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[This idea has been rattling in my brain and I had to share it.]

I know we all love the ‘humans are space orcs’ concept… but imagine, onboard the new ship they’ve been assigned to, the human meets an actual space orc. A massive monster… fangs and tusks and scars and a battle-hardened stare, looming over all the other life forms on the ship in its thick indestructible armour it refuses to remove. It barely drinks, it doesn’t need sleep, its massive shoulders are heavy with the terrible things it has experienced. Compared to the squishy & delicate human body, this thing is a walking tank.

… Except instead of hating/ignoring one another, the human and the monster start bonding over both coming from death planets. The human is excited to find a life form who doesn’t quiver with fear at the vague description of a jellyfish and the monster is ecstatic to meet someone who understands the feeling of being bitten by a qua’lem (cats are pretty close). They sit together and compare dangerous animals and locations as the other aliens look on in confusion and fear… oh, you also have dense jungles of deadly hidden predators, boiling acid lakes, tamed predatory killers, and areas with horrendously high and low temperatures? Sick!! 

It doesn’t take long before the two of them become totally inseparable. The human loves not feeling like some kind of crazy outsider and the monster is overjoyed they’ve finally found an equal in this unkillable marshmallow.

Monster: When I was a youngling, a grol-lik stung straight through my armour. The pain lasted for approximately 16 human hours. Human: Oh yeah man, I get that. As a kid I got a wasp stuck in my shirt. It stung me like four times, it was awful, and all my cousins just laughed at me… Monster: [using their arm screen to research human courting methods] I see.

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Watching a game

(Sorry the lighting is kinda ass 💀)

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Yeah I'm into phrenology but I don't like, really believe in it. it's just for fun. could you tell me the dimensions of your brow? oh that makes so much sense you can be really aggressive haha. wow your nostrils are really wide too are you capable of empathy? Idk I just don't want to date anyone with your head shape it gives me the ick

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"When you're trying to have a hot girl summer, but the governments decide to start WWIII😭😭"

Location: Bumfuck, Oklahoma

"Dying in WWIII wasn't on my 2025 bucketlist 💀🫣"

Location: Sydney, Australia

"Look at the strawberry varenyky I made"

Location: Kyiv, Ukraine

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My ghost raven Neil au bc I've shown it everywhere but on Tumblr 💀💀💀

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imagine eddie making a new friend, someone who's 100% unrelated to anyone or anything else in eddie's life, just a guy he meets at the gym and vibes with. and the guy thinks that buck is eddie's husband. it takes eddie a while to realise that's what his new pal had taken away from their chat about their kids, where more than half of the photos of chris eddie showed off had buck in them. so at first eddie's just too fucking startled to correct him when idk CRAIG says 'oh shoot that's my bus, gotta go, but hey you and buck should come round for dinner one day. my husband keeps saying we need to make more queer friends with kids since we moved here! ok byeeee' and eddie goes home thinking I'll just explain next time I see him it's fine and hey I can hook him up with hen and karen I bet they'll get along great. and the thought makes him feel...... something.

and he is going to explain to craig, he is, but the next time they bump into each other is right after him and buck have had an argument, like they keep having since buck moved into his new place, and it's nice to be able to vent to someone who doesn't know buck but who has the right... well, no, the wrong idea about what place buck occupies in eddie's life. but it's nice to be able to vent without having to explain. so eddie doesn't explain. and he keeps not explaining, while craig gets the impression that eddie and buck are going through a really rough patch since buck's dad died but eddie wants to make it work while buck keeps pulling away.

OBVIOUSLY they're grabbing coffee one day when buck happens to walk into the same coffee shop. EDDIE! HEY! and... uh who's this?

eddie, kill bill sirens blaring: this is craig. my... friend. from the gym.

buck: oh that's cool... you've never mentioned him before....

craig, desperately: you must be buck!! I've heard so much about you! don't worry, I'm a married man, not that you would have anything to worry about anyway. eddie's so committed

buck: he is?

eddie with one thousand yard stare: i am

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attack dog

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(okay no, but put in the tags something youre the unofficial influencer of. Like something youve purchased enough, used enough, bragged about and endorsed enough to others that you should be an influencer for)

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Final/Part 4: Messing with straight hair!

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Andrew Minyard talks like that because hes supposed to be a noir detective, but life made him a jock who hates learning about other people and no fixed address with which to develop a codependent relationship.

Neil Josten talks like that because he was supposed to be the femme fatale, except he's too asexual to intentionally seduce anyone and too obsessive and paranoid to notice when somebody falls for him anyway.

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the transition from people needing each other to wanting each other is literally one of my greatest weaknesses that shit makes me want to walk into the sea and sit on the ocean floor for a thousand years

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fabulous creature?

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'Don't look at me like that.'

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The Foxhole Court Chapter 1 Webcomic

Part 1 >> Next

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