt #night
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The Witch and The Wolf (Part I)
Once upon a time, there lived a quaint young witch in a dark isolated forest. She was a lonely witch, the only friend she had was her own piece of mind, and a couple of cloudless doves that always perched on the windowsill of her lodge. The young witch was considered as a powerful one. She can create a fire. She can lift a mountain if she wants to. And every hex she ever put on someone always ended up with deadly suffering or even death itself. The truth is, she never was lonely. She was exiled.
People was afraid of her. They were afraid of her power, and her fluctuative sentiment. They saw her as a lonely young girl who has a power as bigger as the universe. And that had successedfully resulted fears amongst them. Fear that their future was depended on her. Fear that she could control the universe to blow them at any time. Fear that she could do bad things.
One thing they never knew was the fact that she was a good witch. Out of all the melancholic moods of her, she was an innocently-loving young girl. A cheerful one, even. Her mornings were like a folk song, and her nights were like a bed time story. She filled it with happiness and sparks of light she made with her magic. She tried to be happy, but it led her into something beyond happy. She was blessed.
One day, when the sunlight hit the skin like a bee sting, the witch decided to take a long walk in the woods. She had prepared her magic to heal some wounded or molded trees along the way. She loved to do nice things, but since there were no people around her, she did that to another living beings around her. As she reached the first mile of walks from her little hut, she encountered another living creature that made her heart skipped a beat. It was a wolf. A big, beautiful wolf. With its brownish fur shining under the sunlight. And its golden eyes piercing towards her. And at that very momet, she grabbed the wolf by its hand, and pulled it into her life with no hesitation.
Nevertheless, she didn’t realize she was missing something that day. She was too drawn into the wolf’s eyes until she forgot the fact that the wolf, no matter how stupendous it looked, was a predator.
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Hey! Let's pretend that today is the New Years Eve. Like, this hour. Pretend that it's gonna be 2016 in about 5 minutes from now. Since we can't spend it together because you have to go home and stuff, let's do it now. Let's make our new year's resolutions, our dreams, and what we're going to do in 2016. I know we can try the chance to spend it together next year, but this worth a shot, don't you think? We're here now, sitting together. We can have our own little outdoor party here. And once the clock starts ticking near the time, we can have our new year's kiss. We have to do this. Right here. Right now. What do you think?
Our Last Saturday Night of 2015.
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The Lake
He was always there. Sitting still, reflecting the dark cloudy sky above him.
He was sorely majestic. Sometimes embellished with a sprinkle of stars and moonlight. Sometimes he was just softly green, with a pattern of ripples.
Yet, out of all the exalted depictions of him, he was also a silent witness. More precisely, he witnessed us. He witnessed the first time we sat closely to each other. He witnessed our first laugh. Our first hug. Our first kiss.
Every moments of dates we've captured, every hugs, every kisses, every stories, and every songs. He witnessed them all. He witnessed our beginnings.
And he was the one who scorched those moments into a bundle of eternal ripples inside of him. Drowning our stories under the translucent water. Keeping them safe and sound.
A brief analogy of me and him.
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Prolog(ue)
It’s tugging and pulling. Mostly the girl. The boy remained silence. She’s tugging and pulling again. He jolted out. But the rope was too long. It was too long, she wasn’t sure if he moved even a bit.
“Cut the rope”, she shouted at herself, feeling the anger started to blare inside her. “You have to get him. You have to keep pulling.”
“You don’t need to do that. Stop pulling.”, he responded softly, eyes piercing at her in the distance.
The boy started to move. He took a step forward, gripping the rope and pulling it softly. His gaze were fixed on the girl. “Don’t worry. I’m coming to get you.”
A brief analogy of me and him.
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•"A week was not enough."• •"What do you miss about here?"• •"Simple things. The chaotic ambience. The people. The traffic. The way the steaming euphoria makes everything feels sorely delusional."• •"That's odd."• •"And you. I miss you."•
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